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Last Wish
At a time when tempers flare over the Oregon assisted suicide law and Jack Kevorkian's physician-aid-in-dying, Last Wish , Betty Rollin's groundbreaking New York Times bestseller, is due for a rereading. Last Wish is an intimate, fiercely honest memoir of a daughter's struggle to come to terms with her terminally ill mother's decision to die. More than a examination of the ethical, spiritual, and technical aspects of assisted suicide, Last Wish is also a celebration of Rollin's imperfect family, a passionate testament to her mother's character and courage, and a compelling argument for the right of the terminally ill to a humane and dignified death. The PublicAffairs paperback edition includes a new foreword, questions for thought and discussion, and a helpful resource guide.
272 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 1985
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About the author
Betty Rollin
9Ìýbooks2ÌýfollowersBetty Rollin is a TV correspondent, an accomplished author and a captivating speaker. A former correspondent for NBC News, her special reports for Nightly News included a series on the Native Americans of Pine Ridge, South Dakota, which won both the duPont and Emmy awards. She now contributes reports for PBS' Religion and Ethics Newsweekly.
Rollin is the author of seven books, including "First, You Cry", a moving story - the first of its kind - about her breast cancer and mastectomy. Published in 1976 and re-published in 2000 in honor of the author's 25th "cancer anniversary", it received wide critical acclaim and was made into a television movie starring Mary Tyler Moore as Ms. Rollin.
Her newest book, Here's the Bright Side (of Failure, Fear, Cancer, Divorce and Other Bum Raps), was published by Random House in April, 2007.
Her bestseller Last Wish, published in 1985 and republished in 1998 deals with the suicide of her terminally ill mother. One critic called it "a document of personal compassion and public importance." The book has been published in 18 foreign countries and was made into a TV movie, which aired on ABC in 1992, starring Patty Duke and Maureen Stapleton.
Rollin first joined NBC in 1972 as a reporter for the newsmagazine, Chronolog and during 1972 she was the on-air theater critic for WNBC-TV, New York. She later created and anchored a series of NBC News's special programs for and about women titled Women Like Us. In January of 1973 she was named a correspondent for NBC News. In this position, she reported on human-interest stories, which remain her main focus as a journalist. In 1982 she became a contributing correspondent for ABC News Nightline. She left that position to write Last Wish and returned to NBC News in 1984.
Prior to her television career, Betty Rollin was an associate feature editor and staff writer for Vogue magazine. Following that, she became a senior editor for Look magazine, where she remained until the publication was discontinued in 1971. She has contributed articles to many national magazines, including The New York Times where she was also a Hers columnist.
A native New Yorker, Rollin is a graduate of Fieldston Ethical Culture School in Riverdale, NY and Sarah Lawrence College. She and her husband, Dr. Harold M. Edwards, a mathematician, live in Manhattan.
Rollin is the author of seven books, including "First, You Cry", a moving story - the first of its kind - about her breast cancer and mastectomy. Published in 1976 and re-published in 2000 in honor of the author's 25th "cancer anniversary", it received wide critical acclaim and was made into a television movie starring Mary Tyler Moore as Ms. Rollin.
Her newest book, Here's the Bright Side (of Failure, Fear, Cancer, Divorce and Other Bum Raps), was published by Random House in April, 2007.
Her bestseller Last Wish, published in 1985 and republished in 1998 deals with the suicide of her terminally ill mother. One critic called it "a document of personal compassion and public importance." The book has been published in 18 foreign countries and was made into a TV movie, which aired on ABC in 1992, starring Patty Duke and Maureen Stapleton.
Rollin first joined NBC in 1972 as a reporter for the newsmagazine, Chronolog and during 1972 she was the on-air theater critic for WNBC-TV, New York. She later created and anchored a series of NBC News's special programs for and about women titled Women Like Us. In January of 1973 she was named a correspondent for NBC News. In this position, she reported on human-interest stories, which remain her main focus as a journalist. In 1982 she became a contributing correspondent for ABC News Nightline. She left that position to write Last Wish and returned to NBC News in 1984.
Prior to her television career, Betty Rollin was an associate feature editor and staff writer for Vogue magazine. Following that, she became a senior editor for Look magazine, where she remained until the publication was discontinued in 1971. She has contributed articles to many national magazines, including The New York Times where she was also a Hers columnist.
A native New Yorker, Rollin is a graduate of Fieldston Ethical Culture School in Riverdale, NY and Sarah Lawrence College. She and her husband, Dr. Harold M. Edwards, a mathematician, live in Manhattan.
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Displaying 1 - 20 of 20 reviews
April 30, 2014
In a time when tempers flare over Oregon's assisted-suicide law, and the debate still rages on both sides of the issue regarding Jack Kevorkian's physician-aided 'death with dignity' practice - Betty Rollin's groundbreaking New York Times Bestseller, Last Wish is an intimate, fiercely honest memoir of a daughter's struggle to come to terms with her terminally ill mother Ida's, decision to die. More than a simple examination of the ethical, spiritual, and technical aspects of assisted suicide, Last Wish is a celebration of Ms. Rollin's imperfect family, a passionate tribute to Ida's character and courage in the face of adversity, and a compelling argument for the right of the terminally ill to a humane and dignified death.
I must say that while this book certainly is sad, by no means is it written in a morose or depressing way. I found it incredibly poignant and down-to-earth. This family faced an impossible, emotionally grueling situation and dealt with their issues in the most courageous and loving manner possible. I give this book an A+!
I must say that while this book certainly is sad, by no means is it written in a morose or depressing way. I found it incredibly poignant and down-to-earth. This family faced an impossible, emotionally grueling situation and dealt with their issues in the most courageous and loving manner possible. I give this book an A+!
December 3, 2013
Until you have cared for a loved one dying from ugly cancer you cannot truly understand this book. I cried, I laughed, I mourned, I learned. I read this book after caring for my mother as she died at a young age....it helped heal me in ways I still feel.
October 13, 2010
This book was a difficult read. Betty Rollins writes a book about her mother's last wish -- to die at her own hand rather than to suffer the ravages of cancer. The book is divided roughly into three parts:
First, it's a portrait of Betty's mother, Ida, a daughter of Russian Jewish immigrants who grew up in New York, was married for 40 years to a man she loved, and raised one child, the author. Betty describes her mother as intelligent, organized, assertive, determined and guided by reason. She was also one to make friends quickly and to adopt many children of all ages and to fuss over them. She also wanted the Best for her daughter and doted on her and encouraged her to succeed in all venues.
The second section details Ida's diagnosis and treatment of ovarian cancer. After a rough first series of chemotherapy treatments, Ida enjoyed a year's remission before receiving the news that her cancer was back with a vengance. The doctors knew that this time the cancer would win, and chemo would only manage to shrink the tumor for a time, giving relief to her digestive track. This amounted to torture for Ida, and she wanted a way out, "a door," as Ida described it.
The last third of the book is Ida's quest for physician-assisted suicide, which did not exist in 1983. So Betty, an experienced journalist, assisted her mother by gathering information and trying to find someone in the medical field who could give them information about what pills or combination of pills would achieve Ida's death.
It's an odd little book because of the patchwork of emotions it evokes as Betty describes the pain of the cancer, the tenderness of the mother-daughter relationship, the logic of researching the "solution" to Ida's problem, the slowing of time as the moment of Ida's suicide approaches.
I am not sure whether or not I agree with Ida's decision or Betty's support, but I do agree that Betty does a good job describing her mother, their dilemma and the chain of events concluding in Ida's life.
First, it's a portrait of Betty's mother, Ida, a daughter of Russian Jewish immigrants who grew up in New York, was married for 40 years to a man she loved, and raised one child, the author. Betty describes her mother as intelligent, organized, assertive, determined and guided by reason. She was also one to make friends quickly and to adopt many children of all ages and to fuss over them. She also wanted the Best for her daughter and doted on her and encouraged her to succeed in all venues.
The second section details Ida's diagnosis and treatment of ovarian cancer. After a rough first series of chemotherapy treatments, Ida enjoyed a year's remission before receiving the news that her cancer was back with a vengance. The doctors knew that this time the cancer would win, and chemo would only manage to shrink the tumor for a time, giving relief to her digestive track. This amounted to torture for Ida, and she wanted a way out, "a door," as Ida described it.
The last third of the book is Ida's quest for physician-assisted suicide, which did not exist in 1983. So Betty, an experienced journalist, assisted her mother by gathering information and trying to find someone in the medical field who could give them information about what pills or combination of pills would achieve Ida's death.
It's an odd little book because of the patchwork of emotions it evokes as Betty describes the pain of the cancer, the tenderness of the mother-daughter relationship, the logic of researching the "solution" to Ida's problem, the slowing of time as the moment of Ida's suicide approaches.
I am not sure whether or not I agree with Ida's decision or Betty's support, but I do agree that Betty does a good job describing her mother, their dilemma and the chain of events concluding in Ida's life.
September 13, 2022
i NEED everyone to read this
October 2, 2019
I appreciate the candor with which Rollin discusses her mother's wish to die. I like the way Rollin came to realize that her mother's days weren't going to get any better. I think family members hold out hope sometimes without thinking about the physical pain a person is going through.
August 20, 2023
Verhaal over n moeder die door kanker wordt verteerd en graag uit t leven wil stappen. In VS waar euthanasie geen optie is. Dochter helpt. Een hartverwarmende beschouwing op het leven en karakter van de moeder en het ziekteproces dat uiteindelijk leidt tot de ultieme blijk van liefde.
January 30, 2019
A good read about Euthanasia
November 22, 2024
Not sure what to think of it. I will say it is well written and far from boring. I get it; I’m just not sure of the ethics yeah or nay.
September 22, 2012
Last Wish is both uplifting and heartrending. At once a beautifully-written, loving tribute to the author's mother, a harsh critique of the medical system (as it existed in the 1980's, in any case), and an unflinching exposé on assisted suicide, this engrossing and compelling story should be required reading for young and old alike.
I did notice a certain "datedness" in Rollin's depiction of race relations that some might find offensive--for example, the fact that the in-home care nurses were all Black, and one of them (a Jamaican nurse named Belva) felt uncomfortable addressing her white employer by her first name. Nonetheless, this story is as relevant today as when it was published in 1985. Whatever one's religious persuasion, we cannot know how we will feel about our life until faced with a debilitating, terminal, and tortuously painful final illness.
I am a firm believer in the right of each individual to make his or her own end-of-life decisions, including suicide if circumstances are dire enough to warrant such extreme action. I take comfort in knowing that choice is available to me–as a practical if not legal matter, and hope I am never in a position to seriously contemplate exercising it. Despite the fact that only three states (Montana, Oregon and Washington) have adopted statutes permitting physician-assisted suicide, and 36 states (including New York and California) have laws expressly criminalizing it, I assume that with the advent of the Internet, it would not be anywhere near as risky or difficult to accomplish as it was for the Rollin family.
On that score, Rollin was nothing short of phenomenal in her handling of this touchy aspect. She does not shy away from offering unsentimental, nuts-and-bolts facts, yet veers just shy of turning her book into a gory sideshow. All the while, she unabashedly handles her own misgivings and emotional torment with sensitivity and grace. I commend both her touching and delicate treatment of her mother's final wish and her courage in sharing this very important story with the public at a time when it was a far more taboo subject than one might imagine.
I did notice a certain "datedness" in Rollin's depiction of race relations that some might find offensive--for example, the fact that the in-home care nurses were all Black, and one of them (a Jamaican nurse named Belva) felt uncomfortable addressing her white employer by her first name. Nonetheless, this story is as relevant today as when it was published in 1985. Whatever one's religious persuasion, we cannot know how we will feel about our life until faced with a debilitating, terminal, and tortuously painful final illness.
I am a firm believer in the right of each individual to make his or her own end-of-life decisions, including suicide if circumstances are dire enough to warrant such extreme action. I take comfort in knowing that choice is available to me–as a practical if not legal matter, and hope I am never in a position to seriously contemplate exercising it. Despite the fact that only three states (Montana, Oregon and Washington) have adopted statutes permitting physician-assisted suicide, and 36 states (including New York and California) have laws expressly criminalizing it, I assume that with the advent of the Internet, it would not be anywhere near as risky or difficult to accomplish as it was for the Rollin family.
On that score, Rollin was nothing short of phenomenal in her handling of this touchy aspect. She does not shy away from offering unsentimental, nuts-and-bolts facts, yet veers just shy of turning her book into a gory sideshow. All the while, she unabashedly handles her own misgivings and emotional torment with sensitivity and grace. I commend both her touching and delicate treatment of her mother's final wish and her courage in sharing this very important story with the public at a time when it was a far more taboo subject than one might imagine.
February 25, 2013
I didn't love it but I did find it a worthwhile topic that is as relevant today as it was when it was written.
Rollin writes of her experience with her mother's wish to die. Her mother had ovarian cancer and had reached a point where she did not feel she was living any more. It was time to go. She asked her daughter, in muted terms, to find the way. Betty was careful in her research and in her conversations with her mother. She did not want to push her one way or another, but did want to respect her wish. Ultimately, Betty knew that if her mother had the means to end her life that this may be all that she needed; she may not go through with it. But she needed to have that power. I think a lot of us can understand this.
In telling this story Betty also tells us about her mother. She sounds like a generous, deeply caring mother, who served as cheerleader for her precious daughter and ultimately for her daughter's second husband as well. We can feel the love Betty had for her.
I tend to be outside the mainstream in a lot of ways, but I think I'm with it in this one. I suspect most of this country would like to find a way to allow seriously ill persons to leave this earth gracefully.
I'm not so much with the mainstream in a much lesser area that also finds its way into this book. Betty talks about her mother's obsession with healthy foods, and refers to Nathan Pritikin as her god at one point. We are left thinking that Ida Rollin followed Pritikin's recommendations and that the food was sugar-free and generally tasteless. I happen to know what Pritikin has written and it is not what this family ate. He would have frowned on the fish, for example. And if Ida had been following it closely she would not have been fat. I suspect that Ida was following some other guru - maybe that Sugar Addict guy. I know this is a minor point but I feel I must point out that Pritikin offers a healthy, enjoyable way of life that is worth following and that bears no real resemblance to whatever Ida espoused.
Overall, the book covers well a subject that is still worth discussing.
Rollin writes of her experience with her mother's wish to die. Her mother had ovarian cancer and had reached a point where she did not feel she was living any more. It was time to go. She asked her daughter, in muted terms, to find the way. Betty was careful in her research and in her conversations with her mother. She did not want to push her one way or another, but did want to respect her wish. Ultimately, Betty knew that if her mother had the means to end her life that this may be all that she needed; she may not go through with it. But she needed to have that power. I think a lot of us can understand this.
In telling this story Betty also tells us about her mother. She sounds like a generous, deeply caring mother, who served as cheerleader for her precious daughter and ultimately for her daughter's second husband as well. We can feel the love Betty had for her.
I tend to be outside the mainstream in a lot of ways, but I think I'm with it in this one. I suspect most of this country would like to find a way to allow seriously ill persons to leave this earth gracefully.
I'm not so much with the mainstream in a much lesser area that also finds its way into this book. Betty talks about her mother's obsession with healthy foods, and refers to Nathan Pritikin as her god at one point. We are left thinking that Ida Rollin followed Pritikin's recommendations and that the food was sugar-free and generally tasteless. I happen to know what Pritikin has written and it is not what this family ate. He would have frowned on the fish, for example. And if Ida had been following it closely she would not have been fat. I suspect that Ida was following some other guru - maybe that Sugar Addict guy. I know this is a minor point but I feel I must point out that Pritikin offers a healthy, enjoyable way of life that is worth following and that bears no real resemblance to whatever Ida espoused.
Overall, the book covers well a subject that is still worth discussing.
December 10, 2018
When my sister read "First, You Cry" by Betty Rollin, I thought I remembered having that author downstairs on my shelves that I do not peruse very often. And sure enough, there it was.... this second book by Betty Rollin whose 76-year-old mother was dying of ovarian cancer very slowly and painfully. This story revolves around her mother wanting to end her life and the process of finding information to help her with her suicide and dealing with the pain of the whole process. It is well-written and engrossing, as well as touching.
There have also been movies made from Rollin's two autobiographical books - "First, You Cry" and this one.
There have also been movies made from Rollin's two autobiographical books - "First, You Cry" and this one.
September 23, 2007
Last Wish was written long before Jack Kevorkian was a household name. It is the personal account of a woman who travels the world for information and prescription drugs that are necessary in assisting her terminally ill mother to end her life. It is a provokative story that has stuck with me since I read it in 1985.
January 30, 2015
At the time I read this book, I had just had a baby and one of my close friends had terminal ovarian cancer. Emotionally I didn't know if I could read this book or not, but I did and I was glad that I read it. It gave me a different perspective; not only did I understand the emotions that the author was going through, but also her mother, who had terminal cancer.
April 23, 2012
This book made all of my emotions come alive; from sadness of the pain Ida and her family suffered to the joy they all felt when a answer was found. It should be a must read for everyone. Though I cried and felt the emotions of a daughter in that position, I loved the story.
September 10, 2008
This book is about the love and miss understandings between a mother and a daughter which is surrounded by a profound circumstance.
February 8, 2010
This is hard to read. Cancer is so unforgiving. It is depressing, but I had to finish it. In facing death, we have to learn something about ourselves.
September 20, 2010
I read this book today, starting before church, and ending this evening. Very sad, depressing. If I had the opportunity to meet Betty Rollin, I don't know if I would hit her or hug her.
September 8, 2011
Very sad! A deeply emtional book about a daughter's lover and a mother last wish...to give up fighting cancer...
February 27, 2015
Thought provoking. Made into a thought provoking movie.
January 19, 2016
Last Wish" is the true story of the author, Betty Rollin's mother. Heartfelt book
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