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Messy Perfect
Perfect for fans of Mason Deaver and Becky Albertalli, this tender, raucous novel follows a rule-following, perfectionist teen who starts an underground GSA clubather conservative Catholic high school, from the acclaimed author ofKings, Queens, and In-Betweens.
Cassie Perera is a star student in St. Luke's junior class. But the new school year brings an unwelcome surprise—the return to St. Luke's of Cassie's former friend, Ben, who left a few years ago after a homophobic bullying incident Cassie knows she didn't do enough to prevent.
Still harboring guilt from her inaction, Cassie decides, in her usual, overzealous way, to team up with the neighboring public school to found an underground Gender and Sexuality Alliance—as a complicated strategy for making things up to Ben. Secretly, Cassie is also tempted by the possibility of opening up about her own sexuality for the first time.
As Cassie’s new friends urge her out of her comfort zone, she unlocks a kind of joy and freedom she’s never felt before—even as she struggles to balance these experiences with her typical tightrope of being the perfect daughter, student, and Catholic.
Cassie’s perfectly curated life unravels into turmoil, but can she embrace themess enough to piece together something new?
Cassie Perera is a star student in St. Luke's junior class. But the new school year brings an unwelcome surprise—the return to St. Luke's of Cassie's former friend, Ben, who left a few years ago after a homophobic bullying incident Cassie knows she didn't do enough to prevent.
Still harboring guilt from her inaction, Cassie decides, in her usual, overzealous way, to team up with the neighboring public school to found an underground Gender and Sexuality Alliance—as a complicated strategy for making things up to Ben. Secretly, Cassie is also tempted by the possibility of opening up about her own sexuality for the first time.
As Cassie’s new friends urge her out of her comfort zone, she unlocks a kind of joy and freedom she’s never felt before—even as she struggles to balance these experiences with her typical tightrope of being the perfect daughter, student, and Catholic.
Cassie’s perfectly curated life unravels into turmoil, but can she embrace themess enough to piece together something new?
400 pages, Hardcover
First published April 1, 2025
7 people are currently reading
3,504 people want to read
About the author
Tanya Boteju
5books252followersTANYA BOTEJU lives on the unceded territories of the Musqueam, Squamish, and Tsleil-Waututh First Nations (Vancouver, BC). Part-time, she teaches English to clever and sassy young people. The rest of her time, she uses writing as an excuse to eat pastries. Her debut novel, KINGS, QUEENS, AND IN-BETWEENS, was named a Top Ten Indie Next Pick by the American Booksellers Association, as well as selected for the American Librarian Association 2020 Rainbow List. Her second novel, BRUISED, was selected as a Gold Standard book by the Junior Library Guild. Look for another YA novel, MESSY PERFECT, and a middle grade nonfiction book about allyship in 2025. In both her teaching and writing, Tanya hopes she’s bending the universe even the tiniest bit toward justice. Visit her at tanyaboteju.com.
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Displaying 1 - 11 of 11 reviews
April 5, 2025
I was raised in a queer-accepting and agnostic household, so I couldn’t tell you why religious queer stories get to me so much, but they do. Cassie is determined to be a good girl, to be perfect, in the particularly painful way that manifests in a Catholic queer girl of colour. Even while she accepts her new friends� queerness, she doesn’t feel like it’s possible for her.
I felt so stressed for Cassie, especially near the end of the book. In my very brief time as a high school English teacher, I worried about how easy it is for high school students to fall through the cracks. Where in elementary school, you have one teacher most of the day who hopefully can see if something’s wrong, that responsibility is split between a bunch of different teachers in high school who are seeing hundreds of students in a day. As Cassie burns the candle at both ends trying to keep up her image of perfection, she flies under the radar for far too long. (When I got to the acknowledgments, I found out the author is a high school English teacher!)
I cried through the last section of the book as Cassie fails to live up to her own exacting standards and begins to mentally berate herself. I think this is really common for girls in general, but especially marginalized girls—to stake their self worth on being perfect. It sets them up to fail, and it’s devastating for their self esteem.
I don’t read a lot of YA these days, but this was a good reminder of how much it can still affect me, even now that I’m double the main character’s age. Despite me crying through a good chunk, this ultimately is a hopeful and healing read, and it deserves to be on high school library shelves—especially in the Catholic schools.
Full review at .
I felt so stressed for Cassie, especially near the end of the book. In my very brief time as a high school English teacher, I worried about how easy it is for high school students to fall through the cracks. Where in elementary school, you have one teacher most of the day who hopefully can see if something’s wrong, that responsibility is split between a bunch of different teachers in high school who are seeing hundreds of students in a day. As Cassie burns the candle at both ends trying to keep up her image of perfection, she flies under the radar for far too long. (When I got to the acknowledgments, I found out the author is a high school English teacher!)
I cried through the last section of the book as Cassie fails to live up to her own exacting standards and begins to mentally berate herself. I think this is really common for girls in general, but especially marginalized girls—to stake their self worth on being perfect. It sets them up to fail, and it’s devastating for their self esteem.
I don’t read a lot of YA these days, but this was a good reminder of how much it can still affect me, even now that I’m double the main character’s age. Despite me crying through a good chunk, this ultimately is a hopeful and healing read, and it deserves to be on high school library shelves—especially in the Catholic schools.
Full review at .
March 29, 2025
A beautifully messy and oh so relatable YA queer coming of age story about Cassie, a high school senior at a private Catholic school who is determined to make up for past mistakes with an old friend and subversively works to support different queer friendly initiatives for her classmates.
She befriends members of the public school's Gender and Sexuality Alliance and along the way discovers she may not be as straight as she's so desperately been trying to insist.
I thought the author did such a great job showing how complicated it can be for some teens to reconcile their gender and sexual identity with their religious beliefs. Cassie also finds an ally in her school's librarian who brings in LGBTQIA+ books.
Great on audio with excellent anxiety rep, this is a new favorite for me by Canadian author Tanya Boteju and perfect for fans of Sonora Reyes. Many thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for an early digital and audio copy in exchange for my honest review!
She befriends members of the public school's Gender and Sexuality Alliance and along the way discovers she may not be as straight as she's so desperately been trying to insist.
I thought the author did such a great job showing how complicated it can be for some teens to reconcile their gender and sexual identity with their religious beliefs. Cassie also finds an ally in her school's librarian who brings in LGBTQIA+ books.
Great on audio with excellent anxiety rep, this is a new favorite for me by Canadian author Tanya Boteju and perfect for fans of Sonora Reyes. Many thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for an early digital and audio copy in exchange for my honest review!
March 28, 2025
3.3
*Review to come*
*Review to come*
July 31, 2024
I never really enjoy being the first to drop a review but here we go.
So I've read both of Tanya Boteju's other books and enjoyed both (Though I'll admit stuck in my head more than ) so when I saw she was releasing a book with religious themes as well, I was excited as I eat that up. And for the most part, I feel like this book delivered on what I was looking for!
Messy Perfect follows Cassie Perera, who is the quintessential perfect student at her Catholic high school. Perfect, grades, on the volleyball team and student council, and volunteers for the library. If there is something that needs to be done, you can count on Cassie. Except when her childhood best friend Ben reemerges after being gone for several years, it throws Cassie's equilibrium off. She feels guilty for an event in their past and tries to make it up to Ben by starting an underground GSA at their school. And this opens up Cassie's world in a whole new way.
When I first read the blurb of this book, it kinda reminded me of a newer version of Geography Club by Brent Hartinger, except with a female protagonist and a private school with the concept of a secret GSA. So that drew me in. And I think it compares well. I found the book to be powerful, with rich interesting characters I was emotionally invested in quickly.
I really loved Cassie from the getgo. Girl was pushing herself so hard. I loved her and felt for her. She pushes herself way harder than I did in high school, and my whole read was like "girl don't burn yourself out." She was a really well developed character. You could tell that the reason she takes so much in was as a crutch to get over the emotional struggles she had with her identity and the church. Ben was a cool character too, and I found his plot twist very amusing. I really enjoyed all the GSA characters too and the sides they were able to bring out of Cassie.
And the way the church was handled was interesting to me. I liked that there was a lot of different views displayed from some people wanting to throw it all out, to people not knowing how to reconcile their beliefs, to others who didn't have a problem intertwining both. I don't want tot venture into spoilery territory, but I think it was handled with grace and I enjoyed it.
There is a glaring issue I had while reading the book, and while it wasn't a MAJOR issue for me, it did take me out of the believability range. A lot of the actions the GSA does at St. Luke's are public displays in the hallways of the school, outside the front doors, or in the library. And there's this big thing of the school not knowing who is behind them, and searching for the perpitraitors. BUT this is 2024 (or 2025 when this book comes out.) I find there to be no way that a an established school doesn't have security cameras in public areas such as the hallways and doors. I know people that work in public and private schools. And while there aren't cameras in classrooms, there are almost always cameras in hallways and outside the building. So this whole plot point seemed really improbable to me. If the setting of the book was set more 10-12 years in the past I could believe this more, but also then a lot of language the students use may have to be updated. I don't know if this issue will bother everyone, but it did me.
And the smallest of things, this book did go out of it's way to show a lot of different identities queer people have but I don't think there were any trans feminine characters at all. I don't know, it is probably unintentional, but when like most other identities were there, it did stand out to me.
All in all, this was a very enjoyable book I think a lot of people, especially young people who grew up in religious environments will enjoy. 4/5
Thank you to HarperCollins for this ARC.
So I've read both of Tanya Boteju's other books and enjoyed both (Though I'll admit stuck in my head more than ) so when I saw she was releasing a book with religious themes as well, I was excited as I eat that up. And for the most part, I feel like this book delivered on what I was looking for!
Messy Perfect follows Cassie Perera, who is the quintessential perfect student at her Catholic high school. Perfect, grades, on the volleyball team and student council, and volunteers for the library. If there is something that needs to be done, you can count on Cassie. Except when her childhood best friend Ben reemerges after being gone for several years, it throws Cassie's equilibrium off. She feels guilty for an event in their past and tries to make it up to Ben by starting an underground GSA at their school. And this opens up Cassie's world in a whole new way.
When I first read the blurb of this book, it kinda reminded me of a newer version of Geography Club by Brent Hartinger, except with a female protagonist and a private school with the concept of a secret GSA. So that drew me in. And I think it compares well. I found the book to be powerful, with rich interesting characters I was emotionally invested in quickly.
I really loved Cassie from the getgo. Girl was pushing herself so hard. I loved her and felt for her. She pushes herself way harder than I did in high school, and my whole read was like "girl don't burn yourself out." She was a really well developed character. You could tell that the reason she takes so much in was as a crutch to get over the emotional struggles she had with her identity and the church. Ben was a cool character too, and I found his plot twist very amusing. I really enjoyed all the GSA characters too and the sides they were able to bring out of Cassie.
And the way the church was handled was interesting to me. I liked that there was a lot of different views displayed from some people wanting to throw it all out, to people not knowing how to reconcile their beliefs, to others who didn't have a problem intertwining both. I don't want tot venture into spoilery territory, but I think it was handled with grace and I enjoyed it.
There is a glaring issue I had while reading the book, and while it wasn't a MAJOR issue for me, it did take me out of the believability range. A lot of the actions the GSA does at St. Luke's are public displays in the hallways of the school, outside the front doors, or in the library. And there's this big thing of the school not knowing who is behind them, and searching for the perpitraitors. BUT this is 2024 (or 2025 when this book comes out.) I find there to be no way that a an established school doesn't have security cameras in public areas such as the hallways and doors. I know people that work in public and private schools. And while there aren't cameras in classrooms, there are almost always cameras in hallways and outside the building. So this whole plot point seemed really improbable to me. If the setting of the book was set more 10-12 years in the past I could believe this more, but also then a lot of language the students use may have to be updated. I don't know if this issue will bother everyone, but it did me.
And the smallest of things, this book did go out of it's way to show a lot of different identities queer people have but I don't think there were any trans feminine characters at all. I don't know, it is probably unintentional, but when like most other identities were there, it did stand out to me.
All in all, this was a very enjoyable book I think a lot of people, especially young people who grew up in religious environments will enjoy. 4/5
Thank you to HarperCollins for this ARC.
January 28, 2025
MESSY PERFECT by Tanya Boteju is outstanding. I've been a fan of Boteju's writing since Kings, Queens, and In-Betweens and Messy Perfect is her best book by far. I can't recommend it highly enough.
Cassie is an excellent, messy main character. She makes big mistakes, she makes assumptions, she creates issues and it's so fantastic to read a protagonist who makes messes. To be fair, Cassie doesn't mean to make mistakes or messes; these things happen because she places such intense pressure on herself to be perfect. The perfect student, the perfect girl in church, the perfect daughter... This pressure even caused her to betray her best friend Ben when they were very young. Then he moved away.
Now that Ben's moved back, Cassie's determined to make things right with him by creating a GSA group. Her religious school won't allow it and Cassie finds herself teaming with a small group of students from the nearby high school to create an "underground" GSA group. This brings about a fantastic group of characters who open up Cassie's world in ways she never anticipated. But she's still struggling with being perfect and trying to get Ben to forgive her.
Cassie's lack of experience with the 2SLGBTQIA+ community creates learning opportunities that are given grace and humor, which is so refreshing. For example, three people in the GSA have each other do push-ups when they accidentally use the wrong pronouns for someone. They make corrections and laugh. Situations like this create such a welcoming, loving community that lingers long after the last page of the novel.
Many thanks to the publisher and NetGalley for digital ARC.
Cassie is an excellent, messy main character. She makes big mistakes, she makes assumptions, she creates issues and it's so fantastic to read a protagonist who makes messes. To be fair, Cassie doesn't mean to make mistakes or messes; these things happen because she places such intense pressure on herself to be perfect. The perfect student, the perfect girl in church, the perfect daughter... This pressure even caused her to betray her best friend Ben when they were very young. Then he moved away.
Now that Ben's moved back, Cassie's determined to make things right with him by creating a GSA group. Her religious school won't allow it and Cassie finds herself teaming with a small group of students from the nearby high school to create an "underground" GSA group. This brings about a fantastic group of characters who open up Cassie's world in ways she never anticipated. But she's still struggling with being perfect and trying to get Ben to forgive her.
Cassie's lack of experience with the 2SLGBTQIA+ community creates learning opportunities that are given grace and humor, which is so refreshing. For example, three people in the GSA have each other do push-ups when they accidentally use the wrong pronouns for someone. They make corrections and laugh. Situations like this create such a welcoming, loving community that lingers long after the last page of the novel.
Many thanks to the publisher and NetGalley for digital ARC.
March 15, 2025
Cassie Herera studies at a Catholic high school in Canada, and she's a model student in every way: teachers love her because she's not only an excellent student academically, but she's always willing to help; the same goes for church. But she messed up big time a few years earlier when she failed to stand up for her best friend Ben, who was being bullied by peers at their conservative school for his apparent non-conformity to gender norms. Now that Ben is back in town and enrolled in her high school, Cassie is determined to prove that she's no longer the person who allowed that happen, she knows now how to be a good ally. So she teams up with some new friends from a much more progressive public school across the street and starts an underground gender and sexuality club - just to make it up to Ben, of course.
For a change, here's a YA title with a contemporary realistic setting that's not about the senior year of high school, when the protagonists have to decide what to do with their lives after graduation and where to apply to college. Not that I have anything against that, but there are other years in the life of a teenager.
I liked this one a lot. Cassie's POV - how she, burdened by other people's expectations or her own perfectionism, sets herself on a course where she will mess up. And how looking outside the neat boxes society has prepared for you is a precarious but inevitable step to actually finding yourself. There's a lot here about how a community that is conservative specifically because of its religious affiliation can impose gender roles, and how challenging it can be to balance your religion and your sexuality - but those struggles will also be super-recognizable to those who have experienced how unwelcome your explorations of gender and sexuality can be in communities that tend to limit this for non-religious reasons. I also liked that the story is really nuanced. It's not a blanket protest against everything Cassie's upbringing has to offer. Both her church affiliation and her academic excellence are really important to her. Instead of bluntly rejecting the "old" values when she discovers the "new" ones, she's deeply conflicted - and, of course, she backs herself into a corner, as always happens when you're as perfectionist as she is.
Highly recommended.
Publication date April 1, 2025.
I am grateful to the publisher for providing me with an eARC of this title through NetGalley. The review above is my own opinion.
For a change, here's a YA title with a contemporary realistic setting that's not about the senior year of high school, when the protagonists have to decide what to do with their lives after graduation and where to apply to college. Not that I have anything against that, but there are other years in the life of a teenager.
I liked this one a lot. Cassie's POV - how she, burdened by other people's expectations or her own perfectionism, sets herself on a course where she will mess up. And how looking outside the neat boxes society has prepared for you is a precarious but inevitable step to actually finding yourself. There's a lot here about how a community that is conservative specifically because of its religious affiliation can impose gender roles, and how challenging it can be to balance your religion and your sexuality - but those struggles will also be super-recognizable to those who have experienced how unwelcome your explorations of gender and sexuality can be in communities that tend to limit this for non-religious reasons. I also liked that the story is really nuanced. It's not a blanket protest against everything Cassie's upbringing has to offer. Both her church affiliation and her academic excellence are really important to her. Instead of bluntly rejecting the "old" values when she discovers the "new" ones, she's deeply conflicted - and, of course, she backs herself into a corner, as always happens when you're as perfectionist as she is.
Highly recommended.
Publication date April 1, 2025.
I am grateful to the publisher for providing me with an eARC of this title through NetGalley. The review above is my own opinion.
January 17, 2025
Thank you Harper Collins and Netgalley for this eARC, these opinions are my own. So good! Cassie, a junior at a private catholic school, strives to uphold the perfection that everyone has come to expect from her. But when her former best friend, Ben, returns to the school her world is about to be turned upside down. Ben left their school after a bullying incident and Cassie struggles with guilt over the fact that she didn’t do enough to prevent it. To make it up to Ben she starts an underground Gender and Sexuality Alliance group at her school with help from a neighboring school. In this group she gets a freedom e she’s never had before and the ability to explore who she is. But how will this impact the perfection she’s strived for? I loved the character development in Messy Perfect! I liked that what Cassie’s going through is so relatable and a great read for anyone who has struggled with queerness and religion! It’ll have you in your feels and going through all the emotions with Cassie! A great story about finding one’s self and how that connects to the world around you!
April 5, 2025
*4.5 Stars*
I was provided an ARC via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.
This was a very good story. I liked the main character. She was very messy (duh) and I loved seeing her grow and change throughout the book. I do feel she was treated a bit unfairly at some point but it was such a good story. I really enjoyed the environnement and the idea of this underground club. The main character also gave me secondhand anxiety with her insane schedule but that was definitely part of the experience. I just really liked this story, the message, the characters. I read it quite fast, the plot kept me hanging to the page. I would definitely recommend this and will read more books by Tanya Boteju in the future.
I was provided an ARC via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.
This was a very good story. I liked the main character. She was very messy (duh) and I loved seeing her grow and change throughout the book. I do feel she was treated a bit unfairly at some point but it was such a good story. I really enjoyed the environnement and the idea of this underground club. The main character also gave me secondhand anxiety with her insane schedule but that was definitely part of the experience. I just really liked this story, the message, the characters. I read it quite fast, the plot kept me hanging to the page. I would definitely recommend this and will read more books by Tanya Boteju in the future.
March 3, 2025
This is an essential book for teens with religious backgrounds to read, especially if they are queer or have queer friends. I'd even say it's pretty important for non-religious people (like me) to read because it gives significant insight into what it's like to be queer and Catholic and feel all this pressure to be the perfect, (straight), devout kid.
Although it was painful to read about how stressed and supremely messy Cassie was in this book, I liked the way things turned out for her. The gay panic throughout was on point.
CW: Religion, homophobia
Thank you to NetGalley and publisher for the opporunity to read and review.
Although it was painful to read about how stressed and supremely messy Cassie was in this book, I liked the way things turned out for her. The gay panic throughout was on point.
CW: Religion, homophobia
Thank you to NetGalley and publisher for the opporunity to read and review.
Shelved as 'dnf'
April 4, 2025I am DNFing this, but not because it isn't good. I will definitely be purchasing it for my school library for my students. However I'm just kind of bored, and I pretty much feel like I know what is going to happen. Every time I think it might be something unexpected, I kind of just get what I expected. But not in a bad way, again, just not in a way that I need to keep reading it.
April 11, 2025
I always love reading about gays with religious trauma
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