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592 pages, Kindle Edition
First published September 1, 2015
“You got good, you don’t let it go. It lets you go, you hold on. It slips though your fingers, you pull out all the stops to get it back. You got somethin� worth fighting for, you fight for it. You do not sit on your ass waitin� for it to come back to you."
I ate shit because that was life.
But in all that, I’d done something right. Something so right, it was the anchor of my life that kept me steady and whole� I’d made [my son]. I’d kept [my son]. And I made sure my boy knew he was loved right down to my soul. Which meant he loved me that way right back.
“You know I love you, baby?� I whispered.
“I don’t think I gotta convince you that you mean something� to me. What I want you to know right now is, no mater the future, that’ll never change."
“Got a lotta people who mean a lot to me, but only one took my back� What I want is more good times with you. I wanna fuck wild and I wanna laugh hard, and while we’re doin� that, I’m gonna look out for you.�
“You should be a therapist, Mike. Open your own clinic. Call it ‘Don’t Be A Dumb Fuck Treatment Centre.�
Mike grinned back, returning, “You bein� my first client, thinkin� of adding, ‘How Not To Be A Smartass.'�
“We got a lot to talk about� But I don’t want you dreading it, because, honest as fuck, we’re gonna get through it and we’re gonna get past it. I won’t make you promises again that I can’t keep. Swear that, babe. So when I promise right now that I know where my head is at with you and I want us both to give this the best shot we can give it, you can believe that."
God.
“You gonna give this the best shot you can give, sweetheart?� he asked�
I nodded.
He took in my nod, smiled a small smile, but pushed, “Promise me.�
� “I promise, honey.�
It happens. For people like us, baby. It happens, eventually. Just as long as we hold on.
The only thing I know is, what's at the end of the road we're on is unknown. Along the way, I break through that fortress you've built around you and manage to extract your head from your ass, it'll be worth the trip.
Need you to get this, Cher. I wanna kiss you. But right now, I wanna kiss you because you're standin' in my arms, lookin' up at me the way you're lookin' up at me. I definitely wanna kiss the girl who loves to make me laugh. And I wanna kiss the girl who put that dress on for me. I also wanna kiss you because after I kiss you, I'm gonna take you to my bed and I'm gonna fuck you. But you need to know, in this instant, I wanna kiss you because you're the girl you are right now, the way you are right now, lookin' up at me."
“You got good, you don’t let it go. It lets you go, you hold on. It slips though your fingers, you pull out all the stops to get it back. You got somethin� worth fighting for, you fight for it. You do not sit on your ass waitin� for it to come back to you.�
“Hold on tight, Cherie� don’t let go.�
“I never went soft. I was all hard. I’d built a shell around me no one could crack. I had reason. A really fucking good reason.
Problem was, I built that shell so hard, even I couldn’t break out of it.�
“I wanna kiss you. But right now, I wanna kiss you because you're standin' in my arms, lookin' up at me the way you're lookin' up at me. I definitely wanna kiss the girl who loves to make me laugh. And I wanna kiss the girl who put that dress on for me. I also wanna kiss you because after I kiss you, I'm gonna take you to my bed and I'm gonna fuck you. But you need to know, in this instant, I wanna kiss you because you're the girl you are right now, the way you are right now, lookin' up at me."
"Made you come for me," he whispered.
"More than once."
Her bedroom said anything goes. Her bedroom said your wildest fantasy could come true.
"Christ, if I didn't know you were worth it, I'd walk out the door and this would be done - all we got, over."
"Don't believe in ghosts but evidence points to the fact that the spirit of Janis Joplin puked all over your pad."
"Hey Joe."
"For people like us, baby. It happens, eventually. Just as long as we hold on.
His thick cock was rock hard. Fuck yeah.
"You really over Mia?"
"It's an uncomfortable feeling, kickin' your own ass for years, knowin' you let go the only woman you loved and knowin' you should've pulled out all the stops to get her back, then switchin' that on a dime to kickin' you own ass when you realize she wasn't worth that emotion."
"Did he know that he was the dream come true a girl like me would never dare to dream?"
"I definitely wanna kiss the girl who loves to make me laugh. And I wanna kiss the girl who put that dress on for me. I also wanna kiss you because after I kiss you, I'm gonna take you to my bed and I'm gonna fuck you. But you need to know, in this instant, I wanna kiss you because you're the girl you are right now, the way you are now, lookin' up at me."
“You got good, you don’t let it go. It lets you go, you hold on. It slips through your fingers, you pull out all the stops to get it back. You got somethin� worth fighting for, you fight for it. You do not sit on your ass waitin� for it to come back to you.�
“Hold on tight, Cherie� Don’t let go.�
“I was the kind of girl who’d never dreamed because, even when I was little, I always knew I was the kind of girl who’d be stupid to dream.�
“A man who liked me. A man who laughed at my jokes. A man who smiled at me regularly. Who teased me often. Who shot the shit with me. A man who liked me a lot. A man who was my friend. A man who thought of me as a friend. The man I loved more than breath.�
“You got good, you don’t let it go. It lets you go, you hold on. It slips through your fingers, you pull out all the stops to get it back. You got somethin� worth fighting for, you fight for it. You do not sit on your ass waitin� for it to come back to you. You show whoever that is they mean something and you go all out on that, and the only way you go down is doin� that shit swinging.�
“It wasn’t walking out of a house into a taxi or your car in your clothes from the night before that was the walk of shame. You wanted what you wanted, you went after it, you got it, then you left it and went on with your life. There was no shame in that. None. The shame was lying naked in your own bed listening to a man be quiet while dressing because he woke up next to you not wanting one thing to do with you.�
“� he’d never give me what I wanted. I forgot. I forgot I wasn’t the kind of girl who got what she wanted. Not once. Not in my whole f*cking life. Yeah, I’d forgotten that.�
“What I want is more good times with you, Cher. I wanna f*ck wild and I wanna laugh hard, and while we’re doin� that, I’m gonna look out for you. More, I can’t promise.�
“That’s life. You have no clue what you’ll get along the journey. But you won’t get dick you stay in one place, spinning your wheels.�
“God, did he know? Did he know that he was the dream come true a girl like me would never dare to dream?�
"One of us is gonna be breathless, brown eyes, that's a guarantee."
“Hold on tight, Cherie� Don’t let go.�
“What I want is more good times with you, Cher. I wanna fuck wild and I wanna laugh hard, and while we’re doin� that, I’m gonna look out for you.�
“It happens,� he replied. “What happens?� she asked. He dipped closer and held her tighter. “It happens,� he repeated. “For people like us, baby. It happens, eventually. Just as long as we hold on.�
I forgot. I forgot I wasn't the kind of girl who got what she wanted.
"Maybe, you let the door to that fortress you built around you open an inch, I can get in and you'll find I do know fuck all about what's going' on in your head, I give a shit about you, and I wanna see you let it go and find yourself some happy."
"That doesn't happen for girls like me, Merry."
"Storms get me the blowjob, brown eyes. I get the intel you need, that buys me sinkin' deep in wet pussy."
“You look good. There’s no better ass in a pair of jeans in the entire county and it’s mine to tap.�
"If I didn't know you were worth it."