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A FIX OF LIGHT
A trans love story with a dark magical twist, from an astonishing new Irish voice.
Be careful. The dark is listening.
Hanan is supposed to be dead.
The forest outside Skenashogue sent him home alive - but changed. A strange new magic makes every emotion a physical force he can't control.
Bright and gentle, fox-like Pax is everything Hanan is not. And when he touches Hanan he mutes his secret power, quiets the curse.
To survive their own darknesses they'll need to be honest with each other. But Hanan isn't sure Pax will like what he finds out...
Can their love help them find their way back to the light?
Be careful. The dark is listening.
Hanan is supposed to be dead.
The forest outside Skenashogue sent him home alive - but changed. A strange new magic makes every emotion a physical force he can't control.
Bright and gentle, fox-like Pax is everything Hanan is not. And when he touches Hanan he mutes his secret power, quiets the curse.
To survive their own darknesses they'll need to be honest with each other. But Hanan isn't sure Pax will like what he finds out...
Can their love help them find their way back to the light?
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Displaying 1 - 10 of 10 reviews
January 6, 2025
As an Irish book blogger, I’m always interested in books set in Ireland, particularly those which draw on Irish folklore and mythology, so I was glad to have the opportunity to read Kel Menton’s debut YA novel and for it to be my first ARC review for my blog. A Fix of Light is a powerful story featuring a budding romance between two queer protagonists as they grapple with their inner demons which manifest in magical ways.
Whilst this book is unquestionably heartfelt and uplifting, the early pages give fair warning that the book deals with serious themes such as suicide, self-harm, and homophobic and transphobic hate speech, however, it’s a testament to Menton’s writing that they can deal with these themes while leaving the reader feeling optimistic and upbeat about the future by the end.
I couldn’t help but be invested in the characters created by Menton, particularly our heroes Hannan and Pax.
Hannan, who is in his late teens, grapples with his mental health which bubbles up in supernatural ways. Menton cleverly links Hannan’s struggles controlling his magic to his struggles controlling is mental health, giving the reader a visual of what Hannan goes through.
But there’s more to Hannan than his mental health. His character arc proves that while Hannan makes mistakes, his heart is in the right place, particularly when it comes to caring about Pax.
Pax, or as Hannan refers to him as “the fox�, is a bright light which shines through Hannan’s darkness. When Pax is near, Hannan’s magic calms and he feels more in control. That’s not to say Pax doesn’t have problems, he definitely does, but their relationship reveals both characters are stronger than they know.
In terms of writing, Menton can drop the reader in any setting and make them feel like they’re there. They have a talent for taking those slow moments, cycling down a country road or sitting in a café, and making you feel like you’re sharing those experiences with the character. The story ebbs and flows nicely between intense scenes and heartfelt moments keeping the story engaging.
Menton rolls out the magic gradually throughout the story and draws on Irish folklore in interesting ways. I don’t want to say too much about it because discovering the magic’s source is part of the mystery, however, Menton makes for satisfying pay offs.
I very much enjoyed this book, and I will be keeping an eye on what Menton writes next.
See this review on my blog:
Whilst this book is unquestionably heartfelt and uplifting, the early pages give fair warning that the book deals with serious themes such as suicide, self-harm, and homophobic and transphobic hate speech, however, it’s a testament to Menton’s writing that they can deal with these themes while leaving the reader feeling optimistic and upbeat about the future by the end.
I couldn’t help but be invested in the characters created by Menton, particularly our heroes Hannan and Pax.
Hannan, who is in his late teens, grapples with his mental health which bubbles up in supernatural ways. Menton cleverly links Hannan’s struggles controlling his magic to his struggles controlling is mental health, giving the reader a visual of what Hannan goes through.
But there’s more to Hannan than his mental health. His character arc proves that while Hannan makes mistakes, his heart is in the right place, particularly when it comes to caring about Pax.
Pax, or as Hannan refers to him as “the fox�, is a bright light which shines through Hannan’s darkness. When Pax is near, Hannan’s magic calms and he feels more in control. That’s not to say Pax doesn’t have problems, he definitely does, but their relationship reveals both characters are stronger than they know.
In terms of writing, Menton can drop the reader in any setting and make them feel like they’re there. They have a talent for taking those slow moments, cycling down a country road or sitting in a café, and making you feel like you’re sharing those experiences with the character. The story ebbs and flows nicely between intense scenes and heartfelt moments keeping the story engaging.
Menton rolls out the magic gradually throughout the story and draws on Irish folklore in interesting ways. I don’t want to say too much about it because discovering the magic’s source is part of the mystery, however, Menton makes for satisfying pay offs.
I very much enjoyed this book, and I will be keeping an eye on what Menton writes next.
See this review on my blog:
March 22, 2025
In this lovely coming-of-age LHBTQIA love story, two young people � both damaged by trauma � find each other and start to heal together, once they manage to let their walls down first.
Hanan is suffering from some form of mental illness similar to schizophrenia and depression/anxiety, which features self-harm and suicidal thoughts and actions. This is cleverly represented in the story by his struggles to contain and control his magic, which mirrors and manifests from his dark moods and terrifies him with what might happen as a result � magical thinking brought to terrible reality. Pax is trans and has been physically and emotionally beaten down by family and peers due to his identity and sexuality, and has some hidden magical talents of his own. So, these aren’t light topics that are explored and this is not a romcom � you can expect some violence, physical and sexual, and emotional abuse, but none of it between the two main characters, who provide genuine love and support for each other throughout.
This story brings to light all of the pain, heartbreak and drama of first teen love, with the added struggles of personal identity, persecution, unhealed trauma and damaged mental health. It is a love story of two beaten, but not broken, young souls finding each other and facing their individual darkness to walk together towards a lighter future.
Those who enjoy diverse love stories with lots of emotional journeying and some fae fantasy and folklore on the side will really enjoy having their heart broken and mended by this book, and it is an ideal read for teens or young adults who may be facing some of the same issues as the main characters and looking for representation, understanding and acceptance.
Hanan is suffering from some form of mental illness similar to schizophrenia and depression/anxiety, which features self-harm and suicidal thoughts and actions. This is cleverly represented in the story by his struggles to contain and control his magic, which mirrors and manifests from his dark moods and terrifies him with what might happen as a result � magical thinking brought to terrible reality. Pax is trans and has been physically and emotionally beaten down by family and peers due to his identity and sexuality, and has some hidden magical talents of his own. So, these aren’t light topics that are explored and this is not a romcom � you can expect some violence, physical and sexual, and emotional abuse, but none of it between the two main characters, who provide genuine love and support for each other throughout.
This story brings to light all of the pain, heartbreak and drama of first teen love, with the added struggles of personal identity, persecution, unhealed trauma and damaged mental health. It is a love story of two beaten, but not broken, young souls finding each other and facing their individual darkness to walk together towards a lighter future.
Those who enjoy diverse love stories with lots of emotional journeying and some fae fantasy and folklore on the side will really enjoy having their heart broken and mended by this book, and it is an ideal read for teens or young adults who may be facing some of the same issues as the main characters and looking for representation, understanding and acceptance.
January 1, 2025
I received an ARC from the publisher in exchange for an honest review. It has not affected my opinions.
A FIX OF LIGHT is a dark but utterly hopeful tale of magic and inner demons.
The magical side of this book is interesting. For the first half of the book, I wasn't sure how much of the magic was real - it felt like it was a speculative sprinkle of flavouring that could have been passed off as a metaphor for how Hanan was feeling. It is not the focus of this part of the book. However, once the second half/last act is reached, the magic is very clearly real.
The magic weaves Irish folklore into the tale. It's the darker, more eldritch side of it. It never reaches horror, but it a lot of the magic is twisted and warped, a reflection of the darker emotions the boys are struggling with. In that sense, the magic does act as a very good metaphor for both of their feelings and adds depths to their journeys around self-worth and being willing and able to fight for themselves.
The book does deal with some very big, difficult topics and gets very dark at times. The prose at times feels very sparse in order to lay bare the rawness of the emotions. There's little hiding in this book! The writing also manages to evoke the disconnect between Hanan and the world at the start, the sense that he's floating through it, struggling to find a reason to engage and live.
As well as Hanan and Pax's perspectives, I really liked the scenes from George. She is not a major POV compared to the boys, but I appreciated seeing her side of things. She loves Pax in a fierce, sisterly manner - exasperated and protective all at once. She's such a big figure in his life that it was nice to see her view on the pair of them.
A FIX OF LIGHT is a dark but utterly hopeful tale of magic and inner demons.
The magical side of this book is interesting. For the first half of the book, I wasn't sure how much of the magic was real - it felt like it was a speculative sprinkle of flavouring that could have been passed off as a metaphor for how Hanan was feeling. It is not the focus of this part of the book. However, once the second half/last act is reached, the magic is very clearly real.
The magic weaves Irish folklore into the tale. It's the darker, more eldritch side of it. It never reaches horror, but it a lot of the magic is twisted and warped, a reflection of the darker emotions the boys are struggling with. In that sense, the magic does act as a very good metaphor for both of their feelings and adds depths to their journeys around self-worth and being willing and able to fight for themselves.
The book does deal with some very big, difficult topics and gets very dark at times. The prose at times feels very sparse in order to lay bare the rawness of the emotions. There's little hiding in this book! The writing also manages to evoke the disconnect between Hanan and the world at the start, the sense that he's floating through it, struggling to find a reason to engage and live.
As well as Hanan and Pax's perspectives, I really liked the scenes from George. She is not a major POV compared to the boys, but I appreciated seeing her side of things. She loves Pax in a fierce, sisterly manner - exasperated and protective all at once. She's such a big figure in his life that it was nice to see her view on the pair of them.
March 23, 2025
I received a copy of the book from the publisher in exchange for an honest review. It has in no way influenced my opinion.
This book is both depressing and hopeful, dark and light, with two queer boys at its centre providing the heart. The quote on the cover says that it will break your heart and heal it and I wholeheartedly agree.
Hanan has been sent back from death changed, dealing with new powers linked to his mental health and troubled past when he meets Pax. The two embark on a journey of discovery, magic and love attempting to understand what is happening to Hanan whilst negotiating the growing feelings developing between them. This book is stunningly written. Descriptions make the setting leap off the page and the emotions run deep through you.
This book is both depressing and hopeful, dark and light, with two queer boys at its centre providing the heart. The quote on the cover says that it will break your heart and heal it and I wholeheartedly agree.
Hanan has been sent back from death changed, dealing with new powers linked to his mental health and troubled past when he meets Pax. The two embark on a journey of discovery, magic and love attempting to understand what is happening to Hanan whilst negotiating the growing feelings developing between them. This book is stunningly written. Descriptions make the setting leap off the page and the emotions run deep through you.
February 24, 2025
Absolutely breathtaking, sincere, gorgeous, and heartfelt. Couldn't put it down.
February 12, 2025
Slayed, finished in three days could barley put it down. The writing was so vivid I could feel as though I sank into the world of Hanan and pax. They were so adorable. A truly magical book I can’t wait to see what kel writes next
February 20, 2025
The plot
Our book opens with a prologue, and us discovering a boy has taken himself off to a large and forgotten wood with the intent of taking his own life. Having done the deed, he lets the blood flow and asks that they let him rest there in peace.
Hanan is our protagonist, and we catch up with him as he is poised to enter a local cafe in a seaside town not far from Cork, Ireland, called Skenashogue. He is the boy in the wood, the boy that died in the wood, but didn't.
How he came to survive the incident, he does not know, but the experience has left him with something he cannot quite fathom or control. When Hanan is sad, things around him darken. The greater the depth of the despair, the worse things happen. Angry wasps physically attack the windows of his mother's cottage where he lives. Flowers wilt and die. Even the shadows draw in, wishing to attack and overwhelm him and the area he is in. But, when he is happy, flowers bloom brighter, the sun shines more, and clouds just disappear. Others haven't caught onto the connection between Hanan and the happenings.
After he is scalded and cut during an accident in the cafe, he falls for a boy who caused the event and takes him home when he collapses. As the boy's hands touch Hanan, he feels the darkness of the world he lives in and is tormented by, lift. His heart brightened and he felt once more alive. It is such an intense sensation, one he does not wish to lose and craves more of.
Pax is that boy, and he has his own tale to tell. He has undergone surgery to become the outward boy he always knew he should have been. His father, however, sees him as a monster and freakish daughter, and Pax has suffered viciously at the hands of his drunken and bigoted parent. So much so that he now lives in the village with his aunt May, who reads tarot cards and such.
Their adventure begins when the two boys stumble into each other late one evening at Hanan's favourite spot to be alone, a secret cove. The two boys start to see more of each other. But twists and turns and derailments hinder their progress. Doubts on each boy's part as to what the other wants, if they like them, or as in Hanan's case, whether he will only bring trouble and hurt on Pax (and drive him away) and himself, define the story.
With each boy having a past, demons if you will, something that hurts or haunts them, it was never going to be easy. Given the potential Hanan has to cause damage and pain, he thinks he is acting for the best when he runs away from an impromptu kiss with Pax.
Pax, though, is left confused and frustrated. Is this just another person who has raised his hopes only to break his already fragile heart? Both can be seen by the reader to be in love, yet caught up in very real emotional, physical and cognitive dilemmas that keep them apart, willingly or not. When demons, both physical and fay, start to come home to roost, this tale shows its strength and shines.
I was utterly captivated by this tale. Never have the characters felt more personal, their plight and situation so real, so very human and of this age. Beautifully crafted, it is at times brutal, brutally frank, and savage. And at other times, it is heartbreaking, magical, then bounces to joyous. The writer has crafted something so deeply personal, so emotional, and yet it is not about them.
It is as delicately spun as gossamer threads and yet also so very strong, cohesive and as intricately woven. What drives this tale is the essence of love and friendship, of making errors on the road. Overcoming adversity in the face of so much pressure and undeniable evil that lurks in some minds and expressed by those that are all too prevalent in the news, creates the darker side of this story.
The fantasy element comes from as much of who our two lead characters are deep within, their essence, as the fay and magic that they encounter. It was not overplayed and slipped easily into the story once revealed and plays delicately through to the end.
It was a delight to see Hanan and Pax come into their own, separately and then finally, together. The journey they each have is unique and spellbinding. Because of the way the story unfolds, which is delightful, the truth of each player's life and background is released and realised slowly. The pace is never slow but gathers speed towards a dramatic conclusion that really has the reader turning the page.
A joyous, delicious, emotional ride that had us on tenterhooks. It will tear you apart, patch you together only to be torn apart in another way. And I wouldn't have had this story any other way, and I'm so glad that I saw this.
Our book opens with a prologue, and us discovering a boy has taken himself off to a large and forgotten wood with the intent of taking his own life. Having done the deed, he lets the blood flow and asks that they let him rest there in peace.
Hanan is our protagonist, and we catch up with him as he is poised to enter a local cafe in a seaside town not far from Cork, Ireland, called Skenashogue. He is the boy in the wood, the boy that died in the wood, but didn't.
How he came to survive the incident, he does not know, but the experience has left him with something he cannot quite fathom or control. When Hanan is sad, things around him darken. The greater the depth of the despair, the worse things happen. Angry wasps physically attack the windows of his mother's cottage where he lives. Flowers wilt and die. Even the shadows draw in, wishing to attack and overwhelm him and the area he is in. But, when he is happy, flowers bloom brighter, the sun shines more, and clouds just disappear. Others haven't caught onto the connection between Hanan and the happenings.
After he is scalded and cut during an accident in the cafe, he falls for a boy who caused the event and takes him home when he collapses. As the boy's hands touch Hanan, he feels the darkness of the world he lives in and is tormented by, lift. His heart brightened and he felt once more alive. It is such an intense sensation, one he does not wish to lose and craves more of.
Pax is that boy, and he has his own tale to tell. He has undergone surgery to become the outward boy he always knew he should have been. His father, however, sees him as a monster and freakish daughter, and Pax has suffered viciously at the hands of his drunken and bigoted parent. So much so that he now lives in the village with his aunt May, who reads tarot cards and such.
Their adventure begins when the two boys stumble into each other late one evening at Hanan's favourite spot to be alone, a secret cove. The two boys start to see more of each other. But twists and turns and derailments hinder their progress. Doubts on each boy's part as to what the other wants, if they like them, or as in Hanan's case, whether he will only bring trouble and hurt on Pax (and drive him away) and himself, define the story.
With each boy having a past, demons if you will, something that hurts or haunts them, it was never going to be easy. Given the potential Hanan has to cause damage and pain, he thinks he is acting for the best when he runs away from an impromptu kiss with Pax.
Pax, though, is left confused and frustrated. Is this just another person who has raised his hopes only to break his already fragile heart? Both can be seen by the reader to be in love, yet caught up in very real emotional, physical and cognitive dilemmas that keep them apart, willingly or not. When demons, both physical and fay, start to come home to roost, this tale shows its strength and shines.
I was utterly captivated by this tale. Never have the characters felt more personal, their plight and situation so real, so very human and of this age. Beautifully crafted, it is at times brutal, brutally frank, and savage. And at other times, it is heartbreaking, magical, then bounces to joyous. The writer has crafted something so deeply personal, so emotional, and yet it is not about them.
It is as delicately spun as gossamer threads and yet also so very strong, cohesive and as intricately woven. What drives this tale is the essence of love and friendship, of making errors on the road. Overcoming adversity in the face of so much pressure and undeniable evil that lurks in some minds and expressed by those that are all too prevalent in the news, creates the darker side of this story.
The fantasy element comes from as much of who our two lead characters are deep within, their essence, as the fay and magic that they encounter. It was not overplayed and slipped easily into the story once revealed and plays delicately through to the end.
It was a delight to see Hanan and Pax come into their own, separately and then finally, together. The journey they each have is unique and spellbinding. Because of the way the story unfolds, which is delightful, the truth of each player's life and background is released and realised slowly. The pace is never slow but gathers speed towards a dramatic conclusion that really has the reader turning the page.
A joyous, delicious, emotional ride that had us on tenterhooks. It will tear you apart, patch you together only to be torn apart in another way. And I wouldn't have had this story any other way, and I'm so glad that I saw this.
February 2, 2025
An interesting read with some of the same vibes as The Wicker King by K. Ancrum, but if the magic was real.
This book was dark and heavy-hitting but with a hopeful ending.
I liked the fae rep in this and found it to be a very fast read. So, all good things.
The writing itself wasn't a huge hit for me personally, but I can definitely see how others would enjoy it.
This book was dark and heavy-hitting but with a hopeful ending.
I liked the fae rep in this and found it to be a very fast read. So, all good things.
The writing itself wasn't a huge hit for me personally, but I can definitely see how others would enjoy it.
April 9, 2025
Ugh this was SO great.
The love story, the representation, the Cork references, the Gaeilge ‼️ Excellent.
The love story, the representation, the Cork references, the Gaeilge ‼️ Excellent.
January 21, 2025
A Fix of Light was gorgeous and heart-breaking in equal measure. Menton’s prose had a way of pulling you in and weaving the story around you.
This is quite a character-focused story and luckily our protagonists are wonderful. Hannan and Pax are two teenagers trying to find their feet in a complex and sometimes hateful world, drawn together by forces they do not fully comprehend initially. I loved watching them develop and grow, making mistakes and learning from them. They were messy and all the more authentic in that. Their dynamic is a wonderful spot of light amidst the tougher moments, though it is not plain sailing. Parts of it reminded me of Heartstopper in the way Oseman can make your heart sing despite darker stories, but transposed to Ireland with fantasy aspects.
I really enjoyed the use of speculative elements. They weave in aspects of Irish folklore in a beautiful way that enhances the characters and deepens the emotional impact surrounding the central theme. It feels like such a rich way of adding to the landscape of the book. This is not the lighter magic you may be used to � it is darker and has proper bite. It is spikier, with teeth that it is prepared to use. That anger and darkness fits wonderfully though and twists the narrative in interesting ways. It mirrors the emotional beats of the plot, while keeping an element of hope hidden within.
This is a tricky read in parts, delving into difficult topics, so do check content warnings before starting. It is brutally honest in its darkness and done in a way that feels respectful and nuanced. The political landscape surrounding these topics is more perilous every day and the monstrosity of humanity is on full display here.
A Fix of Light is ultimately a story of hope � the light after the storm has passed.
CW: transphobia, homophobia, body dysmorphia, deadnaming, sexual assault, rape, suicidal ideation
This is quite a character-focused story and luckily our protagonists are wonderful. Hannan and Pax are two teenagers trying to find their feet in a complex and sometimes hateful world, drawn together by forces they do not fully comprehend initially. I loved watching them develop and grow, making mistakes and learning from them. They were messy and all the more authentic in that. Their dynamic is a wonderful spot of light amidst the tougher moments, though it is not plain sailing. Parts of it reminded me of Heartstopper in the way Oseman can make your heart sing despite darker stories, but transposed to Ireland with fantasy aspects.
I really enjoyed the use of speculative elements. They weave in aspects of Irish folklore in a beautiful way that enhances the characters and deepens the emotional impact surrounding the central theme. It feels like such a rich way of adding to the landscape of the book. This is not the lighter magic you may be used to � it is darker and has proper bite. It is spikier, with teeth that it is prepared to use. That anger and darkness fits wonderfully though and twists the narrative in interesting ways. It mirrors the emotional beats of the plot, while keeping an element of hope hidden within.
This is a tricky read in parts, delving into difficult topics, so do check content warnings before starting. It is brutally honest in its darkness and done in a way that feels respectful and nuanced. The political landscape surrounding these topics is more perilous every day and the monstrosity of humanity is on full display here.
A Fix of Light is ultimately a story of hope � the light after the storm has passed.
CW: transphobia, homophobia, body dysmorphia, deadnaming, sexual assault, rape, suicidal ideation
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