This easy-to-use guide helps parents increase cooperation and reduce conflict in households with children ages two through 12. Parents learn how to eliminate the tantrums, teasing, dawdling, interrupting, and complaining that drive them crazy.
I don't have any criticisms of this book other than perhaps at this point it is a lot of info that is covered in a lot of other books. But that is now, and this was written then, and it is all absolutely still pertinent. It's a great book, well-organized, with practical and solid advice that is good for those of us who need a review.
The techniques in this book are broken down into very easy to understand steps. It鈥檚 very logical. There was nothing ground breaking to me but the fact it stands up after 25 years is a testament to it being good advice (some other books I鈥檝e read from this era not so much).
The advice spans a wide range of ages (2-18) which could be a benefit or not. For me (as the parent of a young toddler) a lot of it isn鈥檛 relevant... yet.
Not all parents will find this to be all they need, but every parent needs to know how to praise in the way described in this book. You will learn how to praise in a manner that will change behavior. Praise might seem easy and obvious, but there is a skill to it. It is not only a matter of phrasing, but also timing. Within 3 days of using the methods from this book I noticed changes.
I'll share the basic premise. You categorize your child's behaviors into desirable (getting dressed, saying thank you), undesirable (annoying behaviors such as whining, talking back), and intolerable (harmful behaviors such as hitting, riding bike into the street). You praise the desirable, ignore the undesirable, and punish the intolerable. However, I do disagree to some extent on the ignoring strategy. There are times when our child is behaving poorly because they desperately need our attention and ignoring them could make them feel insecure. Learn to know your child and try to look at the emotions driving their behavior. And when you punish be sure to let them know you love them to pieces even when you don't like their choices.
If you are a parent please take some time to read this book. It will boost their confidence, give your child a better sense of how to please you, and ultimately enhance your relationship with your child.
And always remember the positive to negative interaction ratio in any relationship should be 10:1!
This was a good book that I'd seen another friend read. I checked it out from the library but it seems like it could be a good book to have handy as a reference when behaviors you don't like come up. I'm especially thinking that the twins will take a little more effort to control than Cash. :)It also made me happy to see that we were already doing quite a few of the things this book suggests, and I like that you don't have to have constant time-outs to get the behavior you want.
The book was broken up into easily digestable chapters and sections and had a quick reference at the back. Her overall theory is that attention of any form tacks a behavior into place; therefore, you praise behaviors you want more of, ignore the ones you dislike and take action for behaviors that are intolerable.
This is a truly helpful book for dealing with kids starting with the terrible twos into the teens. It has some very good techniques, but it's also about changing your perspective of your child's behavior. It's a pretty short read, though you're encouraged to read a little, practice what you learned for a while and then read more so if you do it right it still takes a while to get all the way through. I highly recommend this book for any parents, teachers or child-care providers.