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413 pages, Paperback
First published February 2, 1998
“It’s funny. When you leave your home and wander really far, you always think, ‘I want to go home.� But then you come home, and of course it’s not the same. You can’t live with it, you can’t live away from it. And it seems like from then on there’s always this yearning for some place that doesn’t exist. I felt that. Still do. I’m never completely at home anywhere. But it’s a good place to be, I think. It’s like floating. From up above, you can see everything at once. It’s the only way how.�
“Strange as it may sound, there was safety in this pantomime. The less I behaved like myself, the more I could believe that this was still a game. That my real self � Birdie Lee � was safely hidden my beige flesh, and that when the right moment came, I would reveal her, preserved, frozen solid in the moment in which I had left her.�