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152 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 2000
鈥nd now he鈥檚 coming out, while Marta his mother screams in pain, out into the cold world and there he鈥檒l be alone, separated from Marta, separated from everyone, he鈥檒l be alone there always alone and then, after it鈥檚 all over, when his time comes, he will be dissolved and turn back into nothing and go back where he came from, from nothing to nothing, that鈥檚 the path of life, for people, animals, birds, fishes, houses, bowls, for everything that exists鈥�
鈥ut no matter how much he heated the house it never got truly warm and no matter how many lights he turned on it never got truly bright either, so as far as that went he could just as well stay in bed and put off getting up for as long as he wanted, only he couldn鈥檛 just let himself go either, he had to keep active, had to do something, or else he鈥檇 get even stiffer and woozy because no it鈥檚 been a long time since he was a young man鈥�
ll the things are normal things but they have become somehow dignified, and golden, and heavy as though they weighed much much more than themselves and at the same time had no weightWe read the tremors of a self-authored set of purpose and meaning as they wane to reveal a weightless reality upon which they were built. Fosse鈥檚 tone is not one of sorrow or fear but of simple freedom. 'he has a feeling that he will never see all of this again,' Fosse writes, 'but that it will stay in him, as what he is, as a sound鈥�' Death takes the world from Johannes, but he also takes the world with him by carrying it in his eternal memories. It creates a comforting vision of death and Johannes revisits the standardly expected places, friends and family that is most dear to him before venturing from this world.
The sea doesn鈥檛 want you, he saysThe scene recalls the biblical moment of fishermen John and Simon Peter being called by Jesus as he walks across the water and reflects Peter鈥檚 calling Johannes into death. The unknown beneath the surface is gone, all that鈥檚 left is the earth and it鈥檚 previously known wonders locked in Johannes鈥� memory.
and Peter wipes the tears away
Now all that鈥檚 left is earth, Peter says
[Olai] will be the father of a little fellow who will also be named Johannes, after his father. There is a God, yet, Olai thinks. But he is far away, and he is very close. And he is not all-knowing and not all-powerful. And it is not this God who rules over the world and humankind鈥�From here the novel progresses uninterrupted. Fosse stops the flow to punctuate the importance of the Father, both God and human fathers. Life stops at God and only begins from him. Similarly, Olai and his wife Marta are also creationary forces, the lesser gods that rule not from on high but from within the world. Beginning the novel with Olai witnessing the birth of the character who dominates the rest of the novel shows the endless flow of life from one being into another.
鈥淓l ni帽o vendr谩 al fr铆o de este mundo y aqu铆 estar谩 solo, separado de Marta, separado de todos los dem谩s, estar谩 solo aqu铆, siempre solo, y luego, cuando todo haya acabado, cuando llegue su hora, se descompondr谩 y volver谩 a la nada de la que sali贸, de la nada a la nada, ese es el curso de la vida鈥�Yo, en cambio, creo que me hubiera llevado bien con 茅l, y solo habr铆a a帽adido a sus palabras aquello que dec铆a el 铆nclito y maravilloso, el de los dedos vertiginosos, el gran portento que era Javier Krahe: 鈥淭ranquilo puedo vivirme mi historia / sabiendo que a las puertas de la gloria / mi nariz no se asoma / la muerte no me llena de tristeza / las flores que saldr谩n por mi cabeza / algo dar谩n de aro-o-ma.
Everything you love is there, and everything you don't love is not there.