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Confessions of Georgia Nicolson #1

Angus, Thongs and Full-Frontal Snogging

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There are six things very wrong with my life:

1. I have one of those under-the-skin spots that will never come to a head but lurk in a red way for the next two years.

2. It is on my nose

3. I have a three-year-old sister who may have peed somewhere in my room.

4. In fourteen days the summer hols will be over and then it will be back to Stalag 14 and Oberfuhrer Frau Simpson and her bunch of sadistic teachers.

5. I am very ugly and need to go into an ugly home.

6. I went to a party dressed as a stuffed olive.


In this wildly funny journal of a year in the life of Georgia Nicolson, British author Louise Rennison has perfectly captured the soaring joys and bottomless angst of being a teenager. In the spirit of Bridget Jones's Diary, this fresh, irreverent, and simply hilarious book will leave you laughing out loud. As Georgia would say, it's "Fabbity fab fab!"

247 pages, Hardcover

First published June 24, 1999

878 people are currently reading
52.1k people want to read

About the author

Louise Rennison

83books2,756followers
Louise Rennison was the bestselling award-winning author of the phenomenally successful ‘Confessions of Georgia Nicolson� series, translated into over 34 languages and to the stage and big screen as ‘Angus, Thongs and Perfect Snogging�. She has won the Nestle Smarties Book Prize, the Michael L. Printz Honor Book and the Roald Dahl Funny prize for ‘Withering Tights�. Louise sadly died on February 29, 2016.

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5 stars
41,897 (31%)
4 stars
40,282 (29%)
3 stars
35,378 (26%)
2 stars
12,103 (8%)
1 star
5,036 (3%)
Displaying 1 - 30 of 4,940 reviews
Profile Image for Tatiana.
1,488 reviews11.3k followers
December 26, 2020
Every time I reread these books, they turn out to be offensive in more and more ways. I can’t imagine this book getting Printz Honor now. And yet, this is pure comedy gold.
__________
Update 1/2/2017 Accidentally read it yet again. Not a bad beginning-of-the-year pick-me-up.
__________


There are times when I just HAVE to read something to perk me up, something light and silly and mindless. 's books always do the trick. It doesn't hurt either that this first book in Confessions of Georgia Nicolson series is a winner of Printz Honor, proving that even the silliest story about make-up, boys, and snogging can be written brilliantly. never takes itself seriously or tries to teach some kind of moral lesson. Instead, its only aim is to provide tons of fun; and the book succeeds at it every time I read it. I do not think there is any point for me to sing this novel any more praise to convince you to give it a try, rather, I will list some quotes here for you to see if 's humor is your cup of tea.

Wednesday, December 2nd.

8:30 a.m.
Dashing out of the house, Jas and I almost fell into Mark, waiting by the corner. Jas (big pal) said she had to run to her house first and she would see me at school. I went a bit red and walked on with him walking beside me. He said, "Have you got a boyfriend?"
I was speechless. What is the right answer to that question? I tell you what the right answer is... a lie, that's the right answer. So I said, "I've just come out of a heavy thing and I'm giving myself a bit of space."
He looked at me. He really did have the biggest gob [mouth:] I have ever seen. "So is that no?"
And I just stood there and then this really weird thing happened... he touched my breast!!! I don't mean he ripped my blouse off, he just rested his hand on the front of my breast. Just for a second, before he turned and went off to school.

12:30 p.m.
What does it mean when a boy rests his hand on your breast? Does it mean he has a megahorn? Or was his hand just tired?

4:30 p.m.
Why am I even thinking about this? No sign of Mark (the breast molester) when I got home, thank goodness.

4:45 p.m.
Still, you would think if a boy rests his hand on your breast he might bother to see you sometime.

* * *

Sunday, February 7th

11:00 a.m.

Got dressed in short skirt, then me and Jas walked up and down to the main road. We wanted to see how many cars with boys in them hooted at us. Ten!! (We had to walk up and down for four hours... still, ten is ten!!!)
Profile Image for ♛ may.
832 reviews4,367 followers
December 3, 2016

So most girls, I assume, would have read this back in middle school, but *dramatically flips hair* I’m not like most girls.

^That was lame, I apologize.

Basically, the only reason I read this book is because my lovely coffee-soddened friend, Pragya, who is probably trying to get back at me for some horrible thing I did but am unaware of, convinced me to. :) :)

This book is so terrible and I feel like I probably shouldn’t be rating it, since it’s not targeted towards me, but, it’s just so bad.

The main character is the most annoying character I’ve ever read. The only thing she talks about it:
1. Her nose
2. Boys
3. How her friends are losers
4. Her nose
5. And how her life sucks so much, she wants to die

I’ve never seen a fourteen-year old act like this, this is a terrible representation of teenagers, y’all should be ashamed!

And the humour felt so forced. It wasn’t even funny.

How do people like this book???!!!

And WHY is there 10 books in the series???!! TEN BOOKS???!!!

description

So . . . I’m sorry if you’re offended, or if this book was your early teenage happiness but the only reason I wrote such a terrible review was for the crazy coffee lover I mentioned earlier.

So there, I hope you’re happy, you’ve made me do a terrible thing.


“I suppose this is what life will be like for me—never having a boyfriend, always just living through others�


1 star!!
Profile Image for Kelly (and the Book Boar).
2,759 reviews9,303 followers
September 27, 2016
Find all of my reviews at:

Meet Georgia. She’s basically a 14-year old version of this . . . .



I’m sure plenty of other reviews have and will point out that . . . .



But you know what? I still am was an asshole much like Georgia back in the day.

Angus, Thongs and Full Frontal Snogging is a year in the life of Georgia courtesy of her journal and was most definitely just what the doctor ordered for me to read on Presidential Debate Day. I never expected to laugh out loud reading the trials and tribulations of this teenie bopper, but I sure as shart did. Especially the part about her first tweezing experience . . . .



Her quest for love with an unattainable crush . . . .



And trying to get some uhhhhhhhh experience (if ya know what I’m sayin�) . . . .

“I lay on my arm until it went numb and then I lifted it (with the nonnumb arm) onto my breasts. I wanted to see what it felt like to have a strange hand on them. It was quite nice, but what do I know?�



Not to mention all of the bits with Angus . . . .



This isn’t a book that will change the world or make you smarter or want to be a better person, but hell . . .



And sometimes I just want to laugh. If you’re interested in the same, then you too might find Angus, Thongs and Full Frontal Snogging to be . . . .


Profile Image for Zoe Stewart (Zoe's All Booked).
351 reviews1,441 followers
January 1, 2022
This was just as fabbity-fab as I remember it. Oh, Georgia, you say the most ridiculous shit, and I love you more for being such a drama llama every time. She's a complete loon of a 14-year-old in every possible way. I laughed out loud every few pages. I can't wait to get to the books that I haven't read at the end of the series!
Profile Image for Navessa.
449 reviews710 followers
April 2, 2013
I recommend not reading this book in public. Or when you're on your lunch break and still in your office, or in my case cubicle. Early on there's a list in the book and in said list is the main characters' concern that her three year old sister might have peed somewhere in her room. It caught me completely off guard and while trying to block my laughter I ended up snorting so loud that the person on the other side of my cubicle wall came over to see if I needed the Heimlich maneuver.

39 reviews9 followers
June 28, 2007
Hillariosity! This is another book, from the brits, that people either love or hate. I happen to love this series, and laughed so hard I actually cried. I think people who hate this book are turned off by the main character Georgia. She is vain, self centered, hormonal, ridiculous and, I think, absolutely fabulous. This is the first of a series and we are introduced to her mad little sister libby, her feral cat Angus, her Mum and Dad, and group of silly girlfriends. It's written as a diary and a lot of people like to compare it to Bridget Jones. I have never read Bridget Jones so I can't really comment on that. I can however say that I took this book with me on a trip and illicited many curious glances from strangers in the airport. They may have thought I was having a seizure, but in fact I as laughing my bum off.
Profile Image for Becky.
1,552 reviews1,902 followers
May 21, 2015
*Sigh* I wanted fluff, not brain-damage. Based on the recommendation from several friends who loved this, I picked this up when I saw it at a library sale, and I figured that now was a good time to read it since I'd just read a duo of emotionally traumatizing books and needed something light and fun after that.

But this, aside from having a few funny moments, was mostly a 14 year old selfish angst-fest. If I was that annoying as a 14 year old, I think I may have to nominate my parents for sainthood for not murdering me. I got so bored with it by the middle that I ended up skimming most of the second half. Drama, boys, makeup, snotty fucking "sense of humor" and cattiness. Thank god I'm not a teenager anymore.

I wasn't a fan of the style of this book either. It was written in journal format, but as is often the case, it ends up being mostly 1st person. But being that Miss Georgia is a drama queen, I can forgive that. She'd want to pour her heart out. But damn it was choppy and random and the timestamps didn't make sense. I think a lot of them were supposed to be funny, like "Oh, I'm going to do this thing and it's going to make me look like a fashion model and then the Sex God will love me!" and then 2 minutes later, "My life is ruined!"

Ha ha ha. See how funny that was? Yeah. Me neither. 2 stars.
Profile Image for Kat Kennedy.
475 reviews16.4k followers
July 1, 2010
I don't have much to say about this book other than at many points this book was more than hilarious! It was hysterical!

The writing was quite good and the protagonist was interesting. She was the typical epitome of most teenage girls on the cusp between childhood and adulthood.

I felt it dragged on a bit toward the end. Over all though, it was funny, interesting and most of all, enjoyable.

Big thanks to Tatiana for recommending it to me!
Profile Image for Michelle.
1,505 reviews228 followers
October 24, 2022
Louise Rennison was right .... I laughed my knickers off!!!! Fabbity Fabby Fab!

Five stars.
Profile Image for Sara.
179 reviews189 followers
August 16, 2008
I got to the point where I couldn't read this book during silent reading time in my class, it made me laugh so hard. I'm not an easy touch for this type of humor - slapstick and outrageous. ATFFS, however, made me laugh so hard, I snorted. The epistolary nature of the narrative adds so much to the plot. A snippet about a girl who accidentally-on-purpose shaves off her eyebrows is cringingly amusing, but when it's told in five or six installments, each a few minutes apart, and that snippet weaves itself through the rest of the narrative in little comments like, "No news on the eyebrow front," there's no way to avoid laughing until your stomach aches. The fact of the matter is that Georgia is a tragic hero. You couldn't laugh so much if there wasn't something inherently tragic about her inability to enjoy life and admit it. She throws herself into frays in which it is obvious that she will be destroyed, and we cheer her on because she keeps trying. Georgia is who we want to be, because she succeeds through ridiculous perseverance. Read it and laugh, because weeping isn't far behind.
Profile Image for LaGaryce.
341 reviews24 followers
November 20, 2017
I really enjoyed this book. It was a lot of fun to read. I loved Georgia. She was snarky, funny, sarcastic
and I loved every bit of it!
Profile Image for Ellis.
442 reviews228 followers
December 21, 2014
10:34 am

I feel like yelling at him. "I am fourteen years old, Uncle Eddie! I am bursting with womanhood, I wear a bra! It's a bit on the loose side and does ride up round my neck if I run for the bus ... but the womanly potential is here, you bald coot."
Good stuff. Huh, I don't think I've ever worn a training bra. I must be an embarrassment to the sort.


10:36 am

3. I have a three-year-old sister who may have peed somewhere in my room. I miss my sister. She was supposed to come home today but apparently it's Sunday. Stupid independence shit.


10:37 am

5. I am very ugly and need to go into an ugly home. I am packing my bag right now. My sister - who still isn't here - would wholeheartedly agree with that statement. I wish she'd come home today so she would actually say it to my face. It's complicated. I miss her.


10:43 am

Hahahahahahahahaha.


10:57 am

Ugh, I'm so tired. Douchey McDouche needs to stop texting me. I don't have the energy for this. He should just get back with his girlfriend and leave me out of it.


11:09 am

Oh, wait. I did wear training bras. Eh. Probably still an embarrassment to the sort.


3:03 pm

Shit. Fell asleep with my glasses still on. Where was I? Oh yeah, shaving the eye brows with Dad's razor. Oy.


3:03 pm

Don't do it, Georgia. STAHP.


3:04 pm

Girl, you should have listened. Now step away from the eyebrow pencils.


3:05 pm

And from those friends of yours.


3:24 pm

Fuck no. Incest. Not again. Aaargh, I don't want all these books to inform me about disturbing sibling and cousinly relationships. I no longer miss my sister. Well, at least, Georgia seems to agree with me.


3:28 pm

That reminds me of the time I was biking to school and my saddle flew off. I had to do the rest of the way cycle racer style because I was already way too late. I did manage to not get a tardy because, yeah, my saddle obviously wasn't there anymore. Apparently, my French teacher had gone through something similar a few weeks before. Huh. Whadda you know.


3:32 pm

Back pain. I wish Elend were real. He'd read for me. He'd find the inner workings of the female teenage mind fascinating. Ugh, he's perfect. I want him to hug me. And more.


3:54 pm

I'm not answering that text, no matter how many smileys you send with it. I should stop listening to beautiful but depressing Dutch music. This is not good for me.


3:55 pm

What's with the Satanic rituals in here? I'm never switching to contacts, by the way. Own the nerdiness. O-O


3:57 pm

OMG, GEORGIA TALKS IN ALL CAPS TOO.


4:02 pm

I was such a wuss in secondary school.


4:03 pm

Still am.


4:23 pm

Food break.


5:16 pm

I can't believe they cancelled Bunheads. Ugh. Losers.


5:17 pm

Hahahahahahahaha.


5:19 pm

I don't like the word "snogging". The Dutch words are worse though. Sleuren, bekken, tongen, Erlack erlack. Argh, I have no idea what TTFN means. I wonder if it's dirty. She did say it to piss off her father. Oh, got it. Ta ta for now. Hm, I guess it can come across as giving attitude.


5:21 pm

Must. Not. Engage.


5:24 pm

Bookmarked.


5:25 pm

This cat should be dead. Gah, my brother is annoying. BRB.


6:07 pm

I moviod deskiod all the time.


7:03 pm

Shifty paella. Annoying family. White wine. Back pain. Can't take medication because of white wine. Urgh.


7:28

Those are a lot of steps to take before proper kissing.


7:56 pm

I need to find a stick to beat my brother with.


8:09 pm

Georgia really needs to hang out with some proper lesbians. This is just getting ridiculous.


8:26 pm

I don't think we mean the same thing when we say someone is wet. Mental horrible images of "wet" Lindsay. Must. Stop. Brain.


8:49 pm

Hm, I don't trust him, but I'm happy for Georgia. Luckily, my trusted sources have informed me that a new ship is on the horizon. *side-eyes Book #2*


8:53 pm

Huh, Anne Boleyn had Ellis-Creveld syndrome. Who knew? Hahahahahahah.


9:12 pm

This reads like a Jenna Marbles video on crack. Except ... funnier.


TTFN.
Profile Image for April (Aprilius Maximus).
1,159 reviews6,423 followers
August 8, 2020
1.) Angus, Thongs and Full-Frontal Snogging ★★★★.5
2.) It's OK, I'm Wearing Really Big Knickers ★★★★
3.) Knocked Out by my Nunga-Nungas ★★�

-----------------------------------------------

BOOK #22 READ FOR BELIEVATHON ROUND 2.

I reread this book for my video!

[trigger warnings are listed at the bottom of this review and may contain spoilers]

★★★★.5

I feel like such a hypocrite giving this such a high rating after DNFing Dear Dumb Diary when this is even more problematic than that, but I suppose we all have our problematic faves! I loved this so much. SO many laugh-out-loud moments and the characters all seemed so real and I LOVE ANGUS THE CAT MORE THAN LIFE ITSELF. Will definitely be continuing on with the series as I think I've only ever read the first 2 or 3 previously!

Now it's time to go and re-watch the ICONIC movie adaptation xD


trigger warnings: very outdated and problematic sense of humour, homophobic comments, sexist jokes, slut shaming, fatphobia, joking about mental illnesses, suicide and self-harm, mention of a 29 year old guy kissing a 13 year old girl (EW) and a 14 year old dating a 30 year old (DOUBLE EW), joking about paedophilia, incest???? Her gross cousin tries to kiss her (TRIPLE EW) and a gross incest joke about HER DAD (help), questionable comment about wheelchair users� you get the point. I'm only 90 pages in so I'm sure there'll be more but this is already too long…just� be warned.
Profile Image for Elizabeth.
277 reviews885 followers
Shelved as 'not-interested'
February 8, 2020
I've wanted to read this book since I was about 12 years old and somehow I never got around to it. Unfortunately, at 28 years of age I am well, well beyond Georgia Nicolson's target audience.

This is a very silly book that hasn't aged well. There are lot of jokes made at the expense of the LGBT community right off the bat. Which of course back then was seen as harmless, but imagine how a young struggling gay teen might feel reading Georgia's pleas of "oh God please, please don't make me have to be a lesbian like Hairy Kate." Hairy Kate! Because we all know lesbians are abominable snowmen posing as women.

Anyway Georgia is terribly boring and whiny - weren't we all? She makes a lot of jokes about suicide, how ugly she is, and how shallow her friends are (grab a mirror, babe). It's maybe exactly the way a thirteen year-old would act but it's very much an early 2000s book that I think can probably be left there. Teens need better role models than Georgia.
Profile Image for Beth.
913 reviews628 followers
Read
April 6, 2021
I'm not rating/reviewing anything from this series it was my favourite series when I was younger, I'm just reading them to get out of my slump...

Literally haven't read this series since I was a teenager. Needed something light hearted, quick and easy. This was the choice and I'm so happy I did :)
—ĔĔ�
Re-Read

It is such a laugh re-reading this, it still makes me really laugh because Georgia is just Georgia.
Profile Image for Dunja.
165 reviews85 followers
April 28, 2024
čitala sam je sa drugaricama i bukvalno smo plakale od smeha 🧡
(zoranu iliću treba dodeliti neku nagradu, prevod je vrhunski)
Profile Image for Bonnie.
1,435 reviews1,089 followers
June 26, 2015
Never would I have thought I'd enjoy reading about the drama of a 14 year old girl. Georgia is hilarious and reminded me of a younger, British version of Daria. Between Georgia dressing up as an olive, shaving off her eyebrows, her Scottish wild-cat Angus and her crazy baby sister who calls everyone a tosser... well Georgia is a new favorite.
Profile Image for Caitlin.
95 reviews1,822 followers
Read
December 13, 2024
just rereading my childhood faves... nothing to see here xo
Profile Image for prag ♻.
634 reviews620 followers
November 24, 2016
I need negative stars for this. The average rating needs to go dooowwwnnn.
Profile Image for Lydia.
156 reviews
February 2, 2012
Think Diary of a Wimpy Kid for tweens, without the illustrations, and one can pretty much have an accurate idea of what this book is about. Although critically acclaimed and with awards to its name () I would personally re-title this book "Diary of a Petty, Shallow Tween."

Now, don't misunderstand me. I laughed out loud at portions of the story, and most definitely felt as if I was reading the actual diary of quite a few of the tweens and young teens I work with regularly. However I would argue that the narrative is a reflection of a popular perception, but in reality a narrow representation of "tweendome" as we know it today.

Set in England (with a glossary in the back for us "American-type chums"), the character of Georgia Nicolson can be summed up in the following quotes:
1. "I have no friends. Not one single friend. No one has rung, no one has come around...I may as well be dead."
2. "I love my life! Jas has just phoned to say we've been invited to a party..."
3. "the only way I will believe in God is if something really bloody great happens to me soon."

The emotional rollercoaster of a protagonist alternates between highs and lows, detests her family most of the time, is obsessed with boys and "snogging" (aka "kissing" -- even to the point of visiting a professional snogger in order to learn the art) and is completely self-absorbed in an immature, comedic way.

Which, in reality, does describe the life of a typical tween. However, although every tween girl surely does experience these emotions and will be able to identify with the character, the extreme level of Georgia's shallowness will frustrate many. Young girls with socially conservative or religious backgrounds (who see relationships between the opposite sex as a serious matter, not something to be traded around like a baseball card), or girls who are involved in sports, the arts and academics (giving them a goal to strive for rather than finding their identity solely in their popularity) may not enjoy this book.

Over-all, a good look into the life of a tween, being an enthralling read for tweens that may identify, and the laugh-out-loud hilarity give it high marks, but there are also tweens (and parents) who may strongly dislike the loose morals and shallowness of the main character.
Profile Image for ܴë.
328 reviews64.1k followers
December 26, 2017
This was so cute and the perfect read for a day home sick from school! I have seen the movie several times and finally decided to read the book. I love Georgia's voice and am off to go read the second!
Profile Image for Madeline.
812 reviews47.9k followers
June 4, 2007
Terrific light reading. The whole series is currently at six books and there will probably be several more. The books are written in diary format, and they happen to be the diaries of the craziest British girl who ever walked this earth, plus she comes equipped with equally crazy friends and a marvelously dysfunctional family.
An example of one of Georgia's entries:
"Jas phoned and wanted to go shopping - there's some new makeup that looks so natural you can't tell you have got any on.
I said, 'Do they have eyebrows?'
She said, 'Why? What do you mean? Do you mean false eyelashes?'
I said, 'No, I mean eyebrows. You know, the hairy bits above your eyes.' Honestly, friends can be thick.
'Of course they don't have eyebrows. Everyone's got eyebrows. Why would you need a spare pair?'
I said, 'I haven't got any anymore. I shaved them off by mistake.'
She said, 'I'm coming round now; don't do anything until I get there.' "
Profile Image for Penny.
216 reviews1,396 followers
March 6, 2009
Let me just start this review by saying I love this book. LOVE IT! This is one of the few books that I've really, truly laughed out loud while reading - there were times I was seriously doubled over. It is hilarious. I'm going to start recommending this book to everyone I know.

But, just so you know, this book is strictly a fun read, nothing more (still well worth reading, believe me).

Georgia Nicolson is a self-centered fourteen-year-old girl growing up in England. Her story is told through her daily (-ish) journal entries: all about her fourth year (the equivalent of ninth grade here in the States) at her all-girl school.

She rambles on about anything and everything that crosses her mind: boys, clothing, snogging, pranks, her "inept parents", her little sister, said little sisters nappies (and how they sometimes explode or get left in her room), her monstrous cat, and knickers. While her thoughts aren't in the least bit deep - quite the opposite, really - they are quite hilarious.
2 reviews2 followers
January 28, 2023
I have to re-read this book every once in a while due to sheer hilarity. I am not allowed beverages while reading this book.
Profile Image for Katie.dorny.
1,120 reviews642 followers
May 5, 2018
This is the diary of 14 year old Georgia Nicholson. It documents her daily life and inner thoughts - it's funny and a bit daft but if you want an easy read it's worth giving a go.
Profile Image for Aakanksha Jain.
Author7 books723 followers
July 20, 2021
This book is considered an extraordinary funny bestseller, but it is utter nonsense and a waste of time and money.

Read my full review here -
Profile Image for Miks.
60 reviews2 followers
December 26, 2023
3 stars for nostalgic purposes; not much more to say than that lol
Displaying 1 - 30 of 4,940 reviews

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