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232 pages, Hardcover
First published January 1, 1986
'Of course, of course. And I've no doubt your new leaders are the most capable of men. But tell me, Taro, don't you worry at times we might be a little too hasty in following the Americans? I would be the first to agree many of the old ways must now be erased for ever, but don't you think sometimes some good things are being thrown away with the bad? Indeed, sometimes Japan has come to look like a small child learning from a strange adult.' - p.185
'Coming out of Mrs Kawakami's now, you could stand at her doorway and believe you have just been drinking at some outpost of civilization. All around, there is nothing but a desert of demolished rubble. Only the backs of several buildings far in the distance will remind you that you are not so far from the city centre. (...) So now that side of the street is nothing but ruble. No doubt the authorities have their plans, but it has been that way for three years. The rain collects in small puddles and grow stagnant amidst the broken brick. (...) The buildings on Mrs Kawakami's own side of the street have remained standing, but are unoccupied (...), a situation which makes her uncomfortable. If she became suddenly rich, she often tells us, she would buy up those properties and expand. In the meantime, she waits for someone to move into them; she would not mind if they became bars just like hers, anything provided she no longer had to live in the midst of a graveyard.' - P.26-27
'They are some who would say it is people like myself who are responsible for the terrible things that happened to this nation of ours. As far as I'm concerned, I freely admit I made many mistakes. (...) My paintings, my teachings. As you see, Dr Saito, I admit this quite readily. All I can say is that at the time I acted in good faith. I believed in all sincerity I was achieving good for my fellow countrymen. But, as you see, I am now not afraid to admit I was mistaken.' - p.123-124
"And if on reaching the foot of the hill which climbs up to my house, you pause at the Bridge of Hesitation and look back towards the remains of our old pleasure district, if the sun has not yet set completely, you may see the line of old telegraph poles ¨C still without wires to connect them ¨C disappearing into the gloom down the route you have just come, And you may be able to make out the dark clusters of birds perched uncomfortably on the tops of the poles, as though awaiting the wires along which they once lined the sky. "
' Artists¡¯, my father¡¯²õ voice continued, ¡®live in squalor and poverty. They inhabit a world which gives them every temptation to become weak-willed and depraved. Am I not right, Sachiko?¡¯
¡®Naturally. Yet perhaps there are one or two who are able to pursue an artistic career and yet avoid such pitfalls.'
An artist¡¯²õ concern is to capture beauty wherever he finds it."
...Bet galb¨±t j¨±s ateitum?t man ? pagalb?, panele Noriko. Argi j¨±s nem?gstate Bacho?
- Bacho? - Akimirk? mano dukt? atrod? sutrikusi. Paskui nusi?ypsojo ir pasak?: - Taip, i? ties?. Labai m?gstu.
- A-a, pergalingai pasak? Taro [?ia b¨±simas jaunikis], - mamai dabar teks ?? t? perm?styti.
- Mano s¨±nus niekus tau?kia, panele Noriko. A? niekada nekritikavau Bacho k¨±rybos apskritai. Ta?iau sakykit, argi ?openas ne i?kalbingesnis, jei kalb?sime apie fortepijon??
- I? ties?, - atsak? Noriko.
Tokie sausi atsakymai puikiai iliustruoja, kaip ji pasirod? per pirm?j? vakaro dal?. (p. 125)
- Tai, sp?ju, t?velis ir apie savo tapyb? visuomet b¨±davo teisus.
- Noriko, ?is pokalbis beprasmis. Be to, jeigu tau nepatinka, k? padariau sode, labai pra?om eiti ir patvarkyti, kaip nor?tum, kad b¨±t?.
- T?velis labai malonus. Bet kada gi man si¨±lote tuo u?siimti? A? neturiu visos laisvos dienos, kaip t?velis kad turi.
- K? tu turi galvoje, Noriko? A? vis? dien? buvau u?si?m?s. [...] Betgi ?itas pokalbis beprasmis. Tavo mama bent nusi?nek?davo taip, kad mudu abu gal?davom i? to pasijuokti. (p. 114)
Popietei baigiantis nusprend?iau, kad b¨±t? i?mintinga kiek praskaidrinti Noriko nuotaik?, ir b¨±tent i? ?i? paskat?, jai einant pro valgom?j?, kur s?d?jau ir skai?iau, ta?iau:
- Ne?tik?tina, Noriko, kaip tu gali vis? dien? praleisti vien gra?indamasi. Galima b¨±t? pamanyti, ?ia jau pa?ios vestuv?s.
- O t?veliui labai b¨±dinga ?aipytis, bet paskui pa?iam neb¨±ti tinkamai susiruo?us, - atkirto ji.
- A? ilgai netruksiu susiruo?ti, - atsakiau juokdamasis. - Galvoje netelpa, kad tu tam skiri i?tis? dien?. (p. 121)
Mano lai?ko tonas buvo draugi?kas ir taikingas, taigi nusivyliau po keli? dien? sulauk?s ?alto ir ??eid?iamai trumpo atsakymo:
"Neturiu pagrindo manyti, kad i? m¨±s? susitikimo gal?tume tik?tis kokios vertingos i?eigos, - ra?? mano buv?s mokinys. - D?koju u? an? dien? j¨±s? apsilankymu parodyt? mandagum?, bet nesijau?iu galintis ir toliau trukdyti jus, versdamas atlikti toki? pareig?." (p. 120-121)
Geriausi dalykai, visada sakydavo jis, susideda i? nakties ir pranyksta rytui i?au?us. Tai, k? ?mon?s vadina pl¨±duriuojan?iu pasauliu, Ono, D?isaburo mok?jo vertinti. (p. 156)
Kai ruo?iau tuos rai?inius, buvau labai jaunas. ?tariu, kad nesugeb?jau i?auk?tinti pl¨±duriuojan?io pasaulio d?l to, kad pats negal?jau prisiversti ?tik?ti jo verte. Jauni vyrai da?nai jau?ia kalt? d?l malonumo, ir tikriausiai a? pats nebuvau kitoks. Sp?ju, tada maniau, kad leisti laik? tokiose vietose, ?vaistyti savo sugeb?jimus auk?tinant tokius neap?iuopiamus ir netvarius dalykus - laiko ?vaistymas, kad tai veikiau pagedimas. Sunku ?vertinti pasaulio gro??, kai abejoji pa?iu jo patikimumu. (p. 157)
-Per pastaruosius metus a? labai daug ko i?mokau. Daug ko pasis?miau, kontempliuodamas malonum? pasaul? ir vertindamas jo trap? gro??. Bet dabar jau?iu, kad at?jo metas man pereiti prie kit? dalyk?. Sensei, a? ?sitikin?s, kad tokiais neramiais laikais kaip ?ie menininkai privalo i?mokti vertinti kai k? labiau ap?iuopiama negu tie malon¨±s dalykai, pranykstantys rytui i?au?us. Menininkams neb¨±tina visuomet gyventi dekadenti?kame ir u?darame pasaulyje. S??in? man sako, Sensei, kad negaliu am?inai likti pl¨±duriuojan?io pasaulio menininku. (p. 188)