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X Marks The Spot - A Nonbinary Anthology
X MARKS THE SPOT is an anthology of personal essays, art and poetry all by nonbinary people from around the world on the subject of gender identity and experiences. It aims to uplift the voices of nonbinary people, to provide some much-needed representation and of course to be a resource for cis allies and questioning folks. Above all, it is a space for everyone outside the gender binary to exist with all of themselves intact.
All of the contributors are nonbinary, agender, genderqueer, genderfluid, wíŋkte, trans, demigender or one of the hundreds of other labels available to people like us.
This thought-provoking project is by nonbinary people for nonbinary people. We spend so much of our time explaining ourselves for the benefit of others but this anthology is different. In these pages, we get to say what we want to say, leading to work that is at once stirring, bold and moving.
Contributions came from all around the world and they explore our experiences with coming out, transitioning, relationships, religion, race, disability and more. We are not a monolith. Our community is just as diverse and varied as any other but we hope that you might see yourself in our pages. We hope that you might learn empathy for the identities you don't understand.
Gender identity has been a subject of intense debate but ‘X Marks The Spot� provides an emotional connection that will foster learning and understanding no matter whether you’re gay or straight, trans or cis, binary or nonbinary.
The LGBT+ community has long been misunderstood and nonbinary people are no different. If you have ever wanted to know what it was like to be neither fully a man nor fully a woman, then perhaps this might begin to tell you.
All of the contributors are nonbinary, agender, genderqueer, genderfluid, wíŋkte, trans, demigender or one of the hundreds of other labels available to people like us.
This thought-provoking project is by nonbinary people for nonbinary people. We spend so much of our time explaining ourselves for the benefit of others but this anthology is different. In these pages, we get to say what we want to say, leading to work that is at once stirring, bold and moving.
Contributions came from all around the world and they explore our experiences with coming out, transitioning, relationships, religion, race, disability and more. We are not a monolith. Our community is just as diverse and varied as any other but we hope that you might see yourself in our pages. We hope that you might learn empathy for the identities you don't understand.
Gender identity has been a subject of intense debate but ‘X Marks The Spot� provides an emotional connection that will foster learning and understanding no matter whether you’re gay or straight, trans or cis, binary or nonbinary.
The LGBT+ community has long been misunderstood and nonbinary people are no different. If you have ever wanted to know what it was like to be neither fully a man nor fully a woman, then perhaps this might begin to tell you.
245 pages, Paperback
First published June 1, 2019
10 people are currently reading
742 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 20 of 20 reviews
December 6, 2022
Yes, I'm the editor of this so maybe I'm a little biased. But I'm incredibly proud of every single person in these pages who dared to tell their story, raise their voice and give us their art. Nonbinary people deserve a space and a platform, and I hope this book goes some way to providing one �
November 17, 2020
The essays, content-wise ring true as a non-binary person. Many of the authors are much younger than I am but they explored gender construction in their cultures in many of the same places I did. The places that crops up most are Tumblr and Twitter.
August 29, 2019
There are so few books about nonbinary identities so I was very happy to see this kickstarter succeed. And it's great that it's now available to buy too. It's a beautiful book and I'm grateful to all involved for sharing their experiences.
March 19, 2020
I loved reading this book! I am very grateful for this opportunity to learn about experiences that are different from my own and I am glad to see that more and more resources are being created for those who may not see themselves represented as often as others.
August 11, 2019
I cried a lot reading this book, the quality of writing is consistently high, and through all the diverse backgrounds of the writers the difficulty of navigating yourself and navigating the world as a non binary person in a binary world is clear and powerful, I am a cisgender parent and my heart was full for the bravery and integrity of the writers and artists- it’s a beautiful book, it should be required reading for everyone, the world would be a better place if we all understood that if we don’t have to think about our gender we are lucky - thank you for showing me what it’s like for you
July 14, 2022
Content warnings are listed at the end of my review!
Really, this was incredibly hard to review, and teetered dangerously close to being a did not finish. With all anthologies, you will have varying quality from each piece, but the overwhelming majority of contributions fell short for me. The anthology has a noble goal of covering the nuances of being nonbinary in conjunction to work, religion, race, ethnicity, relationships, disability, mental illness, and college through poems, short personal accounts, and occasional artwork. Unfortunately many of the works came off as drafts rather than a polished final product, and the anthology as a whole seems to have little editing focus put in.
I think the end product could have been significantly shorter, as redundancy and quality drops really spoiled this for me. Identical analogies, motifs, and phrases reappeared across works, feeling like a rehash of something you just read. A consistent issue was authors having too much confidence (excessive moody tone, oversimplification of topics) or no confidence at all (shaky tone, backtracking and over-explaining) in their writing ability, giving it a very grade school feel. Multiple editing errors, a long and clunky author bios section, and awkward formatting really contribute to that.
The amazing works that truly carried this book:
- A Collection Of Unfinished Statements: Almost bullet point like sentences about coming to terms with yourself while facing outside perception and the turmoil it causes.
- The Poet Reacts To Misgendering Themself, Again: A beautiful poem about self acceptance and focusing on the good aspects while trying to block out sources of discomfort.
- The Only Binary I Need: A deep look into how eating disorder intermingles with dysphoria, and the struggle to find recovery resources when they are targeted towards cis women.
- Dysphoria As Malware: My personal favorite, describing quieter or more subtle forms of dysphoria, affirming their validity. It’s a really uplifting piece about allowing yourself to follow the path to your comfort, and the confusion of understanding what gender label suits you best.
- The Art Of Gender Performance: An account about being a nonbinary sex worker trying to appeal to the adult industry, while also grappling with the dysphoria forced femininity causes.
Many factors contributed to my one star, but the work titled Dangling cemented this decision. TW for child abuse:
Summary:
Readability: ★☆☆☆�, This book needs heavy content warnings- if you need to avoid mentions of sex, self loathing, body dysmorphia, weight, and eating disorders, the majority of this will be rendered totally unreadable. The repetitive nature and dismal tone often made me want to quit reading altogether.
Entertainment: ★★☆☆�, The few works that I liked are why I give this two. They stood out but were in such short supply that I can’t go any higher.
Audience: Really, I wouldn’t say this is a fantastic book for allies, I feel like it will leave them with more questions, or even leave them with a bad taste in their mouth. Having to say that utterly embarrasses me, which makes me really ashamed of the filtering job done with this anthology. Even curious binary trans people wouldn’t be a great fit, especially because of the heavy consistent use of gendered body language, this isn’t dysphoria friendly whatsoever. The only people that could possibly benefit are those questioning gender and gender presentation, or those looking for support in not abiding to gender roles and stereotypes. Overall, I wouldn’t recommend this.
Content warning: beating, transphobia, dysphoria, self hatred, body dysmorphia, mentions of weight, religion, sex, homophobia, biphobia, transmisogyny, pregnancy, eating disorder, assault, surgery, child abuse, porn, sex work, sexual assault, racism.
Really, this was incredibly hard to review, and teetered dangerously close to being a did not finish. With all anthologies, you will have varying quality from each piece, but the overwhelming majority of contributions fell short for me. The anthology has a noble goal of covering the nuances of being nonbinary in conjunction to work, religion, race, ethnicity, relationships, disability, mental illness, and college through poems, short personal accounts, and occasional artwork. Unfortunately many of the works came off as drafts rather than a polished final product, and the anthology as a whole seems to have little editing focus put in.
I think the end product could have been significantly shorter, as redundancy and quality drops really spoiled this for me. Identical analogies, motifs, and phrases reappeared across works, feeling like a rehash of something you just read. A consistent issue was authors having too much confidence (excessive moody tone, oversimplification of topics) or no confidence at all (shaky tone, backtracking and over-explaining) in their writing ability, giving it a very grade school feel. Multiple editing errors, a long and clunky author bios section, and awkward formatting really contribute to that.
The amazing works that truly carried this book:
- A Collection Of Unfinished Statements: Almost bullet point like sentences about coming to terms with yourself while facing outside perception and the turmoil it causes.
- The Poet Reacts To Misgendering Themself, Again: A beautiful poem about self acceptance and focusing on the good aspects while trying to block out sources of discomfort.
- The Only Binary I Need: A deep look into how eating disorder intermingles with dysphoria, and the struggle to find recovery resources when they are targeted towards cis women.
- Dysphoria As Malware: My personal favorite, describing quieter or more subtle forms of dysphoria, affirming their validity. It’s a really uplifting piece about allowing yourself to follow the path to your comfort, and the confusion of understanding what gender label suits you best.
- The Art Of Gender Performance: An account about being a nonbinary sex worker trying to appeal to the adult industry, while also grappling with the dysphoria forced femininity causes.
Many factors contributed to my one star, but the work titled Dangling cemented this decision. TW for child abuse:
Summary:
Readability: ★☆☆☆�, This book needs heavy content warnings- if you need to avoid mentions of sex, self loathing, body dysmorphia, weight, and eating disorders, the majority of this will be rendered totally unreadable. The repetitive nature and dismal tone often made me want to quit reading altogether.
Entertainment: ★★☆☆�, The few works that I liked are why I give this two. They stood out but were in such short supply that I can’t go any higher.
Audience: Really, I wouldn’t say this is a fantastic book for allies, I feel like it will leave them with more questions, or even leave them with a bad taste in their mouth. Having to say that utterly embarrasses me, which makes me really ashamed of the filtering job done with this anthology. Even curious binary trans people wouldn’t be a great fit, especially because of the heavy consistent use of gendered body language, this isn’t dysphoria friendly whatsoever. The only people that could possibly benefit are those questioning gender and gender presentation, or those looking for support in not abiding to gender roles and stereotypes. Overall, I wouldn’t recommend this.
Content warning: beating, transphobia, dysphoria, self hatred, body dysmorphia, mentions of weight, religion, sex, homophobia, biphobia, transmisogyny, pregnancy, eating disorder, assault, surgery, child abuse, porn, sex work, sexual assault, racism.
May 12, 2020
It’s pretty intense, but I liked it a lot. There is an incredibly diverse cast of voices in here, as well as incredibly diverse experiences. I loved hearing about all the extremely different journeys and explorations of being nonbinary or trans, and I think anyone who’s explored these issues themselves, in any capacity, will find parts of this book that ring true for them. Many entries in here are straightforward experiences of certain events or longer journeys, while others are very well thought-out observations or in-depth analyses of different aspects of being outside the binary. Great artwork and poetry are also scattered throughout, making for a very full experience.
September 11, 2020
The most inclusive book about gender diverse experiences I've ever read. There's at least 30 different people who contributed from a variety of backgrounds. AFAB and AMAB people. White, Black, South Asian, East Asian, Indigenous, Pacific Islander, and more. Disabled and abled. Fat and skinny. People who figured out as a teenager, and people who found out mid adulthood. Most identify as nonbinary, but there are some non western genders too. If you're looking for a book that truly encapsulates the nonbinary experience, this is the best you'll likely find.
May 29, 2020
What a lovely, wonderful collection of essays, poetry & artwork! I'm nonbinary, and reading this made me feel understood & seen.
January 22, 2020
this gave me more thoughts and feelings than any book in a long time, and felt almost like reading academia in the amount of processing I felt like I was doing as I read it, and I had to take a couple breaks, just because it felt so intense. This is partly because it's an anthology, I think, with so many different, powerful voices telling different, powerful, and often upsetting stories.
pros:
- the writing was of a consistently high standard and though there was some overlap between pieces, there was overall surprisingly little. Everyone's story/poems really did feel individual
- I liked that it included an exploration of sexuality as well, as this is often tied to gender and yet not often explored
- I liked the variety of voices, and how it definitely challenged me, as a white person
- the strong sense of being understood is more powerful than almost anything and i'm so glad books like this exist
overall, i'd recommend this to a nonbinary, trans, genderqueer person - I would say preferably someone who's already somewhat settled in their identity, I feel like this book might be quite discouraging if you'd only just realised that you're not cis. I also wouldn't personally recommend it as an introductory book for cis people to understand non-binary identities, though they might fine it interesting if they already had some understanding of the community. But that's just my personal opinion. Very worth reading, even as it was intense in places
pros:
- the writing was of a consistently high standard and though there was some overlap between pieces, there was overall surprisingly little. Everyone's story/poems really did feel individual
- I liked that it included an exploration of sexuality as well, as this is often tied to gender and yet not often explored
- I liked the variety of voices, and how it definitely challenged me, as a white person
- the strong sense of being understood is more powerful than almost anything and i'm so glad books like this exist
overall, i'd recommend this to a nonbinary, trans, genderqueer person - I would say preferably someone who's already somewhat settled in their identity, I feel like this book might be quite discouraging if you'd only just realised that you're not cis. I also wouldn't personally recommend it as an introductory book for cis people to understand non-binary identities, though they might fine it interesting if they already had some understanding of the community. But that's just my personal opinion. Very worth reading, even as it was intense in places
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
July 6, 2020
This book is incredibly powerful and affirming to read as a non-binary person.
I was excited when the introduction for the anthology openly stated that this book was not going to be 'for a cis gaze'. This meant that contributors could dedicate their sections to being true and authentic and open about their identities and journeys in all their complexity and individuality without having to pander to a cis audience who would want constant explanations and justifications.
The beauty of this anthology is in it's diversity and range. It thoroughly destroyed the common misconception that all non-binary people are white, thin and androgynous. Every contribution was unique precisely because of the personal experiences that went into writing them.
Particularly interesting parts for me were discussions about the intersection between eating disorders and gender dysphoria as this is something I have struggled with personally, sections on the impact of colonialism and the erasure of gender non-conforming identities and all of the discussions regarding mental health.
I would thoroughly recommend this book to everyone outside of the gender binary. It is a powerful thing to experience a sense of community and connection especially if you do not know many gender non-conforming people in your personal life and this is what this anthology gave me.
I was excited when the introduction for the anthology openly stated that this book was not going to be 'for a cis gaze'. This meant that contributors could dedicate their sections to being true and authentic and open about their identities and journeys in all their complexity and individuality without having to pander to a cis audience who would want constant explanations and justifications.
The beauty of this anthology is in it's diversity and range. It thoroughly destroyed the common misconception that all non-binary people are white, thin and androgynous. Every contribution was unique precisely because of the personal experiences that went into writing them.
Particularly interesting parts for me were discussions about the intersection between eating disorders and gender dysphoria as this is something I have struggled with personally, sections on the impact of colonialism and the erasure of gender non-conforming identities and all of the discussions regarding mental health.
I would thoroughly recommend this book to everyone outside of the gender binary. It is a powerful thing to experience a sense of community and connection especially if you do not know many gender non-conforming people in your personal life and this is what this anthology gave me.
October 8, 2021
An anthology for nonbinary/non-cis people by nonbinary/non-cis people - exactly how it should be. This is not for the cis and I love that about this book. We have to spend too much time and energy explaining ourselves to society and I think we deserve space (in this case literature) where this is not necessary or demanded of us.
The book contains a good mixture of poems, essays and art, where some have resonated deeply with me and other have given me new or other perspectives on gender and gender identity. It shows how there is not one specific nonbinary experience, but a multitude, that are far from monolithic and how other aspects of our lives can affect or intersect with gender.
Every creators� pronouns are listed, and the editor also put content warnings on works with sensitive matters, something that definitely should be more common.
My only criticism is that there are some small errors in the editing, for example I noticed two cases where the font could not incorporate certain symbols/letters not commonly used in English literature, leaving a white square (�) in the middle of the word. While it did not hinder my reading experience, I think it is important to be able to correctly incorporate culturally specific words.
All in all, this was an amazing read and I will hold many of the works dearly to my heart.
The book contains a good mixture of poems, essays and art, where some have resonated deeply with me and other have given me new or other perspectives on gender and gender identity. It shows how there is not one specific nonbinary experience, but a multitude, that are far from monolithic and how other aspects of our lives can affect or intersect with gender.
Every creators� pronouns are listed, and the editor also put content warnings on works with sensitive matters, something that definitely should be more common.
My only criticism is that there are some small errors in the editing, for example I noticed two cases where the font could not incorporate certain symbols/letters not commonly used in English literature, leaving a white square (�) in the middle of the word. While it did not hinder my reading experience, I think it is important to be able to correctly incorporate culturally specific words.
All in all, this was an amazing read and I will hold many of the works dearly to my heart.
May 11, 2022
There are few books about nonbinary identities, so I was pleased to see this Kickstarter succeed. And it's great that it's now available to buy too. It's a beautiful book, and I'm grateful to all involved for sharing their experiences.
The quality of writing is consistently high, and through all the diverse backgrounds of the writers, the difficulty of navigating yourself and navigating the world as a non-binary person in a binary world is clear and powerful; it’s a beautiful book, and it should be required reading for everyone, the world would be a better place if we all understood that if we don’t have to think about our gender, we are lucky - thank you for showing me what it’s like for you.
I loved reading this book! I am very grateful for this opportunity to learn about experiences different from my own. I am glad to see that more and more resources are being created for those who may not see themselves represented as often as others.
The quality of writing is consistently high, and through all the diverse backgrounds of the writers, the difficulty of navigating yourself and navigating the world as a non-binary person in a binary world is clear and powerful; it’s a beautiful book, and it should be required reading for everyone, the world would be a better place if we all understood that if we don’t have to think about our gender, we are lucky - thank you for showing me what it’s like for you.
I loved reading this book! I am very grateful for this opportunity to learn about experiences different from my own. I am glad to see that more and more resources are being created for those who may not see themselves represented as often as others.
December 25, 2022
I loved reading this, I give it 4 stars purely for the representation of all sorts of non binary people. It is difficult to rate an anthology, because there is so much to unpack. Overall I had higher expectations of the writing, and maybe of the content. I think on some moment I would have appreciated some more academic essay. I got a bit bored of all the story's of dysphoria, maybe the book was a bit to long for me. Not in a way that I coudn't read it anymore, but more in a way that I felt a bit overwhelmed by the essays of other people.
I had a lot on the content warnings, and I loved the variety of poems, drawings and essays.
I especially loved:
- A collection of unfinished statements
- The poet reacts to misgendering themself, again
- The only binary I need
- Dysphoria as Malware
- Where is the land?
Update: The longer I think about the book, the more i appreciate what it means to have a full book of non binary essays!! I'm not sure if I would recomment it to cis folks..
I had a lot on the content warnings, and I loved the variety of poems, drawings and essays.
I especially loved:
- A collection of unfinished statements
- The poet reacts to misgendering themself, again
- The only binary I need
- Dysphoria as Malware
- Where is the land?
Update: The longer I think about the book, the more i appreciate what it means to have a full book of non binary essays!! I'm not sure if I would recomment it to cis folks..
March 9, 2023
I really wanted to enjoy this book more. Some essays and poems were really stand out, and quite frankly struck me to my core. In fact I would go as far as to say that some of them helped me to learn more about my self as a nonbinary queer individual. Others however, left me feeling a sense of� for lack of better words, cringe? I physically winced in pain at some of them as I felt I was reading something from a preteens diary. That’s not to say that those works wouldn’t be stand out to other readers, maybe even eye opening, unfortunately it just wasn’t for me. That might also have entirely more to do with my own journey through identity and self acceptance than anything. Regardless of the pieces that weren’t to my liking, a solid majority of this book was great. Even more important however, is the fact that this book is representation of and by queer nb folks. That in and of itself is satisfying enough for me to not regret purchasing this book.
April 13, 2021
Let me make it clear if you should pick this book up: To the cis people wondering, "how can someone be sure they're non-binary?" They just are, this book is not for you. To the people wondering, "how do I know if I'm trans or not?" Well, that's not a very cis thought, is it? This book may help you out. Or not. Because there's no easy answer, you may just suddenly know.
I loved this book and admire the willingness of these poets, essayists, and artists, etc. to let someone else in on their intense and wildly different experiences and I feel richer for having caught but a glimpse of their lives. A highly recommended book for trans people, especially non-binary people. And even if you don't find yourself, at least you'll find others like you.
I loved this book and admire the willingness of these poets, essayists, and artists, etc. to let someone else in on their intense and wildly different experiences and I feel richer for having caught but a glimpse of their lives. A highly recommended book for trans people, especially non-binary people. And even if you don't find yourself, at least you'll find others like you.
July 30, 2020
I found this book very educational for anyone like myself who knows remarkably little about nonbinary identities. Like the human race, the variety of experiences, cultures, trauma and discovery experienced by the authors was revelatory and eye-opening. The different essays included many terms that sound similar but really are not synonyms so I felt a need to create a pesonal dictionary of nonbinary term terms.
February 14, 2020
As with any anthology, the quality ranges. Some pieces are good, others are breathtaking. There are a few pieces in here that will definitely stay with me.
March 10, 2022
this book is beautifully put together. genuinely makes me feel less alone. theres so many beautiful poems nd stuff in here. def some i like more than others, but super good all the same.
April 15, 2021
I feel bad giving this a one star rating, but that’s just how it goes. As a nonbinary person I find the mere existence of this book affirming on so many levels. However, as a non-fiction anthology, it lacks any real literary merit. Obviously self published, it is in some serious need of editing. This collection of stories and poems written by regular folks is more like a haphazard college zine than an actual book. It lacks substance which diminishes its ability to illuminate the nonbinary experience. I wouldn’t recommend this to allies looking to gain a deeper understanding of their loved ones (and it really does pain me to say that). If anything it can be read as a tool for those who are seeking a sense of community.
Plus, it is hard to take it seriously when every third entry comes with ridiculous “content warnings�. If you pick up a book about gender nonconformity the trigger warning is implied. You have to be prepared to read about the difficulties that arise from being brave enough to exist outside the binary; courage is required. Being told we need to fear the uncomfortable reality of the nonbinary experience every six pages does not engender hope or encourage self acceptance. I’m glad I paid to buy the book because my well earned money contributed to the celebration of trans lives (and we all deserve to be celebrated!), but it doesn’t change the fact that it’s just not good writing.
Plus, it is hard to take it seriously when every third entry comes with ridiculous “content warnings�. If you pick up a book about gender nonconformity the trigger warning is implied. You have to be prepared to read about the difficulties that arise from being brave enough to exist outside the binary; courage is required. Being told we need to fear the uncomfortable reality of the nonbinary experience every six pages does not engender hope or encourage self acceptance. I’m glad I paid to buy the book because my well earned money contributed to the celebration of trans lives (and we all deserve to be celebrated!), but it doesn’t change the fact that it’s just not good writing.
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