Patrick's bookshelf: 2008 en-US Thu, 09 Jan 2014 19:33:47 -0800 60 Patrick's bookshelf: 2008 144 41 /images/layout/goodreads_logo_144.jpg <![CDATA[Kitchen Confidential: Adventures in the Culinary Underbelly]]> 33313 A deluxe, annotated edition of Kitchen Confidential to celebrate the life of Anthony Bourdain, featuring new photo inserts

Over two decades ago, the New Yorker published a now infamous article, “Don’t Eat Before Reading This,� by then little-known chef Anthony Bourdain. Bourdain spared no one’s appetite as he revealed what happens behind the kitchen door. The article was a sensation, and the book it spawned, the now iconic Kitchen Confidential, became an even bigger sensation and megabestseller. Frankly confessional, addictively acerbic, and utterly unsparing, Bourdain pulls no punches in this memoir of his years in the restaurant business.

Fans will love to return to this deliciously funny, delectably shocking banquet of wild-but-true tales of life in the culinary trade, laying out Bourdain’s more than a quarter-century of drugs, sex, and haute cuisine. Including a handwritten introduction and annotations done by Bourdain about a decade after the book was originally published, this edition also features previously unpublished photos to accompany the now-classic text.]]> 312 Anthony Bourdain 0060899220 Patrick 1 2008 4.17 2000 Kitchen Confidential: Adventures in the Culinary Underbelly
author: Anthony Bourdain
name: Patrick
average rating: 4.17
book published: 2000
rating: 1
read at: 2008/03/07
date added: 2014/01/09
shelves: 2008
review:
Halfway through this book I remembered I don't have the slightest bit of interest in the culinary arts whatsoever. Luckily, I was listening to it on audiotape. Unluckily, cassette 4 broke and I had to read the rest with my eyes. I'm not sure why I picked this up, I guess because I heard Bourdain was the "punk rock chef," but besides listening to the Sex Pistols and Velvet Underground while he cooked, there's not a whole lot else going on of a punk rock nature. He was a drug addict, but the book kind of skips right over that, which would have been interesting; I'd rather it had been more of a total autobiography than just a chronicle of his history of the restaurant biz, but once again, it's my fault because that's clearly what the book is labeled as. I wanted dirty stories from the seedy underbelly of the high-class dining world, but it didn't really get much wilder than a bunch of cooks making racist, sexist, homophobic jokes. Dude, that's not exclusive to the culinary world, that's pretty much behind the scenes at any workplace, or really any time you get a lot of misplaced testosterone in one room. You're not leading a "pirate crew," you're supervising people who are following recipes. I rented a dvd from his show "No Reservations" and was again surprised at myself for forgetting I don't really care about exotic foods, and that's a traveling show, which I'm also not into. So now I'm watching like 3 hours of a guy I don't like, eating shit I don't care about, in places I'm not interested in going to. It should be noted that I do like Rachel Ray's "Tasty Travels," but that's another story I don't want to get into. The only really funny anecdote I found was when he was in an interview for chef at a new steakhouse in New York, things were going smoothly until the owner asked him, "What do you know about me?" Bourdain thought it over, not sure what he should say, so he said the truth, "Nothing." So then the guy gives him a weird look, and the interview ends with Bourdain knowing he's not getting the job. He walks a few blocks down the street before he realizes the guy actually asked, "What do you know about MEAT."
]]> As Simple as Snow 301952 308 Gregory Galloway 0425207803 Patrick 1 2008 3.78 2005 As Simple as Snow
author: Gregory Galloway
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.78
book published: 2005
rating: 1
read at: 2008/03/27
date added: 2014/01/06
shelves: 2008
review:
This was a real shit-show. A bland high school dude falls in love with this goth chick who has all these obscure interests she forces on him, and long story short, she disappears and you have to try and figure out if she was murdered, committed suicide, or ran away. There are a bunch of so-called "clues" throughout the book that are actually all red herrings and the book concludes with no resolution. That didn't bother me so much as the fact that the road to nowhere was boring. I would only recommend this to someone who I was sure wanted to punch me in the face already.
]]> <![CDATA[Persepolis 2: The Story of a Return (Persepolis, #2)]]> 9517 Persepolis, heralded by the Los Angeles Times as "one of the freshest and most original memoirs of our day," Marjane Satrapi dazzled us with her heartrending memoir-in-comic-strips about growing up in Iran during the Islamic Revolution. Here is the continuation of her fascinating story. In 1984, Marjane flees fundamentalism and the war with Iraq to begin a new life in Vienna. Once there, she faces the trials of adolescence far from her friends and family, and while she soon carves out a place for herself among a group of fellow outsiders, she continues to struggle for a sense of belonging.

Finding that she misses her home more than she can stand, Marjane returns to Iran after graduation. Her difficult homecoming forces her to confront the changes both she and her country have undergone in her absence and her shame at what she perceives as her failure in Austria. Marjane allows her past to weigh heavily on her until she finds some like-minded friends, falls in love, and begins studying art at a university. However, the repression and state-sanctioned chauvinism eventually lead her to question whether she can have a future in Iran.

As funny and poignant as its predecessor, Persepolis 2 is another clear-eyed and searing condemnation of the human cost of fundamentalism. In its depiction of the struggles of growing up--here compounded by Marjane's status as an outsider both abroad and at home--it is raw, honest, and incredibly illuminating.]]> 187 Marjane Satrapi 0375714669 Patrick 3 2008 4.22 2001 Persepolis 2: The Story of a Return (Persepolis, #2)
author: Marjane Satrapi
name: Patrick
average rating: 4.22
book published: 2001
rating: 3
read at:
date added: 2014/01/06
shelves: 2008
review:
The second half of Satrapi's autobiographical graphic novel finds her graduating high school in Austria and returning, in what she feels is shame, to her tumultuous and repressive native land of Iran in the late 1980's, where she finds herself alienated from her peers, looking for true love, searching for her personal identity, etc. It's strange that something so culturally different in terms of era and geography can still be so easy to relate to. I'm pretty excited to see the animated movie when it comes out on DVD. Also I looked up some pictures of Satrapi and she is pretty hot for a terrorist.
]]> The Lovely Bones 12232938
So begins the story of Susie Salmon, who is adjusting to her new home in heaven, a place that is not at all what she expected, even as she is watching life on earth continue without her -- her friends trading rumors about her disappearance, her killer trying to cover his tracks, her grief-stricken family unraveling. Out of unspeakable tragedy and loss, The Lovely Bones succeeds, miraculously, in building a tale filled with hope, humor, suspense, even joy.]]> 372 Alice Sebold 0316166685 Patrick 1 2008
1. The mom suddenly deciding to return to her family when the dad has a heart attack.

2. Susie possesses Ruth's body so she can fuck the med student. So if you die a virgin, God lets you back on Earth for a few hours to bang someone with another person's genitals, putting them at risk for an STD or unwanted pregnancy? What if you die as a toddler, do you still get to come back and fuck someone? Also, she says she doesn't want to go after her murderer while in the host, that's real fucking nice, Susie, the whole book's about you wishing you hadn't died and the strain it put on your family, and you'd rather take a dick in a bathtub then stop him from raping/killing more children. That's great. And that whole idea was a rip-off of the movie "Ghost," remember? If you're gonna plagiarize from a Patrick Swayze movie, please make it "Roadhouse."

P.S. The real version of this book is called "Remember Me" by Christopher Pike which I read when I was ten.]]> 3.87 2002 The Lovely Bones
author: Alice Sebold
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.87
book published: 2002
rating: 1
read at: 2008/07/21
date added: 2013/12/30
shelves: 2008
review:
I have no idea how so many people can love such a boring, pointless book. I don't read a lot of juggernaut pop-fiction, but at least with "DaVinci Code" I can see the appeal; this one's draw baffles me. Besides being uninteresting, there are two plot points that were just rancid:

1. The mom suddenly deciding to return to her family when the dad has a heart attack.

2. Susie possesses Ruth's body so she can fuck the med student. So if you die a virgin, God lets you back on Earth for a few hours to bang someone with another person's genitals, putting them at risk for an STD or unwanted pregnancy? What if you die as a toddler, do you still get to come back and fuck someone? Also, she says she doesn't want to go after her murderer while in the host, that's real fucking nice, Susie, the whole book's about you wishing you hadn't died and the strain it put on your family, and you'd rather take a dick in a bathtub then stop him from raping/killing more children. That's great. And that whole idea was a rip-off of the movie "Ghost," remember? If you're gonna plagiarize from a Patrick Swayze movie, please make it "Roadhouse."

P.S. The real version of this book is called "Remember Me" by Christopher Pike which I read when I was ten.
]]> <![CDATA[Amphigorey Also (Amphigorey, #3)]]> 51245 256 Edward Gorey 0156056720 Patrick 5 2008 4.40 1983 Amphigorey Also (Amphigorey, #3)
author: Edward Gorey
name: Patrick
average rating: 4.40
book published: 1983
rating: 5
read at:
date added: 2013/12/11
shelves: 2008
review:
Anywhere you open up an Edward Gorey book, you will immediately be punched in the mouth by Rad. The highlight of this book was "The Sopping Thursday," the most powerful story of a man losing his umbrella you will ever see.
]]> The Average American Male 151724 246 Chad Kultgen 0061231673 Patrick 4 2008 3.43 2007 The Average American Male
author: Chad Kultgen
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.43
book published: 2007
rating: 4
read at: 2008/03/18
date added: 2013/10/26
shelves: 2008
review:
This is a really funny and purposely offensive stream-of-consciousness look into a few months in the life of a "typical" young man, as seen through his eyes. I read this at the bookstore; oddly enough it was recommended by a female via her Barnes and Noble "employee picks" card on the bookshelf, with the review "Not, I repeat, NOT for children." The mind of the narrator is obnoxious, sex-obsessed, and profane, but eventually you get used to it, it levels off, and then certain lines just seem to jump out and make you laugh. Highlights for me were whenever he was involved in some conversation with his girlfriend he really wanted no part of and would think of ways to get out of it, like faking a stroke and total amnesia so he could pretend to not remember the entire relationship, another uncomfortable situation resulted in the thought, "I wonder what the odds of a terrorist strike at the mall at this exact moment are," and yet another chapter had him considering shitting his pants so he could end lunch with his girlfriend's mother early. Let me ruin another part for you, after meeting some girls at a bar, he notes, "This confirms my long-held theory that there are two kinds of Asian women: nymphomaniacs and corpses." Then he describes a poster of Gwen Steffani by saying, "She is punching and kicking at nothing, to show her individual style of rebellion." I was paraphrasing there. Anyways, it was really not-nice humor and a really fast read. As for the debate concerning the asshole main character, "Is this really what goes on in the average American male's head, or is it satirical?" my answer is who gives a fuck, it's just a book.
]]> <![CDATA[Heart of Darkness and Other Tales]]> 2235931 0 Joseph Conrad 0613363922 Patrick 1 2008 3.43 1990 Heart of Darkness and Other Tales
author: Joseph Conrad
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.43
book published: 1990
rating: 1
read at: 2008/10/14
date added: 2013/09/05
shelves: 2008
review:
I think this was a little over my head, apparently Conrad spoke like a half-dozen languages so maybe I lost something in the translation because I only speak one and 1/4. I got the main themes of imperialism, racism, the thin line between civilization and barbarism, but as for any specific thing that was happening in the book while I was reading, I'm really at a loss for. I did like "Apocalypse Now" though, for what it's worth.
]]> Black Coffee Blues 211151 very light edge wear to cover 160 henry-rollins 0753510359 Patrick 3 2008, 2011
Re-read 2011: Bumped it up from two to three stars. Been on a Rollins tear lately--which says good things about my current mental state--and liked it better the second time.]]> 3.87 1992 Black Coffee Blues
author: henry-rollins
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.87
book published: 1992
rating: 3
read at: 2008/01/28
date added: 2011/10/25
shelves: 2008, 2011
review:
The first half of this book is paragraph-long stories, most of which are about someone hating life and then shooting themselves or someone else. The title section is a little more interesting, diary entries all written from different stops on a tour while he has his morning coffee, and what's going on in his head at that moment. Reaffirms my opinion that his writing is pretty bad, but the spoken-word dvds he's put out the past few years are gold.

Re-read 2011: Bumped it up from two to three stars. Been on a Rollins tear lately--which says good things about my current mental state--and liked it better the second time.
]]> The Tales of Beedle the Bard 4020390
Additional notes for each story penned by Professor Albus Dumbledore will be enjoyed by Muggles and wizards alike, as the Professor muses on the morals illuminated by the tales, and reveals snippets of information about life at Hogwarts.

A uniquely magical volume, with illustrations by the author, J. K. Rowling, that will be treasured for years to come.]]> 111 J.K. Rowling 0545128285 Patrick 2 2008 3.94 2008 The Tales of Beedle the Bard
author: J.K. Rowling
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.94
book published: 2008
rating: 2
read at:
date added: 2011/08/10
shelves: 2008
review:

]]> <![CDATA[Why We Suck: A Feel Good Guide to Staying Fat, Loud, Lazy and Stupid]]> 2983489 A hilarious blast of scathing irreverence from the award-winning actor and comedian.

"A pissed off Leary is the best Leary," says one critic of the writer and comic. In Why We Suck, Dr. Denis Leary uses his common sense, and his biting and hilarious take on the world, to attack the politically correct, the hypocritical, the obese, the thin--basically everyone who takes themselves too seriously. He does so with the extra oomph of a doctorate bestowed upon him by his alma mater Emerson College. "Sure it's just a celebrity type of thing--they only gave it to me because I'm famous," Leary explains. "But it's legal and it means I get to say I'm a doctor--just like Dr. Phil."

In Why We Suck, Leary's famously smart style and sardonic wit have found their fullest and fiercest expression yet. Zeroing in on the ridiculous wherever he finds it, Leary unravels his Irish Catholic upbringing, the folly of celebrity, the pressures of family life, and the great hypocrisy of politics with the same bright, savage, and profane insight he brought to his critically acclaimed one-man shows No Cure for Cancer and Lock 'n Load, and his platinum-selling song, "Asshole."

Proudly Irish American, defiantly working class, with a reserve of compassion for the underdog and the overlooked, Leary delivers blistering diatribes that are penetrating social commentary with no holds barred. Leary's book will find wide appeal among people who want to laugh out loud or find a guide who matches their view of what's wrong in America and the world-at-large; and fans of his one-man shows, his many movies, and Rescue Me, Leary's Golden Globe and Emmy-nominated television show. Why We Suck is the latest salvo from one of America's most original and biting comic satirists.]]> 240 Denis Leary 0670031607 Patrick 1 2008 3.67 2008 Why We Suck: A Feel Good Guide to Staying Fat, Loud, Lazy and Stupid
author: Denis Leary
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.67
book published: 2008
rating: 1
read at: 2008/12/30
date added: 2011/01/09
shelves: 2008
review:
I still have 80 pages left, but I can already tell this isn't gonna get any better. I'm not that familiar with Leary, but I'm pretty sure he's more talented than this book. It's a rant-fest, which is fine, except the topics he chooses are all TIRED TIRED TIRED. I'm talking Anna Nicole, Lewinskygate, "A Million Little Pieces," Child Stars Gone Bad, the guy who sued McDonald's when he spilled coffee on himself, etc. PETA wouldn't even have to hire a lawyer to get Leary convicted for the relentless beating he gives to these dead horses. The only saving grace is the few autobiographical anecdotes he throws in from his childhood. A memoir about growing up Irish Catholic in Boston would have been sooo much better than this tripe.
]]> X-Men: Law of the Jungle 723778
But this is not the same Sauron the X-Men have defeated in the past. Gone is the overconfident, boasting monster, and in his place is a cunning, careful, deadly foe who may be too much for even the X-Men to handle!]]> 293 Dave Smeds 0425164861 Patrick 3 2008 3.69 1998 X-Men: Law of the Jungle
author: Dave Smeds
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.69
book published: 1998
rating: 3
read at: 2008/11/18
date added: 2009/06/03
shelves: 2008
review:
This is a fun, albeit generic, adventure in the Savage Land (a prehistoric, dinosaur-infested area of Anarctica disguised by "cloud cover"). Sauron, the hypnotic, energy-vampire pterodactyl-man, is up to his old tricks again, and it's up to Storm, Wolverine, Archangel, Psylocke, Beast, Iceman, and Cannonball (alongside Ka-Zar, Lord of the Savage Land, his wife Shanna the She-Devil, and Zabu, their pet sabre-tooth tiger) to stop him. Sauron is of course aided by Magneto's evil mutates such as the frog-like Amphibius, blind but super-strong Gaza, four-armed Barbarus, wolf-man Lupo, and female dizzy-spell-inducing Vertigo. The story is basically that some of the X-Men get captured and the rest try to rescue them, but it's well-done overall, and also has a romantic sub-plot with Archangel and Psylocke I wasn't aware of, as well as a neat, unexpected orgin story flashback from Lupo's point of view.
]]> Loop (Ring, #3) 38378
Learn the final truth about the Ring!

In this much-awaited conclusion of the Ring trilogy, everything you thought you knew about the story will have to be put aside. In Loop , the killer mimics both AIDS and cancer in a deadly new guise. Kaoru Futami, a youth mature beyond his years, must hope to find answers in the deserts of New Mexico and the Loop project, a virtual matrix created by scientists. The fate of more than just his loved ones depends on Kaoru's success.

Loop is written as a stand-alone work though it is best enjoyed by fans of Ring and Spiral . The author's own favorite of the trilogy, this astounding finale is an emotionally resonant tale that scales conceptual heights from an angle all its own. Fiction about fiction has rarely been so gripping.]]> 288 KĹŤji Suzuki 193223425X Patrick 5 2008 3.55 1998 Loop (Ring, #3)
author: KĹŤji Suzuki
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.55
book published: 1998
rating: 5
read at: 2008/10/17
date added: 2009/06/03
shelves: 2008
review:
The finale of the "Ring" trilogy has nothing--yet everything--to do with the first book and the evil little girl, Sadako (who we all remember coming out of the TV to kill Naomi Watts's babydaddy in the U.S. movie version). Allusions to the original conflict aren't addressed until well into the story, which deals with a genius med student in Japan trying to solve the mystery of the "virus" when he falls in love with a woman whose son is in the hospital with a terminal illness. Although the first two books are definitely horror, Suzuki defies genre classification here, using elements of horror, sci-fi, romance, philosophy/religion, computer science/technology, history, and micro-biology--it's pretty out there. The climax delivers a pretty hardcore existential/nihilist (I'm not sure which) concept that is more startling, but maybe not as bleak, as the ending of "Spiral." "Loop" can actually be read as a stand-alone book, although it would be better served if you read "Ring" and "Spiral" first. P.S. Whoever translated these did a really good job, they're much more coherent English than a lot of subtitles of Asian movies.
]]> <![CDATA[On Writing: A Memoir of the Craft]]> 10569 (back cover)]]> 320 Stephen King 0743455967 Patrick 4 2008
***One year later***

I thought I had posted these quotes here when I read it, but maybe I did that on myspace or something and forgot, but they're so good I had dog-eared the pages:

"...when I lay in bed at night under my eave, listening to the wind in the trees or the rats in the attic, it was not Debbie Reynolds as Tammy or Sandra Dee as Gidget that I dreamed of, but Yvette Vickers from 'Attack of the Giant Leeches' or Luana Anders from 'Dementia 13.' Never mind sweet; never mind uplifting; never mind Snow White and the Seven Goddamn Dwarfs. At thirteen I wanted monsters that ate whole cities, radioactive corpses that came out of the ocean and ate surfers, and girls in black bras who looked like trailer trash."

"I have spend a good many years--too many, I think--being ashamed about what I write. I think I was forty before I realized that almost every writer of fiction and poetry who has ever published a line has been accused by someone of wasting his or her God-given talent. If you write (or paint or dance or sculpt or sing, I suppose), someone will try to make you feel lousy about it."]]> 4.33 2000 On Writing: A Memoir of the Craft
author: Stephen King
name: Patrick
average rating: 4.33
book published: 2000
rating: 4
read at:
date added: 2009/01/19
shelves: 2008
review:
Mostly a guide on fiction writing, but I really liked the 100-page autobiography it opened with.

***One year later***

I thought I had posted these quotes here when I read it, but maybe I did that on myspace or something and forgot, but they're so good I had dog-eared the pages:

"...when I lay in bed at night under my eave, listening to the wind in the trees or the rats in the attic, it was not Debbie Reynolds as Tammy or Sandra Dee as Gidget that I dreamed of, but Yvette Vickers from 'Attack of the Giant Leeches' or Luana Anders from 'Dementia 13.' Never mind sweet; never mind uplifting; never mind Snow White and the Seven Goddamn Dwarfs. At thirteen I wanted monsters that ate whole cities, radioactive corpses that came out of the ocean and ate surfers, and girls in black bras who looked like trailer trash."

"I have spend a good many years--too many, I think--being ashamed about what I write. I think I was forty before I realized that almost every writer of fiction and poetry who has ever published a line has been accused by someone of wasting his or her God-given talent. If you write (or paint or dance or sculpt or sing, I suppose), someone will try to make you feel lousy about it."
]]> House of M 605832 Brian Michael Bendis 190523922X Patrick 1 2008 3.68 2006 House of M
author: Brian Michael Bendis
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.68
book published: 2006
rating: 1
read at: 2008/08/01
date added: 2008/12/31
shelves: 2008
review:

]]> <![CDATA[X-Men: The Complete Age of Apocalypse Epic, Book 4]]> 276458
Collects Generation Next #4, X-Calibre #4, X-Man #4 & #53-54, Factor X #4, Gambit And The X-Ternals #4, Amazing X-Men (1995) #4, Weapon X (1995) #4, X-Universe #2, X-Men: Omega, Blink #4 and X-Men: Prime]]> 376 Scott Lobdell 0785120521 Patrick 1 2008 4.11 2005 X-Men: The Complete Age of Apocalypse Epic, Book 4
author: Scott Lobdell
name: Patrick
average rating: 4.11
book published: 2005
rating: 1
read at: 2008/08/01
date added: 2008/12/31
shelves: 2008
review:

]]> <![CDATA[X-Men: The Complete Age of Apocalypse Epic, Book 2]]> 276463
Collects X-Men: Alpha, Generation Next #1, Astonishing X-Men Vol. 1 #1, X-Calibre #1, Gambit and the X-Ternals #1-2, Weapon X #1-2, Amazing X-Men #1-2, Factor X #1-2, X-Man #1]]> 376 Scott Lobdell 0785118748 Patrick 1 2008 4.02 2006 X-Men: The Complete Age of Apocalypse Epic, Book 2
author: Scott Lobdell
name: Patrick
average rating: 4.02
book published: 2006
rating: 1
read at: 2008/08/01
date added: 2008/12/31
shelves: 2008
review:

]]> <![CDATA[X-Men: The Complete Age of Apocalypse Epic, Book 1]]> 276464
Collects X-Men Blink #1-4 (2001), X-Men Chronicles (1995) #1-2, Tales of the Age of Apocalypse: By the Light (1996), Tales of the Age of Apocalypse: Sinister Bloodlines (1997)]]> 360 Scott Lobdell 0785117148 Patrick 1 2008 4.01 2005 X-Men: The Complete Age of Apocalypse Epic, Book 1
author: Scott Lobdell
name: Patrick
average rating: 4.01
book published: 2005
rating: 1
read at: 2008/08/01
date added: 2008/12/31
shelves: 2008
review:

]]> Model Behaviour 25072 CiaoBella!, 'a lifestyle magazine for young women', is only concerned about Connor's profile of Chip Ralston, the celebrity of the month whose PR fortress has suddenly become impenetrable. Thank goodness for Pallas, a knock-out table dancer with a heart of gold. As the reader wonders with Connor what's happened to Philomena, if Jeremy will get his dog back, and whether our hero will get his interview with Chip, the wonderful narrative roars away at a stunning clip. Jay McInerney is on absolutely top form in this hilarious (and serious) novel about celebrity, romance and 20th-century literature.]]> 240 Jay McInerney 0747542333 Patrick 4 2008 3.22 1998 Model Behaviour
author: Jay McInerney
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.22
book published: 1998
rating: 4
read at: 2008/12/27
date added: 2008/12/27
shelves: 2008
review:
I was really pleasantly surprised at how funny this was, I didn't remember "Bright Lights Big City" being humorous at all. It was like a more light-hearted Bret Easton Ellis (who McInerney references, as well as himself, in true meta-fashion--Ellis actually used McInerney as a character [as well as himself] in "Lunar Park.") The comedy stems from the zany characters themselves, as well as the writing style which is kind of smarmy and smug, but in an entertaining way. The main character, of course, is a 30-year-old man still in an adolescent lifestyle, and the story is that of his wacky New York world--comprised of his model girlfriend, militant vegetarian best friend, anorexic sister, alcoholic parents, etc.--as it begins to collapse around him. My only problem was that it had one of those tacked-on endings where someone dies out of nowhere in a last-ditch attempt at some gravitas in an otherwise fun little romp, kind of like some Wes Anderson movies.
]]> Pissing in the Gene Pool 2711858 96 Henry Rollins 393479002X Patrick 3 2008 3.67 1987 Pissing in the Gene Pool
author: Henry Rollins
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.67
book published: 1987
rating: 3
read at: 2008/12/05
date added: 2008/12/27
shelves: 2008
review:
"A bullet shot at this man would steer clear, knowing that nothing would happen to its target." This immediately reminded me of this line from Chuck Palahniuk's "Survivor:" "Me getting killed right now would be redundant." Another good one: "Sometimes it gets so cold in here I want to build a roaring fire using my body for kindling."
]]> Demons in the Spring 2109935

Oddly modern moments which occur in the most familiar of public places, from offices to airports to schools to zoos to emergency a young girl who refuses to go anywhere unless she’s dressed as a ghost; a bank robbery in Stockholm gone terribly wrong; a teacher who’s become enamored with the students in his school’s Model United Nations club; a couple affected by a strange malady—a miniature city which has begun to develop in the young woman’s chest, these inventive stories are hilarious, heartbreaking, and unusual.


Joe Meno is the best-selling author of the novels Hairstyles of the Damned, The Boy Detective Fails, How the Hula Girl Sings, and Tender As Hellfire. He was the winner of the 2003 Nelson Algren Award for short fiction and is a professor of creative writing at Columbia College Chicago.

*A portion of the author's proceeds from the book will go directly to benefit 826 CHICAGO, a nonprofit tutoring center, part of the national organization of tutoring centers with branches in San Francisco, Los Angeles, New York City, and Seattle.*
Ěý±Ő±Ő> 300 Joe Meno 193335447X Patrick 3 2008 4.06 2008 Demons in the Spring
author: Joe Meno
name: Patrick
average rating: 4.06
book published: 2008
rating: 3
read at: 2008/12/15
date added: 2008/12/27
shelves: 2008
review:
These short stories mainly have a collective theme of loss, mourning, or emptiness, and many also have a surrealistic quality that is somehow streamlined effortlessly into the story and doesn't jar or come across as Sci-Fi. My personal favorite was "My Brother and the Unabomber," in which the narrator gives an account of life with a violent, emotionally disturbed family member. "Art School is Boring So" and "What a Schoolgirl You Are" are also standouts, but there weren't many I didn't enjoy.
]]> <![CDATA[Lady Q: The Rise and Fall of a Latin Queen]]> 2284976 288 Reymundo Sánchez 1556527225 Patrick 1 2008 4.19 2008 Lady Q: The Rise and Fall of a Latin Queen
author: Reymundo Sánchez
name: Patrick
average rating: 4.19
book published: 2008
rating: 1
read at: 2008/12/14
date added: 2008/12/27
shelves: 2008
review:
The girl this is about says something in the afterward about how she hopes that it could help just one person, etc., but you can't help anyone if they're too bored to finish your story. There is not a whole lot devoted to her actual experiences as a high-ranking member of the Chicago street gang, this is more of a portrait of an abused, impoverished single mother in the city, and not a very good one at that. Reymundo Sanchez who interviewed Lady Q for the book, previously wrote his own autobiography, "My Bloody Life," which is a lot better.
]]> <![CDATA[High Adventure in the Great Outdoors]]> 581765 Book by Rollins 144 Henry Rollins 1880985020 Patrick 3 2008
"A densely packed tome to keep the blood thin and the mind clear when enduring a long night of solitary refinement. Don't hitchhike solo on the highway to the great abyss. No need to sail alone through the stormy sea of your self-pity. When you need to wallow in the mire of your existence with a fellow self-obsessed insomnia-ridden megalomaniac and your friends no longer pick up the phone when you call, reach for this book."]]> 3.77 1990 High Adventure in the Great Outdoors
author: Henry Rollins
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.77
book published: 1990
rating: 3
read at:
date added: 2008/12/27
shelves: 2008
review:
These early books--with their short bursts of autobiography, fictional snippets, bad poetry, and random thoughts--are starting to grow on me. Maybe a bit juvenile in their unfocused rage, but that makes them really cathartic to pick up if you happen to be in a particularly foul mood. The author puts it best on the back cover of his collection, "The First Five:"

"A densely packed tome to keep the blood thin and the mind clear when enduring a long night of solitary refinement. Don't hitchhike solo on the highway to the great abyss. No need to sail alone through the stormy sea of your self-pity. When you need to wallow in the mire of your existence with a fellow self-obsessed insomnia-ridden megalomaniac and your friends no longer pick up the phone when you call, reach for this book."
]]> Art to Choke Hearts 2110119 Rare Book 142 Henry Rollins 3934790038 Patrick 2 2008 3.96 1989 Art to Choke Hearts
author: Henry Rollins
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.96
book published: 1989
rating: 2
read at: 2008/12/17
date added: 2008/12/27
shelves: 2008
review:
I think a lot of this was included in the "Portable Rollins" collection that initially turned me off his writing some years ago. Just too repetitive, especially with the overuse of the words "annihilation" and "incineration."
]]> Dolores Claiborne 10625
Aujourd'hui, la vieille dame indigne est à nouveau soupçonnée : la riche et sénile Vera Donovan, dont elle est la gouvernante depuis des décennies, vient d'être découverte morte dans sa demeure.

Seul témoin et seule héritière, Dolores fait figure de coupable idéale. Elle n'a désormais plus le choix : elle doit passer aux aveux. Raconter les étranges phobies qui habitaient sa maîtresse, se souvenir de l'horreur qu'elle a vécu il y a trente ans. Dire toute la vérité : une vérité terrifiante.]]> 324 Stephen King 2266047426 Patrick 4 2008 3.75 1992 Dolores Claiborne
author: Stephen King
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.75
book published: 1992
rating: 4
read at: 2008/12/18
date added: 2008/12/27
shelves: 2008
review:
I was gonna only give this three stars, but then realized there was a stretch of 120 pages I had read in one sitting, so I guess I have to give it props. No boogeymen to be found, which is fine, I knew ahead of time it was just something about a woman murdering her husband (which you find out on page 1). The story isn't all that compelling, but the format of the book is; there are no chapter breaks, it's just one big 300-page confession by the titular character, a typical King small-town woman, complete with Maine dialect, phonetic spelling/abbreviations and all (which is interesting, considering he railed against the notion of purposeful misspelling in "On Writing"). If you like character studies, you can't find much better.
]]> <![CDATA[Clues for Real Life: The Classic Wit & Wisdom of Nancy Drew]]> 2050027 176 Stephanie Karpinske 0696236249 Patrick 3 2008
"When lost in the mountains, try to put on a brave front for morale's sake."

"Posing under empty picture frames to elude a villain is a risky venture!"

"Beware of who you give autographs to--your signature might later be used to forge checks."

***Finished***

The main draw here is obviously the random quotes that are hilarious when removed from their original context, but it also includes a brief history of the series' creation/evolution, and some light-hearted quizzes (none of which I could answer) and the like. Anyway, I don't want to give all of them away but here are a few more.

"Eating can be a fattening hobby."

"If you're taken prisoner, unobtrusively knock off a button so that your rescuers will be better able to trace your whereabouts."

"When threatened with a hairbrush by a vicious woman, remain calm and speak in cold level tones."]]> 3.63 2007 Clues for Real Life: The Classic Wit & Wisdom of Nancy Drew
author: Stephanie Karpinske
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.63
book published: 2007
rating: 3
read at: 2008/11/28
date added: 2008/11/28
shelves: 2008
review:
I'm gonna have to post some quotes as I read this:

"When lost in the mountains, try to put on a brave front for morale's sake."

"Posing under empty picture frames to elude a villain is a risky venture!"

"Beware of who you give autographs to--your signature might later be used to forge checks."

***Finished***

The main draw here is obviously the random quotes that are hilarious when removed from their original context, but it also includes a brief history of the series' creation/evolution, and some light-hearted quizzes (none of which I could answer) and the like. Anyway, I don't want to give all of them away but here are a few more.

"Eating can be a fattening hobby."

"If you're taken prisoner, unobtrusively knock off a button so that your rescuers will be better able to trace your whereabouts."

"When threatened with a hairbrush by a vicious woman, remain calm and speak in cold level tones."
]]> When I Grow Up 4009145 336 Juliana Hatfield 0470189592 Patrick 5 2008 3.62 2008 When I Grow Up
author: Juliana Hatfield
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.62
book published: 2008
rating: 5
read at: 2008/11/26
date added: 2008/11/28
shelves: 2008
review:
So I'm not her biggest fan, I only have the "Become What You Are" album, but when I saw she wrote an autobiography, it piqued my curiosity, and my expectations were EXTREMELY exceeded. I had no idea she was capable of something this interesting and insightful. The chapters alternate from daily journal entries on her then-current tour and a history of her rise to semi-prominence with the hit single, "My Sister." A lot of the writing isn't even about music, it's just biographical musings from a fellow lone wolf. Juliana describes the highs and lows of touring, the joy of writing a song, depression, the futility of love/relationships (especially with musicians with addiction problems), eating disorders, stalkers, diminishing audiences, annoying promoters, etc. She dishes, disses, and dismisses some of her contemporaries (not always naming names, which was annoying), calls out the evils of the major labels, Clinton's corporate-media-consolidating Telecommunications Act, and Clear Channel, this book covers a lot of interesting subjects. There's even a chapter just on how much she liked the Replacements/Paul Westerberg. A must-read for any Gen Xers who came of age during the "alt-rock boom" of the 90's. I liked this so much I would rank it among my favorites documenting that period--"Our Band Could be Your Life: Scenes from the American Indie Underground 1981-1991," "Route 666: On the Road to Nirvana," and "Fool the World: An Oral History of the Pixies."
]]> The World of Edward Gorey 503675 192 Clifford Ross 0810939886 Patrick 3 2008 4.23 1996 The World of Edward Gorey
author: Clifford Ross
name: Patrick
average rating: 4.23
book published: 1996
rating: 3
read at:
date added: 2008/11/28
shelves: 2008
review:

]]> <![CDATA[Sweetheart (Archie Sheridan & Gretchen Lowell, #2)]]> 2983654

Portland detective Archie Sheridan, the former head of the Beauty Killer Task Force, hunted Gretchen Lowell for years before she kidnapped him, tortured him, and then let him go. Now that she is behind bars, Archie is finally piecing his life back together. He's returned home to his ex-wife and their two children. But no matter how hard Archie tries, he just can't stop thinking about Gretchen!

When the body of a young woman is discovered in Forest Park, Archie is reminded of the first corpse he discovered there a decade ago: it turned out to be the Beauty Killer's first victim, and Archie's first case. Then, the unthinkable happens: Gretchen escapes from prison, and once the news breaks, all of Portland goes on high alert; but secretly, Archie is relieved. He knows he's the only one who can capture Gretchen and now he has a plan to get out from under her thumb once and for all. Even if it means becoming her last victim!

]]> 325 Chelsea Cain 031236847X Patrick 3 2008 4.05 2008 Sweetheart (Archie Sheridan & Gretchen Lowell, #2)
author: Chelsea Cain
name: Patrick
average rating: 4.05
book published: 2008
rating: 3
read at: 2008/11/18
date added: 2008/11/18
shelves: 2008
review:

]]> Ghosts/Aliens 4449177
Well, listen to this. On Saturday, March 8, at 7:12 p.m., Trey Hamburger heard a second hand account of a teleporting Hot Pocket and started wiggin' out bad. So he and his amigo Mike Stevens basically went into combat mode and ended up encountering some of the most seriously messed-up shit ever. And they're STILL FREAKED OUT ABOUT IT. Now, even though these guys aren't SCIENTISTS, it's pretty for sure that they might have extrapolated something HUGE, which will have the intellectual community going nuts for weeks.

This is their story.

Ghost/Aliens is probably the first time ever a regular person has investigated this sort of thing. So now the people of planet Earth will finally know the truth about all those levitating towels and dead grandpas popping up all over the place.]]> 251 Trey Hamburger 0307407306 Patrick 5 2008 hard. Robert Hamburger's (of "Real Ultimate Power" fame) older cousin investigates a mysterious paranormal conspiracy that starts with a Hot Pocket that moved... on it's own. If you're familiar with the "Jim Anchower" columnist from "The Onion," imagine that type of narrator in a would-be "X-Files" novel. There are lines like, "I once lived in a duplex that had to be blessed," and "Some idiots out there think that Transylvania is really just Pennsylvania."

***Finished***

I cannot recommend this highly enough, four times yesterday I was laughing to myself sitting alone at Barnes and Noble reading lines like, "In Cambodia, you can throw a grenade at water buffaloes for FIVE BUCKS." If you are interested in gurgling sounds, opening a portal to time/space, or face-punchings, you must read this book.]]> 3.82 2008 Ghosts/Aliens
author: Trey Hamburger
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.82
book published: 2008
rating: 5
read at: 2008/11/09
date added: 2008/11/09
shelves: 2008
review:
This is making me laugh, hard. Robert Hamburger's (of "Real Ultimate Power" fame) older cousin investigates a mysterious paranormal conspiracy that starts with a Hot Pocket that moved... on it's own. If you're familiar with the "Jim Anchower" columnist from "The Onion," imagine that type of narrator in a would-be "X-Files" novel. There are lines like, "I once lived in a duplex that had to be blessed," and "Some idiots out there think that Transylvania is really just Pennsylvania."

***Finished***

I cannot recommend this highly enough, four times yesterday I was laughing to myself sitting alone at Barnes and Noble reading lines like, "In Cambodia, you can throw a grenade at water buffaloes for FIVE BUCKS." If you are interested in gurgling sounds, opening a portal to time/space, or face-punchings, you must read this book.
]]> Sliver 32875 AN UPTOWN HIGH-RISE
A glittering Manhattan "sliver" building.
A successful single career woman.
A shocking secret hidden in brick and concrete.

A HIGH-TECH NIGHTMARE
Someone is watching her.
He watches her unpack, watches her make the bed; his eyes are everywhere.
He owns the building: now he owns her.

SLIVER
There's no place more frightening than home.]]> 261 Ira Levin 0553295071 Patrick 2 2008 3.20 1991 Sliver
author: Ira Levin
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.20
book published: 1991
rating: 2
read at: 2008/11/04
date added: 2008/11/04
shelves: 2008
review:

]]> <![CDATA[Rosemary’s Baby (Rosemary's Baby, #1)]]> 228296
Suppose that only after you became pregnant did you begin to suspect the building harbored a diabolically evil group of devil worshippers who had mastered the arts of black magic and witchcraft.

Suppose that this satanic conspiracy set out to claim not only your husband but your baby.

Well, that's what happened to Rosemary... Or did it...?]]> 308 Ira Levin 0451194004 Patrick 3 2008 4.04 1967 Rosemary’s Baby (Rosemary's Baby, #1)
author: Ira Levin
name: Patrick
average rating: 4.04
book published: 1967
rating: 3
read at: 2008/11/01
date added: 2008/11/02
shelves: 2008
review:

]]> <![CDATA[The Sandman: The Dream Hunters]]> 166580
Like most fables, the story begins with a wager between two jealous animals, a fox and a badger: which of them can drive a young monk from his solitary temple? The winner will make the temple into a new fox or badger home. But as the fox adopts the form of a woman to woo the monk from his hermitage, she falls in love with him. Meanwhile, in far away Kyoto, the wealthy Master of Yin-Yang, the onmyoji, is plagued by his fears and seeks tranquility in his command of sorcery. He learns of the monk and his inner peace; he dispatches demons to plague the monk in his dreams and eventually kill him to bring his peace to the onmyoji. The fox overhears the demons on their way to the monk and begins her struggle to save the man whom at first she so envied.

Dream Hunters is a beautiful package. From the ink-brush painted endpapers to the luminous page layouts--including Amano's gate-fold painting of Morpheus in a sea of reds, oranges, and violets--this book has been crafted for a sensuous reading experience. Gaiman has developed as a prose stylist in the last several years with novels and stories such as Neverwhere and Stardust, and his narrative rings with a sense of timelessness and magic that gently sustains this adult fairy tale. The only disappointment here is that the book is so brief. One could imagine this creative team being even better suited to a longer story of more epic proportions. On the final page of Dream Hunters, in fact, Amano suggest that he will collaborate further with Mr. Gaiman in the future. Readers of Dream Hunters will hope that Amano's dream comes true. --Patrick O'Kelley]]> 128 Neil Gaiman 1840232048 Patrick 2 2008 4.41 1999 The Sandman: The Dream Hunters
author: Neil Gaiman
name: Patrick
average rating: 4.41
book published: 1999
rating: 2
read at: 2008/10/20
date added: 2008/10/28
shelves: 2008
review:
Gaiman (barely) re-visits our friend Dream in this interpretation of an old Japanese myth. Each page of his text is complimented by a painting, drawing, or mixed-media piece by an amazing Japanese artist named Yoshitaka Amano, but the story didn't really hold me at all.
]]> Valencia 115009 216 Michelle Tea 1580050352 Patrick 4 2008 3.79 2000 Valencia
author: Michelle Tea
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.79
book published: 2000
rating: 4
read at: 2008/10/27
date added: 2008/10/28
shelves: 2008
review:
This is a memoir of a 25-year-old lesbian in '90s San Francisco documenting her times drinking, not working, and having a lot of latex-gloved sex with various girls. It's plotlessness really worked for me, and I figured out it was because Tea is completely honest as an autobiographer. This became apparent when I was planning on thinking she was pretentious, and that never coming to be. I assumed she was going to try and make herself sound really hip, being a counterculture woman swinging in one of the most liberal cities in America, but she basically just told it like it was. A lot of times in memoirs, the writer will over-dramatize their situation, like how they hit rock bottom and almost died eight times or whatever, but again Tea doesn't force the issue of making herself seem really down, or really cool. So that's how I decided the slice-of-life material was authentic. Just one person's account of looking for love in bars and parties. Also she's talented in her own right, there were plenty of creative, non-cliche metaphors and good one-liners to be found. One thing that irked me was constant references to astrological signs? Anyways, this book was a pleasant surprise. My roommate had it assigned to her for school and I just happened to keep reading it after she told me to read a particularly tasteful few pages at the beginning, describing your typical girl-on-girl fist-fuck.
]]> X-Men: Smoke and Mirrors 1915661 Vintage paperback 341 Eluki bes Shahar 0425171256 Patrick 1 2008 3.43 1997 X-Men: Smoke and Mirrors
author: Eluki bes Shahar
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.43
book published: 1997
rating: 1
read at: 2008/09/10
date added: 2008/10/27
shelves: 2008
review:
This book really pissed me off, as both a man, and a human being. There are a lot of great characters in the X-Men world to choose from if you're writing a book, and the selection here is fine, Cyclops, Jean Grey, Storm, Professor X, Wolverine, Rogue, and Gambit. The problem is that the writer takes the needless and offensive liberty of creating her own little team of suburban teenage mutants who call themselves "The Ohio Mutant Conspiracy," with horrible names like Pipedream, Rewind, and Slapshot. It would've been fine if they were just bit players in peril for the real team to rescue, but they were used way too much, as major characters, and overshadowed the people who the book is titled for. I got so annoyed that I just started skipping over the many long chapters with them, until I got near the end and realized most of them had been killed off. Then I had to go back and read the parts I missed just because I wanted to see them die. The villain of the book is Mr. Sinister, who is manipulating things from behind the scenes most of the way, which is fine because that's his style, but when he actually shows up at the climax, it's pretty underwhelming. Anyway, I'm starting to sound like Pierre from Conan O'Brien, but I read another X-Men novel before this called "The Return" by Chris Roberson which was actually pretty cool, especially compared to this dud.
]]> <![CDATA[Candy Girl: A Year in the Life of an Unlikely Stripper]]> 29486 The Late Show to be the pick of “Dave’s Book Club 2006,� Candy Girl is the story of a young writer who dared to bare it all as a stripper. At the age of twenty-four, Diablo Cody decided there had to be more to life than typing copy at an ad agency. She soon managed to find inspiration from a most unlikely source� amateur night at the seedy Skyway Lounge. While she doesn’t take home the prize that night, Diablo discovers to her surprise the act of stripping is an absolute thrill. This is Diablo’s captivating fish-out-of-water story of her yearlong walk on the wild side, from quiet gentlemen’s clubs to multilevel sex palaces and glassed-in peep shows. In witty prose she gives readers a behind-the-scenes look at this industry through a writer’s keen eye, chronicling her descent into the skin trade and the effect it had on her self-image and her relationship with her now husband.

]]> 212 Diablo Cody 1592402739 Patrick 5 2008 3.57 2005 Candy Girl: A Year in the Life of an Unlikely Stripper
author: Diablo Cody
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.57
book published: 2005
rating: 5
read at:
date added: 2008/10/27
shelves: 2008
review:
Cody's writing is funny to me in the same way as Chelsea Handler's books, or even the stand-up comedy of Dane Cook, in that the stories they tell aren't necessarily funny, but the way they're told, the delivery itself, makes them exceptional. Word choices, phrasing, going out of your way to make everything count and pack as much punch as possible into each sentence, casting all generic bits to the side. I just like people who put forth a lot of effort to amuse me, and squeeze whatever humor they can out of everything they write about. I especially like that she makes up her own terms, such as "clit-pink," "stunt-cunt," and "sales-gays." She makes a lot of literary and pop-culture references like these: "There was a sinewy Russian girl onstage, a trained ballerina who whirled in reckless circles as though the grand prize for effort was a Baptist's severed head," and, "I ordered a vodka Red Bull: upper meets downer in an effervescent hybrid of bubble gum and junkie piss." If you don't think that's funny, then fuck you. What about this: "She was healthy. Cheap. She looked like she'd spent the day roller-skating at the beach, then accidentally pitched face-first into a vat of Bonne Belle warpaint." Or this: "Vagina going once, going twice... SOLD to the fellow in the Timberwolves cap and the Manwich-stained fleece pullover!" Here, read this and tell me if you think it's funny: "I spotted a blonde girl working the floor in an outfit so tight I could clearly see her nipples, labia, individual goose bumps, hair follicles and DNA helix." If that didn't make you at least chuckle inside your head, we will never be friends and you can suck it hard. As an added bonus, there is plenty of dirt on the seedy inner-workings of the Minneapolis world of stripclubs, but the topic itself was probably just chosen because it made easy fodder as a vehicle for Cody's wit. Anyway, she's originally from Chicago, so I was happy to see her win the screenplay Oscar, even though my niece said she was putting herself on suicide watch if "Juno" won best picture.
]]> Shopgirl 10873
With more than 340,000 copies in print, Steve Martin's Shopgirl has landed on bestseller lists nationwide including: New York Times, Publishers Weekly, USA Today, Wall Street Journal, San Francisco Chronicle, Washington Post, and Los Angeles Times.

Filled with the kind of witty, discerning observations that have brought Steve Martin incredible critical success, this story of modern day love and romance is a work of disarming tenderness.]]> 130 Steve Martin 0786891076 Patrick 4 2008 3.42 2000 Shopgirl
author: Steve Martin
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.42
book published: 2000
rating: 4
read at: 2008/08/29
date added: 2008/10/27
shelves: 2008
review:
Melancholy without being depressing, if that makes sense. Steve Martin takes advantage of the third-person omniscient narrator and gets in everyone's head, but keeps enough distance that it sounds almost like the voice-over from a documentary film, which I really enjoyed. The story is a romance between a young woman and a rich older man, which wouldn't normally interest me except for my curiosity about a comedian writing serious fiction.
]]> The Book of Lists: Horror 3049159 The Book of Lists: Horror offers a blood-feast of forbidden knowledge that horror fans are hungry to devour, including:

Stephen King's Ten Favorite Horror Novels or Short Stories—learn what scares the master!
Top Six Grossing Horror Movies of All Time in the United States� which big shocks translated into big bucks?
Top Ten Horror-Themed Rock 'n' Roll Songs—maybe it is devil's music' after all!
And much, much more!

Drawing on its authors' extensive knowledge and contributions from the (living) legends and greatest names in the horror and dark fantasy genres, The Book of Lists: Horror is a scream—an irresistible compendium of all things mysterious, terrifying, and gory . . . and so entertaining, it's scary!

]]> 410 Amy Wallace 0061537268 Patrick 5 2008 3.85 2008 The Book of Lists: Horror
author: Amy Wallace
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.85
book published: 2008
rating: 5
read at: 2008/10/24
date added: 2008/10/24
shelves: 2008
review:

]]> Mike's Election Guide 2008 3520503
After a diastrous war, the failure to catch bin Laden, millions of families who have lost their homes, the Katrina debacle, soaring gas prices feeding record oil company profits, and the largest national debt caused by the biggest spending and borrowing administration in American history, the country has had it with conservatives, right-wingers and Republicans. A thrilling election season is now upon us. Obama vs. McCain. One candidate has promised a presidency different from any other, one that will take us forward to embrace the hope of the 21st century. The other candidate says he has no idea how to use a computer.

Welcome to MIKE'S ELECTION GUIDE -- Michael Moore's effort to make sense of the this fall's race for the White House and Congress. In it, Moore answers the nation's most pressing "Why is John McCain so angry?," "Do the Democrats Still Drink from a Sippy Cup and Sleep with the Light On?," Can I get into the Electoral College with only a 2.0 gpa?" and "How many Democrats does it take to lose the most winnable election in American history?"

It's a great year to be an American and a voter. Don't miss out on all the fun! And don't miss out on MIKE'S ELECTION GUIDE -- it's the indispensable book that belongs in every American's back pocket this season.]]> 272 Michael Moore 0446546275 Patrick 3 2008 3.35 2008 Mike's Election Guide 2008
author: Michael Moore
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.35
book published: 2008
rating: 3
read at: 2008/08/26
date added: 2008/10/18
shelves: 2008
review:
Funny and informative as usual, I just don't get why he started backing Democrats now, even though they're worse than when he began dissing them. I have been bringing up "socialized police" and "socialized fire departments" anytime someone balks at the idea of free health care, so that's the best thing I took away from this. Also, did you know that every other fucking country has their elections on the weekend? One of Mike's "Ten Decrees for the First Ten Days in Office" if Obama wins, is to have a train of Bushco's rogue's gallery brought out of the White House in handcuffs, but that will never happen. Anyways, you probably know if you're the type of person who would read this or not. And if you are, I urge you to vote third party because, seriously, look at Obama's voting record, he's a sheep in wolf's clothing, just like Kerry and Gore before him. Republicans aren't the whole problem, the "left" being complicit with them is.
]]> The Stranger 49552 The Stranger has long been considered a classic of twentieth-century literature. Le Monde ranks it as number one on its "100 Books of the Century" list. Through this story of an ordinary man unwittingly drawn into a senseless murder on a sundrenched Algerian beach, Camus explores what he termed "the nakedness of man faced with the absurd."]]> 123 Albert Camus Patrick 5 2008 4.04 1942 The Stranger
author: Albert Camus
name: Patrick
average rating: 4.04
book published: 1942
rating: 5
read at: 2008/08/20
date added: 2008/10/18
shelves: 2008
review:
This really blew my mind and made me wish they made us read stuff like this in high school, instead of bullshit classics like "The Great Gatsby" which I read around the same time. I don't know if it was because of the translation from French, but the overall tone is really detached, which compliments the character of the narrator and the type of person he is slowly revealed to be. A lot of times I perceive black humor where none exists, or where a serious idea is intended, but this book has two of the funnier passages I've come across recently. The first was when his girlfriend asks him if he loves her, the second is when his lawyer first talks to him after his arrest, and what was said about his mood at his mother's wake. If you have read it but don't remember those parts, ask me. Fun fact: this book was the inspiration for the song "Killing an Arab" by the Cure.
]]> I Wanna Be Your Joey Ramone 2207115 A raw, edgy, emotional novel about growing up punk and living to tell.

The Clash. Social Distortion. Dead Kennedys. Patti Smith. The Ramones. Punk rock is in Emily Black's blood. Her mother, Louisa, hit the road to follow the incendiary music scene when Emily was four months old and never came back. Now Emily's all grown up with a punk band of her own, determined to find the tune that will bring her mother home. Because if Louisa really is following the music, shouldn't it lead her right back to Emily?]]> 352 Stephanie Kuehnert 1416562699 Patrick 1 2008 3.61 2008 I Wanna Be Your Joey Ramone
author: Stephanie Kuehnert
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.61
book published: 2008
rating: 1
read at: 2008/08/01
date added: 2008/10/18
shelves: 2008
review:
Not sure whether to give this the highest or lowest rating because it should get props for being one of the worst things I've ever read, like a literary mix of the movies "Showgirls," "Crossroads" (Britney Spears, not Ralph Macchio), and "Prey for Rock n' Roll" (Gina Gershon in a rock band). The story is about a teenage girl in Nowhereseville, USA, and her dreams of making it big in her pop-punk trio. It reads as a checklist of plot points from a made-for-tv movie on the Lifetime network, featuring such obligatory cliches as: rape, miscarriage, abusive boyfriend, (short-lived) drug addiction, abandonment by mother, etc. There is a ton of awkward phrasing and attempts to use musical terms as metaphors that all made me really uncomfortable and I had to keep reading. Kuehnert has a minimal knowledge of rock music and equipment jargon which becomes painfully obvious whenever she attempts to use them, usually out of context, and anyone who knows what she is attempting to say will be embarrassed. I feel like at some point someone must have said to her, "This is a whammy bar," and she immediately thought she should compare it to an emotion and put it in her book. I bet if someone explained a Spanish soap opera to me it would turn out a lot like this book. Another thing that made me uncomfortable was the repetition of the phrases "rock god" and "my music." I'm shivering just remembering it. It felt like a YA book, and very well might have been mis-categorized in Borders, but that wouldn't make it ok.
]]> The Old Man and the Sea 2165 Librarian's note: An alternate cover edition can be found here

This short novel, already a modern classic, is the superbly told, tragic story of a Cuban fisherman in the Gulf Stream and the giant Marlin he kills and loses—specifically referred to in the citation accompanying the author's Nobel Prize for literature in 1954.]]> 96 Ernest Hemingway 0684830493 Patrick 1 2008 3.81 1952 The Old Man and the Sea
author: Ernest Hemingway
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.81
book published: 1952
rating: 1
read at: 2008/08/19
date added: 2008/10/18
shelves: 2008
review:
Not really my bag. I did like the line about how if the other fishermen saw him talking to himself, they would think he was crazy, but he doesn't care because he knows he's not.
]]> Fahrenheit 451 4381 158 Ray Bradbury 0307347974 Patrick 3 2008 3.96 1953 Fahrenheit 451
author: Ray Bradbury
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.96
book published: 1953
rating: 3
read at: 2008/08/23
date added: 2008/10/18
shelves: 2008
review:
I would describe it as a poor-man's "1984," which I still consider a compliment.
]]> <![CDATA[The Score: How the Quest for Sex has Shaped the Modern Man]]> 2022903 224 Faye Flam 1583333126 Patrick 4 2008
1. Certain bees explode after leaving their penis inside their mate.
2. What do seals, walruses, polar bears, and bats all have in common? A penis bone.
3. Mushrooms don't just limit themselves to male vs. female, they have over 30,000 sexes.
4. The giant squid pierces the female's tentacle with his penis, which is often bitten off by the female's beak.
5. Penguins=no weiner.
6. Flatworms have caustic semen that burns holes in its lover. I want that.
7. Sea slugs have a built-in date-rape drug. Sexy.
8. Female chimps can take on 30 dicks a day.
9. Fly sperm cells are 100 times longer than humans.
10. Back in the day, to combat masturbation, young boys were wrapped in wet blankets, had electro-shocks on the testicles, and even got their manhood caged into some device that triggered an alarm if they got an erection!? True story. So ladies, don't come complaining to me about your female circumcision and your missing clit and all that boo-hooing.

Bonus! In DaVinci's time, the common belief was that sperm was produced in the brain, then traveled down the spine and out the penis.

This book almost made me believe in evolution because the entire premise of the book assumes that every organism in the world is a result of it, but I still don't know.]]> 3.47 2008 The Score: How the Quest for Sex has Shaped the Modern Man
author: Faye Flam
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.47
book published: 2008
rating: 4
read at: 2008/09/06
date added: 2008/10/18
shelves: 2008
review:
Top Ten Fun Facts I Learned from Fancy Faye Flam:

1. Certain bees explode after leaving their penis inside their mate.
2. What do seals, walruses, polar bears, and bats all have in common? A penis bone.
3. Mushrooms don't just limit themselves to male vs. female, they have over 30,000 sexes.
4. The giant squid pierces the female's tentacle with his penis, which is often bitten off by the female's beak.
5. Penguins=no weiner.
6. Flatworms have caustic semen that burns holes in its lover. I want that.
7. Sea slugs have a built-in date-rape drug. Sexy.
8. Female chimps can take on 30 dicks a day.
9. Fly sperm cells are 100 times longer than humans.
10. Back in the day, to combat masturbation, young boys were wrapped in wet blankets, had electro-shocks on the testicles, and even got their manhood caged into some device that triggered an alarm if they got an erection!? True story. So ladies, don't come complaining to me about your female circumcision and your missing clit and all that boo-hooing.

Bonus! In DaVinci's time, the common belief was that sperm was produced in the brain, then traveled down the spine and out the penis.

This book almost made me believe in evolution because the entire premise of the book assumes that every organism in the world is a result of it, but I still don't know.
]]> <![CDATA[Dork Whore: My Travels Through Asia as a Twenty-Year-Old Pseudo-Virgin]]> 293978
Dork Whore is a fresh and funny memoir about a young woman whose quirky personality and embarrassing neuroses always seem to get in the way of her getting what she wants. As Iris lands in hotel rooms in Bangkok, rides scooters out of opium-fogged compounds hidden in the jungle, and antagonizes an impromptu tour group in Vietnam, she begins to realize that the greatest obstacle she'll have to overcome isn't losing her virginity, but coming to terms with the reasons for her need to be accepted. Poignant, hilarious, and always original, Dork Whore is a remarkable mix of bawdy humor and heartbreaking moments, witty intelligence and touching personal discoveries. Iris Bahr has given us an unforgettable coming-of-age tale about how a young woman finally learns how to trust others--and her own judgment.]]> 224 Iris Bahr 1596912340 Patrick 2 2008 3.34 2007 Dork Whore: My Travels Through Asia as a Twenty-Year-Old Pseudo-Virgin
author: Iris Bahr
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.34
book published: 2007
rating: 2
read at: 2008/08/08
date added: 2008/10/18
shelves: 2008
review:
Memoir of a 20-year-old woman fresh out of the mandatory Israeli army, taking a vacation throughout Asia while trying to lose her virginity. There were a lot of funny, no-shame moments, and Iris herself was charming, but that only lasted about halfway through the 200-page book, which isn't long. The highlights for me were her numerous bouts with digestive tract parasites and the wacky bathroom hijinks caused by them, and the names she calls her intact hymen, such as "bio-barrier," "fem-fence," hoohaa hedge," and "poonani portal."
]]> <![CDATA[Ask a Ninja Presents The Ninja Handbook: This Book Looks Forward to Killing You Soon]]> 3004130
Carefully consider the joy of your soft-headed ignorance before you begin to run, flip, and jump along the Ninja Path.
ĚýĚý
After much debate and in a spirit of morbid amusement, the International Order of Ninjas has chosen to produce The Ninja Handbook , the first-ever secret ninja training guide specifically designed for the non-ninja.
Most non-ninjas who handle these delicate, deadly pages will die–probably in an elaborately horrific and painful manner. But whether your journey lasts five seconds or five days or (rather inconceivably) five years, all those who bravely take up this text and follow the tenets and trials laid out within will die knowing they were as ninja as they possibly could’ve been.

For the true of heart or the extremely lucky, this powerful and honorable manuscript contains such phenomenal ninja wisdom

•How to create and name your very own lethal ninja clan
•The proper weapon to use when fighting a vampire pumpkin
•Why clowns and robots are so dangerous on the Internet
•Easy-to-follow charts showing when to slice and when to stab
•How to execute such ultradeadly kicks as the Driving Miss Daisy
•Why pretty much every ninja movie ever made sucks
•How to make a shoggoth explode using well-placed foliage
•What the heck a shoggoth is and why you’ll need to make it explode
•Death Aide certification
•And much more ninjafied enlightenment on every shuriken-sharp page!

People do not take the Path, the Path takes people.]]> 325 Kent Nichols 030740580X Patrick 5 2008 3.64 2008 Ask a Ninja Presents The Ninja Handbook: This Book Looks Forward to Killing You Soon
author: Kent Nichols
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.64
book published: 2008
rating: 5
read at: 2008/10/14
date added: 2008/10/14
shelves: 2008
review:

]]> <![CDATA[The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time]]> 1618 226 Mark Haddon 1400032717 Patrick 3 2008 3.89 2003 The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time
author: Mark Haddon
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.89
book published: 2003
rating: 3
read at: 2008/10/14
date added: 2008/10/14
shelves: 2008
review:

]]> <![CDATA["Then Ditka Said to Payton. . .": The Best Chicago Bears Stories Ever Told]]> 2376671 192 Dan Jiggetts 1572439858 Patrick 2 2008 3.60 2008 "Then Ditka Said to Payton. . .": The Best Chicago Bears Stories Ever Told
author: Dan Jiggetts
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.60
book published: 2008
rating: 2
read at: 2008/09/17
date added: 2008/10/10
shelves: 2008
review:
This title was very misleading, it should've used the words "lackluster" or "average" stories. There aren't a lot of exciting stories from games, it's just some boring factoids and non-ectotes. There are a ton of good stories I can remember just since 2001 or so and none of them are touched on; this book is a dud. Another book came out at the same time, called something like "The greatest Plays in Bears History" or something, so maybe that's more big-moment/eye-witness-oriented, I'll have to check it out. Mike Ditka's "In life, First You Kick Ass" is a perfect example of what a successful book in this style should be. I am not a meathead, by the way.
]]> X-Men: The Ultimate Guide 365482 192 Peter Sanderson 0756620058 Patrick 4 2008 4.20 2000 X-Men: The Ultimate Guide
author: Peter Sanderson
name: Patrick
average rating: 4.20
book published: 2000
rating: 4
read at: 2008/07/29
date added: 2008/10/10
shelves: 2008
review:
This is a big, picture-filled encylopedia on Marvel's Merry Mutants organized in two-page spreads on heroes, villains, places, and events, all in chronological order of appearance. It was funtastic.
]]> <![CDATA[Forrest Gump (Forrest Gump, #1)]]> 186190 248 Winston Groom 0743453255 Patrick 3 2008 4.06 1986 Forrest Gump (Forrest Gump, #1)
author: Winston Groom
name: Patrick
average rating: 4.06
book published: 1986
rating: 3
read at: 2008/09/25
date added: 2008/10/10
shelves: 2008
review:
This was recommended by a friend who said it was a lot different than the movie (which I always liked for some reason), and it is definitely more overtly funny and less "heartwarming." Lt. Dan has a smaller part than in the film and is more or less replaced by a gorilla. It dragged a little during the sections where Forrest is marooned on an island of cannibals and where he becomes a professional wrestler. Enjoyable, fast read from Forrest's first-person perspective, with a lot of satircal humor on U.S history from the 50's-80's.
]]> <![CDATA[A Dull Roar: What I Did on My Summer Deracination 2006]]> 2597669 272 Henry Rollins 1880985799 Patrick 3 2008 3.92 2006 A Dull Roar: What I Did on My Summer Deracination 2006
author: Henry Rollins
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.92
book published: 2006
rating: 3
read at: 2008/08/15
date added: 2008/10/07
shelves: 2008
review:
Diary of a few months in '06 as Hank muses on life while working on the second season of his tv show on IFC, his radio show, acting in the movie "Wrong Turn 2," and the Rollins Band reunion tour. As usual, plenty of insights on the hard truths of existence mixed with passages that make you really think he needs to lighten up just a little, or at least take a five-minute break. Also, isn't keeping a running list of what you eat/exercise every day a sign of anorexia?
]]> The Great Gatsby 4671 The only edition of the beloved classic that is authorized by Fitzgerald’s family and from his lifelong publisher.

This edition is the enduring original text, updated with the author’s own revisions, a foreword by his granddaughter, and with a new introduction by National Book Award winner Jesmyn Ward.

The Great Gatsby, F. Scott Fitzgerald’s third book, stands as the supreme achievement of his career. First published by Scribner in 1925, this quintessential novel of the Jazz Age has been acclaimed by generations of readers. The story of the mysteriously wealthy Jay Gatsby and his love for the beautiful Daisy Buchanan is an exquisitely crafted tale of America in the 1920s.]]> 180 F. Scott Fitzgerald 0743273567 Patrick 1 2008 3.93 1925 The Great Gatsby
author: F. Scott Fitzgerald
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.93
book published: 1925
rating: 1
read at: 2008/08/30
date added: 2008/10/07
shelves: 2008
review:
He should have called it "Desperate House-Husbands." What? This is a classic? Fuck Fitzgerald, fuck the roaring 20's, and FUCK YOU.
]]> <![CDATA[Happy Endings: The Tales of a Meaty-Breasted Zilc]]> 851944 233 Jim Norton 1416950222 Patrick 3 2008 3.74 2007 Happy Endings: The Tales of a Meaty-Breasted Zilc
author: Jim Norton
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.74
book published: 2007
rating: 3
read at: 2008/09/24
date added: 2008/10/07
shelves: 2008
review:
I had never heard of Norton, his stand-up was recommended by a friend, but this is definitely a funny collection of barely-essays. It's extremely offensive; in the author's own words, "If it weren't for prostitutes, shit, and fat girls, this book would be eight pages long." But he works hard to find new ways to say dirty things, and I respect that.
]]> <![CDATA[Nick & Norah's Infinite Playlist]]> 25373
This he said/she said romance told by YA stars Rachel Cohn and David Levithan is a sexy, funny roller coaster of a story about one date over one very long night, with two teenagers, both recovering from broken hearts, who are just trying to figure out who they want to be- and where the next great band is playing.

Told in alternating chapters, teeming with music references, humor, angst, and endearing side characters, this is a love story you'll wish were your very own. Working together for the first time, Rachel Cohn and David Levithan have combined forces to create a book that is sure to grab readers of all ages and never let them go.]]> 183 Rachel Cohn 0375835318 Patrick 1 2008 3.71 2006 Nick & Norah's Infinite Playlist
author: Rachel Cohn
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.71
book published: 2006
rating: 1
read at: 2008/10/01
date added: 2008/10/07
shelves: 2008
review:
I'm sure the movie version will be good, Michael Cera seems to be able to make anything funny, but this book suffered from trying way to hard to be hip and appeal to its young audience. Granted, I'm 11 years removed from legally being able to read Young Adult fiction, but I would have felt condescended to. I agree with a goodreads friend that the overuse of the word "fuck" and "fucking" as an adjective was extremely annoying (even for typically potty-mouthed teens). Something that always bothers me is when current teens are portrayed as being into music that they wouldn't actually like, as if there is no modern music made that kids would like; the creators are projecting their own youthful tastes on the characters and it always takes me out of the moment. (See also: "Juno." There is no 16-year-old girl out there who wants to talk to me about Italian horror director Dario Argento, trust me, I've tried to find her.) Anyways, by the time the male author (it is cowritten with a woman who does Norah's narration and vice-versa) gets past the trying-to-be-cool and goes for some actual insightful exploration of adolescent heartbreak or whatever, its too late to save the book, the book dies.
]]> <![CDATA[My Custom Van: And 50 Other Mind-Blowing Essays That Will Blow Your Mind All Over Your Face]]> 2838378 224 Michael Ian Black 1416964053 Patrick 4 2008
10. Maximus Beer
9. DON'T TELL ME TO CALM DOWN!!!
8. How I Might Address My Players at Halftime If I Were a Self-Loathing High School Football Coach in a Game Where We Were Winning 49-3
7. My Custom Van
6. Good Skiing Form
5. A Suicide Note
4. A Series of Letters to the First Girl I Ever Fingered
3. Taco Party
2. Why I Used a Day-Glo Magic Marker to Color My Dick Yellow
1. This is How I Party]]> 3.71 2008 My Custom Van: And 50 Other Mind-Blowing Essays That Will Blow Your Mind All Over Your Face
author: Michael Ian Black
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.71
book published: 2008
rating: 4
read at: 2008/07/24
date added: 2008/07/25
shelves: 2008
review:
My top ten favs:

10. Maximus Beer
9. DON'T TELL ME TO CALM DOWN!!!
8. How I Might Address My Players at Halftime If I Were a Self-Loathing High School Football Coach in a Game Where We Were Winning 49-3
7. My Custom Van
6. Good Skiing Form
5. A Suicide Note
4. A Series of Letters to the First Girl I Ever Fingered
3. Taco Party
2. Why I Used a Day-Glo Magic Marker to Color My Dick Yellow
1. This is How I Party
]]> <![CDATA[X Saves the World: How Generation X Got the Shaft but Can Still Keep Everything from Sucking]]> 1607325 A shrewd and hilarious call to arms for the generation that fell between the cracks

Jammed in between the garish showboating of the baby boomers and the tabloid- trash stunts of the millennials, the discerning generation that gave us Yahoo! and Nirvana has been quietly and inexorably changing the face of American culture. The men and women who came of age in the era of Lollapalooza have been underrepresented for too long in pop sociology, but reporter and essayist Jeff Gordinier argues that it’s time for the slackers to rise up and take charge. Taking off from his controversial Details essay “Has Generation X Already Peaked?� Gordinier takes the reader along on an enthralling, eye-opening journey—from the expatriate garrets of Prague to the amped-up offices of dot-com San Francisco, from the muddy fields of Woodstock �94 to the celebrity-obsessed media machine of Us Weekly—in his quest to find the essence of X. Along the way he shows how Gen X innovations in art, comedy, technology, activism, and (gasp!) business have come to define the way we live now. A proud, accomplished, and unrepentant X-er, Jeff Gordinier writes with insight and biting wit about the generation that time forgot—and makes a convincing case for Gen X as maybe, secretly, the “greatest generation� of all. Like Sex, Drugs, and Cocoa Puffs and The Tipping Point, X Saves the World flips conventional wisdom on its head and expertly captures the spirit of a strange and crucial era in American society.]]> 224 Jeff Gordinier 0670018589 Patrick 3 2008 3.47 2008 X Saves the World: How Generation X Got the Shaft but Can Still Keep Everything from Sucking
author: Jeff Gordinier
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.47
book published: 2008
rating: 3
read at:
date added: 2008/07/25
shelves: 2008
review:
I will pretty much listen to anyone who references the Replacements or Douglas Coupland. The focus of this giant essay is that X is still cool and vital. Being sandwiched in between the lame, culture-hogging and past-their-prime boomer generation, and the vapid, techno-dependent, Amererican-Idolizing "millennials," it's hard not to agree with him. One of his main points is illustrated by the notion that our generation was raised on multiple viewings of "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory," which ingrained in our little minds the idea that selling out=bad. All those other shits got their comeuppance, but Charlie kept his motherfucking street cred. Actually, I always hated that movie, but I like his point. The book got kind of goofy in the last third, talking about some eccentric philanthropists, like some guy who is trying to teach everyone to turn their front lawns into crops. The only problem is that Gordinier's definition of the generation seems to only include whites who like rock music. (There were a few pages devoted to Lauryn Hill, who was knocked out of popularity by the onset of the teen-pop explosion of '99.)
]]> <![CDATA[I Am America (And So Can You!)]]> 611298 Congratulations--just by opening the cover of this book you became 25% more patriotic.

From Stephen Colbert, the host of television's highest-rated punditry show The Colbert Report, comes the book to fill the other 23½ hours of your day. I Am America (And So Can You!) contains all of the opinions that Stephen doesn't have time to shoehorn into his nightly broadcast.

Dictated directly into a microcassette recorder over a three-day weekend, this book contains Stephen's most deeply held knee-jerk beliefs on The American Family, Race, Religion, Sex, Sports, and many more topics, conveniently arranged in chapter form.

Always controversial and outspoken, Stephen addresses why Hollywood is destroying America by inches, why evolution is a fraud, and why the elderly should be harnessed to millstones.

You may not agree with everything Stephen says, but at the very least, you'll understand that your differing opinion is wrong.

I Am America (And So Can You!) showcases Stephen Colbert at his most eloquent and impassioned. He is an unrelenting fighter for the soul of America, and in this book he fights the good fight for the traditional values that have served this country so well for so long.

Please buy this book before you leave the store.

About the Author
Stephen Colbert is America.

Description from book jacket]]> 230 Stephen Colbert 0446580503 Patrick 2 2008 3.90 2007 I Am America (And So Can You!)
author: Stephen Colbert
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.90
book published: 2007
rating: 2
read at:
date added: 2008/07/25
shelves: 2008
review:
I like Stephen Colbert the comedian, but Stephen Colbert the character is kind of a one-trick-pony. The book is funny at times but definitely repetitive. The highlights for me were his continued indictment of Kirstin Dunst as a powerful Hollywood liberal, and his predictions for the next twenty NFL championships.
]]> Cherise the Niece 2551330 Edward Gorey meets The Bunny Suicides in a murderously funny tale from the creator of It’s Happy Bunny

From the creator of the hugely successful It’s Happy Bunny franchise comes a little piece of work named Cherise, who may be, it turns out, a not-so-nice niece. In the tradition of Edward Gorey’s The Gashlycrumb Tinies, Jim Benton’s first adult picture book, with hilarious rhymes and illustrations, is a darkly comic masterpiece of the macabre.

“She was orphaned quite young In a mysterious way, Her parents just up and vanished one day.�

The bloody footprints leading out of Cherise’s bedroom are the first clue that perhaps the little darling with the bow in her hair is not an angel. As Cherise is shuttled from one aunt’s home to another, her aunts vanish, meeting inventive and hysterical ends. With a killer punch line on its final page, Jim Benton’s Cherise the Niece will leave readers laughing.]]> 48 Jim Benton 0452289483 Patrick 3 2008 3.82 2008 Cherise the Niece
author: Jim Benton
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.82
book published: 2008
rating: 3
read at:
date added: 2008/07/25
shelves: 2008
review:
Pretty good Edward Gorey ripoff, violent and funny pseudo-children's book.
]]> <![CDATA[Loose Girl: A Memoir of Promiscuity]]> 2249920 For everyone who knew that girl.
For everyone who wondered who that girl was. Kerry Cohen is eleven years old when she recognizes the power of her body in the leer of a grown man. Her parents are recently divorced and it doesn't take long before their lassitude and Kerry's desire to stand out--to be memorable in some way--combine to lead her down a path she knows she shouldn't take. Kerry wanted attention. She wanted love. But not really understanding what love was, not really knowing how to get it, she reached for sex instead. Loose Girl is Kerry Cohen's captivating memoir about her descent into promiscuity and how she gradually found her way toward real intimacy. The story of addiction--not just to sex, but to male attention-- Loose Girl is also the story of a young girl who came to believe that boys and men could give her life meaning. It didn't matter who he was. It was their movement that mattered, their being together. And for a while, that was enough. From the early rush of exploration to the day she learned to quiet the desperation and allow herself to love and be loved, Kerry's story is never less than riveting. In rich and immediate detail, Loose Girl re-creates what it feels like to be in that desperate moment, when a girl tries to control a boy by handing over her body, when the touch of that boy seems to offer proof of something, but ultimately delivers little more than emptiness. Kerry Cohen's journey from that hopeless place to her current confident and fulfilled existence is a cautionary tale and a revelation for girls young and old. The unforgettable memoir of one young woman who desperately wanted to matter, Loose Girl will speak to countless others with its compassion, understanding, and love.]]> 210 Kerry Cohen 1401303498 Patrick 3 2008
The highlight for me was when she went to the doctor upon discovering she had crabs, and gets diagnosed with HPV as a bonus, then the gynecologist berates her for coming to the clinic with semen still backed up in her vag ("But I took a shower..."). Total social blunder.

P.S. Yes, the reason for the spoiler alert tag was because of the HPV plot twist, if you've read this, the book is now ruined for you. It was totally a "Crying Game"/"Sixth Sense" moment.]]> 3.70 2008 Loose Girl: A Memoir of Promiscuity
author: Kerry Cohen
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.70
book published: 2008
rating: 3
read at:
date added: 2008/07/21
shelves: 2008
review:
Repetitive, but too brief (200p) to really get old, Cohen describes years of trying to find true love from anything with a boner in reach. I was hoping it would end with an epiphany where she realizes she just really likes to party, but alas, her bed-hopping left her pretty down in the dumps most of the time.

The highlight for me was when she went to the doctor upon discovering she had crabs, and gets diagnosed with HPV as a bonus, then the gynecologist berates her for coming to the clinic with semen still backed up in her vag ("But I took a shower..."). Total social blunder.

P.S. Yes, the reason for the spoiler alert tag was because of the HPV plot twist, if you've read this, the book is now ruined for you. It was totally a "Crying Game"/"Sixth Sense" moment.
]]> A Stir of Echoes 33553 This eerie ghost story, from Richard Matheson, the award-winning author of Hell House and I Am Legend, inspired the acclaimed 1999 film starring Kevin Bacon.

Tom Wallace lived an ordinary life, until a chance event awakened psychic abilities he never knew he possessed. Now he's hearing the private thoughts of the people around him-and learning shocking secrets he never wanted to know. But as Tom's existence becomes a waking nightmare, even greater jolts are in store as he becomes the unwilling recipient of a compelling message from beyond the grave!]]> 224 Richard Matheson 0765308711 Patrick 2 2008 3.88 1958 A Stir of Echoes
author: Richard Matheson
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.88
book published: 1958
rating: 2
read at:
date added: 2008/07/21
shelves: 2008
review:
This is his only book so far that wasn't really good, maybe it was because I'd already seen the movie with Kevin Bacon? Cool premise, a guy who goes under hypnosis at a party has latent mental powers unlocked, including clairvoyance, mind-reading, and psychometry, and then starts seeing a ghost in his living room and obviously has to solve a mystery. For some reason it just wasn't very engrossing, it didn't feel like there was anything at stake.
]]> <![CDATA[Let Me Stand Alone: The Journals of Rachel Corrie]]> 1347813 336 Rachel Corrie 0393065715 Patrick 2 2008 4.17 Let Me Stand Alone: The Journals of Rachel Corrie
author: Rachel Corrie
name: Patrick
average rating: 4.17
book published:
rating: 2
read at: 2008/07/17
date added: 2008/07/18
shelves: 2008
review:
For those who don't know her story, Corrie was a college student from Olympia, Washington who joined a group called the International Solidarity Movement and worked with other volunteers as human shields in Palestine, protecting civilian homes and water wells. Then she got ran over twice by a bulldozer driven by the Israeli military. This story was minimally reported in the U.S. media; instead they were focusing on the so-called dual-sided coin of Lyndie England (the poster girl for jovial torture practices on "enemy combatants" who haven't been convicted of anything) and Jessica Lynch (the "heroic" private who actually didn't do shit, her vehicle got shot up and some other guy actually saved her and she took the credit and allowed herself to be paraded around as some sort of symbol of the glorious triumph of the American spirit, or some such crap. Iraqi hospital workers tried to release her to the U.S. at a checkpoint, but they kept getting shot at by the army.) Anyway, of those three, Corrie is the only one I would have as a myspace friend. Unfortunately, the book, which is a collection of various writings found and put together by her family, seems more like an attempt by them at closure. It's not very good or interesting, a lot of stuff is obviously unfinished, there's a lot of bad adolescent poetry, and it doesn't deal with her time in Palestine until near the end, which is mainly some academic newsletters she had published. I would be kind of pissed if my family put all that out after I had died and couldn't edit it. Michael Moore dedicated "Dude, Where's My Country?" to her, writing, "Will I ever have her courage? Will I let her death be in vain?"
]]> <![CDATA[The Chris Farley Show: A Biography in Three Acts]]> 2349501 A biography of the Saturday Night Live star as told by his friends and family

No one dominated a stage the way Chris Farley did. For him, comedy was not a routine; it was a way of life. He could not enter a room unnoticed or let a conversation go without making someone laugh. Fans knew Chris as Saturday Night Live’s sweaty, swaggering, motivational speaker; as the irresistible Chippendales stripper; and as Tommy Callahan, the underdog hero of Tommy Boy. His family knew him as sensitive and passionate, deeply religious, and devoted to bringing laughter into others� lives.

But Chris did not know moderation, either in his boundless generosity toward friends or in the reckless abandon of his drug and alcohol abuse. For ten years, Chris cycled in and out of rehabilitation centers, constantly fighting his insecurities and his fears. Despite three hard-fought years of sobriety, addiction would ultimately take his life at the tragically young age of thirty-three. Fame on SNL and three straight number-one box office hits gave way to a string of embarrassing public appearances, followed by a fatal overdose in December 1997.

Here is Chris Farley as remembered by his family, friends, and colleagues—the true story of a man who lived to make us laugh and died as a result. The Chris Farley Show is an evocative and harrowing portrait of a family trapped by addiction, a father forced to bury a son, and a gifted and kindhearted man ultimately torn apart by the demons inside him.]]> 348 Tom Farley Jr. 0670019232 Patrick 3 2008 4.28 2007 The Chris Farley Show: A Biography in Three Acts
author: Tom Farley Jr.
name: Patrick
average rating: 4.28
book published: 2007
rating: 3
read at: 2008/07/17
date added: 2008/07/18
shelves: 2008
review:
I like oral histories, where you hear a story from a wide variety of sources through direct quotes and only minimal clarification/set-up in between. The contributors are Farley's friends and family, priests, girlfriends, cast members from Second City and Saturday Night Live, film directors, etc. It was definitely well-done, but I was hoping for a heavier emphasis on funny anecdotes from the SNL days, but a lot of it focused on his addictions, which I guess were a big part of his life and probably the entire point of the book. Don't do drugs!
]]> X-Men: The Return 653668 320 Chris Roberson 1416510753 Patrick 4 2008 3.54 X-Men: The Return
author: Chris Roberson
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.54
book published:
rating: 4
read at:
date added: 2008/07/18
shelves: 2008
review:
I bought this on a whim, I've never read a non-graphic text-only superhero novel before and wanted to really broaden my horizons. The author is well-versed in the lore created by Chris Claremont and wisely sets his book in the mid-80's era. The sweet cast begins with Cyclops, Wolverine, and Kitty Pryde, who are soon joined by Nightcrawler, Colossus, Rogue, Beast (pre-blue fur), Psylocke (pre-ninja body transfer), and Doug Ramsey (pre-death). (Storm was powerless at this time and I think Professor X was in outer space.) Cameos were made by other allies such as Alpha Flight, the New Mutants, the Hellions, etc. which I thought was cool, sticking in stuff just for the real nerds. The plot itself involves a group of ancient aliens returning to the Earth that they had populated(?) with humans years ago, sending their "Exemplars" (who of course, have mutant-like powers) to reclaim the planet. Our heroes split into three groups to attempt a series of missions to thwart these dastardly bastards. The point-of-view switches around to most of the characters, which I also thought was cool. All-in-all, I give it four stars and that is my book report on "X-Men: The Return." Can I go to recess now?
]]> Snuff 1840511 From the master of literary mayhem and provocation, a full-frontal Triple X novel that goes where no American work of fiction has gone before

Cassie Wright, porn priestess, intends to cap her legendary career by breaking the world record for serial fornication. On camera. With six hundred men. Snuff unfolds from the perspectives of Mr. 72, Mr. 137, and Mr. 600, who await their turn on camera in a very crowded green room. This wild, lethally funny, and thoroughly researched novel brings the huge yet underacknowledged presence of pornography in contemporary life into the realm of literary fiction at last. Who else but Chuck Palahniuk would dare do such a thing? Who else could do it so well, so unflinchingly, and with such an incendiary (you might say) climax?]]> 208 Chuck Palahniuk 0385517882 Patrick 4 2008 3.23 2008 Snuff
author: Chuck Palahniuk
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.23
book published: 2008
rating: 4
read at: 2008/07/17
date added: 2008/07/18
shelves: 2008
review:
Not his best (weak ending), but still way better than anyone else. Three pud-pullers and a producer on the world's biggest gang-bang take turns narrating the day's events. One thing I did notice is that a friend complained that he thinks Palahniuk writes in a library, so that if he ever can't think of anything to say, he can just start copying factoids out of a random book. The thing is, yeah, he does that a lot, but they are always consistent to the various themes in his books, so they're always adding to, not taking away from. Let's just hope the "Choke" movie doesn't... choke.
]]> The Girl Next Door 179735 370 Jack Ketchum 0843955430 Patrick 5 2008 3.90 1989 The Girl Next Door
author: Jack Ketchum
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.90
book published: 1989
rating: 5
read at: 2008/07/17
date added: 2008/07/18
shelves: 2008
review:
Finally something that lives up to the hype! This book has a reputation as being one of the most disturbing things ever and did not disappoint. Ketchum begins by expertly crafting the idyllic world of 1950's suburbia as seen through the eyes of the white, preteen boy. All of the horrific scenes throughout the book only have their impact because of how authentic of a world he creates initially, the way young boys think, talk, and act. The story is about two sisters who lose their parents in a car accident, come to stay with their aunt and her three sons, and the boys' friend and next-door-neighbor, who witnesses the abuse of the older girl throughout the summer. There was one incident where the foreshadowing caused me to have to put the book down for a few minutes, because I knew something really bad was going to happen, and this was after a chore-list of reprehensible acts (I watch a lot of horror movies and thought I had pretty much seen it all). I was describing the book to someone, and her response was something about how the author must be insane and in need of psychiatric help to come up with something so vile, so I did a little research and found the book to have been based on a true crime (see: Sylvia Likens), and Ketchum's reason for writing it was because the story made him angry and he wanted to give the victim a heroic voice. It's hard for some people to accept that someone like Stephen King is just a small-town family man, not a satanic baby-eater. Too bad they can't see the merit in something that makes them uneasy or upset, and think anyone who does find artistic value in a book like this must be a sadist or a pervert (which actually is the case for me). They also dismiss certain movies they haven't actually watched as "torture porn," failing to understand the political satire in "Hostel" or the captivating mystery of the first "Saw." (Diablo Cody called for an end to "penguin porn" at the movies in a recent Entertainment Weekly column, and I think that's a much bigger problem facing America.) Anyways, The Girl Next Door will blow your mind if you let it.
]]> Hellblazer: Son of Man 585701 128 Garth Ennis 1401202020 Patrick 4 2008 3.98 2003 Hellblazer: Son of Man
author: Garth Ennis
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.98
book published: 2003
rating: 4
read at:
date added: 2008/07/18
shelves: 2008
review:
20 years after the fact, Constantine is forced to deal with a mob boss's child who he "resurrected."
]]> Hellblazer: Setting Sun 43723 96 Warren Ellis 1401202454 Patrick 2 2008 4.20 2004 Hellblazer: Setting Sun
author: Warren Ellis
name: Patrick
average rating: 4.20
book published: 2004
rating: 2
read at:
date added: 2008/07/18
shelves: 2008
review:
Hit or miss collection of one-issue stories.
]]> <![CDATA[Preacher, Volume 2: Until the End of the World]]> 95406
In this continuing saga of the bizarre life of a faithless Texas preacher, Jesse Custer heads to the south to confront the extremely dysfunctional family that abused him as a child and planted the original seeds of his disillusionment with the world. Now merged with a half angelic, half demonic being, the former preacher looks to exact revenge against those who simultaneously raised and destroyed him. Then after exorcising his personal demons, Jesse, his girlfriend Tulip, and their friend Cassidy, the Irish vampire, head west to a party of Babylonian proportions.

Collects: Preacher #8�17]]> 258 Garth Ennis 1563893126 Patrick 4 2008 4.28 1997 Preacher, Volume 2: Until the End of the World
author: Garth Ennis
name: Patrick
average rating: 4.28
book published: 1997
rating: 4
read at:
date added: 2008/05/04
shelves: 2008
review:
I forgot that this guy has the power to make anyone do whatever he says, that's a good power. Custer is also a lot like John Constantine from "Hellblazer" in that he's not just an anti-hero, he's kind of an asshole in general, which is really a breath of fresh air. The first half of this collection deals with his hellish childhood with a nightmare of a family and was pretty amazing, the second part was average. "Preacher" would probably make an awesome movie, but I don't think "Constantine" went over that well, so we'll see.
]]> <![CDATA[Born Standing Up: A Comic's Life]]> 773858
Emmy and Grammy Award winner, author of the acclaimed New York Times bestsellers Shopgirl and The Pleasure of My Company, and a regular contributor to The New Yorker, Martin has always been a writer. His memoir of his years in stand-up is candid, spectacularly amusing, and beautifully written.

At age ten Martin started his career at Disneyland, selling guidebooks in the newly opened theme park. In the decade that followed, he worked in the Disney magic shop and the Bird Cage Theatre at Knott's Berry Farm, performing his first magic/comedy act a dozen times a week. The story of these years, during which he practiced and honed his craft, is moving and revelatory. The dedication to excellence and innovation is formed at an astonishingly early age and never wavers or wanes.

Martin illuminates the sacrifice, discipline, and originality that made him an icon and informs his work to this day. To be this good, to perform so frequently, was isolating and lonely. It took Martin decades to reconnect with his parents and sister, and he tells that story with great tenderness. Martin also paints a portrait of his times-the era of free love and protests against the war in Vietnam, the heady irreverence of The Smothers Brothers Comedy Hour in the late sixties, and the transformative new voice of Saturday Night Live in the seventies.

Throughout the text, Martin has placed photographs, many never seen before. Born Standing Up is a superb testament to the sheer tenacity, focus, and daring of one of the greatest and most iconoclastic comedians of all time.]]> 207 Steve Martin 1416553649 Patrick 3 2008
"What if there were no punch lines? What if there were no indicators? What if I created tension and never released it? What if I headed for a climax, but all I delivered was an anticlimax? ...if I kept denying them the formality of a punch line, the audience would eventually pick their own place to laugh, essentially out of desperation... Never let them know I was bombing. 'This is funny, you just haven't gotten it yet.' It was essential that I never show doubt about what I was doing. I would move through my act without pausing for the laugh, as though everything were an aside. Eventually, I thought, the laughs would be playing catch-up to what I was doing. Everything would be either delivered in passing, or the opposite, an elaborate presentation that climaxed in pointlessness. Another rule was to make the audience believe that I thought I was fantastic, that my confience could not be shattered. They had to believe that I didn't care if they laughed at all, and that this act was going on with or without them."]]> 3.87 2007 Born Standing Up: A Comic's Life
author: Steve Martin
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.87
book published: 2007
rating: 3
read at: 2008/05/04
date added: 2008/05/04
shelves: 2008
review:
I'm not the biggest Steve Martin fan, but I watched "Dead Men Don't Wear Plaid" a few months ago and my brother gave me his book "Cruel Shoes" in college, so I was interested to read his take on his stand-up years, which were a kind of anti-comedy that employed the banjo and purposely bad magic tricks. The book is only 200 pages, so it's concise and interesting thoughout. My favorite part was when he explained his theory of what he was trying to do:

"What if there were no punch lines? What if there were no indicators? What if I created tension and never released it? What if I headed for a climax, but all I delivered was an anticlimax? ...if I kept denying them the formality of a punch line, the audience would eventually pick their own place to laugh, essentially out of desperation... Never let them know I was bombing. 'This is funny, you just haven't gotten it yet.' It was essential that I never show doubt about what I was doing. I would move through my act without pausing for the laugh, as though everything were an aside. Eventually, I thought, the laughs would be playing catch-up to what I was doing. Everything would be either delivered in passing, or the opposite, an elaborate presentation that climaxed in pointlessness. Another rule was to make the audience believe that I thought I was fantastic, that my confience could not be shattered. They had to believe that I didn't care if they laughed at all, and that this act was going on with or without them."
]]> <![CDATA[You Must Be This Happy to Enter: Stories (Punk Planet Books)]]> 890268
Elizabeth Crane is the author of two previous story collections, When the Messenger is Hot and All This Heavenly Glory . Her work has also been featured in numerous publications, including Chicago Reader and The Believer , as well as several anthologies, including McSweeney’s Future Dictionary of America and The Best Underground Fiction . A winner of the Chicago Public Library’s 21st Century Award, Crane teaches creative writing at Northwestern’s School of Continuing Studies, The School of the Art Institute, and The University of Chicago. She lives in Chicago.]]> 183 Elizabeth Crane 1933354437 Patrick 2 2008 3.77 2008 You Must Be This Happy to Enter: Stories (Punk Planet Books)
author: Elizabeth Crane
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.77
book published: 2008
rating: 2
read at: 2008/04/27
date added: 2008/04/27
shelves: 2008
review:
I think they front-loaded this Chicago native's collection with the really good stories, the rest are all kind of average. "My Life is Awesome! And Great!" only uses exclamation points and question marks to end sentences, another is about a woman from my hometown of Lombard, Il who is turned into a zombie after getting bit at JoAnn Fabrics and then stars on the reality show "Starting Over." That story also mentions the Container Store. Another good piece is just notes for writing a story about people with weird phobias who go on a Springer-like show, and two of the fears are Aldi's and the Dollar Store, going back to the theme of stores I think are hilarious just for existing. So I guess you could describe her style as humorous with a bizarre twist on ultra-modern reality at times, but a lot of the stories come off as someone just getting an idea they think is kind of funny (What if someone had a baby, and the very next day it turned into Ethan Hawke?) and trying to write an entire 15 pages around it with a completely abrubt ending. I stopped reading one story a page in that was just a list of nice things she wants to do/not do when she has a baby? Also, I complained of an occasionally "bloggy" writing style to a friend who was flipping through it, and he said, "Well it would have to be with titles like 'What Our Week Was Like.'" Another problem was she seems to be suffering from "I'm going to make fun of hipsters even though I am one myself" syndrome that we all have come down with these days. After all that though, I definitely half to give her props for experimenting and being original, albeit with mixed results, IMHO.
]]> The Boy Detective Fails 102504 Lost within this unwelcoming place, Billy finds the companionship of two lonely children, Effie and Gus Mumford - one a science fair genius, the other a charming, silent bully. With a nearly forgotten bravery, Billy confronts the monotony of his job in telephone sales, the awkward beauty of a desperate pickpocket named Penny Maple, and the seemingly impossible solution to the mystery of his sister's death. Along the path laden with hidden clues and codes that dare to be deciphered, the boy detective may learn the greatest secret of all: the necessity of the unknown.

]]> 328 Joe Meno 1933354100 Patrick 5 2008 3.90 2006 The Boy Detective Fails
author: Joe Meno
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.90
book published: 2006
rating: 5
read at: 2008/04/22
date added: 2008/04/22
shelves: 2008
review:
Wow, this was great. It is kind of like a darker companion to "Confessions of a Teen Sleuth" by Chelsea Cain, which was a humorous account of Nancy Drew's life story, as told by her. This one is a thirty-year-old Encyclopedia Brown type named Billy Argo, just released from a decade stint in a psychiatric hospital following a breakdown after his younger sister's suicide. The tone is melancholy and surreal, almost like the comic and violent Edward Gorey, and uses subtly outdated 1950's-era language which was funny and added to the idea of this being a continuation of the hero's earlier adventures (the book starts at chapter 33 or something). The heavily medicated Boy Detective, back in reality and unsure of himself, runs into old friends and enemies, including his arch-rival, the nefarious Professor Von Golum (who lives in Billy's group home and he keeps seeing on the bus. Awkward.), whose plans to kill Billy keep going unfulfilled due to his senility and grandpa-like tendency to fall asleep. Billy also tries to break up an all-star villains of crime convention that is straight out of "The Tick." Eventually, he develops a crush on a pick-pocket who only steals pink things, befriends some unpopular children, and half-heartedly tries to solve the mystery of his own past, present, and future, and it's all really just funny and sad and hopeful at the same time. Highly recommended.
]]> Zeroville 921569
]]> 329 Steve Erickson 1933372397 Patrick 2 2008 4.10 2007 Zeroville
author: Steve Erickson
name: Patrick
average rating: 4.10
book published: 2007
rating: 2
read at: 2008/04/22
date added: 2008/04/21
shelves: 2008
review:
This is a meta-fiction mini-epic spanning from 1969-1982 in Hollywood. The main character is an anti-social film editor with a tattoo of Montgomery Clift and Liz Taylor from the movie "A Place in the Sun," of which he is obsessed, along with the idea that God kills his children. I didn't care for the book as a whole, but I enjoyed the author's technique of alluding to most of the notable movies and actors of this era without using their specific names, instead he would give summaries from the slightly warped perspective of the main character, and it became a game within the book to figure out what film he'd just seen. My favorite parts where when he immerses himself in the New York punk scene of the late 70's, and when a young female friend makes fun of him for liking "Rio Bravo."
]]> <![CDATA[Devil's Knot: The True Story of the West Memphis Three (Justice Knot, #1)]]> 206899 The Devil's Knot remains the most comprehensive, insightful reporting ever done on the investigation, trials, and convictions of three teenage boys who became known as the West Memphis Three.

For weeks in 1993, after the murders of three eight-year-old boys, police in West Memphis, Arkansas seemed stymied. Then suddenly, detectives charged three teenagers--alleged members of a satanic cult--with the killings. Despite the witch-hunt atmosphere of the trials and a case that included stunning investigative blunders, a confession riddled with errors, and an absence of physical evidence linking any of the accused to the crime, the teenagers were convicted. Jurors sentenced Jason Baldwin and Jessie Misskelley to life in prison and Damien Echols, the accused ringleader, to death. The guilty verdicts were popular in their home state--even upheld on appeal--and all three remained in prison until their unprecedented release in August 2011.

With close-up views of its key participants, this award-winning account unravels the many tangled knots of this endlessly shocking case, one that will shape the American legal landscape for years to come.]]> 419 Mara Leveritt 0743417607 Patrick 5 2008 4.17 2002 Devil's Knot: The True Story of the West Memphis Three (Justice Knot, #1)
author: Mara Leveritt
name: Patrick
average rating: 4.17
book published: 2002
rating: 5
read at:
date added: 2008/04/14
shelves: 2008
review:
Remind me not to wear a black t-shirt next time I'm in Arkansas. For those who have seen the two "Paradise Lost: The Child Murders at Robin Hood Hills" documentaries, you should know that the films barely scratched the tip of the iceberg. For those unfamiliar with the case, in 1993 in the town of West Memphis, three 8-year-old boys were found murdered in a ditch near a truck stop. The unbelievable investigative and judicial shit-show that followed resulted in three teenagers being convicted, with no physical evidence whatsoever, other than the fact that they were into Metallica and one of the kids checked a book on Wicca out of the library. The cops decided the motive for the killing was that the teens were in a satanic cult and the murders were a a ritual killing, even though there was no sign of occult activity at the scene. The book piles on maddening details of the "amateur justice metted out" (according to Henry Rollins's blurb on the back cover), such as the initial coerced--then recanted--confession by one of the convicts (a kid with a borderline mentally retarded IQ) whose 12-hour interrogation (only 45 minutes of which was recorded) was filled with inaccuracies, the constant blockings by the biased trial judge of anything the defense did to help their clients, leaks to the media, numerous second-hand witnesses who all admitted to lying after the fact, the prosecutors calling to the stand an "occult expert" who was then revealed by the defense to have gotten his PHD through the mail, random sticks and knives brought in to the jury as "evidence" that had no fingerprints, dna, blood, etc., numerous other suspects not followed up on by the police (many of whom were under investigation themselves for corruption prior to the case), and so on and so forth.
]]> The Half Life of Stars 99578 306 Louise Wener 0060841737 Patrick 2 2008 3.45 2006 The Half Life of Stars
author: Louise Wener
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.45
book published: 2006
rating: 2
read at: 2008/03/27
date added: 2008/04/11
shelves: 2008
review:
This was really disappointing, I really liked Wener's previous novel, "Goodnight Steve McQueen," and her band, Sleeper. This story is about a girl in London who sets off to find her older brother, who has disappeared, abandoning his wife and family. The main problem with the book is that it's really boring, the ending was too cute and neatly packaged, and it was so dialogue-heavy that I lost track of which character was talking because they weren't very interesting. There were like three plot twists in the last 50 pages I didn't see coming because I didn't expect any at all, so I guess that was exciting. The only really strong point was the funny couple the main characer stays with in Miami, an angry, balding ex-actor and his girlfriend, whose main dilemma in life is deciding whether or not to get breast implants, and also enjoys making margaritas with crushed up valium mixed in with the salt on the rim of the glasses.
]]> <![CDATA[Rodrick Rules (Diary of a Wimpy Kid, #2)]]> 1809465 NEW YORK TIMES bestselling book!

Secrets have a way of getting out, especially when a diary is involved.

Whatever you do, don’t ask Greg Heffley how he spent his summer vacation, because he definitely doesn’t want to talk about it.

As Greg enters the new school year, he’s eager to put the past three months behind him . . . and one event in particular.

Unfortunately for Greg, his older brother, Rodrick, knows all about the incident Greg wants to keep under wraps. But secrets have a way of getting out . . . especially when a diary is involved.

Diary of a Wimpy Kid: Rodrick Rules chronicles Greg’s attempts to navigate the hazards of middle school, impress the girls, steer clear of the school talent show, and most important, keep his secret safe.]]> 226 Jeff Kinney 0810994739 Patrick 5 2008 4.16 2008 Rodrick Rules (Diary of a Wimpy Kid, #2)
author: Jeff Kinney
name: Patrick
average rating: 4.16
book published: 2008
rating: 5
read at:
date added: 2008/04/09
shelves: 2008
review:
I think Rowley is my favorite character from these books, he is like a Ralph Wiggum for the new millenium. I want a "Zoo-Wee Mama!" shirt.
]]> <![CDATA[Diary of a Wimpy Kid (Diary of a Wimpy Kid, #1)]]> 389627 In the first book of the Diary of a Wimpy Kid series, #1 international bestselling author Jeff Kinney, introduces us to Greg Heffley: an unforgettable, unlikely hero that every family can relate to.

Being a kid can really stink. And no one knows this better than Greg. He finds himself thrust into middle school, where undersized weaklings share the hallways with kids who are taller, meaner, and already shaving. Greg is happy to have Rowley Jefferson, his sidekick, along for the ride. But when Rowley's star starts to rise, Greg tries to use his best friend's newfound popularity to his own advantage, kicking off a chain of events that will test their friendship in hilarious fashion.

The hazards of growing up before you're ready are uniquely revealed through words and drawings as Greg records them in his diary. But as Greg says: “Just don’t expect me to be all “Dear Diary� this and “Dear Diary� that.�

Luckily for us, what Greg Heffley says he won’t do and what he actually does are two very different things.]]> 226 Jeff Kinney 0810993139 Patrick 5 2008 3.98 2007 Diary of a Wimpy Kid (Diary of a Wimpy Kid, #1)
author: Jeff Kinney
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.98
book published: 2007
rating: 5
read at:
date added: 2008/04/03
shelves: 2008
review:
This was really funny, I don't know if it's supposed to be a kids' book or just meant to look like one. A fake journal of an awkward boy's first year of middle-school and his trials and tribulations, hand-written and complete with drawings. The voice is kind of like a less-savvy Nick Twisp from C.D. Payne's "Youth in Revolt." An example of a typical mini-storyline: the kid talks about how the only basketball hoop in his school's playground with a net has had a rotten piece of cheese underneath it for months, so no one uses the hoop. Once, someone touched it and tagged someone else with "the cheese touch," then he touched another kid, and so on. Eventually, the last kid who had it moved, and the narrator hopes no one ever touches the cheese again because he "doesn't need that kind of stress" in his life again. The cartoons are reminiscent of Scott Adams of "Dilbert" fame, in that they are simple, almost crude, yet the facial expressions and other subtleties are hysterical.
]]> The Ruins 21726 336 Scott Smith 1400043875 Patrick 5 2008 3.67 2006 The Ruins
author: Scott Smith
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.67
book published: 2006
rating: 5
read at:
date added: 2008/04/03
shelves: 2008
review:
This book was evil and unrelenting in a Richard Bachman-esque fashion. It seemed like the type of book Eli Roth, director of "Cabin Fever" and "Hostel" would write. The tone reminded me of the movies "Open Water (married couple left behind in the shark-infested ocean after a snorkeling expedition)" and "The Descent (adventurous women trapped in a cave full of flesh-eating creatures)," in that the characters are put immediately--and for the duration of the story--into a horrible, unescapable situation going from bad to worse that you are forced to picture yourself in, thinking, "I'm sure glad I'm not one of these poor saps." The nature of the characters' antagonism can't be given without ruining it, but it begins with a group of young vacationers in Cancun searching for a missing sibling at a rumored Mayan archaeological dig site. The horror unfolds in a page-turning steady fashion, each new revelation building on the previous nastiness. The narration switches between four different characters, which was neat. The movie will probably be really tame and blow a goat.
]]> <![CDATA[Heartsick (Archie Sheridan & Gretchen Lowell, #1)]]> 657034
Damaged Portland detective Archie Sheridan spent ten years tracking Gretchen Lowell, a beautiful serial killer, but in the end she was the one who caught him. Two years ago, Gretchen kidnapped Archie and tortured him for ten days, but instead of killing him, she mysteriously decided to let him go. She turned herself in, and now Gretchen has been locked away for the rest of her life, while Archie is in a prison of another kind---addicted to pain pills, unable to return to his old life, powerless to get those ten horrific days off his mind. Archie's a different person, his estranged wife says, and he knows she's right. He continues to visit Gretchen in prison once a week, saying that only he can get her to confess as to the whereabouts of more of her victims, but even he knows the truth---he can't stay away.

When another killer begins snatching teenage girls off the streets of Portland, Archie has to pull himself together enough to lead the new task force investigating the murders. A hungry young newspaper reporter, Susan Ward, begins profiling Archie and the investigation, which sparks a deadly game between Archie, Susan, the new killer, and even Gretchen. They need to catch a killer, and maybe somehow then Archie can free himself from Gretchen, once and for all. Either way, Heartsick makes for one of the most extraordinary suspense debuts in recent memory.
]]> 326 Chelsea Cain 0312368461 Patrick 3 2008 3.93 2007 Heartsick (Archie Sheridan & Gretchen Lowell, #1)
author: Chelsea Cain
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.93
book published: 2007
rating: 3
read at:
date added: 2008/03/25
shelves: 2008
review:
This is basically a gender-reversed rip-off of "Red Dragon." In the current story, several teenage girls have been murdered in Portland, and a psychologically damaged, prescription drug-addicted, semi-retired police detective is brought in to head up the task-force assigned to the case. The story flashes back several times several years prior, to where he was held captive and tortured for ten days by a female serial killer--Gretchen Lowell--who the same task force had been hunting. These captivating and serenely violent flashbacks were what kept me reading, because the current case was boring. Besides the detective, a second main character is added--a young, "hip," female reporter--and she is too bland to be called annoying. Luckily, when things are getting dull, the detective's wife is interviewed about Gretchen, and another scene where she is visited in prison (the detective continues to see her weekly, even though she has virtually destroyed his life) both come to save the day. I watch a lot of horror movies and am not easily disturbed, but there were a couple things she did to him that had me close to squirming (and it wasn't something obvious like castration). The reveal of the current killer and the ending itself were both lame.
]]> Iceman: My Fighting Life 2325230
What’s it like to have no fear, to make people cower in their shoes, to know the sweet satisfaction of knocking a guy out with a single, devastating punch? You have to read my book to find out. I’ve been called the baddest man on the planet. I’m the face of Ultimate Fighting Championship, the leader in mixed martial arts and the fastest growing sport in America. In 1998 I won my first MMA fight. Not long after, the UFC came calling, and eventually fought my way to become the #1 ranked light-heavyweight contender in the world. Not bad for a bartender with a college degree in accounting.

I was raised by a single mother and inspired by my grandfather, a first- generation Irish American from Mafia-run Brooklyn. I learned how to fight at a very young age. Now I’m 6'2", 220 pounds, and a trained lethal weapon, but I’m also fiercely loyal, maybe even a bit sensitive, and unexpectedly romantic. In raw detail, and with total honesty, I’m going to tell you the story of my fighting life—both inside and outside the Octagon� including my childhood in the poor section of Santa Barbara, gritty insider accounts of my major fights, stories behind my trademark mohawk and nickname, my ongoing rivalry with Tito Ortiz and deep-rooted friendship with Dana White, and how I balance life as a father, a UFC champ, and a superstar—or try to, anyway. With never-before-seen photos, Iceman is my true, no-holds-barred story of fighting my way to become a champion.]]> 305 Chuck Liddell 0525950567 Patrick 2 2008 3.52 2008 Iceman: My Fighting Life
author: Chuck Liddell
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.52
book published: 2008
rating: 2
read at: 2008/03/25
date added: 2008/03/25
shelves: 2008
review:
As a casual fan of UFC at best, I found this to be good, but not great. For those who don't know, Liddell has held the light heavyweight championship, and gained tremendous popularity for his style, which focuses on ending fights quickly by knockout, as opposed to going for a choke or submission. The many short chapters are all titled by words of advice or lessons he's learned. The highlights for me were the account of his long feud with Tito Ortiz and his series with Randy Couture.
]]> <![CDATA[The Autobiography of Malcolm X]]> 92057
Through a life of passion and struggle, Malcolm X became one of the most influential figures of the 20th Century. In this riveting account, he tells of his journey from a prison cell to Mecca, describing his transition from hoodlum to Muslim minister. Here, the man who called himself "the angriest Black man in America" relates how his conversion to true Islam helped him confront his rage and recognize the brotherhood of all mankind.

An established classic of modern America, "The Autobiography of Malcolm X" was hailed by the New York Times as "Extraordinary. A brilliant, painful, important book." Still extraordinary, still important, this electrifying story has transformed Malcolm X's life into his legacy. The strength of his words, and the power of his ideas continue to resonate more than a generation after they first appeared.]]> 466 Malcolm X Patrick 4 2008
"'Conservatism' in America's politics means 'Let's keep the niggers in their place.' And 'liberalism' means 'Let's keep the knee-grows in their place--but tell them we'll treat them a little better; let's fool them more, with more promises.' With these choices, I felt that the American black man only needed to choose which one to be eaten by, the 'liberal' fox or the 'conservative' wolf--because both of them would eat him."

"...next to me was a white man. 'Malcolm X!' he called out--and when I looked, he stuck his hand out of his car, across at me, grinning. 'Do you mind shaking hands with a white man?' Imagine that! Just as the traffic light turned green, I told him, 'I don't mind shaking hands with human beings. Are you one?'"

Anyways, I thought the first half of the book was amazing, then it got into his conversion to the Nation of Islam in jail and I just got annoyed learning about that religion and his devotion to it, because it's just as retarded, archaic, repressive, sexist, imperialistic, and altogether FAKE as Christianity, which he railed against. Ironically, the same group that saved his downward-spiraling life by giving him a purpose, ultimately stabbed him in the back, and then shot him in the front. There was some cool history when he talked about all the reading he did in jail, involving British rule in India and Gandhi, and something called the Chinese opium wars, which I never heard of before (he also copied an entire dictionary by hand because he was sick of not knowing what certain words meant). I guess like most who read this, I admired his honesty, rage, unfaltering determination, and ability to continue to evolve as a person without compromising his core ideals.

I re-watched the Spike Lee movie version, having originally seen it at 14, and it is not close to being a substitute for the book--he changes things, leaves things out, adds things, etc. Youtube has a lot of cool clips of various television appearances, however, which I feel is a better supplement. Also, vitamins are a good supplement.]]> 4.35 1965 The Autobiography of Malcolm X
author: Malcolm X
name: Patrick
average rating: 4.35
book published: 1965
rating: 4
read at:
date added: 2008/03/23
shelves: 2008
review:
I had a lot to say about this book but I forgot most of it, it's kind of like you have to read it yourself. I do have a couple quotes because they were at the end of the book so they were easy to find:

"'Conservatism' in America's politics means 'Let's keep the niggers in their place.' And 'liberalism' means 'Let's keep the knee-grows in their place--but tell them we'll treat them a little better; let's fool them more, with more promises.' With these choices, I felt that the American black man only needed to choose which one to be eaten by, the 'liberal' fox or the 'conservative' wolf--because both of them would eat him."

"...next to me was a white man. 'Malcolm X!' he called out--and when I looked, he stuck his hand out of his car, across at me, grinning. 'Do you mind shaking hands with a white man?' Imagine that! Just as the traffic light turned green, I told him, 'I don't mind shaking hands with human beings. Are you one?'"

Anyways, I thought the first half of the book was amazing, then it got into his conversion to the Nation of Islam in jail and I just got annoyed learning about that religion and his devotion to it, because it's just as retarded, archaic, repressive, sexist, imperialistic, and altogether FAKE as Christianity, which he railed against. Ironically, the same group that saved his downward-spiraling life by giving him a purpose, ultimately stabbed him in the back, and then shot him in the front. There was some cool history when he talked about all the reading he did in jail, involving British rule in India and Gandhi, and something called the Chinese opium wars, which I never heard of before (he also copied an entire dictionary by hand because he was sick of not knowing what certain words meant). I guess like most who read this, I admired his honesty, rage, unfaltering determination, and ability to continue to evolve as a person without compromising his core ideals.

I re-watched the Spike Lee movie version, having originally seen it at 14, and it is not close to being a substitute for the book--he changes things, leaves things out, adds things, etc. Youtube has a lot of cool clips of various television appearances, however, which I feel is a better supplement. Also, vitamins are a good supplement.
]]> <![CDATA[Myth-ion Improbable (Myth Adventures, #11)]]> 74297 198 Robert Lynn Asprin 044100962X Patrick 2 2008 3.81 2001 Myth-ion Improbable (Myth Adventures, #11)
author: Robert Lynn Asprin
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.81
book published: 2001
rating: 2
read at:
date added: 2008/03/14
shelves: 2008
review:
So somehow I just found out that the writer of this series I was really into in sixth grade started writing the books again, so I had to check it out. It revolved around a young magician's apprentice named Skeeve, and his mentor, a demon named Aahz, and their "myth-adventures." Back then, I had found a few of the books left on the shelves in the room I used to share with my brother, and was totally into the series, the genre of which I guess would be considered "fantasy-comedy," bordering on satire. Anyways, in the mid-nineties, Robert Asprin got in some trouble with the IRS, and didn't write anything for seven years, which I guess is why he dropped off my radar. Then he struck some deal where he had to give them a bunch of the profits off of any future works, and found a loophole that said he didn't owe as much if he co-wrote books, so that's mainly what he does now. He wrote this particular entry to get back in the swing of things and shake the rust off and it shows. It's a really bad book. The old characters are totally flat, Skeeve's narration is this lame, fish-out-of-water crap, Aahz's whole personality consists of him saying, "Skeeve, you're so stupid," and the other character, their beautiful, green, former-assassin ally, Tananda does absolutely nothing but give Skeeve the ocassional hug. The book is only 198 pages long, yet manages to be extremely repetitive. The entire first 50 pages consists of them asking some guy to help them find some dimension, then they go to it, realize it's the wrong one, then go back and ask the guy for a different one. Long story short, I give this two stars for nostalgia's sake, hoping for him and his readers that he did it as an excercise to get back in shape and the rest of the books turned out better. As bad as it was, I feel like I might eventually check out the other new ones too, because I'm a total idiot.
]]> <![CDATA[Persepolis. The story of a childhood (Persepolis, #1)]]> 9516
Persepolis paints an unforgettable portrait of daily life in Iran and of the bewildering contradictions between home life and public life. Marjane’s child’s-eye view of dethroned emperors, state-sanctioned whippings, and heroes of the revolution allows us to learn as she does the history of this fascinating country and of her own extraordinary family. Intensely personal, profoundly political, and wholly original, Persepolis is at once a story of growing up and a reminder of the human cost of war and political repression. It shows how we carry on, with laughter and tears, in the face of absurdity. And, finally, it introduces us to an irresistible little girl with whom we cannot help but fall in love.]]> 153 Marjane Satrapi 037571457X Patrick 3 2008 4.27 2003 Persepolis. The story of a childhood (Persepolis, #1)
author: Marjane Satrapi
name: Patrick
average rating: 4.27
book published: 2003
rating: 3
read at:
date added: 2008/03/10
shelves: 2008
review:
Autobiographical graphic novel telling of a rebelious young girl's childhood in post-islamic revolution Iran, circa early 1980's. The art is more "comic strip" than "comic book," but still executes the narrative and successfully conveys the characters' emotions with the minimalist style, if I can say that. I liked the juxtaposition of naive humor with sadness and startling violence, some of it was reminiscent of Los Hernandez Bros' "Love and Rockets." I liked that there weren't a lot of black and white characters, she would go back and forth exalting and condemning her parents, there was a fine line between her heroes and cowards. It looks like she's on her way to becoming a punk rocker when she moves to Germany in the second book, so I'm looking forward to reading that too.
]]> <![CDATA[All the Rage: The Boondocks Past and Present]]> 52840 All the Rage is a must for any true Boondocks fan.]]> 280 Aaron McGruder 0307352668 Patrick 4 2008 4.38 2007 All the Rage: The Boondocks Past and Present
author: Aaron McGruder
name: Patrick
average rating: 4.38
book published: 2007
rating: 4
read at:
date added: 2008/03/08
shelves: 2008
review:
The final year of strips collected, followed by various and sundry interviews, articles, tv appearance transcripts, etc. with Aaron McGruder, then a selection of "controversial" strips that were pulled from some newspapers, along with his commentary on them, and finally, a few "Fox Trot" strips reacting to his announcement of hiatus.
]]> The Road 6288
A father and his son walk alone through burned America. Nothing moves in the ravaged landscape save the ash on the wind. It is cold enough to crack stones, and when the snow falls it is gray. The sky is dark. Their destination is the coast, although they don’t know what, if anything, awaits them there. They have nothing; just a pistol to defend themselves against the lawless bands that stalk the road, the clothes they are wearing, a cart of scavenged food—and each other.

The Road is the profoundly moving story of a journey. It boldly imagines a future in which no hope remains, but in which the father and his son, “each the other’s world entire,� are sustained by love. Awesome in the totality of its vision, it is an unflinching meditation on the worst and the best that we are capable of: ultimate destructiveness, desperate tenacity, and the tenderness that keeps two people alive in the face of total devastation.]]> 241 Cormac McCarthy 0307265439 Patrick 5 2008 3.99 2006 The Road
author: Cormac McCarthy
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.99
book published: 2006
rating: 5
read at:
date added: 2008/03/07
shelves: 2008
review:
This was my first foray into the work of Cormac McCarthy (who wrote the book that became the movie "No Country for Old Men") and I was definitely impressed. The story involves a man and his young son traveling down the road in question, trying to survive starvation and worse in a post-apocalyptic nightmare of a world that is cold, dark, and filled with murderous caravans. The main themes of the book are what a parent will do for their child, what makes us "carry the fire" in the face of an impossibly bad situation, and what it means to be "the good guys." The style added to the nomadic feel of the book, there were no chapters, just paragraph breaks, and no quotation marks to differentiate between the characters' dialogue, mainly because the man and his son were usually the only ones speaking. I am an admitted cynic/pessimist/ironist, ready to dismiss most of what I come across as "cheesy," so it takes something really special for me to describe it as "moving," "touching," or "powerful," which are the words I would use to sum this up.
]]> <![CDATA[Why Do Men Fall Asleep After Sex? More Questions You'd Only Ask a Doctor After Your Third Whiskey Sour]]> 6611
Did the mega-bestselling Why Do Men Have Nipples? exhaust your curiosity about stuff odd, icky, kinky, noxious, libidinous, or just plain embarrassing? No, you say? Well, good, because the doctor and his able-bodied buddy are in! Again! Mark Leyner and Billy Goldberg, M.D., now take on the differences between the sexes—those burning questions like Why doesn’t my husband ever listen? or Why does my wife ALWAYS have to pee? And of course, Why do men fall asleep after sex?, plus plenty of others to keep you fully informed.

Full of smart and funny answers to an onslaught of new questions, all in a do-ask-we’ll-tell spirit that entertain and teaches you something at the same time, Why Do Men Fall Asleep After Sex? offers the real lowdown on everything everyone wants to know about all things anatomical, medical, sexual, nutritional, animal, and mineral, but would only ask a physician after a few too many, like:

� Why do you have a “bionic� sense of smell when you’re pregnant?

� Does peeing in the shower cure athlete’s foot?

� Is a dog’s mouth clean?

� Can you breastfeed with fake boobs?

� Does thumb sucking cause buckteeth?

� Do your eyebrows grow back if shaved?

Bigger, funnier, and better than ever, Why Do Men Fall Asleep After Sex? proves that in the battle of the sexes, as in most things, a little Q&A is a safe, effective, minimally invasive remedy.


Also available as an eBook]]> 263 Mark Leyner 0307345971 Patrick 3 2008 3.55 2006 Why Do Men Fall Asleep After Sex? More Questions You'd Only Ask a Doctor After Your Third Whiskey Sour
author: Mark Leyner
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.55
book published: 2006
rating: 3
read at: 2008/03/07
date added: 2008/03/07
shelves: 2008
review:
I wasn't into this as much as the first book, "Why Do Men Have Nipples?" probably because I got burnt out on trivial health/human biology questions; I read these books not because of the topic, but because I like humorist Mark Leyner's writing. I would still recommend either of the books, just not both to any one person.
]]> <![CDATA[Dark Eye : The Films of David Fincher]]> 1006039 208 James Swallow 1903111528 Patrick 5 2008
"A friend of mine used to say, there's a pervert on every block, there's always one person in every neighborhood who's kind of questionable. I'm looking for that one pervert story."

"What is it that makes your style? It's the things you fuck up as much as the things that you do well, so half your style is stupid mistakes that you consistently make."]]> 4.00 2003 Dark Eye : The Films of David Fincher
author: James Swallow
name: Patrick
average rating: 4.00
book published: 2003
rating: 5
read at: 2008/03/04
date added: 2008/03/04
shelves: 2008
review:
David Fincher is the director of the amazing end-of-the-millenium dytopian trilogy that includes "Seven," "The Game," and "Fight Club." This book goes through each of his movies, detailing sections separated into Synopsis, Development, Production, Cuts and Changes, and Aftermath. Although I do love these movies, the book was much better than I was hoping for. The writer (who is British, which I found surprising) did such a great job making minutiae seem fascinating, and providing anecdotes and quotes from those involved, that I ended up reading the chapters on "Alien 3" and "Panic Room," even though I was planning on skipping them (the book was written prior to "Zodiac," which I also wasn't that keen on.) Maybe the most interesting parts for me were explanations of different things that were NOT in the movies, scenes that were cut out, motivations that were changed, total overhauls of characters, etc. Here are a couple good Fincher quotes from the introduction:

"A friend of mine used to say, there's a pervert on every block, there's always one person in every neighborhood who's kind of questionable. I'm looking for that one pervert story."

"What is it that makes your style? It's the things you fuck up as much as the things that you do well, so half your style is stupid mistakes that you consistently make."
]]> Sharp Objects 66559
Sent to investigate the disappearance of two little girls, Camille finds herself reluctantly installed in the family mansion, reacquainting herself with her distant mother and a precocious thirteen-year-old half-sister she barely knows. Haunted by a family tragedy, troubled by the disquieting grip her young sister has on the town, Camille struggles with a familiar need to be accepted.

But as clues turn into dead ends, Camille finds herself identifying with the young victims and realises: she will have to unravel the puzzle of her own past if she's to survive this homecoming.]]> 254 Gillian Flynn 0307341542 Patrick 5 2008 3.89 2006 Sharp Objects
author: Gillian Flynn
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.89
book published: 2006
rating: 5
read at: 2008/03/04
date added: 2008/03/04
shelves: 2008
review:
I normally don't read murder mysteries, but this was for my exclusive book club, and I found it a pleasant, twisted surprise. The narrator is a 30-ish woman with deep-seated psychological problems whose work as a reporter sends her back to her evil little hometown to cover the murders of two young girls, who have had their teeth removed post-mortem. The book focuses a lot of attention on the messed-up women of the town: the reporter's old clique, who still live their lives as if they were in high school, current teens who mirror her own adolescence, and her mother's friends, who are par for the course. There are plenty of creepy twists, and the book gets darker as it progresses, it can be compared to a more violent version of Tina Fey's movie, "Mean Girls." I liked the writer's voice, which mixed exposition with random one-liners that provide glimpses into the troubled mind of the protagonist. This review sounds really gay to me. Gillian Fynn, strangely enough, is a television critic for "Entertainment Weekly," and I would definitely be excited to see what she does next.
]]> Spin Alternative Record Guide 406355 468 Eric Weisbard 0679755748 Patrick 2 2008 4.15 1995 Spin Alternative Record Guide
author: Eric Weisbard
name: Patrick
average rating: 4.15
book published: 1995
rating: 2
read at:
date added: 2008/02/25
shelves: 2008
review:
I got this used for nostalgia's sake, having flipped through it in the bookstores numerous times when it came out in 1995. An "alternative" record guide, yet begins with sections on ABBA and AC/DC. What? And glaring omission include all the brit-pop bands, like Blur, Oasis, Pulp, and Sleeper, who were in their heyday during this time period. Checking out the profiles of my favorite bands made me realize why I stopped reading record reviews like a decade ago, but I guess it was still kind of fun to look through again.
]]> Grrrls: Viva Rock Divas 430278
"I have always had a certain song in my head, a certain chemistry of sounds."

Kim "I always wanted to rebel."]]> 240 Amy Raphael 0312141092 Patrick 3 2008 Star, Exile in Guyville, and American Thighs, respectively) by the first three artists mentioned above, among others, should be considered the pinacle of music made by female-fronted bands--yet they are still pretty obscure--and how instead, anytime the lame topic "women in rock" comes up, you still hear the same old shit: Blondie, the Pretenders, Pat Benetar, and Janis Joplin, none of whom I've ever given a fuck about.]]> 3.92 1995 Grrrls: Viva Rock Divas
author: Amy Raphael
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.92
book published: 1995
rating: 3
read at: 2008/02/25
date added: 2008/02/25
shelves: 2008
review:
I got this collection of monologues-by-way-of-interview because it features pieces by some awesome alterna-babes from back in the day, such as Tanya Donnelly from Belly, Liz Phair, both girls from Veruca Salt, Bjork, Kim Gordon from Sonic Youth, Courtney Love, Kristin Hersh from Throwing Muses, and the girl from Echobelly. This is a British book so I skipped over a few chapters by/about some bands I don't know/care about (Huggy Bear, the Raincoats, and Sister George). I got kind of mad reading the introduction because it made me think about how the first albums (Star, Exile in Guyville, and American Thighs, respectively) by the first three artists mentioned above, among others, should be considered the pinacle of music made by female-fronted bands--yet they are still pretty obscure--and how instead, anytime the lame topic "women in rock" comes up, you still hear the same old shit: Blondie, the Pretenders, Pat Benetar, and Janis Joplin, none of whom I've ever given a fuck about.
]]> <![CDATA[How Sassy Changed My Life: A Love Letter to the Greatest Teen Magazine of All Time]]> 233745
How Sassy Changed My Life will present for the first time the inside story of the magazine's rise and fall while celebrating its unique vision and lasting impact. Through interviews with the staff, columnists, and favorite personalities we are brought behind the scenes from its launch to its final issue and witness its unique fusion of feminism and femininity, its frank commentary on taboo topics like teen sex and suicide, its battles with advertisers and the religious right, and the ascension of its writers from anonymous staffers to celebrities in their own right.]]> 144 Kara Jesella 0571211852 Patrick 3 2008 3.70 2007 How Sassy Changed My Life: A Love Letter to the Greatest Teen Magazine of All Time
author: Kara Jesella
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.70
book published: 2007
rating: 3
read at:
date added: 2008/02/18
shelves: 2008
review:
So I didn't actually realize at the time that the magazine was that "different" or "revolutionary" than its contemporaries, but I did used to read my younger sister's Sassys once in a while, and although I noticed that they would reference less-than-mainstream topics like riot grrrl or indie bands, for some reason I was under the naive impression that all teen girls' magazines did the same. I might have first heard of Magnapop through the "Cute Band Alert," but can't be sure. One time my bandmate, Mike, made the joke that if we ever got in the magazine, it would be in a new section, retitled "Ugly Band Warning." That was pretty funny. It is kind of shocking to see the bands that were profiled by writer Christina Kelly in that section, including, but not limited to: Guided by Voices, Superchunk, The Jon Spencer Blues Explosion, Bikini Kill, Blonde Redhead, Chavez, Heavenly, Sloan, Ween and That Dog. Halfway throgh the book, I decided I was in love with Kelly, even though she's now in her 40's, I don't know what she looks like, and three different magazines have tanked with her as editor-in-chief. Ouch. The real kicker for me in this book was the short section about my dear lamented "Dirt," which was the incredible, yet short-lived and obscure brother magazine, which only lasted 6 sporatic issues, and could only be found poly-bagged with certain issues of Sassy and a couple Spiderman comic books. It was the creation of three dudes, including Spike Jonze, who later went on to direct famous videos like "Sabotage" by the Beastie Boys, "Cannonball" by the Breeders, and "Feel the Pain" by Dinosaur Jr., as well as movies such as "Being John Malkovich. "Dirt" totally spoke to the alienated teenage boy in all of us with articles kind of paralleling Sassy's, in that they were about issues facing teens, but aimed at an audience that didn't quite fit in, or whose tastes were less-than-mainstream. One cover story was called "How to Win a Fight." An advice column called "Dear Girl" answered readers' letters and featured a different host each time, including Janeane Garofalo and ex-porn star Traci Lords. One issue was simply a hodgepodge of writing and photos from a massive cross-country road trip the staff undertook together, including a taste-test guide to Canadian candybars, which I reenacted when I visited Toronto years later. An article mentioned Superchunk in passing, without actually saying anything about the band, but because I trusted the writers and thought the name sounded cool, I bought "Foolish" the next day. I started my own brilliant publication in 1996 called "Pat: The Magazine for Guys" (patmagazine.com) that wasn't really influenced by "Dirt" but maybe it was a little bit. I looked on ebay for old copies of Sassy, but they're like $50. Anyway, here's to being nostalgic for a shitty time.
]]> <![CDATA[Things I've Learned from Women Who've Dumped Me]]> 2038265
Relationships end. And in almost all of them, even the most callow among us take something away. This is a book about that something, whether it be major life lessons, like "If you lie, you will get caught," simple truths like, "Flowers work," or something wholly unique like, "Watch out for the high strung brother in the military."
This anthology will be comprised of longer and shorter pieces, drawn from an array of impressive celebrities, writers and public figures. Some pieces may be a paragraph in length while others will be full-blown essays. All of them will be about that salient something men take away from a failed relationship. Yes, men learn.
This is not a touchy-feely book. This is not a self-help book. This is a book packed with smart, funny and insightful stories from men you probably thought never got dumped, or if they did, would never admit it.]]> 240 Ben Karlin 0446580694 Patrick 4 2008 3.33 2008 Things I've Learned from Women Who've Dumped Me
author: Ben Karlin
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.33
book published: 2008
rating: 4
read at:
date added: 2008/02/13
shelves: 2008
review:
Really funny collection of essays, including, but not limited to: Bob Odenkirk's transcription of part of his seminar: "9 Years is Exactly the Right Amount of Time to be in a Bad Relationship," Stephen Colbert's would-be heart-warming story that is all but completely blacked out by his wife's marker to keep things private, Will Forte's reminiscence of a girlfriend who kept riding off on another guy's motorcycle but kept insisting they were "just friends," Patton Oswalt comparing his wife at her worst to an ex-stripper girlfriend at her best, Andy Richter, David Wain from "Stella," and more.
]]> <![CDATA[Invasion of the Body Snatchers]]> 127515 224 Jack Finney 0684852586 Patrick 4 2008 3.91 1955 Invasion of the Body Snatchers
author: Jack Finney
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.91
book published: 1955
rating: 4
read at:
date added: 2008/02/11
shelves: 2008
review:
You can fit a lot of cool stuff into just 200 pages: the psychologist's lecture on mass hysteria and other unexplained pheonomena, the main character remembering the shoe-shiner, the professor talking about "space spores." Fast-paced, exciting, and still relevant.
]]> The Nightmare Chronicles 23845
This audiobook also contains the short stories "Underworld," "O Rare and Most Esquisite," "The Rendering Man," "The Fruit of Her Womb," "The Hurting Season," "Chosen," "The Night Before Alec Got Married," "Only Connect," "The Little Mermaid," "Damned if You Do," and "The Ripening Sweetness of Late Afternoon." You can also listen to the acclaimed novelettes, "White Chapel" and "I am Infinite, I Contain Multitudes."]]> 360 Douglas Clegg 084394580X Patrick 4 2008 3.79 2015 The Nightmare Chronicles
author: Douglas Clegg
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.79
book published: 2015
rating: 4
read at: 2008/02/10
date added: 2008/02/10
shelves: 2008
review:
There were some pleasantly creepy moments in this short story collection I found for $2.95 in the dark, dank basement of Chicago's historic used store, Myopic Books. Highlights include stories about a retiree and his wife settling into a house that had previously been the setting for a father's dismemberment and hiding of the body parts of his family, a depression-era girl's fateful encounter with the town renderer, a town hero returning to try and attone for his sins, which were cause for a mandatory curfew, the consequences of which breaking are a fate worse than death, a guy who is really into mermaids, a man who digs holes in his backyard while listening to talk radio really loud, and "The Hurting Season," which is just a good title.
]]> <![CDATA[Bad Girl: Confessions Of A Teenage Delinquent]]> 408955 At fifteen Abigail Vona was Involved with boys, booze, drugs and stealing anything and everything she could lay her hands on. She was spiraling out of control. Helpless to control his daughter, Mr. Vona committed Abigail to Peninusla Village, a controversial treatment facility for “behavior modification� in Louisville, Tennessee. No sooner did she walk through the door she was put on suicide watch which lasted for 3 months. She was not allowed to dress in more than a hospital gown until she graduated to “level-three lockdown� and “wilderness boot camp� where she stayed for nearly a year. And though it all started as a nightmare, it eventually became her salvation.]]> 267 Abigail Vona 1590710517 Patrick 4 2008 3.57 2004 Bad Girl: Confessions Of A Teenage Delinquent
author: Abigail Vona
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.57
book published: 2004
rating: 4
read at: 2008/02/08
date added: 2008/02/08
shelves: 2008
review:
This is a memoir, written by a 19-year-old who had been in a boot-camp type of alternative therapeutic home for a year when she was 15. A chapter or so into it and I oddly found myself in the girl's corner, pissed off at the overbearing staff and their extreme methods and punishments, forcing the girls to do pushups/situps for various minor infractions and making them sit on their beds, not talking, not doing anything, all day long. The girl was put in the home by her father, for her bad behavior, which mainly consisted of smoking pot three times and shoplifting. She was a virgin. Why the fuck is she in a place like this with prostitutes, child molesters, hardcore drug users, and girls prone to fits of extreme violence? I found myself cheering when one of the girls beat up a staff member so bad she had to be hospitalized and another who bit the inside of her mouth so she could spit blood in the face of a staff. The reason it's so weird for me to be rooting for the girls is that I've been on the other side of the fence, teaching at-risk youth at a special ed high school for almost eight years. It's also weird because I never broke the law or got in much trouble in high school at all. Another problem I had with the methods employed by "The Village" was that although the girl looks back and thinks it really helped her, come on, like she's not gonna be drinking and fucking shortly after going back home like any normal teenager? How long could trying to act perfect last? And of course I'm right, because after the book was published when she was a couple years older, she started banging her 50-year-old agent, which doesn't sound healthy to me. Um, anyways it was an engaging book and doesn't really try to teach you any lessons, just a cross-section of someone's experience, so that's cool with me.
]]> <![CDATA[The Big Sleep (Philip Marlowe, #1)]]> 2052
This is an alternate cover edition.]]> 231 Raymond Chandler 0394758285 Patrick 4 2008 3.96 1939 The Big Sleep (Philip Marlowe, #1)
author: Raymond Chandler
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.96
book published: 1939
rating: 4
read at: 2008/02/02
date added: 2008/02/02
shelves: 2008
review:
About 80 pages in, I realized I had lost the plot, but didn't really care because of how amazingly "rich" the inner and outer dialogue of Phillip Marlowe, Chandler's hero private detective, is. It was hard to keep track of all the characters and murders, but if you can get 70%, it's worth it for all the golden tossed-off simile/metaphors that make up the narrative voice that we now think of as noir cliche. One cool thing is that in Stephen King's "On Writing," he mentions how during the filming of the movie, starring Humphrey Bogart, the screenwriters couldn't figure out who killed one of the characters. They got in touch with Chandler, who said, "Oh, the chauffeur, I forgot all about him." That is how you write unapologetic and classy fiction. There's also some hilarious moments that are really offensive by today's standards, he slaps a girl in the face, calls a guy a fag, and when another girl asks if he thinks she's cute, he responds, "As cute as a Filipino on a Saturday night." I don't even know what that means, but at least now I have an answer next time someone asks me that. I am starting my fucking Private Eye business ASAP.
]]> <![CDATA[Modest Mouse: A Pretty Good Read]]> 767681
Unruly and antagonistic, the Washington State rock trio Modest Mouse would seem like one of the least likely candidates for mainstream Their often brilliant live performances sometimes collapsed into utter chaos. Their highly original, highly off-center songs ran as long as eleven minutes. And their leader managed to raise eyebrows among music writers, law officials . . . and sometimes even his fans.

But Modest Mouse persevered. They didn't compromise their original, compelling musical style, nor did they lighten up on the attitude. They just waited for the world at large to catch up.

In 2004, with the release of their smash single "Float On," it finally happened. And it was worth the wait. For everybody.

Journalist Alan Goldsher uncovers the strange, little-known details of Modest Mouse's rise from DIY indie heroes to platinum-selling, Grammy-nominated international superstars. Goldsher also reveals the troubled background and fractured history of frontman Isaac Brock, a charismatic, cantankerous singer/songwriter who has spent as much time avoiding the media as he has attempting to control it.

Thoroughly researched, sharply funny, and filled with more than thirty rare photos, this unauthorized biography shows how Modest Mouse trashed the Behind the Music mold and created their own unique version of the rock 'n' roll, rags-to-expensive-rags success story.]]> 208 Alan Goldsher 0312356013 Patrick 1 2008 2.98 2006 Modest Mouse: A Pretty Good Read
author: Alan Goldsher
name: Patrick
average rating: 2.98
book published: 2006
rating: 1
read at: 2008/01/01
date added: 2008/02/01
shelves: 2008
review:
Ok, on the plus side, this guy did something I've always wanted to see in a music bio, that being an analysis of every single song. Everything else he did was horrible. First of all, he keeps refering to "lo-fi" as a musical genre, which it is not, it just means that in most bands' early days they don't have money for recording studios so they record themselves on 4 or 8 track machines. That's like saying Betamax is a type of movie like comedy or romance. Then he starts talking about the songs in terms of music theory, which is the kiss of death because anyone who is not a seasoned musician is going to have no idea what you're talking about when you start mentioning time signatures, like, "This song has an unexpected break into 4/5 time," and then starts talking about chords, like "This song is a typical C/D/G," and then goes so far as to nickname a certain type of chord progression after songwriter Issac Brock, "We'll label these types of songs an 'Issac Downward Progression,' or 'IDP' for short," which he uses throughout the book. You have got to be fucking kidding me, dude. Once you play a note, you are either going to go up or down with the next one, you can't go sideways. As if this wasn't annoying enough, he intrusively talks about himself randomly in the book, which you can ignore for awhile, up until one interlude where he fucking tells a story about his nu-metal band touring with 311 in 1993, and how when his band played, they would make themselves "accessible" after the show to talk to people because they didn't want to seem like "primadonnas." WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU? NO ONE HAS EVER HEARD OF YOUR FUCKING BAND, YOU'RE NOT A ROCK STAR. THERE IS NO POSSIBLE POINT YOU COULD EVER MAKE ABOUT MODEST MOUSE THAT WOULD REQUIRE YOU TO INVOKE THE NAME 311, YOU DUMB SHIT. Seriously, why did no one stop this guy? His editor was either his girlfriend, his little brother, or somehow just as retarded as him. Wow. I almost put the book down right then and there but I only had 30 more pages. Oh my Christ, why?
]]> <![CDATA[Ron Jeremy: The Hardest (Working) Man in Showbiz]]> 234026
You probably think you already know me because you've seen one of my two thousand porn movies, or maybe you caught me on VH1's The Surreal Life, or rented my movie Pornstar, or heard me rapping in someone's music video. . . . Yeah, that's me. But believe it or not, that's not the real me. The real me is just an average guy trying to make it in the world like everyone else.

Well . . . sort of . . .

I always wanted to be a legitimate actor (that's right, don't laugh). But when the gigs didn't come I didn't let it get me down. Instead, I'd fall into the arms of beautiful women and let them heal my bruised soul. One of them insisted on taking nude pictures of me and sending them to Playgirl. For some reason I agreed, and when it was published, I got tons of phone calls. One of them was from a casting director who wanted me in his next picture. There was only one problem: it was a porno.

"What do you think?" I asked my dad.

He rubbed his chin and paused for a moment.

"I think you should do it," he said. "I mean, you're already halfway there, and . . . at least you'll be performing, right?"

That's exactly what I thought. From there, my life only got better. I traveled all over the world, made tons of money, and got more famous every year. But more than anything, I wanted to be legit, so I started doing stand-up comedy, moved to Hollywood, and kept my acting hopes alive by mingling with every major—Wait a minute, you don't care about any of this, do you? You just want to know about the celebrity orgies, the constant sex, and how I learned to blow myself. . . . All right, fine.

But keep reading. . . . I guarantee you'll get more than you bargained for. . . .

—Ron Jeremy]]> 343 Ron Jeremy 006084082X Patrick 3 2008 3.49 2007 Ron Jeremy: The Hardest (Working) Man in Showbiz
author: Ron Jeremy
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.49
book published: 2007
rating: 3
read at:
date added: 2008/01/31
shelves: 2008
review:
I still have never seen a Ron Jeremy or Jenna Jameson porno, yet I've read both of their autobiographies. His was kind of the yin to her yang; where hers was kind of depressing and involved rape and drug addiction, his was light-hearted, filled with funny anecdotes, and he never did drugs or drank to excess, so maybe there's a lesson in there somewhere.
]]> Neverwhere (London Below, #1) 14497
"Neverwhere" is the London of the people who have fallen between the cracks.

Strange destinies lie in wait in London below - a world that seems eerily familiar. But a world that is utterly bizarre, peopled by unearthly characters such as the Angel called Islington, the girl named Door, and the Earl who holds Court on a tube train.

Now a single act of kindness has catapulted young businessman Richard Mayhew out of his safe and predictable life - and into the realms of "Neverwhere." Richard is about to find out more than he ever wanted to know about this other London. Which is a pity. Because Richard just wants to go home...]]> 370 Neil Gaiman 0060557818 Patrick 3 2008 4.17 1996 Neverwhere (London Below, #1)
author: Neil Gaiman
name: Patrick
average rating: 4.17
book published: 1996
rating: 3
read at: 2008/01/01
date added: 2008/01/23
shelves: 2008
review:
I definitely like "The Sandman" better than Gaiman's novels. This "Alice in Wonderland" type of story about a man falling through the cracks into the dark, magical realm of "London Underground" was good, but I didn't find myself thinking much about it or racing to get back to it.
]]> <![CDATA[Mortified 2: Love is a Battlefield]]> 822610
From starter girlfriends to escapist fantasies to delusional attempts to stand out amongst their peers, Mortified: Love Is a Battlefield revisits the boundlessly embarrassing topic of childhood love, uncovering priceless artifacts of authentic teen angst that tell of unrequited crushes, awkward hookups, odd celebrity infatuations, and all manner of romantic catastrophes. The now older (and allegedly wiser) authors of these letters, lyrics, and journals bravely share their shame in stories that range from sweetly hopeful to borderline psychotic.

Everyone who ever obsessed over whether that guy or girl in algebra class liked them, or, y'know, liked them liked them, will relish this funny and touching valentine to our collective past]]> 285 David Nadelberg 1416954791 Patrick 4 2008 3.54 2008 Mortified 2: Love is a Battlefield
author: David Nadelberg
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.54
book published: 2008
rating: 4
read at:
date added: 2008/01/17
shelves: 2008
review:
Just as good as the first one.
]]> <![CDATA[Why Do Men Have Nipples?: Hundreds of Questions You'd Only Ask a Doctor After Your Third Martini]]> 131529
Say you’re at a party. You’ve had a martini or three, and you mingle through the crowd, wondering how long you need to stay before going out for pizza. Suddenly you’re introduced to someone new, Dr. Nice Tomeetya. You forget the pizza. Now is the perfect time to bring up all those strange questions you’d like to ask during an office visit with your own doctor but haven’t had the guts (or more likely the time) to do so. You’re filled with liquid courage . . . now is your chance! If you’ve ever wanted to ask a doctor . . .

•How do people in wheelchairs have sex?

•Why do I get a killer headache when I suck down my milkshake too fast?

•Can I lose my contact lens inside my head forever?

•Why does asparagus make my pee smell?

•Why do old people grow hair on their ears?

•Is the old adage “beer before liquor, never sicker, liquor before beer . . .� really true?

. . . then Why Do Men Have Nipples? is the book for you.

Compiled by Billy Goldberg, an emergency medicine physician, and Mark Leyner, bestselling author and well-known satirist, Why Do Men Have Nipples? offers real factual and really funny answers to some of the big questions about the oddities of our bodies.]]> 224 Mark Leyner 1400082315 Patrick 5 2008 3.41 1995 Why Do Men Have Nipples?: Hundreds of Questions You'd Only Ask a Doctor After Your Third Martini
author: Mark Leyner
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.41
book published: 1995
rating: 5
read at:
date added: 2008/01/17
shelves: 2008
review:
Kamikaze absurdist Leyner teams with an M.D. to provide funny, yet educational answers to bizarre medical questions. The book includes some of their random instant messages to each other and each chapter begins at a different point in a fictional party they're attending.
]]> <![CDATA[The Dead Travel Fast: Stalking Vampires from Nosferatu to Count Chocula]]> 812071 The undead are everywhere. They're not just in movies and books, but in commercials, fetish clubs, and even in your breakfast cereal. If you look, you'll discover that bloodsuckers have gone from guest spots in rural folk tales to becoming some of the most recognizable bad guys in the modern world. Eric Nuzum wanted to find out why and how this happened. And he found the answer in Goth clubs, darkened parks, haunted houses, and� chain restaurants.
Nuzum was willing to do whatever it took to better understand the vampire phenomenon. He traveled across Transylvania on a tour hosted by Butch Patrick (a.k.a. Eddie Munster), sat through Las Vegas' only topless vampire revue, hung out with assorted shady characters, and spent hours in a coffin. He even drank his own blood --just one more step in his quest to understand the weird, offbeat world of vampires and the people who love them.
The Dead Travel Fast is the hilarious result of this bloody, gory, and often foolhardy journey. With his unmatched firsthand experience, Eric Nuzum delivers a far-reaching look at vampires in pop culture, from Bram to Bela to Buffy, and at what vampires and vampirism have come to mean to us today.
And the blood? Let's just say it doesn't go with eggs.]]> 242 Eric Nuzum 031237111X Patrick 4 2008 3.67 2007 The Dead Travel Fast: Stalking Vampires from Nosferatu to Count Chocula
author: Eric Nuzum
name: Patrick
average rating: 3.67
book published: 2007
rating: 4
read at:
date added: 2008/01/17
shelves: 2008
review:
Funny exploration of the vampire mythos and what it has come to symbolize in modern times. The author gives fascinating histories of Vlad the Impaler, Bram Stoker, etc. goes on a trip to Romania, interviews goth kids at T.G.I.Friday's, and vomits after drinking a chilled cup of his own blood.
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