en-US Sun, 29 Dec 2024 22:08:53 -0800 60 144 41 /images/layout/goodreads_logo_144.jpg 43841280 From the highly acclaimed, award-winning author of The Gods of Tango, a revolutionary new novel about five wildly different women who, in the midst of the Uruguayan dictatorship, find each other as lovers, friends, and ultimately, family.

In 1977 Uruguay, a military government has crushed political dissent with ruthless force. In an environment where citizens are kidnapped, raped, and tortured, homosexuality is a dangerous transgression. And yet Romina, Flaca, Anita "La Venus," Paz, and Malena--five cantoras, women who "sing"--somehow, miraculously, find each other and then, together, discover an isolated, nearly uninhabited cape, Cabo Polonio, which they claim as their secret sanctuary. Over the next 35 years, their lives move back and forth between Cabo Polonio and Montevideo, the city they call home, as they return, sometimes together, sometimes in pairs, with lovers in tow, or alone. And throughout, again and again, the women will be tested--by their families, lovers, society, and each other--as they fight to live authentic lives.
A genre-defining novel and De Robertis's masterpiece, Cantoras is a breathtaking portrait of queer love, community, forgotten history, and the strength of the human spirit. At once timeless and groundbreaking, Cantoras is a tale about the fire in all our souls and those who make it burn.]]> 336 Carolina De Robertis 0525521704 kavya 5 4.39 2019
author: Carolina De Robertis
name: kavya
average rating: 4.39
book published: 2019
rating: 5
read at: 2024/12/29
date added: 2024/12/29
shelves: my-dearly-beloveds, books-of-my-soul, friendship-focus, historical, multiple-pov, queer-fam, sapphic
review:

]]> 50523477 Empire of Sand and Realm of Ash Tasha Suri's The Jasmine Throne, beginning a new trilogy set in a world inspired by the history and epics of India, in which a captive princess and a maidservant in possession of forbidden magic become unlikely allies on a dark journey to save their empire from the princess's traitor brother.

Imprisoned by her dictator brother, Malini spends her days in isolation in the Hirana: an ancient temple that was once the source of the powerful, magical deathless waters � but is now little more than a decaying ruin.

Priya is a maidservant, one among several who make the treacherous journey to the top of the Hirana every night to clean Malini’s chambers. She is happy to be an anonymous drudge, so long as it keeps anyone from guessing the dangerous secret she hides.

But when Malini accidentally bears witness to Priya’s true nature, their destinies become irrevocably tangled. One is a vengeful princess seeking to depose her brother from his throne. The other is a priestess seeking to find her family. Together, they will change the fate of an empire.]]> 533 Tasha Suri 0356515648 kavya 3 4.12 2021
author: Tasha Suri
name: kavya
average rating: 4.12
book published: 2021
rating: 3
read at: 2021/08/13
date added: 2024/10/14
shelves: fantasy, multiple-pov, gay-angst, sapphic
review:

]]> 42603984
Welcome to Niveus Private Academy, where money paves the hallways, and the students are never less than perfect. Until now. Because anonymous texter, Aces, is bringing two students' dark secrets to light.

Talented musician Devon buries himself in rehearsals, but he can't escape the spotlight when his private photos go public. Head girl Chiamaka isn't afraid to get what she wants, but soon everyone will know the price she has paid for power.

Someone is out to get them both. Someone who holds all the aces. And they're planning much more than a high-school game...]]> 470 Faridah Àbíké-Íyímídé 1474967531 kavya 3
but what we got was (spoiler alert) "every character in this story except the 3 Black main characters including the press and LITERALLY every single white person living in the ENTIRE town with zero exceptions are part of this intricate horrible and extremely complicated secret society plan thing where they go out of their way to torture the only two Black students at the school to death every year because they're Black and want to kill all Black people" and I'm sorry but I just found it hard to suspend my disbelief that much. im pretty sure not every racist is this much of a cartoon villain. this was so bafflingly loosely plotted

that aside if you ignore the whole mystery component this had great writing great character work amazing social commentary and I'm still definitely reading the next book faridah publishes at all costs]]> 4.15 2021
author: Faridah Àbíké-Íyímídé
name: kavya
average rating: 4.15
book published: 2021
rating: 3
read at: 2021/08/26
date added: 2024/07/08
shelves: multiple-pov, mystery-thriller, sapphic, dark-academia, friends-to-lovers, dnf, achillean, reviewed-with-success
review:
listen when i heard about a dark academia book challenging deeply ingrained racist institutions I was impressed and excited because I'd never seen that message so blatantly expressed in the genre without pandering to white people even a little before. but what I thought and what this book led me to believe that entailed for the first three quarters was something along the lines of "being white and growing up in a primarily white society with a history of slavery and deep racism conditions white people to be inherently racist and that is visible to some degree in everything they do and that is why people of colour automatically don't trust them and instead of complaining about how acting like calling them out on their racism is a bigger crime than said racism itself and doubling down defensively they should shut the fuck up and listen to poc and consciously work on unlearning the bias reinforced to them every day which almost none of them are willing to do because it hurts their fragile egos so yeah all white people are racist" - which is a great premise that would inevitably piss said white people off and i loved it?

but what we got was (spoiler alert) "every character in this story except the 3 Black main characters including the press and LITERALLY every single white person living in the ENTIRE town with zero exceptions are part of this intricate horrible and extremely complicated secret society plan thing where they go out of their way to torture the only two Black students at the school to death every year because they're Black and want to kill all Black people" and I'm sorry but I just found it hard to suspend my disbelief that much. im pretty sure not every racist is this much of a cartoon villain. this was so bafflingly loosely plotted

that aside if you ignore the whole mystery component this had great writing great character work amazing social commentary and I'm still definitely reading the next book faridah publishes at all costs
]]> 31194576
Time is running out though, because way across town a ghost as risen from the lake. Searching, yearning, she leaves a trail of destruction in her wake…]]> 287 Patrick Ness 1406377279 kavya 3 3.65 2017
author: Patrick Ness
name: kavya
average rating: 3.65
book published: 2017
rating: 3
read at: 2019/09/21
date added: 2023/06/03
shelves: multiple-pov, non-traditional-writing-format, achillean, elevated-horror-vibes
review:
3.5 stars, though I'd REALLY give it a 5 if it weren't for the whole paranormal element of this book. It was JUST FINE as a contemporary, and the rest of it wasn't necessary. At all. You could just skip over all of it and it wouldn't make a difference.
]]> 22299763
Kaz Brekker and his crew of deadly outcasts have just pulled off a heist so daring even they didn't think they'd survive. But instead of divvying up a fat reward, they're right back to fighting for their lives.

Double-crossed and badly weakened, the crew is low on resources, allies, and hope. As powerful forces from around the world descend on Ketterdam to root out the secrets of the dangerous drug known as jurda parem, old rivals and new enemies emerge to challenge Kaz's cunning and test the team's fragile loyalties.

A war will be waged on the city's dark and twisting streets - a battle for revenge and redemption that will decide the fate of the Grisha world.]]> 561 Leigh Bardugo kavya 5 i wanna reread this now:( 4.58 2016
author: Leigh Bardugo
name: kavya
average rating: 4.58
book published: 2016
rating: 5
read at: 2019/08/02
date added: 2023/03/22
shelves: fantasy, multiple-pov, achillean
review:
i wanna reread this now:(
]]> 36341204
Ben thinks the universe needs to mind its business. If the universe had his back, he wouldn’t be on his way to the post office carrying a box of his ex-boyfriend’s things.

But when Arthur and Ben meet-cute at the post office, what exactly does the universe have in store for them?

Maybe nothing. After all, they get separated.

Maybe everything. After all, they get reunited.

But what if they can’t quite nail a first date . . . or a second first date . . . or a third?

What if Arthur tries too hard to make it work . . . and Ben doesn’t try hard enough?

What if life really isn’t like a Broadway play?

But what if it is?]]> 437 Becky Albertalli 0062795252 kavya 5 4.5 stars. 3.81 2018
author: Becky Albertalli
name: kavya
average rating: 3.81
book published: 2018
rating: 5
read at: 2019/06/02
date added: 2023/03/16
shelves: multiple-pov, romance, achillean
review:
4.5 stars.
]]> 34325090
Jimmy Kaga-Ricci owes everything to The Ark too. He’s their frontman � and playing in a band is all he’s ever dreamed of doing. It’s just a shame that recently everything in his life seems to have turned into a bit of a nightmare.

Because łŮłó˛ąłŮ’s the problem with dreaming â€� eventually, inevitably, real life arrives with a wake-up call. And when Angel and Jimmy are unexpectedly thrust together, they will discover just how strange and surprising facing up to reality can be.]]> 396 Alice Oseman 0008244103 kavya 3 4.02 2018
author: Alice Oseman
name: kavya
average rating: 4.02
book published: 2018
rating: 3
read at: 2020/04/09
date added: 2022/11/19
shelves: teen-realistic-fic, multiple-pov, friendship-focus, mentit-illness, online-love, queer-fam, trans, achillean
review:

]]> 7736182 JASON HAS A PROBLEM. He doesn’t remember anything before waking up in a bus full of kids on a field trip. Apparently he has a girlfriend named Piper, and his best friend is a guy named Leo. They’re all students at the Wilderness School, a boarding school for “bad kids," as Leo puts it. What did Jason do to end up here? And where is here, exactly? Jason doesn't know anything—except that everything seems very wrong.

PIPER HAS A SECRET. Her father has been missing for three days, ever since she had that terrifying nightmare about his being in trouble. Piper doesn’t understand her dream, or why her boyfriend suddenly doesn’t recognize her. When a freak storm hits during the school trip, unleashing strange creatures and whisking her, Jason, and Leo away to someplace called Camp Half-Blood, she has a feeling she’s going to find out, whether she wants to or not.

LEO HAS A WAY WITH TOOLS. When he sees his cabin at Camp Half-Blood, filled with power tools and machine parts, he feels right at home. But there’s weird stuff, too—like the curse everyone keeps talking about, and some camper who's gone missing. Weirdest of all, his bunkmates insist that each of them—including Leo—is related to a god. Does this have anything to do with Jason's amnesia, or the fact that Leo keeps seeing ghosts?

Join new and old friends from Camp Half-Blood in this thrilling first book in The Heroes of Olympus series. Best-selling author Rick Riordan has pumped up the action, humor, suspense, and mystery in an epic adventure that will leave readers panting for the next installment.]]> 576 Rick Riordan 142311339X kavya 4 4.28 2010
author: Rick Riordan
name: kavya
average rating: 4.28
book published: 2010
rating: 4
read at:
date added: 2022/09/06
shelves: fantasy, middle-grade, multiple-pov
review:
one thing about me is that I'm a lost trio fangirl and apologist before all else:)
]]> 18705209 Nico had warned them. Going through the House of Hades would stir the demigods' worst memories. Their ghosts would become restless. Nico may actually become a ghost if he has to shadow-travel with Reyna and Coach Hedge one more time. But that might be better than the alternative: allowing someone else to die, as Hades foretold.

Jason's ghost is his mother, who abandoned him when he was little. He may not know how he is going to prove himself as a leader, but he does know that he will not break promises like she did. He will complete his line of the prophecy: To storm or fire the world must fall.

Reyna fears the ghosts of her ancestors, who radiate anger. But she can't allow them to distract her from getting the Athena Parthenos to Camp Half-Blood before war breaks out between the Romans and Greeks. Will she have enough strength to succeed, especially with a deadly hunter on her trail?

Leo fears that his plan won't work, that his friends might interfere. But there is no other way. All of them know that one of the Seven has to die in order to defeat Gaea, the Earth Mother.

Piper must learn to give herself over to fear. Only then will she be able to do her part at the end: utter a single word.

Heroes, gods, and monsters all have a role to play in the climactic fulfillment of the prophecy in The Blood of Olympus, the electrifying finale of the best-selling Heroes of Olympus series.]]> 516 Rick Riordan kavya 5 4.42 2014
author: Rick Riordan
name: kavya
average rating: 4.42
book published: 2014
rating: 5
read at: 2016/05/03
date added: 2022/09/06
shelves: multiple-pov, middle-grade, fantasy
review:

]]> 948090
With her feet bare (those glass slippers don't fit) and her second-hand gown splattered with mud (thanks, evil stepsisters), Ella's first day of Princess School is off to a lousy start. If she can only find her fairy godmother before the first class begins, Ella is sure she'll put things right. But her FG is off at a convention and Ella is on her own--she'll have to get through the first weeks of Princess School without any bobbity-boo. Ella is terrified--until she meets silly Snow, spunky Rapunzel, and beautiful, sheltered Rose. Ella's new friends make Princess School (continued)]]> 144 Jane B. Mason 0439545323 kavya 4 3.85 2004
author: Jane B. Mason
name: kavya
average rating: 3.85
book published: 2004
rating: 4
read at: 2015/01/01
date added: 2022/06/29
shelves: middle-grade, multiple-pov, cant-find
review:

]]> 1651302 IN ROSEWOOD, PENNSYLVANIA, FOUR PERFECT-LOOKING GIRLS AREN'T NEARLY AS PERFECT AS THEY SEEM.

Aria can't resist her forbidden ex. Hanna is on the verge of losing her BFF. Emily is freaking out over a simple kiss. And Spencer can't keep her hands off anything that belongs to her sister.

Lucky me. I know these pretty little liars better than they know themselves. But it's hard keeping all of their secrets to myself. They better do as I say... or else!]]> 298 Sara Shepard 0060887370 kavya 4 3.95 2007
author: Sara Shepard
name: kavya
average rating: 3.95
book published: 2007
rating: 4
read at: 2021/12/29
date added: 2022/06/23
shelves: friendship-focus, multiple-pov, mystery-thriller, online-love
review:

]]> 44017627
Simon Snow did everything he was supposed to do. He beat the villain. He won the war. He even fell in love. Now comes the good part, right? Now comes the happily ever after�

So why can’t Simon Snow get off the couch?

What he needs, according to his best friend, is a change of scenery. He just needs to see himself in a new light�

That’s how Simon and Penny and Baz end up in a vintage convertible, tearing across the American West.

They find trouble, of course. (Dragons, vampires, skunk-headed things with shotguns.) And they get lost. They get so lost, they start to wonder whether they ever knew where they were headed in the first place�

With Wayward Son, Rainbow Rowell has written a book for everyone who ever wondered what happened to the Chosen One after he saved the day. And a book for everyone who was ever more curious about the second kiss than the first. It’s another helping of sour cherry scones with an absolutely decadent amount of butter.

Come on, Simon Snow. Your hero’s journey might be over � but your life has just begun.]]> 356 Rainbow Rowell 1250146070 kavya 4 3.89 2019
author: Rainbow Rowell
name: kavya
average rating: 3.89
book published: 2019
rating: 4
read at: 2019/01/01
date added: 2022/06/23
shelves: romance, multiple-pov, fantasy, achillean
review:

]]> 33385229
Mateo and Rufus are total strangers, but, for different reasons, they’re both looking to make a new friend on their End Day. The good news: There’s an app for that. It’s called the Last Friend, and through it, Rufus and Mateo are about to meet up for one last great adventure—to live a lifetime in a single day.

Adam Silvera reminds us that there’s no life without death and no love without loss in this devastating yet uplifting story about two people whose lives change over the course of one unforgettable day.]]> 389 Adam Silvera 0062457799 kavya 4 multiple-pov, achillean 3.76 2017
author: Adam Silvera
name: kavya
average rating: 3.76
book published: 2017
rating: 4
read at: 2019/05/04
date added: 2022/06/23
shelves: multiple-pov, achillean
review:

]]> 23437156 Alternate cover of ISBN 9781627792127

Ketterdam: a bustling hub of international trade where anything can be had for the right price—and no one knows that better than criminal prodigy Kaz Brekker. Kaz is offered a chance at a deadly heist that could make him rich beyond his wildest dreams. But he can’t pull it off alone...

A convict with a thirst for revenge

A sharpshooter who can’t walk away from a wager

A runaway with a privileged past

A spy known as the Wraith

A Heartrender using her magic to survive the slums

A thief with a gift for unlikely escapes

Six dangerous outcasts. One impossible heist. Kaz’s crew is the only thing that might stand between the world and destruction—if they don’t kill each other first.]]> 480 Leigh Bardugo 1627792120 kavya 3
(PLEASE NOTE THIS REVIEW WAS WRITTEN AT 2:15 A.M. AND IS SEMI-COHERENT AT BEST.)

3.5 stars.

THIS BOOK.

No, I will not be gushing about my COMPLETE AND WHOLEHEARTED ADORATION for this book for most of this review, unlike seemingly everyone else who's part of this community. You can relax. Because...I did not love this book.
I liked it! And the second book was amazing. But this was just...eh.

The first two-thirds of this book were just. So. BORING. I DNFed it approximately a hundred times, but due to the sheer power of my BFF's nagging ('cause that's what best friends are for, right?) (also the nagging of seemingly every freaking member of this community), I ploughed through. So...the million-dollar-question: was it worth it?

This book alone? Mayyyyybe. It did kinda redeem itself, I guess.

The fact that reading it meant I got to read the sequel? YES. TOTALLY, 300% WORTH IT.

But this is my review of book ONE, even though the odds of my reviewing book two are...questionable, to say the least. It's all in the hands of fate, baby (for more reference, scroll to the end of this review).

And for almost the entirety of book one,

I hated Kaz. (This did not change after finishing book two. He's just so boring and cruel and hard-hearted and morally...black. Screw all the reviews claiming he's "layered" or "well-developed" or "morally grey". Okay, don't screw them, but there's nothing in this book or even the sequel to redeem Kaz or to prove he had any human emotions, any conscience. Just a lil' cliched backstory informing us that he used to [be a somewhat normal, "boring" human being (and not a perenially demented troll) once upon a time], but he had to "toughen up" because *sigh* circumstances. He's also a ginormous d*ck, 100% of the time, to practically everyone except his love interest, to whom he's a d*ck to only approximately 98% of the time. He wasn't interesting because his personality was virtually non-existent, unless you count his oh-so-emotional backstory. LISTEN UP, FOLKS: BACKSTORY DOES NOT EQUAL PERSONALITY. It's simply a tool to help a character get there, to develop and/or bring out that latent character. Which totally wasn't the case with Mr. Brekker. I'm all for morally-grey characters, but he just...wasn't it. Basically your average, stereotypical bad boy except somehow a hundred times more annoying. AND CONDESCENDING. SO CONDESCENDING.)

I hated Inej. (OH MY GOD THIS CHANGED SO MUCH IN BOOK TWO! INEJ IS A QUEEN. PRACTICALLY A GODDESS. SHE'S PERFECT. In book one, though...she's just Kaz's annoying sidekick with barely any personality of her own, just present to inevitably end up as his love interest (thank God that didn't happen right away, I'd have sued). Also...unsurprisingly...with a tragic backstory. Okay, I didn't care much for the backstory in book one, but OH. MY. GOD. It hit me like a big yellow school bus approximately halfway thorough second one. I want to murder everyone who's ever laid a finger on Inej. I was SO happy when she set out to serve herself justice. Iconic.)

I loved Nina. (I still do. That's all.)

I liked Jesper, although both he and Nina desperately needed more chapters in this book.

I was indifferent toward Matthias. (He grew on me a little more in the second book.)

Wylan...ehhhhh. I don't know. He was just...there, but I still kind of liked him? His arc (by which I mean plot arc, his character arc was virtually non-existent) and relationship with his dad was heartbreaking. Also...JesperxWylan forever. I was practically starved for their scenes throughout this book.

(That was my take on the characters, obviously the most memorable aspect of this book. I'll be addressing everything remaining in listless one- or two- liners because I honestly can't bring myself to care as much about them in comparison. I apologize in advance.)

ANYWAY. The plot was...eh. I didn't care much for it at first, although I was suddenly, inexplicably invested when things picked up pace during the last third.

I loathed the writing. It just...dragged on and on and on. Which made everything so much more unbearable when I was already on the verge of ditching it and then spending the rest of my existence stuck with a bitter, very severe case of FOMO. Because evidently, y'all will never stop raving about this book. (Again, justified. Crooked Kingdom was - is - truly a masterpiece.)

Bardugo definitely put a lot of thought and planning into the setting and politics of her world, and it shows. But...I'd never want to live there. It isn't your usual idealistic kind of fantasy world (the kind that, y'know, you usually read fantasy for. It destroys the point of "fantastical escapism" and should never have been marketed as one, but for what it's worth, it was still SO BRILLIANTLY DEVELOPED objectively speaking). I'd rather die, actually *shudders*. I'm a big softie.

The whole "jurda parem" concept and how it affected the economy of the world was SO PERFECTLY PLOTTED. AHHHHH. Leigh Bardugo's brain, I swear. This book is worth reading just for that.

This book was also incredibly diverse and the diversity was actually pretty well-done.

And...oh, yep. THE JOOST CHAPTER. WHY. WHY. WHY. WHY TF WAS IT NECESSARY. I kept putting this book off because I couldn't make it through the cursed prologue. And this is a trend the author follows with all her books, as far as I can tell. WHY WOULD YOU WRITE A DREARY, 15-PAGE LONG PROLOGUE THAT DOESN'T AFFECT THE REST OF YOUR STORY IN ANY DAMN WAY?! Literally, it was just SO POINTLESS. My advice to the 2 or so people who still haven't read this book: if you're intending to plough through...skip the prologue. You won't regret it.

Also...the world was kinda confusing to me at first, mostly 'cause I've never read Shadow And Bone (the trilogy preceding this one - where you're originally introduced to this world - for all you noobs out there - also ahhhhh that just felt so good to type out). Since most of the world-building was done there, we had to plunge right into this book with no kind of parachute or safety net.

Would I recommend the experience?

SPOILER ALERT (not really): it was BAFFLING AND OVERWHELMING AS HELL (but also kinda refreshingly cool, tbh). I had to skim the Wiki page before reading the book, which actually really helped! 10/10 experience, highly recommended to anyone (like me) wary of the first trilogy because of the terrible reviews and/or because you're reading this one solely because of peer pressure and aren't interested in forcing yourself through three other fat books you aren't particularly interested in. Unless you end up falling hard for this one, of course (which, not gonna lie, you probably will...IF you make it to the end).

That's all. I don't know if I'd recommend this to anyone, or advise them to head straight to book the second instead (no, that'd be too confusing). I just...don't know. I suck at life advice.

But fair warning: it is a bit of a - no, a huge, EPIC snoozefest at first. If you really think you have it in you to force yourself through 200 bland pages to get to the good stuff, though...

*shrugs*

------
3.5 stars. The ending (the last third of the book) was AMAZING, but it took (a lot of) time to pick up the pace.
------
hello vaguest and most obscure corner of the internet aka probably nobody,

it's close to midnight, I don't want to sleep and really feel like I need to get some kind of writing in some shape or form done to stop myself from going crazy (as part of my goal to write a little every day, even if I'm kind of cheating because this obviously doesn't count). I'll be up writing these reviews for a while. even if the concerned books have been reviewed a thousand times already and I'm probably writing his into the void, thus defeating the purpose of this site.
(okay, it's mostly because I started blogging recently and feel like I should be writing a post right now but don't feel like writing anything I'll need to edit later. hopefully if I ever need to recommend/rant about this to a friend or on my blog (optimistically assuming I continue with it), it'll come in use. and it'll make it easier to sort through crap if I'm looking back, I guess.

I'll be picking these out of my "read" shelf randomly so who knows what long-forgotten nuggets i'll be finding!

(also, yes, I'll be copy-pasting this onto every book that I'll be reviewing as part of this "project", even if it's longer than some of the reviews themselves. whopee.)

~me
------
My Blog: ]]> 4.47 2015
author: Leigh Bardugo
name: kavya
average rating: 4.47
book published: 2015
rating: 3
read at: 2019/07/23
date added: 2022/06/23
shelves: fantasy, multiple-pov, reviewed-with-success, achillean
review:
06/04/2020, approximately 9 months after reading this

(PLEASE NOTE THIS REVIEW WAS WRITTEN AT 2:15 A.M. AND IS SEMI-COHERENT AT BEST.)

3.5 stars.

THIS BOOK.

No, I will not be gushing about my COMPLETE AND WHOLEHEARTED ADORATION for this book for most of this review, unlike seemingly everyone else who's part of this community. You can relax. Because...I did not love this book.
I liked it! And the second book was amazing. But this was just...eh.

The first two-thirds of this book were just. So. BORING. I DNFed it approximately a hundred times, but due to the sheer power of my BFF's nagging ('cause that's what best friends are for, right?) (also the nagging of seemingly every freaking member of this community), I ploughed through. So...the million-dollar-question: was it worth it?

This book alone? Mayyyyybe. It did kinda redeem itself, I guess.

The fact that reading it meant I got to read the sequel? YES. TOTALLY, 300% WORTH IT.

But this is my review of book ONE, even though the odds of my reviewing book two are...questionable, to say the least. It's all in the hands of fate, baby (for more reference, scroll to the end of this review).

And for almost the entirety of book one,

I hated Kaz. (This did not change after finishing book two. He's just so boring and cruel and hard-hearted and morally...black. Screw all the reviews claiming he's "layered" or "well-developed" or "morally grey". Okay, don't screw them, but there's nothing in this book or even the sequel to redeem Kaz or to prove he had any human emotions, any conscience. Just a lil' cliched backstory informing us that he used to [be a somewhat normal, "boring" human being (and not a perenially demented troll) once upon a time], but he had to "toughen up" because *sigh* circumstances. He's also a ginormous d*ck, 100% of the time, to practically everyone except his love interest, to whom he's a d*ck to only approximately 98% of the time. He wasn't interesting because his personality was virtually non-existent, unless you count his oh-so-emotional backstory. LISTEN UP, FOLKS: BACKSTORY DOES NOT EQUAL PERSONALITY. It's simply a tool to help a character get there, to develop and/or bring out that latent character. Which totally wasn't the case with Mr. Brekker. I'm all for morally-grey characters, but he just...wasn't it. Basically your average, stereotypical bad boy except somehow a hundred times more annoying. AND CONDESCENDING. SO CONDESCENDING.)

I hated Inej. (OH MY GOD THIS CHANGED SO MUCH IN BOOK TWO! INEJ IS A QUEEN. PRACTICALLY A GODDESS. SHE'S PERFECT. In book one, though...she's just Kaz's annoying sidekick with barely any personality of her own, just present to inevitably end up as his love interest (thank God that didn't happen right away, I'd have sued). Also...unsurprisingly...with a tragic backstory. Okay, I didn't care much for the backstory in book one, but OH. MY. GOD. It hit me like a big yellow school bus approximately halfway thorough second one. I want to murder everyone who's ever laid a finger on Inej. I was SO happy when she set out to serve herself justice. Iconic.)

I loved Nina. (I still do. That's all.)

I liked Jesper, although both he and Nina desperately needed more chapters in this book.

I was indifferent toward Matthias. (He grew on me a little more in the second book.)

Wylan...ehhhhh. I don't know. He was just...there, but I still kind of liked him? His arc (by which I mean plot arc, his character arc was virtually non-existent) and relationship with his dad was heartbreaking. Also...JesperxWylan forever. I was practically starved for their scenes throughout this book.

(That was my take on the characters, obviously the most memorable aspect of this book. I'll be addressing everything remaining in listless one- or two- liners because I honestly can't bring myself to care as much about them in comparison. I apologize in advance.)

ANYWAY. The plot was...eh. I didn't care much for it at first, although I was suddenly, inexplicably invested when things picked up pace during the last third.

I loathed the writing. It just...dragged on and on and on. Which made everything so much more unbearable when I was already on the verge of ditching it and then spending the rest of my existence stuck with a bitter, very severe case of FOMO. Because evidently, y'all will never stop raving about this book. (Again, justified. Crooked Kingdom was - is - truly a masterpiece.)

Bardugo definitely put a lot of thought and planning into the setting and politics of her world, and it shows. But...I'd never want to live there. It isn't your usual idealistic kind of fantasy world (the kind that, y'know, you usually read fantasy for. It destroys the point of "fantastical escapism" and should never have been marketed as one, but for what it's worth, it was still SO BRILLIANTLY DEVELOPED objectively speaking). I'd rather die, actually *shudders*. I'm a big softie.

The whole "jurda parem" concept and how it affected the economy of the world was SO PERFECTLY PLOTTED. AHHHHH. Leigh Bardugo's brain, I swear. This book is worth reading just for that.

This book was also incredibly diverse and the diversity was actually pretty well-done.

And...oh, yep. THE JOOST CHAPTER. WHY. WHY. WHY. WHY TF WAS IT NECESSARY. I kept putting this book off because I couldn't make it through the cursed prologue. And this is a trend the author follows with all her books, as far as I can tell. WHY WOULD YOU WRITE A DREARY, 15-PAGE LONG PROLOGUE THAT DOESN'T AFFECT THE REST OF YOUR STORY IN ANY DAMN WAY?! Literally, it was just SO POINTLESS. My advice to the 2 or so people who still haven't read this book: if you're intending to plough through...skip the prologue. You won't regret it.

Also...the world was kinda confusing to me at first, mostly 'cause I've never read Shadow And Bone (the trilogy preceding this one - where you're originally introduced to this world - for all you noobs out there - also ahhhhh that just felt so good to type out). Since most of the world-building was done there, we had to plunge right into this book with no kind of parachute or safety net.

Would I recommend the experience?

SPOILER ALERT (not really): it was BAFFLING AND OVERWHELMING AS HELL (but also kinda refreshingly cool, tbh). I had to skim the Wiki page before reading the book, which actually really helped! 10/10 experience, highly recommended to anyone (like me) wary of the first trilogy because of the terrible reviews and/or because you're reading this one solely because of peer pressure and aren't interested in forcing yourself through three other fat books you aren't particularly interested in. Unless you end up falling hard for this one, of course (which, not gonna lie, you probably will...IF you make it to the end).

That's all. I don't know if I'd recommend this to anyone, or advise them to head straight to book the second instead (no, that'd be too confusing). I just...don't know. I suck at life advice.

But fair warning: it is a bit of a - no, a huge, EPIC snoozefest at first. If you really think you have it in you to force yourself through 200 bland pages to get to the good stuff, though...

*shrugs*

------
3.5 stars. The ending (the last third of the book) was AMAZING, but it took (a lot of) time to pick up the pace.
------
hello vaguest and most obscure corner of the internet aka probably nobody,

it's close to midnight, I don't want to sleep and really feel like I need to get some kind of writing in some shape or form done to stop myself from going crazy (as part of my goal to write a little every day, even if I'm kind of cheating because this obviously doesn't count). I'll be up writing these reviews for a while. even if the concerned books have been reviewed a thousand times already and I'm probably writing his into the void, thus defeating the purpose of this site.
(okay, it's mostly because I started blogging recently and feel like I should be writing a post right now but don't feel like writing anything I'll need to edit later. hopefully if I ever need to recommend/rant about this to a friend or on my blog (optimistically assuming I continue with it), it'll come in use. and it'll make it easier to sort through crap if I'm looking back, I guess.

I'll be picking these out of my "read" shelf randomly so who knows what long-forgotten nuggets i'll be finding!

(also, yes, I'll be copy-pasting this onto every book that I'll be reviewing as part of this "project", even if it's longer than some of the reviews themselves. whopee.)

~me
------
My Blog:
]]> 17378508
Blue Sargent has found things. For the first time in her life, she has friends she can trust, a group to which she can belong. The Raven Boys have taken her in as one of their own. Their problems have become hers, and her problems have become theirs.

The trick with found things, though, is how easily they can be lost.

Friends can betray.
Mothers can disappear.
Visions can mislead.
Certainties can unravel.]]> 391 Maggie Stiefvater 0545424968 kavya 4 4.26 2014
author: Maggie Stiefvater
name: kavya
average rating: 4.26
book published: 2014
rating: 4
read at: 2020/02/29
date added: 2022/06/23
shelves: fantasy, multiple-pov, achillean
review:

]]> 53239539 Fall in love all over again with the characters from the bestselling Simonverse novels in this highly anticipated epilogue novella. Perfect for fans of Becky Albertalli, the movie Love, Simon, and the new Hulu series spin-off, Love, Victor!

It’s been more than a year since Simon and Blue turned their anonymous online flirtation into an IRL relationship, and just a few months since Abby and Leah’s unforgettable night at senior prom.

Now the Creekwood High crew are first years at different colleges, navigating friendship and romance the way their story began—on email.]]> 128 Becky Albertalli 0063048140 kavya 5 3.61 2020
author: Becky Albertalli
name: kavya
average rating: 3.61
book published: 2020
rating: 5
read at: 2020/07/01
date added: 2022/06/23
shelves: teen-realistic-fic, multiple-pov, romance, queer-fam, friendship-focus, achillean
review:

]]> 32768522
That's what his roommate, Baz, says. And Baz might be evil and a vampire and a complete git, but he's probably right.

Half the time, Simon can't even make his wand work, and the other half, he starts something on fire. His mentor's avoiding him, his girlfriend broke up with him, and there's a magic-eating monster running around, wearing Simon's face. Baz would be having a field day with all this, if he were here � it's their last year at the Watford School of Magicks, and Simon's infuriating nemesis didn't even bother to show up.

Carry On - The Rise and Fall of Simon Snow is a ghost story, a love story and a mystery. It has just as much kissing and talking as you'd expect from a Rainbow Rowell story - but far, far more monsters.]]> 522 Rainbow Rowell 1250135028 kavya 4 4.5 stars. 4.17 2015
author: Rainbow Rowell
name: kavya
average rating: 4.17
book published: 2015
rating: 4
read at: 2019/09/03
date added: 2022/06/23
shelves: fantasy, multiple-pov, omg-they-were-roommates, achillean
review:
4.5 stars.
]]> 26240663 Seven students. Seven (deadly) sins. One secret.

Paloma High School is ordinary by anyone’s standards. It’s got the same cliques, the same prejudices, the same suspect cafeteria food. And like every high school, every student has something to hide—from Kat, the thespian who conceals her trust issues onstage, to Valentine, the neurotic genius who’s planted the seed of a school scandal.

When that scandal bubbles over, and rumors of a teacher-student affair surface, everyone starts hunting for someone to blame. For the seven unlikely allies at the heart of it all, the collision of their seven ordinary-seeming lives results in extraordinary change.]]> 343 Riley Redgate 1419719440 kavya 5 I expected this to be a light, Pretty Little Liars-esque read, but it was SO much more than that. I loved most of the characters, and although some characters mildly annoyed me at some points, it was only because I related to them in ways I didn't want to (Kat, and...yep, Claire. She's one of the most realistic characters I've ever read about, but she was so jealous, insecure and judgemental all the time...). It was perfect, and poignant, and powerful.
Matt, Lucas, Valentine, Kat and Olivia are some of my favourite characters of all time. Their voices were all unique, distinct and pitch perfect. The only thing I didn't like about this book was Juniper. For one thing, her chapters were short, confusing and written in verse, and she was also the character with the least depth among the seven. Overall, though, this was one of the best books I've read this year!
(I also really loved the feminist aspect to the whole thing. You go, Olivia!)]]> 3.79 2016
author: Riley Redgate
name: kavya
average rating: 3.79
book published: 2016
rating: 5
read at: 2019/07/02
date added: 2022/06/23
shelves: teen-realistic-fic, multiple-pov, aspec, reviewed-with-success, achillean
review:
Wow. Just...whoa.
I expected this to be a light, Pretty Little Liars-esque read, but it was SO much more than that. I loved most of the characters, and although some characters mildly annoyed me at some points, it was only because I related to them in ways I didn't want to (Kat, and...yep, Claire. She's one of the most realistic characters I've ever read about, but she was so jealous, insecure and judgemental all the time...). It was perfect, and poignant, and powerful.
Matt, Lucas, Valentine, Kat and Olivia are some of my favourite characters of all time. Their voices were all unique, distinct and pitch perfect. The only thing I didn't like about this book was Juniper. For one thing, her chapters were short, confusing and written in verse, and she was also the character with the least depth among the seven. Overall, though, this was one of the best books I've read this year!
(I also really loved the feminist aspect to the whole thing. You go, Olivia!)
]]> 31332356
From hiking trips, to four-person birthday parties, to never-ending group texts, Jess, Lee, Ryan, and Nora have always been inseparable—and unstoppable. But now, with senior year on the horizon, they’ve been splintering off and growing apart. And so, as always, Jess makes a plan.

Reinstating their usual tradition of making resolutions together on New Year’s Eve, Jess adds a new twist: instead of making their own resolutions, the four friends assign them for each other—dares like kiss someone you know is wrong for you, show your paintings, learn Spanish, say yes to everything.

But not even the best laid plans can take into account the uncertainties of life. As the year unfolds, Jess, Ryan, Nora, and Lee each test the bonds that hold them together. And amid first loves, heart breaks, and life-changing decisions, beginning again is never as simple as it seems.]]> 416 Mia Garcia 0062656821 kavya 4 3.61 2018
author: Mia Garcia
name: kavya
average rating: 3.61
book published: 2018
rating: 4
read at: 2021/03/24
date added: 2022/06/23
shelves: teen-realistic-fic, multiple-pov, my-dearly-beloveds, friendship-focus, queer-fam, sapphic, achillean
review:
kfjdhsgkhdjkgh this was...exactly as good as you'd expect a book about a latinx queer found family witha fixation on food and friendships and all things life is worth living for to be. except better. also jess and nora are me oops
]]> 25689074
CONTENTS
The Keeper: A prequel to the Lunar Chronicles, showing a young Scarlet and how Princess Selene came into the care of Michelle Benoit.
Glitches: In this prequel to Cinder, we see the results of the plague play out, and the emotional toll it takes on Cinder. Something that may, or may not, be a glitch�.
The Queen’s Army: In this prequel to Scarlet, we’re introduced to the army Queen Levana is building, and one soldier in particular who will do anything to keep from becoming the monster they want him to be.
Carswell’s Guide to Being Lucky: Thirteen-year-old Carswell Thorne has big plans involving a Rampion spaceship and a no-return trip out of Los Angeles.
After Sunshine Passes By: In this prequel to Cress, we see how a nine-year-old Cress ended up alone on a satellite, spying on Earth for Luna.
The Princess and the Guard: In this prequel to Winter, we see a young Winter and Jacin playing a game called the Princess and the Guard�
The Little Android: A retelling of Hans Christian Andersen’s “The Little Mermaid,� set in the world of The Lunar Chronicles.
The Mechanic: In this prequel to Cinder, we see Kai and Cinder’s first meeting from Kai’s perspective.
Something Old, Something New: In this epilogue to Winter, friends gather for the wedding of the century…]]> 400 Marissa Meyer 1250091845 kavya 4 multiple-pov, fantasy 4.16 2016
author: Marissa Meyer
name: kavya
average rating: 4.16
book published: 2016
rating: 4
read at: 2019/05/06
date added: 2022/06/23
shelves: multiple-pov, fantasy
review:

]]> 9520360 PERCY IS CONFUSED. When he awoke from his long sleep, he didn't know much more than his name. His brain fuzz is lingering, even after the wolf Lupa told him he is a demigod and trained him to fight with the pen/sword in his pocket. Somehow Percy manages to make it to a camp for half-bloods, despite the fact that he has to keep killing monsters along the way. But the camp doesn't ring any bells with him. The only thing he can recall from his past is another name: Annabeth.

HAZEL IS SUPPOSED TO BE DEAD. When she lived before, she didn't do a very good job of it. Sure, she was an obedient daughter, even when her mother was possessed by greed. But that was the problem—when the Voice took over her mother and commanded Hazel to use her "gift" for an evil purpose, Hazel couldn't say no. Now because of her mistake, the future of the world is at risk. Hazel wishes she could ride away from it all on the stallion that appears in her dreams.

FRANK IS A KLUTZ. His grandmother says he is descended from heroes and can be anything he wants to be, but he doesn't see it. He doesn't even know who his father is. He keeps hoping Apollo will claim him, because the only thing he is good at is archery—although not good enough to win camp war games. His bulky physique makes him feel like an ox, especially in front of Hazel, his closest friend at camp. He trusts her completely—enough to share the secret he holds close to his heart.

Beginning at the "other" camp for half-bloods and extending as far as the land beyond the gods, this breathtaking second installment of the Heroes of Olympus series introduces new demigods, revives fearsome monsters, and features other remarkable creatures, all destined to play a part in the Prophesy of Seven.]]> 521 Rick Riordan 1423140591 kavya 3 4.41 2011
author: Rick Riordan
name: kavya
average rating: 4.41
book published: 2011
rating: 3
read at: 2016/01/01
date added: 2022/06/14
shelves: fantasy, middle-grade, multiple-pov
review:

]]> 6547258 The mists rule the night...
The lord ruler owns the world.

For a thousand years the ash fell.
For a thousand years, the Skaa slaved in misery and lived in fear. For a thousand years, the Lord Ruler reigned with absolute power and ultimate terror, divinely invincible. Every attempted revolt has failed miserably.

Yet somehow hope survives.
A new kind of uprising is being planned, one that depends on the cunning of a brilliant criminal mastermind and the courage of an unlikely heroine, a Skaa street urchin, who must learn to master Allomancy, the power of a mistborn.

What if the prophesied hero had failed to defeat the Dark Lord? The answer will be found in the Mistborn trilogy, a saga of surprises that begins here.]]> 647 Brandon Sanderson kavya 4 fantasy, multiple-pov 4.52 2006
author: Brandon Sanderson
name: kavya
average rating: 4.52
book published: 2006
rating: 4
read at: 2020/02/25
date added: 2022/03/30
shelves: fantasy, multiple-pov
review:

]]> 48727813 Two-time British Fantasy Award Winner
Astounding Award Winner
Lambda Literary Award Finalist
Hugo Award Finalist
Locus Award Finalist
Otherwise Award Finalist

"Magnificent in every way."—Samantha Shannon, author of The Priory of the Orange Tree

"A dazzling new world of fate, war, love and betrayal."—Zen Cho, author of Black Water Sister

She Who Became the Sun reimagines the rise to power of the Ming Dynasty’s founding emperor.

To possess the Mandate of Heaven, the female monk Zhu will do anything

“I refuse to be nothing…�

In a famine-stricken village on a dusty yellow plain, two children are given two fates. A boy, greatness. A girl, nothingness�

In 1345, China lies under harsh Mongol rule. For the starving peasants of the Central Plains, greatness is something found only in stories. When the Zhu family’s eighth-born son, Zhu Chongba, is given a fate of greatness, everyone is mystified as to how it will come to pass. The fate of nothingness received by the family’s clever and capable second daughter, on the other hand, is only as expected.

When a bandit attack orphans the two children, though, it is Zhu Chongba who succumbs to despair and dies. Desperate to escape her own fated death, the girl uses her brother's identity to enter a monastery as a young male novice. There, propelled by her burning desire to survive, Zhu learns she is capable of doing whatever it takes, no matter how callous, to stay hidden from her fate.

After her sanctuary is destroyed for supporting the rebellion against Mongol rule, Zhu takes the chance to claim another future her brother's abandoned greatness.

At the Publisher's request, this title is being sold without Digital Rights Management Software (DRM) applied.]]> 416 Shelley Parker-Chan 1250621798 kavya 5 3.87 2021
author: Shelley Parker-Chan
name: kavya
average rating: 3.87
book published: 2021
rating: 5
read at: 2022/02/16
date added: 2022/02/16
shelves: fantasy, multiple-pov, retellings, sapphic, trans, my-dearly-beloveds, audiobooks
review:
okay so it admittedly took me a while to actually get into this BUT THIS WAS EVERYTHING I LOVE IT WITH MY WHOLE HEART AND CANNOT RECOMMEND IT ENOUGH
]]> 52411049 A gripping, dark enemies-to-lovers LGBTQ+ YA fantasy about two girls who must choose between saving themselves, each other, or their sinking island home.

Every year on St. Walpurga's Eve, Caldella’s Witch Queen lures a boy back to her palace. An innocent life to be sacrificed on the full moon to keep the island city from sinking.

Lina Kirk is convinced her brother is going to be taken this year. To save him, she enlists the help of Thomas Lin, the boy she secretly loves, and the only person to ever escape from the palace. But they draw the queen’s attention, and Thomas is chosen as the sacrifice.

Queen Eva watched her sister die to save the boy she loved. Now as queen, she won't make the same mistake. She's willing to sacrifice anyone if it means saving herself and her city.

When Lina offers herself to the queen in exchange for Thomas’s freedom, the two girls await the full moon together. But Lina is not at all what Eva expected, and the queen is nothing like Lina envisioned. Against their will, they find themselves falling for each other as water floods Caldella’s streets and the dark tide demands its sacrifice.]]> 336 Alicia Jasinska 1728209986 kavya 3 3.43 2020
author: Alicia Jasinska
name: kavya
average rating: 3.43
book published: 2020
rating: 3
read at: 2022/02/13
date added: 2022/02/13
shelves: fantasy, sapphic, romance, dark-academia, multiple-pov
review:

]]> 57803151 In this compelling and thought-provoking debut novel, after a terrorist attack rocks the country and anti-Islamic sentiment stirs, three Black Muslim girls create a space where they can shatter assumptions and share truths.

Sabriya has her whole summer planned out in color-coded glory, but those plans go out the window after a terrorist attack near her home. When the terrorist is assumed to be Muslim and Islamophobia grows, Sabriya turns to her online journal for comfort. You Truly Assumed was never meant to be anything more than an outlet, but the blog goes viral as fellow Muslim teens around the country flock to it and find solace and a sense of community.

Soon two more teens, Zakat and Farah, join Bri to run You Truly Assumed and the three quickly form a strong friendship. But as the blog’s popularity grows, so do the pushback and hateful comments. When one of them is threatened, the search to find out who is behind it all begins, and their friendship is put to the test when all three must decide whether to shut down the blog and lose what they’ve worked for…or take a stand and risk everything to make their voices heard.]]> 352 Laila Sabreen 1335418652 kavya 4 3.78 2022
author: Laila Sabreen
name: kavya
average rating: 3.78
book published: 2022
rating: 4
read at: 2022/02/02
date added: 2022/02/02
shelves: teen-realistic-fic, 2022, audiobooks, arcs, multiple-pov, online-love, reviewed-with-success
review:

]]> 40874032 A masterful tale of ambition, jealousy, desire, and superpowers.

Victor and Eli started out as college roommates—brilliant, arrogant, lonely boys who recognized the same sharpness and ambition in each other. In their senior year, a shared research interest in adrenaline, near-death experiences, and seemingly supernatural events reveals an intriguing possibility: that under the right conditions, someone could develop extraordinary abilities. But when their thesis moves from the academic to the experimental, things go horribly wrong.

Ten years later, Victor breaks out of prison, determined to catch up to his old friend (now foe), aided by a young girl whose reserved nature obscures a stunning ability. Meanwhile, Eli is on a mission to eradicate every other super-powered person that he can find—aside from his sidekick, an enigmatic woman with an unbreakable will. Armed with terrible power on both sides, driven by the memory of betrayal and loss, the archnemeses have set a course for revenge—but who will be left alive at the end?

In Vicious, V. E. Schwab brings to life a gritty comic-book-style world in vivid prose: a world where gaining superpowers doesn't automatically lead to heroism, and a time when allegiances are called into question.]]> 402 Victoria E. Schwab kavya 5 4.17 2013
author: Victoria E. Schwab
name: kavya
average rating: 4.17
book published: 2013
rating: 5
read at: 2019/11/23
date added: 2022/01/24
shelves: multiple-pov, non-traditional-writing-format, aspec, mystery-thriller
review:

]]> 46223286 A story of mock trial, feminism, and the inherent power found in a pair of knitting needles.

Raina Petree is crushing her senior year, until her boyfriend dumps her, the drama club (basically) dumps her, the college of her dreams slips away, and her arch-nemesis triumphs.

Things aren’t much better for Millie Goodwin. Her father treats her like a servant, and the all-boy Mock Trial team votes her out, even after she spent the last three years helping to build its success.

But then, an advice columnist unexpectedly helps Raina find new purpose in a pair of knitting needles and a politically active local yarn store. This leads to an unlikely meeting in the girls� bathroom, where Raina inspires Millie to start a rival team. The two join together and recruit four other angry girls to not only take on Mock Trial, but to smash the patriarchy in the process.]]> 272 Adrienne Kisner 125025342X kavya 5 3.80 2020
author: Adrienne Kisner
name: kavya
average rating: 3.80
book published: 2020
rating: 5
read at: 2020/10/24
date added: 2022/01/24
shelves: my-dearly-beloveds, aspec, competition, friendship-focus, multiple-pov, queer-fam, sapphic, trans
review:

]]> 14866
Sterling is a small, ordinary New Hampshire town where nothing ever happens -- until the day its complacency is shattered by a shocking act of violence. In the aftermath, the town's residents must not only seek justice in order to begin healing but also come to terms with the role they played in the tragedy. For them, the lines between truth and fiction, right and wrong, insider and outsider have been obscured forever. Josie Cormier, the teenage daughter of the judge sitting on the case, could be the state's best witness, but she can't remember what happened in front of her own eyes. And as the trial progresses, fault lines between the high school and the adult community begin to show, destroying the closest of friendships and families.

Nineteen Minutes is New York Times bestselling author Jodi Picoult's most raw, honest, and important novel yet. Told with the straightforward style for which she has become known, it asks simple questions that have no easy answers: Can your own child become a mystery to you? What does it mean to be different in our society? Is it ever okay for a victim to strike back? And who -- if anyone -- has the right to judge someone else?]]> 440 Jodi Picoult 0743496728 kavya 4 4.16 2007
author: Jodi Picoult
name: kavya
average rating: 4.16
book published: 2007
rating: 4
read at:
date added: 2022/01/24
shelves: teen-realistic-fic, multiple-pov, mentit-illness
review:

]]> 34236194
Emma Blue spends her time perfecting the computer game she built from scratch, rather than facing her parents� crumbling marriage. She can solve any problem with the right code, but when an online troll’s harassment escalates, she’s truly afraid.

When Rev and Emma meet, they both long to lift the burden of their secrets and bond instantly over their shared turmoil. But when their situations turn dangerous, their trust in each other will be tested in ways they never expected. This must-read story will once again have readers falling for Brigid Kemmerer’s emotional storytelling.

*While this book exists in the same universe as Letters to the Lost, it is a standalone title.*]]> 410 Brigid Kemmerer 1681190141 kavya 5 4.24 2018
author: Brigid Kemmerer
name: kavya
average rating: 4.24
book published: 2018
rating: 5
read at: 2019/06/08
date added: 2022/01/24
shelves: audiobooks, teen-realistic-fic, multiple-pov, romance, mentit-illness, online-love
review:

]]> 162085
Spencer covets her sister's boyfriend. Aria's fantasizing about her English teacher. Emily's crushing on the new girl at school. Hanna uses some ugly tricks to stay beautiful. But they've all kept an even bigger secret since their friend Alison vanished.

How do I know? Because I know everything about the bad girls they were, the naughty girls they are, and the dirty secrets they've kept. And guess what? I'm telling.]]> 286 Sara Shepard 0060887303 kavya 3 3.86 2006
author: Sara Shepard
name: kavya
average rating: 3.86
book published: 2006
rating: 3
read at: 2018/01/01
date added: 2022/01/24
shelves: multiple-pov, mystery-thriller, friendship-focus
review:

]]> 29844228 You can’t stop the future.
You can’t rewind the past.
The only way to learn the secret . . . is to press play.

Clay Jensen returns home from school to find a strange package with his name on it lying on his porch. Inside he discovers several cassette tapes recorded by Hannah Baker–his classmate and crush–who committed suicide two weeks earlier. Hannah’s voice tells him that there are thirteen reasons why she decided to end her life. Clay is one of them. If he listens, he’ll find out why.

Clay spends the night crisscrossing his town with Hannah as his guide. He becomes a firsthand witness to Hannah’s pain, and as he follows Hannah’s recorded words throughout his town, what he discovers changes his life forever.]]> 352 Jay Asher 1595147888 kavya 3 3.71 2007
author: Jay Asher
name: kavya
average rating: 3.71
book published: 2007
rating: 3
read at: 2018/01/01
date added: 2022/01/24
shelves: multiple-pov, non-traditional-writing-format, mentit-illness
review:

]]> 28245707 Three friends, two love stories, one convention: this fun, feminist love letter to geek culture is all about fandom, friendship, and finding the courage to be yourself.

Charlie likes to stand out. She’s a vlogger and actress promoting her first movie at SupaCon, and this is her chance to show fans she’s over her public breakup with co-star Reese Ryan. When internet-famous cool-girl actress Alyssa Huntington arrives as a surprise guest, it seems Charlie’s long-time crush on her isn’t as one-sided as she thought.

Taylor likes to blend in. Her brain is wired differently, making her fear change. And there’s one thing in her life she knows will never change: her friendship with her best guy friend Jamie—no matter how much she may secretly want it to. But when she hears about a fan contest for her favorite fandom, she starts to rethink her rules on playing it safe.

Queens of Geek by Jen Wilde, chosen by readers like you for Macmillan's young adult imprint Swoon Reads, is an empowering novel for anyone who has ever felt that fandom is family.
]]> 262 Jen Wilde 1250111390 kavya 4 3.78 2017
author: Jen Wilde
name: kavya
average rating: 3.78
book published: 2017
rating: 4
read at: 2019/12/23
date added: 2022/01/24
shelves: multiple-pov, romance, mentit-illness, sapphic
review:

]]> 22719283 Daylight Falls ... opposite Vanessa Park, the one actor immune to his charms. (Not that he's trying to charm her, of course.) Meanwhile, his drama-queen mother blackmails him into a new family reality TV show, with Josh in the starring role. Now that he's in the spotlight—on everyone's terms but his own—Josh has to decide whether a life as a superstar is the one he really wants.

Vanessa Park has always been certain about her path as an actor, despite her parents' disapproval. But with all her relationships currently in upheaval, she's painfully uncertain about everything else. When she meets her new career handler, Brianna, Van is relieved to have found someone she can rely on, now that her BFF, Ally, is at college across the country. But as feelings unexpectedly evolve beyond friendship, Van's life reaches a whole new level of confusing. And she'll have to choose between the one thing she's always loved ... and the person she never imagined she could.]]> 279 Dahlia Adler 1633920178 kavya 4 4.5 stars! 3.72 2015
author: Dahlia Adler
name: kavya
average rating: 3.72
book published: 2015
rating: 4
read at: 2020/09/27
date added: 2021/12/30
shelves: multiple-pov, romance, sapphic
review:
4.5 stars!
]]> 52516332 In a novel-in-verse that brims with grief and love, National Book Award-winning and New York Times bestselling author Elizabeth Acevedo writes about the devastation of loss, the difficulty of forgiveness, and the bittersweet bonds that shape our lives.

Camino Rios lives for the summers when her father visits her in the Dominican Republic. But this time, on the day when his plane is supposed to land, Camino arrives at the airport to see crowds of crying people�

In New York City, Yahaira Rios is called to the principal’s office, where her mother is waiting to tell her that her father, her hero, has died in a plane crash.

Separated by distance—and Papi’s secrets—the two girls are forced to face a new reality in which their father is dead and their lives are forever altered.

And then, when it seems like they’ve lost everything of their father, they learn of each other.]]> 432 Elizabeth Acevedo 0062882767 kavya 4 4.22 2020
author: Elizabeth Acevedo
name: kavya
average rating: 4.22
book published: 2020
rating: 4
read at: 2020/11/03
date added: 2021/12/30
shelves: non-traditional-writing-format, multiple-pov, teen-realistic-fic, sapphic, in-verse
review:

]]> 50266871
Despite their mutually beneficial pact, they start developing real feelings for each other. But relationships are complicated, and some people will do anything to stop two Bengali girls from achieving happily ever after.]]> 352 Adiba Jaigirdar kavya 5 4.08 2021
author: Adiba Jaigirdar
name: kavya
average rating: 4.08
book published: 2021
rating: 5
read at: 2021/05/30
date added: 2021/12/30
shelves: teen-realistic-fic, multiple-pov, romance, my-dearly-beloveds, sapphic, fav-sapphic-romances
review:
SKJSFHDKJGHJ I HAVE NO WORDS SHE BROKE ME AGAIN
]]> 13206828
Their best hope lies with Cress, a girl imprisoned on a satellite since childhood who's only ever had her netscreens as company. All that screen time has made Cress an excellent hacker. Unfortunately, she's just received orders from Levana to track down Cinder and her handsome accomplice.

When a daring rescue of Cress goes awry, the group is separated. Cress finally has her freedom, but it comes at a higher price. Meanwhile, Queen Levana will let nothing prevent her marriage to Emperor Kai. Cress, Scarlet, and Cinder may not have signed up to save the world, but they may be the only hope the world has.]]> 552 Marissa Meyer 0312642970 kavya 5 4.40 2014
author: Marissa Meyer
name: kavya
average rating: 4.40
book published: 2014
rating: 5
read at: 2019/02/04
date added: 2021/09/08
shelves: fantasy, multiple-pov, my-dearly-beloveds
review:

]]> 34128369 THE #1 NEW YORK TIMES AND INTERNATIONAL BESTSELLER
**SOON TO BE A NETFLIX ORIGINAL SERIES**

"Eerie, beautiful, and devastating." -- Chicago Tribune

"A stealthy hit with staying power. . . . thriller-like pacing." -- The New York Times

"Thirteen Reasons Why will leave you with chills long after you have finished reading." --Amber Gibson, NPR's "All Things Considered"

You can't stop the future.
You can't rewind the past.
The only way to learn the secret . . . is to press play.

Clay Jensen returns home from school to find a strange package with his name on it lying on his porch. Inside he discovers several cassette tapes recorded by Hannah Baker--his classmate and crush--who committed suicide two weeks earlier. Hannah's voice tells him that there are thirteen reasons why she decided to end her life. Clay is one of them. If he listens, he'll find out why.
Clay spends the night crisscrossing his town with Hannah as his guide. He becomes a firsthand witness to Hannah's pain, and as he follows Hannah's recorded words throughout his town, what he discovers changes his life forever.]]> 288 Jay Asher 0451478290 kavya 3
decided to reread this now that I'm in a pretty good place mentally to see how it'd affect my perception, and...I definitely had a better experience than the last time lol

I still don't think I can rate this higher than three stars though.

important disclaimer: please, please do not read this book if you have depression or think you're even mildly vulnerable to suicide ideation. it did not do good things to me when I did and yes, experiences vary, but it...isn't an ideal book for that audience. this book was revolutionary in starting up so many conversations, especially in the mid-2000s, and it was a fantastic, heartfelt attempt that guided thousands of neurotypical teenagers to a more empathetic, open-minded perspective for its time. however...there are better books to pick up if you're actually in the said position. trust me.

- this book is phenomenal when read as a dramatic thriller or something. the writing is some of the most addictive I've read, the pacing is perfect, it makes for a great recreational read tbh. Asher seamlessly switches perspectives and it only makes the prose more engaging.

- this book is not the tv show. please do not endorse that mess.

- yet, it fails to address a lot of what the tv show did. I understand where she was coming from, but for hannah to essentially ruin these thirteen lives when half the "culprits" were nothing more than insecure or conflicted teenagers was...uhm. not great. this could've potentially to probably led to permanent mental and emotional damage, a lifelong burden and even copycat suicides for those involved. that was handled really callously.

- the romanticization of suicide as some sort of twisted revenge fantasy is a whole other mess. it was...not a good message to send but that's been discussed enough and I hope we can all agree that was a damaging narrative

- this book is great for educating neurotypical kids but doesn't offer any solace to actually depressed kids. or even affirm hannah's depression on page. instead, it sends a message that asking for help is futile and pointless and addressing your critical mental health will only backfire on you. I understand why Mr. Porter was written to do what he did, but it's a fairly disturbing message to send to a depressed teen audience.

- I haven't seen too many reviews mentioning this but I really appreciated how ahead of his time Jay Asher was regarding his treatment of women's issues, slut-shaming, sex positivity, et cetera. this book was published in the 2000s, when it was the norm for even women to hate women (yeah I was kinda tiny then but my favourite band dedicated their breakthrough bop to slut-shaming a competing love interest in 2007 and it was one of the top pop-punk hits of the year, so...I have a pretty good idea). for this male author to dedicate a significant portion of his book to largely female issues, dissect them impartially, refrain from slut-shaming anybody, detailing the impact it had on his protagonist and even acknowledging that even his seemingly perfect male protagonist wasn't immune to the prevalent culture of toxic masculinity was so refreshing. that said, literary rape is a whole other ball game and I don't know how I feel about that.

- some of the tapes felt kinda lazily written and unnecessary? callous driving? really? it's an important issue but it doesn't really add to the story imo

- hannah was a really well-written character. she was flawed and real and so fucking perfect.
- it touches on so many beautiful concepts and really offers food for thought, especially if you haven't been exposed to such discussions first hand.

tl;dr a revolutionary, bold and surprisingly feminist piece for its time, but its take on mental illness and suicide was kind of extremely messy? it offers a lot of food for thought and makes for an unexpectedly addictive and even occasionally cathartic read, though. depending on who you are this could either make for a perfect, engaging and life-altering read or wreck you:/

(I will say that if this were written today I'd hate it from the bottom of my heart though)]]> 3.57 2007
author: Jay Asher
name: kavya
average rating: 3.57
book published: 2007
rating: 3
read at: 2020/10/18
date added: 2021/05/31
shelves: multiple-pov, non-traditional-writing-format, reviewed-with-success
review:
somanymixedfeelingsuhghhhh

decided to reread this now that I'm in a pretty good place mentally to see how it'd affect my perception, and...I definitely had a better experience than the last time lol

I still don't think I can rate this higher than three stars though.

important disclaimer: please, please do not read this book if you have depression or think you're even mildly vulnerable to suicide ideation. it did not do good things to me when I did and yes, experiences vary, but it...isn't an ideal book for that audience. this book was revolutionary in starting up so many conversations, especially in the mid-2000s, and it was a fantastic, heartfelt attempt that guided thousands of neurotypical teenagers to a more empathetic, open-minded perspective for its time. however...there are better books to pick up if you're actually in the said position. trust me.

- this book is phenomenal when read as a dramatic thriller or something. the writing is some of the most addictive I've read, the pacing is perfect, it makes for a great recreational read tbh. Asher seamlessly switches perspectives and it only makes the prose more engaging.

- this book is not the tv show. please do not endorse that mess.

- yet, it fails to address a lot of what the tv show did. I understand where she was coming from, but for hannah to essentially ruin these thirteen lives when half the "culprits" were nothing more than insecure or conflicted teenagers was...uhm. not great. this could've potentially to probably led to permanent mental and emotional damage, a lifelong burden and even copycat suicides for those involved. that was handled really callously.

- the romanticization of suicide as some sort of twisted revenge fantasy is a whole other mess. it was...not a good message to send but that's been discussed enough and I hope we can all agree that was a damaging narrative

- this book is great for educating neurotypical kids but doesn't offer any solace to actually depressed kids. or even affirm hannah's depression on page. instead, it sends a message that asking for help is futile and pointless and addressing your critical mental health will only backfire on you. I understand why Mr. Porter was written to do what he did, but it's a fairly disturbing message to send to a depressed teen audience.

- I haven't seen too many reviews mentioning this but I really appreciated how ahead of his time Jay Asher was regarding his treatment of women's issues, slut-shaming, sex positivity, et cetera. this book was published in the 2000s, when it was the norm for even women to hate women (yeah I was kinda tiny then but my favourite band dedicated their breakthrough bop to slut-shaming a competing love interest in 2007 and it was one of the top pop-punk hits of the year, so...I have a pretty good idea). for this male author to dedicate a significant portion of his book to largely female issues, dissect them impartially, refrain from slut-shaming anybody, detailing the impact it had on his protagonist and even acknowledging that even his seemingly perfect male protagonist wasn't immune to the prevalent culture of toxic masculinity was so refreshing. that said, literary rape is a whole other ball game and I don't know how I feel about that.

- some of the tapes felt kinda lazily written and unnecessary? callous driving? really? it's an important issue but it doesn't really add to the story imo

- hannah was a really well-written character. she was flawed and real and so fucking perfect.
- it touches on so many beautiful concepts and really offers food for thought, especially if you haven't been exposed to such discussions first hand.

tl;dr a revolutionary, bold and surprisingly feminist piece for its time, but its take on mental illness and suicide was kind of extremely messy? it offers a lot of food for thought and makes for an unexpectedly addictive and even occasionally cathartic read, though. depending on who you are this could either make for a perfect, engaging and life-altering read or wreck you:/

(I will say that if this were written today I'd hate it from the bottom of my heart though)
]]> 17675462 “There are only two reasons a non-seer would see a spirit on St. Mark’s Eve,� Neeve said. “Either you’re his true love . . . or you killed him.�

It is freezing in the churchyard, even before the dead arrive.

Every year, Blue Sargent stands next to her clairvoyant mother as the soon-to-be dead walk past. Blue herself never sees them—not until this year, when a boy emerges from the dark and speaks directly to her.

His name is Gansey, and Blue soon discovers that he is a rich student at Aglionby, the local private school. Blue has a policy of staying away from Aglionby boys. Known as Raven Boys, they can only mean trouble.

But Blue is drawn to Gansey, in a way she can’t entirely explain. He has it all—family money, good looks, devoted friends—but he’s looking for much more than that. He is on a quest that has encompassed three other Raven Boys: Adam, the scholarship student who resents all the privilege around him; Ronan, the fierce soul who ranges from anger to despair; and Noah, the taciturn watcher of the four, who notices many things but says very little.

For as long as she can remember, Blue has been warned that she will cause her true love to die. She never thought this would be a problem. But now, as her life becomes caught up in the strange and sinister world of the Raven Boys, she’s not so sure anymore.]]> 409 Maggie Stiefvater 0545424925 kavya 3 3.5 stars. 4.05 2012
author: Maggie Stiefvater
name: kavya
average rating: 4.05
book published: 2012
rating: 3
read at: 2019/10/21
date added: 2020/10/29
shelves: fantasy, middle-grade, multiple-pov
review:
3.5 stars.
]]> 17347389 439 Maggie Stiefvater 0545424941 kavya 1 fantasy, multiple-pov 4.22 2013
author: Maggie Stiefvater
name: kavya
average rating: 4.22
book published: 2013
rating: 1
read at: 2020/02/26
date added: 2020/10/29
shelves: fantasy, multiple-pov
review:

]]> 12127810 Hazel stands at a crossroads. She and the remaining crew of the Argo II could return home with the Athena Parthenos statue and try to stop Camp Half-Blood and Camp Jupiter from going to war. Or they could continue their quest to find the House of Hades, where they might be able to open the Doors of Death, rescue their friends Percy and Annabeth from Tartarus, and prevent monsters from being reincarnated in the mortal world. Whichever road they decide to take, they have to hurry, because time is running out. Gaea, the bloodthirsty Earth Mother, has set the date of August 1 for her rise to power.

Annabeth and Percy are overwhelmed. How will the two of them make it through Tartarus? Starving, thirsty, and in pain, they are barely able to stumble on in the dark and poisonous landscape that holds new horrors at every turn. They have no way of locating the Doors of Death. Even if they did, a legion of Gaea's strongest monsters guards the Doors on the Tartarus side. Annabeth and Percy can't exactly launch a frontal assault.

Despite the terrible odds, Hazel, Annabeth, Percy, and the other demigods of the prophecy know that there is only one choice: to attempt the impossible. Not just for themselves, but for everyone they love. Even though love can be the riskiest choice of all.

Join the demigods as they face their biggest challenges yet in The House of Hades, the hair-raising penultimate book in the best-selling Heroes of Olympus series.]]> 597 Rick Riordan 1423146727 kavya 4 4.56 2013
author: Rick Riordan
name: kavya
average rating: 4.56
book published: 2013
rating: 4
read at: 2016/08/01
date added: 2020/05/24
shelves: fantasy, middle-grade, multiple-pov
review:

]]> 33830437
But for Grace, an only child who was adopted at birth, discovering that she is a middle child is a different ride altogether. After putting her own baby up for adoption, she goes looking for her biological family, including�

Maya, her loudmouthed younger bio sister, who has a lot to say about their newfound family ties. Having grown up the snarky brunette in a house full of chipper redheads, she’s quick to search for traces of herself among these not-quite-strangers. And when her adopted family’s long-buried problems begin to explode to the surface, Maya can’t help but wonder where exactly it is that she belongs.

And Joaquin, their stoic older bio brother, who has no interest in bonding over their shared biological mother. After seventeen years in the foster care system, he’s learned that there are no heroes, and secrets and fears are best kept close to the vest, where they can’t hurt anyone but him.]]> 374 Robin Benway 0062330624 kavya 5 here if you’re interested for whatever reason:

(I have an annoying tendency to be extremely long-winded with basically everything I write so I’ve edited my original review into what will hopefully turn out to be something of a mini-review for your convenience - edit: whoa it's still wayyy too long lord help me please)

This book is genuinely so…wholesome. Heartwarming. Perfect. To put it simply, I adored everything about it and you absolutely need to pick this up right now, no matter what the circumstances. We good?

Uh…yeah, let’s just get to it, shall we?

Central Themes (And Other General Stuff)

This book, above all, is a brilliantly woven story of family. And friendship.
It also deals with a lot of “issues�, if you get my drift. Adolescent pregnancy, feelings of neglect as a character’s parents go through a divorce, slut-shaming, alcoholism, subtle but very damaging racism…and all of it is executed brilliantly - without being too overwhelming and remaining surprisingly PG while still packing an emotional punch. I’m serious. This is probably the first time I’ve ever cried because of a book (yes, you’re free to kill me for the blasphemy). And my favourite author is Adam Silvera.

Well…I’m exaggerating a little (obviously). My eyes may have gotten a little misty, but łŮłó˛ąłŮ’s all. Pfft. I’m tough, you guys!

(Just kidding. I’m a total crybaby.)

Anyway. Moving on.

This book is also really diverse. And none of it feels forced!

It’s just…beautiful.

The Writing

Robin Benway’s writing style is just breathtaking.

I’m actually not exaggerating here. Yes, I know łŮłó˛ąłŮ’s a first.

It’s beautiful and flowery while still somehow remaining elegant and fairly easy to read. And I have a pretty high bar for writing.

And never � NOT ONCE � does it transcend into purple prose.

I mean, there is still ONE instance of the dreaded �he let out a breath he didn’t know he’d been holding� (or some variation thereof) somewhere in the middle, but it was pretty easy to brush past.

I usually can’t stand the abundant use of metaphors in novels or just prose in general (I’m terrible at decoding subtext), but it worked amazingly well here. The author uses a whole bunch of them in every chapter, and they only enhance her writing and make the characters� emotions feel stronger and more vivid to the reader. I’m a pretty slow reader when it comes to books where the writing style is overly flowery or poetic, but I practically flew through this one! Believe me, if I’m scaring you with my descriptions…her writing isn’t hard to read. At all. This is one of the most engaging character-driven contemporaries out there, and the author’s writing style is that rare � and perfect - combination of simple and elegant.

Yes, I’m aware I sound dangerously like an annoying salesperson on one of those cringe-y commercials featuring unimaginably, unrealistically beautiful people and corny tag lines, thank you very much! Technically, I sort of am. This book does involve unimaginably beautiful characters and…well…not corny, but definitely quotable writing. Again, if you haven’t already…YOU HAVE TO PICK THIS BOOK UP.

The Characters

Ahhhhhhhhhhh.

My favourite, for some inexplicable reason, was Grace. And I say inexplicable because I loved all of these characters and wouldn’t have been able to pick a favourite under normal circumstances. I’m actually not sure why I empathized with Grace the most. I definitely related to Maya more and thought Joaquin’s character was the most layered and developed overall (not that the other two weren’t; Joaquin just had the most heartbreaking arc and the way his emotional trauma chiseled him into a paranoid, insecure person was just…suffice to say nearly every single one of Joaquin’s chapters had me on the verge of tears).

Grace. Maybe the reason I couldn’t wait to get to her chapters, the reason I was always rooting for her character, was just how much I admired her. Grace is one of those rare YA protagonists who’s just genuinely�nice. Not that she didn’t have her dramatic moments or never flared up � she did, a lot, and she totally had the right to. I can’t describe how angry I felt on her behalf throughout this book. The thing is…I love your morally grey characters as much as the next person. I do like angsty characters like Maya as well. Lately, though, I’ve just been drawn to characters like Grace a lot more. Characters who are optimistic and love people, despite the odds and despite their flaws. People who choose to care. About themselves and about everyone around them, even when they don’t have to. Grace gets pregnant, and her ex-boyfriend just pretends the whole thing never happened. His parents pin the whole thing on Grace (and they obviously break up), his friends put her through a hell of slut-shaming and he does virtually nothing to step up and defend her, and he actually gets crowned homecoming king on the night she’s delivering her baby. Any teenager who’s had to go through that much would be at least a little bitter, and in addition to this, Grace has to keep second-guessing her decision-that-wasn’t-much-of-a-decision to give up her baby (because financial issues and parental pressure and stuff). She actually punches a dude in the face in the middle of a school day at one point.

Of our three protagonists, it’s always Grace who’s pushing to unite the three of them, to find their biological parents, to get to know each other, to bond, to forgive. I think Grace is the kind of person all of us should aspire to be. It’s her decision to find her birth mom when she has to give up her baby that sets off the chain of events that is this book. Throughout the novel, she struggles with hiding her history from her siblings because she’s afraid of them being unsupportive. Her arc is real, beautiful, and heart-wrenching. And as a character, she was definitely the most instrumental to the plot.

Next - Maya! Maya was…real. I found her to be the most relatable protagonist of the three (but then again, that was for very personal reasons). Maya was often pretty hard to like or even empathize with. She’s angsty, hot-tempered, way too sarcastic and sharp-tongued for her own good, and super edgy (but for understandable reasons). She has pretty strong principles when it comes to other people, but her own life is a mess. And she’s insecure about practically everything: her identity, her family, her relationship with her girlfriend, her siblings, her mom’s alcoholism.
Reading Maya’s chapters felt like reading an old diary of mine; it took close to every ounce of self-control in me to restrain myself from screaming into the book and shaking it until I could get through to her. I adored how accurate and in-depth her representation as a young queer girl went (I know experiences vary, but this was just so well done � the passage on how her queerness affected her personality and inadvertently resulted in her developing hang-ups with displaying platonic affection openly? MY HEART). I loved how her character progressed and developed over the course of the book. In short…Maya may have been my least favourite of the three protagonists, but I would still protect her with my life. I have no complaints regarding how her character was handled.

Joaquin! Joaquin was. Um. I don’t know how to do this.

I loved Joaquin, okay?

In many ways, Joaquin reminded me of Grace. In many ways, Joaquin reminded me of Maya. But, despite all that, he was still very much a beautifully layered, well-developed character of his own. The estranged sibling, the oldest baby no one was willing to adopt. The biracial kid with darker skin tones who was shuffled between foster homes and families that obviously had no idea how to handle him throughout his childhood. And I loved the treatment of subtle racism in this book. The racism Joaquin had to endure wasn’t very direct or obvious, but deeply impacted him � for the rest of his life! � nevertheless. It wasn’t glaringly indiscreet but still managed to scar his personality and outline the pattern the rest of his life would follow for him. It made him extremely self-aware, overly paranoid and/or cynical and painfully insecure all at once.

The book explores the consequences of a bigoted society and white privilege by drawing a contrast between the lives of Grace, Maya and Joaquin. Beyond the difference in their skin tones, Joaquin is essentially the same as his two siblings as a baby. But while Grace and Maya are accepted into loving and caring families at birth, Joaquin is shunned and shunted between foster homes, taught by each individual experience to feel like he’s different for something he cannot help. The scars of emotional trauma from his childhood clearly manifest themselves into his adolescence as he’s never able to feel like he’s enough for any relationship � be it familial, platonic, romantic or otherwise. He shuts people out, engages in self-sabotaging behaviour and only attends therapy because he feels emotionally guilted into doing so by his latest set of foster parents. And he’s moulded by society to feel like his needs are always secondary. At the beginning of the book, Joaquin is defined by his race, whether he knows it or not (the text doesn’t make it obvious, but it’s pretty evident after finishing the book. No, this book does not make “everything about race�). His life would have looked dramatically different had he been or even looked whiter. By the end, however, his character’s gone through a drastic series of changes and developed wonderfully. In fact, I loved his character progression the most. And he gets a happy ending! That made me want to cry more than everything else in this emotional rollercoaster of a book put together.

The Plot

The plot for this book is obviously very character-driven and primarily focusses on the beautiful and blossoming relationships between our various protagonists. It’s everything.

Conclusion �n Final Thoughts

I loved this book to death. I wanted to make a separate section for all the beautiful relationships within its pages, but my review ended up wayyy longer than I intended it to. Suffice to say…Joaquin’s relationship with his parents was golden (totally worth reading the book for alone), Maya’s with her biological sister was just heartwarming, and even the romances were pretty well-done (I actually kinda liked them all! They weren’t revolutionary or very central to the story, but łŮłó˛ąłŮ’s pretty revolutionary for me). I also loved how perfectly it captured the alienation Grace felt from her friends after her pregnancy â€� it was obvious they were well-intentioned, but they started to get really awkward around her and didn’t know how to help. Ugh. This was just beautiful. Highly recommended.

Final Rating: One of the easiest 5/5s I’ve ever given out and wholly deserving of all the praise and awards that’ve been heaped on it over the past two years.

xx
Berry

(P.S � You can listen to the first chapter of this book on the Epic Reads YouTube channel � the narration is simply gorgeous, FYI. It’s what got me into the book, although I read the rest of it via e-book.)
<3

------

My Blog: ]]> 4.25 2017
author: Robin Benway
name: kavya
average rating: 4.25
book published: 2017
rating: 5
read at: 2020/01/18
date added: 2020/05/18
shelves: teen-realistic-fic, multiple-pov, reviewed-with-success
review:
20/04/2020 � I wrote this review back in January �20. The full, uncondensed version is up on my blog here if you’re interested for whatever reason:

(I have an annoying tendency to be extremely long-winded with basically everything I write so I’ve edited my original review into what will hopefully turn out to be something of a mini-review for your convenience - edit: whoa it's still wayyy too long lord help me please)

This book is genuinely so…wholesome. Heartwarming. Perfect. To put it simply, I adored everything about it and you absolutely need to pick this up right now, no matter what the circumstances. We good?

Uh…yeah, let’s just get to it, shall we?

Central Themes (And Other General Stuff)

This book, above all, is a brilliantly woven story of family. And friendship.
It also deals with a lot of “issues�, if you get my drift. Adolescent pregnancy, feelings of neglect as a character’s parents go through a divorce, slut-shaming, alcoholism, subtle but very damaging racism…and all of it is executed brilliantly - without being too overwhelming and remaining surprisingly PG while still packing an emotional punch. I’m serious. This is probably the first time I’ve ever cried because of a book (yes, you’re free to kill me for the blasphemy). And my favourite author is Adam Silvera.

Well…I’m exaggerating a little (obviously). My eyes may have gotten a little misty, but łŮłó˛ąłŮ’s all. Pfft. I’m tough, you guys!

(Just kidding. I’m a total crybaby.)

Anyway. Moving on.

This book is also really diverse. And none of it feels forced!

It’s just…beautiful.

The Writing

Robin Benway’s writing style is just breathtaking.

I’m actually not exaggerating here. Yes, I know łŮłó˛ąłŮ’s a first.

It’s beautiful and flowery while still somehow remaining elegant and fairly easy to read. And I have a pretty high bar for writing.

And never � NOT ONCE � does it transcend into purple prose.

I mean, there is still ONE instance of the dreaded �he let out a breath he didn’t know he’d been holding� (or some variation thereof) somewhere in the middle, but it was pretty easy to brush past.

I usually can’t stand the abundant use of metaphors in novels or just prose in general (I’m terrible at decoding subtext), but it worked amazingly well here. The author uses a whole bunch of them in every chapter, and they only enhance her writing and make the characters� emotions feel stronger and more vivid to the reader. I’m a pretty slow reader when it comes to books where the writing style is overly flowery or poetic, but I practically flew through this one! Believe me, if I’m scaring you with my descriptions…her writing isn’t hard to read. At all. This is one of the most engaging character-driven contemporaries out there, and the author’s writing style is that rare � and perfect - combination of simple and elegant.

Yes, I’m aware I sound dangerously like an annoying salesperson on one of those cringe-y commercials featuring unimaginably, unrealistically beautiful people and corny tag lines, thank you very much! Technically, I sort of am. This book does involve unimaginably beautiful characters and…well…not corny, but definitely quotable writing. Again, if you haven’t already…YOU HAVE TO PICK THIS BOOK UP.

The Characters

Ahhhhhhhhhhh.

My favourite, for some inexplicable reason, was Grace. And I say inexplicable because I loved all of these characters and wouldn’t have been able to pick a favourite under normal circumstances. I’m actually not sure why I empathized with Grace the most. I definitely related to Maya more and thought Joaquin’s character was the most layered and developed overall (not that the other two weren’t; Joaquin just had the most heartbreaking arc and the way his emotional trauma chiseled him into a paranoid, insecure person was just…suffice to say nearly every single one of Joaquin’s chapters had me on the verge of tears).

Grace. Maybe the reason I couldn’t wait to get to her chapters, the reason I was always rooting for her character, was just how much I admired her. Grace is one of those rare YA protagonists who’s just genuinely�nice. Not that she didn’t have her dramatic moments or never flared up � she did, a lot, and she totally had the right to. I can’t describe how angry I felt on her behalf throughout this book. The thing is…I love your morally grey characters as much as the next person. I do like angsty characters like Maya as well. Lately, though, I’ve just been drawn to characters like Grace a lot more. Characters who are optimistic and love people, despite the odds and despite their flaws. People who choose to care. About themselves and about everyone around them, even when they don’t have to. Grace gets pregnant, and her ex-boyfriend just pretends the whole thing never happened. His parents pin the whole thing on Grace (and they obviously break up), his friends put her through a hell of slut-shaming and he does virtually nothing to step up and defend her, and he actually gets crowned homecoming king on the night she’s delivering her baby. Any teenager who’s had to go through that much would be at least a little bitter, and in addition to this, Grace has to keep second-guessing her decision-that-wasn’t-much-of-a-decision to give up her baby (because financial issues and parental pressure and stuff). She actually punches a dude in the face in the middle of a school day at one point.

Of our three protagonists, it’s always Grace who’s pushing to unite the three of them, to find their biological parents, to get to know each other, to bond, to forgive. I think Grace is the kind of person all of us should aspire to be. It’s her decision to find her birth mom when she has to give up her baby that sets off the chain of events that is this book. Throughout the novel, she struggles with hiding her history from her siblings because she’s afraid of them being unsupportive. Her arc is real, beautiful, and heart-wrenching. And as a character, she was definitely the most instrumental to the plot.

Next - Maya! Maya was…real. I found her to be the most relatable protagonist of the three (but then again, that was for very personal reasons). Maya was often pretty hard to like or even empathize with. She’s angsty, hot-tempered, way too sarcastic and sharp-tongued for her own good, and super edgy (but for understandable reasons). She has pretty strong principles when it comes to other people, but her own life is a mess. And she’s insecure about practically everything: her identity, her family, her relationship with her girlfriend, her siblings, her mom’s alcoholism.
Reading Maya’s chapters felt like reading an old diary of mine; it took close to every ounce of self-control in me to restrain myself from screaming into the book and shaking it until I could get through to her. I adored how accurate and in-depth her representation as a young queer girl went (I know experiences vary, but this was just so well done � the passage on how her queerness affected her personality and inadvertently resulted in her developing hang-ups with displaying platonic affection openly? MY HEART). I loved how her character progressed and developed over the course of the book. In short…Maya may have been my least favourite of the three protagonists, but I would still protect her with my life. I have no complaints regarding how her character was handled.

Joaquin! Joaquin was. Um. I don’t know how to do this.

I loved Joaquin, okay?

In many ways, Joaquin reminded me of Grace. In many ways, Joaquin reminded me of Maya. But, despite all that, he was still very much a beautifully layered, well-developed character of his own. The estranged sibling, the oldest baby no one was willing to adopt. The biracial kid with darker skin tones who was shuffled between foster homes and families that obviously had no idea how to handle him throughout his childhood. And I loved the treatment of subtle racism in this book. The racism Joaquin had to endure wasn’t very direct or obvious, but deeply impacted him � for the rest of his life! � nevertheless. It wasn’t glaringly indiscreet but still managed to scar his personality and outline the pattern the rest of his life would follow for him. It made him extremely self-aware, overly paranoid and/or cynical and painfully insecure all at once.

The book explores the consequences of a bigoted society and white privilege by drawing a contrast between the lives of Grace, Maya and Joaquin. Beyond the difference in their skin tones, Joaquin is essentially the same as his two siblings as a baby. But while Grace and Maya are accepted into loving and caring families at birth, Joaquin is shunned and shunted between foster homes, taught by each individual experience to feel like he’s different for something he cannot help. The scars of emotional trauma from his childhood clearly manifest themselves into his adolescence as he’s never able to feel like he’s enough for any relationship � be it familial, platonic, romantic or otherwise. He shuts people out, engages in self-sabotaging behaviour and only attends therapy because he feels emotionally guilted into doing so by his latest set of foster parents. And he’s moulded by society to feel like his needs are always secondary. At the beginning of the book, Joaquin is defined by his race, whether he knows it or not (the text doesn’t make it obvious, but it’s pretty evident after finishing the book. No, this book does not make “everything about race�). His life would have looked dramatically different had he been or even looked whiter. By the end, however, his character’s gone through a drastic series of changes and developed wonderfully. In fact, I loved his character progression the most. And he gets a happy ending! That made me want to cry more than everything else in this emotional rollercoaster of a book put together.

The Plot

The plot for this book is obviously very character-driven and primarily focusses on the beautiful and blossoming relationships between our various protagonists. It’s everything.

Conclusion �n Final Thoughts

I loved this book to death. I wanted to make a separate section for all the beautiful relationships within its pages, but my review ended up wayyy longer than I intended it to. Suffice to say…Joaquin’s relationship with his parents was golden (totally worth reading the book for alone), Maya’s with her biological sister was just heartwarming, and even the romances were pretty well-done (I actually kinda liked them all! They weren’t revolutionary or very central to the story, but łŮłó˛ąłŮ’s pretty revolutionary for me). I also loved how perfectly it captured the alienation Grace felt from her friends after her pregnancy â€� it was obvious they were well-intentioned, but they started to get really awkward around her and didn’t know how to help. Ugh. This was just beautiful. Highly recommended.

Final Rating: One of the easiest 5/5s I’ve ever given out and wholly deserving of all the praise and awards that’ve been heaped on it over the past two years.

xx
Berry

(P.S � You can listen to the first chapter of this book on the Epic Reads YouTube channel � the narration is simply gorgeous, FYI. It’s what got me into the book, although I read the rest of it via e-book.)
<3

------

My Blog:
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