" Content warning: (view spoiler)[chronic illness, death of a loved one (happened in past, off-page), descriptions of an abusive relationship (hide spoiler)]

Dislikes: None! This book is perfect.

Likes:

The first line.

Once upon a time, Chloe Brown died.

What a way to begin! That’s a surefire way to get any reader’s attention instantly.

Red(ford). He is the sweetest being on fictional Earth! He’s considerate, nosy but in a charming sort of way, helpful, generous, kind and tatted. Nice guys in books usually bore me, but Red was impossible to dislike because he was just so precious.

He knew himself well enough to realize that he’d care for a great white shark if given half the chance. He helped. Always. He just couldn’t help himself.

Chloe. She comes off as a grump, but she’s actually a huge softie. She’s a sarcastic and witty homebody who likes to plan things and save cats from trees.

Red & Chloe’s teasing banter. It was entertaining, harmless and cute. One of the many funny exchanges that took place happened right before they rode his motorcycle for the first time.

“Where do you think I’ll find the most reliable crash statistics? Gov.uk?�
“Maybe,� he mused. “Or maybe, I don’t know . . . ScaredyCats.com?�

The side characters. I missed my bby Eve so much!!! She’s just as adorable in this as she was in her own story. If you haven’t read Eve’s book yet, wtf are you doing? Go read it asap. It’s a masterpiece. It’s even better than this and that’s really saying something because I loved the 💩 out of this. I also loved seeing Dani and Gigi again. I like the Brown sisters� mom as well, but I forget her name welp.

It’s hilarious. Hibbert is the funniest romcom writer I’ve ever come across.

Redford being attracted to her despite not wanting to be and vice versa. I don’t know what it is about this trope, but I eat it up every time. When they can’t resist each other no matter how hard they try? OMG I die. I love it so much. Jacob from AYAEB did the same thing and any reminder of him is a reminder I want.

High up on the list of annoying things about Chloe Brown was her beautiful bloody face. She had the kind of brilliant, decadent, Rococo beauty that made his fingers itch to grab a pencil or a paintbrush. It was ridiculously over the top: gleaming brown skin, winged eyebrows with a slightly sarcastic tilt, a mouth you could sink into like a feather bed. She had no business looking like that. None at all.

Vik and Red’s friendship. It was so healthy and pure. They give each other hugs, openly talk about their feelings, and provide each other with unconditional love and support.

The saving-a-cat-from-a-tree scene. We got introduced to Smudge—who stole the book btw—and got to see Red climb up to rescue her like a true knight in shining armor and act super concerned about her wellbeing ((way more concerned than someone who ‘hates� her should be acting)). I mean, seriously, who did he think he was fooling with all that nonsense about ‘hating Chloe�?

She was crouched awkwardly on the last branch.
“Want me to catch you?�
“I’d rather die.�

He calls her Button 🥺 if that isn’t the cutest thing I’ve ever heard . . . What makes this endearment extra special is that it annoys Chloe (yeah, sure, sister, whatever you say psssh) to the point where she spits out hilarious one-liners like this:

“If you actually intend to start calling me Button, I may sew one into your tongue.�

The emails they sent back and forth in chapter eight were so adorable!! I was giggling to myself like a psycho.

Their camping trip. They connected on so many levels during that trip. They played 21 Questions, which reminded me of Wattpad but idc because I love that cliche crap. Red opened up to her about his past (P.S. I want to brutally murder his ex-girlfriend 🙃). There was plenty of banter and teasing to balance out the depressing conversations. And last but definitely not least: they had sex!!!! HOW FUN! It was sooo romantic y’all. They did it in a tent with romantic lights surrounding them for anyone who’s wondering. Here’s a snippet of the teasing from that day:

“I thought long and hard about all the ways I want to define this tent tonight.� He shot her a grin that only widened when he caught sight of her face. “Aw, Chlo. Am I embarrassing you?� A blush crept up her throat. “I am embarrassing you,� he said, clearly pleased. “Wait until you see the air mattress.�
“The what?� she almost shrieked.
“Well, you didn’t think I was going to fuck you on the ground, did you? I’m not a complete animal.�
“You, sir, are a menace. A menace to good and decent society, and to noble, chaste women such as myself.�

(view spoiler)[Chloe got Smudge back in the end! YAY! I was an inconsolable mess when Annie took him, so when she brought him back to our girl, I was over the moon. (hide spoiler)]

Writing this review is making me want to reread this masterpiece so imma go and do that now. Bye! :)"

"2.5 �

“I’ll take you however I can have you. In here, where it’s just us. Out there, in front of everybody. I’ll follow your lead.�

i’m sad to be giving this book such a low rating, cause i really did enjoy Etta Easton’s debut but The Love Simulation fell flat in comparison. i liked the premise of the characters participating in a mars simulation where they have to “survive� in order to earn money for their school, but the romance wasn’t doing it for me. i didn’t even think Brianna or Roman were unlikable necessarily, cause they were fine. it’s just that they were lacking chemistry and their connection felt surface level and kind of.. bland? with no sort of stakes or anything.

“The only way you can let me down is if you started hiding who you are. You may think I bring out the best in you, but im only helping you see the man who is already there. The man I love.�

another thing that was annoying me were all the pop culture references� there’s movie, romance book and tiktok dances mentioned and i really did not like that at all, it kept pulling me out of the story. also, i don’t think a book character should be using phrases like “delulu� .. i find that embarrassing but idk, maybe it’s just me. the miscommunication in the third act was unnecessary and glossed over quickly, with everything being resolved too easily. i just felt like Brianna was truly obsessed with Roman from the start and he never quite matched her level of admiration, although the journal entries he wrote about her were so sweet. forced proximity is one of my favorite tropes but i never connected to anything in the story, so I wasn’t invested in the outcome of it all. i’m left feeling disappointed by this one and it honestly felt like it was written by a completely different author.

� many thanks to NetGalley, the author and Berkley Publishing Group for the arc, all opinions are my own."