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To the Survivors: One Man's Journey as a Rape Crisis Counselor with True Stories of Sexual Violence
To the Survivors is about one man’s journey as a rape crisis counselor with true stories of sexual violence shared by survivors in their own words. Gently and beautifully constructed, To the Survivors is moving, tender, sharp, and piercingly true all at once. Readers will encounter uncensored written stories, poems, and interviews from women and men who have experienced rape and sexual assault, plus the advocate-author voice that weaves their experiences together. The survivors are diverse in age, gender, and ethnicity, yet each gives a similarity raw and heartfelt account of his or her victimization and recovery. The authenticity and vulnerability with which survivors speak resonates profoundly. But this book is not just for survivors of sexual violence. Robert Uttaro believes anyone can benefit from the words in these pages, rape survivor or not.
251 pages, Paperback
First published October 23, 2013
41 people are currently reading
5,484 people want to read
About the author
Robert Uttaro
1Ìýbook76ÌýfollowersRobert Uttaro is currently in his 17th year as a rape crisis counselor and community educator. Inspired by his undergraduate studies in Criminal Justice, he continues to embrace a life-long commitment to activism and advocacy for survivors of sexual violence. Serving as a counselor, Uttaro supports rape survivors and their significant others through myriad emotional, spiritual, and legal issues. He also facilitates workshops that unpack the realities of sexual violence, and offers strategies for support and prevention with a focus on healing. Uttaro has been featured in magazine publications throughout the world and on international radio broadcasts. Through the grace of God, Uttaro's work and To the Survivors continues to impact peoplesâ€� minds and hearts globally.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 65 reviews
May 11, 2017
Disclaimer: I received this book free of charge from the Å·±¦ÓéÀÖ giveaways page.
A rape crisis counselor works tirelessly to not only help the victims, but to educate the general public about sexual violence. A heart-wrenching book that brought me to tears ... more than once and, yet, a book that I would highly recommend that everyone finds the time to read.
A rape crisis counselor works tirelessly to not only help the victims, but to educate the general public about sexual violence. A heart-wrenching book that brought me to tears ... more than once and, yet, a book that I would highly recommend that everyone finds the time to read.
December 9, 2015
I guess someone has to be the odd man out in reviews so it might as well be me. I did not enjoy this. There I said it. Now before everyone goes on a "You're an asshole and you just don't understand" posting spree let me explain why.
First off, I respect the author and the work he has done. He is an amazing person who does what very few people can do or want to do. In fact the world could use several hundred more people like him. Maybe if more people were like him we could maybe educate more people on sexual violence and have the number of people affected come down. That would be awesome.
Second..I do understand, in fact probably more than some of you would ever really know. So don't try getting into a pissing contest with me about this because not only would you lose I could make the hair on the back of your neck stand up and give you nightmares for weeks. That is all I'm going to say about that.
Third - I was an RA back in college. I was trained in what to do in these types of situations. In addition my senior project dealt with violence of all kinds on college campuses. Once again, nightmares for weeks and the hair standing up on the back of your neck.
So why did I not enjoy this?
The simple reason is the repetition of the same information over and over again. I wouldn't say the writing was atrocious, but honestly after the first 100 pages the author started losing me. For the next 168 pages I found myself skipping whole paragraphs. This is not the way to gain readers or to get a message out. This would have been a much more informative read if this was done so much differently. Information in the front without repeating the same stuff over and over again and more survivor stories afterwards with a much wider audience of participants.
First off, I respect the author and the work he has done. He is an amazing person who does what very few people can do or want to do. In fact the world could use several hundred more people like him. Maybe if more people were like him we could maybe educate more people on sexual violence and have the number of people affected come down. That would be awesome.
Second..I do understand, in fact probably more than some of you would ever really know. So don't try getting into a pissing contest with me about this because not only would you lose I could make the hair on the back of your neck stand up and give you nightmares for weeks. That is all I'm going to say about that.
Third - I was an RA back in college. I was trained in what to do in these types of situations. In addition my senior project dealt with violence of all kinds on college campuses. Once again, nightmares for weeks and the hair standing up on the back of your neck.
So why did I not enjoy this?
The simple reason is the repetition of the same information over and over again. I wouldn't say the writing was atrocious, but honestly after the first 100 pages the author started losing me. For the next 168 pages I found myself skipping whole paragraphs. This is not the way to gain readers or to get a message out. This would have been a much more informative read if this was done so much differently. Information in the front without repeating the same stuff over and over again and more survivor stories afterwards with a much wider audience of participants.
May 24, 2019
I got about a quarter of the way through and I really couldn't get past the self-congratulatory tone of Uttaro's narrative. I did skim for the sections where survivors talked about their experiences and found that to be somewhat helpful. As a multiple-time survivor myself, I just could stand to read about aaaaaall the wonderful things this MAN has done (he constantly brings attention to the fact that he's a man and yet he's such a good person despite that) and how enlightened he is and how everyone else should be more like him in their mindsets. That's really what I was getting. I understand that different survivors will react differently and some may find this book helpful, and of course that's great. I just couldn't get into it.
Also, there was a distracting amount of spelling and grammar errors. Again, something that might not bother other people, but my eyes go right to them.
Also, there was a distracting amount of spelling and grammar errors. Again, something that might not bother other people, but my eyes go right to them.
April 23, 2021
Talking about sexual violence is always tough. Even though we are led to believe we are in a progressive society, sharing personal experiences about trauma is not an easy task.
But Robert Uttaro, who works as a rape counsellor for THP - The Healing Place has made this impossible task possible for us to read and understand these experiences through the survivor’s minds.
You might say I’m not ready for such a graphic book. And yet I will say that you must not skip this book. Because on the contrary it is a book filled with positivity, kindness, compassion and the very quality of recognizing each other as a human being.
The delicate and gentle way that Robert Uttaro has handled all these stories portray genuine concern and a will to help those affected by this tragedy.
These stories will tell you exactly what you can do and need to do to make an impact in a person’s life. And Robert insists these things are as small as listening to a survivor and believing in their story.
This book is about their journey thereafter, how although their pain is deep, they can heal, they can grow, they can survive without remembering the traumatic details every day.
Here you’ll find stories by women, stories by men, stories by Trans-genders, stories of being abused as children, stories of being abused by family and friends. Stories that came to light 50 years later. Poignant and tender poems written by survivors and so much more.
What you take away from this wonderful compilation is the most important thing. India and the world are fighting this epidemic and we need to make ourselves aware of some realties against this background.
Robert Uttaro believes anyone can benefit from the words in these pages, rape survivor or not.
For my Full Review and lessons learned, please visit my blog -
But Robert Uttaro, who works as a rape counsellor for THP - The Healing Place has made this impossible task possible for us to read and understand these experiences through the survivor’s minds.
You might say I’m not ready for such a graphic book. And yet I will say that you must not skip this book. Because on the contrary it is a book filled with positivity, kindness, compassion and the very quality of recognizing each other as a human being.
The delicate and gentle way that Robert Uttaro has handled all these stories portray genuine concern and a will to help those affected by this tragedy.
These stories will tell you exactly what you can do and need to do to make an impact in a person’s life. And Robert insists these things are as small as listening to a survivor and believing in their story.
This book is about their journey thereafter, how although their pain is deep, they can heal, they can grow, they can survive without remembering the traumatic details every day.
Here you’ll find stories by women, stories by men, stories by Trans-genders, stories of being abused as children, stories of being abused by family and friends. Stories that came to light 50 years later. Poignant and tender poems written by survivors and so much more.
What you take away from this wonderful compilation is the most important thing. India and the world are fighting this epidemic and we need to make ourselves aware of some realties against this background.
Robert Uttaro believes anyone can benefit from the words in these pages, rape survivor or not.
For my Full Review and lessons learned, please visit my blog -
March 22, 2022
A powerful book that isn't an easy read but this isn't an easy topic. This man has courageously presented the issue of sexual violence in a very well-written book. The text is gripping and the use of poetry from survivors brings certain clarity to this critical issue.
One can only applaud the number of roadblocks the author overcame on his journey. There are myriad times when he faced things that just make common sense people shake their heads. This book could be triggering for people who are survivors, and it is aptly warned in the preface.
It is a sad fact that the people who would most benefit from this book will never read it. If this book stopped one person from choosing to attack another, it would be world-changing. This book should be mandatory reading for every AD and major male sports coach in the US College system. It is very far past the time when the 'boys being boys' culture needed to end.
Recommended to everyone touched by the issue of sexual violence. Recommended to everyone who wants to learn more about its horrific impact. An important book that needs to be read.
Disclaimer: I received a copy from the author in the hopes I'd review it. My thoughts are all my own.
My Rating: 5 stars
Reviewed by: Mr. N
This review first appeared:
One can only applaud the number of roadblocks the author overcame on his journey. There are myriad times when he faced things that just make common sense people shake their heads. This book could be triggering for people who are survivors, and it is aptly warned in the preface.
It is a sad fact that the people who would most benefit from this book will never read it. If this book stopped one person from choosing to attack another, it would be world-changing. This book should be mandatory reading for every AD and major male sports coach in the US College system. It is very far past the time when the 'boys being boys' culture needed to end.
Recommended to everyone touched by the issue of sexual violence. Recommended to everyone who wants to learn more about its horrific impact. An important book that needs to be read.
Disclaimer: I received a copy from the author in the hopes I'd review it. My thoughts are all my own.
My Rating: 5 stars
Reviewed by: Mr. N
This review first appeared:
April 19, 2019
When a woman is sexually harassed, her misery just doesn’t end there. Most of the times, it is followed by societal stigmatization of that woman. She is often asked questions that are inconsiderate about her well-being. The police, the doctors and the judges are known to aggravate the agony. The victims constantly come across remarks that are extremely humiliating and psychologically painful, they are usually the ones who have to hide, to remain anonymous, and the rapist roam freely. This is what the book is based on. It is basically Robert Uttaro’s journey as a rape crisis counselor with true stories of sexual violence shared by survivors in their own words. The stories are hard-hitting and shows all that the survivors have to go through while seeking justice for themselves. Reading these stories made me feel uneasy, angry, sad, and very hopeless at times. Sexual violence is a difficult topic to think about and even harder to deal with. And the way the survivors shared their story showed how strong they are.
The book also talked about the men and boys who have been sexually assaulted. Very little attention has been paid to such survivors in the media, and people find it hard to digest, but they may experience the same effects of sexual assault as other survivors. They feel shame and self-doubt, believing that they should have been “strong enough� to fight off the perpetrator.
The book has some poems which are absolutely moving. Robert has written the book with grace, compassion and clear-eyed courage. The book is poignant, enthralling and absolutely unputdownable.
The book also talked about the men and boys who have been sexually assaulted. Very little attention has been paid to such survivors in the media, and people find it hard to digest, but they may experience the same effects of sexual assault as other survivors. They feel shame and self-doubt, believing that they should have been “strong enough� to fight off the perpetrator.
The book has some poems which are absolutely moving. Robert has written the book with grace, compassion and clear-eyed courage. The book is poignant, enthralling and absolutely unputdownable.
July 12, 2015
To the Survivors: One Man's Journey as a Rape Crisis Counselor with True Stories of Sexual Violence by rape crisis counselor Robert Uttaro is a book dedicated to all who have been affected by sexual violence, and a portion of the proceeds of which will be donated to rape crisis centers. In it, Robert takes a searing but objective look at sexual violence through the lens of a counselor which he described as painful and fulfilling.
Though the journey has been a difficult one, Robert insisted that his work has inspired him in many ways and the first-hand knowledge of the suffering of the victims helped him to become a better listener, counselor and public speaker. "My heart has been broken and uplifted many times, but my spirit and faith have never left me. I've seen a lot of pain and heard a lot of horrible stories. I have listened to some of the most disturbing things possible."
Reading To the Survivors by Robert Uttaro will open your eyes to the cruelty and inhumanity of the perpetrators of these crimes of sexual violence, and change your attitude not only toward the victims but also the criminals. It will change your perception and help you realize what you once thought impossible is very much possible. Disturbing, painful yet honest and insightful, the stories in the book are mostly tales stranger than fiction.
Though the journey has been a difficult one, Robert insisted that his work has inspired him in many ways and the first-hand knowledge of the suffering of the victims helped him to become a better listener, counselor and public speaker. "My heart has been broken and uplifted many times, but my spirit and faith have never left me. I've seen a lot of pain and heard a lot of horrible stories. I have listened to some of the most disturbing things possible."
Reading To the Survivors by Robert Uttaro will open your eyes to the cruelty and inhumanity of the perpetrators of these crimes of sexual violence, and change your attitude not only toward the victims but also the criminals. It will change your perception and help you realize what you once thought impossible is very much possible. Disturbing, painful yet honest and insightful, the stories in the book are mostly tales stranger than fiction.
January 17, 2022
To write about something as grim as sexual assault is not easy. To read it is also a difficult task.
To the Survivors by Robert Uttaro encapsulates the author's experiences when he volunteered as a counsellor at the rape crisis centre at Ashville. He got to interact with other volunteers and the rape survivors. He also heard their stories that left him shaken and thinking.
To the Survivors flits in between Robert's first-hand experiences and of those who survived the gravity of sexual violence. It was quite a jarring experience for me to read this book for the verbatim stories of survivors disturbed me.
It is a book that essentially focuses on sexual violence, healing and forgiveness. By the end of the book, you might feel both sad and happy - sad for whatever happened but happy for how the people actually went about their grief and healed.
Healing is a process. It might take one a few months, a year or many years. You never know.
But it is important to grieve, to make peace, and allow yourself to heal.
That is probably the only way to progress and live. Perhaps.
I am glad that Robert exhibited sheer kindness while talking about his experiences and that of other sexual assault survivors.
However, I do feel that I had slightly different expectations from the book. Going by its title, I believed that it would be some sort of dedication to the survivors. The content of the book doesn't fully justify this.
Nevertheless, it is a book written with a clear intent of initiating conversation around the difficult subject of sexual violence. Kudos to Robert for that. If the premise sounds good to you, you can definitely check it out.
To the Survivors by Robert Uttaro encapsulates the author's experiences when he volunteered as a counsellor at the rape crisis centre at Ashville. He got to interact with other volunteers and the rape survivors. He also heard their stories that left him shaken and thinking.
To the Survivors flits in between Robert's first-hand experiences and of those who survived the gravity of sexual violence. It was quite a jarring experience for me to read this book for the verbatim stories of survivors disturbed me.
It is a book that essentially focuses on sexual violence, healing and forgiveness. By the end of the book, you might feel both sad and happy - sad for whatever happened but happy for how the people actually went about their grief and healed.
Healing is a process. It might take one a few months, a year or many years. You never know.
But it is important to grieve, to make peace, and allow yourself to heal.
That is probably the only way to progress and live. Perhaps.
I am glad that Robert exhibited sheer kindness while talking about his experiences and that of other sexual assault survivors.
However, I do feel that I had slightly different expectations from the book. Going by its title, I believed that it would be some sort of dedication to the survivors. The content of the book doesn't fully justify this.
Nevertheless, it is a book written with a clear intent of initiating conversation around the difficult subject of sexual violence. Kudos to Robert for that. If the premise sounds good to you, you can definitely check it out.
February 5, 2022
To The Survivors by Robert Uttaro is a heartfelt memoir about rape survivors. Each and every chapter in this book is a different survivor story written by the author, lending it a voice that could be heard by everyone. It wasn't always easy to read these stories, but I felt that it was important, in some way, to read them all, and to spread awareness about this book because the more the people read this book, the more the victims and survivors will feel heard.
I would recommend this book to every reader, though I would also like to caution them about a plethora of triggers that this book has. So read the blurb carefully before starting this book. If you are okay with the triggers then this book is a beautiful one that will open your eyes to the many things women are subjected to in the world and will help you broaden your perspective when it comes to feminism and why it is needed in the first place among many such misunderstood concepts.
You can also read this review on
I would recommend this book to every reader, though I would also like to caution them about a plethora of triggers that this book has. So read the blurb carefully before starting this book. If you are okay with the triggers then this book is a beautiful one that will open your eyes to the many things women are subjected to in the world and will help you broaden your perspective when it comes to feminism and why it is needed in the first place among many such misunderstood concepts.
You can also read this review on
April 6, 2021
I got this ebook as a giveaway through Å·±¦ÓéÀÖ. As excited as I was about this book I found it really hard to read and not due to its subject matter. The writing itself is just bad, I couldn't get past the first few chapters which is really quiet unfortunate because I wanted to read the stories of the survivors but I Couldn't push through. I would not recommend this book to someone who wants to educate themselves or others about sexual assault and it's survivors I think there are other books out there with expertise and survivor stories that are written in a better way (quiet a few that I've read). I commend the author for their work with education and assisting survivors but this book just didn't meet my expectations. It's one star for me.
January 13, 2016
Tis book is eye opening for me. I would say this book was also intense to some degree. I think I learned a lot and the author seems to have a lot of knowledge on the subject. I was taken back in a good way by this book. * I received this book from the author in exchange for an honest review*
September 3, 2020
To the survivors is a book written about sexual abuse for young adults. The self-help book’s narrative is told by a rape crisis counsellor, retelling the survivors� true stories. The stories are uncensored and authentic to the word. They contain a sensitive and descriptive voice and vary from age, ethnicity, and gender.
The content is profoundly touching and is not for the lighthearted. As you read along, you tend to feel various emotions, but above all, feel some light for each individual. Just knowing that regardless of the hardship and horrible encounter, the victim finds peace and heals were very satisfying to read.
The literature was easy to read and to understand.
The book is more useful to people who want to work in crisis management centres, become counsellors, and are psychology majors.
However, anyone could also read the book and have a better understanding of how difficult it is to go through such a journey and to endure.
I admired the author’s reason for becoming a counsellor and appreciated his nature of wanting to help. I look forward to reading more from this author.
The content is profoundly touching and is not for the lighthearted. As you read along, you tend to feel various emotions, but above all, feel some light for each individual. Just knowing that regardless of the hardship and horrible encounter, the victim finds peace and heals were very satisfying to read.
The literature was easy to read and to understand.
The book is more useful to people who want to work in crisis management centres, become counsellors, and are psychology majors.
However, anyone could also read the book and have a better understanding of how difficult it is to go through such a journey and to endure.
I admired the author’s reason for becoming a counsellor and appreciated his nature of wanting to help. I look forward to reading more from this author.
December 10, 2015
To The Survivors has left a very profound impact on me. To say I was affected deeply while and after reading it is an understatement. There were moments when my eyes watered, and there were moments when I was filled with a sense of hope. To The Survivors is not a story about a legal body nor does the author mention the real name of the institution he works with, lest it be perceived as a promotional document of some sort (he's assigned it the fictional title of "The Healing Place"). It is not a book that in any way preaches or tells you what to do. Most importantly, it does not call anyone a "victim". Anyone who has suffered sexual assault is referred to as a "survivor". That in itself is an empowering thought.
Please read the rest of my review here:
Please read the rest of my review here:
August 12, 2022
I barely ever give out 5 star ratings to any book so needless to say that this book was one hell of an insightful read. In 'To The Survivors' the author discusses his experience as a rape crisis counselor and the real life stories of the survivors in their own words. I don't want to give anything away about the author's remarkable journey or the survivors experiences and their healing process, which is why I'm simply going to recommend this with all of my heart to anyone and everyone.
I do admit that reading this is not going to be easy but once you do, it is surely going to take you on an emotional journey.
I do admit that reading this is not going to be easy but once you do, it is surely going to take you on an emotional journey.
January 6, 2014
To the Survivors is the kind of book that allows people access to survivors intimate stories of experiencing sexual assault. The stories shared in To the Survivors are remarkably earnest. it his book illustrates both the damage that sexual abuse can cause and how survivors in this book have dealt with that trauma and worked toward healing. The intensity of the book is tempered by positivity as it is far more than just a collection of accounts of sexual violence survivors. Anyone could benefit from reading this book, it is moving, brave, and captivating to read.
August 10, 2019
Note: I received a copy of this book from a Å·±¦ÓéÀÖ Giveaway.
I really wanted to like this. The subject matter is gutting and horrible and with the #metoo movement, I appreciated the relevance of this book. However, the writing was just not to my taste. I noticed an unbelievable amount of repetition and word choices that would have been more appropriate in a spoken conversation.
Perhaps this would have been better executed as a podcast interview?
But I have so much respect for the author and the work he does. It is obvious that he is passionate about helping others.
I really wanted to like this. The subject matter is gutting and horrible and with the #metoo movement, I appreciated the relevance of this book. However, the writing was just not to my taste. I noticed an unbelievable amount of repetition and word choices that would have been more appropriate in a spoken conversation.
Perhaps this would have been better executed as a podcast interview?
But I have so much respect for the author and the work he does. It is obvious that he is passionate about helping others.
October 8, 2019
Disclaimer: I won this in a goodreads giveaway. This opinions are my own honest opinions.
In some instances I was not a fan of the writing it was choppy at times. The message behind the book is important but the medium sort of makes it fall short. This would've been an excellent podcast, as someone has already stated in a previous review.
In some instances I was not a fan of the writing it was choppy at times. The message behind the book is important but the medium sort of makes it fall short. This would've been an excellent podcast, as someone has already stated in a previous review.
December 8, 2013
LOVE this book! Every single person should read To the Survivors! It is LIFE-CHANGING in the best way! Buy it for yourself and for family and friends...you won't be sorry. In a substantially long life of reading, this is one of the most powerful books I've ever read!!
April 21, 2020
Chapter 1
Robert “Bobby�, Italian/Irish/Scottish American Catholic, Aaliyah (friend), Father Jackson, Father Thompson, Father Tim (arrested indecent assault/battery), Father Thompson (head priest), Tito (friend),
Chapter 2
Carmen (Community Outreach Dept.), Aila (Legal Dept.), The Healing Place (THP) services: a 24-hour hotline, 24-hour emergency room accompaniment, counseling, legal assistance, case management services, educational workshops,
Chapter 3
Mary
Chapter 4
Training
1 Shame. 2 Guilt. 3 Depression. 4 Sadness. 5 Loss of Control. 6 Vulnerability. 7 Fear. 8 Anger. 9 Anxiety. 10 Shock. 11 Disbelief. 12 Embarrassment. 13 Becoming suicidal or committing suicide. 14 Isolation. 15 Distrust. 16 Self-medication, self-harm: substance abuse, cutting or burning. 17 Changes in eating patterns. 18 Changes in sleeping. 19 Startle responses. 20 Nightmares. 21 Confusion. 22 Difficulty concentrating. 23 Safety concerns.
Madelin “Maddie� (suicide)
Sexual Assault Nurse Examiner (SANE) nurses
Chapter 5
Case Management
Joan, Community Outreach Dept., DV shelters, Veronika (Russian, victim/survivor),
Chapter 6
Outreach & Education (O & E), Laureen boss,
Chapter 7
Megan (Outreach & Education employee), Rebecca (student victim/survivor), Todd (Rebecca’s BF, supporter), Alexis (student victim/ survivor), Corey (student victim/survivor),
Chapter 8
3-day punk rock music festival, Dave O & E volunteer,
Chapter 9
Corey (victim/ survivor), Bill (58, 62, perpetrator, indecent/assault, 2-years� probation, $250 fine), Shira THP “Slut Walk�,
Chapter 10
Justice, Megan poem,
Chapter 11
Victim blaming, Mike (perpetrator), Nikki (wife-ex, victim/survivor),
Chapter 12
Megan (victim/survivor), (47, m, voice teacher, perpetrator), Tommy (perpetrator),
Chapter 14
Shira (victim/survivor),
Chapter 15
Alexis (victim/survivor), Jim 13, 8th grade, sexually abused by Father O’Donnell Catholic priest, Cardinal Bernard Francis Law (American, MA), Cardinal Richard James Cushing (American, MA), Cardinal Humberto Sousa Medeiros Portuguese American, MA), Pope Benedict XVI (German, Joseph Aloisius Ratzinger), Pope John Paul II (Polish, Karol Józef Wojtyła)
Chapter 16
Don 55+,
Chapter 17
Chris
Chapter 18
Corey
Chapter 19
Shira 20, Las Vegas, NV
Chapter 20
Jenee
Chapter 21
Timothy, forgiveness,
Chapter 22
Wrap up, points of view, helpful hints
Not once did I come across a female/male who wanted to harm/kill their perpetrator when they confronted them in court.
“This book is dedicated to all who have been affected by sexual violence.�
This is me/I. Thank you!
I am a retired Emergency Service MH (7 counties)/K-12 school social worker, case manager.
I have worked with/as US Army vets (Ft. Dix, NJ, Vietnam era), Court Appointed Special Advocate (CASA) volunteer; Juvenile detention; Eldorado prison; Plumb Place; Shiloh House; Emporia Rescue
Mission; jail environment.
I do not receive any type of compensation for reading & reviewing free books from publishers & authors. Therefore, I am under no obligation to write a positive review, only an honest one.
Warning: This book contains extremely graphic adult content, violence, or expletive language &/or uncensored sexually explicit material (bi-sexual, transvestite, Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Queer, Intersex, Asexual (LGBTQIA), incest, pedophile, rape, sodomy, child verbal/mental/physical/sexual abuse, kidnapping/prostitution of a minor, human sex slavery, & trafficking, BDSM) which is only suitable for mature readers. It may be offensive or have potential adverse psychological effects on the reader. If you are especially sensitive to this type of material, it is strongly advised not to read any further.
A very awesome book cover, great font & writing style. A fairly very well written sexual abuse book. It was very easy for me to read/follow from start/finish & never a dull moment. There were no grammar/typo errors, nor any repetitive or out of line sequence sentences. Lots of exciting scenarios, with several twists/turns & a semi-thorough description list of unique characters, settings, facts etc. to keep track of. This could also make another great movie, PP presentation, or better yet a mini TV series or even a documentary (NAMI; Frontline PBS).
It seems you kind of sugar-coated a lot of your clients. I prefer a more victim/survivor graphic detailed personal story. Your signed confidential release form allows you to do this.
That said I will only rate this book at 3/5 stars.
Thank you for the free author (s); Å·±¦ÓéÀÖ; MakingConnections; Making Connections discussion group talk; Author; PDF book.
Tony Parsons MSW (Washburn)
Robert “Bobby�, Italian/Irish/Scottish American Catholic, Aaliyah (friend), Father Jackson, Father Thompson, Father Tim (arrested indecent assault/battery), Father Thompson (head priest), Tito (friend),
Chapter 2
Carmen (Community Outreach Dept.), Aila (Legal Dept.), The Healing Place (THP) services: a 24-hour hotline, 24-hour emergency room accompaniment, counseling, legal assistance, case management services, educational workshops,
Chapter 3
Mary
Chapter 4
Training
1 Shame. 2 Guilt. 3 Depression. 4 Sadness. 5 Loss of Control. 6 Vulnerability. 7 Fear. 8 Anger. 9 Anxiety. 10 Shock. 11 Disbelief. 12 Embarrassment. 13 Becoming suicidal or committing suicide. 14 Isolation. 15 Distrust. 16 Self-medication, self-harm: substance abuse, cutting or burning. 17 Changes in eating patterns. 18 Changes in sleeping. 19 Startle responses. 20 Nightmares. 21 Confusion. 22 Difficulty concentrating. 23 Safety concerns.
Madelin “Maddie� (suicide)
Sexual Assault Nurse Examiner (SANE) nurses
Chapter 5
Case Management
Joan, Community Outreach Dept., DV shelters, Veronika (Russian, victim/survivor),
Chapter 6
Outreach & Education (O & E), Laureen boss,
Chapter 7
Megan (Outreach & Education employee), Rebecca (student victim/survivor), Todd (Rebecca’s BF, supporter), Alexis (student victim/ survivor), Corey (student victim/survivor),
Chapter 8
3-day punk rock music festival, Dave O & E volunteer,
Chapter 9
Corey (victim/ survivor), Bill (58, 62, perpetrator, indecent/assault, 2-years� probation, $250 fine), Shira THP “Slut Walk�,
Chapter 10
Justice, Megan poem,
Chapter 11
Victim blaming, Mike (perpetrator), Nikki (wife-ex, victim/survivor),
Chapter 12
Megan (victim/survivor), (47, m, voice teacher, perpetrator), Tommy (perpetrator),
Chapter 14
Shira (victim/survivor),
Chapter 15
Alexis (victim/survivor), Jim 13, 8th grade, sexually abused by Father O’Donnell Catholic priest, Cardinal Bernard Francis Law (American, MA), Cardinal Richard James Cushing (American, MA), Cardinal Humberto Sousa Medeiros Portuguese American, MA), Pope Benedict XVI (German, Joseph Aloisius Ratzinger), Pope John Paul II (Polish, Karol Józef Wojtyła)
Chapter 16
Don 55+,
Chapter 17
Chris
Chapter 18
Corey
Chapter 19
Shira 20, Las Vegas, NV
Chapter 20
Jenee
Chapter 21
Timothy, forgiveness,
Chapter 22
Wrap up, points of view, helpful hints
Not once did I come across a female/male who wanted to harm/kill their perpetrator when they confronted them in court.
“This book is dedicated to all who have been affected by sexual violence.�
This is me/I. Thank you!
I am a retired Emergency Service MH (7 counties)/K-12 school social worker, case manager.
I have worked with/as US Army vets (Ft. Dix, NJ, Vietnam era), Court Appointed Special Advocate (CASA) volunteer; Juvenile detention; Eldorado prison; Plumb Place; Shiloh House; Emporia Rescue
Mission; jail environment.
I do not receive any type of compensation for reading & reviewing free books from publishers & authors. Therefore, I am under no obligation to write a positive review, only an honest one.
Warning: This book contains extremely graphic adult content, violence, or expletive language &/or uncensored sexually explicit material (bi-sexual, transvestite, Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Queer, Intersex, Asexual (LGBTQIA), incest, pedophile, rape, sodomy, child verbal/mental/physical/sexual abuse, kidnapping/prostitution of a minor, human sex slavery, & trafficking, BDSM) which is only suitable for mature readers. It may be offensive or have potential adverse psychological effects on the reader. If you are especially sensitive to this type of material, it is strongly advised not to read any further.
A very awesome book cover, great font & writing style. A fairly very well written sexual abuse book. It was very easy for me to read/follow from start/finish & never a dull moment. There were no grammar/typo errors, nor any repetitive or out of line sequence sentences. Lots of exciting scenarios, with several twists/turns & a semi-thorough description list of unique characters, settings, facts etc. to keep track of. This could also make another great movie, PP presentation, or better yet a mini TV series or even a documentary (NAMI; Frontline PBS).
It seems you kind of sugar-coated a lot of your clients. I prefer a more victim/survivor graphic detailed personal story. Your signed confidential release form allows you to do this.
That said I will only rate this book at 3/5 stars.
Thank you for the free author (s); Å·±¦ÓéÀÖ; MakingConnections; Making Connections discussion group talk; Author; PDF book.
Tony Parsons MSW (Washburn)
December 10, 2017
A book that brings out the darker side of life which often goes unnoticed since no one is willing to discuss about it. The book is about the rape survivors and how they came up strong leaving back the untold miseries that their life has brought on unknowingly and unsuspectingly.
This is a common phenomenon across the globe with not so severe punishment given to the offenders but on the other hand, the victim is subject to lot of untold hardships. This book will be an eye-opener and would also serve as an inspiration for the affected who at times are forced to take some extreme steps.
Divided into 22 chapters, the author Robert Uttaro(Bobby) who has worked in THP(The Healing Place)as a volunteer counsellor for sex/rape victims mentions about how this .has evolved and how some of the rapists go scott-free including some priests who weren't punished but were transferred to other parish. The author is not critical about any religion as he rightfully points that there is a Supreme Force above us which we call/believe as GOD.
We from India wouldn't have forgotten the famous Nirbhaya case which became a sensation after it got wide coverage in the media but we hardly would have got to know as to how the affected family felt especially after losing their daughter to the brutal rape and the events that followed after that. While murder is something which is not in our hands to be prevented, suicide and intention to commit suicide can certainly be prevented. It was a real shocking one to me to read that even in a much developed country like US, people are sceptical to talk about rape and there is no much awareness spread among them to get counselling in case they were a victim or been affected in the past.
The very famous sex scandal case which has rocked the Hollywood came to limelight very recently and what was even more shocking was some of the reputed women artists were also a victim. I am glad that at least by now they all came out openly to talk about it which has cornered the once famed producer. Sadly, many of the artists even in the Indian film industry has spoken about it since they were influenced by the so called powerful producers and directors who wanted a sexual favour in return for casting them in the film.
The list is actually long. It happens in a household with domestic maid to corporate where promotions are given based on favours received, While I am not accusing all, it is happening across the country which no one talks about. At this juncture, I would also like to mention about our own helpline SNEHA which gives counselling to those who were affected by sexual abuse.
It is also to be noted here that child abuse is on the rise since the kids who were unsuspecting were subject to molestation which also needs greater awareness. This book is certainly an eye-opener and may be used a tool for reference. The best part that anyone could do is to deploy the RAPE SURVIVOR. It is difficult but can certainly do wonders because it is the affected who can understand things better and can drive the message in the right direction,
The book may not be exhaustive since the rape happens in different forms in different places but it gives insight of what exactly is a sexual assault and what the victim can do. A must read for all irrespective of country,creed,caste,religion and age.
July 1, 2024
To the Survivors is the touching memoir written by Robert Uttaro. The book arrived in my hands at the proper time and just some days after learning about the upcoming conviction of Harvey Weinstein, the movie producer accused of sexual harassment and sexual violence against some now popular actresses.
To the Survivors is the journey of a 30 year American guy, Robert Uttaro, who serves as a voluntary counselor at a healing center for sexual trauma survivors in the United States.
Indeed, the complete title of the book is To the Survivors: One Man’s Journey as a Rape Crisis Counselor with True Stories of Sexual Violence.
The work is a light of hope in the black hole of loneliness of women, men and even children who have been victims of sexual violence.
Anyway, the work is not a debate about sexual violence, it is a way to give a voice to those who were raped by their best friends, their partners, their husband, their employer, by the priest in their parish. Behold: true stories, true life, not a Television show such as the one about the aforementioned Weinstein.
These stories tell about sexual violence by the depths of the soul of people, exposing their emotions after the rape their endured. Those are true people like me, like you, their stories are written through bold letters, with tender and sweet words. Some of them expressed their grief with the writing style of a poem.
The author is instead the counselor who takes the role of a gentle and respectful interviewer. The perspective of the entire work of Robert Uttaro is the one to make these survivors feel listened and understood. How much hard is to get understood in the field of sexual trauma? Blaming is always against victims and never against the true culprits, namely the rapists!
To the Survivors struck me very much, but the author said just that, in the initial pages of the book: “Some details can trigger very sensitive readers or those readers who have been raped�.
Well, I got never raped (I don’t remember about that, at least), but some stories of sexual violence triggered me the same.
I can reveal nothing, about the stories, but one of these caused me to violently curse the rapist, especially if he is a priest and the victim is a 13 year old boy who served him to the altar in a catholic parish!
I remained wordless, appalled and much raged!
To the Survivors gave a room to those who have had their life harmed and changed by sexual violence, because violence always changes you. Willy-nilly! However, the book gave also a message of recovery, hope and inner healing. That is the voice of the true protagonists of violence, it is sexual violence seen by inside, with all of its dreadful reality.
Through this work, sexual violence can be labeled for what it really is and victims for the one they really are: violence is evil and victims are persons who experienced an horrible crime against their body and their dignity.
This book has had the merit to give back dignity, respect and importance to sexual trauma survivors. They survived their painful experience and surviving and moving on is always a form of forgiveness.
To the Survivors is not a masterpiece, because I use this word for novels and fiction books, only. This book is a bright testimony about the human value of true people and the nothingness of sexual violence perpetrators.
To the Survivors is the journey of a 30 year American guy, Robert Uttaro, who serves as a voluntary counselor at a healing center for sexual trauma survivors in the United States.
Indeed, the complete title of the book is To the Survivors: One Man’s Journey as a Rape Crisis Counselor with True Stories of Sexual Violence.
The work is a light of hope in the black hole of loneliness of women, men and even children who have been victims of sexual violence.
Anyway, the work is not a debate about sexual violence, it is a way to give a voice to those who were raped by their best friends, their partners, their husband, their employer, by the priest in their parish. Behold: true stories, true life, not a Television show such as the one about the aforementioned Weinstein.
These stories tell about sexual violence by the depths of the soul of people, exposing their emotions after the rape their endured. Those are true people like me, like you, their stories are written through bold letters, with tender and sweet words. Some of them expressed their grief with the writing style of a poem.
The author is instead the counselor who takes the role of a gentle and respectful interviewer. The perspective of the entire work of Robert Uttaro is the one to make these survivors feel listened and understood. How much hard is to get understood in the field of sexual trauma? Blaming is always against victims and never against the true culprits, namely the rapists!
To the Survivors struck me very much, but the author said just that, in the initial pages of the book: “Some details can trigger very sensitive readers or those readers who have been raped�.
Well, I got never raped (I don’t remember about that, at least), but some stories of sexual violence triggered me the same.
I can reveal nothing, about the stories, but one of these caused me to violently curse the rapist, especially if he is a priest and the victim is a 13 year old boy who served him to the altar in a catholic parish!
I remained wordless, appalled and much raged!
To the Survivors gave a room to those who have had their life harmed and changed by sexual violence, because violence always changes you. Willy-nilly! However, the book gave also a message of recovery, hope and inner healing. That is the voice of the true protagonists of violence, it is sexual violence seen by inside, with all of its dreadful reality.
Through this work, sexual violence can be labeled for what it really is and victims for the one they really are: violence is evil and victims are persons who experienced an horrible crime against their body and their dignity.
This book has had the merit to give back dignity, respect and importance to sexual trauma survivors. They survived their painful experience and surviving and moving on is always a form of forgiveness.
To the Survivors is not a masterpiece, because I use this word for novels and fiction books, only. This book is a bright testimony about the human value of true people and the nothingness of sexual violence perpetrators.
July 1, 2023
-I learned on this day that some survivors actually expect to die during an assault. I also learned that some people dissociate during an assault, and most, if not all, have the goal to survive. (Kindle version)
-My message to people still in the early stages of battling the fallout from sexual assault is this: You may not be there yet, but you will get there. (Kindle-Version)
The stories survivors tell in this book hit me very hard. It made me so sad to read what they had experienced, and in some moments reading on became difficult due to what these survivors told. I believe that possibly applies to many readers, and more so to survivors who recognize that what happened to them also happened to someone else. The things survivors report here are very personal and they are saddening, if not outright shocking due to the suffering these survivors were forced to endure, often by someone close to them.
Nevertheless, reading these reports can be helpful. One of the things that many survivors deal with is shame, and this also shows throughout many of these reports. That survivors feel shame for what someone else did to them is a fact, and it is something that survivors have to deal with. But it can help to realize that this is something others experienced as well, and that none of what happened was the survivor’s fault. Feelings of shame and blame come up over and over again in these texts, and seeing how terribly real people are affected by these feelings is horrible.
What I liked most about this title is that it is so unpretentious. Uttaro does not claim to have all the answers (he does not even claim this book could help all survivors). Instead he states that he has some opinions and ideas, he also has his own professional knowledge because of his work with survivors. He is aware that everybody has their own story, and there is no one-shoe-fits-all way to healing after experiencing sexual violence. And he emphasizes that his book cannot replace professional help in any form, and it is not meant to.
That being said, I found his book helpful, and it is actually written in a rather vivid style, which I also liked. Even the introduction shows the author’s deep understanding about the topic, and he shows this understanding throughout the book when he introduces situations and survivors who write about their experience. The reports feel real, they are raw and personal, most of them touched me deeply, and some of them were just too much, but this is not meant as criticism at all. This book is definitely worth reading, and I am glad that a title showing what rape and sexual violence really do to you exists, and this title will hopefully be read by many.
6 out of 5 stars
Trigger warning:
due to the reports of survivors there are definitely many lines in this book that can be triggering for survivors.
-My message to people still in the early stages of battling the fallout from sexual assault is this: You may not be there yet, but you will get there. (Kindle-Version)
The stories survivors tell in this book hit me very hard. It made me so sad to read what they had experienced, and in some moments reading on became difficult due to what these survivors told. I believe that possibly applies to many readers, and more so to survivors who recognize that what happened to them also happened to someone else. The things survivors report here are very personal and they are saddening, if not outright shocking due to the suffering these survivors were forced to endure, often by someone close to them.
Nevertheless, reading these reports can be helpful. One of the things that many survivors deal with is shame, and this also shows throughout many of these reports. That survivors feel shame for what someone else did to them is a fact, and it is something that survivors have to deal with. But it can help to realize that this is something others experienced as well, and that none of what happened was the survivor’s fault. Feelings of shame and blame come up over and over again in these texts, and seeing how terribly real people are affected by these feelings is horrible.
What I liked most about this title is that it is so unpretentious. Uttaro does not claim to have all the answers (he does not even claim this book could help all survivors). Instead he states that he has some opinions and ideas, he also has his own professional knowledge because of his work with survivors. He is aware that everybody has their own story, and there is no one-shoe-fits-all way to healing after experiencing sexual violence. And he emphasizes that his book cannot replace professional help in any form, and it is not meant to.
That being said, I found his book helpful, and it is actually written in a rather vivid style, which I also liked. Even the introduction shows the author’s deep understanding about the topic, and he shows this understanding throughout the book when he introduces situations and survivors who write about their experience. The reports feel real, they are raw and personal, most of them touched me deeply, and some of them were just too much, but this is not meant as criticism at all. This book is definitely worth reading, and I am glad that a title showing what rape and sexual violence really do to you exists, and this title will hopefully be read by many.
6 out of 5 stars
Trigger warning:
due to the reports of survivors there are definitely many lines in this book that can be triggering for survivors.
December 13, 2018
This was a hard book to read but a meaningful one. To The Survivors is different from other abuse books because it is not just the story of one person but of many including victims, victim’s friends and those who work with victims. The summary above is not just talking up the book it really is gentle, beautiful, tender, moving, sharp and piercing.
It’s rare to read a book about sexual abuse written by a man but I get the feeling that talking to him in person would put most abuse victims at ease, even women who were raped by men. He just has that aura about himself, so much so, that I can tell just by reading his writing.
There is nothing fancy about the layout of the book, the fonts or the paragraphs but I couldn’t stop reading the book although I had to read it in small spurts because of the upsetting material. It’s like the simple layout of the book is just perfect because it’s such a serious subject. It would seem like it was making light of the subject if it was flowery.
I definitely don’t recommend reading the book in large portions or just before bed. I always felt a little down after reading it but as long as I continued on to something different and engaging (TV for example) than it was fine. Although the book might make you down, it’s WORTH reading. There is nothing bad about the book and I think the book needs to get picked up by a publisher and spread around. Survivors NEED this book, families and friends NEED this book, anyone who works or wants to work with those abused NEED this book.
I’ve read lots about abuse and I know people who have been abused so I thought I had an idea of what abuse was like but I wasn’t prepared for some of these stories. I had never heard the sexual abuse explained with such feeling or hindsight. It moved me and it will move you.
I received this book in exchange for an honest review.
It’s rare to read a book about sexual abuse written by a man but I get the feeling that talking to him in person would put most abuse victims at ease, even women who were raped by men. He just has that aura about himself, so much so, that I can tell just by reading his writing.
There is nothing fancy about the layout of the book, the fonts or the paragraphs but I couldn’t stop reading the book although I had to read it in small spurts because of the upsetting material. It’s like the simple layout of the book is just perfect because it’s such a serious subject. It would seem like it was making light of the subject if it was flowery.
I definitely don’t recommend reading the book in large portions or just before bed. I always felt a little down after reading it but as long as I continued on to something different and engaging (TV for example) than it was fine. Although the book might make you down, it’s WORTH reading. There is nothing bad about the book and I think the book needs to get picked up by a publisher and spread around. Survivors NEED this book, families and friends NEED this book, anyone who works or wants to work with those abused NEED this book.
I’ve read lots about abuse and I know people who have been abused so I thought I had an idea of what abuse was like but I wasn’t prepared for some of these stories. I had never heard the sexual abuse explained with such feeling or hindsight. It moved me and it will move you.
I received this book in exchange for an honest review.
July 26, 2024
I received this book via Voracious Readers.
This book was triggering but in a good way in parts as it makes people realise the impact sexual violence/crimes can have on the victims and the lengths they can often go to avoid having to deal with the issue for fear of reprisal and the shame associated with it.
Unfortunately for me, it didn't come across that Mr Uttaro had a vocation or passion to get into the profession, but it came across an 'over the top', almost unhealthy desire/fixation on the subject matter. Almost like he got his kicks from wanting to be there and experience people's trauma. I know it may seem controversial and I'm hoping that it was just his writing style that failed him but it left me feeling extremely uncomfortable and very triggered.
I have no doubt that Mr Uttaro is one of the good guys and I'm sure had he been verbalising his reasons for wanting to be a good guy rather than writing them down it would have had the benefit of body language, pitch, tone of voice etc to go by. Unfortunately, I found it too overbearing, uncomfortable and dare I say I say it creepy which is such a shame as when he described the people and their experiences, I focused on their stories.
I have had to give only 2 stars due to the above despite the case studies and the immense knowledge Mr Uttaro had of the impact sexual assault has on people. I also couldn't get to the end of the book, again because Mr Uttaro made it all about himself. Sorry!
This book was triggering but in a good way in parts as it makes people realise the impact sexual violence/crimes can have on the victims and the lengths they can often go to avoid having to deal with the issue for fear of reprisal and the shame associated with it.
Unfortunately for me, it didn't come across that Mr Uttaro had a vocation or passion to get into the profession, but it came across an 'over the top', almost unhealthy desire/fixation on the subject matter. Almost like he got his kicks from wanting to be there and experience people's trauma. I know it may seem controversial and I'm hoping that it was just his writing style that failed him but it left me feeling extremely uncomfortable and very triggered.
I have no doubt that Mr Uttaro is one of the good guys and I'm sure had he been verbalising his reasons for wanting to be a good guy rather than writing them down it would have had the benefit of body language, pitch, tone of voice etc to go by. Unfortunately, I found it too overbearing, uncomfortable and dare I say I say it creepy which is such a shame as when he described the people and their experiences, I focused on their stories.
I have had to give only 2 stars due to the above despite the case studies and the immense knowledge Mr Uttaro had of the impact sexual assault has on people. I also couldn't get to the end of the book, again because Mr Uttaro made it all about himself. Sorry!
April 14, 2022
Beautiful and Inspiring while heart-wrenching at the same time!
For any survivor who feels alone, this author does an amazing job at helping you feel surrounded by people who understand and believe you! Told by an O & E volunteer for rape crisis center, Bobby helps survivors, family and friends of survivors and bring awareness and resources to them and communities he speaks in. Bobby also helps volunteer speakers to tell their stories in this book, so if hearing of sexual assault in graphic detail is triggering, you may need to read this with the help of someone you trust. Their stories are heartbreaking, but their messages are powerful! The way they have turned such a horrible experience into something to help other survivors is truly inspiring and beautiful to me! As a survivor myself, I've struggled with the aftermath for many years, and definitely had to read this slowly and carefully as to not trigger my PTSD and flashbacks. But I was so happy I did read it, because it helped me feel less alone and it felt as if I had people out there who know exactly how I feel and are fighting beside me. So for anyone who is able to, I'd definitely read this book if you're feeling alone as a survivor of sexual assault! This is a truly amazing book wrote by an extremely compassionate and empathetic author!
For any survivor who feels alone, this author does an amazing job at helping you feel surrounded by people who understand and believe you! Told by an O & E volunteer for rape crisis center, Bobby helps survivors, family and friends of survivors and bring awareness and resources to them and communities he speaks in. Bobby also helps volunteer speakers to tell their stories in this book, so if hearing of sexual assault in graphic detail is triggering, you may need to read this with the help of someone you trust. Their stories are heartbreaking, but their messages are powerful! The way they have turned such a horrible experience into something to help other survivors is truly inspiring and beautiful to me! As a survivor myself, I've struggled with the aftermath for many years, and definitely had to read this slowly and carefully as to not trigger my PTSD and flashbacks. But I was so happy I did read it, because it helped me feel less alone and it felt as if I had people out there who know exactly how I feel and are fighting beside me. So for anyone who is able to, I'd definitely read this book if you're feeling alone as a survivor of sexual assault! This is a truly amazing book wrote by an extremely compassionate and empathetic author!
March 31, 2019
"To the Survivors" by Robert Uttaro is an empowering and engaging memoir of a rape crisis councillor.
The clarity and sensitivity in Uttaro's writing style is unique. He has included interviews, poems, interviews with survivors, his own feelings and experiences as a councillor, as well as survivor's stories in their own words. His genuine depictions of real people are honest and unsentimental, allowing the people to exist as individuals.
There is a Christian religious tone throughout the book, but it is not preachy or posed as a necessity to healing, forgiving, or growing.
Uttaro has managed to create a book that will speak to everyone, without piles of impersonal statistics or drawn out judgement. The focus is on giving survivors a voice, as well as the survivor's loved ones. "To the Survivors" is in fact for everyone, as we all need to be aware of the impact that sexual abuse and violence has on our communities.
I was blessed to meet Robert Uttaro at the New England Authors Expo 2018 in Danvers, Massachusetts. His demeanor was gentle, and I immediately sensed his devotion to his cause.
The clarity and sensitivity in Uttaro's writing style is unique. He has included interviews, poems, interviews with survivors, his own feelings and experiences as a councillor, as well as survivor's stories in their own words. His genuine depictions of real people are honest and unsentimental, allowing the people to exist as individuals.
There is a Christian religious tone throughout the book, but it is not preachy or posed as a necessity to healing, forgiving, or growing.
Uttaro has managed to create a book that will speak to everyone, without piles of impersonal statistics or drawn out judgement. The focus is on giving survivors a voice, as well as the survivor's loved ones. "To the Survivors" is in fact for everyone, as we all need to be aware of the impact that sexual abuse and violence has on our communities.
I was blessed to meet Robert Uttaro at the New England Authors Expo 2018 in Danvers, Massachusetts. His demeanor was gentle, and I immediately sensed his devotion to his cause.
May 18, 2021
A great book that creates awareness about sexual assault. Indeed sexual assault is a serious issue that the world is facing but surprisingly there is very less coverage on it, be if from media or Internet. We are laced with technologies and living in a progressive state, but no one opens up when it is about rape or abuse or sex violence. People in India consider it as personal affair. They are timid to raise voice against the culprits, in fact in India every alternate woman has gone through violence and abuse pertaining to sex and molestation but they prefer to remain either silent or try solving secretly, because it brings social stigma to woman and her family members, while the culprit roams independently considering it a small misdemeanour.
To the Survivors by Robert Uttaro is heartbreaking work of non-fiction. The author shares his experience of working as a rape crises counselor with one institute. He introduces us to many of the victims who were sexually assaulted for various reasons in the various forms. The book talks about mental torture, rapes, molestation, and everything that gives pain to another human.
To the Survivors by Robert Uttaro is heartbreaking work of non-fiction. The author shares his experience of working as a rape crises counselor with one institute. He introduces us to many of the victims who were sexually assaulted for various reasons in the various forms. The book talks about mental torture, rapes, molestation, and everything that gives pain to another human.
October 8, 2024
All of the 5 star ratings are surprising to me, and I have a sense people give it that rating to honor the subject matter, but my review is for Uttaro, not those he interviewed.
Maybe it's because this was published before the #metoo era, but I found this hard to read, not because of the subject matter, but because I didn't find it that educational. Granted, I've been very fortunate in life to not have suffered the kind of sexual violence these survivors had, but I struggled to find any value in the author's narrative specifically. The stories he shared were heartbreaking and inspiring, and really those stories are the only parts that should have been in a book. His narrative is a self righteous and extremely out of touch at times. He should have titled this "I'm a rape counselor, and a good guy - here's some people I talk to".
And I feel very mean writing this review should the author read it, but if there was one takeaway I hope he reads, it's that in future editions or books he should leave his narrative out and just honor and support the survivors and their stories.
Maybe it's because this was published before the #metoo era, but I found this hard to read, not because of the subject matter, but because I didn't find it that educational. Granted, I've been very fortunate in life to not have suffered the kind of sexual violence these survivors had, but I struggled to find any value in the author's narrative specifically. The stories he shared were heartbreaking and inspiring, and really those stories are the only parts that should have been in a book. His narrative is a self righteous and extremely out of touch at times. He should have titled this "I'm a rape counselor, and a good guy - here's some people I talk to".
And I feel very mean writing this review should the author read it, but if there was one takeaway I hope he reads, it's that in future editions or books he should leave his narrative out and just honor and support the survivors and their stories.
July 7, 2018
Some heart wrenching stories
I received this book for free through Å·±¦ÓéÀÖ Giveaways. I thought this would be an interesting read from a male rape counselor who wasn't sexually abused, at least he didn't think so. The shared stories were sad,some intense & some pretty shocking. I have heard plenty of stories of victims not being believed by close family members & friends, but it still baffles my mind. I mean, even if there is doubt, wouldn't you want to make sure and find out if it's true instead of just ignoring it and carrying on as if you were never told? Anyway, I truly appreciated the authors compassion & dedication to these survivors young & old, male & female that he has counseled and towards the ones he interviewed in this book by giving them a platform to share their stories and letting other survivors know what options and resources are available to them.
I received this book for free through Å·±¦ÓéÀÖ Giveaways. I thought this would be an interesting read from a male rape counselor who wasn't sexually abused, at least he didn't think so. The shared stories were sad,some intense & some pretty shocking. I have heard plenty of stories of victims not being believed by close family members & friends, but it still baffles my mind. I mean, even if there is doubt, wouldn't you want to make sure and find out if it's true instead of just ignoring it and carrying on as if you were never told? Anyway, I truly appreciated the authors compassion & dedication to these survivors young & old, male & female that he has counseled and towards the ones he interviewed in this book by giving them a platform to share their stories and letting other survivors know what options and resources are available to them.
February 28, 2021
This book is about Robert Uttaro's journey as a rape crisis counselor and true stories of sexual violence shared by the survivors. The passion which the author has for helping others shines out in his book and I have much respect for him and the work he does.
His efforts to tirelessly help the victims of rape and to educate the public about sexual violence are truly commendable. This book would highly benefit people who work in crisis management centres and also counselors.
The manner in which the victims shared their stories truly displays their strength and resilience. The author's reason for becoming a counselor is admirable.
I would like to thank Robert Uttaro for the opportunity to read this book in exchange for a fair and honest review.
Summary: Easy to read and to understand Very enlightening and truly an eye-opener.
His efforts to tirelessly help the victims of rape and to educate the public about sexual violence are truly commendable. This book would highly benefit people who work in crisis management centres and also counselors.
The manner in which the victims shared their stories truly displays their strength and resilience. The author's reason for becoming a counselor is admirable.
I would like to thank Robert Uttaro for the opportunity to read this book in exchange for a fair and honest review.
Summary: Easy to read and to understand Very enlightening and truly an eye-opener.
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