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How to Let Things Go: 99 Tips from a Zen Buddhist Monk to Relinquish Control and Free Yourself Up for What Matters
Feeling overwhelmed? Step away from life's demands and free yourself up for what matters with this succinct and sensible guide by the Zen Buddhist author of the international bestsellers The Art of Simple Living and Don't Worry.
Amid the relentless cycle of news, social media, emails, and texts, it can be hard to know when, if ever, you can take a break from everything clamoring for your attention. The internationally bestselling Buddhist monk Shunmyo Masuno offers a radical You can leave it all be, and, indeed, sometimes the best thing you can learn is how to do nothing. How to Let Things Go will teach you to:
Lesson #2: Give people space¡ªbeing caring and being nosy are not the same thing.
Lesson #15: Remember that social media is a tool and nothing more.
Lesson #19: Let a relationship come to an end rather than force it.
Lesson #40: Think of letting things go not as throwing them away, but setting them free.
Lesson #75: Make decisions in the light of the morning¡ªdon't rush into them.
Lesson #90: Slow down and take more breaks.
With these and ninety-three other practical tips, you can abandon the futile pursuit of controlling everything in your life and discover the key to a fulfilling social life, individual well-being, and a calmer, more focused mind.
Amid the relentless cycle of news, social media, emails, and texts, it can be hard to know when, if ever, you can take a break from everything clamoring for your attention. The internationally bestselling Buddhist monk Shunmyo Masuno offers a radical You can leave it all be, and, indeed, sometimes the best thing you can learn is how to do nothing. How to Let Things Go will teach you to:
Lesson #2: Give people space¡ªbeing caring and being nosy are not the same thing.
Lesson #15: Remember that social media is a tool and nothing more.
Lesson #19: Let a relationship come to an end rather than force it.
Lesson #40: Think of letting things go not as throwing them away, but setting them free.
Lesson #75: Make decisions in the light of the morning¡ªdon't rush into them.
Lesson #90: Slow down and take more breaks.
With these and ninety-three other practical tips, you can abandon the futile pursuit of controlling everything in your life and discover the key to a fulfilling social life, individual well-being, and a calmer, more focused mind.
224 pages, Hardcover
First published May 17, 2021
350 people are currently reading
9,148 people want to read
About the author
Shunmy¨ Masuno
91?books236?followersSee also£º–™Ò° ¿¡Ã÷(´³²¹±è²¹²Ô±ð²õ±ð)¡¢–™Ò°¿¡Ã÷(Chinese)
Shunmy¨ Masuno is a Japanese monk and garden designer. He is chief priest of the S¨t¨ Zen temple Kenk¨-ji, professor at Tama Art University, and president of a design firm that has completed numerous projects in Japan and overseas. He has been called "Japan's leading garden designer".
Shunmy¨ Masuno is a Japanese monk and garden designer. He is chief priest of the S¨t¨ Zen temple Kenk¨-ji, professor at Tama Art University, and president of a design firm that has completed numerous projects in Japan and overseas. He has been called "Japan's leading garden designer".
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 153 reviews
November 24, 2024
¡°How to Let Things Go¡± by Shunmyo Masuno offered a few decent reminders about mindfulness and simplifying life, but much of the advice felt overly simplistic and clich¨¦. The concepts, while rooted in Zen philosophy, lacked depth and often came across as surface-level affirmations rather than actionable insights. Readers already familiar with self-help or mindfulness literature might find the ideas repetitive. Though the book has a calming tone, it doesn¡¯t provide enough fresh perspective to make it truly impactful.
November 17, 2024
?? I like a couple of things in this book! I¡¯ma let it marinate for a while then get back to this review¡
December 11, 2024
This book is structured into five parts, offering a total of 99 valuable tips. For the purpose of this discussion, I will focus on the section that resonates with me the most and share its insights with readers.
Letting go can be a challenging but liberating process. It involves releasing emotional attachments to situations, people, or outcomes that no longer serve your well-being. This books give you 99 tips to relinquish control and free yourself up for what matters that might help:
In PART TWO, we will learn about ¡®Dont Worry About Every Little Thing. Letting go of anxiety, impatience, and anger is a gradual process that involves self-awareness, intentional actions, and sometimes professional guidance.
Firstly, we must reframe our mindset
When negative thoughts arise, question them. Are they realistic or exaggerated? After that, focusing on what¡¯s good in your life can shift your perspective by practising gratitude.
Try to adopt mindfulness practices like engage fully in simple activities, like eating or walking, to break the cycle of overthinking. Let go of control such as recognize what¡¯s beyond your control and focus on what you can influence.
Other than that, trying to practice compassion.
Firstly, for yourself- Be kind to yourself when you slip up. For others too- Try to understand others' actions without taking them personally.
?Acknowledge Your Feelings.
Accept how you feel without judgment. Suppressing emotions often prolongs the process of letting go. Journaling or talking to someone you trust can help you process your emotions.
?Set Boundaries
If you¡¯re letting go of a toxic relationship or habit, establish clear boundaries to protect your progress. Setting boundaries is an essential part of maintaining your emotional well-being and protecting your mental space.
?Know Your Limits
Reflect on what feels comfortable and what doesn¡¯t in your relationships, work, and personal life. Identify situations where you feel overextended, resentful, or drained.
?Learn to Say No
Saying ¡°no¡± is not selfish; it¡¯s self-care. Practice saying it respectfully but firmly without guilt. For example: "I¡¯m sorry, I can¡¯t help with that right now."
?Recognize Toxic Patterns
If someone continuously disrespects your boundaries, reevaluate their role in your life. You may need to distance yourself for your own well-being.
Letting go can be a challenging but liberating process. It involves releasing emotional attachments to situations, people, or outcomes that no longer serve your well-being. This books give you 99 tips to relinquish control and free yourself up for what matters that might help:
In PART TWO, we will learn about ¡®Dont Worry About Every Little Thing. Letting go of anxiety, impatience, and anger is a gradual process that involves self-awareness, intentional actions, and sometimes professional guidance.
Firstly, we must reframe our mindset
When negative thoughts arise, question them. Are they realistic or exaggerated? After that, focusing on what¡¯s good in your life can shift your perspective by practising gratitude.
Try to adopt mindfulness practices like engage fully in simple activities, like eating or walking, to break the cycle of overthinking. Let go of control such as recognize what¡¯s beyond your control and focus on what you can influence.
Other than that, trying to practice compassion.
Firstly, for yourself- Be kind to yourself when you slip up. For others too- Try to understand others' actions without taking them personally.
?Acknowledge Your Feelings.
Accept how you feel without judgment. Suppressing emotions often prolongs the process of letting go. Journaling or talking to someone you trust can help you process your emotions.
?Set Boundaries
If you¡¯re letting go of a toxic relationship or habit, establish clear boundaries to protect your progress. Setting boundaries is an essential part of maintaining your emotional well-being and protecting your mental space.
?Know Your Limits
Reflect on what feels comfortable and what doesn¡¯t in your relationships, work, and personal life. Identify situations where you feel overextended, resentful, or drained.
?Learn to Say No
Saying ¡°no¡± is not selfish; it¡¯s self-care. Practice saying it respectfully but firmly without guilt. For example: "I¡¯m sorry, I can¡¯t help with that right now."
?Recognize Toxic Patterns
If someone continuously disrespects your boundaries, reevaluate their role in your life. You may need to distance yourself for your own well-being.
February 8, 2025
Do your best and leave the rest!!!
Sooo many good takeaways here. I loved that the book embodies the minimalism it talks about; each tip is allocated just two pages: a quote and then an explanation. Made this an easily digestible yet impactful read.
? Instead of comparing yourself to others, compare your current self to your best self
? Know when to leave; the ideal time is when you are at your height because 'up' times do not last forever
? Not all information is useful or needed, learn to block them out
? Hoarding stuff and not utilising them is as good as being wasteful aka what you were trying to avoid by not throwing them out in the first place
? What you make out of your choice is more important than the choices themselves
?? cherreading mood: My book club pick and I had fun sharing the takeaways.
Sooo many good takeaways here. I loved that the book embodies the minimalism it talks about; each tip is allocated just two pages: a quote and then an explanation. Made this an easily digestible yet impactful read.
? Instead of comparing yourself to others, compare your current self to your best self
? Know when to leave; the ideal time is when you are at your height because 'up' times do not last forever
? Not all information is useful or needed, learn to block them out
? Hoarding stuff and not utilising them is as good as being wasteful aka what you were trying to avoid by not throwing them out in the first place
? What you make out of your choice is more important than the choices themselves
?? cherreading mood: My book club pick and I had fun sharing the takeaways.
January 19, 2025
Some but not all resonated with me. Maybe better to pick up every once in a while in a moment of need rather than read in one sitting.
April 8, 2025
I'm afraid this failed to hold my interest and therefore I gleaned very little helpful information from it. The suggestions seemed very simplistic and lacking in any depth.
This book might be better to keep on one's night stand to read a chapter or two a night, rather than to read it straight through as I did.
This book might be better to keep on one's night stand to read a chapter or two a night, rather than to read it straight through as I did.
April 21, 2025
may a life where i need some of this advice never find me??
some especially questionable opinions given include, but are not limited to:
- if your husband doesn¡¯t clean up after himself, despite you asking him repeatedly to, it¡¯s your fault for expecting him to change
- that sexual harassment is the result of being ¡°too involved¡± in your workplace
- that you should be lucky for people to know 30-40% of you
- that if someone is going through a tough time, it¡¯s better to not reach out and instead leave them alone
honorable mention: the numerous mentions of ¡°arch nemeses¡± and ¡°adversaries¡±? who are yall hanging out with???
some especially questionable opinions given include, but are not limited to:
- if your husband doesn¡¯t clean up after himself, despite you asking him repeatedly to, it¡¯s your fault for expecting him to change
- that sexual harassment is the result of being ¡°too involved¡± in your workplace
- that you should be lucky for people to know 30-40% of you
- that if someone is going through a tough time, it¡¯s better to not reach out and instead leave them alone
honorable mention: the numerous mentions of ¡°arch nemeses¡± and ¡°adversaries¡±? who are yall hanging out with???
January 28, 2025
Shunmy¨ Masuno is a Japanese Buddhist monk, professor at Tama Art University, and leader of a design firm specializing in gardening design. He has published several nonfiction books on the topic of Zen Buddhism, with 2021's How to Let Things Go being the latest addition. This book is quite short (the audiobook version was only 3 hours long) and consists of 99 tips that each have around a paragraph of explanation about them; most felt like cliches and were covered too superficially to be particularly insightful. Overall, this is the type of book that probably shouldn't have an audiobook edition or be digested in one sitting; those with Ebook or physical copies who can read and reflect on a few tips at a time will probably have a more meaningful experience than I did listening to this quickly.
My statistics:
Book 31 for 2025
Book 1957 cumulatively
My statistics:
Book 31 for 2025
Book 1957 cumulatively
January 2, 2025
Some great tips and perspectives on how to lighten your mental state. The format of the book was easy to digest. I didn¡¯t agree with everything but felt overall this book was a nice reminder of how to let things go as we enter a new year.
December 6, 2024
This doesn't really tell you "how to" so much as "why you shouldn't feel the way you do," which in my experience is never useful and only shames a person.
December 19, 2024
I¡¯m famously a self-help book hater, and yet again, I have read one in hopes to be changed. Unfortunately, we still in the clurb.
Firstly I will say, I did actually enjoy this authors points on allowing yourself to not be as transparent as most people think they have to be. He notes that a good basis for how open you should be to people is around 50%, and honestly I can see areas of my life that would benefit from these notions. However, I do also believe that people should be allowed to feel as comfortable as they want to, around who they want to. And if 50% of their truth isn¡¯t enough, they should never be shamed for sharing more. I did also love the authors point about indecisiveness, and how we waste so much time worrying about choosing the wrong path, when no matter what we chose, our end results will always be the same, and what¡¯s destined to happen will happen no matter what. In that area the authors beliefs do match my own. The issue I feel I have with self help books though, is that you cannot try and force people to believe the same way as you. Our beliefs shouldn¡¯t be profited off of, and if they were true beliefs, you¡¯d gain enough comfort just from knowing your truth. I¡¯m so tired of people feeling like they need to be a god pointing the way for other people who live lives that are nothing like theirs. So I fear that no matter how many opinions I agree with in these kinds books, I just will never fully respect anyone with an ego big enough to write a book, manipulating other people into following them.
Firstly I will say, I did actually enjoy this authors points on allowing yourself to not be as transparent as most people think they have to be. He notes that a good basis for how open you should be to people is around 50%, and honestly I can see areas of my life that would benefit from these notions. However, I do also believe that people should be allowed to feel as comfortable as they want to, around who they want to. And if 50% of their truth isn¡¯t enough, they should never be shamed for sharing more. I did also love the authors point about indecisiveness, and how we waste so much time worrying about choosing the wrong path, when no matter what we chose, our end results will always be the same, and what¡¯s destined to happen will happen no matter what. In that area the authors beliefs do match my own. The issue I feel I have with self help books though, is that you cannot try and force people to believe the same way as you. Our beliefs shouldn¡¯t be profited off of, and if they were true beliefs, you¡¯d gain enough comfort just from knowing your truth. I¡¯m so tired of people feeling like they need to be a god pointing the way for other people who live lives that are nothing like theirs. So I fear that no matter how many opinions I agree with in these kinds books, I just will never fully respect anyone with an ego big enough to write a book, manipulating other people into following them.
February 22, 2025
Thoughts on How to Let Things Go by Shunmy¨ Masuno:
1. Reading this book is like sitting down with a Zen Buddhist monk and receiving advice on how to live life well. It can feel a tad moralising, albeit well-intentioned.
2. The usefulness of the 99 tips dispensed depends on the reader¡¯s receptiveness, memory (?), and subsequent willingness to inculcate the said tips!
3. Because the tips are written in a very succinct manner, don¡¯t expect in-depth advice. They are mostly cursory and gentle reminders.
4. Not sure if it¡¯s this book or it¡¯s just me, but I think I¡¯ve come to an age where I feel self-help books like these are not as helpful as they were to me before¡ªwhich I hope is good thing! After all, the title of this book is How to Let Things Go! ?
1. Reading this book is like sitting down with a Zen Buddhist monk and receiving advice on how to live life well. It can feel a tad moralising, albeit well-intentioned.
2. The usefulness of the 99 tips dispensed depends on the reader¡¯s receptiveness, memory (?), and subsequent willingness to inculcate the said tips!
3. Because the tips are written in a very succinct manner, don¡¯t expect in-depth advice. They are mostly cursory and gentle reminders.
4. Not sure if it¡¯s this book or it¡¯s just me, but I think I¡¯ve come to an age where I feel self-help books like these are not as helpful as they were to me before¡ªwhich I hope is good thing! After all, the title of this book is How to Let Things Go! ?
April 14, 2025
Good primer for understanding some of the basics of Buddhism in practical ways. Quick, quick read. It's like 99 headlines for how to be a Buddhist and the opening paragraph for each one.
December 20, 2024
Overall it was the book version of listening to a strange friend give mostly unhelpful advice for an hour or two. I knew there was a strong chance of it not having concrete action items but I at least hoped for a bit more thought provoking points made. Instead it was just a lot of little soundbites that didn't always seem to fully reach a point and occasionally went counter to my own beliefs (I understand the importance of being "detached in your relationships" in some senses, but his suggestions were a little extreme if you want to have any kind of close relationships beyond yourself in my opinion - I'd consider some of my relationships to be the "what matters" that I'm trying to free myself up for).
I was especially taken aback by the moment where I felt like maybe things were going to get into some practical advice ("Dispose of things you don't use"). He started by giving detail about how to sort things you don't use into three piles. I felt like we were really getting somewhere and maybe I should be taking notes. He then gave direction for what to do with the first pile, then direction about what to do with the second pile, then the chapter ended. Next chapter - back to what to do with the first pile. End of section, now on to being measured in your reactions. Umm, dude, what am I meant to be doing with this third pile?
Anyway, it's a page turner in the fact that half the pages are just giant font and the other half aren't always full either, but if I could go back in time I'd skip it.
I was especially taken aback by the moment where I felt like maybe things were going to get into some practical advice ("Dispose of things you don't use"). He started by giving detail about how to sort things you don't use into three piles. I felt like we were really getting somewhere and maybe I should be taking notes. He then gave direction for what to do with the first pile, then direction about what to do with the second pile, then the chapter ended. Next chapter - back to what to do with the first pile. End of section, now on to being measured in your reactions. Umm, dude, what am I meant to be doing with this third pile?
Anyway, it's a page turner in the fact that half the pages are just giant font and the other half aren't always full either, but if I could go back in time I'd skip it.
January 4, 2025
Small nuggets of useful life advice.
February 19, 2025
Dnf. Couldn't connect with it so I took the main advice.
February 10, 2025
While a few tips really resonated and gave food for thought, most of the tips were just common sense. Also many of the tips were geared towards work and professional life which I hadn¡¯t expected.
December 21, 2024
I badly needed to read this, so much so I read it twice ? Shunmyo Masuno, Japanese monk, garden designer, head priest of a 450-year-old temple and university professor is back with a new book, How To Let Things Go. Rooted in Zen Buddhism,?the book provides 99 stoic affirmations for daily life. Here are some of my favourites:
* Those who have the power to let things go are not at the mercy of their personal relationships.?
* Changing others is impossible. The only person you have control over is yourself. It may be that the only time you get what you want is when it has to do with yourself.
* Lately there seems to be a noticeable increase in people desperately wanting others to know everything about them. One sign of this is a need to post every detail of their lives on social media. Another version is people with social media friends the majority of whom they never met who relentlessly post and respond to one another about everything they're doing. I don't mean to discourage such earnest feelings but no one will ever understand everything about you. You will never completely know your friends either. Realistically you can consider yourself lucky if you have a few friends with whom we share about half of what there is to know about one another you should be grateful for even a 30 or 40% connection. Close relationships with a vast number of people and the desire for one in and of itself is a delusion.?
* I can't help but think that ever since we've entered this age of the smartphone we've become averse to loneliness. Perhaps we have grown accustomed to constant contact with others chatting with them as if they were by our sides but it seems as though we can no longer bear to spend time on our own. Since ancient times, Japanese people have regarded a quiet life alone surrounded by abundance of nature as the height of luxury. We ought to strive for the awareness and introspection that alone time provides and there is a luxury that fosters a better way of life.
* Human connection cannot be manipulated. It's more like a natural twist of fate. So in that spirit, "Do not pursue those who leave, do not turn away those who come to you".
* Those who have the power to let things go are not at the mercy of their personal relationships.?
* Changing others is impossible. The only person you have control over is yourself. It may be that the only time you get what you want is when it has to do with yourself.
* Lately there seems to be a noticeable increase in people desperately wanting others to know everything about them. One sign of this is a need to post every detail of their lives on social media. Another version is people with social media friends the majority of whom they never met who relentlessly post and respond to one another about everything they're doing. I don't mean to discourage such earnest feelings but no one will ever understand everything about you. You will never completely know your friends either. Realistically you can consider yourself lucky if you have a few friends with whom we share about half of what there is to know about one another you should be grateful for even a 30 or 40% connection. Close relationships with a vast number of people and the desire for one in and of itself is a delusion.?
* I can't help but think that ever since we've entered this age of the smartphone we've become averse to loneliness. Perhaps we have grown accustomed to constant contact with others chatting with them as if they were by our sides but it seems as though we can no longer bear to spend time on our own. Since ancient times, Japanese people have regarded a quiet life alone surrounded by abundance of nature as the height of luxury. We ought to strive for the awareness and introspection that alone time provides and there is a luxury that fosters a better way of life.
* Human connection cannot be manipulated. It's more like a natural twist of fate. So in that spirit, "Do not pursue those who leave, do not turn away those who come to you".
April 8, 2025
3.5/5
An idyllic, idealistic, simplistic, somewhat actionable list of dos and donts for our shit storm we find ourselves in. Not all of it realistic though. Mostly nice, however. What a time to suck air on this rock. Did I mention I'm chewing twice daily stress gummies now, too? Yeah. I am. Ashwaganda root. That's where we are. No drugs or alcohol for tHiS gUy iN tHe OrwElLiAn ApoCalyPsE! #April2025
An idyllic, idealistic, simplistic, somewhat actionable list of dos and donts for our shit storm we find ourselves in. Not all of it realistic though. Mostly nice, however. What a time to suck air on this rock. Did I mention I'm chewing twice daily stress gummies now, too? Yeah. I am. Ashwaganda root. That's where we are. No drugs or alcohol for tHiS gUy iN tHe OrwElLiAn ApoCalyPsE! #April2025
January 1, 2025
I was looking for a quick quick and inspirational book to finish out the year and this was the perfect find. Actually listen to it but just ordered the hard copy of it because I think it¡¯s a book I would refer back to.
November 28, 2024
3.5 stars. Little pieces of advice for life.
December 27, 2024
Much needed after the last couple of months!
99 reminded me of what my father always told me ¡°Do your best and let Allah take care of the rest¡± <3
99 reminded me of what my father always told me ¡°Do your best and let Allah take care of the rest¡± <3
January 9, 2025
Simple but gentle reminders. Surprisingly very modern
March 26, 2025
Definitely meant for people in the corporate world. I¡¯ll be keeping fragments of this in mind, but it¡¯s a list format that keeps concepts very simple (oversimplified, maybe¡)
April 10, 2025
As an audiobook, I don't think this works. The narrator is lovely and has a calming voice but it's a list of Don't don't don't....
April 15, 2025
a short, bedside table book for quick reminders of common sense type info
February 14, 2025
A beautiful little book with so much wisdom!
December 22, 2024
This short book of 99 tips means well but I felt the tips could have been more practical and have more depth - everyone strives for mindfulness and to limit anxiety but one tip here says 'do less' and then a later tip says 'do more' so there was a bit of doublespeak. This is very basic self help. I didn¡¯t find it enlightening.
February 4, 2025
*audiobook*
Be humble, be humble, be humble
Be humble, be humble, be humble
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