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Girl Defined: God's Radical Design for Beauty, Femininity, and Identity
In a Culture of Distortions, Discover God-Defined Womanhood and Beauty
In a culture where airbrushed models and career-driven women define beauty and success, it's no wonder we have a distorted view of femininity. Our impossible standards place an incredible burden of stress on the backs of women and girls of all ages, resulting in anxiety, eating disorders, and depression. One question we often forget to ask is this: What is God's design for womanhood?
In Girl Defined, sisters and popular bloggers Kristen Clark and Bethany Baird offer women a countercultural view of beauty, femininity, and self-worth. Based firmly in God's design for their lives, this book helps women rethink what true success and beauty look like. It invites them on a liberating journey toward a radically better vision for femininity that ends with the discovery of the kind of hope, purpose, and fulfillment they've been yearning for.
Girl Defined helps readers
- discover God's design for femininity and his definition of a successful woman
- uncover the secrets of lasting worth, purpose, and fulfillment
- be equipped and empowered to live out a radically better vision for womanhood
- gain personal insight through the chapter-by-chapter study guide
In a culture where airbrushed models and career-driven women define beauty and success, it's no wonder we have a distorted view of femininity. Our impossible standards place an incredible burden of stress on the backs of women and girls of all ages, resulting in anxiety, eating disorders, and depression. One question we often forget to ask is this: What is God's design for womanhood?
In Girl Defined, sisters and popular bloggers Kristen Clark and Bethany Baird offer women a countercultural view of beauty, femininity, and self-worth. Based firmly in God's design for their lives, this book helps women rethink what true success and beauty look like. It invites them on a liberating journey toward a radically better vision for femininity that ends with the discovery of the kind of hope, purpose, and fulfillment they've been yearning for.
Girl Defined helps readers
- discover God's design for femininity and his definition of a successful woman
- uncover the secrets of lasting worth, purpose, and fulfillment
- be equipped and empowered to live out a radically better vision for womanhood
- gain personal insight through the chapter-by-chapter study guide
240 pages, Paperback
First published May 1, 2016
195 people are currently reading
1,382 people want to read
About the author
Kristen Clark
10Ìýbooks205ÌýfollowersKristen Clark is married to her high school sweetheart, Zack, and has a background in Biblical counseling, young women's ministry, teen mentoring, online blogging, and is the co-founder of GirlDefined Ministries. She and her sister, Bethany, are passionate about fighting feminism, embracing gender distinctions, and empowering young women to live out their God defined purpose. You can read her weekly blog posts at girldefined.com or follow her on Facebook at .
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 206 reviews
July 26, 2017
Patriarchy with a 2016 facelift to oppress a whole new generation of women. Sad.
February 20, 2019
This is problematic, toxic, judgmental, hypocritical, dangerous, preach-y and overall a painful read.
It was kinda like a car crash: it’s disturbing and horrible but you just can’t stop looking.
I get I’m not the target audience for this book, but I was curious, so leave me alone.
As an actual book, it was okay, but the format could use some work. The first person and subsequent clarifications were annoying at best.
It was kinda like a car crash: it’s disturbing and horrible but you just can’t stop looking.
I get I’m not the target audience for this book, but I was curious, so leave me alone.
As an actual book, it was okay, but the format could use some work. The first person and subsequent clarifications were annoying at best.
January 30, 2019
This was a crack read, I just had morbid curiosity about what they were saying in their books after watching so many YouTube videos on them. But I do have a legit complaint outside of their problematic and harmful views for society. They constantly use their names in parenthesis because they write in the first person. It’s really bad form. I would have preferred a header like Bethany in bold before her segment instead of “I (Bethany) was going to the store� sometimes it wasn’t even necessary like I knew they were talking about themselves which made it more annoying. So there, some legit writing criticism.
June 11, 2019
This book wanted to change me as a woman and it has succeeded: I am now a woman who writes reviews and this book is awful! There is so much wrong with this book and the message it spreads - this is not to say I believe everybody should renounce their faith and religion, but they should renounce whatever crap these two are spewing. This book is misogynistic, toxic and tone deaf. I would say that some of its content was laughable, but honestly, it's more frightening to think that individuals can still hold such warped views of gender.
April 13, 2019
read this in my personal study of fundamentalist Christianity pretty problematic and ridiculous
April 5, 2018
Girl Defined: God's Radical Design for Beauty, Femininity, and Identity by Kristen Clark and Bethany Baird is a book I think every woman (teen+) can benefit from reading! For one, it's very easy and enjoyable to read - I continually wanted to return to its pages. And it truly speaks to the heart! Girl Defined explores issues we as women are facing everyday, and gives Biblical advice, eye-opening truths, and encouraging/challenging stories.
It speaks to younger girls (around teen years) as well as married women, or even middle-age/older woman. There are stories about teens, young moms, 30-year-old singles, and older widows. I can't wait to share this book with my younger sisters (14 and 16)! I loved it! Girl Defined speaks to WOMEN and calls for us to find our identity in Christ and embrace God's plan for womanhood.
As with every Christian Living/Self-Help book I read, I didn't agree with absolutely everything said in Girl Defined ... word for word. Some things I thought, "Well, I wouldn't exactly say it that way."
But this book really hits the nail on the head when talking about Biblical womanhood. Sisters Kristen and Bethany have the Word of God, life experience, statistics, and well-known Christian speakers/writers (such as Nancy Demoss Wolgemuth, Dannah Gresh, and Mary A. Kassian) to back up what they're teaching.
So many things clicked for me when reading this book. It just makes sense, what they're saying. Even if it is TOTALLY against the cultural norm, totally against what the world tells us to do/be ... when you read about femininity, beauty, and identity the way Kristen and Bethany see it, it makes sense when you think about how God designed us. Men and women were created to be equal, but different, for specific purposes. This book embraces that, and I LOVE it! Ladies, we are going to be so much happier and fulfilled if we embrace GOD'S DESIGN! If we embrace femininity. If we embrace womanhood and the "nurturing", "helping", and "life-giving" that comes with that role.
Girl Defined also talks about living purposefully, with eternity in mind, which is a message for ALL Christians, no matter where you are in life. It was both challenging and encouraging! Exciting, even! ^_^ Let's live, my friends! Let's live a life that we can look back on and not regret. A life of fulfillment. A life of honoring God.
I really liked how Kristen and Bethany quote authors like Nancy Demoss Wolgemuth in this book. They have such powerful things to say! One of my favorites from Mrs. Wolgemuth is: "Being created "for someone" indicates that God created the female to be a highly relational creature. In contrast to the male, her identity isn't based on work nearly as much as on how well she connects and relates to others. Forming deep relational bonds is at the core of what it means to be a woman." (pg. 91)
And from Mary A. Kassian: "A wimpy woman gives up on biblical femininity when life gets hard. A wimpy woman quits when she has to stand alone. A wimpy woman caves in when the culture pressures her." (pg. 169)
They also share thoughts from some of the past top models in the industry, such as Kylie Bisutti. She say that models are some of the most insecure women she's ever met! Have you ever thought about that? We simply cannot place our identity in our outward appearance, because we'll never measure up.
Yes. Overall, I feel Girl Defined is full of Biblical truth and has the potential to make a big impact on women today. I want to share this book with all the women I know - young and old! It reminds us of our beautiful identity, purpose, and femininity. This is so much more freeing than what the culture is telling us! So priceless! I would strongly encourage you to read Girl Defined: God's Radical Design for Beauty, Femininity, and Identity, women! *smiles*
Find Kristen Clark and Bethany Baird on their Youtube channel: and their website:
It speaks to younger girls (around teen years) as well as married women, or even middle-age/older woman. There are stories about teens, young moms, 30-year-old singles, and older widows. I can't wait to share this book with my younger sisters (14 and 16)! I loved it! Girl Defined speaks to WOMEN and calls for us to find our identity in Christ and embrace God's plan for womanhood.
As with every Christian Living/Self-Help book I read, I didn't agree with absolutely everything said in Girl Defined ... word for word. Some things I thought, "Well, I wouldn't exactly say it that way."
But this book really hits the nail on the head when talking about Biblical womanhood. Sisters Kristen and Bethany have the Word of God, life experience, statistics, and well-known Christian speakers/writers (such as Nancy Demoss Wolgemuth, Dannah Gresh, and Mary A. Kassian) to back up what they're teaching.
So many things clicked for me when reading this book. It just makes sense, what they're saying. Even if it is TOTALLY against the cultural norm, totally against what the world tells us to do/be ... when you read about femininity, beauty, and identity the way Kristen and Bethany see it, it makes sense when you think about how God designed us. Men and women were created to be equal, but different, for specific purposes. This book embraces that, and I LOVE it! Ladies, we are going to be so much happier and fulfilled if we embrace GOD'S DESIGN! If we embrace femininity. If we embrace womanhood and the "nurturing", "helping", and "life-giving" that comes with that role.
Girl Defined also talks about living purposefully, with eternity in mind, which is a message for ALL Christians, no matter where you are in life. It was both challenging and encouraging! Exciting, even! ^_^ Let's live, my friends! Let's live a life that we can look back on and not regret. A life of fulfillment. A life of honoring God.
I really liked how Kristen and Bethany quote authors like Nancy Demoss Wolgemuth in this book. They have such powerful things to say! One of my favorites from Mrs. Wolgemuth is: "Being created "for someone" indicates that God created the female to be a highly relational creature. In contrast to the male, her identity isn't based on work nearly as much as on how well she connects and relates to others. Forming deep relational bonds is at the core of what it means to be a woman." (pg. 91)
And from Mary A. Kassian: "A wimpy woman gives up on biblical femininity when life gets hard. A wimpy woman quits when she has to stand alone. A wimpy woman caves in when the culture pressures her." (pg. 169)
They also share thoughts from some of the past top models in the industry, such as Kylie Bisutti. She say that models are some of the most insecure women she's ever met! Have you ever thought about that? We simply cannot place our identity in our outward appearance, because we'll never measure up.
Yes. Overall, I feel Girl Defined is full of Biblical truth and has the potential to make a big impact on women today. I want to share this book with all the women I know - young and old! It reminds us of our beautiful identity, purpose, and femininity. This is so much more freeing than what the culture is telling us! So priceless! I would strongly encourage you to read Girl Defined: God's Radical Design for Beauty, Femininity, and Identity, women! *smiles*
Find Kristen Clark and Bethany Baird on their Youtube channel: and their website:
June 6, 2019
My take-away: "We're uncomfortable with our culture's impossible checklist for women, so we want everyone to confirm to God's impossible checklist instead!"
I'm no longer a Christian, but I like to think even if I had remained in faith I wouldn't heed this book's skewed view of femininity. It would sadden me to raise a daughter who grew up believing she needed to put her own dreams to the side because God uniformly calls women to be wives (or wifelike to the men in their lives) and mothers (or nurturing to the men in their lives) - and make no mistake, this attitude is all about lifting up men. Why on earth would God place the desire to work hard and change the world in a woman's heart as a test of her loyalty to him? That's the most disturbing thing about this book to me, the number of girls and women being discouraged from pursuing their passions and making a much-needed difference in the world.
Also, the idea that most women have the option of declining the option to work full-time is laughable. It's amazing and terrific for these sisters that they've managed to sustain this ministry as their career, but many of us have to get up, take our kids to school, and go to work every day in order to put food in their mouths. How awful to imply that working moms are abandoning their children, and that women who follow their dreams are living a life that's somehow lesser.
I'm no longer a Christian, but I like to think even if I had remained in faith I wouldn't heed this book's skewed view of femininity. It would sadden me to raise a daughter who grew up believing she needed to put her own dreams to the side because God uniformly calls women to be wives (or wifelike to the men in their lives) and mothers (or nurturing to the men in their lives) - and make no mistake, this attitude is all about lifting up men. Why on earth would God place the desire to work hard and change the world in a woman's heart as a test of her loyalty to him? That's the most disturbing thing about this book to me, the number of girls and women being discouraged from pursuing their passions and making a much-needed difference in the world.
Also, the idea that most women have the option of declining the option to work full-time is laughable. It's amazing and terrific for these sisters that they've managed to sustain this ministry as their career, but many of us have to get up, take our kids to school, and go to work every day in order to put food in their mouths. How awful to imply that working moms are abandoning their children, and that women who follow their dreams are living a life that's somehow lesser.
May 21, 2016
I started this book at 9:30PM, took a 45 minute break around 10:30PM, and finished the last page around 1AM. It's an easy to read, engaging format well worth the un-intimidating time investment. I'm hoping to gift my copy to a young woman who will be able to benefit from the inspiration and practical advice.
One of my favorite things about Girl Defined is that it steers clear of the romance advice that fills most non-fiction for young, Christian women. The sister authors want to present an inspiring picture of Biblical womanhood that is not bound to a season of singleness or marriage. That was refreshing to me.
Another aspect I appreciated was that this isn't a book of do's and don'ts. The sisters don't say, "Here's what the Bible says, and here's our checklist of rules that will make sure you fulfill what the Bible says." Instead, they challenge readers to examine there own hearts. They encourage girls to step away from the book, pray, compare their attitudes to what the Bible says, and make behavior adjustments accordingly.
In summary, I found this book grounding and encouraging if not revolutionary. The concepts are ones I'm well familiar with, but I don't regret the hours I spent reading Girl Defined. A fresh reminder and new angle of perspective are always worthwhile.
One of my favorite things about Girl Defined is that it steers clear of the romance advice that fills most non-fiction for young, Christian women. The sister authors want to present an inspiring picture of Biblical womanhood that is not bound to a season of singleness or marriage. That was refreshing to me.
Another aspect I appreciated was that this isn't a book of do's and don'ts. The sisters don't say, "Here's what the Bible says, and here's our checklist of rules that will make sure you fulfill what the Bible says." Instead, they challenge readers to examine there own hearts. They encourage girls to step away from the book, pray, compare their attitudes to what the Bible says, and make behavior adjustments accordingly.
In summary, I found this book grounding and encouraging if not revolutionary. The concepts are ones I'm well familiar with, but I don't regret the hours I spent reading Girl Defined. A fresh reminder and new angle of perspective are always worthwhile.
July 2, 2020
As a very devout Christian, may I sincerely say: Girl Defined doesn't know what the heck they're doing.
January 13, 2020
as a Christian, I feel very confused about this book. I represent a more liberal view of the Christian faith (you know, not sending people to an eternity of hell for having premarital sex or banning abortion in cases of rape or incest). I will also most likely end up marrying a woman, so that made me even more reserved knowing Girl Defined's opinion on homosexuality.
I don't think Kristen and Bethany are bad people. In fact, I believe they are good people trying to spread a message that they believe is going to save people. The one thing I loved was how they made it clear that your value doesn't come from good looks or career. Amen!
But oh boy, are they doing this wrong. I wouldn't want my (possible) future daughters reading this- don't think it would benefit them in any way, no matter if they were Christian or not.
Why are some Christians so focused on being perfect or living their lives in one exact way, when even the Bible has such a huge variety of different Godly examples on how to be a man or a woman? Misogyny with a very thin veil of God's will. Or, at least, what Kristen and Bethany think that is.
I don't think Kristen and Bethany are bad people. In fact, I believe they are good people trying to spread a message that they believe is going to save people. The one thing I loved was how they made it clear that your value doesn't come from good looks or career. Amen!
But oh boy, are they doing this wrong. I wouldn't want my (possible) future daughters reading this- don't think it would benefit them in any way, no matter if they were Christian or not.
Why are some Christians so focused on being perfect or living their lives in one exact way, when even the Bible has such a huge variety of different Godly examples on how to be a man or a woman? Misogyny with a very thin veil of God's will. Or, at least, what Kristen and Bethany think that is.
May 13, 2016
Girl Defined answered questions such as, “What does it mean to be a woman? How should a career fit into our lives? Is one gender more valuable than the other? Is my sole purpose just to grow up, get married, and have kids?�
While the book was written conservatively, it wasn’t wacky or old-fashioned. It challenged the thinking of girls at any stage of life, and stood up to cultural norms to see what the Bible really says.
One of my favorite chapters was chapter 3. In this chapter was one of my favorite quotes.
“God designed us to function best we’re paddling together for a cause greater than ourselves.�
And another favorite chapter was chapter 6, with a quote that sums up one of the most central themes of the entire book.
“Helping others is foundational in God's design for womanhood.�
I’ve been following Kristen and Bethany’s blog, girldefined.com for quite some time now, and have loved their posts about what biblical womanhood looks like. This book was a fantastic summarization of everything they blog about � from gender roles, to beauty, to identity, to culture, and relationships.
I’ve already convinced some friends to buy it, and it would make a wonderful book for a group study. After each chapter, there is a short study guide with discussion questions and activities.
I loved the format of the book. The chapters were manageably sized and divided, with adorably-styled quotes in the margins, attractive formatting, and a sweet, feminine design throughout.
Though filled with deep concepts and challenging ideals, it was easy to read and never dry or boring.
It only took me a few days to read through, and though I speed-read a bit, the principles stuck with me. I highly recommend this book to girls anywhere from twelve years old to adult, though it’s marketed to mid-to-older teens and young women. Honestly, any Christian woman could benefit from it.
Pick up your own copy on May 17th, 2016!
While the book was written conservatively, it wasn’t wacky or old-fashioned. It challenged the thinking of girls at any stage of life, and stood up to cultural norms to see what the Bible really says.
One of my favorite chapters was chapter 3. In this chapter was one of my favorite quotes.
“God designed us to function best we’re paddling together for a cause greater than ourselves.�
And another favorite chapter was chapter 6, with a quote that sums up one of the most central themes of the entire book.
“Helping others is foundational in God's design for womanhood.�
I’ve been following Kristen and Bethany’s blog, girldefined.com for quite some time now, and have loved their posts about what biblical womanhood looks like. This book was a fantastic summarization of everything they blog about � from gender roles, to beauty, to identity, to culture, and relationships.
I’ve already convinced some friends to buy it, and it would make a wonderful book for a group study. After each chapter, there is a short study guide with discussion questions and activities.
I loved the format of the book. The chapters were manageably sized and divided, with adorably-styled quotes in the margins, attractive formatting, and a sweet, feminine design throughout.
Though filled with deep concepts and challenging ideals, it was easy to read and never dry or boring.
It only took me a few days to read through, and though I speed-read a bit, the principles stuck with me. I highly recommend this book to girls anywhere from twelve years old to adult, though it’s marketed to mid-to-older teens and young women. Honestly, any Christian woman could benefit from it.
Pick up your own copy on May 17th, 2016!
January 9, 2020
I read this with an open mind awhile ago but I couldn't make it through. So I tried again, but I stopped as soon as they said that women who get careers are wimpy. I researched the authors and apparently they lived in their parents' home (who supported them into their 20s, one author being supported by her family until 28!) and have never worked a day in their lives. These women are dangerous, toxic, and freeloaders. They are feeding terrible and un-Christian ideas into the heads of women. They are privileged beyond belief to exist in a microcosm where they never had to get a job at McDonalds as a teen to help their family out.
Girl Defined? More like Girl Defined by Middle-Class Narrow-Minded White Women.
Now I get why people make memes out of them.
Stay away and go read a book by a more reputable Christian author like Rachel Held Evans.
Girl Defined? More like Girl Defined by Middle-Class Narrow-Minded White Women.
Now I get why people make memes out of them.
Stay away and go read a book by a more reputable Christian author like Rachel Held Evans.
June 8, 2016
Very good. It really explains what it means to be a woman, and from a complementarian viewpoint, not a patriarchal viewpoint, which I really appreciate. Kristen and Bethany go back to the Bible for their information and draw on their own personal experiences to explain what it all means. It's geared towards older girls, so I would recommend it for every female on the planet age 15 and up. Excellent book. I also recommend doing the study guides. I didn't write in the book, but in a notebook, but I feel like I got a lot more out of it by doing that than I would have simply by reading. Highly recommended. I also recommend their blog. I've learned a lot from these young women.
July 16, 2020
If you enjoy sexism, judgment, and books that talk about how wrong everyone else is, then this is the book for you.
May 17, 2016
When I requested to be a part of the Girl Defined launch team, and be sent their debut book, Girl Defined-God's Radical Design For Beauty, Femininity and Identity, what I never imagined was that I was going to be deeply convicted. This book was going to transform my false way of thinking, into something beautifully orchestrated by God.
Right from the start Kristen and Bethany set the stage for the deep meaningful things that need to be discussed, with hilarious and embarrassing (but relatable) stories from their past that they've learned from. They wrote this book in such a way, that makes you feel like you three are at a coffee shop talking with each other. What I loved so much about the storytelling aspect of the book was that is was fun and lighthearted, while being serious but not dense and boring.
This book is all about God's design for women's purpose and identity-and while it's not popular or praised-it's life changing.
The topics in this book, they're not just liberating, they will radically change your life! Kristen and Bethany simply explain controversial topics and leave no room for questioning because they are using biblical truths! They also explain God's design for the male and female (gender roles are important) which I really enjoyed. I was so deeply convicted when I discovered JUST how much I've been affected by the culture, by Satan. I've believed the lies of the big-bad checklist and the 'ideal woman' being alluring, successful and oh-so-well off. What a tragedy these things have embedded in the lives of millions of girls throughout history! Kristen and Bethany also delve into the meaning of being a "wimpy woman". One who's quick to comprise and too shameful to stand up for what's right. They talk about being bold with God's design and not giving in to what is "normal". With all the latest trends and what's "in", isn't it all just chasing after wind anyway?
I HIGHLY recommend this for ANY girl, at ANY stage of life, ANY age, coming from WHATEVER background, because I KNOW for a fact this book will be change your life for the good/forever.
Right from the start Kristen and Bethany set the stage for the deep meaningful things that need to be discussed, with hilarious and embarrassing (but relatable) stories from their past that they've learned from. They wrote this book in such a way, that makes you feel like you three are at a coffee shop talking with each other. What I loved so much about the storytelling aspect of the book was that is was fun and lighthearted, while being serious but not dense and boring.
This book is all about God's design for women's purpose and identity-and while it's not popular or praised-it's life changing.
The topics in this book, they're not just liberating, they will radically change your life! Kristen and Bethany simply explain controversial topics and leave no room for questioning because they are using biblical truths! They also explain God's design for the male and female (gender roles are important) which I really enjoyed. I was so deeply convicted when I discovered JUST how much I've been affected by the culture, by Satan. I've believed the lies of the big-bad checklist and the 'ideal woman' being alluring, successful and oh-so-well off. What a tragedy these things have embedded in the lives of millions of girls throughout history! Kristen and Bethany also delve into the meaning of being a "wimpy woman". One who's quick to comprise and too shameful to stand up for what's right. They talk about being bold with God's design and not giving in to what is "normal". With all the latest trends and what's "in", isn't it all just chasing after wind anyway?
I HIGHLY recommend this for ANY girl, at ANY stage of life, ANY age, coming from WHATEVER background, because I KNOW for a fact this book will be change your life for the good/forever.
April 27, 2021
Others seem to have handled the writing annoyances that I (Hyzie) found particularly problematic at length; I'll leave mine to the quip here and handle other things.
This book kept almost making a point and then sliding so far sideways from what the actual meaning was I felt like I was reading an Amelia Bedelia book.
Girls shouldn't stress themselves out and be comparing themselves to airbrushed models? Why yes, you're right! They should instead be modest and hide and not be prideful? Uh, okay, not where I thought you were going with that.
The weird victim-blaming section on Marilyn Monroe kind of came out of nowhere and left me rather convinced some of the reviews I had read were actually *downplaying* some of the book's faults.
The problem I really have with this is that it's taking extremely outdated beliefs and dressing them up as "real Christian" views. I have always found it funny and sad that many "real Christian" views don't include any of the nice stuff about loving each other and not judging people that make me continue to identify myself as a Christian and are instead awfully focused on why everyone (except the writer) is wrong and not worthy of being loved by God.
By the time we got to the gender roles section, I think my eyes had glazed over. If I never see "men aren't men anymore and women aren't women" in anything ever ever again it will be way too soon. Suffice it to say they feel strongly they should be Women (but never feminists!). Their idea of women involves three pillars. Two of them are, honestly, human goals: helping others and nurturing relationships. Apparently men don't get to do those? Or aren't expected to? I'm honestly not sure why those are exclusively female.
The third one, creating life, is...problematic for me. Sure, being born and identifying as female lets me have children. I think that's neat. Going to try that sometime, for sure. But the idea that that's one of the only three things of value I can bring to the world? And the idea that giving birth is somehow more important than parenting a child? It's all wrapped up in some weird baggage that I feel like should not be present in a book published in this millennium. Not "creating life" doesn't mean you're not a woman.
The whole "spiritual children" thing they try to pull seems to be a cop-out when they realized some women couldn't have biological children. If giving "time, service, and mentorship" also gives life (and sure, that seems a valid interpretation to me, though how that's different than the "helping others" pillar I'm not sure), then, again, I feel like we've hit a human pillar. Humans should help humans, they should offer time and mentorship when needed and useful and they can, they should nurture relationships with other humans because we are all humans and even the most introverted among us (hello!) needs other humans. This isn't some kind of "girl" thing.
I admit I didn't really expect to like this going in, but I figured it was worth a shot. I do read a decent amount of religious literature and I'm genuinely interested in how being female in modern times is treated. This doesn't feel modern or relevant to my life in any way, and it's got some harmful ideas in it that are likely to stifle a girl's sparkle if she reads it at an impressionable age. This just creates a new, smaller box for women instead of the one society sometimes forces them in, and it's a shame to see other women doing that.
This book kept almost making a point and then sliding so far sideways from what the actual meaning was I felt like I was reading an Amelia Bedelia book.
Girls shouldn't stress themselves out and be comparing themselves to airbrushed models? Why yes, you're right! They should instead be modest and hide and not be prideful? Uh, okay, not where I thought you were going with that.
The weird victim-blaming section on Marilyn Monroe kind of came out of nowhere and left me rather convinced some of the reviews I had read were actually *downplaying* some of the book's faults.
The problem I really have with this is that it's taking extremely outdated beliefs and dressing them up as "real Christian" views. I have always found it funny and sad that many "real Christian" views don't include any of the nice stuff about loving each other and not judging people that make me continue to identify myself as a Christian and are instead awfully focused on why everyone (except the writer) is wrong and not worthy of being loved by God.
By the time we got to the gender roles section, I think my eyes had glazed over. If I never see "men aren't men anymore and women aren't women" in anything ever ever again it will be way too soon. Suffice it to say they feel strongly they should be Women (but never feminists!). Their idea of women involves three pillars. Two of them are, honestly, human goals: helping others and nurturing relationships. Apparently men don't get to do those? Or aren't expected to? I'm honestly not sure why those are exclusively female.
The third one, creating life, is...problematic for me. Sure, being born and identifying as female lets me have children. I think that's neat. Going to try that sometime, for sure. But the idea that that's one of the only three things of value I can bring to the world? And the idea that giving birth is somehow more important than parenting a child? It's all wrapped up in some weird baggage that I feel like should not be present in a book published in this millennium. Not "creating life" doesn't mean you're not a woman.
The whole "spiritual children" thing they try to pull seems to be a cop-out when they realized some women couldn't have biological children. If giving "time, service, and mentorship" also gives life (and sure, that seems a valid interpretation to me, though how that's different than the "helping others" pillar I'm not sure), then, again, I feel like we've hit a human pillar. Humans should help humans, they should offer time and mentorship when needed and useful and they can, they should nurture relationships with other humans because we are all humans and even the most introverted among us (hello!) needs other humans. This isn't some kind of "girl" thing.
I admit I didn't really expect to like this going in, but I figured it was worth a shot. I do read a decent amount of religious literature and I'm genuinely interested in how being female in modern times is treated. This doesn't feel modern or relevant to my life in any way, and it's got some harmful ideas in it that are likely to stifle a girl's sparkle if she reads it at an impressionable age. This just creates a new, smaller box for women instead of the one society sometimes forces them in, and it's a shame to see other women doing that.
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April 23, 2017I have no idea how I feel about this book.
September 3, 2021
I thoroughly enjoyed this book! The first few chapters were not my favorite, but after Part One, I thought the book was excellent! I highlighted, underlined, and bookmarked so much!
Originally, I thought this book was better suited for single women (and maybe that's the best stage to read it) but there were still so many takeaways for me as a wife and mama!
I'll be sharing a more comprehensive review on my Instagram account in the next few weeks (@more_radiance).
Originally, I thought this book was better suited for single women (and maybe that's the best stage to read it) but there were still so many takeaways for me as a wife and mama!
I'll be sharing a more comprehensive review on my Instagram account in the next few weeks (@more_radiance).
January 10, 2019
I'm halfway through but already disappointed. I was fully ready to disagree strongly with some of their beliefs, that I don't mind - I believe it's important to challenge ourselves & our beliefs sometimes. I won't include criticisms of their presented beliefs in my review.
But this book is sloppy and poorly edited. Don't choose to write in first person if you're going to need to clarify which author is speaking every single time. When a sub-chapter is titled 'Kristen' is it really necessary to to write "me (Kristen)" in the very first sentence? No. When you write "ours" you dont need to specify "Kristen and Bethany", we know who wrote the book. Also listing things like siblings' names to have these people never come up again is boring & unnecessary.
I don't think either author has faith in their writing, or they expect the reader to be a compete idiot. An example of a woman in the bible will be given, and only on the following page will they spell out "as we just learned" - I know, I only read it twenty seconds ago. A paragraph about "if only i had..." thinking is immediately followed by an authors own "if only i had" example - and she found it necessity to literally add "did you catch that - if only i had...?" You should trust your reader remembers something from several chapters ago, let alone a couple of sentences.
The most well stated points in this book are just quotes from other books.
They seem to not understand their bias when they list a single Victoria's Secret model's actions as proof of their philosophy. We could name 30 who are living evidence to the contrary. Kylie Bisutti's story seems redundant anyway as the book opens with explaining Marilyn Monroe had beauty & fame yet wasn't fulfilled. I felt a repetitive example didnt add anything to the book.
This book is easy reading, I'll give it that. If you're curious it won't take you long to smash through it.
But this book is sloppy and poorly edited. Don't choose to write in first person if you're going to need to clarify which author is speaking every single time. When a sub-chapter is titled 'Kristen' is it really necessary to to write "me (Kristen)" in the very first sentence? No. When you write "ours" you dont need to specify "Kristen and Bethany", we know who wrote the book. Also listing things like siblings' names to have these people never come up again is boring & unnecessary.
I don't think either author has faith in their writing, or they expect the reader to be a compete idiot. An example of a woman in the bible will be given, and only on the following page will they spell out "as we just learned" - I know, I only read it twenty seconds ago. A paragraph about "if only i had..." thinking is immediately followed by an authors own "if only i had" example - and she found it necessity to literally add "did you catch that - if only i had...?" You should trust your reader remembers something from several chapters ago, let alone a couple of sentences.
The most well stated points in this book are just quotes from other books.
They seem to not understand their bias when they list a single Victoria's Secret model's actions as proof of their philosophy. We could name 30 who are living evidence to the contrary. Kylie Bisutti's story seems redundant anyway as the book opens with explaining Marilyn Monroe had beauty & fame yet wasn't fulfilled. I felt a repetitive example didnt add anything to the book.
This book is easy reading, I'll give it that. If you're curious it won't take you long to smash through it.
August 19, 2020
O recomand tuturor fetelor! Scrise de două surori, din două perspective diferite, cea a fetei căsătorite și cea singură, veți învăța cum trebuie să arate o fată conform Bibliei, ce trebuie să facem noi în perioada tinereții și cum să fructificăm fiecare clipă la maxim, încât să aibă rezultate în viitor și să aducă un plus vieții noastre.
March 30, 2020
Full of grand assumptions and examples that sound utterly made up; I can only conclude that the authors are deeply uncomfortable in the world they live in and are desperate to drag every other woman down to their level. Not particularly well written and even more poorly structured to boot.
May 14, 2022
dnfed - 10% in, because i couldn’t handle the problematic views
August 5, 2016
I joined the launch team for this book and received a free copy in the mail. I love Bible studies in general, but when it centers around a topic I am passionate about all the better!
Ladies, single and married, this book is a must read for each and every one of you! I thought I was solid in my thinking about beauty, femininity, identity, but God used this book to help point out errors in my thinking. If you come to this book with an open mind, and answer with an honest heart (the honest part is crucial as there won't be any change if you don't think you need it) I can almost guarantee a change in how you view yourself as a woman! It's THAT good! Good doesn't even begin to encompass half of the greatness between the covers of this precious message.
I strongly encourage you to go order your book and begin working through it as soon as possible. It's a bit difficult to swallow, but it's completely worth it!
Ladies, single and married, this book is a must read for each and every one of you! I thought I was solid in my thinking about beauty, femininity, identity, but God used this book to help point out errors in my thinking. If you come to this book with an open mind, and answer with an honest heart (the honest part is crucial as there won't be any change if you don't think you need it) I can almost guarantee a change in how you view yourself as a woman! It's THAT good! Good doesn't even begin to encompass half of the greatness between the covers of this precious message.
I strongly encourage you to go order your book and begin working through it as soon as possible. It's a bit difficult to swallow, but it's completely worth it!
October 5, 2022
Girl Defined is written for all ages through various stages of life, but I do think it’s more suited to a younger audience. With a study guide after each chapter and references in the back for further reading, Girl Defined touches on topics such as true beauty, where to find your purpose and identity, and God’s purpose for the role of woman.
For best reading I recommend using a study Bible to search out the verses they include and understand the context of the various verses they use to support their topics. They used different translations depending on how it suited the topic, hence the reason I brought out my own Bible just to keep things consistent. That’s personal preference on my part, though.
It’s a solid read for Christian girls and I’m happy to say I will be recommending it to my sisters (which doesn’t happen often 😅).
For best reading I recommend using a study Bible to search out the verses they include and understand the context of the various verses they use to support their topics. They used different translations depending on how it suited the topic, hence the reason I brought out my own Bible just to keep things consistent. That’s personal preference on my part, though.
It’s a solid read for Christian girls and I’m happy to say I will be recommending it to my sisters (which doesn’t happen often 😅).
August 10, 2019
This had some very helpful insights and fun illustrative true stories. While not many of the concepts were new to me, Kristen and Bethany's ability to state things as they are and ground their points in truth is incredible. It was great to have things I knew backed up with Scripture and to be challenged on the areas that are more in my head than my heart.
I recommend this to people who wonder if they're living out biblical feminity; people who want to be encouraged that they're not alone in the hard walk; and people who wonder why all the stuffy, strict standards for Christian women. (It's probably not what you think.)
I recommend this to people who wonder if they're living out biblical feminity; people who want to be encouraged that they're not alone in the hard walk; and people who wonder why all the stuffy, strict standards for Christian women. (It's probably not what you think.)
July 8, 2017
This book was outstanding! It taught me so much on the topic of God-defined womanhood and His purpose for women on earth. It is easy and enjoyable to read! I definitely recommend this book to every woman out there!
January 5, 2021
I am reading this book with a family member and I am loving it!! It is a must read!
October 11, 2022
I think this book would be a great conversation starter between a mom or mentor of a teen girl. It is very straightforward and does of a good job of undercutting what the culture says in light of what God says. If you are looking for a book that helps facilitates conversations and keeps its focus on honoring God, this is a great resource.
I would say that if you are in your mid-twenties or later or grew up firmly entrenched it biblical womanhood and weren’t really interested in what the world said you should be, you will find this book less helpful.
While a good resource, I had two things I didn’t love about this book. First, it fell into the same trap most books on biblical womanhood do: being a wife and mother is the destination and singleness is a season. While I deeply agree that being a wife and mother is important and is the calling of most women, I feel that there is an undue emphasis on it in our Christian culture. It leaves single women feeling useless, purposeless, and without a place. God has amazing plans for them too. I feel that it would be wiser to spend time on God’s call on our lives to glorify Him in whatever season of life.
Personally, I think they used their own creative storytelling of scripture to base ideas on instead of sticking to the text. There is plenty of scripture to back up what they were saying, it just would have taken some more time, which I would have thought was worthwhile.
Overall, I think this would make a great conversation starter for teen readers and help them connect with writers close to their own age.
Note: While this did not affect my rating, I would like to note that they mention being helpers for their dad until they got married. While they didn’t spend long on this (hence the reason it did no affect my rating) I would like to say while this is a sweet idea it isn’t a biblical one. God only calls wives to be helpmates to their husbands, not daughters to their fathers. We need to be careful girls don’t get the wrong idea about this.
I would say that if you are in your mid-twenties or later or grew up firmly entrenched it biblical womanhood and weren’t really interested in what the world said you should be, you will find this book less helpful.
While a good resource, I had two things I didn’t love about this book. First, it fell into the same trap most books on biblical womanhood do: being a wife and mother is the destination and singleness is a season. While I deeply agree that being a wife and mother is important and is the calling of most women, I feel that there is an undue emphasis on it in our Christian culture. It leaves single women feeling useless, purposeless, and without a place. God has amazing plans for them too. I feel that it would be wiser to spend time on God’s call on our lives to glorify Him in whatever season of life.
Personally, I think they used their own creative storytelling of scripture to base ideas on instead of sticking to the text. There is plenty of scripture to back up what they were saying, it just would have taken some more time, which I would have thought was worthwhile.
Overall, I think this would make a great conversation starter for teen readers and help them connect with writers close to their own age.
Note: While this did not affect my rating, I would like to note that they mention being helpers for their dad until they got married. While they didn’t spend long on this (hence the reason it did no affect my rating) I would like to say while this is a sweet idea it isn’t a biblical one. God only calls wives to be helpmates to their husbands, not daughters to their fathers. We need to be careful girls don’t get the wrong idea about this.
June 25, 2016
I came across Girl Defined Ministries on Twitter recently, and I loved reading about their stand for biblical femininity. Then I saw that they had written a book and requested to review it right away!
In Girl Defined, Kristen Clark and Bethany Baird (who are sisters) discuss God's design for women, and how that often clashes with our cultures expectations. They tell their personal journey in discovering what God expects of us as women and His plan for living out our God-given femininity. They address topics like gender roles, working outside the home, and relationships with grace and biblical wisdom. I really appreciated how organized this book was as they discussed the three "pillars" of biblical femininity, and how those apply to life and the decisions we have to make as women.
The book is written in the tone of big sisters encouraging a little sister, and it was very easy to read - a book I looked forward to picking up. I would say that target audience is probably late teens to early twenties. However, I still got a lot of encouragement out of this book personally, even though I'm probably a bit older than the target audience. Some of the topics they address are big enough to have their own books, but I liked how the Kristin and Bethany stayed focused on the big picture. I was especially encouraged by the chapter on living in light of eternity, since that is something I've written about because it's so important. I appreciated the reminder and encouragement to live to glorify God, because what we do here counts for eternity.
This is a book I'll be hanging on to for Gwen and Clarice when they reach their teenage years - some books are timeless, and I think the focus on God's design for women will be just as relevant in another 12-15 years when they will be ready for this book. I'd definitely recommend it!
Note: I received a copy of this book for free in exchange for a review. This is my honest opinion.
In Girl Defined, Kristen Clark and Bethany Baird (who are sisters) discuss God's design for women, and how that often clashes with our cultures expectations. They tell their personal journey in discovering what God expects of us as women and His plan for living out our God-given femininity. They address topics like gender roles, working outside the home, and relationships with grace and biblical wisdom. I really appreciated how organized this book was as they discussed the three "pillars" of biblical femininity, and how those apply to life and the decisions we have to make as women.
The book is written in the tone of big sisters encouraging a little sister, and it was very easy to read - a book I looked forward to picking up. I would say that target audience is probably late teens to early twenties. However, I still got a lot of encouragement out of this book personally, even though I'm probably a bit older than the target audience. Some of the topics they address are big enough to have their own books, but I liked how the Kristin and Bethany stayed focused on the big picture. I was especially encouraged by the chapter on living in light of eternity, since that is something I've written about because it's so important. I appreciated the reminder and encouragement to live to glorify God, because what we do here counts for eternity.
This is a book I'll be hanging on to for Gwen and Clarice when they reach their teenage years - some books are timeless, and I think the focus on God's design for women will be just as relevant in another 12-15 years when they will be ready for this book. I'd definitely recommend it!
Note: I received a copy of this book for free in exchange for a review. This is my honest opinion.
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