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Deposing Nathan
Nate never imagined that he would be attacked by his best friend, Cam.
Now, Nate is being called to deliver a sworn statement that will get Cam convicted. The problem is, the real story isn’t that easy or convenient—just like Nate and Cam’s friendship. Cam challenged Nate on every level from the day the boys met. He pushed him to break the rules, to dream, and to accept himself. But Nate—armed with a fierce moral code and conflicted by his own beliefs—started to push back. With each push, Nate and Cam moved closer to each other—but also spiraled closer to their breaking points.
Now, Nate is being called to deliver a sworn statement that will get Cam convicted. The problem is, the real story isn’t that easy or convenient—just like Nate and Cam’s friendship. Cam challenged Nate on every level from the day the boys met. He pushed him to break the rules, to dream, and to accept himself. But Nate—armed with a fierce moral code and conflicted by his own beliefs—started to push back. With each push, Nate and Cam moved closer to each other—but also spiraled closer to their breaking points.
393 pages, Hardcover
First published May 7, 2019
65 people are currently reading
9,519 people want to read
About the author
Zack Smedley
2books292followersZack Smedley was born and raised in southern Maryland, in an endearing county almost no one has heard of. He has a degree in Chemical Engineering from UMBC and currently works within the field. As a member of the LGBT community, his goal is to give a voice to marginalized young adults through gritty, morally complex narratives. He spends his free time building furniture, baking, tinkering with electronics, and managing his obsession with the works of Aaron Sorkin. DEPOSING NATHAN is his first novel.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 482 reviews
April 14, 2021
4 1/2 stars. Did I think was a good book? Well, if by that you mean “did it completely destroy me?� then yeah, it’s a good book.
It only appeared on my radar after my GR friend Amy said "I hated this book. And it was phenomenal" which, you know, how could I turn away from a statement like that? And it sums the book up completely. I devoured it in two sittings, completely immersed in the lives of these characters in a way I haven't felt from YA Contemporary in a while.
Sometimes the best kinds of stories are those that take a familiar concept - in this case, a religious teenager figuring out he might not be straight - and breathe new life into it. While Nate wrestling with his sexuality is at the core of this book, it's also about several complex, nuanced characters, about religion (as someone who doesn't usually care for this in books, I thought it was done surprisingly well), and about abuse.
What made this an especially emotive read for me is the way it explored some of the grey areas of abuse that precede the more overt kind. The gradual crossing of the fine lines between protective and abusive. Thinking back over it right now, I have bumps rising along my arms. My response to this book was deep and visceral; I can't stop thinking about it.
I also think one of the things that made this book stand out is that the characters were charismatic and their dialogue really funny. Even in scenes where there was little plot progression, I thoroughly enjoyed reading it because of the hilarious conversations between Nate and others.
Many parts of this book had me on the edge of my seat, or else on the edge of tears. And the ending damn near broke me.
I'm going to take this opportunity to recommend a song I recently discovered that seems quite relevant - .
It only appeared on my radar after my GR friend Amy said "I hated this book. And it was phenomenal" which, you know, how could I turn away from a statement like that? And it sums the book up completely. I devoured it in two sittings, completely immersed in the lives of these characters in a way I haven't felt from YA Contemporary in a while.
Sometimes the best kinds of stories are those that take a familiar concept - in this case, a religious teenager figuring out he might not be straight - and breathe new life into it. While Nate wrestling with his sexuality is at the core of this book, it's also about several complex, nuanced characters, about religion (as someone who doesn't usually care for this in books, I thought it was done surprisingly well), and about abuse.
What made this an especially emotive read for me is the way it explored some of the grey areas of abuse that precede the more overt kind. The gradual crossing of the fine lines between protective and abusive. Thinking back over it right now, I have bumps rising along my arms. My response to this book was deep and visceral; I can't stop thinking about it.
I also think one of the things that made this book stand out is that the characters were charismatic and their dialogue really funny. Even in scenes where there was little plot progression, I thoroughly enjoyed reading it because of the hilarious conversations between Nate and others.
Many parts of this book had me on the edge of my seat, or else on the edge of tears. And the ending damn near broke me.
I'm going to take this opportunity to recommend a song I recently discovered that seems quite relevant - .
January 16, 2019
Made it with my own two brain cells <3
April 6, 2021
"If you think you have to earn enough points on someone's rubric for them to accept you, then either you're wrong to assume they won't love you for who you are, or they never loved you in the first place."
This book reads like a punch in the gut feels so naturally it's 5 out of 5 stars.
Deposing Nathan was one of my most anticipated books of 2019. I knew it was going to hurt. I knew it was going to wreck me. I knew it would love it. And I was 100% right.
Let me start with saying that I really love main-characters that enjoy cursing. No matter what you're gonna say, it's FUN and Nathan and Cameron seem to think so, too. So prepare yourself for a high dose of curse words. I also really love books about boys who fall in love with boys. Deposing Nathan is about coming to terms with who you are, it's about self-discovery and self-acceptance. Here comes a brief plot overview:
Nathan lives with his dad and his aunt, who moved in after his mother died when Nathan was 7 years old. He has an amazing girlfriend, he believes in God, he likes to paint and draw but doubts that his parents will let him take an art-degree. When Cam, the new boy in school approaches him on their first day after the summer break, they become instant friends. Cameron challenges Nathan's beliefs and turns his world upside down, to the strong dismay of his aunt. Every time Nathan disobeys her, her rules become stricter, her punishments crueller, and his relationship with Cam slowly breaks under the pressure. It doesn't help that their feelings for each other are more than those of just friends. One thing leads to another and one day Nathan wakes up on the lawn in front of his house, with a deep cut in his stomach and blood pooling around him. But the truth of what happened might hurt much more. And it will have to come out.
This is not an easy book. I won't coddle you, it won't hold back, it will show you just how messy life can be sometimes. But that is exactly why you should read it. On the one hand, it talks about the importance of truth and trust in all sorts of relationships - friends, lovers, family. On the other hand - spoilers ahead - it deals with the harsh reality of domestic abuse. There is a difference between strict parents and parents that enjoy punishing their children. Nathan's aunt definitely loves to see Nathan suffer. The smallest sidestep and she turns into a vicious beast. Seeing Nathan being humiliated by her hurt a lot, but it also made my blood boil in a way that few fictional characters ever did. She is basically a muggle version of Dolores Umbridge.
Just when I thought that this book could not get any better, it surprised me once again. So many YA books - romance, dystopian, fantasy - depict unhealthy and toxic relationships. I'm used to two characters getting a happily ever after even though they're clearly not supposed to be together. I had not seen that coming. Fifty pages earlier I had thought the exact same thing. And it was then that I knew that this book would receive no less than 5 stars.
Young adult literature manages to surprise me again and again. Books like this one are brave because they're not afraid to test the limits of what YA can do. They remind me why I love YA. Because it can move mountains. Because it lends a voice to matters that have mostly gone unheard. Because it gives strength to those in need. Because it doesn't underestimate teenagers. I could go on but all that's left to say is one thing: read Deposing Nathan.
Thank you to Page Street Publishing for providing me with a review copy!
This book reads like a punch in the gut feels so naturally it's 5 out of 5 stars.
Deposing Nathan was one of my most anticipated books of 2019. I knew it was going to hurt. I knew it was going to wreck me. I knew it would love it. And I was 100% right.
Let me start with saying that I really love main-characters that enjoy cursing. No matter what you're gonna say, it's FUN and Nathan and Cameron seem to think so, too. So prepare yourself for a high dose of curse words. I also really love books about boys who fall in love with boys. Deposing Nathan is about coming to terms with who you are, it's about self-discovery and self-acceptance. Here comes a brief plot overview:
Nathan lives with his dad and his aunt, who moved in after his mother died when Nathan was 7 years old. He has an amazing girlfriend, he believes in God, he likes to paint and draw but doubts that his parents will let him take an art-degree. When Cam, the new boy in school approaches him on their first day after the summer break, they become instant friends. Cameron challenges Nathan's beliefs and turns his world upside down, to the strong dismay of his aunt. Every time Nathan disobeys her, her rules become stricter, her punishments crueller, and his relationship with Cam slowly breaks under the pressure. It doesn't help that their feelings for each other are more than those of just friends. One thing leads to another and one day Nathan wakes up on the lawn in front of his house, with a deep cut in his stomach and blood pooling around him. But the truth of what happened might hurt much more. And it will have to come out.
This is not an easy book. I won't coddle you, it won't hold back, it will show you just how messy life can be sometimes. But that is exactly why you should read it. On the one hand, it talks about the importance of truth and trust in all sorts of relationships - friends, lovers, family. On the other hand - spoilers ahead - it deals with the harsh reality of domestic abuse. There is a difference between strict parents and parents that enjoy punishing their children. Nathan's aunt definitely loves to see Nathan suffer. The smallest sidestep and she turns into a vicious beast. Seeing Nathan being humiliated by her hurt a lot, but it also made my blood boil in a way that few fictional characters ever did. She is basically a muggle version of Dolores Umbridge.
Just when I thought that this book could not get any better, it surprised me once again. So many YA books - romance, dystopian, fantasy - depict unhealthy and toxic relationships. I'm used to two characters getting a happily ever after even though they're clearly not supposed to be together. I had not seen that coming. Fifty pages earlier I had thought the exact same thing. And it was then that I knew that this book would receive no less than 5 stars.
Young adult literature manages to surprise me again and again. Books like this one are brave because they're not afraid to test the limits of what YA can do. They remind me why I love YA. Because it can move mountains. Because it lends a voice to matters that have mostly gone unheard. Because it gives strength to those in need. Because it doesn't underestimate teenagers. I could go on but all that's left to say is one thing: read Deposing Nathan.
Thank you to Page Street Publishing for providing me with a review copy!
June 8, 2019
This review and other non-spoilery reviews can be found
“It’s not cute when people try to ‘fix� each other. It’s cringey and dysfunctional. We both need to already have our shit worked out before we bring anyone else into it.�
🌟 So one of my friends have told me you are the stingiest reader when it comes to 5 stars! I think I deserve that title because this is my 50th book for this year and still no 5 stars. I feel like I need to explain why this is not a 5 stars book for me as all of my friends who read it gave it 5 stars. And it is not that I am losing anything if I give 5 stars but I feel that there is an ethical obligation for me to be as honest as possible so let’s break my thoughts into the elements of the story as usual!
🌟 I am starting with the characters as I felt they were the focus of the story. Nathan and Cam are both well written and realistic, the YA genre is filled with precocious or immature characters but the characters in this book acted according to their age; they were cursing and were confused and were still discovering themselves and the world which is cool. But their drama may have been a bit repetitive and too much toward the end!
We also have aunt Lori, she reminds me of Dolores Umbridge and I may have wanted to punch her in the face the whole book. Nate’s father was absent a lot and he mentions that in the book so it is OK. What I didn’t like is related to the plot so I will leave it for there.
🌟 The writing is good, not too poetic not rigid. It was not special but I think it was very good as a debut, I also like the nerdy trivia in the book!
🌟The plot was interesting, because the story starts from the end and then we go back and forth to know what happens. I know some readers don’t like this but I assure you that it was not confusing and mostly the story was set in the past. We are trying to know why Nate and Cam who are supposed to be close friends had a fight almost to death! The story is fast paced and can be finished in one day.
🌟 What irked me was that Cam had an eidetic memory, that alone is not sufficient to make him an expert in all fields, medicine for example is more than just mere doses and information to cram. Cam was giving drugs and doses just because he knows them?! That was a tiny detail that I feel originates from the author’s degree in chemistry (Yes, I do read acknowledgments and about the author pages!).
🌟 I like to keep my reviews spoiler free so this is hard to write, There were 2 plot twists at the end, one regarding the deposition which I liked and actually could guess a few pages before it happened. The second one may have been good but I think someone with an eidetic memory should have realized this long before the ending! This sounds vague but when you read it you will understand what I mean!
🌟 So overall, it was a great debut with an amazing LGBT representation and friends dynamics, it is a fast read and worth reading but I still think that some of the details could have been better!
“It’s not cute when people try to ‘fix� each other. It’s cringey and dysfunctional. We both need to already have our shit worked out before we bring anyone else into it.�
🌟 So one of my friends have told me you are the stingiest reader when it comes to 5 stars! I think I deserve that title because this is my 50th book for this year and still no 5 stars. I feel like I need to explain why this is not a 5 stars book for me as all of my friends who read it gave it 5 stars. And it is not that I am losing anything if I give 5 stars but I feel that there is an ethical obligation for me to be as honest as possible so let’s break my thoughts into the elements of the story as usual!
🌟 I am starting with the characters as I felt they were the focus of the story. Nathan and Cam are both well written and realistic, the YA genre is filled with precocious or immature characters but the characters in this book acted according to their age; they were cursing and were confused and were still discovering themselves and the world which is cool. But their drama may have been a bit repetitive and too much toward the end!
We also have aunt Lori, she reminds me of Dolores Umbridge and I may have wanted to punch her in the face the whole book. Nate’s father was absent a lot and he mentions that in the book so it is OK. What I didn’t like is related to the plot so I will leave it for there.
🌟 The writing is good, not too poetic not rigid. It was not special but I think it was very good as a debut, I also like the nerdy trivia in the book!
🌟The plot was interesting, because the story starts from the end and then we go back and forth to know what happens. I know some readers don’t like this but I assure you that it was not confusing and mostly the story was set in the past. We are trying to know why Nate and Cam who are supposed to be close friends had a fight almost to death! The story is fast paced and can be finished in one day.
🌟 What irked me was that Cam had an eidetic memory, that alone is not sufficient to make him an expert in all fields, medicine for example is more than just mere doses and information to cram. Cam was giving drugs and doses just because he knows them?! That was a tiny detail that I feel originates from the author’s degree in chemistry (Yes, I do read acknowledgments and about the author pages!).
🌟 I like to keep my reviews spoiler free so this is hard to write, There were 2 plot twists at the end, one regarding the deposition which I liked and actually could guess a few pages before it happened. The second one may have been good but I think someone with an eidetic memory should have realized this long before the ending! This sounds vague but when you read it you will understand what I mean!
🌟 So overall, it was a great debut with an amazing LGBT representation and friends dynamics, it is a fast read and worth reading but I still think that some of the details could have been better!
May 7, 2019
Nate’s always been a good kid. But when he becomes friends with the new guy at school, Cam, his family notices a change. Cam’s the kind of guy who forces him to think about life, the universe, and his dreams � and, yeah, sometimes they break the rules. Soon their two worlds twist around each other and, as Nate explores his feelings for Cam, everything implodes in a fistfight that ends up with Nate stabbed and Cam in jail. Now Nate’s forced to give a statement under oath. But to tell the truth about everything that happened? Well, that’s complicated.
Never before has a debut caused so much emotional whiplash. However much praise Zack Smedley is currently getting for this book is not enough. Deposing Nathan is nothing short of a complete triumph. Period. Full Stop. And yes, that might sound like raving praise, but so rarely does a novel come along, particularly a debut, that provides such a complicated and satisfying reading experience as this one does.
Smedley achieves this by using a unique framing device. The opening showcases how everything brutally ends: Nate and Cam fighting. However, Smedley quickly pulls back and reveals that this action has already happened. Nate’s actually speaking at a deposition, reliving the past several months under the gaze of the very cast of characters that caused so much tumult: his father, his aunt Lori, and, of course, Cam himself. It’s awkward and uncomfortable as Nate recounts how a simple friendship blossomed into something violent, and Smedley draws as much tension from these scenes as possible.
Genuisely, this setting also gives heft to Nate’s story. While some of his actions might make him seem like an unreliable narrator, the fact that he’s at a deposition suggests that the reader is hearing the whole truth.
With that, it’s the characters themselves that make everything click. They’re unapologtically messy, caught in the weird period of transition that is high school. Nate struggles with himself, his faith, and his family all without examining his legitimate problems. Cam, cocky but vulnerable, confuses him with his constant questioning and unique worldview. Their relationship and interactions are entirely believable in a way that isn’t always happy or pleasant, but it’s always real.
It helps that Smedley has an amazingly readable style. Short chapters packed with action and snappy banter, this book flies by. And yet it’s anything but breezy. Rather, it’s like a roller coaster without a visible ending. It loops and turns, careening dangerously until it suddenly stops. And upon exit, there’s a moment of sadness that it’s over, but pure contentment that it happened at all.
This is the book to read this year.
Note: I received a free ARC of this book through NetGalley.
Never before has a debut caused so much emotional whiplash. However much praise Zack Smedley is currently getting for this book is not enough. Deposing Nathan is nothing short of a complete triumph. Period. Full Stop. And yes, that might sound like raving praise, but so rarely does a novel come along, particularly a debut, that provides such a complicated and satisfying reading experience as this one does.
Smedley achieves this by using a unique framing device. The opening showcases how everything brutally ends: Nate and Cam fighting. However, Smedley quickly pulls back and reveals that this action has already happened. Nate’s actually speaking at a deposition, reliving the past several months under the gaze of the very cast of characters that caused so much tumult: his father, his aunt Lori, and, of course, Cam himself. It’s awkward and uncomfortable as Nate recounts how a simple friendship blossomed into something violent, and Smedley draws as much tension from these scenes as possible.
Genuisely, this setting also gives heft to Nate’s story. While some of his actions might make him seem like an unreliable narrator, the fact that he’s at a deposition suggests that the reader is hearing the whole truth.
With that, it’s the characters themselves that make everything click. They’re unapologtically messy, caught in the weird period of transition that is high school. Nate struggles with himself, his faith, and his family all without examining his legitimate problems. Cam, cocky but vulnerable, confuses him with his constant questioning and unique worldview. Their relationship and interactions are entirely believable in a way that isn’t always happy or pleasant, but it’s always real.
It helps that Smedley has an amazingly readable style. Short chapters packed with action and snappy banter, this book flies by. And yet it’s anything but breezy. Rather, it’s like a roller coaster without a visible ending. It loops and turns, careening dangerously until it suddenly stops. And upon exit, there’s a moment of sadness that it’s over, but pure contentment that it happened at all.
This is the book to read this year.
Note: I received a free ARC of this book through NetGalley.
March 27, 2019
This book REALLY took me by surprise. Though simply written with the occasional trope, this story was beautifully done. It explores a lot of moral complexities that YA contemporaries in general tend to shy away from, as both Nate and Cameron are very aware of their own flaws and how it affects them. As a result, Nate and Cameron’s relationship was one of the most refreshing dynamics between two characters I’ve read about in a contemporary for some time. It balanced being both tense and unpredictable whilst also being beautiful and insightful and I was crying my way through the last 30 pages!!! So yeah, LOVED this one, it was such a brilliant debut, and I CANNOT wait for it to be released so EVERYONE can read it!!!!!
“I am who I am. I’ve never acted on less than that, and I never want to.�
- Nathan Copeland
“I am who I am. I’ve never acted on less than that, and I never want to.�
- Nathan Copeland
May 9, 2019
I have THOUGHTS.
First off, whew boy was I a basketful of emotions during this book. From shaking with anger to full on crying, I did it all.
Second, each character was so well done, I changed my mind several times over whether or not I hated certain people (in the end my answer was obvious).
As a first book, I am so incredibly impressed and will 100% be reading more of this author in the future.
*special thanks to TJ Reads the Stars for putting this book on my radar and influencing my decision to buy it*
First off, whew boy was I a basketful of emotions during this book. From shaking with anger to full on crying, I did it all.
Second, each character was so well done, I changed my mind several times over whether or not I hated certain people (in the end my answer was obvious).
As a first book, I am so incredibly impressed and will 100% be reading more of this author in the future.
*special thanks to TJ Reads the Stars for putting this book on my radar and influencing my decision to buy it*
April 10, 2021
I hated this book. And it was phenomenal.
I honestly can’t remember having so many visceral negative emotions about a book as DEPOSING NATHAN.
Narrator Nathan is the opposite of a Profile in Courage. He’s deceitful, mostly to himself, but also to those he loves. Who wouldn’t be brainwashed by a church to believe bisexuality would send him to hell? Who wouldn’t be living with the most controlling, emotionally abusive aunt (Lori), his dead mother’s sister who functions as a parent? Who wouldn’t be with a dad who was never home and ceded parental decision to his brutal aunt?
When he meets Cameron on the first day of junior year, he doesn’t expect to start experimenting sexually. Nate has a girlfriend, after all. Somehow, not a year later, Nathan is being deposed at Cam’s pretrial hearing for having stabbed Nate. But, facts aren’t always as they seem and over the next three days Nathan tells the story of his relationship with Cam and the events that transpired that lead up to the hearing.
Zack Smedley had me angry for nearly the entire book. I didn’t expect religion to play such an important component of DEPOSING NATHAN, if I had, is probably not have preordered it. I didn’t expect the controlling, emotional abuse perpetrated by Lori to hit me so hard. Her brutality hit a little too close to home and was entirely believable. Smedley did a fantastic job portraying the love a child feels for an abusive parent (aunt), taking on the burden of deserving the maltreatment and not realizing the parent (abuser is to blame).
Every word of DEPOSING NATHAN was believable, difficult and important. The only caveat I have is that if we were talking about an opposite sex relationship, Cam’s behavior would have been seen as coercive. I don’t believe in double standards between genders or with LGBT couples. Smedley portrayed both boys as in the questioning, experimental stage of understanding their sexualities. No balance of power existed any more than two friends trying out any form of teenage rebellion (sexual orientation isn’t rebellion, but it felt so to Nathan and Cameron).
The ending of DEPOSING NATHAN blew me away in the best possible way. I’m not suggesting sunshine and roses, far from it. DEPOSING NATHAN will stay with me for a long, long time.
ETA: The audiobook was one of my favorites from a male narrator.
I honestly can’t remember having so many visceral negative emotions about a book as DEPOSING NATHAN.
Narrator Nathan is the opposite of a Profile in Courage. He’s deceitful, mostly to himself, but also to those he loves. Who wouldn’t be brainwashed by a church to believe bisexuality would send him to hell? Who wouldn’t be living with the most controlling, emotionally abusive aunt (Lori), his dead mother’s sister who functions as a parent? Who wouldn’t be with a dad who was never home and ceded parental decision to his brutal aunt?
When he meets Cameron on the first day of junior year, he doesn’t expect to start experimenting sexually. Nate has a girlfriend, after all. Somehow, not a year later, Nathan is being deposed at Cam’s pretrial hearing for having stabbed Nate. But, facts aren’t always as they seem and over the next three days Nathan tells the story of his relationship with Cam and the events that transpired that lead up to the hearing.
Zack Smedley had me angry for nearly the entire book. I didn’t expect religion to play such an important component of DEPOSING NATHAN, if I had, is probably not have preordered it. I didn’t expect the controlling, emotional abuse perpetrated by Lori to hit me so hard. Her brutality hit a little too close to home and was entirely believable. Smedley did a fantastic job portraying the love a child feels for an abusive parent (aunt), taking on the burden of deserving the maltreatment and not realizing the parent (abuser is to blame).
Every word of DEPOSING NATHAN was believable, difficult and important. The only caveat I have is that if we were talking about an opposite sex relationship, Cam’s behavior would have been seen as coercive. I don’t believe in double standards between genders or with LGBT couples. Smedley portrayed both boys as in the questioning, experimental stage of understanding their sexualities. No balance of power existed any more than two friends trying out any form of teenage rebellion (sexual orientation isn’t rebellion, but it felt so to Nathan and Cameron).
The ending of DEPOSING NATHAN blew me away in the best possible way. I’m not suggesting sunshine and roses, far from it. DEPOSING NATHAN will stay with me for a long, long time.
ETA: The audiobook was one of my favorites from a male narrator.
April 22, 2021
I find myself at a loss for words on this one. Partially because I feel devastated. This book punched me in the gut, smashed my heart and I still haven’t recovered. Also because this is one of those books that, in my opinion, it’s best to go in blind.
It snuck up on me, the tension building until it was 2:00 am and I decided sleep was for the weak and caffeine would get me through today. Which it did. It always does.
It’s a dark read. Bleak but with just enough light and beauty to keep me reading and give me hope. I spent lots of the time reading it feeling so damn angry. By the end, I felt emotionally drained. And speaking of the ending, it wasn’t the one that I wanted. But it was the one that made sense.
Other reviews are way better than mine and include content warnings. I may come back and add some. Or you can message me if you want to know.
If you need me, I’ll be curled up in a ball, trying to get over this book hangover.
It snuck up on me, the tension building until it was 2:00 am and I decided sleep was for the weak and caffeine would get me through today. Which it did. It always does.
It’s a dark read. Bleak but with just enough light and beauty to keep me reading and give me hope. I spent lots of the time reading it feeling so damn angry. By the end, I felt emotionally drained. And speaking of the ending, it wasn’t the one that I wanted. But it was the one that made sense.
Other reviews are way better than mine and include content warnings. I may come back and add some. Or you can message me if you want to know.
If you need me, I’ll be curled up in a ball, trying to get over this book hangover.
May 26, 2019
Brilliant and heartbreaking, but also so true
I really loved this book. The structure of the story is unique � jumping back and forth between a deposition and flashbacks, and the author does it so well � it’s utterly seamless. In some ways I felt like I was watching a movie. I never got bored, which is one of the biggest compliments I can give a book. But it’s also got a great voice. The voice of an adolescent male, with all the bravado, stupid jokes, and geek-out moments of real people. I don’t know when I’ve read a YA book with such an authentic teen boy voice.
The main character, Nathan, is flawed but still likeable. It was heartbreaking at times to watch him try to avoid various truths because of one single truth that he thought would destroy his world. And thinking more about this, post-read, maybe there were two truths he couldn’t face, but I won’t say more because…spoilers. His fears felt real and I think that many young adults will see themselves in his character.
It’s refreshing to read a YA novel that centers on a bi character and the topic of religion is handled deftly. Any religious teen struggling with issues that his or her church frowns on will get something from this story.
I kept wondering how this book would end. So often, the ending takes the steam out of the book, but I really loved how the author ended Nathan’s story. It was pitch perfect. There were some good twists in the plot, too, which I didn’t see coming.
I think this book will teach readers to expect and demand more of their romantic partners. It gives all teens, but especially ones in the LBGTQQIA community, a script to follow - a way to help a friend in need, but then, once their safety net is in place, to turn the focus back on their own well-being and take care of themselves. Of all the gems in this book, this last part might be the best gift of all. I can see this novel becoming one of those dog-eared books that people carry around with them and reference often for inspiration and also to reminders of how to respond in difficult conversations. I recommend this book for anyone, but especially for religious, questioning teens.
I really loved this book. The structure of the story is unique � jumping back and forth between a deposition and flashbacks, and the author does it so well � it’s utterly seamless. In some ways I felt like I was watching a movie. I never got bored, which is one of the biggest compliments I can give a book. But it’s also got a great voice. The voice of an adolescent male, with all the bravado, stupid jokes, and geek-out moments of real people. I don’t know when I’ve read a YA book with such an authentic teen boy voice.
The main character, Nathan, is flawed but still likeable. It was heartbreaking at times to watch him try to avoid various truths because of one single truth that he thought would destroy his world. And thinking more about this, post-read, maybe there were two truths he couldn’t face, but I won’t say more because…spoilers. His fears felt real and I think that many young adults will see themselves in his character.
It’s refreshing to read a YA novel that centers on a bi character and the topic of religion is handled deftly. Any religious teen struggling with issues that his or her church frowns on will get something from this story.
I kept wondering how this book would end. So often, the ending takes the steam out of the book, but I really loved how the author ended Nathan’s story. It was pitch perfect. There were some good twists in the plot, too, which I didn’t see coming.
I think this book will teach readers to expect and demand more of their romantic partners. It gives all teens, but especially ones in the LBGTQQIA community, a script to follow - a way to help a friend in need, but then, once their safety net is in place, to turn the focus back on their own well-being and take care of themselves. Of all the gems in this book, this last part might be the best gift of all. I can see this novel becoming one of those dog-eared books that people carry around with them and reference often for inspiration and also to reminders of how to respond in difficult conversations. I recommend this book for anyone, but especially for religious, questioning teens.
Read
December 15, 2018I tried to keep my expectations neutral on this one because I felt like it could go in so many ways based on the premise, some of which were not positive, and they were kind of blown out of the water, if I'm being honest. This isn't a book about a trial so much as it is about two guys who quickly become really close and how they each handle it when that relationship turns into something they didn't expect. I see I'm the first review on this, so I really don't want to spoil anything, but I'll go with this:
1) Think THE DANGEROUS ART OF BLENDING IN meets BEEN HERE ALL ALONG, with shades of THE WICKER KING.
2) This is one of the few m/m (or f/f, tbh) books I've read that's very explicitly careful with bisexuality, not disavowing past relationships, checking stereotypes, etc.
3) I cried, repeatedly. And I didn't expect the ultimate ending but I did appreciate it.
CW: biphobia, gay bashing, abuse
1) Think THE DANGEROUS ART OF BLENDING IN meets BEEN HERE ALL ALONG, with shades of THE WICKER KING.
2) This is one of the few m/m (or f/f, tbh) books I've read that's very explicitly careful with bisexuality, not disavowing past relationships, checking stereotypes, etc.
3) I cried, repeatedly. And I didn't expect the ultimate ending but I did appreciate it.
CW: biphobia, gay bashing, abuse
July 14, 2021
3.5 stars
Didn't entirely buy the villain, but Zack Smedley showed quite a skill for writing sharp dialog and interesting relationships.
Didn't entirely buy the villain, but Zack Smedley showed quite a skill for writing sharp dialog and interesting relationships.
February 3, 2020
It's been a while since I last bawled my eyes out over a book.
January 1, 2023
Deposing Nathan literally blew me away. This is such a powerful and gripping book. From the first page onwards I was hooked and I just couldn't stop reading.
The book is about Nathan and Cam. It starts off at a deposition where Nathan tells us he got stabbed by Cam. But that it wasn't Cam's fault and that there is more to the story.
And that is where the story kick starts. The book varies between past and present. In the past we chronologically follow Nate and Cam from the moment they met, up to the point where Cam stabs Nate.
This book deals with so many complex subjects. Nate finds it hard to make friends. He has a girlfriend named Aria, and is friends with her twin brother Asher as well. So when he meets Cam he sorta keeps his distance emotionally. But they do meet up quickly. Cam really pushes Nate's boundaries and lets him explore himself.
Nate is growing up with a fairly distant father. And an overbearing aunt who is extremely strict. Every misstep Nate takes in his aunt's eyes, makes her punish him even more severely. His aunt is religious and has indoctrinated her faith in Nate as well.
Throughout the book Cam and Nate start to feel things for each other. And while Cam is more at ease with his feelings and with his sexuality, Nate feels disgusted and is angry at himself. And scared of what God will do to him for having these feelings. And because he is scared he is pushing Cam away hard. He says hurtful things and lashes out harshly at Cam. Meanwhile Cam is so convinced of their bond that nothing will push him away from Nate.
It broke my heart seeing the two boys navigate their feelings. How Nate denies everything he feels. How Cam is hurt buttries to be cheerful.
My heart HATED aunt Lori so quickly. And the further along the book we get the more shocked I was at the things she does and justifies.
I love how real this book feels. Even all the side characters have character arcs. And every character adds something to the story and to the two main characters.
The plot twists had me on the edge of my seat. I was shocked and screamed.
And that ending, oh that ending. It broke me into a million pieces. I absolutely adore it in every way possible. It feels realistic and true to the characters. But it broke me. And still I am reeling with all the emotions it invoked in me.
This is such a brilliant and gorgeous book. 5 huge and brilliant stars from me.
And I will definitely pick Zack Smedley's other book. I think he might become a favorite author of mine! �
The book is about Nathan and Cam. It starts off at a deposition where Nathan tells us he got stabbed by Cam. But that it wasn't Cam's fault and that there is more to the story.
And that is where the story kick starts. The book varies between past and present. In the past we chronologically follow Nate and Cam from the moment they met, up to the point where Cam stabs Nate.
This book deals with so many complex subjects. Nate finds it hard to make friends. He has a girlfriend named Aria, and is friends with her twin brother Asher as well. So when he meets Cam he sorta keeps his distance emotionally. But they do meet up quickly. Cam really pushes Nate's boundaries and lets him explore himself.
Nate is growing up with a fairly distant father. And an overbearing aunt who is extremely strict. Every misstep Nate takes in his aunt's eyes, makes her punish him even more severely. His aunt is religious and has indoctrinated her faith in Nate as well.
Throughout the book Cam and Nate start to feel things for each other. And while Cam is more at ease with his feelings and with his sexuality, Nate feels disgusted and is angry at himself. And scared of what God will do to him for having these feelings. And because he is scared he is pushing Cam away hard. He says hurtful things and lashes out harshly at Cam. Meanwhile Cam is so convinced of their bond that nothing will push him away from Nate.
It broke my heart seeing the two boys navigate their feelings. How Nate denies everything he feels. How Cam is hurt buttries to be cheerful.
My heart HATED aunt Lori so quickly. And the further along the book we get the more shocked I was at the things she does and justifies.
I love how real this book feels. Even all the side characters have character arcs. And every character adds something to the story and to the two main characters.
The plot twists had me on the edge of my seat. I was shocked and screamed.
And that ending, oh that ending. It broke me into a million pieces. I absolutely adore it in every way possible. It feels realistic and true to the characters. But it broke me. And still I am reeling with all the emotions it invoked in me.
This is such a brilliant and gorgeous book. 5 huge and brilliant stars from me.
And I will definitely pick Zack Smedley's other book. I think he might become a favorite author of mine! �
June 2, 2019
. : ☾⋆ � 5 �
READ THIS REVIEW ON MY BLOG!!!
this is not an easy book to review. Deposing Nathan, on paper, seems like a very straightforward book about friendship and self-acceptance—but reality is not as kind, and Deposing Nathan instead dives into a deep study of domestic and psychological abuse, internalized homophobia, religion, and, sure, also friendship and self-acceptance. but trust me when I say that never in a million years did I expect a YA, contemporary LGBT romance to hit me this hard.
I truly don’t know what to say about Deposing Nathan. it’s heartbreaking and hopeful, enraging and hilarious—ask me how Zack Smedley did it, but I honestly have no idea. it’s relatable in the most wholesome ways, but strikes you in the most unexpected moments with existential questions about religion and sexuality. Nate and Cam are incredible characters, both individually and as a unit, and more than anything I just wish this book had been longer. it’s a powerful read that touches on heavily significant themes, and I know I sound like I’m parroting myself at this point but I’m genuinely so emotional after having finished this book and I still can’t seem to wrap my head around it all.
I hope Deposing Nathan and Zack Smedley don’t go unnoticed. Nate’s harrowing, deprecating experience is real and relevant and I could feel his pain throughout the book. basically, Deposing Nathan is simply incredible, and it propels a thunderous start to my Pride Month TBR. amazing read!!
READ THIS REVIEW ON MY BLOG!!!
this is not an easy book to review. Deposing Nathan, on paper, seems like a very straightforward book about friendship and self-acceptance—but reality is not as kind, and Deposing Nathan instead dives into a deep study of domestic and psychological abuse, internalized homophobia, religion, and, sure, also friendship and self-acceptance. but trust me when I say that never in a million years did I expect a YA, contemporary LGBT romance to hit me this hard.
I truly don’t know what to say about Deposing Nathan. it’s heartbreaking and hopeful, enraging and hilarious—ask me how Zack Smedley did it, but I honestly have no idea. it’s relatable in the most wholesome ways, but strikes you in the most unexpected moments with existential questions about religion and sexuality. Nate and Cam are incredible characters, both individually and as a unit, and more than anything I just wish this book had been longer. it’s a powerful read that touches on heavily significant themes, and I know I sound like I’m parroting myself at this point but I’m genuinely so emotional after having finished this book and I still can’t seem to wrap my head around it all.
I hope Deposing Nathan and Zack Smedley don’t go unnoticed. Nate’s harrowing, deprecating experience is real and relevant and I could feel his pain throughout the book. basically, Deposing Nathan is simply incredible, and it propels a thunderous start to my Pride Month TBR. amazing read!!
August 21, 2019
This is easily one of the best debuts I’ve read this year. I was expecting to enjoy this one, but it absolutely blew me away. Themes such as religion, abusive parents, and hell � even bisexuality haven’t been portrayed as often as they should be in YA fiction, but Zack Smedley does them justice here. All of the characters and relationships are fleshed out, even the smallest ones. The prose are natural, and the humor is so funny. Deposing Nathan is so good, and even more � so important. I recommend this book with all my heart. Read it. 5/5 stars and a new favorite.
May 7, 2019
Disclaimer: I received this ARC courtesy of Page Street Kids through NetGalley. I am grateful for the opportunity to review an ARC for my readers, but this will not influence my final rating. All opinions expressed in this review are my own and based solely on the book.
I don't know how to wrap my head around this book.
I wrote and re-wrote this review, but nothing sounded authentic. I felt like I was trying to make sense of a book that to me, was a wholly emotional experience. From the moment I started reading, I became a captive listener to Nate's journey, a young man who—from the moment Cam comes into his life—no longer knows what to think, but everything he feels is so strong andraw.
What CAN I tell you aboutDeposing Nathan?
I was emotional from start to finish. Smedley brought me from laughing aloud to crying to full-blown frustration and anger then back around. I feel like it's an understatement to say that by the end of this book, I was thoroughly exhausted, but my mind was still going a mile a minute.
Truly, the 400-pages ofDeposing Nathanleft me emotionally wrecked, but oh wow was that ending satisfying in the worst way.
This book focused on themes of sexuality, religion, parent-child relationships, and friendships. Each one of these themes is explored so fully and realistically from a teenager's point of view. Nateis unapologetic about what he thinks, which can make him frustrating (and yes, unlikeable) at times. There were several instances in the book I objected strongly to his view points, but I could see at the same time how he was trying to learn.
📌SEXUALITY:(disclaimer. i am not lgbtq+ and while i have an opinion on the representation in this book, i encourage you to seek the thoughts of lgbtq+ reviewers.)Deposing Nathan provided a nuanced depiction of bisexuality. One character in the book rejects the "idea" of bisexual ("you think I'm half gay, half straight?") but is educated throughout the book. It's never a Sit Down and Learn About Bisexuals situation, but more a self-exploration which was more authentic to the character (and to how people learn in general). One of my favourite lines is when a character Googles a test to see if he is bisexual, and the only question is "I consider myself to be bisexual."
If you dislike books that contain anti-bi rhetoric, I would not recommend. I will only say that Smedley provides a great deal of depth to the topic, does not handle it lightly, and always reinforces the fact that bisexuality is real, is valid, is accepted.
📌RELIGION:I didnotknow religion was going to be part of this book. (it wasn't on the original summary.) I'm so glad it was though. Smedley added a whole conversation about the Christian God and sexuality that really made me think. (In my opinion, this aspect of the book is interesting for religious and non-religious readers alike.)
📌PARENT-CHILD RELATIONSHIPS:Okay but this was really well done? I ached inside reading the paragraphs between Nate and his Aunt Lori. There's a lot of emotional abuse and psychological abuse at first, which is theworst because people tend to brush it off like, "Everyone acts like this," and "it's normal." It's not! It's really not!
Later in the book, the effects of poor/abusing parenting on the child is seen when Nate himself lashes it. It's painful to read. But so gddmn real.
I wish I could pour my emotions out on screen and call it a review. Smedley so well handles the morally grey dynamics of a toxic relationship. An author to watch out for.
IMPORTANT. This book is not a "fun read". There is no cute romance. Please look very closely at my content warnings. Nate has been abused, he is repressed, and he lashes out within the book. Many of the characters in this book are morally grey.
rating:4.5 crowns
representation:bisexual rep, Christian rep
content warnings: swearing,homophobic slurs, physical abuse, psychological abuse, toxic relationship, anti-bi rhetoric, religious anti-gay rhetoric, masturbation, child abuse, infidelity
I don't know how to wrap my head around this book.
I wrote and re-wrote this review, but nothing sounded authentic. I felt like I was trying to make sense of a book that to me, was a wholly emotional experience. From the moment I started reading, I became a captive listener to Nate's journey, a young man who—from the moment Cam comes into his life—no longer knows what to think, but everything he feels is so strong andraw.
What CAN I tell you aboutDeposing Nathan?
I was emotional from start to finish. Smedley brought me from laughing aloud to crying to full-blown frustration and anger then back around. I feel like it's an understatement to say that by the end of this book, I was thoroughly exhausted, but my mind was still going a mile a minute.
Truly, the 400-pages ofDeposing Nathanleft me emotionally wrecked, but oh wow was that ending satisfying in the worst way.
This book focused on themes of sexuality, religion, parent-child relationships, and friendships. Each one of these themes is explored so fully and realistically from a teenager's point of view. Nateis unapologetic about what he thinks, which can make him frustrating (and yes, unlikeable) at times. There were several instances in the book I objected strongly to his view points, but I could see at the same time how he was trying to learn.
📌SEXUALITY:(disclaimer. i am not lgbtq+ and while i have an opinion on the representation in this book, i encourage you to seek the thoughts of lgbtq+ reviewers.)Deposing Nathan provided a nuanced depiction of bisexuality. One character in the book rejects the "idea" of bisexual ("you think I'm half gay, half straight?") but is educated throughout the book. It's never a Sit Down and Learn About Bisexuals situation, but more a self-exploration which was more authentic to the character (and to how people learn in general). One of my favourite lines is when a character Googles a test to see if he is bisexual, and the only question is "I consider myself to be bisexual."
If you dislike books that contain anti-bi rhetoric, I would not recommend. I will only say that Smedley provides a great deal of depth to the topic, does not handle it lightly, and always reinforces the fact that bisexuality is real, is valid, is accepted.
📌RELIGION:I didnotknow religion was going to be part of this book. (it wasn't on the original summary.) I'm so glad it was though. Smedley added a whole conversation about the Christian God and sexuality that really made me think. (In my opinion, this aspect of the book is interesting for religious and non-religious readers alike.)
📌PARENT-CHILD RELATIONSHIPS:Okay but this was really well done? I ached inside reading the paragraphs between Nate and his Aunt Lori. There's a lot of emotional abuse and psychological abuse at first, which is theworst because people tend to brush it off like, "Everyone acts like this," and "it's normal." It's not! It's really not!
Later in the book, the effects of poor/abusing parenting on the child is seen when Nate himself lashes it. It's painful to read. But so gddmn real.
I wish I could pour my emotions out on screen and call it a review. Smedley so well handles the morally grey dynamics of a toxic relationship. An author to watch out for.
IMPORTANT. This book is not a "fun read". There is no cute romance. Please look very closely at my content warnings. Nate has been abused, he is repressed, and he lashes out within the book. Many of the characters in this book are morally grey.
rating:4.5 crowns
representation:bisexual rep, Christian rep
content warnings: swearing,homophobic slurs, physical abuse, psychological abuse, toxic relationship, anti-bi rhetoric, religious anti-gay rhetoric, masturbation, child abuse, infidelity
February 27, 2021
5 amazing stars.
So this book is by far the best debut I have read. I loved the characters in the book and the writing was spectacular. I loved the way the plot was set up and how the author wove the narrative between what happened in the past and the deposition. The entire story was told with such grace and respect for the characters and what the author was portraying.
I love the bisexual representation in this book and that it was told with care and very unapologetically. Nathan and Cam are two of my favorite characters and they will stick with me for a long time. There were also great friendships represented in the book. The book is great and those last chapters from 72-80 were told with such fast pace and clarity. Just an overall great read and it is now on my top favorite books of all time. I will include one of my favorite quotes from the novel:
"I never hated myself for who I am. I never hated myself for being bi. I hated how my family made me feel about it. And then it hits me-maybe all at once, maybe a gradual build-that if you think you have to earn enough points on someone's rubric for them to accept you, then either you're wrong to assume they don't love you for who you are, or they never loved you in the first place."
So this book is by far the best debut I have read. I loved the characters in the book and the writing was spectacular. I loved the way the plot was set up and how the author wove the narrative between what happened in the past and the deposition. The entire story was told with such grace and respect for the characters and what the author was portraying.
I love the bisexual representation in this book and that it was told with care and very unapologetically. Nathan and Cam are two of my favorite characters and they will stick with me for a long time. There were also great friendships represented in the book. The book is great and those last chapters from 72-80 were told with such fast pace and clarity. Just an overall great read and it is now on my top favorite books of all time. I will include one of my favorite quotes from the novel:
"I never hated myself for who I am. I never hated myself for being bi. I hated how my family made me feel about it. And then it hits me-maybe all at once, maybe a gradual build-that if you think you have to earn enough points on someone's rubric for them to accept you, then either you're wrong to assume they don't love you for who you are, or they never loved you in the first place."
November 10, 2019
Real rating 1.5 stars, so rounding up to 2 stars. So... this book... I can't work out who this is for? The author has stated that "As a member of the LGBT community, his goal is to give a voice to marginalized young adults through gritty, morally complex narratives." but if I was a 'marginalized young adult' would I really want to read a rather depressing story about a teen in a really rather awful situation, or would I rather read something which would show the world as I would want it?
Now let’s talk about bisexuality. So, both MC's are revealed to be bisexual; yet neither one is written in a way that managed to convince me of their bisexuality. Cam feels like he would say things like 'Girls, love them boobs, there so boobie' while in a few years� time comes out as gay. Nate, on the other hand feels more like he's dealing with daddy issues rather than being bisexual. It's not a very convincing bisexual story. We also need to talk about Nate's aunt - if she had a moustache, she would be twirling it like an evil villain (it’s very 'Jerkbait' parents-esque). Not sure if I would recommend this to anyone.
Now let’s talk about bisexuality. So, both MC's are revealed to be bisexual; yet neither one is written in a way that managed to convince me of their bisexuality. Cam feels like he would say things like 'Girls, love them boobs, there so boobie' while in a few years� time comes out as gay. Nate, on the other hand feels more like he's dealing with daddy issues rather than being bisexual. It's not a very convincing bisexual story. We also need to talk about Nate's aunt - if she had a moustache, she would be twirling it like an evil villain (it’s very 'Jerkbait' parents-esque). Not sure if I would recommend this to anyone.
June 23, 2019
This is such a needed book in the YA and LGBT genres. Not only are the characters compelling and well-rounded, but it tackles some incredibly important and difficult topics. What's most impressive is how Smedley balances writing a bisexual main character who is also religious. It was extremely refreshing to see how faith and sexuality are not mutually exclusive and this book deserves so much praise for walking that line so perfectly and authentically. This book made me think, smile and hurt all at once. Give it a read for sure!
January 22, 2020
This is an incredible book. Nathan’s voice, the way it’s been written, fabulous! I’ve read it three times already and I rooted for Nathan and Cam so much. I loved this book, the best read of 2019!
June 19, 2019
What you have to understand about Cam - and this is important - is that up until he jammed a shard of ceramic in my gut, he was the best friend I’ve ever had. I know why I’m here, Mrs. Lawson, and I know what you want me to say. But you’re not going to like it, because the fight wasn’t just Cam’s fault. If anything, it was mine.
Within a couple of hours I’d heard about this book for the first time, bought it, and read the entire thing. Deposing Nathan has such an interesting story. Nate was stabbed by his best friend Cam, now Nate is being deposed, having to recall their entire friendship and what led to Cam attacking him. But as Nate asserts in the first lines of the book, it wasn’t just Cam’s fault.
I love books that have framing devices of interviews or police investigations in the present and then you flashback to watch the whole story unfold. It’s interesting knowing the endpoint and having to figure out how things spiraled so far out of control.
There are a lot of really important topics covered in this book, sexuality, homophobia, biphobia, abuse, and religion. I can sometimes find it hard to really enjoy books where the main character is religious and that plays a large part in the story. However with Nate I found his relationship with religion and church interesting, especially with how it led to so much internalized biphobia.
There are some very dramatic scenes in this book that sometimes seemed to cross over into being too melodramatic, at least for my taste. At times, certain scenarios seemed a little too Lifetime movie-esque.
This book definitely didn’t always go where I thought it would. The main character isn’t always the good guy, he does a lot of fucked up stuff. And there’s also a lot of fucked up stuff that happens to him. I’d definitely recommend this if you’re looking for a dark, hard-hitting queer YA book.
March 24, 2022
This was a difficult book for me to get through. "Aunt Lori" was such a one-dimensional character, and so much drama in the plot depended on her being exactly that evil villain. Nathan's father was mostly absent, and apparently didn't know what was going on.
I've read a range of YA books, and some of them appeal to readers of all ages, while others distinctly feel aimed at younger readers. This book did not appeal to me; Aunt Lori was triggering, and Nathan was never rebellious, never stood up for himself, never even talked to his father. When he was punished for talking to Cam, he was mad at Cam rather than being mad at his over-the-top aunt, and the convoluted drama of that misdirected anger would feed many many pages.
The crime that was the framing device, necessitating the deposition of the title, felt overly-constructed and unrealistic. (For fear of spoilers, I won't say more).
Another issue for me was the intense level of shame, guilt, anxiety � I thought things were meant to be getting better. Some of Nathan's issues seem to have been coming from being Catholic, but even the church scenes did not feel realistic.
I know many readers have loved this book, and many completely adore this book. Let's just say I'm not the target audience and am entirely too ossified.
I've read a range of YA books, and some of them appeal to readers of all ages, while others distinctly feel aimed at younger readers. This book did not appeal to me; Aunt Lori was triggering, and Nathan was never rebellious, never stood up for himself, never even talked to his father. When he was punished for talking to Cam, he was mad at Cam rather than being mad at his over-the-top aunt, and the convoluted drama of that misdirected anger would feed many many pages.
The crime that was the framing device, necessitating the deposition of the title, felt overly-constructed and unrealistic. (For fear of spoilers, I won't say more).
Another issue for me was the intense level of shame, guilt, anxiety � I thought things were meant to be getting better. Some of Nathan's issues seem to have been coming from being Catholic, but even the church scenes did not feel realistic.
I know many readers have loved this book, and many completely adore this book. Let's just say I'm not the target audience and am entirely too ossified.
March 10, 2019
The socially- and self-conscious dialogue is a little too on point and well delivered for high schoolers at times, but Deposing Nathan covers a lot of important ground and, for the most part, covers it well. Full review TK.
April 14, 2021
It was awesome. Ignoring the crying part of course.
May 8, 2024
4,5 stars. I don’t think I ever hated a fictional character more than I hated Lori.
FRTC.
FRTC.
January 14, 2020
The last time I couldn't put a book down, because I really wanted to know what was going on, was a few months ago. But then I started this one and I ended up reading till midnight, finishing it under tears, crying into the darkness. 🤣
I couldn't sleep afterwards. 🙈 This really messed me up on an emotional level. 😅
But first things first: I'm gonna spoiler a little in the end, there'll be a HUGE Spoilerwarning before, so you can skip these parts if you want to.
Also, check out the CW's first: Parental abuse, homophobia, (internalized) biphobia, homophobic slurs, violence, cheating, death of a parent (not on page).
So basically this book is about why Cam stabbed Nathan. 😬
Nathan is the maincharacter, Cam is the loveinterest and both were SO well written. The authors said himself that he wanted to write morally grey characters and it worked so well. They really gave me all the feels. I was laughing with them, felt angry, helpless, I cried. It was messy, it was an emotional rollercoaster.
Nathan is "the good guy", faithful, someone who prays to god to forgive his sins. He also lives with his abusive aunt and his Dad, who just goes with everything she does.
Cam on the other side is more "cocky" and funny, he's challenging and confusing Nathan in a way, Nathan can't quite handle.
I really liked the way religion was explored through both Nathan and Cam's eyes.
What really messed me up was the abusive aunt. 😕 Abuse has many faces and emotional abuse is real! In my opinion this topic was handled so well! There are so many things that parents are allowed to do, that are SO abusive and everybody goes with it! And it hurt so much, how Nathan thought it was his fault. This part of the book made ne so angry and broke my heart at the same time.
Both characters are bisexual. The bi rep was simply great. Cam coming to terms with his sexuality, while Nathan struggled throughout the whole book was also so well done.
And the writing style? EMOTIONAL!!! So well written. I wad into the story from page 1 and ended as an emotional mess. I reread the last part immediatly, because it was written in such a special way.
I highly recommend this book! Really, this was so good. 😭🧡
SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER:
Now to the spoilery part. I didn't see this end coming. I can't be the only one. 🙈😅 I was SO focused on the story itself, that I would never ever have guessed that? Though it was so clear, when I think about it. Both twists toward the end came totally unexpected for me. At one point I thought Cam did the stabbing "on purpose", so Nathan could get away from his aunt... 😅
Also the ending itself: SO good. I mean you read it and you know how toxic it is. Cam handled this so well. I cried anyway. 💁🏼♀�
SPOILER END SPOILER END SPOILER END
I couldn't sleep afterwards. 🙈 This really messed me up on an emotional level. 😅
But first things first: I'm gonna spoiler a little in the end, there'll be a HUGE Spoilerwarning before, so you can skip these parts if you want to.
Also, check out the CW's first: Parental abuse, homophobia, (internalized) biphobia, homophobic slurs, violence, cheating, death of a parent (not on page).
So basically this book is about why Cam stabbed Nathan. 😬
Nathan is the maincharacter, Cam is the loveinterest and both were SO well written. The authors said himself that he wanted to write morally grey characters and it worked so well. They really gave me all the feels. I was laughing with them, felt angry, helpless, I cried. It was messy, it was an emotional rollercoaster.
Nathan is "the good guy", faithful, someone who prays to god to forgive his sins. He also lives with his abusive aunt and his Dad, who just goes with everything she does.
Cam on the other side is more "cocky" and funny, he's challenging and confusing Nathan in a way, Nathan can't quite handle.
I really liked the way religion was explored through both Nathan and Cam's eyes.
What really messed me up was the abusive aunt. 😕 Abuse has many faces and emotional abuse is real! In my opinion this topic was handled so well! There are so many things that parents are allowed to do, that are SO abusive and everybody goes with it! And it hurt so much, how Nathan thought it was his fault. This part of the book made ne so angry and broke my heart at the same time.
Both characters are bisexual. The bi rep was simply great. Cam coming to terms with his sexuality, while Nathan struggled throughout the whole book was also so well done.
And the writing style? EMOTIONAL!!! So well written. I wad into the story from page 1 and ended as an emotional mess. I reread the last part immediatly, because it was written in such a special way.
I highly recommend this book! Really, this was so good. 😭🧡
SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER:
Now to the spoilery part. I didn't see this end coming. I can't be the only one. 🙈😅 I was SO focused on the story itself, that I would never ever have guessed that? Though it was so clear, when I think about it. Both twists toward the end came totally unexpected for me. At one point I thought Cam did the stabbing "on purpose", so Nathan could get away from his aunt... 😅
Also the ending itself: SO good. I mean you read it and you know how toxic it is. Cam handled this so well. I cried anyway. 💁🏼♀�
SPOILER END SPOILER END SPOILER END
April 2, 2019
*This was sent to me for review from the publisher. All thoughts and opinions are my own.*
4 stars.
I was expecting to love this, so it's no surprise that I did, but I'm glad that I did.
I loved that the characters were messy, so so damn messy to the end. I feel like authors tend to want to wrap all of their characters in a pretty little bow at the end of novels, but that's just not realistic, and I loved that these characters were still not the best people in the end.
I'm not bisexual so I can't fully say if the representation is done well, but there were no glaring problems and I liked how it dealt with internalized biphobia!
Overall, this is an incredibly sad book but one of the most honest portrayals of queer teens that I've seen in awhile. This is perfect for fans of Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe, but with a bit of a mysterious twist.
4 stars.
I was expecting to love this, so it's no surprise that I did, but I'm glad that I did.
I loved that the characters were messy, so so damn messy to the end. I feel like authors tend to want to wrap all of their characters in a pretty little bow at the end of novels, but that's just not realistic, and I loved that these characters were still not the best people in the end.
I'm not bisexual so I can't fully say if the representation is done well, but there were no glaring problems and I liked how it dealt with internalized biphobia!
Overall, this is an incredibly sad book but one of the most honest portrayals of queer teens that I've seen in awhile. This is perfect for fans of Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe, but with a bit of a mysterious twist.
August 27, 2021
Wow. Deposing Nathan is beautiful, troubling, enraging, and so, so good. It delivers twists, surprises, and even some laughs, but be warned: it also lands repeated emotional gut punches.
Highly recommended.
Highly recommended.
February 10, 2020
Well...holy hell that was wonderful. I don't really have enough words to describe this book, but I'll try to make them on my blog soon.
Peace out, y'all, read this book.
-Book Hugger
Peace out, y'all, read this book.
-Book Hugger
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