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109 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 1848
�Because at moments like that I start to think that I am incapable of living a proper life, I seem already to have lost any sort of judgment, any apprehension of the real and actual; because after all, I have cursed my very self; because after my nights of fantasy come moments of sobriety which are appalling…after all one matures, outgrows one’s former ideals: they are shattered into dust and fragments; and if you have no other life, it behooves you to construct one from those same fragments.�
�But to imagine that I should bear you a grudge, Nastenka! That I should cast a dark cloud over your serene, untroubled happiness; that by my bitter reproaches I should cause distress to your heart, should poison it with secret remorse and should force it to throb with anguish at the moment of bliss; that I should crush a single one of those tender blossoms which you have twined in your dark tresses when you go with him to the altar�. Oh never, never! May your sky be clear, may your sweet smile be bright and untroubled, and may you be blessed for that moment of blissful happiness which you gave to another, lonely and grateful heart!�
A strange anguish had tormented me since early morning. I suddenly had the impression that I had been left all alone, that everyone was shrinking away from me, avoiding me.
“There are, my dear Nastenka, in case you don’t know, some rather strange corners in Petersburg. It’s as if the sun that warms the rest of the city never shines on them, and instead another sun, especially designed for them, supplies them with a different light. In those corners, Nastenka, a life goes on quite unlike the one seething around us, a life that is possible in some far-away dreamland but certainly not here in our over-serious time. That life is a mixture of something out of pure fantasy ardently idealistic, with, alas, something bleak and dull and ordinary, not to say outright vulgar.�
“And how effortlessly, how naturally the dreamer’s world of fantasy springs up! It looks so real and not at all like a mirage! In fact, sometimes he almost believes that his dream life is no figment of the imagination, no self-deception, no delusion, but something real, actual, existing.�
لا تثق أبدا في كلام المرأة عند الغضب أو الفرح أو الحاجه أو التعب أو الملل أو السفر أو الـ ..... إنت فاضي و الا وراك حاجه :)
سوف تلهو بنا الحياة و تسخر
فتعال أحبك الأن أكثر
"نشعر بألم الآخرين شعورًا أعمق حين نكون أشقياء معذبين"
"لحظة بأكملها من السعادة... رباه! هل تحتاج حياة إنسان إلى أكثر من هذا؟"
“but how could you live and have no story to tell?�
“i am a dreamer. i know so little of real life that i just can’t help re-living such moments as these in my dreams, for such moments are something i have very rarely experienced. i am going to dream about you the whole night, the whole week, the whole year.�
“my God, a moment of bliss. why, isn't that enough for a whole lifetime?�