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亘丕夭蹖 賴丕
讴鬲丕亘蹖 丿乇 賲賵乇丿 乇賵丕賳卮賳丕爻蹖 乇賵丕亘胤 丕賳爻丕賳蹖
趩丕倬 賳禺爻鬲 1366
趩丕倬 賳禺爻鬲 1366
235 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 1964
6,126 people are currently reading
125k people want to read
About the author
Eric Berne
38听books685听followersEric Berne was a Canadian-born psychiatrist best known as the creator of transactional analysis. Eric was born on May 10, 1910 as Eric Lennard Bernstein in Montreal, Canada.He and his sister Grace, who was five years younger than Eric, were the children of a physician and a writer, David and Sara Gordon Bernstein.David Bernstein died in 1921, and the children were raised by their mother.
Bernstein attended Montreal's McGill University, graduating in 1931 and earning his M.D., C.M. in 1935.While at McGill he wrote for several student newspapers using pseudonyms. He followed graduation with a residency in psychiatry at Yale University, where he studied psychoanalysis under Paul Federn.
In 1943 he changed his legal name to Eric Berne.He continued to use pseudonyms, such as Cyprian St. Cyr ("Cyprian Sincere"), for whimsical articles in the Transactional Analysis Bulletin.
Berne's training was interrupted by World War II and his service in the Army Medical Corps, where he was promoted to the rank of Major. After working at Bushnell Army Hospital in Ogden, Utah, he was discharged in 1945.
Bernstein attended Montreal's McGill University, graduating in 1931 and earning his M.D., C.M. in 1935.While at McGill he wrote for several student newspapers using pseudonyms. He followed graduation with a residency in psychiatry at Yale University, where he studied psychoanalysis under Paul Federn.
In 1943 he changed his legal name to Eric Berne.He continued to use pseudonyms, such as Cyprian St. Cyr ("Cyprian Sincere"), for whimsical articles in the Transactional Analysis Bulletin.
Berne's training was interrupted by World War II and his service in the Army Medical Corps, where he was promoted to the rank of Major. After working at Bushnell Army Hospital in Ogden, Utah, he was discharged in 1945.
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September 18, 2007
i'm currently reading the 1960-something edition of this book although there is a 1996 edition. it really doesn't matter. i feel like i've found the holy grail. i know y'all's games bitches! that means ima gonna win! fuck yea! eat my metaphoric, insinuating, quadruple entendre shorts!
...no really, i'm learning some heavy shit about human relationships...
...no really, i'm learning some heavy shit about human relationships...
October 28, 2010
In this book, Berne argues that a lot of the behaviour you see around you every day can best be understood as different kinds of "games". A game is a pattern of behaviour usually involving two or perhaps three people. There is a series of interactions, followed by an emotional payoff.
One of the things I found most interesting is that the classification has two dimensions. First, there's the game itself. Second, there's the question of how seriously you're playing: he divides this into First Degree, Second Degree and Third Degree. First Degree is just playing for fun. Second Degree means people's feelings can be badly hurt. Third Degree means that the game ends up "in the courts, the hospital or the morgue."
So let me give you an example. There's this game he calls RAPO (one of the most appealing aspects of the book is the witty labels he's made up for the different games). First Degree RAPO is a game you can see being played at almost any party. The first person, most often a woman, flirts with the second person, most often a man, until he expresses some concrete sexual interest. Then she frowns and moves on, leaving him feeling like a bit of a jerk. Her payoff is satisfaction that she's managed to discomfit him and reassurance that she has sexual power, but it's basically harmless.
In Second Degree RAPO, the first party leads the second party on until, again, he's made some kind of advances. Then she gets openly indignant. Maybe she tells him loudly to keep his hands off her, or she phones her friends and says that he's such a lecherous creep. Second Degree RAPO is a pretty nasty game, because it is of course impossible for third parties to know whether the accusations are true or not. Maybe the guy is just a lecherous creep.
In Third Degree RAPO, the first party may get as far as having consensual sex with the second party. She then calls the police and formally accuses him of rape. Third Degree RAPO is, fortunately, not that common. It's clear that it can easily destroy people's lives.
I thought it was insightful to point out that all of these are essentially the same thing: the difference is quantitative, not qualitative. I don't buy his analysis completely. But if he doesn't succeed in alerting you to a least a couple of games you're playing without realising it, then I really envy your ability to understand yourself and the things that motivate you.
One of the things I found most interesting is that the classification has two dimensions. First, there's the game itself. Second, there's the question of how seriously you're playing: he divides this into First Degree, Second Degree and Third Degree. First Degree is just playing for fun. Second Degree means people's feelings can be badly hurt. Third Degree means that the game ends up "in the courts, the hospital or the morgue."
So let me give you an example. There's this game he calls RAPO (one of the most appealing aspects of the book is the witty labels he's made up for the different games). First Degree RAPO is a game you can see being played at almost any party. The first person, most often a woman, flirts with the second person, most often a man, until he expresses some concrete sexual interest. Then she frowns and moves on, leaving him feeling like a bit of a jerk. Her payoff is satisfaction that she's managed to discomfit him and reassurance that she has sexual power, but it's basically harmless.
In Second Degree RAPO, the first party leads the second party on until, again, he's made some kind of advances. Then she gets openly indignant. Maybe she tells him loudly to keep his hands off her, or she phones her friends and says that he's such a lecherous creep. Second Degree RAPO is a pretty nasty game, because it is of course impossible for third parties to know whether the accusations are true or not. Maybe the guy is just a lecherous creep.
In Third Degree RAPO, the first party may get as far as having consensual sex with the second party. She then calls the police and formally accuses him of rape. Third Degree RAPO is, fortunately, not that common. It's clear that it can easily destroy people's lives.
I thought it was insightful to point out that all of these are essentially the same thing: the difference is quantitative, not qualitative. I don't buy his analysis completely. But if he doesn't succeed in alerting you to a least a couple of games you're playing without realising it, then I really envy your ability to understand yourself and the things that motivate you.
October 5, 2021
Games People play: the psychology of human relationships, 1966, Eric Berne, Esmail Fassih (translator)
Games People Play: The Psychology of Human Relationships is a bestselling 1964 book by psychiatrist Eric Berne. In the first half of the book, Berne introduces transactional analysis as a way of interpreting social interactions.
He describes three roles or ego states, known as the Parent, the Adult, and the Child, and postulates that many negative behaviors can be traced to switching or confusion of these roles. He discusses procedures, rituals, and pastimes in social behavior, in light of this method of analysis. For example, a boss who talks to his staff as a controlling 'parent' will often engender self-abased obedience, tantrums, or other childlike responses from his employees.
The second half of the book catalogs a series of "mind games" in which people interact through a patterned and predictable series of "transactions" which are superficially plausible (that is, they may appear normal to bystanders or even to the people involved), but which actually conceal motivations, include private significance to the parties involved, and lead to a well-defined predictable outcome, usually counterproductive.
The book uses casual, often humorous phrases such as "See What You Made Me Do," "Why Don't You 鈥� Yes But," and "Ain't It Awful" as a way of briefly describing each game. In reality, the "winner" of a mind game is the person that returns to the Adult ego-state first.
鬲丕乇蹖禺 賳禺爻鬲蹖賳 禺賵丕賳卮: 賲丕賴 賲丕乇爻 爻丕賱 2002賲蹖賱丕丿蹖
毓賳賵丕賳: 亘丕夭蹖 賴丕: 乇賵丕賳卮賳丕爻蹖 乇賵丕亘胤 丕賳爻丕賳蹖貨 賳賵蹖爻賳丿賴: 丕乇蹖讴 亘乇賳貨 亘乇诏乇丿丕賳 丕爻賲丕毓蹖賱 賮氐蹖丨貨 賲卮禺氐丕鬲 賳卮乇 鬲賴乇丕賳貙 匕賴賳 丌賵蹖夭貙 趩丕倬 賳禺爻鬲 1366貙 丿乇242氐貙 賳賲賵丿丕乇貙 賳賲丕蹖賴貙 讴鬲丕亘賳丕賲賴貙 趩丕倬 亘蹖爻鬲賲 倬丕蹖蹖夭 1393貨 卮丕亘讴 9789647390736貨 賲賵囟賵毓 乇賵丕賳卮賳賱爻蹖 乇賵丕亘胤 丕賳爻丕賳蹖貙 乇賵丕亘胤 亘蹖賳 丕卮禺丕氐貙 乇賵丕亘胤 丕噩鬲賲丕毓蹖 丕夭 賳賵蹖爻賳丿诏丕賳 讴丕賳丕丿丕 - 爻丿賴 20賲
亘乇诏乇丿丕賳 讴鬲丕亘蹖 丕夭 芦丕乇蹖讴 亘乇賳禄貙 丿乇 亘丕乇賴 蹖 芦乇賵丕賳卮賳丕爻蹖 乇賵丕亘胤 丕賳爻丕賳蹖禄 丕爻鬲貨 丕賳爻丕賳 亘賴 毓賳賵丕賳 蹖讴 賲賵噩賵丿 丕噩鬲賲丕毓蹖貙 倬蹖趩蹖丿诏蹖鈥屬囏й� 乇賮鬲丕乇蹖 亘爻蹖丕乇蹖 丿丕乇丿貙 丕賳爻丕賳鈥屬囏� 賵丕亘爻鬲賴 亘賴 芦噩睾乇丕賮蹖丕禄貙 芦跇賳鬲蹖讴禄貙 芦賳賵毓 鬲乇亘蹖鬲禄貙 賵 趩賳丿蹖賳 賵 趩賳丿 倬丕乇丕賲鬲乇 丿蹖诏乇貙 乇賮鬲丕乇賴丕蹖 賲鬲賮丕賵鬲蹖 乇丕貙 丿乇 亘乇丕亘乇 毓賵丕賲賱 诏賵賳丕诏賵賳 丿乇 倬蹖卮 賲蹖鈥屭屫辟嗀� 賵 亘賴 卮乇丕蹖胤 丕噩鬲賲丕毓蹖 诏賵賳丕诏賵賳貙 毓讴爻 丕賱毓賲賱鈥屬囏й� 丿蹖诏乇诏賵賳賴 賳卮丕賳 賲蹖鈥屫囐嗀� 丕賳爻丕賳 丕賲乇賵夭 亘爻蹖丕乇 丕噩鬲賲丕毓蹖 丕爻鬲貙 賵 丿丕蹖乇賴鈥� 蹖 乇賵丕亘胤卮 丕夭 賲丨丿賵丿賴鈥� 蹖 芦禺丕賳賵丕丿賴禄貙 芦賳夭丿蹖讴丕賳禄貙 賵 丨鬲蹖 芦賲丨賱 夭賳丿诏蹖禄貙 亘爻蹖丕乇 賮乇丕鬲乇 乇賮鬲賴 丕爻鬲貨 乇賵丕亘胤 丕賳爻丕賳蹖 丕賲乇賵夭貙 讴丕乇亘乇丿賴丕蹖蹖 丿乇 芦爻蹖丕爻鬲芦貙 芦丕賯鬲氐丕丿禄貙 芦賮乇賴賳诏禄貙 賵 丿蹖诏乇 芦賲爻丕卅賱 讴賱丕賳 噩丕賲毓賴禄 丿丕乇丿貙 丕賳爻丕賳 丕賲乇賵夭貙 亘乇丕蹖 丿丕卮鬲賳 乇賵丕亘胤 爻丕賱賲 賵 倬賵蹖丕貨 丕丨鬲蹖丕噩 丿丕乇丿貙 亘賴 丿乇讴 氐丨蹖丨蹖貙 丕夭 禺賵丿卮 亘乇爻丿貙 鬲丕 爻倬爻 亘鬲賵丕賳丿貙 丿蹖诏乇 丕賳爻丕賳鈥屬囏� 乇丕 賳蹖夭貙 亘賴鬲乇 丿乇讴 讴賳丿貙 賵 賲爻蹖乇蹖 亘乇丕蹖 丕蹖噩丕丿 乇賵丕亘胤 爻丕賱賲貙 賵 讴丕乇丌賲丿 亘爻丕夭丿貨 芦丕乇蹖讴 亘乇賳禄 賳馗乇蹖賴 蹖 芦鬲丨賱蹖賱 乇賮鬲丕乇 賲鬲賯丕亘賱禄 乇丕 丕乇丕卅賴 丿丕丿賴 丕賳丿貙 讴賴 賲蹖鈥屫堌з� 丕蹖賳 賳馗乇蹖賴 乇丕 丿丕卮鬲賳 讴賱蹖丿 乇賵丕亘胤 丕賳爻丕賳蹖 爻丕賱賲 丿丕賳爻鬲貨 丕诏乇 毓賱丕賯賲賳丿 賴爻鬲蹖丿 亘賴 夭亘丕賳蹖 爻丕丿賴 賵 诏賵蹖丕貙 賵 亘賴 丿賵乇 丕夭 倬蹖趩蹖丿诏蹖鈥屬囏й� 賵蹖跇賴 蹖 丕氐胤賱丕丨丕鬲 乇賵丕賳卮賳丕爻蹖貙 丿乇亘丕乇賴鈥� 蹖 丕蹖賳 賲爻卅賱賴貙 亘蹖卮鬲乇 亘丿丕賳蹖丿貙 賵 乇丕賴 丨賱鈥屬囏й� 賲賳丕爻亘貙 賵 讴丕賲賱蹖 亘乇丕蹖 亘賴亘賵丿 乇賵丕亘胤鬲丕賳貙 倬蹖丿丕 讴賳蹖丿貙貨 讴鬲丕亘 芦亘丕夭蹖鈥屬囏� 乇賵丕賳卮賳丕爻蹖 乇賵丕亘胤 丕賳爻丕賳蹖貙 丕孬乇 芦丕乇蹖讴 亘乇賳禄 乇丕賴賳賲丕蹖 亘爻蹖丕乇 禺賵亘蹖 亘乇丕蹖 卮賲丕蹖丕賳 禺賵丕賴丿 亘賵丿
鬲丕乇蹖禺 亘賴賳诏丕賲 乇爻丕賳蹖 29/08/1399賴噩乇蹖 禺賵乇卮蹖丿蹖貨 12/07/1400賴噩乇蹖 禺賵乇卮蹖丿蹖貨 丕. 卮乇亘蹖丕賳蹖
Games People Play: The Psychology of Human Relationships is a bestselling 1964 book by psychiatrist Eric Berne. In the first half of the book, Berne introduces transactional analysis as a way of interpreting social interactions.
He describes three roles or ego states, known as the Parent, the Adult, and the Child, and postulates that many negative behaviors can be traced to switching or confusion of these roles. He discusses procedures, rituals, and pastimes in social behavior, in light of this method of analysis. For example, a boss who talks to his staff as a controlling 'parent' will often engender self-abased obedience, tantrums, or other childlike responses from his employees.
The second half of the book catalogs a series of "mind games" in which people interact through a patterned and predictable series of "transactions" which are superficially plausible (that is, they may appear normal to bystanders or even to the people involved), but which actually conceal motivations, include private significance to the parties involved, and lead to a well-defined predictable outcome, usually counterproductive.
The book uses casual, often humorous phrases such as "See What You Made Me Do," "Why Don't You 鈥� Yes But," and "Ain't It Awful" as a way of briefly describing each game. In reality, the "winner" of a mind game is the person that returns to the Adult ego-state first.
鬲丕乇蹖禺 賳禺爻鬲蹖賳 禺賵丕賳卮: 賲丕賴 賲丕乇爻 爻丕賱 2002賲蹖賱丕丿蹖
毓賳賵丕賳: 亘丕夭蹖 賴丕: 乇賵丕賳卮賳丕爻蹖 乇賵丕亘胤 丕賳爻丕賳蹖貨 賳賵蹖爻賳丿賴: 丕乇蹖讴 亘乇賳貨 亘乇诏乇丿丕賳 丕爻賲丕毓蹖賱 賮氐蹖丨貨 賲卮禺氐丕鬲 賳卮乇 鬲賴乇丕賳貙 匕賴賳 丌賵蹖夭貙 趩丕倬 賳禺爻鬲 1366貙 丿乇242氐貙 賳賲賵丿丕乇貙 賳賲丕蹖賴貙 讴鬲丕亘賳丕賲賴貙 趩丕倬 亘蹖爻鬲賲 倬丕蹖蹖夭 1393貨 卮丕亘讴 9789647390736貨 賲賵囟賵毓 乇賵丕賳卮賳賱爻蹖 乇賵丕亘胤 丕賳爻丕賳蹖貙 乇賵丕亘胤 亘蹖賳 丕卮禺丕氐貙 乇賵丕亘胤 丕噩鬲賲丕毓蹖 丕夭 賳賵蹖爻賳丿诏丕賳 讴丕賳丕丿丕 - 爻丿賴 20賲
亘乇诏乇丿丕賳 讴鬲丕亘蹖 丕夭 芦丕乇蹖讴 亘乇賳禄貙 丿乇 亘丕乇賴 蹖 芦乇賵丕賳卮賳丕爻蹖 乇賵丕亘胤 丕賳爻丕賳蹖禄 丕爻鬲貨 丕賳爻丕賳 亘賴 毓賳賵丕賳 蹖讴 賲賵噩賵丿 丕噩鬲賲丕毓蹖貙 倬蹖趩蹖丿诏蹖鈥屬囏й� 乇賮鬲丕乇蹖 亘爻蹖丕乇蹖 丿丕乇丿貙 丕賳爻丕賳鈥屬囏� 賵丕亘爻鬲賴 亘賴 芦噩睾乇丕賮蹖丕禄貙 芦跇賳鬲蹖讴禄貙 芦賳賵毓 鬲乇亘蹖鬲禄貙 賵 趩賳丿蹖賳 賵 趩賳丿 倬丕乇丕賲鬲乇 丿蹖诏乇貙 乇賮鬲丕乇賴丕蹖 賲鬲賮丕賵鬲蹖 乇丕貙 丿乇 亘乇丕亘乇 毓賵丕賲賱 诏賵賳丕诏賵賳 丿乇 倬蹖卮 賲蹖鈥屭屫辟嗀� 賵 亘賴 卮乇丕蹖胤 丕噩鬲賲丕毓蹖 诏賵賳丕诏賵賳貙 毓讴爻 丕賱毓賲賱鈥屬囏й� 丿蹖诏乇诏賵賳賴 賳卮丕賳 賲蹖鈥屫囐嗀� 丕賳爻丕賳 丕賲乇賵夭 亘爻蹖丕乇 丕噩鬲賲丕毓蹖 丕爻鬲貙 賵 丿丕蹖乇賴鈥� 蹖 乇賵丕亘胤卮 丕夭 賲丨丿賵丿賴鈥� 蹖 芦禺丕賳賵丕丿賴禄貙 芦賳夭丿蹖讴丕賳禄貙 賵 丨鬲蹖 芦賲丨賱 夭賳丿诏蹖禄貙 亘爻蹖丕乇 賮乇丕鬲乇 乇賮鬲賴 丕爻鬲貨 乇賵丕亘胤 丕賳爻丕賳蹖 丕賲乇賵夭貙 讴丕乇亘乇丿賴丕蹖蹖 丿乇 芦爻蹖丕爻鬲芦貙 芦丕賯鬲氐丕丿禄貙 芦賮乇賴賳诏禄貙 賵 丿蹖诏乇 芦賲爻丕卅賱 讴賱丕賳 噩丕賲毓賴禄 丿丕乇丿貙 丕賳爻丕賳 丕賲乇賵夭貙 亘乇丕蹖 丿丕卮鬲賳 乇賵丕亘胤 爻丕賱賲 賵 倬賵蹖丕貨 丕丨鬲蹖丕噩 丿丕乇丿貙 亘賴 丿乇讴 氐丨蹖丨蹖貙 丕夭 禺賵丿卮 亘乇爻丿貙 鬲丕 爻倬爻 亘鬲賵丕賳丿貙 丿蹖诏乇 丕賳爻丕賳鈥屬囏� 乇丕 賳蹖夭貙 亘賴鬲乇 丿乇讴 讴賳丿貙 賵 賲爻蹖乇蹖 亘乇丕蹖 丕蹖噩丕丿 乇賵丕亘胤 爻丕賱賲貙 賵 讴丕乇丌賲丿 亘爻丕夭丿貨 芦丕乇蹖讴 亘乇賳禄 賳馗乇蹖賴 蹖 芦鬲丨賱蹖賱 乇賮鬲丕乇 賲鬲賯丕亘賱禄 乇丕 丕乇丕卅賴 丿丕丿賴 丕賳丿貙 讴賴 賲蹖鈥屫堌з� 丕蹖賳 賳馗乇蹖賴 乇丕 丿丕卮鬲賳 讴賱蹖丿 乇賵丕亘胤 丕賳爻丕賳蹖 爻丕賱賲 丿丕賳爻鬲貨 丕诏乇 毓賱丕賯賲賳丿 賴爻鬲蹖丿 亘賴 夭亘丕賳蹖 爻丕丿賴 賵 诏賵蹖丕貙 賵 亘賴 丿賵乇 丕夭 倬蹖趩蹖丿诏蹖鈥屬囏й� 賵蹖跇賴 蹖 丕氐胤賱丕丨丕鬲 乇賵丕賳卮賳丕爻蹖貙 丿乇亘丕乇賴鈥� 蹖 丕蹖賳 賲爻卅賱賴貙 亘蹖卮鬲乇 亘丿丕賳蹖丿貙 賵 乇丕賴 丨賱鈥屬囏й� 賲賳丕爻亘貙 賵 讴丕賲賱蹖 亘乇丕蹖 亘賴亘賵丿 乇賵丕亘胤鬲丕賳貙 倬蹖丿丕 讴賳蹖丿貙貨 讴鬲丕亘 芦亘丕夭蹖鈥屬囏� 乇賵丕賳卮賳丕爻蹖 乇賵丕亘胤 丕賳爻丕賳蹖貙 丕孬乇 芦丕乇蹖讴 亘乇賳禄 乇丕賴賳賲丕蹖 亘爻蹖丕乇 禺賵亘蹖 亘乇丕蹖 卮賲丕蹖丕賳 禺賵丕賴丿 亘賵丿
鬲丕乇蹖禺 亘賴賳诏丕賲 乇爻丕賳蹖 29/08/1399賴噩乇蹖 禺賵乇卮蹖丿蹖貨 12/07/1400賴噩乇蹖 禺賵乇卮蹖丿蹖貨 丕. 卮乇亘蹖丕賳蹖
March 10, 2025
The Games People Play in this woebegone world - especially as performed by those with life-and-death powers over us - rendered me and my workplace friend Muriel pusillanimous.
Are you "nervous in the service?" My good friend Muriel - back in the "Don't know if I'm punched, bored or reamed " 1980's when we were lowly desk-mates - coined that phrase.
We certainly were.
I was a loser like her - but had no idea senior management was keeping close tabs on me, with an eye to career acceleration. I didn't see that they were playing Games People Play with me too.
I thought their alternating glares 'n grins were polite but distanced disciplinary management tools.
But there was MUCH more to it than that. INFINITELY more. And I had always avoided power, as a curse - an incentive to sketchy behaviour! As I say I was pusillanimous, not being a player.
So my aversion to sketchiness led me in the end to the Christian Faith.
Berne started out by positing that we can be treated as a child in a relationship paternalistically or maternalistically - or treated as an Adult. In the first mode the little guys are judged or loved - in the third, just respected.
Here is where Transactional Analysis tried to Transcend Freud. Gone are our transactional quagmires if we're 'adult' about them.
Presto - in one flash of the magic wand we're forgiven. Even-tempered and happy.
But Freud said we should Still Feel Guilty, like me and Muriel. Until we accept our nothingness. Freud is right. At least that's a step towards faith. And a step that will hound us ALL into the Afterlife!
Berne is right ONLY in a superficial sense. But only that. Otherwise, he is a little dumb...
Life is deep. T.S. Eliot warns us to "gently dip" (into the subject) - "but not too deep." Otherwise, you'll find yourself enmired - like the explorers who set out for the New World - in a Sargasso Sea of self-doubts.
THIS IS NO JOKE. Be careful what you take away from what, in the end, you will see to have been too many leading questions in this book. Don't go there.
Instead, savour, as you skim this book, its "aha!" Moments. There are some.
Many of us, like me and Muriel, have known what it is to fall between the cracks. We find ourselves " left-handed, lost." We are RIGHT, I'm afraid. We are all, say our churches, guilty.
We KNOW we're not OK, Because the World is Not OK.
God forgives. The world? Never, for those who feel fallen. The world judges them. Depressive folks will tell you Berne's a crock. He just puts a shiny, pop veneer on an old, tired world.
Muriel could relax a bit, once she had a fresh coffee from the office vending machine, by regaling me with her woebegone explorations with her Jewish analyst, Moses.
Moses was a serious therapist who persisted in trying to see her mental blockages. Alas - all Muriel and I took away from our therapists was the sheer angst of self-doubt. Do you see now why we were nervous in the service?
Life was no fun in Stress City - an apt handle for our jobs in the supply section. And no, we were not OK. The world had judged us.
Folks, people DO play games with you.
Many around us, like T.S. Eliot's "young man carbuncular" are ""assured of certain certanties."
Be careful.
Muriel was my confidante, and only chuckled with me, not at me. For she was a Believer. And she and her friend Robert renewed my faith for me.
So, through her good graces, I became an MCF member - a Christian group that met weekly for bible study and prayer.
And for Muriel and me, that seed of faith grew into an immense oak -
That sheltered us in the end from life's storms -
And, in our old age has given us shade from the Blazing Sun of Judgement.
Are you "nervous in the service?" My good friend Muriel - back in the "Don't know if I'm punched, bored or reamed " 1980's when we were lowly desk-mates - coined that phrase.
We certainly were.
I was a loser like her - but had no idea senior management was keeping close tabs on me, with an eye to career acceleration. I didn't see that they were playing Games People Play with me too.
I thought their alternating glares 'n grins were polite but distanced disciplinary management tools.
But there was MUCH more to it than that. INFINITELY more. And I had always avoided power, as a curse - an incentive to sketchy behaviour! As I say I was pusillanimous, not being a player.
So my aversion to sketchiness led me in the end to the Christian Faith.
Berne started out by positing that we can be treated as a child in a relationship paternalistically or maternalistically - or treated as an Adult. In the first mode the little guys are judged or loved - in the third, just respected.
Here is where Transactional Analysis tried to Transcend Freud. Gone are our transactional quagmires if we're 'adult' about them.
Presto - in one flash of the magic wand we're forgiven. Even-tempered and happy.
But Freud said we should Still Feel Guilty, like me and Muriel. Until we accept our nothingness. Freud is right. At least that's a step towards faith. And a step that will hound us ALL into the Afterlife!
Berne is right ONLY in a superficial sense. But only that. Otherwise, he is a little dumb...
Life is deep. T.S. Eliot warns us to "gently dip" (into the subject) - "but not too deep." Otherwise, you'll find yourself enmired - like the explorers who set out for the New World - in a Sargasso Sea of self-doubts.
THIS IS NO JOKE. Be careful what you take away from what, in the end, you will see to have been too many leading questions in this book. Don't go there.
Instead, savour, as you skim this book, its "aha!" Moments. There are some.
Many of us, like me and Muriel, have known what it is to fall between the cracks. We find ourselves " left-handed, lost." We are RIGHT, I'm afraid. We are all, say our churches, guilty.
We KNOW we're not OK, Because the World is Not OK.
God forgives. The world? Never, for those who feel fallen. The world judges them. Depressive folks will tell you Berne's a crock. He just puts a shiny, pop veneer on an old, tired world.
Muriel could relax a bit, once she had a fresh coffee from the office vending machine, by regaling me with her woebegone explorations with her Jewish analyst, Moses.
Moses was a serious therapist who persisted in trying to see her mental blockages. Alas - all Muriel and I took away from our therapists was the sheer angst of self-doubt. Do you see now why we were nervous in the service?
Life was no fun in Stress City - an apt handle for our jobs in the supply section. And no, we were not OK. The world had judged us.
Folks, people DO play games with you.
Many around us, like T.S. Eliot's "young man carbuncular" are ""assured of certain certanties."
Be careful.
Muriel was my confidante, and only chuckled with me, not at me. For she was a Believer. And she and her friend Robert renewed my faith for me.
So, through her good graces, I became an MCF member - a Christian group that met weekly for bible study and prayer.
And for Muriel and me, that seed of faith grew into an immense oak -
That sheltered us in the end from life's storms -
And, in our old age has given us shade from the Blazing Sun of Judgement.
August 4, 2014
Games People Play has a good chapter about dealing with alcoholics, but Berne's ideas (and I do mean ideas) about women and homosexuals are disgusting and sexist. This book was published in the 1960s and it shows. Scary to think modern psychologists might actually use it as a text or that college students would have to listen to Berne's ugly ideas about women and gays. Nowadays we use research, not "ideas."
January 19, 2015
This was apparently a very big thing when it was published in the 70s, and I can see why. It鈥檚 a very interesting way of viewing the world. Unfortunately, like many psychology theories, it takes what is a clever conceit that explains some odd aspects of human interaction and then tries to apply it to everything regardless of whether it fits or not. Add in some very seventies thought processes (which are rather out of favor at the moment but the author probably thought of as universal without realizing how much was a product of the time), and you end up with a rather dated, if still interesting, book.
The thesis is that whenever you see people engaged in repetitive interactions that appear to be negative, they鈥檙e probably getting something out of it subconsciously. So while someone in a controlling relationship complains about how much their partner limits them, they secretly both enjoy having something to complain about and are actually afraid of the thing they鈥檙e being forbidden鈥攖he reason they chose this partner in the first place is to have an excuse not to have to do the forbidden thing.
The book then goes on to identify a few dozen of these 鈥済ames鈥�. Most of them are very familiar, and it鈥檚 a fruitful way of examining interactions. In applicable cases, it not only provides some reasonable explanations for behaviors that seem inexplicable on the surface, getting to the root of the game offers a way to actually break the pattern. If you鈥檙e game playing to feed a deep desire, trying to curtail the surface behavior without addressing the root of the desire will not be particularly effective.
However, I think most modern psychologists would say that a number of the games identified have more root causes than this text makes out. The attempt to extrapolate the theory to apply to all behavior oversimplifies things. Just as bad, a number of the observations are deeply sexist, racist, and/or homophobic鈥攙ery much products of the time. Furthermore, there鈥檚 an attempt to apply a Freudian framework that I鈥檓 pretty sure has been mostly discredited by the scientific community in the intervening decades. (Every problem does not need to be classified as phallic, oral, or anal. Really.)
So it鈥檚 an interesting work with some still-applicable ideas. Just don鈥檛 try to apply them too hard.
The thesis is that whenever you see people engaged in repetitive interactions that appear to be negative, they鈥檙e probably getting something out of it subconsciously. So while someone in a controlling relationship complains about how much their partner limits them, they secretly both enjoy having something to complain about and are actually afraid of the thing they鈥檙e being forbidden鈥攖he reason they chose this partner in the first place is to have an excuse not to have to do the forbidden thing.
The book then goes on to identify a few dozen of these 鈥済ames鈥�. Most of them are very familiar, and it鈥檚 a fruitful way of examining interactions. In applicable cases, it not only provides some reasonable explanations for behaviors that seem inexplicable on the surface, getting to the root of the game offers a way to actually break the pattern. If you鈥檙e game playing to feed a deep desire, trying to curtail the surface behavior without addressing the root of the desire will not be particularly effective.
However, I think most modern psychologists would say that a number of the games identified have more root causes than this text makes out. The attempt to extrapolate the theory to apply to all behavior oversimplifies things. Just as bad, a number of the observations are deeply sexist, racist, and/or homophobic鈥攙ery much products of the time. Furthermore, there鈥檚 an attempt to apply a Freudian framework that I鈥檓 pretty sure has been mostly discredited by the scientific community in the intervening decades. (Every problem does not need to be classified as phallic, oral, or anal. Really.)
So it鈥檚 an interesting work with some still-applicable ideas. Just don鈥檛 try to apply them too hard.
July 26, 2023
The games referred to aren't actual games.
Duh.
They're the things we do, without realizing why we're doing them, that fills a need in our lives. It may not be a healthy need but it's a need that we think we...need?
You know what I mean.
Transactional Analysis is something Berne came up with to describe this behavior in the 1950s, and it's still in use.
The basic gist is that your interactions and conversations all have a deeper psychological meaning.
A lot of the mumbo-jumbo (when you behave as the Parent, the Child, the Adult) seems like utter horseshit to me. However, I think it's only fair to admit that it's probably valid. It's just that I think it sounds dumb when you say stuff like that out loud.
But I'm trying to grow as a person, goddammit.
What I'm trying to convey is that your mileage may vary with some of the things presented in this book, depending on how touchy-feely you are.
Now, some of it is so old-fashioned that I did the lol thing. Frigid women and perverted homosexuals...dear god. But there were chords of things that I have seen in my own life experiences that made me go WHOA! - I know that person or have had that conversation.
I didn't expect to take much away from a psychology book written in 1964, but I did actually find a few nuggets of wisdom and a teeny bit of insight.
And that's really all I hope for with books like these.
Recommended. Ish.
Duh.
They're the things we do, without realizing why we're doing them, that fills a need in our lives. It may not be a healthy need but it's a need that we think we...need?
You know what I mean.
Transactional Analysis is something Berne came up with to describe this behavior in the 1950s, and it's still in use.
The basic gist is that your interactions and conversations all have a deeper psychological meaning.
A lot of the mumbo-jumbo (when you behave as the Parent, the Child, the Adult) seems like utter horseshit to me. However, I think it's only fair to admit that it's probably valid. It's just that I think it sounds dumb when you say stuff like that out loud.
But I'm trying to grow as a person, goddammit.
What I'm trying to convey is that your mileage may vary with some of the things presented in this book, depending on how touchy-feely you are.
Now, some of it is so old-fashioned that I did the lol thing. Frigid women and perverted homosexuals...dear god. But there were chords of things that I have seen in my own life experiences that made me go WHOA! - I know that person or have had that conversation.
I didn't expect to take much away from a psychology book written in 1964, but I did actually find a few nuggets of wisdom and a teeny bit of insight.
And that's really all I hope for with books like these.
Recommended. Ish.
November 18, 2011
I鈥檓 glad I read it, but it wasn鈥檛 ultimately everything that I wanted it to be.
The theory at the beginning was absolutely fascinating and, even though the books itself is from the 1960鈥檚, it has significant value for being the start of the field of transactional psychology.
However, the description of the games themselves was where I found the book lacking. Mostly, this is where I also felt the impact of the book being so dated. Some of his descriptions of games were based on stereotypical gender behavior of that time, but would not be accurate now, nor would his analysis. However, I think that a lot could still be learned even from those games if he had gone into further analysis, but he didn鈥檛. He names the game, goes through a brief write-up, but doesn鈥檛 really delve in. What I wanted was to get the description of the game, see an example provided by an analysis, then see an example of the antithesis with similar analysis. Only once does he provide an example of an antithesis.
Possibly this analysis that was missing for me could be found in other supplemental psychological texts or in a class discussion in which this book was assigned. However, for someone who is reading on their own for only their own personal benefit, it was lacking. Still, this is the historical beginning from which transactional theory arose and, learning about transactional theory for the first time, it was an incredible read.
The theory at the beginning was absolutely fascinating and, even though the books itself is from the 1960鈥檚, it has significant value for being the start of the field of transactional psychology.
However, the description of the games themselves was where I found the book lacking. Mostly, this is where I also felt the impact of the book being so dated. Some of his descriptions of games were based on stereotypical gender behavior of that time, but would not be accurate now, nor would his analysis. However, I think that a lot could still be learned even from those games if he had gone into further analysis, but he didn鈥檛. He names the game, goes through a brief write-up, but doesn鈥檛 really delve in. What I wanted was to get the description of the game, see an example provided by an analysis, then see an example of the antithesis with similar analysis. Only once does he provide an example of an antithesis.
Possibly this analysis that was missing for me could be found in other supplemental psychological texts or in a class discussion in which this book was assigned. However, for someone who is reading on their own for only their own personal benefit, it was lacking. Still, this is the historical beginning from which transactional theory arose and, learning about transactional theory for the first time, it was an incredible read.
October 5, 2012
I found the general concept an interesting metaphor (rather than a scientifically proven social reality). However, I struggled to finish the book. It felt like a series of scribbled notes thrown together - a set of index cards with brief information on 'games'. I needed further explanation and an attempt to engage me rather than having a series of ideas thrown before me.
December 17, 2015
亘丕 禺賵賳丿賳 丕蹖賳 讴鬲丕亘 賲鬲賵噩賴 卮丿賲 讴賴 趩賯丿乇 鬲賵蹖 夭賳丿诏蹖 亘賴 亘丕夭蹖 诏乇賮鬲賴 卮丿賲 賵 禺賵丿丌诏丕賴 蹖丕 賳丕 禺賵丿丌诏丕賴 丿蹖诏乇丕賳 乇賵 亘丕夭蹖 丿丕丿賲!!
丿乇 丕蹖賳 讴鬲丕亘 "丕乇蹖讴 亘乇賳" 賮乇囟蹖賴 丕蹖 亘賴 賳丕賲 "丨丕賱丕鬲 賲賳" 丿乇 禺氐賵氐 丨丕賱鬲 賴丕蹖 乇賵丕賳蹖 賮乇丿 乇賵 賲胤乇丨 賲蹖 讴賳賴 讴賴 卮丕賲賱 "賵丕賱丿"貙"亘丕賱睾" 賵 "讴賵丿讴" 丕爻鬲 賵 亘毓丿 賳馗乇蹖賴 亘丕夭蹖 賴丕 乇賵 亘乇 丕爻丕爻 賴賲蹖賳 丨丕賱丕鬲 賲毓乇賮蹖 賲蹖讴賳賴 讴賴 賴乇 卮禺氐 亘丕 讴丿賵賲 丨丕賱鬲 禺賵丿卮 賵丕乇丿 丕蹖賳 亘丕夭蹖 賴丕 賲蹖卮賴.亘丕夭蹖 乇卮鬲賴 丕蹖 丨乇讴鬲 丕爻鬲 亘丕 丿丕賲 賵 讴賱讴 讴賴 鬲丕 乇爻蹖丿賳 亘賴 賳鬲蹖噩賴 倬蹖卮 賲蹖 乇賵丿 賵 丿乇 丌賳 丨鬲賲丕 亘乇丿 賲胤乇丨 丕爻鬲.
丿乇 亘禺卮 丿賵賲 讴鬲丕亘 賳賵蹖爻賳丿賴 亘賴 亘丕夭蹖 賴丕蹖 賲毓賲賵賱 亘蹖賳 丌丿賲 賴丕 賲蹖 倬乇丿丕夭賴 讴賴 噩丕賱亘 鬲乇蹖賳 亘禺卮 讴鬲丕亘 賴爻鬲 賵 丕蹖賳 亘丕夭蹖 賴丕 乇賵 亘賴 亘禺卮 賴丕蹖 賲禺鬲賱賮 丿爻鬲賴 亘賳丿蹖 賲蹖 讴賳賴 賲孬賱 "亘丕夭蹖 賴丕蹖 夭賳丿诏蹖" 蹖丕 "亘丕夭蹖 賴丕蹖 丕夭丿賵丕噩" 賵 ... 亘乇丕蹖 丕蹖賳 亘丕夭蹖 賴丕 丕爻丕賲蹖 噩丕賱亘蹖 乇賵 丕賳鬲禺丕亘 讴乇丿賴 賲孬賱 "丕诏乇 亘賴 禺丕胤乇 鬲賵 賳亘賵丿" 貙 "丨丕賱丕 诏蹖乇鬲 丌賵乇丿賲 倬丿乇 爻诏" 賵 "趩乇丕 賮賱丕賳 讴丕乇 乇丕賳賲蹖 讴賳蹖 - 丌乇賴貙 丕賲丕" 賵 .... 禺賵賳丿賳 丕蹖賳 讴鬲丕亘 鬲噩乇亘賴 亘爻蹖丕乇 噩丕賱亘蹖 亘賵丿 賲禺氐賵氐丕 丕蹖賳 讴賴 亘乇丕蹖 賴乇 亘丕夭蹖 蹖讴 "丌賳鬲蹖 鬲夭" 賳蹖夭 丕乇丕蹖賴 丿丕丿賴 亘賵丿 讴賴 丕賱亘鬲賴 賴賲蹖卮賴 賴賲 亘丿賵賳 毓賵丕賯亘 賳禺賵丕賴丿 亘賵丿 賵 趩賵賳 亘丕夭蹖 乇丕 亘賴 賴賲 夭丿賴 丕蹖賲 亘丕蹖丿 賲賳鬲馗乇 毓讴爻 丕賱毓賲賱 爻禺鬲 胤乇賮 賲賯丕亘賱 亘賵丿! 賯爻賲鬲 賴丕蹖蹖 丕夭 讴鬲丕亘 讴賲蹖 鬲禺氐氐蹖 亘賵丿 賵 賮讴乇 賲蹖 讴賳賲 亘乇丕蹖 賲鬲禺氐氐蹖賳 亘蹖卮鬲乇 賯丕亘賱 賮賴賲 丕爻鬲.
丿乇 丕蹖賳 讴鬲丕亘 "丕乇蹖讴 亘乇賳" 賮乇囟蹖賴 丕蹖 亘賴 賳丕賲 "丨丕賱丕鬲 賲賳" 丿乇 禺氐賵氐 丨丕賱鬲 賴丕蹖 乇賵丕賳蹖 賮乇丿 乇賵 賲胤乇丨 賲蹖 讴賳賴 讴賴 卮丕賲賱 "賵丕賱丿"貙"亘丕賱睾" 賵 "讴賵丿讴" 丕爻鬲 賵 亘毓丿 賳馗乇蹖賴 亘丕夭蹖 賴丕 乇賵 亘乇 丕爻丕爻 賴賲蹖賳 丨丕賱丕鬲 賲毓乇賮蹖 賲蹖讴賳賴 讴賴 賴乇 卮禺氐 亘丕 讴丿賵賲 丨丕賱鬲 禺賵丿卮 賵丕乇丿 丕蹖賳 亘丕夭蹖 賴丕 賲蹖卮賴.亘丕夭蹖 乇卮鬲賴 丕蹖 丨乇讴鬲 丕爻鬲 亘丕 丿丕賲 賵 讴賱讴 讴賴 鬲丕 乇爻蹖丿賳 亘賴 賳鬲蹖噩賴 倬蹖卮 賲蹖 乇賵丿 賵 丿乇 丌賳 丨鬲賲丕 亘乇丿 賲胤乇丨 丕爻鬲.
丿乇 亘禺卮 丿賵賲 讴鬲丕亘 賳賵蹖爻賳丿賴 亘賴 亘丕夭蹖 賴丕蹖 賲毓賲賵賱 亘蹖賳 丌丿賲 賴丕 賲蹖 倬乇丿丕夭賴 讴賴 噩丕賱亘 鬲乇蹖賳 亘禺卮 讴鬲丕亘 賴爻鬲 賵 丕蹖賳 亘丕夭蹖 賴丕 乇賵 亘賴 亘禺卮 賴丕蹖 賲禺鬲賱賮 丿爻鬲賴 亘賳丿蹖 賲蹖 讴賳賴 賲孬賱 "亘丕夭蹖 賴丕蹖 夭賳丿诏蹖" 蹖丕 "亘丕夭蹖 賴丕蹖 丕夭丿賵丕噩" 賵 ... 亘乇丕蹖 丕蹖賳 亘丕夭蹖 賴丕 丕爻丕賲蹖 噩丕賱亘蹖 乇賵 丕賳鬲禺丕亘 讴乇丿賴 賲孬賱 "丕诏乇 亘賴 禺丕胤乇 鬲賵 賳亘賵丿" 貙 "丨丕賱丕 诏蹖乇鬲 丌賵乇丿賲 倬丿乇 爻诏" 賵 "趩乇丕 賮賱丕賳 讴丕乇 乇丕賳賲蹖 讴賳蹖 - 丌乇賴貙 丕賲丕" 賵 .... 禺賵賳丿賳 丕蹖賳 讴鬲丕亘 鬲噩乇亘賴 亘爻蹖丕乇 噩丕賱亘蹖 亘賵丿 賲禺氐賵氐丕 丕蹖賳 讴賴 亘乇丕蹖 賴乇 亘丕夭蹖 蹖讴 "丌賳鬲蹖 鬲夭" 賳蹖夭 丕乇丕蹖賴 丿丕丿賴 亘賵丿 讴賴 丕賱亘鬲賴 賴賲蹖卮賴 賴賲 亘丿賵賳 毓賵丕賯亘 賳禺賵丕賴丿 亘賵丿 賵 趩賵賳 亘丕夭蹖 乇丕 亘賴 賴賲 夭丿賴 丕蹖賲 亘丕蹖丿 賲賳鬲馗乇 毓讴爻 丕賱毓賲賱 爻禺鬲 胤乇賮 賲賯丕亘賱 亘賵丿! 賯爻賲鬲 賴丕蹖蹖 丕夭 讴鬲丕亘 讴賲蹖 鬲禺氐氐蹖 亘賵丿 賵 賮讴乇 賲蹖 讴賳賲 亘乇丕蹖 賲鬲禺氐氐蹖賳 亘蹖卮鬲乇 賯丕亘賱 賮賴賲 丕爻鬲.
October 6, 2024
讴鬲丕亘 亘丕夭蹖鈥屬囏� 賳賵卮鬲賴鈥屰� 丕乇蹖讴 亘乇賳 亘丕 丕爻鬲賮丕丿賴 丕夭 賳馗乇蹖賴鈥屰� 鬲丨賱蹖賱 乇賮鬲丕乇 賲鬲賯丕亘賱 (TA) 亘賴 鬲賵囟蹖丨 賳丨賵賴鈥屰� 賵賯鬲鈥屭柏必з嗃� 賵 亘賴 賵蹖跇賴 亘丕夭蹖鈥屬囏й屰� 賲蹖鈥屬矩必ж操� 讴賴 丿乇 夭賳丿诏蹖 乇賵夭賲乇賴 鬲賵 丕乇鬲亘丕胤丕鬲賲賵賳 亘賴 氐賵乇鬲 賳丕禺賵丿丌诏丕賴 丕爻鬲賮丕丿賴 賲蹖鈥屭┵嗃屬�. 亘丕夭蹖鈥屬囏� 蹖讴 讴鬲丕亘 鬲禺氐氐蹖 乇賵丕賳卮賳丕爻蹖賴 讴賴 亘乇丕蹖 禺賵賳丿賳卮 亘丕蹖丿 丨鬲賲丕 丕夭 賳馗乇蹖賴鈥屰� 鬲丨賱蹖賱 乇賮鬲丕乇 賲鬲賯丕亘賱 丌诏丕賴蹖 丿丕卮鬲賴 亘丕卮蹖賲.
鬲賵 丕蹖賳 讴鬲丕亘貙 亘丕夭蹖鈥屬囏� 亘丕 丕爻賲鈥屬囏й� 禺賱丕賯丕賳賴鈥屫й� 鬲賵囟蹖丨 丿丕丿賴 賲蹖鈥屫促� 賵賱蹖 賳賵毓 鬲賵囟蹖丨丕鬲 賵 丿爻鬲賴鈥屫ㄙ嗀屸€屬囏� 賲亘賴賲 賴爻鬲賳. 賲孬賱丕 丿乇 丨丕賱 鬲賵囟蹖丨 蹖讴 亘丕夭蹖 讴賴 鬲蹖鬲乇 賲乇亘賵胤 亘賴 丕賵賳賴貙 丕夭 亘丕夭蹖鈥屬囏й屰� 丕爻賲 亘乇丿賴 賲蹖鈥屫促� 讴賴 賯亘賱卮 鬲賵 讴鬲丕亘 丕爻賲蹖 丕夭卮 賳蹖賵賲丿賴 賵 蹖丕 賵爻胤 蹖賴 亘丕夭蹖 亘賴 鬲賵囟蹖丨 丿乇 賲賵乇丿 亘丕夭蹖鈥屬囏й� 丿蹖诏賴 倬乇丿丕禺鬲賴 卮丿賴 讴賴 诏蹖噩 讴賳賳丿賴 賲蹖鈥屫促� 趩賵賳 賳賲蹖鈥屫促� 鬲賵 匕賴賳 亘賴 禺賵亘蹖 胤亘賯賴鈥屫ㄙ嗀屫� 讴乇丿.
賳讴鬲賴鈥屫й� 讴賴 丿乇 賲賵乇丿 丕蹖賳 讴鬲丕亘 禺蹖賱蹖 賲賴賲賴 丕蹖賳賴 讴賴 丕蹖賳 亘丕夭蹖鈥屬囏� 蹖賴 丕丨鬲賲丕賱 賴爻鬲賳 賵 賳賴 蹖賴 賯胤毓蹖鬲. 亘賴 賵蹖跇賴 禺賵丕賳賳丿诏丕賳 睾蹖乇 乇賵丕賳卮賳丕爻 亘丕蹖丿 丕蹖賳賵 亘丿賵賳賳 讴賴 賴乇 讴爻 亘賴 丕蹖賳 賳丨賵蹖 讴賴 鬲賵 讴鬲丕亘 鬲賵囟蹖丨 丿丕丿賴 卮丿賴 乇賮鬲丕乇 讴賳賴 賱夭賵賲丕 丿乇 丨丕賱 亘丕夭蹖 讴乇丿賳 賳蹖爻鬲 賵 賲賵丕馗亘 亘丕卮蹖賲 亘賴 讴爻蹖 亘乇趩爻亘 賳夭賳蹖賲.
亘賴 賳馗乇 賲賳 賲夭蹖鬲 丕蹖賳 讴鬲丕亘 亘蹖卮 丕夭 賴乇 趩蹖夭蹖 丿乇 丕蹖噩丕丿 卮賳丕禺鬲 賵 丌诏丕賴蹖 丕夭 乇賮鬲丕乇 禺賵丿賲賵賳 賴爻鬲 讴賴 亘亘蹖賳蹖賲 丕诏乇 丿乇 丨丕賱 亘丕夭蹖 賴爻鬲蹖賲 賳爻亘鬲 亘賴卮 亘蹖賳卮 倬蹖丿丕 讴賳蹖賲 賵 丿乇 鬲賱丕卮 亘丕卮蹖賲 賴賵卮蹖丕乇丕賳賴鈥屫� 夭賳丿诏蹖 讴賳蹖賲 賵 丕乇鬲亘丕胤丕鬲賲賵賳 乇賵 賵丕賯毓蹖鈥屫� 亘爻丕夭蹖賲.
鬲賵 丕蹖賳 讴鬲丕亘貙 亘丕夭蹖鈥屬囏� 亘丕 丕爻賲鈥屬囏й� 禺賱丕賯丕賳賴鈥屫й� 鬲賵囟蹖丨 丿丕丿賴 賲蹖鈥屫促� 賵賱蹖 賳賵毓 鬲賵囟蹖丨丕鬲 賵 丿爻鬲賴鈥屫ㄙ嗀屸€屬囏� 賲亘賴賲 賴爻鬲賳. 賲孬賱丕 丿乇 丨丕賱 鬲賵囟蹖丨 蹖讴 亘丕夭蹖 讴賴 鬲蹖鬲乇 賲乇亘賵胤 亘賴 丕賵賳賴貙 丕夭 亘丕夭蹖鈥屬囏й屰� 丕爻賲 亘乇丿賴 賲蹖鈥屫促� 讴賴 賯亘賱卮 鬲賵 讴鬲丕亘 丕爻賲蹖 丕夭卮 賳蹖賵賲丿賴 賵 蹖丕 賵爻胤 蹖賴 亘丕夭蹖 亘賴 鬲賵囟蹖丨 丿乇 賲賵乇丿 亘丕夭蹖鈥屬囏й� 丿蹖诏賴 倬乇丿丕禺鬲賴 卮丿賴 讴賴 诏蹖噩 讴賳賳丿賴 賲蹖鈥屫促� 趩賵賳 賳賲蹖鈥屫促� 鬲賵 匕賴賳 亘賴 禺賵亘蹖 胤亘賯賴鈥屫ㄙ嗀屫� 讴乇丿.
賳讴鬲賴鈥屫й� 讴賴 丿乇 賲賵乇丿 丕蹖賳 讴鬲丕亘 禺蹖賱蹖 賲賴賲賴 丕蹖賳賴 讴賴 丕蹖賳 亘丕夭蹖鈥屬囏� 蹖賴 丕丨鬲賲丕賱 賴爻鬲賳 賵 賳賴 蹖賴 賯胤毓蹖鬲. 亘賴 賵蹖跇賴 禺賵丕賳賳丿诏丕賳 睾蹖乇 乇賵丕賳卮賳丕爻 亘丕蹖丿 丕蹖賳賵 亘丿賵賳賳 讴賴 賴乇 讴爻 亘賴 丕蹖賳 賳丨賵蹖 讴賴 鬲賵 讴鬲丕亘 鬲賵囟蹖丨 丿丕丿賴 卮丿賴 乇賮鬲丕乇 讴賳賴 賱夭賵賲丕 丿乇 丨丕賱 亘丕夭蹖 讴乇丿賳 賳蹖爻鬲 賵 賲賵丕馗亘 亘丕卮蹖賲 亘賴 讴爻蹖 亘乇趩爻亘 賳夭賳蹖賲.
亘賴 賳馗乇 賲賳 賲夭蹖鬲 丕蹖賳 讴鬲丕亘 亘蹖卮 丕夭 賴乇 趩蹖夭蹖 丿乇 丕蹖噩丕丿 卮賳丕禺鬲 賵 丌诏丕賴蹖 丕夭 乇賮鬲丕乇 禺賵丿賲賵賳 賴爻鬲 讴賴 亘亘蹖賳蹖賲 丕诏乇 丿乇 丨丕賱 亘丕夭蹖 賴爻鬲蹖賲 賳爻亘鬲 亘賴卮 亘蹖賳卮 倬蹖丿丕 讴賳蹖賲 賵 丿乇 鬲賱丕卮 亘丕卮蹖賲 賴賵卮蹖丕乇丕賳賴鈥屫� 夭賳丿诏蹖 讴賳蹖賲 賵 丕乇鬲亘丕胤丕鬲賲賵賳 乇賵 賵丕賯毓蹖鈥屫� 亘爻丕夭蹖賲.
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September 14, 2019I find this book impossible to rate.
On one hand, it some had very insightful models about human behavior. For example, there is the notion of "strokes" - a metaphor for any social interaction in which one person acknowledges the existence of another. As the book defines them:
In the book's model, social rituals such as saying hello and asking "how are you" are reciprocal trades of strokes. Both of the people in question give each other some number of strokes, while maintaining an intuitive calculation of exactly how many strokes they owe each other, depending on the nature of their relationship and the time from their last encounter. And if e.g. I say "Hi" to someone and they don't greet me back, I might be offended - because I have given them one stroke, but they haven't reciprocated by giving me a stroke in return.
The titular "games" are defined as social transactions with some ulterior motive and a payoff. For example, if A and B are going to a movie together and A gets offended over something that B said, B might reply with "if you are in one of your bad moods, then I will not go with you, and you might as well go alone". This has an ulterior motive, since B does not really want to go home; the purpose of the statement is to get A to placate B. A may now play along, in which case B wins; or A might refuse to play by pretending not to understand the motive behind B's statement, saying something like "in that case I will go alone, then".
So far, so good, and there is quite a bit of insightful analysis of some games. Unfortunately however, there is also lots of 1960s sexism, homophobia, and outright bizarre Freudian theory. Some of the described games resonate intuitively - and reading the description of some, I realize that I've either played them myself, or been the target of others. At the same time, other games sound way too specific, and the motives ascribed to the players more like the product of the author's biases than a realistic description. The attitudes implicit in many of the described games - such as the suggestion that a game played by some women is to intentionally seduce men so that the women can then falsely claim to have been raped - are bothersome enough that I don't feel like I can give this book a positive rating.
On one hand, it some had very insightful models about human behavior. For example, there is the notion of "strokes" - a metaphor for any social interaction in which one person acknowledges the existence of another. As the book defines them:
鈥楽troking鈥� may be used as a general term for intimate physical contact; in practice it may take various forms. [...] By an extension of meaning, 鈥榮troking鈥� may be employed colloquially to denote any act implying recognition of another鈥檚 presence. Hence a stroke may be used as the fundamental unit of social action.
In the book's model, social rituals such as saying hello and asking "how are you" are reciprocal trades of strokes. Both of the people in question give each other some number of strokes, while maintaining an intuitive calculation of exactly how many strokes they owe each other, depending on the nature of their relationship and the time from their last encounter. And if e.g. I say "Hi" to someone and they don't greet me back, I might be offended - because I have given them one stroke, but they haven't reciprocated by giving me a stroke in return.
The titular "games" are defined as social transactions with some ulterior motive and a payoff. For example, if A and B are going to a movie together and A gets offended over something that B said, B might reply with "if you are in one of your bad moods, then I will not go with you, and you might as well go alone". This has an ulterior motive, since B does not really want to go home; the purpose of the statement is to get A to placate B. A may now play along, in which case B wins; or A might refuse to play by pretending not to understand the motive behind B's statement, saying something like "in that case I will go alone, then".
So far, so good, and there is quite a bit of insightful analysis of some games. Unfortunately however, there is also lots of 1960s sexism, homophobia, and outright bizarre Freudian theory. Some of the described games resonate intuitively - and reading the description of some, I realize that I've either played them myself, or been the target of others. At the same time, other games sound way too specific, and the motives ascribed to the players more like the product of the author's biases than a realistic description. The attitudes implicit in many of the described games - such as the suggestion that a game played by some women is to intentionally seduce men so that the women can then falsely claim to have been raped - are bothersome enough that I don't feel like I can give this book a positive rating.
January 23, 2016
丕乇蹖讴 亘乇賳 亘賳蹖丕賳 诏匕丕乇 "鬲丨賱蹖賱 鬲亘丕丿賱蹖" 亘丕 丕蹖賳 讴鬲丕亘 亘賴 氐賵乇鬲 賲禺鬲氐乇 亘賴 賲亘丕丨孬 賴賲蹖賳 賲賵囟賵毓 倬乇丿丕禺鬲賴: " 丨丕賱丕鬲 賳賮爻丕賳蹖" 讴賴 亘賴 爻賴 丿爻鬲賴 蹖 賵丕賱丿貙 亘丕賱睾 賵 讴賵丿讴 鬲賯爻蹖賲 賲蹖 卮賵賳丿 貙"鬲亘丕丿賱" 賵 丕賳賵丕毓 丕賵賳 丕夭 诏賵賳賴 賴丕蹖 賲讴賲賱貙 賲鬲賯丕胤毓 賵 賳賴賮鬲賴 賵 丿乇 賳賴丕蹖鬲 鬲毓乇蹖賮 "亘丕夭蹖 賴丕" 賵 丕賳賵丕毓卮. 亘丕 鬲賵噩賴 亘賴 丕爻賲 讴鬲丕亘 丕賳鬲馗丕乇 賲蹖乇賴 賲亘丨孬 爻賵賲 賲亘爻賵胤 鬲乇 亘丕卮賴 賵 亘蹖卮鬲乇 亘賴卮 倬乇丿丕禺鬲賴 卮丿賴 亘丕卮賴 讴賴 丿乇 賲賯丕蹖爻賴 亘丕 丿賵 賲亘丨孬 丕賵賱貙 賴賲蹖賳 胤賵乇 賴賲 賴爻鬲 賵賱蹖 亘丕夭 賴賲 胤亘賯 鬲氐賵乇丕鬲 賵 丕賳鬲馗丕乇丕鬲賲 賳亘賵丿
亘丕 鬲賵噩賴 亘賴 丌卮賳丕蹖蹖 賲禺鬲氐乇蹖 讴賴 亘丕 賲亘丨孬 丕賵賱 賵 丿賵賲 丿丕卮鬲賲 亘蹖卮鬲乇 亘乇丕蹖 丌卮賳丕蹖蹖 亘丕 賲亘丨孬 丿賵賲 亘賴 禺賵賳丿賳 丕蹖賳 讴鬲丕亘 乇賵 丌賵乇丿賲. 鬲氐賵乇賲 亘乇 丕蹖賳 亘賵丿 讴賴 亘乇賳 亘賴 鬲讴 鬲讴 亘丕夭蹖 賴丕蹖蹖 讴賴 鬲丕 丕賵賳 夭賲丕賳 蹖丕賮鬲 卮丿賴 亘賵丿 亘丕 蹖賴 鬲賵囟蹖丨 鬲卅賵乇蹖 賵丕乇 賵 鬲賵氐蹖賮 賵 鬲賮爻蹖乇卮 亘乇 丕爻丕爻 丨丕賱丕鬲 賳賮爻丕賳蹖 貙 蹖讴蹖 丿賵 鬲丕 賲孬丕賱 賵 丿乇 賳賴丕蹖鬲 丌賳鬲蹖 鬲夭 亘丕夭蹖 賲賵乇丿 亘丨孬 貙 亘丕夭蹖 賴丕 乇賵 賲毓乇賮蹖 讴賳賴 賵賱蹖 诏丕賴丕 蹖賴 亘丕夭蹖 鬲賳賴丕 亘賴 匕讴乇 賮賯胤 賵 賮賯胤 蹖讴 賲孬丕賱 禺鬲賲 賲蹖 卮丿
亘乇賳 丿乇 鬲賲丕蹖夭 "亘丕夭蹖" 丕夭 "毓賲賱 " 诏賮鬲賴: 毓賲賱 蹖讴 鬲亘丕丿賱 爻丕丿賴 蹖丕 乇卮鬲賴 丕蹖 丕夭 鬲亘丕丿賱 賴丕蹖 鬲毓賴丿 卮丿賴 丕爻鬲 讴賴 亘賴 賲賳馗賵乇蹖 禺丕氐 丕賳噩丕賲 賲蹖 诏蹖乇丿. 丕诏乇 卮禺氐蹖 丕夭 卮禺氐 丿蹖诏乇 鬲賯丕囟丕蹖 鬲丕蹖蹖丿 讴賳丿 賵 丿乇禺賵丕爻鬲卮 亘乇丌賵乇丿賴 卮賵丿 蹖讴 毓賲賱 丕賳噩丕賲 诏乇賮鬲賴 丕爻鬲. 丕诏乇 卮禺氐蹖 丕夭 卮禺氐 丿蹖诏乇 鬲賯丕囟丕蹖 鬲丕蹖蹖丿 讴賳丿 賵 丿乇禺賵丕爻鬲卮 亘乇丌賵乇丿賴 卮賵丿 賵 爻倬爻 丌賳 鬲丕蹖蹖丿 亘乇 囟丿 鬲丕蹖蹖丿讴賳賳丿賴 亘賴 讴丕乇 诏乇賮鬲賴 卮賵丿 蹖讴 亘丕夭蹖 丕賳噩丕賲 卮丿賴 丕爻鬲. 亘丕夭蹖 丿乇 馗丕賴乇 亘爻蹖丕乇 卮亘蹖賴 毓賲賱 丕爻鬲 丕賲丕 鬲賳賴丕 亘毓丿 丕夭 亘乇丿 丕爻鬲 讴賴 賲卮禺氐 賲蹖 卮賵丿 丕蹖賳 丕毓賲丕賱 丿乇 賵丕賯毓 乇卮鬲賴 丕蹖 鬲乇賮賳丿 亘賵丿賴 丕賳丿 賳賴 丿乇禺賵丕爻鬲 賴丕蹖 氐丕丿賯丕賳賴
亘丕夭蹖 賴丕 賴賲賴 亘丿 賳蹖爻鬲賳丿 . 亘乇賳 蹖讴 賮氐賱 乇賵 亘賴 亘丕夭蹖 賴丕蹖 禺賵亘 丕禺鬲氐丕氐 丿丕丿賴 賵賱蹖 丿乇 賲噩賲賵毓 亘乇丕蹖 亘丕夭蹖 賴丕 爻賴 丿乇噩賴 賯丕卅賱 卮丿賴. 丿乇噩賴 蹖讴 噩賱賵蹖 毓賲賵賲 賯丕亘賱 丕噩乇丕爻鬲. 丿乇噩賴 丿賵 氐丿賲賴 睾蹖乇 賯丕亘賱 噩亘乇丕賳 賵丕乇丿 賳賲蹖 讴賳賴 賵賱蹖 胤乇賮蹖賳 鬲乇噩蹖丨 賲蹖丿賳 噩賱賵蹖 丕賳馗丕乇 丕噩乇丕 賳卮賴 賵 丿乇噩賴 爻賵賲 毓賱丕噩蹖 賳丿丕乇賴 賵 毓丕賯亘鬲 亘賴 亘蹖賲丕乇爻鬲丕賳 賵 丿丕丿诏丕賴 蹖丕 爻乇丿禺丕賳賴 禺鬲賲 賲蹖卮賴
亘乇賳 亘乇丕蹖 鬲讴 鬲讴 亘丕夭蹖 賴丕 賳丕賲蹖 禺賱丕賯丕賳賴 丕賳鬲禺丕亘 讴乇丿賴 賵 趩賳丿蹖賳 亘丕乇 賯亘賱 丕夭 卮乇賵毓 賵 鬲賵囟蹖丨 賲亘丨孬 亘賴 丕蹖賳 賳丕賲 賴丕 亘乇丕蹖 賲孬丕賱 賴丕卮 丕卮丕乇賴 賲蹖 讴賳賴. 賵賱蹖 毓賲賱丕 亘丕 丕蹖賳 賲孬丕賱 賴丕 貙 禺賵丕賳賳丿賴 蹖 賴賳賵夭 賳丕丌卮賳丕 亘丕 丕賵賳 亘丕夭蹖 乇賵 爻乇丿乇诏賲 賲蹖 讴賳賴. 丕蹖賳 胤賵乇 賴賲 讴賴 丕夭 乇蹖賵蹖賵蹖 亘毓囟蹖 丕夭 賮乇賳诏蹖 賴丕 丿爻鬲诏蹖乇賲 卮丿 倬乇丿丕禺鬲賳 亘賴 賲賵囟賵毓 "賴賲噩賳爻 禺賵丕賴蹖" 丿乇 乇丕亘胤賴 亘丕 亘丕夭蹖 丕賳丨乇丕賮 丿乇 乇賵丕亘胤 噩賳爻蹖 賵 賴賲趩賳蹖賳 賳賯卮 夭賳丕賳 丿乇 亘毓囟蹖 丕夭 賲孬丕賱 賴丕卮 丕夭 亘爻蹖丕乇蹖 丕夭 亘丕夭蹖 賴丕 禺蹖賱蹖 亘賴 賲匕丕賯卮賵賳 禺賵卮 賳蹖賵賲丿賴. 丕賱亘鬲賴 讴鬲丕亘 噩丿蹖丿 賳蹖爻鬲 賵 賲孬丕賱 賴丕 賵 賲賵囟賵毓丕鬲卮 亘賴 爻丕賱 1960 亘乇賲蹖 诏乇丿賴
賳鬲蹖噩賴 丕蹖賳 讴賴 亘丕 賵噩賵丿 趩賳丿丕賳 賲賮蹖丿 賳亘賵丿賳 讴鬲丕亘貙 賲亘丨孬 賴賲趩賳丕賳 亘乇丕賲 噩匕丕亘賴. 丕蹖賳 讴賴 亘丿賵賳蹖賲 讴賱 毓賲乇賲賵賳 蹖丕 丿丕乇蹖賲 亘賯蹖賴 乇賵 亘丕夭蹖 賲蹖 丿蹖賲 蹖丕 禺賵丿賲賵賳 胤乇賮 亘丕夭蹖 賴爻鬲蹖賲 噩丕賱亘賴. 丕夭 丕賵賳 噩賴鬲 讴賴 卮丕蹖丿 丨賵丕爻賲賵賳 乇賵 噩賲毓 讴賳蹖賲 鬲讴乇丕乇卮 乇賵 讴賲鬲乇 讴賳蹖賲 賵 賲丕賳毓 丕夭 丕蹖噩丕丿卮賵賳 亘卮蹖賲. 丕诏賴 亘丕 丕蹖賳 讴鬲丕亘 亘賴 禺賵丕爻鬲賴 賲 賳乇爻蹖丿賲 禺亘! 讴鬲丕亘 賴丕蹖 丿蹖诏賴 丕蹖 賴爻鬲賳
亘丕 鬲賵噩賴 亘賴 丌卮賳丕蹖蹖 賲禺鬲氐乇蹖 讴賴 亘丕 賲亘丨孬 丕賵賱 賵 丿賵賲 丿丕卮鬲賲 亘蹖卮鬲乇 亘乇丕蹖 丌卮賳丕蹖蹖 亘丕 賲亘丨孬 丿賵賲 亘賴 禺賵賳丿賳 丕蹖賳 讴鬲丕亘 乇賵 丌賵乇丿賲. 鬲氐賵乇賲 亘乇 丕蹖賳 亘賵丿 讴賴 亘乇賳 亘賴 鬲讴 鬲讴 亘丕夭蹖 賴丕蹖蹖 讴賴 鬲丕 丕賵賳 夭賲丕賳 蹖丕賮鬲 卮丿賴 亘賵丿 亘丕 蹖賴 鬲賵囟蹖丨 鬲卅賵乇蹖 賵丕乇 賵 鬲賵氐蹖賮 賵 鬲賮爻蹖乇卮 亘乇 丕爻丕爻 丨丕賱丕鬲 賳賮爻丕賳蹖 貙 蹖讴蹖 丿賵 鬲丕 賲孬丕賱 賵 丿乇 賳賴丕蹖鬲 丌賳鬲蹖 鬲夭 亘丕夭蹖 賲賵乇丿 亘丨孬 貙 亘丕夭蹖 賴丕 乇賵 賲毓乇賮蹖 讴賳賴 賵賱蹖 诏丕賴丕 蹖賴 亘丕夭蹖 鬲賳賴丕 亘賴 匕讴乇 賮賯胤 賵 賮賯胤 蹖讴 賲孬丕賱 禺鬲賲 賲蹖 卮丿
亘乇賳 丿乇 鬲賲丕蹖夭 "亘丕夭蹖" 丕夭 "毓賲賱 " 诏賮鬲賴: 毓賲賱 蹖讴 鬲亘丕丿賱 爻丕丿賴 蹖丕 乇卮鬲賴 丕蹖 丕夭 鬲亘丕丿賱 賴丕蹖 鬲毓賴丿 卮丿賴 丕爻鬲 讴賴 亘賴 賲賳馗賵乇蹖 禺丕氐 丕賳噩丕賲 賲蹖 诏蹖乇丿. 丕诏乇 卮禺氐蹖 丕夭 卮禺氐 丿蹖诏乇 鬲賯丕囟丕蹖 鬲丕蹖蹖丿 讴賳丿 賵 丿乇禺賵丕爻鬲卮 亘乇丌賵乇丿賴 卮賵丿 蹖讴 毓賲賱 丕賳噩丕賲 诏乇賮鬲賴 丕爻鬲. 丕诏乇 卮禺氐蹖 丕夭 卮禺氐 丿蹖诏乇 鬲賯丕囟丕蹖 鬲丕蹖蹖丿 讴賳丿 賵 丿乇禺賵丕爻鬲卮 亘乇丌賵乇丿賴 卮賵丿 賵 爻倬爻 丌賳 鬲丕蹖蹖丿 亘乇 囟丿 鬲丕蹖蹖丿讴賳賳丿賴 亘賴 讴丕乇 诏乇賮鬲賴 卮賵丿 蹖讴 亘丕夭蹖 丕賳噩丕賲 卮丿賴 丕爻鬲. 亘丕夭蹖 丿乇 馗丕賴乇 亘爻蹖丕乇 卮亘蹖賴 毓賲賱 丕爻鬲 丕賲丕 鬲賳賴丕 亘毓丿 丕夭 亘乇丿 丕爻鬲 讴賴 賲卮禺氐 賲蹖 卮賵丿 丕蹖賳 丕毓賲丕賱 丿乇 賵丕賯毓 乇卮鬲賴 丕蹖 鬲乇賮賳丿 亘賵丿賴 丕賳丿 賳賴 丿乇禺賵丕爻鬲 賴丕蹖 氐丕丿賯丕賳賴
亘丕夭蹖 賴丕 賴賲賴 亘丿 賳蹖爻鬲賳丿 . 亘乇賳 蹖讴 賮氐賱 乇賵 亘賴 亘丕夭蹖 賴丕蹖 禺賵亘 丕禺鬲氐丕氐 丿丕丿賴 賵賱蹖 丿乇 賲噩賲賵毓 亘乇丕蹖 亘丕夭蹖 賴丕 爻賴 丿乇噩賴 賯丕卅賱 卮丿賴. 丿乇噩賴 蹖讴 噩賱賵蹖 毓賲賵賲 賯丕亘賱 丕噩乇丕爻鬲. 丿乇噩賴 丿賵 氐丿賲賴 睾蹖乇 賯丕亘賱 噩亘乇丕賳 賵丕乇丿 賳賲蹖 讴賳賴 賵賱蹖 胤乇賮蹖賳 鬲乇噩蹖丨 賲蹖丿賳 噩賱賵蹖 丕賳馗丕乇 丕噩乇丕 賳卮賴 賵 丿乇噩賴 爻賵賲 毓賱丕噩蹖 賳丿丕乇賴 賵 毓丕賯亘鬲 亘賴 亘蹖賲丕乇爻鬲丕賳 賵 丿丕丿诏丕賴 蹖丕 爻乇丿禺丕賳賴 禺鬲賲 賲蹖卮賴
亘乇賳 亘乇丕蹖 鬲讴 鬲讴 亘丕夭蹖 賴丕 賳丕賲蹖 禺賱丕賯丕賳賴 丕賳鬲禺丕亘 讴乇丿賴 賵 趩賳丿蹖賳 亘丕乇 賯亘賱 丕夭 卮乇賵毓 賵 鬲賵囟蹖丨 賲亘丨孬 亘賴 丕蹖賳 賳丕賲 賴丕 亘乇丕蹖 賲孬丕賱 賴丕卮 丕卮丕乇賴 賲蹖 讴賳賴. 賵賱蹖 毓賲賱丕 亘丕 丕蹖賳 賲孬丕賱 賴丕 貙 禺賵丕賳賳丿賴 蹖 賴賳賵夭 賳丕丌卮賳丕 亘丕 丕賵賳 亘丕夭蹖 乇賵 爻乇丿乇诏賲 賲蹖 讴賳賴. 丕蹖賳 胤賵乇 賴賲 讴賴 丕夭 乇蹖賵蹖賵蹖 亘毓囟蹖 丕夭 賮乇賳诏蹖 賴丕 丿爻鬲诏蹖乇賲 卮丿 倬乇丿丕禺鬲賳 亘賴 賲賵囟賵毓 "賴賲噩賳爻 禺賵丕賴蹖" 丿乇 乇丕亘胤賴 亘丕 亘丕夭蹖 丕賳丨乇丕賮 丿乇 乇賵丕亘胤 噩賳爻蹖 賵 賴賲趩賳蹖賳 賳賯卮 夭賳丕賳 丿乇 亘毓囟蹖 丕夭 賲孬丕賱 賴丕卮 丕夭 亘爻蹖丕乇蹖 丕夭 亘丕夭蹖 賴丕 禺蹖賱蹖 亘賴 賲匕丕賯卮賵賳 禺賵卮 賳蹖賵賲丿賴. 丕賱亘鬲賴 讴鬲丕亘 噩丿蹖丿 賳蹖爻鬲 賵 賲孬丕賱 賴丕 賵 賲賵囟賵毓丕鬲卮 亘賴 爻丕賱 1960 亘乇賲蹖 诏乇丿賴
賳鬲蹖噩賴 丕蹖賳 讴賴 亘丕 賵噩賵丿 趩賳丿丕賳 賲賮蹖丿 賳亘賵丿賳 讴鬲丕亘貙 賲亘丨孬 賴賲趩賳丕賳 亘乇丕賲 噩匕丕亘賴. 丕蹖賳 讴賴 亘丿賵賳蹖賲 讴賱 毓賲乇賲賵賳 蹖丕 丿丕乇蹖賲 亘賯蹖賴 乇賵 亘丕夭蹖 賲蹖 丿蹖賲 蹖丕 禺賵丿賲賵賳 胤乇賮 亘丕夭蹖 賴爻鬲蹖賲 噩丕賱亘賴. 丕夭 丕賵賳 噩賴鬲 讴賴 卮丕蹖丿 丨賵丕爻賲賵賳 乇賵 噩賲毓 讴賳蹖賲 鬲讴乇丕乇卮 乇賵 讴賲鬲乇 讴賳蹖賲 賵 賲丕賳毓 丕夭 丕蹖噩丕丿卮賵賳 亘卮蹖賲. 丕诏賴 亘丕 丕蹖賳 讴鬲丕亘 亘賴 禺賵丕爻鬲賴 賲 賳乇爻蹖丿賲 禺亘! 讴鬲丕亘 賴丕蹖 丿蹖诏賴 丕蹖 賴爻鬲賳
March 18, 2010
This book is a fascinating psychological journey into the minds of everyday people (including, and probably ESPECIALLY, your own). Berne's list of psychological "games" we all play with each other is fascinating, as is what you learn about yourself by analyzing which games you tend to revisit regularly.
One little warning: When you learn to recognize these games, you will be forced to eliminate at least 95% of the B.S. in your life and frequently find yourself disgusted by 100% of the B.S. in everyone else's. That being said, if you're on a quest for honest communication, this book is indispensable.
One little warning: When you learn to recognize these games, you will be forced to eliminate at least 95% of the B.S. in your life and frequently find yourself disgusted by 100% of the B.S. in everyone else's. That being said, if you're on a quest for honest communication, this book is indispensable.
March 8, 2021
" 賴丿賮 丕乇蹖讴 亘乇賳 丕夭 賳賵卮鬲賳 丕蹖賳 讴鬲丕亘 丿丕丿賳 丕胤賱丕毓丕鬲 亘蹖卮鬲乇 丿乇 鬲毓乇蹖賮 賵 鬲丨賱蹖賱 亘丕夭蹖 賴丕 ( 乇賵丕賳卮賳丕爻蹖 乇賵丕亘胤 丕賳爻丕賳蹖 ) 丕爻鬲 讴賴 亘賴 胤賵乇 禺賱丕氐賴 丿乇 賲亘丨孬 鬲丨賱蹖賱 乇賮鬲丕乇 賴丕蹖 賲鬲賯丕亘賱 賲胤乇丨 卮丿賴 丕爻鬲 賵 禺賵丕賳賳丿賴 亘丕 賲胤丕賱毓賴 丌賳 賲蹖鈥屫①呝堌藏� 讴賴 趩诏賵賳賴 禺賵丕爻鬲賴 賴丕 賵 賳蹖丕夭賴丕蹖 禺賵丿 乇丕 亘賴 胤賵乇 賲爻鬲賯蹖賲 亘蹖丕賳 讴賳丿 貙 亘蹖 丌賳讴賴 丕夭 胤乇丿 卮丿诏蹖 貙 鬲賲爻禺乇 丿蹖诏乇丕賳 賵 賳丕丿蹖丿賴 诏乇賮鬲賴 卮丿賳 亘鬲乇爻丿 .... "
August 27, 2018
Unconvincing pseudoscientific psychobabble.
April 22, 2018
My absolute darling of a father has been badgering me to read this book since I was a kid.(strange request to make to a seven year old, but oh well, strange family). But now I see what all the fuss was about.This book is quite the "A-ha, I see your such and such play, and I raise you this seemingly innocuous play". Dare I say it's a bit of enlightened fun when you can even scratch the surface of deciphering something so complex as Human Relationships.
On a psychological-interactive playfield Berne's book is invaluable, it really equips us to call people out on their pattern of behaviour or at least learn how to handle a variety of people if one so wishes to play along.
I guess the introspective takeaway from Berne's book is that when people don't want to be emotionally vulnerable or truly intimate they fall into playing roles, this mask is convenient, lazy and predictable.It's also easier to get caught in a pattern of deceiving yourself, and in a way believing you are what role you play.Which is tragic because one is so scared of unmasking that they would never realise whether their actions and feelings are "real" or just part of the "act" they have taken up as a default.
On a psychological-interactive playfield Berne's book is invaluable, it really equips us to call people out on their pattern of behaviour or at least learn how to handle a variety of people if one so wishes to play along.
I guess the introspective takeaway from Berne's book is that when people don't want to be emotionally vulnerable or truly intimate they fall into playing roles, this mask is convenient, lazy and predictable.It's also easier to get caught in a pattern of deceiving yourself, and in a way believing you are what role you play.Which is tragic because one is so scared of unmasking that they would never realise whether their actions and feelings are "real" or just part of the "act" they have taken up as a default.
March 22, 2023
鈥淎wareness requires living in the here and now, and not in the elsewhere, the past or the future.鈥�
鈥� Eric Berne, Games People Play
Here's the thing about this book.
I come from a family of Psychologists, social workers, ETC. I have read many books on this subject from human relationships, to dysfunctional people to transactional Analysis and human behavior, maladaptive behavior , personality disorders. I love some of these books, hate others, are in between on most.
This remains one of the few I could not complete.
Not because it is not good. It is. Not because it isn't educational. Believe me it is.
But it is also incredibly complicated. Many real life examples are used which normally I love but for such a short book, there was so much information crammed in, I simply could not understand much of it. Vert complicated writing and not in a format I could really follow.
I felt so bad not liking this! It is one of my dad's favorites but then again he is a Doctor (psychologist....although I guess many a Republican would say that doesn't count) but he actually understood my dilemma. The writing was simply to much for me.
I do recommend it . I have not had this issue in my other reads of this genre. This is the only one and I'd been looking forward to reading it. The only reason I gave up was, not because the writing is not good but because it so crammed with facts to the point my brain started to ache. I do feel bad about not finishing t his one as it does offer alot in terms of the negotiating the ins and outs of toxic or unhealthy relationships. Maybe a better fit for others who have an easier time with this type of writing.
鈥� Eric Berne, Games People Play
Here's the thing about this book.
I come from a family of Psychologists, social workers, ETC. I have read many books on this subject from human relationships, to dysfunctional people to transactional Analysis and human behavior, maladaptive behavior , personality disorders. I love some of these books, hate others, are in between on most.
This remains one of the few I could not complete.
Not because it is not good. It is. Not because it isn't educational. Believe me it is.
But it is also incredibly complicated. Many real life examples are used which normally I love but for such a short book, there was so much information crammed in, I simply could not understand much of it. Vert complicated writing and not in a format I could really follow.
I felt so bad not liking this! It is one of my dad's favorites but then again he is a Doctor (psychologist....although I guess many a Republican would say that doesn't count) but he actually understood my dilemma. The writing was simply to much for me.
I do recommend it . I have not had this issue in my other reads of this genre. This is the only one and I'd been looking forward to reading it. The only reason I gave up was, not because the writing is not good but because it so crammed with facts to the point my brain started to ache. I do feel bad about not finishing t his one as it does offer alot in terms of the negotiating the ins and outs of toxic or unhealthy relationships. Maybe a better fit for others who have an easier time with this type of writing.
October 16, 2010
Basically, you're manipulating everyone and everyone you know is manipulating you!
Admittedly, this book is flawed. Because the author is primarily concerned with interpersonal games, he tends to put every possible scenario within that context. Some of his ideas are now dated, bordering on offensive. Nevertheless, I found the book to be all kinds of enlightening and tremendously useful. I recommend it under the assumption that wise readers will be able to sort the good from the bad.
Admittedly, this book is flawed. Because the author is primarily concerned with interpersonal games, he tends to put every possible scenario within that context. Some of his ideas are now dated, bordering on offensive. Nevertheless, I found the book to be all kinds of enlightening and tremendously useful. I recommend it under the assumption that wise readers will be able to sort the good from the bad.
August 22, 2007
smart. Falls into the category of books that give you the secret reason for why things happen the way they do.
May 12, 2022
I finished it, but at what cost
July 1, 2018
From the start it felt like the model of human relationships Berne describes in this book had so much potential. I think to some extent people already intuitively know that we play social games with each other, quite often without noticing. This book rigorously formalises these games and explores how they're often used to fulfil some need or lack of intimacy. The school of psychotherapy spawned by Berne, transaction analysis, appears to have many practical mental tools and models of thinking for people and therapists alike.
This book however was a bore. There isn't any other way of getting around it. The theory was briefly outlined at the start and bits at the end, almost like reading some lecture notes. In-between some common 'games people play' were listed and categorised by their context. At the start these games were interesting but they eventually became monotonous and difficult to stay with. It's such a shame and it's frustrating to me as a reader because the topic feels like it has so much potential.
There's also the other issue of the book being written for the social and societal context of 1960s USA. This makes all of the gender-specific games hopelessly inapplicable to modern gender roles and many of them definitely step into the boundaries of being needlessly sexist. Alongside this there are also some...interesting (read stupid) ideas about the motivations behind homosexual men.
Lastly, it dawned on me around halfway through the book to ask "how much of this has been empirically verified?" It's fine to state these formal mental models that appear to fit in well with our lives, but who's to say that it doesn't just give an illusion of a good fit? The book, being an introduction to the field of transaction analysis, was likely published before any such studies could take place. But until I get some idea of how much of the book's theory has been at least loosely replicated by psychologists (if this can be done at all) I shall have to regard its theory and models with a healthy dose of scepticism.
This book however was a bore. There isn't any other way of getting around it. The theory was briefly outlined at the start and bits at the end, almost like reading some lecture notes. In-between some common 'games people play' were listed and categorised by their context. At the start these games were interesting but they eventually became monotonous and difficult to stay with. It's such a shame and it's frustrating to me as a reader because the topic feels like it has so much potential.
There's also the other issue of the book being written for the social and societal context of 1960s USA. This makes all of the gender-specific games hopelessly inapplicable to modern gender roles and many of them definitely step into the boundaries of being needlessly sexist. Alongside this there are also some...interesting (read stupid) ideas about the motivations behind homosexual men.
Lastly, it dawned on me around halfway through the book to ask "how much of this has been empirically verified?" It's fine to state these formal mental models that appear to fit in well with our lives, but who's to say that it doesn't just give an illusion of a good fit? The book, being an introduction to the field of transaction analysis, was likely published before any such studies could take place. But until I get some idea of how much of the book's theory has been at least loosely replicated by psychologists (if this can be done at all) I shall have to regard its theory and models with a healthy dose of scepticism.
April 26, 2016
亘禺賵賳蹖丿 鬲丕 亘賮賴賲蹖丿:
丕賵賱 亘丕 亘賯蹖賴 趩賴 乇賮鬲丕乇蹖 乇丕 丿乇 倬蹖卮 诏乇賮鬲賴 丕蹖丿
賵
丿賵賲貙 亘賯蹖賴 亘丕 卮賲丕 趩賴 乇賮鬲丕乇蹖 賲蹖 讴賳賳丿
丕賵賱 亘丕 亘賯蹖賴 趩賴 乇賮鬲丕乇蹖 乇丕 丿乇 倬蹖卮 诏乇賮鬲賴 丕蹖丿
賵
丿賵賲貙 亘賯蹖賴 亘丕 卮賲丕 趩賴 乇賮鬲丕乇蹖 賲蹖 讴賳賳丿
March 3, 2020
DNF at 70%
This book is not only heavily reliant on Freudian and Jungian paradigms (and thus hermeneutics rather than evidence-based psychology) but also displays a stunning amount of sexist bias. Not for me, though the premise is fascinating.
This book is not only heavily reliant on Freudian and Jungian paradigms (and thus hermeneutics rather than evidence-based psychology) but also displays a stunning amount of sexist bias. Not for me, though the premise is fascinating.
May 5, 2023
醿斸儭 醿儤醿掅儨醿� 醿♂儛醿メ儛醿犪儣醿曖償醿氠儩醿ㄡ儤 醿п儠醿斸儦醿愥儢醿� 醿涐儛醿掅儛醿犪儧醿� 醿め儭醿樶儱醿濁儦醿濁儝醿涐儛 醿撫儛 醿搬儤醿炨儨醿濁儢醿樶儭 醿濁儭醿⑨儛醿⑨儧醿� 醿氠償醿曖儛醿� 醿ㄡ儛醿⑨儜醿斸儬醿愥儴醿曖儤醿氠儧醿� 醿涐儤醿犪儵醿樶儛.
醿樶儤 醿搬儯醿ａ儯, 醿撫儛 醿椺儛醿� 醿愥儭醿� 醿涐儤醿椺儺醿犪儛 "醿椺儛醿曖儤醿撫儛醿� 醿♂儛醿欋儯醿椺儛醿犪儤 醿涐儴醿濁儜醿氠償醿戓儤 醿ㄡ償醿掅儢醿樶儢醿︶儞醿斸儜醿� 醿涐儛醿犪儛 醿涐償醿犪償 醿掅儛醿撫儛醿掅儤醿曖儦醿樶儭醿�"
醿涐儴醿濁儜醿氠償醿戓儤醿� 醿栣儤醿栣儲醿� 醿撫儛 醿斸儭醿� 醿樶儭醿� 醿掅儛醿涐儩醿曖儦醿樶儦醿� 醿涐儛醿メ儠醿� 醿ａ儥醿曖償, 醿涐儛醿掅儬醿愥儧 醿儛醿愥儨 醿♂儛醿欋儛醿樶儰醿� 醿儤醿掅儨醿� 醿愥儲醿涐儩醿┽儨醿撫儛. 醿め儭醿樶儱醿濁儣醿斸儬醿愥優醿斸儠醿⑨償醿戓儤醿♂儣醿曖儤醿♂儛醿� 醿撫儛醿償醿犪儤醿氠儤, 醿涐儛醿掅儬醿愥儧 醿犪儩醿涐儛醿溼儤醿曖儤醿� 醿樶儥醿樶儣醿償醿戓儛.
醿愥儞醿愥儧醿樶儛醿溼償醿戓儤 醿欋儤 醿曖儤醿儩醿撫儤 醿犪儩醿� 醿椺儛醿涐儛醿ㄡ儩醿戓儞醿溼償醿�, 醿涐儛醿掅儬醿愥儧 醿戓償醿犪儨醿涐儛 醿儛醿愥儨 醿欋儛醿犪儝醿愥儞 醿掅儛醿ㄡ儛醿氠儛 醿椺儛醿涐儛醿ㄡ償醿戓儤 醿撫儛 醿犪儩醿氠償醿戓儤.
醿涐儝醿濁儨醿� 醿儛醿氠儤醿愥儨 醿儩醿⑨儛 醿椺儛醿涐儛醿ㄡ儭 醿曖儣醿愥儧醿愥儴醿濁儜, 醿愥儤 醿斸儺醿氠儛醿� 醿愥儧 醿犪償醿曖儤醿ａ儴醿� 醿涐償 醿曖儣醿愥儧醿愥儴醿濁儜 醿椺儛醿涐儛醿ㄡ儭 "醿溼儛醿償醿� 醿犪儛 醿涐儛醿掅儛醿犪儤 醿曖儛醿�"
醿愥儨醿� 醿戓儛醿曖儴醿曖儤醿� 醿犪儩醿氠儴醿� 醿曖儛醿� 醿撫儛 醿涐儴醿濁儜醿氠償醿戓儤醿♂儝醿愥儨 醿ㄡ償醿め儛醿♂償醿戓儛醿� 醿曖償醿氠儩醿撫償醿戓儤. 醿愥儨 醿ㄡ償醿樶儷醿氠償醿戓儛 醿曖儣醿愥儧醿愥儴醿濁儜醿撫償 "醿涐儩醿欋儬醿儛醿氠償醿戓儯醿氠儤 醿戓儬醿償醿溼儤", 醿п儠醿斸儦醿愥儰醿犪儤醿� 醿涐儩醿♂儧醿斸儨醿樶儭醿椺儠醿樶儭 醿涐儢醿愥儞 醿曖儛醿� 醿撫儛 醿炨儬醿斸儮醿斸儨醿栣儤醿斸儜醿� 醿愥儬 醿涐儛醿メ儠醿�. 醿愥儨 醿犪儛醿曖儤 醿欋儤醿撫償醿� 醿戓償醿曖儬醿� 醿椺儛醿涐儛醿ㄡ儤. 醿涐儛醿掅儬醿愥儧 醿涐儛醿樶儨醿� 醿儩醿⑨儛 醿椺儛醿涐儛醿ㄡ儤醿� 醿椺儛醿涐儛醿ㄡ儤 醿涐儤醿償醿曖儭, 醿愥儬 醿涐儤醿償醿曖儭 醿犪儩醿氠償醿戓儤醿� 醿儠醿氠儛.
醿涐儩醿め償醿犪償醿戓儤醿� 醿♂儛醿樶儨醿⑨償醿犪償醿♂儩 醿撫償醿め儤醿溼儤醿儤醿� 醿メ儩醿溼儞醿� 醿戓償醿犪儨醿�. 醿斸儸醿斸儬醿� 醿犪儩醿� 醿涐儩醿め償醿犪償醿戓儛 醿愥儬醿樶儭 醿愥儬醿♂償醿戓儩醿戓儤醿� 醿撫儛醿撫儛醿♂儮醿ａ儬醿斸儜醿�. 醿儛醿愥儨 醿♂儛醿樶儨醿⑨償醿犪償醿♂儩 醿撫償醿め儤醿溼儤醿儤醿愥儛. 醿涐償醿犪償 醿戓償醿犪儨醿� 醿掅儛醿撫儛醿曖儤醿撫儛 醿犪儩醿� 醿愥儞醿愥儧醿樶儛醿溼儭 醿犪儩醿� 醿斸儦醿愥優醿愥儬醿愥儥醿斸儜醿� 醿ａ儞醿愥儭醿⑨儯醿犪償醿� 醿犪儩醿� 醿愥儬醿♂償醿戓儩醿戓儭 醿撫儛 醿斸儝 醿ａ儥醿曖償 醿涐儩醿め償醿犪償醿戓儛醿愥儩.
醿椺儠醿樶儣醿濁儨 醿戓償醿犪儨醿� 醿め儤醿メ儬醿濁儜醿撫儛 醿犪儩醿� 50 醿償醿氠儴醿� 醿椺儛醿涐儛醿ㄡ償醿戓儤 醿愥儲醿愥儬 醿樶儛醿犪儭醿斸儜醿斸儜醿撫儛, 醿撫儛 醿犪儛醿� 醿愥儬 醿樶儛醿犪儭醿斸儜醿斸儜醿撫儛 醿樶儧醿斸儨醿� 醿♂儛醿償醿� 醿樶儺醿斸儠醿� 醿♂儛醿♂儮醿愥儠醿�. :醿撫儞 醿ａ儰醿犪儩 醿涐償醿⑨儤 醿犪儩醿氠償醿戓儤 醿撫儛 醿ａ儰醿犪儩 醿涐償醿⑨儤 醿椺儛醿涐儛醿ㄡ儤醿�. 醿撫儛 醿椺儛醿� 醿♂儩醿儤醿愥儦醿ａ儬 醿メ儭醿斸儦醿斸儜醿ㄡ儤 醿♂儛醿撫儛醿� 醿ａ儰醿犪儩 醿犪儣醿ａ儦醿樶儛 醿掅儛醿愥儬醿┽儤醿� 醿曖儤醿� 醿犪儛 醿椺儛醿涐儛醿ㄡ儭 醿椺儛醿涐儛醿ㄡ儩醿戓儭.
醿斸儬醿� 醿涐儩醿涐償醿溼儮醿ㄡ儤 醿戓償醿犪儨醿涐儛 醿メ儠醿斸儶醿溼儩醿戓儤醿斸儬醿� 醿ａ儰醿犪儩 醿氠儩醿掅儤醿欋儯醿犪儤 醿犪儛醿� 醿ａ儸醿濁儞醿� 醿曖儤醿撫儬醿� 醿儨醿濁儜醿樶償醿犪儭 醿撫儛 醿斸儭 醿儛醿愥儨 醿涐儩醿涐償醿儩醿溼儛.
醿犪儛醿涐儩醿撫償醿溼儤醿涐償 醿愥儞醿掅儤醿氠儛醿� 醿儛醿氠儤醿愥儨 醿♂償醿メ儭醿樶儭醿⑨儯醿犪儤 醿撫儛 醿搬儩醿涐儩醿め儩醿戓儤醿ａ儬醿� 醿ㄡ償醿樶儷醿氠償醿戓儛 醿涐儩醿斸儵醿曖償醿溼儩醿� 醿戓償醿曖儬醿�, 醿涐儛醿掅儬醿愥儧 醿儛醿氠儤醿愥儨 醿涐儩醿欋儬醿儛醿氠償醿戓儯醿氠儛醿� 醿氠儛醿炨儛醿犪儛醿欋儩醿戓儭 醿戓償醿犪儨醿� 醿撫儛 醿ㄡ償醿ａ儬醿愥儸醿п儩醿め儛醿� 醿曖償醿� 醿涐儤醿樶儲醿斸儜醿�. :醿撫儞
醿犪儛醿曖儤 醿儛醿愥儨 醿欋儛醿犪儝醿� 醿儤醿掅儨醿樶儛, 醿め儭醿樶儱醿濁儣醿斸儬醿愥優醿斸儠醿⑨償醿戓儭 醿儛醿愥儨 醿掅儛醿ａ儭醿儩醿犪儞醿斸儜醿愥儣 醿撫儛 醿愥儬醿愥儰醿♂儤醿メ儩醿椺償醿犪儛醿炨償醿曖儮醿斸儜醿♂儛醿� 醿撫儛醿斸儺醿涐儛醿犪償醿戓儛醿� 醿椺儛醿曖儤醿� 醿掅儛醿涐儩醿犪儥醿曖償醿曖儛醿ㄡ儤, 醿ㄡ償醿樶儷醿氠償醿戓儛 醿涐儛醿犪儣醿氠儛醿� 醿涐儴醿濁儜醿氠償醿戓儤醿� 醿ㄡ償醿掅儢醿樶儢醿︶儞醿斸儣, 醿涐儛醿掅儬醿愥儧 醿椺儠醿樶儣醿� 醿戓償醿犪儨醿涐儛 醿犪儩醿掅儩醿犪儶 醿椺儱醿曖儛 醿椺儛醿涐儛醿ㄡ償醿戓儤醿撫儛醿� 醿椺儛醿曖儤醿� 醿撫儛醿︶儸醿斸儠醿樶儭 醿掅儢醿� 醿儠醿斸儦 醿涐儴醿濁儜醿氠償醿戓儤醿� 醿⑨儬醿愥儞醿樶儶醿樶償醿戓儢醿� 醿愥儧醿愥儲醿氠償醿戓儛 醿撫儛 醿涐儴醿濁儜醿氠償醿戓儤醿♂儝醿愥儨 醿掅儛醿溼儣醿愥儠醿樶儭醿ａ儰醿氠償醿戓儛醿�.
醿樶儤 醿搬儯醿ａ儯, 醿撫儛 醿椺儛醿� 醿愥儭醿� 醿涐儤醿椺儺醿犪儛 "醿椺儛醿曖儤醿撫儛醿� 醿♂儛醿欋儯醿椺儛醿犪儤 醿涐儴醿濁儜醿氠償醿戓儤 醿ㄡ償醿掅儢醿樶儢醿︶儞醿斸儜醿� 醿涐儛醿犪儛 醿涐償醿犪償 醿掅儛醿撫儛醿掅儤醿曖儦醿樶儭醿�"
醿涐儴醿濁儜醿氠償醿戓儤醿� 醿栣儤醿栣儲醿� 醿撫儛 醿斸儭醿� 醿樶儭醿� 醿掅儛醿涐儩醿曖儦醿樶儦醿� 醿涐儛醿メ儠醿� 醿ａ儥醿曖償, 醿涐儛醿掅儬醿愥儧 醿儛醿愥儨 醿♂儛醿欋儛醿樶儰醿� 醿儤醿掅儨醿� 醿愥儲醿涐儩醿┽儨醿撫儛. 醿め儭醿樶儱醿濁儣醿斸儬醿愥優醿斸儠醿⑨償醿戓儤醿♂儣醿曖儤醿♂儛醿� 醿撫儛醿償醿犪儤醿氠儤, 醿涐儛醿掅儬醿愥儧 醿犪儩醿涐儛醿溼儤醿曖儤醿� 醿樶儥醿樶儣醿償醿戓儛.
醿愥儞醿愥儧醿樶儛醿溼償醿戓儤 醿欋儤 醿曖儤醿儩醿撫儤 醿犪儩醿� 醿椺儛醿涐儛醿ㄡ儩醿戓儞醿溼償醿�, 醿涐儛醿掅儬醿愥儧 醿戓償醿犪儨醿涐儛 醿儛醿愥儨 醿欋儛醿犪儝醿愥儞 醿掅儛醿ㄡ儛醿氠儛 醿椺儛醿涐儛醿ㄡ償醿戓儤 醿撫儛 醿犪儩醿氠償醿戓儤.
醿涐儝醿濁儨醿� 醿儛醿氠儤醿愥儨 醿儩醿⑨儛 醿椺儛醿涐儛醿ㄡ儭 醿曖儣醿愥儧醿愥儴醿濁儜, 醿愥儤 醿斸儺醿氠儛醿� 醿愥儧 醿犪償醿曖儤醿ａ儴醿� 醿涐償 醿曖儣醿愥儧醿愥儴醿濁儜 醿椺儛醿涐儛醿ㄡ儭 "醿溼儛醿償醿� 醿犪儛 醿涐儛醿掅儛醿犪儤 醿曖儛醿�"
醿愥儨醿� 醿戓儛醿曖儴醿曖儤醿� 醿犪儩醿氠儴醿� 醿曖儛醿� 醿撫儛 醿涐儴醿濁儜醿氠償醿戓儤醿♂儝醿愥儨 醿ㄡ償醿め儛醿♂償醿戓儛醿� 醿曖償醿氠儩醿撫償醿戓儤. 醿愥儨 醿ㄡ償醿樶儷醿氠償醿戓儛 醿曖儣醿愥儧醿愥儴醿濁儜醿撫償 "醿涐儩醿欋儬醿儛醿氠償醿戓儯醿氠儤 醿戓儬醿償醿溼儤", 醿п儠醿斸儦醿愥儰醿犪儤醿� 醿涐儩醿♂儧醿斸儨醿樶儭醿椺儠醿樶儭 醿涐儢醿愥儞 醿曖儛醿� 醿撫儛 醿炨儬醿斸儮醿斸儨醿栣儤醿斸儜醿� 醿愥儬 醿涐儛醿メ儠醿�. 醿愥儨 醿犪儛醿曖儤 醿欋儤醿撫償醿� 醿戓償醿曖儬醿� 醿椺儛醿涐儛醿ㄡ儤. 醿涐儛醿掅儬醿愥儧 醿涐儛醿樶儨醿� 醿儩醿⑨儛 醿椺儛醿涐儛醿ㄡ儤醿� 醿椺儛醿涐儛醿ㄡ儤 醿涐儤醿償醿曖儭, 醿愥儬 醿涐儤醿償醿曖儭 醿犪儩醿氠償醿戓儤醿� 醿儠醿氠儛.
醿涐儩醿め償醿犪償醿戓儤醿� 醿♂儛醿樶儨醿⑨償醿犪償醿♂儩 醿撫償醿め儤醿溼儤醿儤醿� 醿メ儩醿溼儞醿� 醿戓償醿犪儨醿�. 醿斸儸醿斸儬醿� 醿犪儩醿� 醿涐儩醿め償醿犪償醿戓儛 醿愥儬醿樶儭 醿愥儬醿♂償醿戓儩醿戓儤醿� 醿撫儛醿撫儛醿♂儮醿ａ儬醿斸儜醿�. 醿儛醿愥儨 醿♂儛醿樶儨醿⑨償醿犪償醿♂儩 醿撫償醿め儤醿溼儤醿儤醿愥儛. 醿涐償醿犪償 醿戓償醿犪儨醿� 醿掅儛醿撫儛醿曖儤醿撫儛 醿犪儩醿� 醿愥儞醿愥儧醿樶儛醿溼儭 醿犪儩醿� 醿斸儦醿愥優醿愥儬醿愥儥醿斸儜醿� 醿ａ儞醿愥儭醿⑨儯醿犪償醿� 醿犪儩醿� 醿愥儬醿♂償醿戓儩醿戓儭 醿撫儛 醿斸儝 醿ａ儥醿曖償 醿涐儩醿め償醿犪償醿戓儛醿愥儩.
醿椺儠醿樶儣醿濁儨 醿戓償醿犪儨醿� 醿め儤醿メ儬醿濁儜醿撫儛 醿犪儩醿� 50 醿償醿氠儴醿� 醿椺儛醿涐儛醿ㄡ償醿戓儤 醿愥儲醿愥儬 醿樶儛醿犪儭醿斸儜醿斸儜醿撫儛, 醿撫儛 醿犪儛醿� 醿愥儬 醿樶儛醿犪儭醿斸儜醿斸儜醿撫儛 醿樶儧醿斸儨醿� 醿♂儛醿償醿� 醿樶儺醿斸儠醿� 醿♂儛醿♂儮醿愥儠醿�. :醿撫儞 醿ａ儰醿犪儩 醿涐償醿⑨儤 醿犪儩醿氠償醿戓儤 醿撫儛 醿ａ儰醿犪儩 醿涐償醿⑨儤 醿椺儛醿涐儛醿ㄡ儤醿�. 醿撫儛 醿椺儛醿� 醿♂儩醿儤醿愥儦醿ａ儬 醿メ儭醿斸儦醿斸儜醿ㄡ儤 醿♂儛醿撫儛醿� 醿ａ儰醿犪儩 醿犪儣醿ａ儦醿樶儛 醿掅儛醿愥儬醿┽儤醿� 醿曖儤醿� 醿犪儛 醿椺儛醿涐儛醿ㄡ儭 醿椺儛醿涐儛醿ㄡ儩醿戓儭.
醿斸儬醿� 醿涐儩醿涐償醿溼儮醿ㄡ儤 醿戓償醿犪儨醿涐儛 醿メ儠醿斸儶醿溼儩醿戓儤醿斸儬醿� 醿ａ儰醿犪儩 醿氠儩醿掅儤醿欋儯醿犪儤 醿犪儛醿� 醿ａ儸醿濁儞醿� 醿曖儤醿撫儬醿� 醿儨醿濁儜醿樶償醿犪儭 醿撫儛 醿斸儭 醿儛醿愥儨 醿涐儩醿涐償醿儩醿溼儛.
醿犪儛醿涐儩醿撫償醿溼儤醿涐償 醿愥儞醿掅儤醿氠儛醿� 醿儛醿氠儤醿愥儨 醿♂償醿メ儭醿樶儭醿⑨儯醿犪儤 醿撫儛 醿搬儩醿涐儩醿め儩醿戓儤醿ａ儬醿� 醿ㄡ償醿樶儷醿氠償醿戓儛 醿涐儩醿斸儵醿曖償醿溼儩醿� 醿戓償醿曖儬醿�, 醿涐儛醿掅儬醿愥儧 醿儛醿氠儤醿愥儨 醿涐儩醿欋儬醿儛醿氠償醿戓儯醿氠儛醿� 醿氠儛醿炨儛醿犪儛醿欋儩醿戓儭 醿戓償醿犪儨醿� 醿撫儛 醿ㄡ償醿ａ儬醿愥儸醿п儩醿め儛醿� 醿曖償醿� 醿涐儤醿樶儲醿斸儜醿�. :醿撫儞
醿犪儛醿曖儤 醿儛醿愥儨 醿欋儛醿犪儝醿� 醿儤醿掅儨醿樶儛, 醿め儭醿樶儱醿濁儣醿斸儬醿愥優醿斸儠醿⑨償醿戓儭 醿儛醿愥儨 醿掅儛醿ａ儭醿儩醿犪儞醿斸儜醿愥儣 醿撫儛 醿愥儬醿愥儰醿♂儤醿メ儩醿椺償醿犪儛醿炨償醿曖儮醿斸儜醿♂儛醿� 醿撫儛醿斸儺醿涐儛醿犪償醿戓儛醿� 醿椺儛醿曖儤醿� 醿掅儛醿涐儩醿犪儥醿曖償醿曖儛醿ㄡ儤, 醿ㄡ償醿樶儷醿氠償醿戓儛 醿涐儛醿犪儣醿氠儛醿� 醿涐儴醿濁儜醿氠償醿戓儤醿� 醿ㄡ償醿掅儢醿樶儢醿︶儞醿斸儣, 醿涐儛醿掅儬醿愥儧 醿椺儠醿樶儣醿� 醿戓償醿犪儨醿涐儛 醿犪儩醿掅儩醿犪儶 醿椺儱醿曖儛 醿椺儛醿涐儛醿ㄡ償醿戓儤醿撫儛醿� 醿椺儛醿曖儤醿� 醿撫儛醿︶儸醿斸儠醿樶儭 醿掅儢醿� 醿儠醿斸儦 醿涐儴醿濁儜醿氠償醿戓儤醿� 醿⑨儬醿愥儞醿樶儶醿樶償醿戓儢醿� 醿愥儧醿愥儲醿氠償醿戓儛 醿撫儛 醿涐儴醿濁儜醿氠償醿戓儤醿♂儝醿愥儨 醿掅儛醿溼儣醿愥儠醿樶儭醿ａ儰醿氠償醿戓儛醿�.
April 29, 2020
Not a book I particularly enjoyed reading.
For one thing, the author uses a lot of strange terms throughout the book without ever properly defining them. I found myself constantly looking back to try and see if I missed something.
The writing style is also very jarring and generally hard to follow.
Another issue is that the main subject of this book, transactional analysis, is apparently a somewhat outdated model of human interactions, something I only found out about halfway through the book.
Overall, this book isn鈥檛 really a very reliable guide to analysing social interactions and human behaviours, which was what I was hoping it would be.
For one thing, the author uses a lot of strange terms throughout the book without ever properly defining them. I found myself constantly looking back to try and see if I missed something.
The writing style is also very jarring and generally hard to follow.
Another issue is that the main subject of this book, transactional analysis, is apparently a somewhat outdated model of human interactions, something I only found out about halfway through the book.
Overall, this book isn鈥檛 really a very reliable guide to analysing social interactions and human behaviours, which was what I was hoping it would be.
September 4, 2022
賱賲丕匕丕 賷鬲氐乇賮 丕賱賳丕爻 亘丕賱胤乇賯 丕賱鬲賷 賳乇丕賴丕 責
賲丕 丕賱匕賷 賷丿賵乇 賮賷 賳賮賵爻 丕賱丌禺乇賷賳 兀孬賳丕亍 鬲毓丕賲賱丕鬲賴賲 責
賴賱 鬲賲孬賱 丕賱鬲毓丕賲賱丕鬲 丕賱廿噩鬲賲丕毓賷丞 賳丕賮匕丞 賱賮賴賲 丕賱賳賮爻 丕賱亘卮乇賷丞 責
賱賲丕匕丕 賷賰乇乇 丕賱亘毓囟 鬲氐乇賮丕鬲 賳賲胤賷丞 賲丐匕賷丞 賱兀賳賮爻賴賲 賵賱賱丌禺乇賷賳 責
丕賱兀賱毓丕亘 丕賱賳賮爻賷丞. 鬲賱賰 廿噩丕亘丞 丕賱胤亘賷亘 丕賱賳賮爻賷 廿乇賷賰 亘賷乇賳貙 賲丐賱賮 丕賱賰鬲丕亘 賵賲卮賷丿 賳馗乇賷丞 丕賱鬲丨賱賷賱 丕賱鬲亘丕丿賱賷 賮賷 丕賱毓賱丕噩 丕賱賳賮爻賷貙 丕賱鬲賷 鬲賴丿賮 賱鬲丨賱賷賱 丕賱賳賮爻 亘賳丕亍 毓賱賶 丕賱賲毓丕賲賱丕鬲 丕賱廿噩鬲賲丕毓賷丞貙 賵丕賱毓賰爻.
賷賳賯爻賲 丕賱賰鬲丕亘 賱卮賯賷賳貨 丕賱噩夭亍 丕賱兀賵賱 鬲賲賴賷丿 賱賱賲賮丕賴賷賲 丕賱兀爻丕爻賷丞 丕賱鬲賷 鬲賯賵賲 毓賱賷賴丕 丕賱兀賱毓丕亘 丕賱賳賮爻賷賴貙 賵丕賱噩夭亍 丕賱孬丕賳賷 鬲賮氐賷賱 賱鬲賱賰 丕賱兀賱毓丕亘 賰賲丕 丕爻鬲禺賱氐賴丕 丕賱賰丕鬲亘 賲賳 禺亘乇鬲賴.
兀爻賱賵亘 丕賱賰丕鬲亘 氐毓亘 賵 賲毓賯丿. 賮賴賵 賱丕 賷爻賷乇 毓賱賶 賳賲胤 賷爻賴賱 賮賴賲賴 賱賱賯丕乇卅 丕賱毓丕丿賷貙 亘賱 賴賵 兀賯乇亘 賱丕爻鬲賰賲丕賱 賰鬲丕亘 爻丕亘賯貙 賮丕賱賰丕鬲亘 賷賮鬲乇囟 兀賳賰 亘丕賱賮毓賱 毓賱賶 丿乇丕賷丞 亘丕賱賲亘丕丿卅 丕賱乇卅賷爻賷丞 賱賳馗乇賷丞 丕賱鬲丨賱賷賱 丕賱鬲亘丕丿賱賷 Transactional analysis 賵賯丕丿乇 毓賱賶 賮賴賲 丕賱兀爻丕爻 丕賱賳賮爻賷 賱賱兀賱毓丕亘 丕賱賲禺鬲賱賮丞 亘爻賴賵賱丞. 丨鬲賶 兀賳 丕賱賰丕鬲亘 賷賯賵賲 亘匕賰乇 兀賲孬賱丞 賲賳 鬲賱賰 丕賱兀賱毓丕亘 賯亘賱 丕賱賵氐賵賱 賱卮乇丨 鬲賱賰 丕賱兀賱毓丕亘 ! 賷賲賰賳 鬲賮爻賷乇 匕賱賰 亘兀賳 丕賱賰鬲丕亘 賴賵 亘丕賱賮毓賱 丕爻鬲賰賲丕賱 賱賰鬲丕亘 爻丕亘賯 賱賳賮爻 丕賱賲丐賱賮貙 賵賱賰賳 賷丐禺匕 毓賱賷賴 丕丿毓丕丐賴 兀賳賴 賷賲賰賳 賮賴賲賴 亘爻賴賵賱丞 亘卮賰賱 賲賳賮氐賱.
賮賷 亘丿丕賷丞 賯乇丕卅鬲賷 兀氐丕亘賳賷 丕賱廿丨亘丕胤 賲賳 氐毓賵亘丞 丕賱兀爻賱賵亘 丕賱賲爻鬲禺丿賲 賵毓丿賲 賯丿乇鬲賷 毓賱賶 丕爻鬲賷毓丕亘賴貙 賵賰丿鬲 兀賳 兀鬲禺賱賶 毓賳 賯乇丕亍鬲賴貙 丨鬲賶 亘丿兀鬲 丕賱噩夭亍 丕賱孬丕賳賷貙 賵賴賵 -賰賲丕 毓賱賲鬲 賮賷賲丕 亘毓丿- 丕賱噩夭亍 丕賱匕賷 賷丨馗賶 亘丕賱丕賴鬲賲丕賲 丕賱兀賰亘乇 賵賰丕賳 爻亘亘丕 賮賷 丕賳鬲卮丕乇 丕賱賰鬲丕亘. 賱賱賵賴賱丞 丕賱兀賵賱賶 卮毓乇鬲 亘賲夭賷噩 賲賳 丕賱乇賴亘丞 賵丕賱丕賳亘賴丕乇. 賱賯丿 賰丕賳 丕賱賰丕鬲亘 賷氐賮 丨賷賱 賳賮爻賷丞 賳賲胤賷丞 賲兀賱賵賮丞 鬲賲丕賲丕貙 賷丨賱賱賴丕 賱賲賰賵賳丕鬲賴丕 丕賱賲噩乇丿丞貙 賵賷卮賷乇 廿賱賶 丕賱毓丕卅丿 丕賱賳賮爻賷 丕賱賳丕鬲噩 毓賳 賰賱 賲賳賴丕. 賱賲 兀爻鬲胤毓 賲賳毓 賳賮爻賷 賲賳 丕爻鬲乇噩丕毓 賲賵丕賯賮 賲禺鬲賱賮丞 賲乇乇鬲 亘賴丕 賱兀賳丕爻 兀毓乇賮賴賲 賵丌禺乇賷賳 毓乇賮鬲 毓賳賴賲 賵 賵噩丿鬲 鬲賱賰 丕賱兀賳賲丕胤 鬲賳胤亘賯 毓賱賷賴賲 鬲賲丕賲丕 賵亘丿賯丞 賲購乇亘賰丞. 賵賰匕丕 丕賳毓賰爻 鬲賮賰賷乇賷 毓賱賶 賳賮爻賷貙 賵賵噩丿鬲 兀賳賷 兀賯賵賲 亘匕賱賰 兀丨賷丕賳丕貙 亘廿丿乇丕賰 兀賵 亘丿賵賳. 賮賷 馗賳賷 兀賳 賱丨馗丞 丕賱丕爻鬲賳丕乇丞 鬲賱賰 賴賷 賲丕 卮毓乇 亘賴 賰賱 賲賳 賯乇兀 丕賱賰鬲丕亘貙 賵賴賷 爻亘亘 丕賳鬲卮丕乇賴 亘賷賳 兀賵爻丕胤 丕賱毓丕賲丞.
爻兀丨丕賵賱 丕禺鬲氐丕乇 丕賱賳馗乇賷丞 亘卮賰賱 賲亘爻胤 :
佟. 賰賱 胤賮賱 賲賵賱賵丿 賮賷 丨丕噩丞 廿賱賶 賳賵毓 賲賳 丕賱丕爻鬲孬丕乇丞. 賵賴賷 賮賷 匕賱賰 丕賱毓賲乇 丕爻鬲孬丕乇丞 丨爻賷丞 亘卮賰賱 兀爻丕爻賷. 亘賷賳賲丕 賷賰亘乇 賷馗賱 丕賱丕丨鬲賷丕噩 賲賵噩賵丿丕 亘賷賳賲丕 鬲賯賱 賲氐丕丿乇賴貙 賮賷亘丨孬 丕賱胤賮賱 毓賳 兀賯乇亘 賲氐丿乇 賱廿卮亘丕毓賴 丨鬲賶 賷噩丿賴 賮賷 兀亘爻胤 丕賱鬲毓丕賲賱丕鬲 丕賱丕噩鬲賲丕毓賷賴貙 賮賷賳賯賱亘 廿賱賶 丕丨鬲賷丕噩 賱賱丕爻鬲孬丕乇丞 丕賱丕噩鬲賲丕毓賷丞.
佗. 鬲馗賴乇 賱賱廿賳爻丕賳 丨丕噩丞 兀禺乇賶 賵賴賷 丨丕噩鬲賴 賱鬲賲囟賷丞 賵賯鬲賴 賮賷 賮毓賱 卮卅 賲丕 賱鬲賮丕丿賷 丕賱賲賱賱 丕賱賵噩賵丿賷貙 賮賷馗賴乇 丕賱丕丨鬲賷丕噩 賱鬲卮賰賷賱 兀賵 丕爻鬲賴賱丕賰 丕賱賵賯鬲.
伲. 賵噩賵丿 丕爻鬲孬丕乇丞 賲賳 兀賷 賳賵毓 兀賮囟賱 賲賳 毓丿賲 賵噩賵丿 兀賷 賲孬賷乇貙 爻賵丕亍 賰丕賳鬲 鬲賱賰 丕賱丕爻鬲孬丕乇丞 廿賷噩丕亘賷丞 兀賵 爻賱亘賷丞. (賵鬲賱賰 賳賯胤丞 賲丨賵乇賷丞 賮賷 爻亘亘 賵噩賵丿 亘毓囟 丕賱丨賷賱 丕賱賲丐匕賷丞 賱兀氐丨丕亘賴丕)
伽. 賲丕 賷丨鬲丕噩 廿賱賷賴 丕賱廿賳爻丕賳 賱廿卮亘丕毓 丨丕噩鬲賴 賱賱丕爻鬲孬丕乇賴 丕賱丕噩鬲賲丕毓賷丞 (丕賱賲賰丕賮卅丞 賱賱丨爻賷丞 賮賷 丨丿賷孬賷 丕賱賵賱丕丿丞) 賴賵 丕賱丨賲賷賲賷丞貨 亘賲毓賳丕賴丕 丕賱丨賯賷賯賷 賵賴賵 丕賱鬲賵丕氐賱 丕賱廿賳爻丕賳賷 丕賱毓賲賷賯 丕賱匕賷 賷鬲賲賷夭 亘丕賱丿賮卅 賵丕賱鬲賯亘賱 賵丕賱氐丿賯 賵丕賱丨亘.
佶. 賱兀賳 丕賱丨賲賷賲賷丞 氐毓亘丞 丕賱賲賳丕賱貙 賵賱丕 賳氐賱 廿賱賷賴丕 亘卮賰賱 爻賴賱 賲鬲賵丕氐賱貙 賵賯丿 賱丕 賷氐賱 廿賱賷賴丕 丕賱亘毓囟 兀亘丿丕貙 賮廿賳賳丕 賳賱噩兀 賱賱兀賱毓丕亘 丕賱廿噩鬲賲丕毓賷丞 丕賱賲禺鬲賱賮丞貙 賱廿卮亘丕毓 丨丕噩丕鬲賳丕 亘卮賰賱 賲睾丕賷乇 賱賱丨賲賷賲賷丞 丕賱氐丕丿賯丞.
佴. 亘丿丕禺賱 賰賱 賲賳丕 孬賱丕孬 匕賵丕鬲 賲禺鬲賱賮丞. 孬賱丕孬丞 賲賳 (丕賱兀賳丕) : 丕賱乇丕卮丿 賵丕賱兀亘 賵 丕賱胤賮賱.
侑. 賮賷 賰賱 賲毓丕賲賱丞 丕噩鬲賲丕毓賷丞 賷鬲禺匕 賰賱 卮禺氐 匕丕鬲 賲賳 丕賱孬賱丕孬丞貙 賵賷鬲禺匕 丕賱丌禺乇 匕丕鬲 兀禺乇賶 廿賲丕 賲賰丕賮卅丞 賱賱胤乇賮 丕賱兀賵賱 兀賵 賲睾丕賷乇丞 賱賴.
侉. 丕賱兀賱毓丕亘 賴賷 賲毓丕賲賱丕鬲 丕噩鬲賲丕毓賷丞 鬲鬲賲賷夭 亘丕賱禺丿丕毓貙 賮賮賷 馗丕賴乇賴丕 (丕賱丕噩鬲賲丕毓賷) 鬲賰賵賳 亘賷賳 丕賱匕丕鬲 丕賱乇丕卮丿丞 賮賷 賰賱 賲賳 丕賱胤乇賮賷賳貙 亘賷賳賲丕 賮賷 亘丕胤賳賴丕 (丕賱賳馗賷乇 丕賱爻丕賷賰賵賱賵噩賷) 鬲賰賵賳 亘賷賳 匕丕鬲賷賳 丌禺乇賷賳. 賴匕丕 賴賵 兀爻丕爻 丕賱兀賱毓丕亘. 賵 賷爻賲賷賴丕 丕賱賰丕鬲亘 兀賱毓丕亘 賱丕 鬲賯賱賷賱丕 賱兀賴賲賷鬲賴丕貙 亘賱 賱賰賵賳賴丕 賳賲胤賷丞貨 賱賴丕 賯賵丕毓丿 賵 兀丿賵丕乇 賵 賲爻丕乇 賲購鬲賵賯毓 賵賲賰丕賮兀丞 卮毓賵乇賷丞 禺鬲丕賲賷丞.
賲孬丕賱 毓賱賶 賱毓亘丞 :
賷毓乇囟 (爻) 賲卮賰賱丞 賲丕 毓賱賶 兀氐丿賯丕丐賴貙 賮賷爻丕乇毓賵丕 亘鬲賯丿賷賲 丨賱賵賱 賲賯鬲乇丨丞貙 賷賯賵賲 爻 亘乇賮囟賴丕 賵丕丨丿 鬲賱賵 丕賱丌禺乇貙 賲賵囟丨丕 賱賲丕匕丕 賱丕 賷氐賱丨 兀賷 賲賳賴賲 賱丨賱 賲卮賰賱鬲賴. 賷賳鬲賴賷 丕賱兀賲乇 亘氐賲鬲 丕賱兀氐丿賯丕亍貙 賵賴賵 鬲丨丿賷丿丕 賲丐卮乇 丕賳鬲氐丕乇 (爻) 賮賷 鬲賱賰 丕賱賱毓亘丞貙 丕賱鬲賷 鬲賴丿賮 賱乇賮囟 丕賱丨賱賵賱 亘丿賱丕 賲賳 鬲賯亘賱賴丕. 馗丕賴乇賷丕 賷亘丿賵 丕賱兀賲乇 鬲毓丕賲賱 亘賷賳 (乇丕卮丿) 爻 賲毓 (乇丕卮丿賷賳) 兀氐丿賯丕丐賴貙 亘賷賳賲丕 亘丕胤賳賷丕 鬲賯賵賲 丕賱賲毓丕賲賱丞 亘賷賳 (胤賮賱) 爻 丕賱毓賳賷丿 丕賱匕賷 賷噩丿 乇囟丕丐賴 賮賷 乇賮囟 丨賱賵賱 (丌亘丕亍) 兀氐丿賯丕丐賴.
賰匕賱賰 鬲鬲丿乇噩 丕賱兀賱毓丕亘 賮賷 丨丿鬲賴丕 賵鬲氐賲賷賲 賱丕毓亘賷賴丕 賲賳 兀賳賵丕毓 睾賷乇 賲丐匕賷丞 廿賱賶 兀卮賰丕賱 兀禺乇賶 兀賰孬乇 噩丿賷丞貙 賵兀丨賷丕賳丕 匕丕鬲 賳鬲丕卅噩 賰丕乇孬賷丞.
賲毓 丕爻鬲賰賲丕賱 賯乇丕卅鬲賷 賱賱賰鬲丕亘貙 賯賱 丕賳亘賴丕乇賷 亘丕賱兀賱毓丕亘 丕賱賲匕賰賵乇丞貙 賵賵噩丿鬲 亘毓囟賴丕 賲丨丕賵賱丞 賲賳 丕賱賰丕鬲亘 賱鬲毓賲賷賲 丕賱賳馗乇賷丞 亘卮賰賱 賲胤賱賯貙 賵鬲胤亘賷賯賴丕 賮賷 睾賷乇 賲賵囟毓賴丕貙 丨賷孬 乇亘賲丕 賷賰賵賳 丕賱丿丕毓賷 賱賱鬲氐乇賮 毓賵丕賲賱 兀禺乇賶 賲禺鬲賱賮丞.
賷噩丿乇 丕賱廿卮丕乇丞 亘兀賳 丕賱賰鬲丕亘 氐丕丿乇 賮賷 毓丕賲 佟侃佴伽貙 賮賷 賵賯鬲 賰丕賳鬲 賳馗乇賷丕鬲 賮乇賵賷丿 賲丕夭丕賱 賱賴丕 爻賷丕丿丞 賮賷 兀賵爻丕胤 丕賱鬲丨賱賷賱 丕賱賳賮爻賷貙 賵賳爻鬲胤賷毓 兀賳 賳賱賲爻 鬲兀孬乇 丕賱賰丕鬲亘 亘匕賱賰. 賵毓賱賷賴 賱丕 鬲丐禺匕 賰賱 丕賱賲賮丕賴賷賲 丕賱賲匕賰賵乇丞 亘卮賰賱 賲胤賱賯貨 賮亘毓囟賴丕 賷賲賷賱 賱賱賮賱爻賮丞 兀賰孬乇 賲賳 丕賱毓賱賲貙 賲孬賱 鬲賯爻賷賲 丕賱卮禺氐賷丞 廿賱賶 孬賱丕孬 匕賵丕鬲 賲禺鬲賱賮丞貙 賵賴賵 乇兀賷 -賵廿賳 亘丿丕 賲賳胤賯賷丕 兀丨賷丕賳丕貙 亘賱 賵賲賮賷丿 兀賷囟丕- 賱丕 賷賲賰賳 廿孬亘丕鬲賴 兀賵 賳賮賷賴 亘賲賳賴噩 毓賱賲賷. 賱匕丕 賷賳亘睾賷 兀禺匕 賲賮丕賴賷賲賴 亘丨匕乇 賱鬲賮丕丿賷 鬲毓賲賷賲賴丕 亘卮賰賱 爻丕匕噩貙 兀賵 丕賱鬲禺賵賮 賲賳賴丕 賱丿乇噩丞 丕賱亘丕乇丕賳賵賷丕 丕賱賲賮乇胤丞.
賮賷 丕賱賲噩賲賱 丕賱賰鬲丕亘 賲賮賷丿貙 賵賷賱賯賷 丕賱囟賵亍 毓賱賶 丕賱兀賱丕毓賷亘 丕賱賳賮爻賷丞 丕賱鬲賷 賷賱毓亘賴丕 丕賱賳丕爻貙 亘賲丕 賮賷賴賲 兀賳丕 賵兀賳鬲貙 爻賵丕亍 賰丕賳 匕賱賰 賮賷 賲噩丕賱 丕賱廿丿乇丕賰 兀賵 禺丕乇噩賴. 賲賲丕 賷賲丿賰 亘丕賱賵毓賷 丕賱賰丕賮賷 賱賱鬲毓丕賲賱 賲毓 兀賱毓丕亘 丕賱丌禺乇賷賳貙 賵廿丿乇丕賰 兀賱丕毓賷亘賰 丕賱卮禺氐賷丞貙 賵丕爻鬲亘丿丕賱賴丕 亘亘丨孬 毓賳 丨賲賷賲賷丞 氐丕丿賯丞.
兀禺鬲賲 亘丕賯鬲亘丕爻賷 丕賱賲賮囟賱 賮賷 禺丕鬲賲丞 丕賱賰鬲丕亘 :
"For certain fortunate people, there is something which transcends all classifications of behavior, and that is awareness; something which rises above the programming of the past, and that is spontaneity; and something that is more rewarding than games, and that is intimacy."
賲丕 丕賱匕賷 賷丿賵乇 賮賷 賳賮賵爻 丕賱丌禺乇賷賳 兀孬賳丕亍 鬲毓丕賲賱丕鬲賴賲 責
賴賱 鬲賲孬賱 丕賱鬲毓丕賲賱丕鬲 丕賱廿噩鬲賲丕毓賷丞 賳丕賮匕丞 賱賮賴賲 丕賱賳賮爻 丕賱亘卮乇賷丞 責
賱賲丕匕丕 賷賰乇乇 丕賱亘毓囟 鬲氐乇賮丕鬲 賳賲胤賷丞 賲丐匕賷丞 賱兀賳賮爻賴賲 賵賱賱丌禺乇賷賳 責
丕賱兀賱毓丕亘 丕賱賳賮爻賷丞. 鬲賱賰 廿噩丕亘丞 丕賱胤亘賷亘 丕賱賳賮爻賷 廿乇賷賰 亘賷乇賳貙 賲丐賱賮 丕賱賰鬲丕亘 賵賲卮賷丿 賳馗乇賷丞 丕賱鬲丨賱賷賱 丕賱鬲亘丕丿賱賷 賮賷 丕賱毓賱丕噩 丕賱賳賮爻賷貙 丕賱鬲賷 鬲賴丿賮 賱鬲丨賱賷賱 丕賱賳賮爻 亘賳丕亍 毓賱賶 丕賱賲毓丕賲賱丕鬲 丕賱廿噩鬲賲丕毓賷丞貙 賵丕賱毓賰爻.
賷賳賯爻賲 丕賱賰鬲丕亘 賱卮賯賷賳貨 丕賱噩夭亍 丕賱兀賵賱 鬲賲賴賷丿 賱賱賲賮丕賴賷賲 丕賱兀爻丕爻賷丞 丕賱鬲賷 鬲賯賵賲 毓賱賷賴丕 丕賱兀賱毓丕亘 丕賱賳賮爻賷賴貙 賵丕賱噩夭亍 丕賱孬丕賳賷 鬲賮氐賷賱 賱鬲賱賰 丕賱兀賱毓丕亘 賰賲丕 丕爻鬲禺賱氐賴丕 丕賱賰丕鬲亘 賲賳 禺亘乇鬲賴.
兀爻賱賵亘 丕賱賰丕鬲亘 氐毓亘 賵 賲毓賯丿. 賮賴賵 賱丕 賷爻賷乇 毓賱賶 賳賲胤 賷爻賴賱 賮賴賲賴 賱賱賯丕乇卅 丕賱毓丕丿賷貙 亘賱 賴賵 兀賯乇亘 賱丕爻鬲賰賲丕賱 賰鬲丕亘 爻丕亘賯貙 賮丕賱賰丕鬲亘 賷賮鬲乇囟 兀賳賰 亘丕賱賮毓賱 毓賱賶 丿乇丕賷丞 亘丕賱賲亘丕丿卅 丕賱乇卅賷爻賷丞 賱賳馗乇賷丞 丕賱鬲丨賱賷賱 丕賱鬲亘丕丿賱賷 Transactional analysis 賵賯丕丿乇 毓賱賶 賮賴賲 丕賱兀爻丕爻 丕賱賳賮爻賷 賱賱兀賱毓丕亘 丕賱賲禺鬲賱賮丞 亘爻賴賵賱丞. 丨鬲賶 兀賳 丕賱賰丕鬲亘 賷賯賵賲 亘匕賰乇 兀賲孬賱丞 賲賳 鬲賱賰 丕賱兀賱毓丕亘 賯亘賱 丕賱賵氐賵賱 賱卮乇丨 鬲賱賰 丕賱兀賱毓丕亘 ! 賷賲賰賳 鬲賮爻賷乇 匕賱賰 亘兀賳 丕賱賰鬲丕亘 賴賵 亘丕賱賮毓賱 丕爻鬲賰賲丕賱 賱賰鬲丕亘 爻丕亘賯 賱賳賮爻 丕賱賲丐賱賮貙 賵賱賰賳 賷丐禺匕 毓賱賷賴 丕丿毓丕丐賴 兀賳賴 賷賲賰賳 賮賴賲賴 亘爻賴賵賱丞 亘卮賰賱 賲賳賮氐賱.
賮賷 亘丿丕賷丞 賯乇丕卅鬲賷 兀氐丕亘賳賷 丕賱廿丨亘丕胤 賲賳 氐毓賵亘丞 丕賱兀爻賱賵亘 丕賱賲爻鬲禺丿賲 賵毓丿賲 賯丿乇鬲賷 毓賱賶 丕爻鬲賷毓丕亘賴貙 賵賰丿鬲 兀賳 兀鬲禺賱賶 毓賳 賯乇丕亍鬲賴貙 丨鬲賶 亘丿兀鬲 丕賱噩夭亍 丕賱孬丕賳賷貙 賵賴賵 -賰賲丕 毓賱賲鬲 賮賷賲丕 亘毓丿- 丕賱噩夭亍 丕賱匕賷 賷丨馗賶 亘丕賱丕賴鬲賲丕賲 丕賱兀賰亘乇 賵賰丕賳 爻亘亘丕 賮賷 丕賳鬲卮丕乇 丕賱賰鬲丕亘. 賱賱賵賴賱丞 丕賱兀賵賱賶 卮毓乇鬲 亘賲夭賷噩 賲賳 丕賱乇賴亘丞 賵丕賱丕賳亘賴丕乇. 賱賯丿 賰丕賳 丕賱賰丕鬲亘 賷氐賮 丨賷賱 賳賮爻賷丞 賳賲胤賷丞 賲兀賱賵賮丞 鬲賲丕賲丕貙 賷丨賱賱賴丕 賱賲賰賵賳丕鬲賴丕 丕賱賲噩乇丿丞貙 賵賷卮賷乇 廿賱賶 丕賱毓丕卅丿 丕賱賳賮爻賷 丕賱賳丕鬲噩 毓賳 賰賱 賲賳賴丕. 賱賲 兀爻鬲胤毓 賲賳毓 賳賮爻賷 賲賳 丕爻鬲乇噩丕毓 賲賵丕賯賮 賲禺鬲賱賮丞 賲乇乇鬲 亘賴丕 賱兀賳丕爻 兀毓乇賮賴賲 賵丌禺乇賷賳 毓乇賮鬲 毓賳賴賲 賵 賵噩丿鬲 鬲賱賰 丕賱兀賳賲丕胤 鬲賳胤亘賯 毓賱賷賴賲 鬲賲丕賲丕 賵亘丿賯丞 賲購乇亘賰丞. 賵賰匕丕 丕賳毓賰爻 鬲賮賰賷乇賷 毓賱賶 賳賮爻賷貙 賵賵噩丿鬲 兀賳賷 兀賯賵賲 亘匕賱賰 兀丨賷丕賳丕貙 亘廿丿乇丕賰 兀賵 亘丿賵賳. 賮賷 馗賳賷 兀賳 賱丨馗丞 丕賱丕爻鬲賳丕乇丞 鬲賱賰 賴賷 賲丕 卮毓乇 亘賴 賰賱 賲賳 賯乇兀 丕賱賰鬲丕亘貙 賵賴賷 爻亘亘 丕賳鬲卮丕乇賴 亘賷賳 兀賵爻丕胤 丕賱毓丕賲丞.
爻兀丨丕賵賱 丕禺鬲氐丕乇 丕賱賳馗乇賷丞 亘卮賰賱 賲亘爻胤 :
佟. 賰賱 胤賮賱 賲賵賱賵丿 賮賷 丨丕噩丞 廿賱賶 賳賵毓 賲賳 丕賱丕爻鬲孬丕乇丞. 賵賴賷 賮賷 匕賱賰 丕賱毓賲乇 丕爻鬲孬丕乇丞 丨爻賷丞 亘卮賰賱 兀爻丕爻賷. 亘賷賳賲丕 賷賰亘乇 賷馗賱 丕賱丕丨鬲賷丕噩 賲賵噩賵丿丕 亘賷賳賲丕 鬲賯賱 賲氐丕丿乇賴貙 賮賷亘丨孬 丕賱胤賮賱 毓賳 兀賯乇亘 賲氐丿乇 賱廿卮亘丕毓賴 丨鬲賶 賷噩丿賴 賮賷 兀亘爻胤 丕賱鬲毓丕賲賱丕鬲 丕賱丕噩鬲賲丕毓賷賴貙 賮賷賳賯賱亘 廿賱賶 丕丨鬲賷丕噩 賱賱丕爻鬲孬丕乇丞 丕賱丕噩鬲賲丕毓賷丞.
佗. 鬲馗賴乇 賱賱廿賳爻丕賳 丨丕噩丞 兀禺乇賶 賵賴賷 丨丕噩鬲賴 賱鬲賲囟賷丞 賵賯鬲賴 賮賷 賮毓賱 卮卅 賲丕 賱鬲賮丕丿賷 丕賱賲賱賱 丕賱賵噩賵丿賷貙 賮賷馗賴乇 丕賱丕丨鬲賷丕噩 賱鬲卮賰賷賱 兀賵 丕爻鬲賴賱丕賰 丕賱賵賯鬲.
伲. 賵噩賵丿 丕爻鬲孬丕乇丞 賲賳 兀賷 賳賵毓 兀賮囟賱 賲賳 毓丿賲 賵噩賵丿 兀賷 賲孬賷乇貙 爻賵丕亍 賰丕賳鬲 鬲賱賰 丕賱丕爻鬲孬丕乇丞 廿賷噩丕亘賷丞 兀賵 爻賱亘賷丞. (賵鬲賱賰 賳賯胤丞 賲丨賵乇賷丞 賮賷 爻亘亘 賵噩賵丿 亘毓囟 丕賱丨賷賱 丕賱賲丐匕賷丞 賱兀氐丨丕亘賴丕)
伽. 賲丕 賷丨鬲丕噩 廿賱賷賴 丕賱廿賳爻丕賳 賱廿卮亘丕毓 丨丕噩鬲賴 賱賱丕爻鬲孬丕乇賴 丕賱丕噩鬲賲丕毓賷丞 (丕賱賲賰丕賮卅丞 賱賱丨爻賷丞 賮賷 丨丿賷孬賷 丕賱賵賱丕丿丞) 賴賵 丕賱丨賲賷賲賷丞貨 亘賲毓賳丕賴丕 丕賱丨賯賷賯賷 賵賴賵 丕賱鬲賵丕氐賱 丕賱廿賳爻丕賳賷 丕賱毓賲賷賯 丕賱匕賷 賷鬲賲賷夭 亘丕賱丿賮卅 賵丕賱鬲賯亘賱 賵丕賱氐丿賯 賵丕賱丨亘.
佶. 賱兀賳 丕賱丨賲賷賲賷丞 氐毓亘丞 丕賱賲賳丕賱貙 賵賱丕 賳氐賱 廿賱賷賴丕 亘卮賰賱 爻賴賱 賲鬲賵丕氐賱貙 賵賯丿 賱丕 賷氐賱 廿賱賷賴丕 丕賱亘毓囟 兀亘丿丕貙 賮廿賳賳丕 賳賱噩兀 賱賱兀賱毓丕亘 丕賱廿噩鬲賲丕毓賷丞 丕賱賲禺鬲賱賮丞貙 賱廿卮亘丕毓 丨丕噩丕鬲賳丕 亘卮賰賱 賲睾丕賷乇 賱賱丨賲賷賲賷丞 丕賱氐丕丿賯丞.
佴. 亘丿丕禺賱 賰賱 賲賳丕 孬賱丕孬 匕賵丕鬲 賲禺鬲賱賮丞. 孬賱丕孬丞 賲賳 (丕賱兀賳丕) : 丕賱乇丕卮丿 賵丕賱兀亘 賵 丕賱胤賮賱.
侑. 賮賷 賰賱 賲毓丕賲賱丞 丕噩鬲賲丕毓賷丞 賷鬲禺匕 賰賱 卮禺氐 匕丕鬲 賲賳 丕賱孬賱丕孬丞貙 賵賷鬲禺匕 丕賱丌禺乇 匕丕鬲 兀禺乇賶 廿賲丕 賲賰丕賮卅丞 賱賱胤乇賮 丕賱兀賵賱 兀賵 賲睾丕賷乇丞 賱賴.
侉. 丕賱兀賱毓丕亘 賴賷 賲毓丕賲賱丕鬲 丕噩鬲賲丕毓賷丞 鬲鬲賲賷夭 亘丕賱禺丿丕毓貙 賮賮賷 馗丕賴乇賴丕 (丕賱丕噩鬲賲丕毓賷) 鬲賰賵賳 亘賷賳 丕賱匕丕鬲 丕賱乇丕卮丿丞 賮賷 賰賱 賲賳 丕賱胤乇賮賷賳貙 亘賷賳賲丕 賮賷 亘丕胤賳賴丕 (丕賱賳馗賷乇 丕賱爻丕賷賰賵賱賵噩賷) 鬲賰賵賳 亘賷賳 匕丕鬲賷賳 丌禺乇賷賳. 賴匕丕 賴賵 兀爻丕爻 丕賱兀賱毓丕亘. 賵 賷爻賲賷賴丕 丕賱賰丕鬲亘 兀賱毓丕亘 賱丕 鬲賯賱賷賱丕 賱兀賴賲賷鬲賴丕貙 亘賱 賱賰賵賳賴丕 賳賲胤賷丞貨 賱賴丕 賯賵丕毓丿 賵 兀丿賵丕乇 賵 賲爻丕乇 賲購鬲賵賯毓 賵賲賰丕賮兀丞 卮毓賵乇賷丞 禺鬲丕賲賷丞.
賲孬丕賱 毓賱賶 賱毓亘丞 :
賷毓乇囟 (爻) 賲卮賰賱丞 賲丕 毓賱賶 兀氐丿賯丕丐賴貙 賮賷爻丕乇毓賵丕 亘鬲賯丿賷賲 丨賱賵賱 賲賯鬲乇丨丞貙 賷賯賵賲 爻 亘乇賮囟賴丕 賵丕丨丿 鬲賱賵 丕賱丌禺乇貙 賲賵囟丨丕 賱賲丕匕丕 賱丕 賷氐賱丨 兀賷 賲賳賴賲 賱丨賱 賲卮賰賱鬲賴. 賷賳鬲賴賷 丕賱兀賲乇 亘氐賲鬲 丕賱兀氐丿賯丕亍貙 賵賴賵 鬲丨丿賷丿丕 賲丐卮乇 丕賳鬲氐丕乇 (爻) 賮賷 鬲賱賰 丕賱賱毓亘丞貙 丕賱鬲賷 鬲賴丿賮 賱乇賮囟 丕賱丨賱賵賱 亘丿賱丕 賲賳 鬲賯亘賱賴丕. 馗丕賴乇賷丕 賷亘丿賵 丕賱兀賲乇 鬲毓丕賲賱 亘賷賳 (乇丕卮丿) 爻 賲毓 (乇丕卮丿賷賳) 兀氐丿賯丕丐賴貙 亘賷賳賲丕 亘丕胤賳賷丕 鬲賯賵賲 丕賱賲毓丕賲賱丞 亘賷賳 (胤賮賱) 爻 丕賱毓賳賷丿 丕賱匕賷 賷噩丿 乇囟丕丐賴 賮賷 乇賮囟 丨賱賵賱 (丌亘丕亍) 兀氐丿賯丕丐賴.
賰匕賱賰 鬲鬲丿乇噩 丕賱兀賱毓丕亘 賮賷 丨丿鬲賴丕 賵鬲氐賲賷賲 賱丕毓亘賷賴丕 賲賳 兀賳賵丕毓 睾賷乇 賲丐匕賷丞 廿賱賶 兀卮賰丕賱 兀禺乇賶 兀賰孬乇 噩丿賷丞貙 賵兀丨賷丕賳丕 匕丕鬲 賳鬲丕卅噩 賰丕乇孬賷丞.
賲毓 丕爻鬲賰賲丕賱 賯乇丕卅鬲賷 賱賱賰鬲丕亘貙 賯賱 丕賳亘賴丕乇賷 亘丕賱兀賱毓丕亘 丕賱賲匕賰賵乇丞貙 賵賵噩丿鬲 亘毓囟賴丕 賲丨丕賵賱丞 賲賳 丕賱賰丕鬲亘 賱鬲毓賲賷賲 丕賱賳馗乇賷丞 亘卮賰賱 賲胤賱賯貙 賵鬲胤亘賷賯賴丕 賮賷 睾賷乇 賲賵囟毓賴丕貙 丨賷孬 乇亘賲丕 賷賰賵賳 丕賱丿丕毓賷 賱賱鬲氐乇賮 毓賵丕賲賱 兀禺乇賶 賲禺鬲賱賮丞.
賷噩丿乇 丕賱廿卮丕乇丞 亘兀賳 丕賱賰鬲丕亘 氐丕丿乇 賮賷 毓丕賲 佟侃佴伽貙 賮賷 賵賯鬲 賰丕賳鬲 賳馗乇賷丕鬲 賮乇賵賷丿 賲丕夭丕賱 賱賴丕 爻賷丕丿丞 賮賷 兀賵爻丕胤 丕賱鬲丨賱賷賱 丕賱賳賮爻賷貙 賵賳爻鬲胤賷毓 兀賳 賳賱賲爻 鬲兀孬乇 丕賱賰丕鬲亘 亘匕賱賰. 賵毓賱賷賴 賱丕 鬲丐禺匕 賰賱 丕賱賲賮丕賴賷賲 丕賱賲匕賰賵乇丞 亘卮賰賱 賲胤賱賯貨 賮亘毓囟賴丕 賷賲賷賱 賱賱賮賱爻賮丞 兀賰孬乇 賲賳 丕賱毓賱賲貙 賲孬賱 鬲賯爻賷賲 丕賱卮禺氐賷丞 廿賱賶 孬賱丕孬 匕賵丕鬲 賲禺鬲賱賮丞貙 賵賴賵 乇兀賷 -賵廿賳 亘丿丕 賲賳胤賯賷丕 兀丨賷丕賳丕貙 亘賱 賵賲賮賷丿 兀賷囟丕- 賱丕 賷賲賰賳 廿孬亘丕鬲賴 兀賵 賳賮賷賴 亘賲賳賴噩 毓賱賲賷. 賱匕丕 賷賳亘睾賷 兀禺匕 賲賮丕賴賷賲賴 亘丨匕乇 賱鬲賮丕丿賷 鬲毓賲賷賲賴丕 亘卮賰賱 爻丕匕噩貙 兀賵 丕賱鬲禺賵賮 賲賳賴丕 賱丿乇噩丞 丕賱亘丕乇丕賳賵賷丕 丕賱賲賮乇胤丞.
賮賷 丕賱賲噩賲賱 丕賱賰鬲丕亘 賲賮賷丿貙 賵賷賱賯賷 丕賱囟賵亍 毓賱賶 丕賱兀賱丕毓賷亘 丕賱賳賮爻賷丞 丕賱鬲賷 賷賱毓亘賴丕 丕賱賳丕爻貙 亘賲丕 賮賷賴賲 兀賳丕 賵兀賳鬲貙 爻賵丕亍 賰丕賳 匕賱賰 賮賷 賲噩丕賱 丕賱廿丿乇丕賰 兀賵 禺丕乇噩賴. 賲賲丕 賷賲丿賰 亘丕賱賵毓賷 丕賱賰丕賮賷 賱賱鬲毓丕賲賱 賲毓 兀賱毓丕亘 丕賱丌禺乇賷賳貙 賵廿丿乇丕賰 兀賱丕毓賷亘賰 丕賱卮禺氐賷丞貙 賵丕爻鬲亘丿丕賱賴丕 亘亘丨孬 毓賳 丨賲賷賲賷丞 氐丕丿賯丞.
兀禺鬲賲 亘丕賯鬲亘丕爻賷 丕賱賲賮囟賱 賮賷 禺丕鬲賲丞 丕賱賰鬲丕亘 :
"For certain fortunate people, there is something which transcends all classifications of behavior, and that is awareness; something which rises above the programming of the past, and that is spontaneity; and something that is more rewarding than games, and that is intimacy."
February 11, 2015
丕夭 讴鬲丕亘 賴丕蹖蹖 讴賴 禺賵賳丿賳卮 亘乇 賴乇讴丿丕賲 丕夭 丕亘賳蹖丕亍 亘卮乇 賵丕噩亘 鬲丕讴蹖丿蹖 爻鬲.
鬲賲丕賲 夭賳丿诏蹖 丕賳爻丕賳 乇賵 丿爻鬲賴 亘賳丿蹖 賲蹖 讴賳賴貙 賵 蹖讴蹖 丕夭 夭蹖乇-夭蹖乇-亘禺卮 賴丕卮 乇賵 讴賴 鬲亘丕丿賱 賴丕蹖 賲囟丕毓賮 蹖丕 亘丕夭蹖 賴丕蹖 丕噩鬲賲丕毓蹖 賳丕賲 丿丕乇賴貙 卮乇丨 賲蹖丿賴.
亘乇賳 鬲賵囟蹖丨 賲蹖丿賴 讴賴 丕賳爻丕賳 爻賴 賵噩賴賴 卮禺氐蹖鬲蹖 丿丕乇賴. 讴賵丿讴貙 讴賴 鬲賲丕賲 乇賮鬲丕乇 賴丕蹖 禺賱丕賯丕賳賴 賵 賯丕賳賵賳 卮讴賳 賵 爻丕丿賴 丕夭卮 賲賳卮丕 賲蹖卮賴. 賵丕賱丿貙 讴賴 噩賳亘賴 卮禺氐蹖鬲蹖賴 讴賴 賳氐蹖丨鬲 賲蹖 讴賳賴貙 亘夭乇诏爻丕賱丕賳賴 爻鬲 賵 丿乇賵丕賯毓 丕孬乇蹖賴 讴賴 賵丕賱丿蹖賳 賲丕 鬲賵蹖 賲丕 亘賴 噩丕 诏匕丕卮鬲賳 賵 賲丕 賴賲 丕賵賳 乇賵 亘賴 亘趩賴 賴丕賲賵賳 賲賳鬲賯賱 賲蹖 讴賳蹖賲. 賵 亘丕賱丕禺乇賴 亘丕賱睾貙 讴賴 噩賳亘賴 讴丕賲賱丕 賲賳胤賯蹖 賵 鬲丕孬蹖乇賳丕倬匕蹖乇 丕夭 丕丨爻丕爻丕鬲賴.
鬲亘丕丿賱 賴丕蹖 賲囟丕毓賮貙 蹖丕 亘丕夭蹖 賴丕蹖 丕噩鬲賲丕毓蹖貙 鬲亘丕丿賱 賴丕蹖蹖 賴爻鬲賳 讴賴 蹖讴 馗丕賴乇 丿丕乇賳 賵 蹖讴 亘丕胤賳. 丿乇 馗丕賴乇貙 卮丕蹖丿 亘賴 賳馗乇 亘乇爻賴 丿賵 賳賮乇 丿丕乇賳 亘丕 賵噩賴賴 亘丕賱睾卮賵賳 亘丕 賴賲 氐丨亘鬲 賵 鬲毓丕賲賱 賲蹖 讴賳賳. 丕賲丕 亘丕 亘乇乇爻蹖 乇賵丕賳卮賳丕禺鬲蹖 賲卮禺氐 賲蹖卮賴 丕蹖賳 鬲亘丕丿賱 亘丕賱睾-亘丕賱睾 賳蹖爻鬲貙 亘賱讴賴 讴賵丿讴-賵丕賱丿賴. 丕蹖賳 乇賵丕亘胤 亘丕夭蹖 賳丕賲 丿丕乇賳.
丕蹖賳 讴鬲丕亘 鬲毓丿丕丿 夭蹖丕丿蹖 丕夭 亘丕夭蹖 賴丕 乇賵 賲毓乇賮蹖 賵 亘乇乇爻蹖 賲蹖 讴賳賴 賵 亘乇丕卮賵賳 乇賵卮 賲賯丕亘賱賴 蹖丕 丌賳鬲蹖 鬲夭 丕乇丕卅賴 賲蹖丿賴.
亘丕 禺賵賳丿賳卮貙 賲蹖鬲賵賳蹖丿 亘丕 乇賵蹖賴 鬲丕乇蹖讴 賵 禺賵丿禺賵丕賴鬲賵賳 丌卮賳丕 亘卮蹖丿 賵 亘賮賴賲蹖丿 卮賲丕 趩蹖夭蹖 讴賴 禺賵丿鬲賵賳 賮讴乇 賲蹖 讴賳蹖丿 賳蹖爻鬲蹖丿. 丿賱蹖賱 禺蹖賱蹖 丕夭 乇賮鬲丕乇 賴丕蹖 禺賵丿 賵 丕胤乇丕賮蹖丕賳鬲賵賳 乇賵 丿乇讴 賲蹖 讴賳蹖丿 賵 夭賳丿诏蹖鬲賵賳 亘蹖 卮讴 蹖讴 丿乇噩賴 蹖 亘夭乇诏 丕乇鬲賯丕 倬蹖丿丕 賲蹖 讴賳賴.
卮丿蹖丿賳 鬲賵氐蹖賴 賲蹖卮賴.
鬲賲丕賲 夭賳丿诏蹖 丕賳爻丕賳 乇賵 丿爻鬲賴 亘賳丿蹖 賲蹖 讴賳賴貙 賵 蹖讴蹖 丕夭 夭蹖乇-夭蹖乇-亘禺卮 賴丕卮 乇賵 讴賴 鬲亘丕丿賱 賴丕蹖 賲囟丕毓賮 蹖丕 亘丕夭蹖 賴丕蹖 丕噩鬲賲丕毓蹖 賳丕賲 丿丕乇賴貙 卮乇丨 賲蹖丿賴.
亘乇賳 鬲賵囟蹖丨 賲蹖丿賴 讴賴 丕賳爻丕賳 爻賴 賵噩賴賴 卮禺氐蹖鬲蹖 丿丕乇賴. 讴賵丿讴貙 讴賴 鬲賲丕賲 乇賮鬲丕乇 賴丕蹖 禺賱丕賯丕賳賴 賵 賯丕賳賵賳 卮讴賳 賵 爻丕丿賴 丕夭卮 賲賳卮丕 賲蹖卮賴. 賵丕賱丿貙 讴賴 噩賳亘賴 卮禺氐蹖鬲蹖賴 讴賴 賳氐蹖丨鬲 賲蹖 讴賳賴貙 亘夭乇诏爻丕賱丕賳賴 爻鬲 賵 丿乇賵丕賯毓 丕孬乇蹖賴 讴賴 賵丕賱丿蹖賳 賲丕 鬲賵蹖 賲丕 亘賴 噩丕 诏匕丕卮鬲賳 賵 賲丕 賴賲 丕賵賳 乇賵 亘賴 亘趩賴 賴丕賲賵賳 賲賳鬲賯賱 賲蹖 讴賳蹖賲. 賵 亘丕賱丕禺乇賴 亘丕賱睾貙 讴賴 噩賳亘賴 讴丕賲賱丕 賲賳胤賯蹖 賵 鬲丕孬蹖乇賳丕倬匕蹖乇 丕夭 丕丨爻丕爻丕鬲賴.
鬲亘丕丿賱 賴丕蹖 賲囟丕毓賮貙 蹖丕 亘丕夭蹖 賴丕蹖 丕噩鬲賲丕毓蹖貙 鬲亘丕丿賱 賴丕蹖蹖 賴爻鬲賳 讴賴 蹖讴 馗丕賴乇 丿丕乇賳 賵 蹖讴 亘丕胤賳. 丿乇 馗丕賴乇貙 卮丕蹖丿 亘賴 賳馗乇 亘乇爻賴 丿賵 賳賮乇 丿丕乇賳 亘丕 賵噩賴賴 亘丕賱睾卮賵賳 亘丕 賴賲 氐丨亘鬲 賵 鬲毓丕賲賱 賲蹖 讴賳賳. 丕賲丕 亘丕 亘乇乇爻蹖 乇賵丕賳卮賳丕禺鬲蹖 賲卮禺氐 賲蹖卮賴 丕蹖賳 鬲亘丕丿賱 亘丕賱睾-亘丕賱睾 賳蹖爻鬲貙 亘賱讴賴 讴賵丿讴-賵丕賱丿賴. 丕蹖賳 乇賵丕亘胤 亘丕夭蹖 賳丕賲 丿丕乇賳.
丕蹖賳 讴鬲丕亘 鬲毓丿丕丿 夭蹖丕丿蹖 丕夭 亘丕夭蹖 賴丕 乇賵 賲毓乇賮蹖 賵 亘乇乇爻蹖 賲蹖 讴賳賴 賵 亘乇丕卮賵賳 乇賵卮 賲賯丕亘賱賴 蹖丕 丌賳鬲蹖 鬲夭 丕乇丕卅賴 賲蹖丿賴.
亘丕 禺賵賳丿賳卮貙 賲蹖鬲賵賳蹖丿 亘丕 乇賵蹖賴 鬲丕乇蹖讴 賵 禺賵丿禺賵丕賴鬲賵賳 丌卮賳丕 亘卮蹖丿 賵 亘賮賴賲蹖丿 卮賲丕 趩蹖夭蹖 讴賴 禺賵丿鬲賵賳 賮讴乇 賲蹖 讴賳蹖丿 賳蹖爻鬲蹖丿. 丿賱蹖賱 禺蹖賱蹖 丕夭 乇賮鬲丕乇 賴丕蹖 禺賵丿 賵 丕胤乇丕賮蹖丕賳鬲賵賳 乇賵 丿乇讴 賲蹖 讴賳蹖丿 賵 夭賳丿诏蹖鬲賵賳 亘蹖 卮讴 蹖讴 丿乇噩賴 蹖 亘夭乇诏 丕乇鬲賯丕 倬蹖丿丕 賲蹖 讴賳賴.
卮丿蹖丿賳 鬲賵氐蹖賴 賲蹖卮賴.
March 15, 2019
Ir labai patiko, ir nervavo, ir m膮s膷iau, kad tai tur臈t懦 b奴ti required reading. Taigi 啪vaig啪dut臈s ir prid臈tos, ir nuimtos per kan膷ias.
Knyga - transakcin臈s (santyki懦) psichoanaliz臈s / psichologijos vadov臈lis; ji pirmiausia para拧yta specialistams/臈ms, ir tai justi: daug kas visai neai拧kinama, tik prob臈g拧miais mestelima, o tau jau galva d啪i奴na nuo info ir nebesupranti, ar 膷ia buvo esmin臈 pastaba, ar ne. Ir prie拧ingai: daug d臈mesio skiriama tam, kaip apra拧yti atvej寞, kokia galima jo raida ir sprendimo b奴dai. Taip pat: skai膷iau sen膮 leidim膮 ("Vagos" psichologijos knyg懦 serijos); ne啪inau, ar naujas geresnis, bet seno vertimo klaidos buvo net su tu拧inuku vietomis pataisytos ankstesni懦 skaitytoj懦. Gal ir tas gal臈jo prisid臈t prie 寞sp奴d啪io, kad daug kas nuk膮sta, u啪mesta, i拧vardyta kaip konspektuose.
Bet labai patiko du dalykai.
Vienas - tai, d臈l ko skai膷iau; 啪aidimo kaip soc. ir psichologin臈s s膮veikos samprata ir 寞vairi懦 啪aidim懦 apra拧ymas, pastabos, kokie vaidmenys dalyvauja vienam ar kitam 啪aidime - santykyje tarp 啪moni懦. Pvz, net i拧si啪iojus skai膷iau apie 啪aidim膮 "Alkoholikas" - kod臈l, kokiu tikslu jis 啪aid啪iamas, kiek 啪aid臈j懦 turi dalyvauti, k膮 膷ia veikia "gelb臈tojas" (kuri/s b奴tinai privalo b奴ti ir t. t.). Tas apra拧ytas labai i拧samiai; daugeliui kit懦 啪aidim懦 vietos skiriama ma啪iau arba jie tiesiog paminimi: 拧tai 拧it膮 啪aid啪ia moterys tada ir tada.
Labai gera dalis: kiekvieno 啪aidimo apra拧ymo gale trumpi 拧kicai, kokiai baimei ar apskritai psichologiniam turiniui pasl臈pti / realizuoti ar pan. yra 啪aid啪iamas tas 啪aidimas. Pvz, vieni susij臋 su kalte ir jos atsikratymu, kiti - su artumo baime, treti - su noru kontroliuoti.
Visi tie dalykai skirtingi, ir t膮 pravartu prisimint, nes buitiniam psichologizavime (kai kair臈n de拧in臈n diagnozuoji sau ar kitiems A, B ir C) viskas da啪niausiai subendrinama 寞 ka啪kokius labai abstrak膷ius teiginius: 啪mon臈s siekia galios, 啪mon臈s ginasi. 沤od啪iu, jei skaitai 拧it膮 knyg膮 su tikslu geriau suprasti pasaul寞, bet pirmiau - save, bus daug naudos. O juk tas ir yra psichologin臈s literat奴ros malonumas+dalia.
Antras dalykas - visai nesitik臈jau, gal banalu, bet ka啪kaip nebuvau apie tai pagalvojus. Tai pati pamatin臈 knygos prielaida - kam 啪mon臈s 啪aid啪ia tuos 啪aidimus. O 啪aid啪ia tam, kad sustrukt奴ruot懦 laik膮 - kad jis 寞gyt懦 prasm臋, nes be to tai - arba beprasmis laukimas, kas bus nuo gimimo iki mirties, arba ka啪koks mistinis (g膮sdinantis) s膮lytis su pasauliu, buvimas "膷ia ir dabar". 艩ito pos奴kio nesitik臈jau, atrod臈 keista, gal perd臈m njueid啪i拧ka. Bet bandymas strukt奴ruoti laik膮, tai, kad i拧 esm臈s mes daugeliu santyki懦 ir bendravim懦 tik norim ka啪kuo susi寞dominti gyvenim膮 - apie t膮 nebuvau pagalvojus. Apie soc. interakcijas ir manipuliacijas visada galvodavau labiau kaip apie i拧likimo dalyk膮 - kad griebiesi to i拧 b臈dos. Bet gal ir ne.
Galiausiai numu拧iau 啪vaig啪du膷i懦 u啪 tai, kokia tai vis d臈lto bevilti拧kai pasenusi knyga - diskurso at啪vilgiu. Moteris Berne'as apra拧in臈ja vos ne kaip Freudas - visos manipuliator臈s, visos nesaugios; kai kur specifikuoja: vienus 啪aidimus 啪aid啪ia "pagyvenusios moterys air臈s", kitus paaugl臈s, tre膷ius dar kitokios. Tas pats ir tautiniu pagrindu: va 4-ojo de拧imtme膷io pab臈g臈liai i拧 Vokietijos turi daug baimi懦 ir da啪nai i拧krenta i拧 terapijos. Labadiena? Kai tok寞 dalyk膮 perskaitai, vis pagalvoji - o gal ir ta 啪aidim懦 analiz臈 yra nubrai啪yta va taip, ant 5 stereotip懦 ir su 0 d臈mesio 啪mogaus backgroundui. Tokia strukt奴ralistin臈, teorin臈. 漠domi, kaip ir teisinga, bet - gal tik dar viena schema, kurios gra啪iai atrodo, bet i拧m膮stytos logi拧kai, ne i拧dirbtos per 寞vairiapus寞 bendravim膮 su 啪mon臈m.
Knyga - transakcin臈s (santyki懦) psichoanaliz臈s / psichologijos vadov臈lis; ji pirmiausia para拧yta specialistams/臈ms, ir tai justi: daug kas visai neai拧kinama, tik prob臈g拧miais mestelima, o tau jau galva d啪i奴na nuo info ir nebesupranti, ar 膷ia buvo esmin臈 pastaba, ar ne. Ir prie拧ingai: daug d臈mesio skiriama tam, kaip apra拧yti atvej寞, kokia galima jo raida ir sprendimo b奴dai. Taip pat: skai膷iau sen膮 leidim膮 ("Vagos" psichologijos knyg懦 serijos); ne啪inau, ar naujas geresnis, bet seno vertimo klaidos buvo net su tu拧inuku vietomis pataisytos ankstesni懦 skaitytoj懦. Gal ir tas gal臈jo prisid臈t prie 寞sp奴d啪io, kad daug kas nuk膮sta, u啪mesta, i拧vardyta kaip konspektuose.
Bet labai patiko du dalykai.
Vienas - tai, d臈l ko skai膷iau; 啪aidimo kaip soc. ir psichologin臈s s膮veikos samprata ir 寞vairi懦 啪aidim懦 apra拧ymas, pastabos, kokie vaidmenys dalyvauja vienam ar kitam 啪aidime - santykyje tarp 啪moni懦. Pvz, net i拧si啪iojus skai膷iau apie 啪aidim膮 "Alkoholikas" - kod臈l, kokiu tikslu jis 啪aid啪iamas, kiek 啪aid臈j懦 turi dalyvauti, k膮 膷ia veikia "gelb臈tojas" (kuri/s b奴tinai privalo b奴ti ir t. t.). Tas apra拧ytas labai i拧samiai; daugeliui kit懦 啪aidim懦 vietos skiriama ma啪iau arba jie tiesiog paminimi: 拧tai 拧it膮 啪aid啪ia moterys tada ir tada.
Labai gera dalis: kiekvieno 啪aidimo apra拧ymo gale trumpi 拧kicai, kokiai baimei ar apskritai psichologiniam turiniui pasl臈pti / realizuoti ar pan. yra 啪aid啪iamas tas 啪aidimas. Pvz, vieni susij臋 su kalte ir jos atsikratymu, kiti - su artumo baime, treti - su noru kontroliuoti.
Visi tie dalykai skirtingi, ir t膮 pravartu prisimint, nes buitiniam psichologizavime (kai kair臈n de拧in臈n diagnozuoji sau ar kitiems A, B ir C) viskas da啪niausiai subendrinama 寞 ka啪kokius labai abstrak膷ius teiginius: 啪mon臈s siekia galios, 啪mon臈s ginasi. 沤od啪iu, jei skaitai 拧it膮 knyg膮 su tikslu geriau suprasti pasaul寞, bet pirmiau - save, bus daug naudos. O juk tas ir yra psichologin臈s literat奴ros malonumas+dalia.
Antras dalykas - visai nesitik臈jau, gal banalu, bet ka啪kaip nebuvau apie tai pagalvojus. Tai pati pamatin臈 knygos prielaida - kam 啪mon臈s 啪aid啪ia tuos 啪aidimus. O 啪aid啪ia tam, kad sustrukt奴ruot懦 laik膮 - kad jis 寞gyt懦 prasm臋, nes be to tai - arba beprasmis laukimas, kas bus nuo gimimo iki mirties, arba ka啪koks mistinis (g膮sdinantis) s膮lytis su pasauliu, buvimas "膷ia ir dabar". 艩ito pos奴kio nesitik臈jau, atrod臈 keista, gal perd臈m njueid啪i拧ka. Bet bandymas strukt奴ruoti laik膮, tai, kad i拧 esm臈s mes daugeliu santyki懦 ir bendravim懦 tik norim ka啪kuo susi寞dominti gyvenim膮 - apie t膮 nebuvau pagalvojus. Apie soc. interakcijas ir manipuliacijas visada galvodavau labiau kaip apie i拧likimo dalyk膮 - kad griebiesi to i拧 b臈dos. Bet gal ir ne.
Galiausiai numu拧iau 啪vaig啪du膷i懦 u啪 tai, kokia tai vis d臈lto bevilti拧kai pasenusi knyga - diskurso at啪vilgiu. Moteris Berne'as apra拧in臈ja vos ne kaip Freudas - visos manipuliator臈s, visos nesaugios; kai kur specifikuoja: vienus 啪aidimus 啪aid啪ia "pagyvenusios moterys air臈s", kitus paaugl臈s, tre膷ius dar kitokios. Tas pats ir tautiniu pagrindu: va 4-ojo de拧imtme膷io pab臈g臈liai i拧 Vokietijos turi daug baimi懦 ir da啪nai i拧krenta i拧 terapijos. Labadiena? Kai tok寞 dalyk膮 perskaitai, vis pagalvoji - o gal ir ta 啪aidim懦 analiz臈 yra nubrai啪yta va taip, ant 5 stereotip懦 ir su 0 d臈mesio 啪mogaus backgroundui. Tokia strukt奴ralistin臈, teorin臈. 漠domi, kaip ir teisinga, bet - gal tik dar viena schema, kurios gra啪iai atrodo, bet i拧m膮stytos logi拧kai, ne i拧dirbtos per 寞vairiapus寞 bendravim膮 su 啪mon臈m.
March 4, 2015
The basic idea behind this book -- that human interactions often follow patterns, and many of these patterns can be described in the manner of games and understood better if analyzed as such -- is fundamentally sound, and a really useful paradigm. The book contains a lot of victim-blaming and creepy gender constructions, which detract from the overall message. But I found the basic concepts to be valuable, and would be really interested to read more contemporary, less misogynistic perspectives on this topic.
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