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But there has always been an unspoken tension. There is always this sense that we haven’t followed through on our plan. He still, all these years later, shines brighter to me than other people.
By the time we’re in his bed, it feels as if we never left each other. It feels as if we never broke up, my parents never moved, I never started dating Chris Rodriguez, and Ethan never met Alicia Foster. It feels as if I never felt the chill of Boston in my hands or the wind of D.C. in my hair. As if I never felt the rain of Portland and Seattle on my shoulders or the heat of Austin on my skin. It’s as if New York City, and all of its disappointments, never entered my heart. It feels as if I finally made a good decision for once.
I know there may be universes out there where I made different choices that led me somewhere else, led me to someone else.� He looks at Gabby. “And my heart breaks for every single version of me that didn’t end up with you.�
