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Breanna > Breanna's Quotes

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#1

“The best defense is a confusing offense.”
― Kimberly Pauley, Still Sucks to Be Me: More All-True Confessions of Mina Hamilton Smith, Teen Vampire

tags: humor, relationships, tactics

47 likes

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#2

“If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Then quit. No use being a damn fool about it.”
― W.C. Fields

tags: humor, success

7430 likes

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#3

“Vivian, I'd like to give you my heart, but since that might be inconvenient I've brought you someone else's."

"Rafe you jerk, this is a sheep's heart.”
― Annette Curtis Klause, Blood and Chocolate

tags: humor, threat

24 likes

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#4

“Film lovers are sick people.”
― Fran莽ois Truffaut

tags: film, humor

115 likes

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#5

“Although the photographer and the art thief were close friends, neither had ever taken the other's picture.”
― George Carlin, Brain Droppings

tags: humor

35 likes

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#6

“I love books. I like that the moment you open one and sink into it you can escape from the world, into a story that's way more interesting that yours will ever be.”
― Elizabeth Scott, Bloom

tags: books

939 likes

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#7

“Did you see him? I know the photo was grainy, but he looks like one of those death metal goth heads, or whatever they鈥檙e called. All dressed in black with long hair

I took umbrage at my mother describing my boyfriend this way. John was the Lord of the Underworld. How else was he supposed to dress?”
― Meg Cabot, Underworld

48 likes

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#8

“Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.”
― Albert Einstein

tags: attributed-no-source, human-nature, humor, infinity, philosophy, science, stupidity, universe

147272 likes

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#9

“So many books, so little time.”
― Frank Zappa

tags: books, humor

149496 likes

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#10

“Never put off till tomorrow what may be done day after tomorrow just as well.”
― Mark Twain

34478 likes

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#11

“A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.”
― Steve Martin

tags: humor, obvious, simile

35228 likes

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#12

“The person, be it gentleman or lady, who has not pleasure in a good novel, must be intolerably stupid.”
― Jane Austen, Northanger Abbey

tags: aliteracy, books, classic, humor

51356 likes

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#13

“Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.”
― Groucho Marx, The Essential Groucho: Writings For By And About Groucho Marx

tags: animals, books, dogs, friends, humor

37943 likes

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#14

“I love deadlines. I love the whooshing noise they make as they go by.”
― Douglas Adams, The Salmon of Doubt: Hitchhiking the Galaxy One Last Time

tags: deadlines, humor, humour, work, writing

32097 likes

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#15

“Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and it may be necessary from time to time to give a stupid or misinformed beholder a black eye.”
― Jim Henson

tags: humor

26435 likes

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#16

“Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car.”
― Garrison Keillor

tags: humor, religion

30154 likes

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#17

“Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.”
― Robert A. Heinlein

tags: cats, humor, women

28752 likes

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#18

“I love mankind ... it's people I can't stand!!”
― Charles M. Schulz

tags: humor, mankind, people

18542 likes

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#18

“All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt.”
― Charles M. Schulz

tags: chocolate, food, humor

26790 likes

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#19

“I'm not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.”
― Woody Allen

tags: death, fear, humor, life

25622 likes

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#20

“I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.”
― Groucho Marx

tags: books, humor, reading, television

23111 likes

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#21

“The difference between genius and stupidity is: genius has its limits.”
― Alexandre Dumas-fils

tags: misattributed-to-einstein

21529 likes

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#22

“The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four people is suffering from a mental illness. Look at your 3 best friends. If they're ok, then it's you.”
― Rita Mae Brown

tags: humor, insanity

12691 likes

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#23

“I am free of all prejudice. I hate everyone equally. ”
― W.C. Fields

tags: humor, sinister

18710 likes

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#24

“Give a man a fire and he's warm for a day, but set fire to him and he's warm for the rest of his life.”
― Terry Pratchett, Jingo

tags: humor, proverb

12866 likes

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#25

“Some people never go crazy. What truly horrible lives they must lead.”
― Charles Bukowski

tags: humor

22433 likes

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#26

“Two wrongs don't make a right, but they make a good excuse.”
― Thomas Szasz

tags: humor, inspirational

9757 likes

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#27

“There's a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line.”
― Oscar Levant

tags: genius, humor, insanity

9902 likes

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#28

“Some humans would do anything to see if it was possible to do it. If you put a large switch in some cave somewhere, with a sign on it saying 'End-of-the-World Switch. PLEASE DO NOT TOUCH', the paint wouldn't even have time to dry.”
― Terry Pratchett, Thief of Time

tags: humor

10132 likes

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#29

“I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that I don't know the answer”
― Douglas Adams

tags: attributed-no-source, humor, misattributed-douglas-adams, wit

11361 likes

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relationships
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books
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universe
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