I'm a sucker for Buffy so the title alone on this one caught my eye, and I started without having read the blurb. Which would have told me I was in a I'm a sucker for Buffy so the title alone on this one caught my eye, and I started without having read the blurb. Which would have told me I was in a different ballpark...
A not bad but merely OK sort-of fairytale involving a dragon slaying princess, the prince who wants to marry her, and his stepmother who wants to hold on to the kingdom using a plot involving some mattresses and a pea to 'test' her purity. All of that's pretty much background, mind, as it turned out to be about some sex. Which itself was not bad but merely OK.
Merged review:
I'm a sucker for Buffy so the title alone on this one caught my eye, and I started without having read the blurb. Which would have told me I was in a different ballpark...
A not bad but merely OK sort-of fairytale involving a dragon slaying princess, the prince who wants to marry her, and his stepmother who wants to hold on to the kingdom using a plot involving some mattresses and a pea to 'test' her purity. All of that's pretty much background, mind, as it turned out to be about some sex. Which itself was not bad but merely OK....more
"Not last night but the night before, 24 robbers came knocking at my door. As I went out, they went in, and hit me on the head with a rolling pin"
Tha"Not last night but the night before, 24 robbers came knocking at my door. As I went out, they went in, and hit me on the head with a rolling pin"
That's the version we used to skip rope to when I was a kid, but thanks to Mr King it's even creepier now that it's the Tommyknockers coming to do an Invasion of the Bodysnatchers. That's right, instead of a supernatural threat this time it's aliens menacing a small town in Maine, and ticking two of my 'things that freak me out' boxes - body horror, and something taking over your mind...
Initially I struggled with this one, partly because of my own shaky state when beginning and partly due to just how drawn out Part One of the book is - essentially a two-hander taking us into the minds of old friends Bobbi and Gardener, as Bobbi stumbles over something on her land and feels the compulsion to dig. Either I got better around Part Two, or the book did, as we saw the wider effect Bobbi's discovery was having on the town.
With one of the effects of the Tommyknockers being a staggering array of gadget invention, King clearly had as much fun making these up as I did reading about them (even if some bits of this did threaten to make the book jump the shark at times - the killer Coke machine dragging me out of my nail-chewing reading and making me giggle stupidly instead, being one of these). I also found the self-references a little more jarring in this - while some of them worked within the context of the story they're starting to come a little thicker these days, and I found the IT reference in particular unnecessary, reminding me that I was in the act of 'reading' (instead of my usual feeling with King's books that I'm an invisible bystander in the town, unable to stop what's happening). However, King wins out by keeping things so deliciously creepy all the time that small niggles can't sink it.
A tale of 90's Brixton, starring Elfish - a spectacularly filthy (not just long unwashed, but prone to vomiting and urinating all over herself and stiA tale of 90's Brixton, starring Elfish - a spectacularly filthy (not just long unwashed, but prone to vomiting and urinating all over herself and still not washing or changing, and yet still able to find people willing to go down on her!), lying and manipulative, completely appalling person who has a dream: to stop her ex-boyfriend from claiming the name Queen Mab for his band by reciting the Queen Mab speech from Romeo & Juliet before his gig.
Bullying and deceiving whoever could help her on her way, it's odd to find yourself hating the main character as much as I did, and yet still enjoying the ride......more
A cheese-a-licious romance with a side helping of ham,Ìýthis was exactly the kind of shallow I was looking for to ease my tired and achy brain and, whiA cheese-a-licious romance with a side helping of ham,Ìýthis was exactly the kind of shallow I was looking for to ease my tired and achy brain and, while I can't bring myself to go any higher with my stars, it does get a bonus point for making me snigger so much.
Are you sitting comfortably? Then we'll begin....
(view spoiler)[Amy is a foundling working as a (priiiivate)Ìýdancer (a dancer for money) in the Pleasure Palace, a gentleman's club run by a mean former Queen of Madagascar (!) Madame Rafaramanjaka. Entering the club one night is one Edmund Hawkins, scoundrel and sailor, who gets bonked on the noggin while rescuing her from mysterious ruffians and promptly gets amnesia. Of course this means that Amy has to take him home with her, where she reveals she's a snot who thinks she's above her neighbours as well as wondering if "she wasn't making a mistake in letting the seaman reside with her." Snigger. Yes, I know I'm a child.
After a bit, Ed's tracked down by his brothers and promptly regains his memory, and it seems we've stumbled into a series as we're introduced to the Hawkins family. As well as Ed the scoundrel we have James the barbarian (who must have come first, as he's the only attached brother) Quincy the scamp (get used to this, you'll read it every time you read one of their names) and William the nondescript (poor bloke doesn't get a suffix. Must be waiting until his book...), all of whom were once secretly "the most infamous pirates to ever ravage the high seas" (snort) but now are gentlemen thanks to the marriage of their sister to a Duke. You following all this? Good..
Now Ed knows who he is, he decides to My Fair Lady Amy up a bit by taking her home with him and finding her a place as a lady's maid.ÌýFlirting heavily with Ed while nursing Quincy the scamp, who's also an opium addict (though he's not just a normal junkie. The poor tortured soul is actually easing his pain over his guilt over the death of his mother while delivering him, the sort of thing that can only be eased by finding your true love in a subsequent book) it turns out that not only is Amy the mostÌýinnocent exotic dancer to have ever lived, having not been so much as kissed before (what kind of prim 'Pleasure Palace' was Madame Rafaramanjaka running anyway?!) she also happens to be......dun, dun, dun! A lady. Yes, that's right - she didn't look down on her neighbours just because she's a snot, but because of blood. She's not just any old foundling but actually the daughter of a Duke and Duchess, kidnapped fifteen years ago.
Reunited with her family Amy soon finds out that, oh no! She's already betrothed! And to a Marquis no less, which is no consolation when all you want is (a) se(a)men. No worries though, as she finally gets her fill (snigger) - first thrashing around on some grass during a thunderstorm, and then in her mum and Dad's garden.Ìý
Thankfully, in case Amy was judged for being a ho, it turns out that the Marquis is a right bastard. Remember those mysterious ruffians from the beginning? You'll never guess who they were working for all along. Oh, OK! you will. Having thwarted her attempt to elope with Ed by having said ruffians bonk him on the noggin again, the Marquis tries to choke Amy to death on their wedding night in revenge for the death of the woman he loved, who killed herself after Amy's dad forced him into their engagement. But, phew! Ed turns up in the nick of time to save her and the Marquis slinks off. Just in time for his real wife to turn up and have the marriage annulled, thus freeing Lady Amy and Ed the scoundrel to live happily ever after. (hide spoiler)]
Like me, Harry's had a rough time of it lately. Unkempt, exhausted and prone to bawling like a baby (also like me at the moment), he's still restlesslLike me, Harry's had a rough time of it lately. Unkempt, exhausted and prone to bawling like a baby (also like me at the moment), he's still restlessly searching for a way to undo the changes wrought upon Susan in the last book. On top of this he's being held responsible for the war brewing between the Red Court of the vampires and the White Council, and people (and things) are trying to assassinate him every way he turns. So the last thing he needs is to get drawn into intrigue between the Winter and Summer Courts of the Faeries, but drawn in he is.
Losing the saintly but dull Michael and making way for allies such as Billy the werewolf and his alphas, and Toot-Toot and his tiny pizza-loving posse, this was as entertaining and intriguing as I've now come to expect. I even started to like Murphy this time around.
Another great entry, I'm looking forward to continuing my adventures with the series but will be putting off for a little while...my present mental state is having difficulty even facing the mild peril and stress faced by a fictional wizard so I'm off to even shallower climes for a while.
After The End of Mr Y and now this, I'm becoming rather a fan of Scarlett Thomas. Always intelligent and original, reading and enjoying her books alsoAfter The End of Mr Y and now this, I'm becoming rather a fan of Scarlett Thomas. Always intelligent and original, reading and enjoying her books also has the additional bonus of making me feel quite clever at the time and (rather like Meg, this one's main character) I understand concepts I go cross-eyed over normally, even if I'll be buggered if I can explain them afterwards.
Set in a part of the world I'm very familiar with (in fact I passed Slapton's tank just this Saturday) and filled with interesting characters that felt like exactly the sort of people who'd live in Dartmouth and Totnes, although sort of a storyless story (more of which inside the book, with narrative structure being a favourite subject of Meg's) this was still packed with story, and was a hugely satisfying read.
Taking in adultery, theories of the end of the universe, knitting, Beasts on Dartmoor, ships in bottles, the minutae of day to day life and the meaning of it all, this was very meta and very marvellous.
Do yourself a favour and pick up some Scarlett Thomas soon. ...more
Following Fool Moon with this, it seems Harry's gone from one breathless and desperate situation to another, as we move on from werewolves and onto ghFollowing Fool Moon with this, it seems Harry's gone from one breathless and desperate situation to another, as we move on from werewolves and onto ghosts and vampires. Poor fella must be knackered.
Taking familiar figures and once more giving different sets different traits (like the many species of werewolf in Fool Moon, the different vampire courts all have different powers and strengths), it makes for exciting reading as I can never quite guess how we're going to get to the ultimate smackdown. Character-wise I continue to enjoy Bob the most, and while I'm not full of affection for the 'Fist of God'-ly Michael I did enjoy Thomas as a counterpoint.
Thinking of Michael, I was a tad irritated at the way he was introduced as if we should know who he was - is there some side short that I needed to read? If so, that's annoying.
A 4.5 really, this was leagues ahead of the first book in the series, possibly by taking every flavour of werewolf (some of my favourite paranormals eA 4.5 really, this was leagues ahead of the first book in the series, possibly by taking every flavour of werewolf (some of my favourite paranormals ever) and flinging them all in. We've got loup-garou's, lycanthropes, hexenwolves and more...and it's awesome.
There's little to no downtime in Harry's world as instead we race from scene to scene and plot point to plot point, but I rather appreciated the lack of flabbiness (possibly because I've read some lesser books in the genre lately, which were mostly flab) even if I did miss seeing more of Bob the Skull (who works in a similar way to one of my faves - Bartimeaus - though not quite reaching his levels of snark).
Being in the middle of a high stress period, overworking and with not time for much reading, this also kept my attention perfectly in the short bursts of me-time I had, and I may continue in this vein while my employers see if they can make me get sectioned before Christmas....more
Lizzie is an uptight pre-school teacher â€� or at least, she is until the book opens when her life is turned upside down by the arrival of her Harle²Ñ±ð³óâ€�
Lizzie is an uptight pre-school teacher � or at least, she is until the book opens when her life is turned upside down by the arrival of her Harley riding biological Grandma, who happens to be a witch of the Red Skull coven and bears the news that Lizzie is actually supposed to be some 3rd generation demon slayer. Unleashing Lizzie’s powers for her, they then take off with Lizzie’s (now) talking dog, Pirate, in tow as a powerful demon apparently wants Lizzie’s soul.
While I was initially hopeful due to the slightly tongue-in-cheek approach, I soon found myself grinding my teeth instead. For one thing, I just can’t get behind a heroine whose favourite sayings include such gems as “Urgle�, “Ak�, “Crimeny� and “Sweet switch stars�. This is also the kind of book where most of the obstacles are down to shocking communication skills (no-one will tell anyone else anything they need to know, and then get mad that no-one knows what they’re supposed to), the only character the author really seems to have a handle on is the talking dog (the coven and the werewolves they come across are 2d caricatures, as is the obligatory sexy bad boy love interest who inexplicably falls for Lizzie for no real reason whatsoever other than that she needs a love interest) and the action scenes so poorly handled that they are nothing but a mass of confusion. I actually thought I’d missed a couple of pages towards the end during the ‘battle� and had to go back and re-read a couple of times. I hadn’t missed anything � it was just really poorly executed.
Apparently the first in a series, I’ll be giving the others a miss. ...more
A 3.5 really, this is what Macbeth might have been like had the three witches been Granny Weatherwax, Nanny Ogg and Magrat Garlick (the two latter beiA 3.5 really, this is what Macbeth might have been like had the three witches been Granny Weatherwax, Nanny Ogg and Magrat Garlick (the two latter being additions to Discworld that I wholeheartedly approve of).
Fun and undemanding with lots of lovely in-jokes, here's hoping I get more witches in my Discworld-reading future and less wizards......more
In which we learn my favourite character's first name, and I have conniptions when I think he's leaving us for good.
Artemis' father is now back, savedIn which we learn my favourite character's first name, and I have conniptions when I think he's leaving us for good.
Artemis' father is now back, saved by Captain Holly Short in the last book, and things are going to be changing. For one thing, Fowl Senior would like the family to go straight from now on, so Artemis is in a rush to finish one last job before his dad gets out of the hospital.
Unfortunately for our (anti) hero, the job goes wrong when the fairy technology he stole from the People is stolen from him in turn, and he'll need the help of a certain LEP Officer and a centaur tech-genius to get it back and save the People from discovery by people with even less scruples than he...
More excellent fun which acts brilliantly as brain sorbet (I'm reading a table-breaker of a book at the same time), and a lovely perk-me-up for when things started to bog me down....more
Seen through the life of Edevart, a simple, steadfast man from a small Norwegian village whose friendship with the roguish and nomadic August inspiresSeen through the life of Edevart, a simple, steadfast man from a small Norwegian village whose friendship with the roguish and nomadic August inspires in him the desire to lead a wandering life, Wayfarers is concerned with roots and restlessness, progress and its effects on humanity - big themes taken on through the minutiae of a life - and gently argues the case for a simpler, materially poor but more spiritually satisfying way of life.
Filled with lots of characters that all feel like real people - no black and white but a mass of short tempers, pride, generosity, deceit, love, arrogance and every other thing you could think of - it seems like not much is happening while absolutely loads is going on at the same time. Sometimes funny, sometimes infuriating, sometimes sad, it's a hard book to pin down and review!
While this sometimes also required patience to get through it (it's rather hefty after all) I was nonetheless still as interested in the goings on of agrarian Norway by the end as I was in the beginning, and if you're in the mood for something thoughtful, meandering and perceptive, you could do a lot worse than by taking this on.
A compelling novel of love and loss, guilt and forgiveness told in three parts: the first tells the events of an afternoon in 1935 from the perspectivA compelling novel of love and loss, guilt and forgiveness told in three parts: the first tells the events of an afternoon in 1935 from the perspectives of Briony, a precocious fledgling novelist of 13, her sister Cecelia and Robbie, the charlady's son. When Briony witnesses a moment of sexual tension between her sister and Robbie, her lack of adult comprehension and her passion for writing stories transforms the moment into one of evil intent on the part of Robbie and when her cousin Lola is later mysteriously attacked, Briony points the finger - the crime for which Briony is thereafter seeking atonement as Robbie is jailed and he and her sister torn apart.
The second part tells of Robbie, no longer in prison but still kept from Cecelia by World War II, as the British beat a hasty retreat from Dunkirk, as he tries to find his way back to her. Lastly, the third part sees Briony as she reaches her late teens and becomes a nurse, and then in her eighties as she tries to redress the wrongs she committed through a novel - the one we've been reading.
Clever, compelling and thought provoking, though a little too detached at times for me - I never really felt as emotionally engaged as I felt I should....more
A great introduction to what promises to be a fun series, this is a boisterous naval adventure set during the Napoleonic Wars in which our protagonistA great introduction to what promises to be a fun series, this is a boisterous naval adventure set during the Napoleonic Wars in which our protagonist Captain Jack Aubrey dashes up and down the Med in the sloop The Sophie taking 'prizes' (basically, being a pirate with his Madge's blessing), ranting about papists, playing violin, getting roaring drunk, yelling indecorous things at posh parties and cuckolding his betters.
Knowing absolutely nothing about sailing (other than it's done in boats, on water), none of the jargon meant anything to me (even when it was explained by one kindly character or other) rendering whole sections completely incomprehensible, and yet I still couldn't help finding it all wildly enjoyable. This was all down to the style employed (very much Jane Austen, for blokes) and the characters - particularly Jack and his BFF Dr Stephen Maturin who, despite the constant book obsession with denouncing buggery, gave me immense slashy fun. I also got a few unexpected prods back into the reality of things back then, via a crew made up of young boys and pressed men along with the odd officer, dodgy medical treatments and questionable hygiene (need to cut up your roast beef, Doctor? Just wipe off the scalpel you used to dissect a dolphin), and what it might have been like on deck of a boat engaged in a battle.
Good stuff, I imagine I'll be coming back for more soon....more
More like a 3.5, this provided welcome respite and much needed brain bleach after The Claiming of Sleeping Beauty as we enter the world of Anne ElliotMore like a 3.5, this provided welcome respite and much needed brain bleach after The Claiming of Sleeping Beauty as we enter the world of Anne Elliott, a more mature heroine than the usual in Austen, and the only member of the Elliott family that isn't immediately and completely awful. Having been persuaded by a family friend to relinquish an engagement to one Captain Wentworth years prior to the book, we join her at a time when he is about to be reintroduced, and the usual to-do ensues.
With the usual brilliant characterisation and eye for the less flattering ways people have of carrying on, this one did however lack any real tension for me. It's not that I was ever in any doubt as to whether or not previous heroines were to get their happy-ever-after, just that those priors got to interact with the object of their affections more which perhaps increased my enjoyment of their journeys to the resolution.
Still, it was nice to lose myself for an afternoon amongst a world of drawing rooms and being indisposed by rain, minor falls being treated as life-changing, death-inviting events, constantly visiting neighbours and fretting over rank and precedence....more
It's here, it's here! Having pre-ordered this for my Kindle, I felt a little like a kid at Christmas when I woke up this morning and found it sat therIt's here, it's here! Having pre-ordered this for my Kindle, I felt a little like a kid at Christmas when I woke up this morning and found it sat there, waiting for me. I'm a little bit excited about this. Possibly too much - I'm slightly worried that my stratospheric expectations will leave me disappointed, but Mr Abercrombie's not let me down yet.
Before we start, some thoughts. I'm sincerely hoping that all previous the talk of Logen having gone back to the mud was just that - talk. After all, we didn't see him die, did we? So there's a little chance that maybe, just maybe, we might bump into him again shortly...? Shall we find out? Aaiiee!!
Whew. However many pages, a few near panic attacks and some lumps in the throat later, and we're done. And we're sad about that.
Delivering some pretty hefty blows to faces both familiar and new as Shy South takes off on the trail of the men who burned her farm and stole her brother and sister, with her cowardly (heh) old step-father Lamb in tow, the Far Country proves to be very red indeed. And a touch Deadwood-y too (if you took out the more upright characters and replaced them with more swindlers, thieves, liars and psychopaths), as rumours of gold bring scores of people rushing to settle the land.
Always brilliant, often surprising, and forever making you question what outcome you could possibly hope or wish for, I wish I could read books as good as this forever. So hurry up and write another one, Joe!
A fascinating look at the rich and chequered history of Bedlam, as well as our changing attitudes and treatment of the mentally ill.
Abounding with manA fascinating look at the rich and chequered history of Bedlam, as well as our changing attitudes and treatment of the mentally ill.
Abounding with many facts and anecdotes about asylum life, I was astounded at the shocking cases of appalling treatment and the management of the asylums, both from the days when better off and bored visitors could trawl through the hospital, awash with drink, gawping at the poor maniacs in their chains for a fee, right up until its more modern incarnation.
Particulary interesting around the treatment and perceptions of women, we're now a far cry from the days when it was thought that our wombs travelled around our bodies causing hysteria, but not so far from the 'delightful' and deranged opinions of the Victorian men working in the fields of psychiatry. From Dr Edward Tilt, who:
"regarded menstruation as so dangerous that it should be retarded for as long as possible, with the aid of cold showers, meat-free diets and the wearing of drawers. He maintained that feather beds and novels, on the other hand, could only hasten sexual maturity."
and who:
"regarded menopausal women as pitiful creatures, and the idea of their partaking in sexual intercourse ridiculous and absurd. Husbands of menopausal women were advised to withhold their conjugal rights, and he recommended that any stirrings of desire should be treated with ice-cold douches, ice enemas and the aplication of leeches to the labia."
to the even more deranged Dr Isaac Baker Brown, who introducted clitorectomy as a cure for female insanity, and who was:
"convinced that madness was caused by masturbation and that by removing the clitoris he was saving women from a life of hysteria, spinal irritation, idiocy, mania and death."
If you pay any attention at all to the (mostly male) politicians currently spouting off on women's rights, it seems we've not come so far as we thought......more
Vonnegut's first book, and while he hasn't quite developed his voice yet this is still a great little satire on the politics of mass production, labouVonnegut's first book, and while he hasn't quite developed his voice yet this is still a great little satire on the politics of mass production, labour, radicalism and zealotry, as Doctor Paul Proteus finds himself knocked from his lofty position as Manager of Ilium Works and becoming the figurehead for a revolution....more
A decent true crime book following two detectives assigned to South Central over one summer in the mid-nineties and showing what an uphill battle bothA decent true crime book following two detectives assigned to South Central over one summer in the mid-nineties and showing what an uphill battle both they and the residents of South Central face in relation to the violence that affects the lives there. In an environment where a couple of homicides can occur an evening, in addition to the over-abundance of cases and mountains of paperwork the detectives are struggling through they also face scared witnesses refusing to cooperate, young people immersed in gang culture, strained relations between residents and the LAPD, and a media and wider population that seems happy to ignore the problems, as long as they’re confined to the ghetto.
Giving a face and voice to some of the forgotten victims and perpetrators of these crimes, I’d be interested to see how things have changed in the intervening years and, if they have, whether it’s for better or for worse� ...more
A strange stream of consciousness about squatting, pining for the lover that's left you, gods and goddesses, weightliftUmmm, well....that was strange.
A strange stream of consciousness about squatting, pining for the lover that's left you, gods and goddesses, weightlifting, werewolves, finding a drummer for your band, cactuses, hallucinations, and some other odds and sods.
Still recognisably Millar, but left me a little perplexed and more sad and melancholic than with the usual grin on my face. ...more
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