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This book was great in parts, disappointing in others. Nothing new, really, but lots of good reminders of what is helpful and what is self-defeating in dealing with toddlers. I think the biggest disappointment for me about the book is the authors' apparent attitude toward childcare. They seemed to be advocating a child being in a high-quality childcare center over being at home with the mother. At the very least, they presented them as equally good choices.

To me, this really discredits them. It seems obvious that if a child is with the same adult every day, all day, there will be a much great chance of achieving the consistency that is essential to good discipline. Not to mention the host of other benefits to the child, mother, marriage, and entire family when a mother is able to be home.

I know that it is not always possible for a mother to stay home, and I admire and applaud those mothers who put in a full day of work, and then come home and give all they have to their families all evening and all night. What women! But if a book is claiming to be interested in the welfare of the child, and the best ways to discipline, it seems an obvious error to think that there is no difference between a child being home with a mother or being in a child care. Can you tell this is a bit of a soap box for me? But really. Leaving all other issues aside, just consider two situations: one child is with his mother all day and receives her disciplinary style all day every day, while another child is at daycare most of the day and learns the disciplinary style there, and then goes home to a whole different style that he has to adjust to. How confusing! I have a friend who nannies, and she recently quit a job because of this very issue.

I have no problem with them including a chapter on child care, as they did. I think that's terrific! But I think it reflects either huge misunderstandings, or a desire to be more "modern" or whatever, for them to fail to make the point that it is most ideal, if possible, for a child to be home with the mother.

I'm sorry if I've offended or annoyed. This is just my ax to grind with these authors.