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Julia Ames is 57 when she runs into her one-time confidante, Helen Russo, at the grocery store. It’s been over 20 years since Julia sat in Helen’s house confiding in her about her struggles as a lonely stay-at-home mom to her young son, Ben. After Julia made a huge mistake that nearly cost her marriage to her devoted husband, Mark, Julia abruptly ended her friendship with Helen. Helen, now almost 80, briefly exchanges pleasantries with Julia before the two split ways. Julia leaves with both a longing for the friendship they once shared along with a sense of relief for the bullet she barely dodged as a troubled young mother when she was under Helen’s wing.

It’s difficult to write a review about a story I didn’t love with a protagonist I truly could not stand, but nonetheless found myself appreciate for other reasons. Claire Lombardo’s writing is authentic and her characters are well-fleshed out. Told through various timelines, the dynamics between Julia and Mark are complicated at best. While Mark is calm, patient, and loving, Julia is deeply cynical, often angry, and quick to find fault with every situation she’s thrust into. We eventually learn that Julia’s mother is an utter POS and that Julia has a history of neglect and abuse to work through. She aspires to be the kind of mother she never had, but her willingness to play a part in her own recovery is severely lacking.

Julia’s lack of growth grew tiresome and her relatability began and ended with her loneliness as a young stay-at-home mom with Ben. I found her treatment of Mark to veer more toward verbal abuse than occasional resentment throughout the story. I was sensitive to the abuse and neglect Julia suffered from her mother as a child and also as an adult (but why did she keep trying to bring her back in!?). And while we aren’t responsible for the people who hurt us, we are ultimately responsible for our own recovery and subsequent treatment of others.