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“I'm gonna be sick," I said
"I'm ordering you not to," says Obi.
"Ah, don't say that," says Dee-Dum. "She's a born rebel. She'll puke just to make a point.”
― Susan Ee, World After

“��"Was that your plan all along? Show me where to go, then convince me there's nothing I can do to save my sister?"

"Actually, my plan all along was to become a rockstar, travel the world collecting fan girls, and then getting really fat and spending the rest of my life playing video games while the girls kept comin', thinking I look good as I did in my music videos." He shrugs as if to say, 'who knew the world would turn out so different?”
― Susan Ee, Angelfall

“Oh, man," says Dum. "That would have been so awesome. Can you imagine? Boom!" He mimes a mushroom cloud. "Moo!"
Dee gives him a long-suffering look. "You´re such a child. You can´t just waste a nuke like that. You gotta figure out a way to control the trajectory so that when the bomb goes off, it shoots the radioactive cows into your enemies.”
― Susan Ee, World After

“He’s not just a mere mortal,�� says Dum. “Look at him. He’s probably got some super-strength badass juice in his pocket right now. One gulp and his muscles would have muscles.”
― Susan Ee, End of Days

“The next person who kicks or hits him gets banned from all betting. You will be blackballed for the rest of your shriveled lives. Now back off.��

Amazingly, they all back off.

Everyone else might reject the locust victims, but I guess the twins don’t discriminate in their betting pools.

Dee looks just as surprised as I am. He glances over at his brother. ‘Dude, we’re the new HBO.�� He flashes a grin.”
― Susan Ee, End of Days

“Hey, I saw your mom. Told her your sister was in the grove and that you’d be going there in a minute too.��

‘Thanks. Does she seem all right?��

‘She was pretty excited. Gave me a hug and a kiss,�� says Dum.

‘Really?�� I ask. ‘Do you know how long it’s been since she’s given me a hug and a kiss?��

‘Well, yeah, a lot of women find that they can’t resist my charms. They’re all over me for any excuse they can find.�� He takes a swig of pee-green Gatorade as if he thought that was sexy.”
― Susan Ee, End of Days

“So does anyone have a good survival strategy, or is there no hope for getting out of this nightmare?�� asks the Colonel.

‘We came up with a big, fat zero. I don’t know how we’re going to survive the blood hunt,�� says Dee.

‘That wasn’t the nightmare I was referring to,�� says the Colonel. ‘Death by stupid comments is what I was talking about.”
― Susan Ee, End of Days

“Tonight, we have the show of a lifetime for you. It is unfiltered, unmanaged, and certainly undeniably awesome!��

‘We take no responsibility for any of the bad things that might happen tonight,�� says Dum.

‘And take all the credit for the fabulous, fantastic, and fun-filled things that will definitely happen tonight,�� says Dee.”
― Susan Ee, End of Days

“What’s up with your hair?�� I ask. ‘Aren’t you worried you’ll be spotted by angels flying above with all that blue?��

‘War paint,�� says Dee, fastening his seatbelt.

‘Except it’s in our hair instead of on our faces,�� says Dum, starting the engine. ‘Because we’re original like that.��

‘Besides, are poisonous frogs worried about being spotted by birds?�� asks Dee. ‘Are poisonous snakes? They all have bright markings.��

‘You’re a poisonous frog now?�� I ask.

‘Ribbit.�� He turns and flicks out his tongue at me. It’s blue.

My eyes widen. ‘You dyed your tongue too?��

Dee smiles. ‘Nah. It’s just Gatorade.�� He lifts up a bottle half-full of blue liquid. ‘Gotcha.�� He winks.

‘“Hydrate or Die,�� man,�� says Dum as we turn onto El Camino Real.

‘That’s not Gatorade’s marketing,�� says Dee. ‘It’s for some other brand.��

‘Never thought I’d say this,�� says Dum, ‘but I actually miss ads. You know, like “Just Do It.�� I never realized how much of life’s good advice came from ads. What we really need now is for some industrious soul to put out a product and give us a really excellent saying to go with it. Like “Kill ’Em All and Let God Sort ’Em Out.”��

‘That’s not an advertising jingle,�� I say.

‘Only because it wasn’t good advice back in the day,�� says Dum. ‘Might be good advice now. Attach a product to it, and we could get rich.”
― Susan Ee, End of Days

“The feedback from the speakers changes and begins blasting death metal music so loudly into the sky that I swear the bridge suspensions are vibrating.

The twins were in charge of the music selection.

I catch sight of them on the side of the bridge, each with an arm raised, holding up their forefingers and pinkies in a devil sign, head-banging to the beat. They’re mouthing the words to the garbled voice screaming over the intense electric guitar and drums blasting out of the speakers. They might look pretty badass if it weren’t for their hobo clown outfits.

It’s the loudest party the Bay Area has ever heard.”
― Susan Ee, End of Days

“If any of you are injured, take a seat in this fine classroom.�� Dee opens up the nearest door and peeks in. It’s a classroom with a life-sized skeleton hanging on a stand. “Bones will keep you company while you wait for the doctor.”
― Susan Ee, World After

“What if I don’t want to go?��

“I like you, kid,�� he says. “You’re a rebel.�� He leans against the doorframe and nods his approval. “But to be honest, no one has the obligation to feed you, house you, protect you, be nice to you, treat you like a human being—��

“Okay, okay. I get it.”
― Susan Ee, World After

“I’m gonna be sick,�� I say.

“I’m ordering you not to,�� says Obi.

“Ah, don’t say that,�� says Dee-Dum. “She’s a born rebel. She’ll puke just to make a point.��

“You’re here for a reason, Penryn,�� says Obi. “And throwing up in my car is not part of it. Buck up, Soldier.��

“I’m not your soldier.��

“Not yet,�� says Obi with a wide grin. “Why don’t you fill us in on what happened at the aerie? Tell us everything you saw and heard, even if you think it won’t be helpful.��

“And if you have to get sick,�� says Dee-Dum, “shoot for Obi’s direction, not mine.”
― Susan Ee, World After

“He does a crazy zigzag maneuver before he straightens the car.

“A little forewarning would be nice,�� says Dee-Dum in a singsong voice.

“A little smoother driving would be nicer,�� I say mimicking his tone.”
― Susan Ee, World After

“Thank you, Clara,�� I say. “How did you get the key?��

“Dumb luck,�� she says. “Those twins with the funny names dropped it just a few feet away from me.��

“They�� dropped it?�� Those guys are the most skilled sleight-of-hand tricksters I’ve ever seen. Hard to imagine either of them dropping anything.

“Yeah, they were juggling a bunch of things between them as they walked. The key just fell and they didn’t notice.��

“But you did.��

��ٳܰ���.��

“How did you know it was the key to our police car?��

She lifts the key tag to show me. It’s a clear plastic holder that’s probably meant for pictures. This one frames a piece of paper with a note scrawled in little-kid block letters: “Penryn’s police car—Super Secret.��

If I ever see the twins again, it looks like I owe them a zombie-girl mud fight.”
― Susan Ee, World After