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“Everything good in life is either immoral, illegal or fattening.”
― Nicole Richie

“Fattening!�� said Troy, looking at Tabitha’s round face and plump arms.

“If I don’t mind being fat, I don’t see why other people should feel they’ve got to mind for me,�� Tabitha replied cheerfully. “And pies have got some food value �� they’ve got vitamins or something, haven’t they, Claire?”
― Margaret Mahy, The Haunting

“For starters, no more doing your own shopping anymore because you buy nothing but crap. Cereal bars and cookies and cream desserts and all that, finito. I don't know what time you get up in the morning but from Tuesday on you have to remember that I'm the one who's feeding you, okay? Every day at three when I come home, I'll bring you a meal. Don't worry, I know girls, I won't give you duck confit or tripe. I'll make a good yummy little dish just for you. Fish, grilled meat, tasty veggies- stuff you'll really like. I'll make small amounts but you've got to eat it all or else I'll stop. In the evening I won't be here to harass you, but no snacking or nibbling! I'll go on making a big pot of soup at the beginning of the week for Philou the way I always have, and that's it. The idea is to get you hooked on my food. So that every morning you'll get up wondering what's on the menu. I don't promise it'll be utterly amazing every single time, but it'll be good, you'll see. And when you start to fill out, I'll..."
"You'll what?"
"I'll eat you."
"Like the witch in Hansel and Gretel?"
"You bet! And no use giving me a bone when I go to feel your arm because I'm not blind!”
― Anna Gavalda, Hunting and Gathering