Ohhh, yes, my favorite: the poor white man who's so clueless about why women and POC hate his work.
[image]
It's like looking at WELL, ACTUALLY answerOhhh, yes, my favorite: the poor white man who's so clueless about why women and POC hate his work.
[image]
It's like looking at WELL, ACTUALLY answers on twitter and isn't it such a good feeling?? NOT.
I mean making fun of valid criticisms is so funny "(...) Have you ever thought of writing a female lead? (...) "Never" (...) "Why not?" (...) "Because I'm not a woman, and I don't want to offend them." "That's like saying you can't write diversity because you're white." One of my brows arched as I gave her a look. "Tell me, has anyone ever reviewed your reviews? Because, when a white guy writes women and diversity, everyone who wanted it from them says, not like that."
Hahahaha right, everyone knows that white men are criticized just because they're white men ...
[image]
... and not at all when their representation sucks big time.
Never mind, it's just that Å·±¦ÓéÀÖ reviewers suck, yknow Her brows drew together. "Well... no one has reviewed my reviews. Not exactly. But... I don't know if you've ever been to Goodbooks, but that place is a battlefield. (...)
[image]
... but the MC is special so that's okay, she's allowed to criticize "You weren't posting reviews with Liz Lemon eye-rolling GIFs just to get a rise out of people."
LMAO of course dude, of course.
[image]
I just... I'm not saying that reviewers are perfect and never fuck up but I find it really disheartening to see authors simplifying issues like this. It reeks a little too much of "marginalized reviewers are mean for no reason, hahahaha, I am ignorant on that matter but I'm sure their criticism isn't valid" for me to feel an ounce of sympathy for Mister I Write Terrible Male Leads and his Special Girl.
If you follow me, you might have noticed that my feed has been littered with a lot of romance novels lately. The reason why is pretty straight-forwardIf you follow me, you might have noticed that my feed has been littered with a lot of romance novels lately. The reason why is pretty straight-forward: when I’m tired or when my ADHD is acting up (let’s face it, it’s usually both), romance is my go-to genre. There’s just something so calming and smile-inducing in good romance novels, it’s like catnip when I’m running on three (okay, two) hours of sleep. Now what I want to know is how the fuck books like The Risk dare ruin my carefully-nurtured good mood. Seriously. How dare. To this day I still have a hard time figuring out why Elle Kennedy is so damn popular when her books are so fucking generic and boring that they make me want to put on headphones and sing
How come most US authors never bother to learn about the countries they're writing about? This devil-may-care attitude is so fucking exhausting and I How come most US authors never bother to learn about the countries they're writing about? This devil-may-care attitude is so fucking exhausting and I know for a fact that most US readers couldn't care less but... aren't you tired of being fed the bare minimum? Especially when the main conflict itself [medical bills] doesn't make any kind of sense in a Scotland context. Way to transfer a US issue into another country and thoroughly failing? In the end there's always this weird sentiment that other countries are somewhat similar to the US when... they're really not....more
"Because you can't be mine. You can never be mine. And if I fuck you, baby, you'll be mine forever."
[image]
That's.... That's not how dicks [image]
"Because you can't be mine. You can never be mine. And if I fuck you, baby, you'll be mine forever."
[image]
That's.... That's not how dicks work, sweety.
"You're not going anywhere without me, except work. And even there I'll be lurking in corners, watching, making sure nothing happens to you."
THAT'S NOT CREEPY AT ALLLLLLL
[image]
"[his dick] is a masterpiece. It deserves a painting, or at least a commemorative statue carved in marble, set out in a public square. If I wasn't so stricken by lust, I'd want to grab a pencil and paper and sketch it, that's how fantastic I think it is."
DUUUUUUUUUUUDE. WHAT. ARE YOU. DOING.
[image]
I could go on for a while, but I don't think I have the energy in me to copy/paste all the wonderful quotes this ~romance~ provided. For a freeby, it sure made me feel like I was losing a lot, first of all my sanity : intensely creepy, ridiculously nonsensical, I don't recommend INDEED....more
What I liked â—� Drew was surprisingly decent and kinda cute? Can I have a Fuck Yeah? â—� The sex scenes were pretty hot, I'll admit ; â—� The characte[image]
What I liked â—� Drew was surprisingly decent and kinda cute? Can I have a Fuck Yeah? â—� The sex scenes were pretty hot, I'll admit ; â—� The characters finally got some layers during the second half ; â—� Compared to most new adult novels, the writing was pretty good - not that it's saying much, because eh, there's a lot of crap out there.
What I didn't like â—� I'm just gonna warn you that the first 20% are filled with insta-love/lust of epic proportions - prepare yourself to roll your eyes something FIERCE ; â—� I've read too many romances to stand another Let's fight and break up for absolutely no reason drama feast - we didn't go into Anna's self-esteem issues in depth so it made it very hard to understand her attitude? â—� I'm sorry, but Iris and Anna were terrible friends in my opinion, and I never got the impression that they even cared about each other ; â—� There was a distinct Not Like Other Girls fuckery going on and I just can't stand that shit, okay? Anna did say that most women were awesome, though, hence why I didn't rage ; â—� I've said that the sex-scenes were hot but unfortunately they were also very repetitive and I might have stifled a yawn several times ; â—� This is probably on me and my propensity to read romance novels lately but the you are my home felt so cheesy to me, I couldn't help but laugh ; â—� The plot was really long-winded, so much that I had to check the percentages and frown on a hourly basis? â—� I'll probably forget the whole thing very soon ; â—� Actually I think I'll have a hard time to remember it tomorrow ; â—� What am I even talking about right now? Is that a book review?
â–� Bleh. Go on with your life, you're not missing anything without The Hook Up. Now I need to read great books because my average rating is a bitch.
... That's YA Mafia Romance for you, apparently?!?
I feel like my brain should be washed in bleach after Vendetta but as I'm a silly bitch who l[image]
... That's YA Mafia Romance for you, apparently?!?
I feel like my brain should be washed in bleach after Vendetta but as I'm a silly bitch who love rolling her eyes and giggling stupidly (apparently?!) I will most definitely read the rest, enjoy Luca and stab the puppy smile out of Nic the Creep's face. This book is trash, though, and does something I hate : it uses an attempted rape to serve the plot.
CONS : TSTL heroine - Instalove - Bad dialogues - Unbelievable - Predictable - NIC - The cheese, the cheese everywhere - these boys are just so beautiful, beautiful, beautiful BAHAHAHAHA (yes I'm losing it) - Remind me why they care about Sophie oh yes she's so spechul I'm drowning in snowflakes
PROS : girl friendship + LUCA (I like that he's not trying to be fed as a good guy like *cough*, and I'm very curious to see what he hides in him hehe - also he does try to tell Sophie to get lost which makes him way more decent than Nic The Creep) + Sometimes Sophie actually thinks and it makes my day + it's quite addictive, look at me, I should have DNFed on page 10 and I'm probably going to read the sequel XD
TW - Attempted rape, violence because it's the M A F I A (yeah I'm laughing don't shoot me)
2.5 stars. I'd have liked for Blake to be a little less... pushy and I'm not the biggest fan of endless discussions about some guy's dick (what), the 2.5 stars. I'd have liked for Blake to be a little less... pushy and I'm not the biggest fan of endless discussions about some guy's dick (what), the plot with her ex was... completely unbelievable but it did what I wanted it to do : made me laugh and smile. Shrugs. ...more
... Because in case you didn't know, Z is your sun, your light, your LIFE.
"By the end of that f[image]
Psst! Guys! You really have to meet ... [image]
... Because in case you didn't know, Z is your sun, your light, your LIFE.
"By the end of that first day without Z, the whole school fell into a general malaise. Students moved through the halls slower and didn't smile as much. Everyone looked doubly hard at Z's desk, as if staring could will him back. He was the sun, and his disappearance had sent us all out of orbit. And so, as the planet closest to him, I felt even more purposeless."
Who is Z, you're asking? Their guru? Their METH DEALER? What - naaaah, he's just that intriguing and oh so mysterious new guy *cough* every YA ever *cough* whom everyone loves because of REASONS.
I kid, I kid. There're reasons.
[image]
� He's got such an awesome sense of humor :
"Torture animals?" I should have known he'd joke around."
O_o
"Friday, as he set up the Bunsen burner, he said, "I wish I had a can of hair spray. I should have warned you that I'm kind of a pyromaniac. (...) He continued, "Tip : When you're with me, always scope out the nearest fire exit." (...) "You know that song? 'The Roof Is on Fire'? That's my favorite song. For obvious -"
Oh my God, I'm laughing so hard there. He's just so funny!
[image]
� He's just so intense, ya know?
"Oh, there is nothing as intense as the way he looks at you. When he does, it's like you've been touched, maybe not by the hand of God, but by one of God's fingers."
Blah, if that's the fingers then. Small player.
"I looked into his eyes as he repeated, again and again, that it was under control. You know I don't believe in witchcraft or hocus-pocus or junk like that [Twilight, though?] But in that moment, I knew that magic existed. Those eyes could make me believe anything. Anything. The world is flat? OK. Have a bridge for sale? Sign me up."
You, girl, have a problem.
[image]
� He's so respectful of other human beings and, you know, like, so fun to have around because he really cares, see what I mean?
"Instead, Z said, "I'm hungry. Let's get food." I didn't have to agree. It wasn't a question. He was just going to do it, and I suppose if I was against it, I'd have to jump out at a spotlight."
I know what you think - he didn't ask her but SEE! That's where you're wrong about him! He obviously did know before even asking her! How freaking AWESOME is that?!
[image]
� He's so interesting, people can't help but be affected. Because of course.
"Brainy Gerri never wore anything other than the school's regulation pink blouse, buttoned to the very top. Today though, her two top buttons were undone."
TODAY THOUGH.
"Some of the guys had taken to chewing gum."
That is MIND-BLOWING stuff there. I am in AWE of that guy, really.
Honestly? There's just something so appalling in seeing the main character fall head over heels for this imposture. Sure, from the *not so discreet* insinuations we understand that something bad is going to happen (sorry, this is YA thriller : something really really really bad is gonna happen - the badder kind of bad, like, so bad) but what baffles me is the fact that she fell (and the whole school with her) in the FIRST PLACE?! Like HOW? Alright, it tries to do something interesting by twisting the trope of the hot new guy (who is - shocking - actually a creepy dude, BOO!) but how can I feel invested if that's obvious from the start? I mean, Victoria's just so naive? O_o Also, she doesn't like other girls, so, you know, I don't like her. BIM!
DNF 18%. Aw, bummer. This is not going to work. How do I know that? Well. Let's see...
- Because everybody knows that football players are wiza[image]
DNF 18%. Aw, bummer. This is not going to work. How do I know that? Well. Let's see...
- Because everybody knows that football players are wizards : "... if it's just because he's talented, or because he has enough confidence to force the ball to behave the way he wanted."
Balls have intent and all that jazz.
- Because everybody knows that they are confused about their feelings : "His arms are buit up, especially, and I feel a weird sort of flush pass through me as I look at him. Dam, I've been here too long. I loaded up on carbs during breakfast, but after the intense workout, I'm starving again. That must what it is."
*DYING LAUGHING*
OF COURSE IT MUST BE THAT.
- Because they're selling dreams (no, really) : "Strong jaw, nicely square face, and a brow that's masculine but not reaching Neanderthal levels."
We wouldn't want that now would we.
- Because beer money is such a wonderful concept : "A few displeased groans and shouts come from the tables around us, and I see beer money change hands."
Woot! BEER MONEY!
- Because insta-something-something : "But the whole time, I can't help but watch my new mentor. Having one-on-one time with Jason Hawkins is either going to cure me of every mental hangup, or give me another one entirely : Him."
Nice. Dramatic much?
This is why I won't read further and be thankful that it was a freebee. Oh, well. Onto the next. ____________________________
First line :"Putting that blue and black jersey for the first time feels like coming home."
Okay we need to talk about that, because I'm seriously starting to think that you Americans have some secret shit hidden in your jackets.
Because. That line. Is. EVERYWHERE.
Okay now. I played sport for years - handball. Oh, right, I need to explain what that is. So this is basically the best sport EVER.
Because I said so.
Things go like that... [image]
And then you just fly (okay jump but hey who's counting) and look badass and BIM, goal. [image]
Just like that.
Anyway. I had a sweatshirt of my team because we do not have jackets in France (kidding, kidding, next thing I know it's the new stereotype about French after the not-shaving, eating frogs and snails - Ewww SERIOUSLY I mean we're PEOPLE).
So, I loved my sweat. There was my name on it and everything.
It didn't feel like home, though.
Also, I never wore it at school but then, it was yellow.
I am a redhead.
Fuckers.
Okay, what I really wanted to say is that I'm trying to forget that The Raven King is over. So, yeah.
There's telling, and then there's TELLING. There are repetitions, and then there are repetitions. Someone saves me from this terrible writing.
There's diversity, and then there are these white washed books where the only minorities are cashiers or fucking criminals.
"What the hell was that?" The suspect shook his head. "No Ingles." No problemo. Sawyer had some Spanish. He could say "give me a beer", "throw down your weapon, asshole," and lucky for this idiot, he could also recite the Miranda rights."
2.5 stars. Some books you instantly love - they reach you, unconditionally. Others you hate with passion and you would happily burn them if onl[image]
2.5 stars. Some books you instantly love - they reach you, unconditionally. Others you hate with passion and you would happily burn them if only you weren't reading ebooks (also, you really don't want to have something in common with every tyrant out there). Then they're the mild, non-committal threes and two-and-a-half, better known as the great shelf of meh.
â–� Well now. Do not be fooled by my 2.5 stars rating : I Am the Messenger is not one of those books.
Indeed this rating is to be taken as a chicken-hearted average to somehow express the utter confusion I've been feeling.
Here's the thing : While I cannot deny that some parts were pretty great, especially when it comes to the pacing (rather fast-paced, even though it took me 4 days to read it, which is a lot for me) and that I liked most of the writing -
- Oh, about that. Markus Zusak's writing often revolves around short sentences - now, I know that some readers don't like them, but I often find myself enjoying that kind of writing when done well. Yet it is a little too dramatic sometimes, I can't deny it. However, it sounded perfect to convey Ed's sarcasm and "woe-is-me" general attitude, and contributed to make the novel seem more action-packed...
Except. When it is. Written. In. Fragments.
(and let it be known that I enjoy Blake Crouch's writing, so it is not a peeve of mine usually)
... I was less than impressed with the constant undercurrent of sexism, didn't like the cop-out ending (I don't know if I expected too much, but it was a real letdown) (also, it has been done before) (I did roll my eyes) (oops) (but for fuck sake, cheesy much?) and developed an annoyance/love/hate relationship with Ed, the MC.
[image]
Ed, Ed, Ed...
++ Self-depreciating but oh so sarcastic voice : Ed is sure flawed and I wanted to smack him several times, but I still liked him.
"Taxi driver. Local loser. Cornerstone of mediocrity. Sexual midget. Pathetic card-player. And now weird-shit magnet on top of it. Admit it. It's not a bad list I'm building up."
See what I mean? Albeit unintentionally sometimes, I couldn't help but laugh.
- - I bitch, you bitch, he bitches : Can his friends really called friends? He seems to spend the whole book complaining about them. Well to be fair, he spends a huge amount of time bitching about himself too.
- - Some of his decisions didn't sit well with me : indeed something broke in me when he decided to wait before acting on the fucking rapist case. I'm not saying that I couldn't understand it but why not warn someone?? Why did Markus Zusak decide to make it okay for us to witness someone being raped countless times (not graphic, but we know it is happening) before moving along the plot? WHY? It made me sick. Also. The brothers? Well. Not impressed by his solution is the only thing I can say. Aw poor guys needed to bond over violence. I might shed a tear. Not.
- - - But my main complain is the fact that in my opinion the whole novel is incredibly sexist. I mean, did you see the female characters? Above that, did you freaking notice how Ed described them? Apart from Milla, the octogenarian, every female character is portrayed through her sexual behavior and her looks,(view spoiler)[even Ed's mother, in the end (hide spoiler)]. I will not bore you through the details (but silly bitch, really? REALLY?), but it bothered me very much. Not to mention Ed's weird obsession on women legs (no exaggeration) and the way he tries to convince us that Audrey must have sex with him. Why the fuck should she, really. Finally, am I the only one who found Sophie's parts incredibly disturbing? I know she's 15 and not 8, BUT the way Ed emphasizes on her very young age all the time got to me after a while and therefore I couldn't help but find his attraction a little gross.
[image]
Honestly, I would probably praise the originality of the plot if not for [image]
Many readers pointed that the message was beautiful and I don't want to be a spoil-fun, because it is, in some way, but why did Markus Zusak have to be so IN YOUR FACE about it? So glaringly obvious?
"Sometimes people are beautiful. Not in looks. Not in what they say. Just in what they are."
See this sentence? Nobody can disagree with that, and yet... I'm sorry, but it reads like a Nike advertisement.
â–� So much time spent pushing at open doors really. Disappointing read.
1.5 stars. All in all incredibly underwhelming and somewhat both idiotic and infuriating. Trust me, I would love to tell you that my distaste o[image]
1.5 stars. All in all incredibly underwhelming and somewhat both idiotic and infuriating. Trust me, I would love to tell you that my distaste only revolves around personal matters - as a strong case of "it's not the book but me", let's say - but in all honesty, I really don't think that and the problems I had with The Girl of Fire and Thorns were way too numerous to be left ignored.
"You must not lose faith, child. No matter what. Do not doubt God or his choosing of you. He knows infinitely more than we can imagine."
Many of my friends loved this book, and because I am naturally trustful (alright, maybe not), I kept reading when I wanted to DNF the hell out of it around 40%. Did it pay off? Huh, not really. Although the plot does pick up in the last 30%, the way events take place stays way too convenient and simple for my liking.
Not to mention that the writing was terrible, and by that I don't mean grammatical mistakes (there are none that I noticed) - No, I mean that everything was told to me and never ever shown.
[image]
True story : My favorite character is a 5 years-old boy whose appearance doesn't last more than 5 pages. Huh-oh, I may have a problem here. Truth be told, none of these characters were rage-inducing. Nah. They were too busy wandering around, bland and flat as fuck.
First of all, I'm not sure how Elisa avoided to be called on her Mary Sue status. Is it because she's fat and YA books tend to consider overweight as a synonym of ugly? The girl is God chosen, for crying out loud. Oh, she tells us that she's useless, but then she tells us so many things, I LOST COUNT. Really, though? She gives war advices that get everyone happy, does wonders with children - she even spreads martyr vibes at some point (but on that aspect she improves, woot!).
I didn't hate Elisa, because I didn't care enough to do so, but it doesn't mean that I liked the way her characterization was handled.
In my opinion, she conveys a disturbing and infuriating portray of overweight. Look, at first I was really happy to finally see a YA heroine who isn't strikingly beautiful, skinny, and white. So much wasted potential unfortunately. A book isn't body positive when the MC's growth is linked to her lost of weight and when fatness is only seen in a negative light (God forbid that a fat girl be beautiful - yes, there is a pun in there).
You gotta love pig metaphors, really.
"... as if I am a juicy pig roast garnished with pepper sauce"
Seriously. What's up with that? Did I miss a memo? Is it considered as normal and healthy that an overweight MC - one of the only ones I met in YA - constantly self-depreciates herself? Is repeating all over again that she isn't worthy and beautiful because she's not thin serves some purpose I somehow didn't grasp?
Does she ever realize that her weight - past and present - doesn't begin to define who she is? No, and really, how could she, when the plot never lets any room for that? I do realize that self-loathing can be linked to appearances, especially during the teenage years. I just wish that this important issue had been dealt with more complexity and depth, because as it is, I cannot condone it.
Then come the male-leads. Oh my GOSH what is it with these guys?
Who the fuck is Lord Hector? His entire characterization is built around the twisting of his moustache. I KID YOU NOT.
I won't bother talking about the weak husband(view spoiler)[ who doesn't care for telling people they're married and somehow keeps his mistress (who's thin and beautiful, of course). (hide spoiler)] Oh, oops, I just did.
Do not fear, though! Just wait and meet Humberto, the smiling, puppy-like desert man who never convinced me enough to care.
And do not get me started about these painted-faced enemies we know nothing about. As a rule, all the villains are plain EVIL, without any nuances. BO-RING.
More generally, I found two ways of dividing the whole set of characters : Way #1 : The Fat vs. The Beautiful Way #2 : Those who like Elisa vs. Those who don't like Elisa
This is the extend of characterization as far as I'm concerned, and I have yet to see some dynamics in there (at this point, I'm not even asking for chemistry).
[image]
Again, a fail. Let's talk about the religious stuff, okay? I saw many readers stating that it wasn't Christian at all (but then why not name the god something else, and why make it seem like a Bible parable, and why add some martyr vibes, I wonder), and I'm ready to acknowledge the fact that I have literally no patience for praying and sentences like "god knows all" in my books. Granted, it irks me something fierce in Fantasy, but let's not take my personal taste into account, okay?
Let's forget that I had to suffer from entire paragraphs like this :
"My soul glorifies God; let rejoice in my Savior For he has been mindful of his humble servant Blessed am I among generations For he lifted me from the dying world Yea, with his righteous right hand he lifted me He has redeemed his people, given them new life abundant My soul glorifies God; let it rejoice in my Savior."
(for full disclosure, I have to point that they're in church at this moment, and this is not the MC talking, but a priest)
Let's also not mention the constant praying, okay? It still bothers me very much. Why, you ask? Because it may be one of the LAZIEST magical system I've ever read about. What the fuck is this shit, really? So she prays and the God Gemstone in her belly-button helps her .... Sometimes?
REALLY?! RANDOM MUCH?! I can't believe how easy and idiotic it makes the plot. No explanation needed - because GOD. Pl-ease. Give me a break.
â–� Sigh. I could go on and on and on, it would remain that I'm in the almost non-existent minority on this one, and sad to be. In all honesty, I know that I can enjoy YA Fantasy, even tropey - I recently read and loved the Seven Realms series by Cinda Williams Chima. The Girl of Fire and Thorns doesn't compare anywhere near the still predictable The Demon King. And I'm not even talking about the awesomeness of The Lumatere Chronicles.
"He smiled and I smiled. It was sort of contagious."
That... is what contagiou[image]
â–� DNF. Because. This. Gives. Me. An. Headache.
THIS :
"He smiled and I smiled. It was sort of contagious."
That... is what contagious means.
"He laughed and it was real and true and I felt it absolutely everywhere."
NO SHIT. Please give specifics.
"He had been my moon. My stars. My everything when I had nothing at all."
*snorts* *feels like a cold-hearted bitch* *snorts again*
I'm sorry, but this is horribly written - it's formulaic, cheesy, eye-roll-worthy material.
"Karla was giving me the ubiquitous once over I was used to from other females. (...) [She] gave me a nasty look, which I returned blankly."
Oh, isn't that nice? A little girl hate action utterly uncalled for! (Also WTF at females really???!)
Also, THIS :
"What had I ever done to him to deserve this kind of reception? When had his love transformed into this?"
OMG! I know this one!! This, my girl, is what we call The Big Misunderstanding. Don't worry, you'll get over it, but you'll have to annoy the fuck out of me for 200 pages before you reach your Happily Ever After.
â–� Oh, fuck this. I can't do it. Please, do me a favor and remind me to stop trying this author, because she's definitely not for me.
1) You know what I don't find cute at all? When judgments are forced down my throat. This is manipu[image]
â–� Aww, that book was just so cute. Not.
1) You know what I don't find cute at all? When judgments are forced down my throat. This is manipulative and obnoxious. See, "perfect" Nate has a girlfriend, Sophie, but poor boy is misunderstood (boohoo) because she is not that fond of his dream to be a musician (he's graduating in music in NYU) and wants to have a part in his decisions. Not that I think that it's great to be in a relationship with someone who doesn't support your dreams, but boohoo, poor boy, if you're not happy, just break up already. Because you know what? The constant, heartless and pushing dismissal of Sophie pissed me off so bad. The strings are so fucking obvious - it's as if the author wrote bluntly : NATE, YOU SHOULD REALLY BREAK UP WITH SOPHIE TO BE WITH PERFECT DREAM PIXIE GIRL JORDAN. Sophie's unfairly portrayed - as a plain stereotype, cardboard people-like girlfriend.
Really, though? I felt bad for Sophie, even though I didn't like her (how could I, with the one-dimensional evil way she's portrayed?). I tried to put myself in her shoes, though, and the truth is, I would feel horrible if I was lectured by my boyfriend's roommate of 2 weeks about how I'm handling my relationship with my boyfriend of 3 years.
Just back off already.
2)Constant stereotypes are not so cute, you know. The fact that everybody in this book seem to think that people should be fucking copies to get along does not sit well with me either. So, what? Nate, as an artist, should be with an artist to be happy? I call bullshit on that. Life is not about finding clones who agree with everything we do. Life is about sharing things with people who care about us and for whom we care. Of course, Sophie, the future accountant, down-to-earth girl, is portrayed as a heartless bitch so as a reader I feel forced to go along with this but NO, this premise is idiotic and simplistic. I'm not buying that. Also, the artist private jokes with the dream pixie girl in front of your girlfriend the day she meets her? This is not cute, this is just rude.
How could I care about any of these characters when they're just plain stereotypes? Let's see, we have...
Jordan, the manic pixie dream girl : [image]
Nate, the misunderstood musician : [image]
Sophie, the Bitch : [image]
Nate's brothers, the players : [image]
Pearl... I don’t know... OH! [image]
... And also, Colin, Jordan's gay best friend who-can't-help-but-teasingly-hit-on-Nate (because reasons); Lol, we even have a gamer-computer-geek.
Not an ounce of depth really, and the plot is hardly believable.
3) Perhaps I'm just that bad, but these two PERFECT lovebirds who are so PERFECT together and who understand each other's so PERFECTLY are just so fucking boring, you know? This is cheesy, unrealistic, flat and I don't care. THERE. They don't feel like real people one second, and their fake quirkiness is giving me a headache.
Sorry, [image]
â–� By all means, do hook up together, I won't be there to see it. DNF at 69%, without even any kiss to show for it.
Buddy-read with the fabulous and *exceptionally frowning* Kat(click to read her review)
â–� All good things must come to an end, and thankfully a[image]
Buddy-read with the fabulous and *exceptionally frowning* Kat(click to read her review)
â–� All good things must come to an end, and thankfully all bad ones too. I should probably find the energy to review Booty Call properly, but I honestly don't feel like thinking about it one minute longer. As Kat said, we read it for shit and giggles, but this is so bad that it's not even funny.
"Ali," he growls. "My Ali. Mine. Fucking mine, always."
"Come with me." He's pissed, and I should be - I don't know, scared or something - but I'm not, because his hand grabs mine. His fingers wrap around mine. Scott's pulling me toward his car, and I'm probably grinning like an idiot."
â–� Oh, idiot. Get out of my sight already.
PS. Just so you know : using 36 times the word 'dirty' isn't going to convince me that the story is dirty.
So, I didn't like this book. Part of the reason of my dislike is solely my fault, because I'm French, and wouldn't, I think, bother a non-Frenc[image]
So, I didn't like this book. Part of the reason of my dislike is solely my fault, because I'm French, and wouldn't, I think, bother a non-French speaker. However, even without the oh-so-annoying experience of reading a book in which sentences are repeated twice - in French and in English - I must address the other issues I have with The Distance from A to Z, which are the slut-shaming, the unbearable and judgmental heroine and the boring plot.
Oh, and the way she "forgot" how to speak English when she was drunk? Bahahaha. There is no way you would forget how to speak your mother tongue because you're high. Just NO WAY that you'd magically start speaking another language you're not fluent in instead. What a joke, really.
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But what destroyed forever my interest is Ally, the MC. God, that girl. If there's something I really don't like, it's when we're obviously meant to like a female-lead and find her interesting when really, she's just an arrogant, slut-shamer, judgmental and needy asshole.
So, who's Ally? Ally is the kind of girl who puts people in categories, especially women, and thinks that she's above all of them (because she speaks French, which is so very hilarious to me). You're a woman? It's simple in Ally's world really : either you write poetry, you speak French or you wear small skirts. If the former, you're interesting and clever and NOT a slut. If the latter, you're most likely a vapid slut. Now tell me, because I'm confused : if I am French and wear short skirts, what am I? No REALLY. I'm just dying to know where I stand. GIRL?
Just meet her talking about a girl she doesn't know :
"Her smile is wide, her chin coming down almost to her shoulder as she plays shy. I'm sorry, but nobody whose behind is sticking that far out from their shorts, whose tank top is that low-cut, is shy."
Isn't she wonderful?
Granted, she develops a girl friendship with Alice, her roommate. I mean, okay, this is good. Yet I can't forget that the only reason she gives Alice the time of a day is because the girl writes poetry, and that EVERY OTHER GIRL is portrayed by the way she dresses or acts when Zeke, the love-interest, is present. Because if there's something that annoys me, it's when a girl is shamed for something that involves two people : see, these vapid, short-skirted girls (her words, obviously NOT mines) who dare to touch Zeke take all the blame, while Zeke obviously seeks their attention out. I mean sorry? Double-standard much? What the book is telling us is that these girls mean nothing, and actually they disappear from the story once Zeke starts dating Ally as if they weren't real persons. Alright, Ally does acknowledge that her thoughts are plain awful later in the book, but it was too little, too late in my opinion.
Ally doesn't stop her stereotypes at women, though. Men are also put in little boxes (whether they're athletes or artist), damn, WHOLE COUNTRIES are put in little boxes. Really, I feel like I should be flattered by the way she sees my country, but mostly I'm appalled and spent the book thinking, OH PLEASE DON'T. What? It's like we French are pompous assholes by association. Yikes. The way she analyzes people and traditions is so immature and condescending - I know that she's a teenager, and I would accept it if she wasn't so arrogant and meant to be cute. She isn't cute, but unbearable with her fake assumptions.
Also, when you ask people to NOT tell you something, I think it's pretty unfair to be upset when you discover that - shocking - there were things you didn't know. I mean for fuck sake! What did she expect?!
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Indeed it didn't help that I didn't feel anything towards their romance. If it wasn't rushed per se (because they spend most of the book separated), I still felt very annoyed by Ally's constant moping because Zeke-she-doesn't-like-because-he-is-an-athlete-spends-too-much-time-with-other-girls-(aka sluts). As Zeke never won me (because let's face it, if his only appeal comes from the fact that he speaks French, I'm not going to fall heads over heels over the guy), their Iloveyous let me completely cold (and rolling my eyes when they were blurted in French).
So, we have : 80% of the plot devoted to a romance I didn't care about. 50% of the sentences that actually learn me something, as the other 50% are only translations into French. 100% of the story related by a female-lead I pretty much hated.
Alienor � French Frowner �
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