I skipped some sections, like "Dream Genres," "Precognitive Dreaming" and "Dream Sharing," because they were addressing things I wasn't looking for, bI skipped some sections, like "Dream Genres," "Precognitive Dreaming" and "Dream Sharing," because they were addressing things I wasn't looking for, but explored the rest of Carr's suggestions and ideas. What has been most effective was coming up with a simple intention to start with and using an object as a memory prompt (I placed on top of my alarm clock and touching it while turning it off was a daily reminder of what I was trying to do- simply remember what I had just dreamt). The book is interactive so if you have crayons, markers and other art supplies at home you can make a lot of supplemental material while going through the practices.
There were things in the book I was familiar with, both as suggestions from other practices (sleep hygiene, tea) or things I had done on my own (dream mapping). I think there is probably one or two things that will stick with the average reader, which is a good thing. Carr has a lot of suggestions to try, so if you find what works for you that is a best case scenario. Take what is effective and keep using it. Or maybe wait a while, pull the book off the shelf a second time and do another 20 days? I'm sure it wouldn't hurt and you might get entirely different results....more
I wish I could remember where I heard about this book, but I'm glad I got around to it. There are a lot of insights into how a life full of screens haI wish I could remember where I heard about this book, but I'm glad I got around to it. There are a lot of insights into how a life full of screens has short-circuited our brains, which is something I've noticed over the past fifteen years.
I was the last person in my peer group to get a cell phone, so it was easier for me to notice moments where suddenly everyone was looking at something in their hand instead of talking to each other. I would be standing or sitting in a space looking around, unable to start or continue a conversation with anyone because they weren't present in the room anymore.
With each passing year it became worse, and I started noticing that when friends would come over to watch a movie they would be on their phones almost the entire time, scrolling through social media or texting instead of paying attention to whatever we were watching. Then I started experiencing conversations where someone would be talking to me, and when it was my turn to speak they would take out their phone and start scrolling through social media. If I stopped talking they would say something like, "Yah, I'm listening," then start talking about themselves or scrolling through their phone again.
It's no surprise that similar anecdotes like this pop up in the book, but the most interesting material is addressing why this is happening. Understanding that is a part of taking steps toward a solution, which will have to be a collective act if anything is going to change. We are at a precipice where these technologies are posing similar risks as the tobacco industry did during the 20th century. Without intervention, people are going to get sicker and sicker while blaming themselves for being too unmotivated to quit, but that is just a small part of a bigger picture. They are addicted to something engineered to keep them that way, and the companies behind these technologies are 100% aware of what they're doing.
What Hari suggests is that this problem has seeped into our environment and as a result entire systems have to change or we'll only become more dependent, addicted and ridden with anxiety. It's as simple as that. I can't say that his findings are mind-blowing or earth-shattering, but they're necessary. After all, the more informed you are the better your decisions will be, and this book is about decisions that affect everyone on a daily basis.
One of the things I've learned from my current job is asking the question "Is what you're doing now working?" in order to galvanize someone into thinking about solutions instead of becoming defensive. It goes without saying that what we're doing now isn't working like it should, and reading this book offers some solutions that can start at home but branch outward into your community or further. Of course the bigger fixes won't enter the picture without committing, making a fuss and a lot of hard work, but that is what it's going to take for a noticeable change.
As Hari puts it at the end, we can either put out a fire together or face the flames on our own. Ultimately it's up to us, but we've taken on much riskier issues before. Why should this fight be any different?...more
Helpful, but without a therapist or the group therapy you're only going to get so far. Still, I would recommend it to people who need something to helHelpful, but without a therapist or the group therapy you're only going to get so far. Still, I would recommend it to people who need something to help them journal and integrate whatever DBT skills they're working on....more
I considered buying this as a gift but decided that it might come off a gesture of pity instead of offering help. It never left my mind, though, and wI considered buying this as a gift but decided that it might come off a gesture of pity instead of offering help. It never left my mind, though, and when I encountered it on sale at my local bookstore I bought it for myself. Reading the suggestions for problems I've faced (as well as others I haven't) is enlightening and somewhat comforting. There is some really solid advice.
Honestly, this wouldn't be a bad addition for therapy wait rooms, school counseling offices or any workplace in general. I stash mine with my board games because it's pretty much a solitaire version of "heal thyself."...more
Whatever your opinion is on Brown, there is a lot of research and insights in here that could benefit anyone in these divided times.
On the other hand,Whatever your opinion is on Brown, there is a lot of research and insights in here that could benefit anyone in these divided times.
On the other hand, what I realized upon reading this is I have always been in the wilderness. Is there more to learn about why and how to cope with that? Undoubtedly. A lot of work to be done. At the very least, this book has given me some food for thought as I move forward....more
I have never felt so called out by a book in my life. It's all the more proof that in spite of the work I've done in the past there is still much moreI have never felt so called out by a book in my life. It's all the more proof that in spite of the work I've done in the past there is still much more to do....more
A friend of mine told me there was a passage in here that was worth looking into. While looking for it I ended up reading the whole thing. There's a lA friend of mine told me there was a passage in here that was worth looking into. While looking for it I ended up reading the whole thing. There's a lot of material in here that's useful, but I don't agree with everything Tolle has to say, which is probably for the better (completely adopting any ideology can lead to not thinking for yourself).
There were passages that seemed to suggest that emotions are a disease and remaining passive while others take advantage of you is a sign of enlightenment. I know I'm simplifying here, but those observations led to more questions instead of answers. Still, there are some interesting theories concerning human behavior and why so many of us struggle and remain unhappy. That is enough of a reason to check this out, because it might give you some insight and peace of mind. ...more
Just what someone needs during this kind of thing. It's not only a guide, but a place to memorialize memories and process what you're going through.Just what someone needs during this kind of thing. It's not only a guide, but a place to memorialize memories and process what you're going through....more
This was recommended to me and it took a while to get to it, but once I started I couldn't put it down. It isn't only illuminating regarding your relaThis was recommended to me and it took a while to get to it, but once I started I couldn't put it down. It isn't only illuminating regarding your relationship with a parent (or parents), but just about everyone else- siblings, co-workers, friends, etc. Once Gibson outlines the traits of emotional immaturity you can't unsee them, let alone ignore how it has established certain patterns in your life.
Fortunately, there is a lot of material to cover regarding the whys and hows of dealing with these issues. I'll probably end up reading this again. And most of all, I think this is an important tool for setting a new standard for yourself, not only regarding relationships with others but your own behavior....more
In spite of my rating, I would still recommend this book to people who are attempting to dream lucidly. It just didn't work for me, but did push me toIn spite of my rating, I would still recommend this book to people who are attempting to dream lucidly. It just didn't work for me, but did push me to realize there are barriers and safety locks on my subconscious. When I told one of my friends about this she was like, "So basically you're having Inception-level dreams about how you suck at dreaming?" I thought about it for a while then replied, "Yeah. Exactly."
I did the exercises for months and undertook the changes to make things happen, but instead I had results that were absolutely bizarre. I had lucid dreams within dreams about failing at lucid dreaming or becoming aware I was dreaming then being paralyzed and pulled away from whatever my intention might be. Another interesting development was when I had to track my dreams and come up with "dreamsigns" in order to help me become lucid. Once I started becoming aware of them they stopped showing up in my dreams altogether, including a troubling recurring scenario that has been bothering me for several years. This left me with little to nothing to hold on to or identify as "dream-like." Unlocking my subconscious turned out to be a guarded and constantly moving target.
Aside from the recommendations in this book I also tried meditations, several sleep apps and even a heavy dose of exposure therapy in order to push me into being more conscious when I slept. Nothing came of it, no matter how closely I followed the exercises or willed myself to let it happen. It might be because this point in my life is not the best time. Regardless, I'll keep trying.
I think gaining this ability can give you insight and help you resolve issues. If this book has the potential to help you, why not try it? Even though it's almost 30 years old it still has a lot of relevant information if you're starting out....more
I purchased this book for pretty personal reasons. The most I can say is that the subconscious can be complicated and impenetrable, so I hoped this boI purchased this book for pretty personal reasons. The most I can say is that the subconscious can be complicated and impenetrable, so I hoped this book would shed some light on how it works independently from what most of us call "waking life." In a way that's what Johnson is writing about, as well as suggestions and tools you can use to keep them in balance.
There are definitely some interesting ideas in here, but only time will tell whether they are the insight I needed. The book has heavy ties to myths and religion, as well as a hunger for "alternate lives" or having a multiplicity of personalities, which I didn't identify with as much. Still, there is a lot in this book that might make you rethink the way you dream and pay attention to where your thoughts are drifting throughout the day. Everyone could benefit from doing some inner work. Worth the read....more
This book specializes in emotional abuse and neglect, so its insights are very particular and relate to specific kinds of experiences and thought pattThis book specializes in emotional abuse and neglect, so its insights are very particular and relate to specific kinds of experiences and thought patterns. If you suffer from C-PTSD that is related to war, torture, violence or sexual assault, you won't find as much material that speaks to your experience.
There are tools and insights in here that can be helpful for anyone struggling with this disorder. I just didn't see as much addressing my experience or struggles as I had been hoping for. Still, this wasn't a complete loss. I often thought about other people struggling with particular symptoms and sent excerpts and toolboxes from the book to help them out.
If you're like me, I would recommend jumping back and forth to the chapters and excerpts that might apply to your symptoms and concerns. The table of contents is very specific and will guide you toward insights that might help. Still, keep in mind this is a book for survivors of dysfunctional families and less of a comprehensive take on trauma....more
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