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** spoiler alert ** She f*cked a bear.

She literally f*cked a bear.

No. This isn't some euphemism for a beefy gay man.

She motherf*cking literally f*cked a literal bear.

What. The. Hell.

Okay. So. I'm not a cultured reader. I read mostly YA and...well...that's about it. BUT, I am a reader. A layman reader. So, here is the review from a casual just-for-fun reader:

She f*cked a bear.

For the record: did I pick up this book knowing there will be bear-f*ckery? No.

I picked it because I wanted (for once) to read a novel. I wanted one of those fancy English-students-read-this sort of novels.

I found this 120ish page book on the "suggested reads" table of my local library. Here's the blurb from the back:

Marian Engel, one of Canada's most celebrated and provocative novelest, died...The short and controversal novel "Bear," her last and best-known work...

It sounded good - it had all the hallmarks for cultured reading, right? It won prizes, it's by a treasured national author, it was controversial. I was pumped - watch out world, I'm gonna get cultured.

The book started off okay. It's a bit pretentious but it was manageable. There's an isolated, island house donated to a historical society and it's filled with old books.

For once, instead of Sunday school attendance certificates, old emigration documents, envelopes of unidentified farmer's Sunday photographs and withered love letters, something of read value had been left to them.

A librarian (Lou) is sent there for the summer to categorize and catalog the collection. There's an old bear chained up that was the family pet that our Lou needs to care for.

At this point, the book wasn't too bad. It wasn't particularly gripping but hey. Not bad. Then we get to the "First Look":

As she sat down, she realized the bear was standing in his doorway staring at her.

Bear. There. Staring.

She stared back.

Again, not bad. She starts to befriend the bear, bringing him food, petting his fur, giving him anthropomorphic characteristics....essentially all the things that even a five year old knows NOT to do with a wild animal.

At one point Lou walks the bear on his chain to the island's edge and as the bear swims, she jumps in naked.

Yes, it was a bit odd - it was odd that she thinks of the bear with so many human emotions, that she goes skinny-dipping with him, that she notices his very "male-ness" when she first meets him....but I maintain that at this point, there wasn't any indication that things were going to go so far south.

I remember thinking, "Oh jeez. That's those fancy-novels. Free spirits. Wouldn't it be funny if..."

Turns out, that was not funny.

To summarize the rest of the book: (And note, I'm summarizing this in the blandest way possible but I'm still putting it as a spoiler - so you have been warned):

(view spoiler)[

She lets the bear start to roam her house. He visits her at night. She initiates, luring him to certain areas of her body with sweet smells.

There are many couplings (oral). She goes on long walks (dates?) with the bear.

There's menstruation involved at one of their "couplings." It was a huge turn-on for the bear.

She tries to initiate further via stimulation and guiding him...but learns that there's mechanical differences between the two species.

(hide spoiler)]

To use one of the side character's words:

"People get funny when they're too much alone."

Did the side character know? Did anyone find out? What was the plot?

Honestly, from pg 80 on I skipped every page that involved genitalia and stimulation thus reading maybe 20 of the 40 remaining pages. It was just too much.

I didn't get the plot but I am not going back for it.

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