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RE-READ: April 5, 2020: Me re-reading this like:



















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I wasn’t about to waste my life away, upset, because I was raised by people who couldn’t commit to anything in their lives. All they did was show me the kind of person I didn’t want to be.

Now this, this is the slow-burn romance I crave.

After two years, Vanessa has had enough of Aiden “The Wall of Winnipeg�� Graves. For a while now, she’s thought about quitting her job. She knows it isn’t the best idea. After all, she knows how many people would give to have her job - being an assistant/housekeeper for the best defensive in the NFO isn’t an easy job to find. But as much as this job is helping her, she can’t continue putting her dreams of graphic design and starting her own business behind. So when she tells her boss, Aiden, that she is quitting, she at least expected him to feel bad, to ask why or give some sort of feeling, but after seeing nothing, Vanessa knows she’s making the right decision.

And so she leaves.

After a couple of weeks pass by, Vanessa feels relieved, but then Aiden unexpectedly shows up at her apartment door asking for her to come back. As much as he asks (more or so, demands), Vanessa continues rejecting. That is until Aiden gives an offer: if she marries him, he’ll pay off her student loans and buy her a house.

The reason for why Aiden is asking Vanessa to marry him is because Aiden is Canadian and his visa is set to expire the year after. The thing is, Aiden doesn’t want to go back to Canada, and in order to become a resident in time, he needs to marry a U.S. Citizen, and Vanessa seems to be the best option.

It’s an offer Vanessa knows she can’t reject. Her student loans are putting so much weight on her shoulders, and paying them off by being in fake marriage with one of the current best football stars wouldn’t be that bad, would it?

If you had told 15 and 16 year-old me that I would finally read a Mariana Zapata book in 2020, I honestly wouldn't have believed you. Her books always intimidated me, simply because they're contemporary adult romance that are more than 500 pages. Honestly speaking, I dread books longer than 400 pages. But here I am now, and I couldn't have been happier.

Let's start with Aiden. When Vanessa Mazur said that Aiden wanted a dog before a family, I knew I was sold. Aiden Graves is described as cocky, arrogant, stubborn, and overall, rude, and while he is all that, I couldn’t help but love him. As a matter of fact, I didn't mind the cockiness, arrogance, stubbornness, or even the rudeness. I think the biggest reason for this was because he was actually never directly mean to Vanessa, per se. While he never told her a thank you, please, or even wished her a happy birthday, there was never that toxicity that is common in adult romance reads, and that’s the stuff I live for. I never found Aiden, surprisingly, being mean for no particular reason. Say, he never called Vanessa rude names, or never brought up unnecessary past to make her feel bad, or, was generally, a bully.

Aiden was clearly lonely. He had no friends. He didn’t know what it was like to have a friend, not until Vanessa became more than just his assistant. He was emotionless, expressionless, cold and serious, showing no sign of pity or remorse, which was why many, including Vanessa, found him to be arrogant and rude. But the way he tries to become Vanessa’s friend after realizing he messed up warmed my heart and actually, not even kidding, had me squealing.

“I know you think I wouldn’t care,�� he said in that whisper voice that bled solemnness, “but I would. I do. We’re in this together.��

He was so adorably awkward with Vanessa, even if it wasn't directly stated. Even though the entire book is told through Vanessa in first person, I'm sure it's easy to imagine how difficult it might have felt for Aiden to become friendlier, more social, and happier around Vanessa. His slow development took a while for him to get used to, but little by little, he started doing and noticing the smallest things in order to become that friend he said he would try to be with Vanessa, and it was nothing but adorable. He was, truly, a softie.

“I can be your friend. I can try,�� he said in a low, earnest voice. “Friends take a lot of time and effort, but…�� Aiden looked up at me again with a sigh, “I can do it. If that’s what you want.��

Yeah sex may be great, but when Aiden and Vanessa were in Las Vegas and Vanessa decided to walk around Las Vegas at night, alone, Aiden decided to wake up from his nap and walk with her because he was worried, even if he didn’t admit it?

“Maybe you’re used to doing things by yourself, but don’t be an idiot.�� He started off calmly, totally in control. “I didn’t know where you were. There’s crime here—don’t give me that face. I know there’s crime everywhere. We might not be doing this for the reasons most people do, but I made a vow, Van. And I promised you we would try to be friends. Friends don’t let friends wander around alone.�� He pinned me with a glare. “You aren’t the only one who takes their promises seriously.��

Or when he decided to run with her as she trains for her marathon because he was worried, again, since it was getting dark soon, even though he was breaking some of the rules he put on himself?

Or when he didn't hesitate to think about beating Ricky up after seeing her bruised wrists?

Or when they both got stuck in an elevator and he held her on his lap as he tries his best to comfort her and learns about her phobia of the dark, comforting her so she doesn’t panic as she did before?

I was in Aiden’s lap. He was cross-legged on either side of me, each of his muscular thighs cocooning my hips, his chin just behind my ear. I shivered.
Behind me, Aiden straightened; under my butt, his thighs tightened and strained. It was then that I felt embarrassed. “I’m sorry,�� I apologized, already lifting up to lunge off him.
“Shut up,�� he said as his hands landed on my bare knees, shoving me back down onto him; my back hit the solid wall of his chest and it was right then I realized his shirt was soggy from the rain. I didn’t care. Under me, his legs relaxed, my bottom settling on top of his feet.
[...]
The big guy hummed into the shell of my ear, his breath warm and way too comforting. “You want to tell me what that was about?�� he asked in a whisper.

Or when the lights of the house went out so Aiden immediately went to go check up on Vanessa and decided to sleep with her in order for him to, again, comfort her?

“Aiden?�� I whispered.
“Hmm?�� he murmured.
“Thank you for coming in here with me.��
“Uh-huh.�� That big body adjusted itself just slightly before he let out a long, deep exhale.

Or when Aiden started naming off the things he knew about Vanessa, the small details he’s noticed of her, such as her favorite things or what she does when she’s annoyed?

Or when he beat up Christian and realized that he, in fact, really cared about her?

“I’ve let you down too many times. I won’t do it again.��

Or when he gave her a proper wedding ring for Christmas with her birthstone?

Or when he flew four hours to go to Canada just to see her at the book convention she was at and read a romance novel?

Or when he immediately texted her updates after he arrived in Colorado?

Or when he surprised her at her marathon?

“I missed you.��
“You what?��
His arms tightened around me. “I missed you very much.��

Now that is sexy.

I don’t know man, but small things like that have me screaming by how wholesome it is. My heart is just wrapped in a heart shaped warm blanket during those moments.

The Wall of Winnipeg and Me delivered more than I could ask for. While the relationship is slow burn, the story itself is not slow whatsoever. Zapata managed to make her 500+ page book a page turner, simply because there was always something happening, whether it was related to the football games, Van and Aiden, their friends, Van’s family, or generally, anything else, and for the majority of the time, it was a ride I’d want to experience again. I somehow managed to read 100 pages in one sitting, and before I knew it, I was halfway done.

While I fell in love with Aiden, I also really adored Vanessa’s character. I appreciated the history Mariana added about both characters, and explaining it as the two were getting to know each other really made the experience better. I found Vanessa to be strong and patient, but also vulnerable and sad. While she annoyed me at times, such as how she tried having a relationship with her mother, I still accepted her bravery for walking away and not letting herself go through her trauma again. Vanessa had also gone through a lot, and I couldn't do anything but sympathize with her, especially as she explained what she went through with her sisters.

The Vanessa who was fifteen and older had felt a different emotion for so long: anger. Anger at my mom’s selfishness. Anger at her for not being able to clean her act up until years after we’d been taken away from her. Anger for being let down for so long, time and time again.

I am a fan of romance developing in a mediocre pace, not too slow and not too fast, but the time between Vanessa and Aiden was perfect. Their banter had me wanting to highlight it all. Full of humor and sarcasm, the two took a while to like each other, but as the reader, it's easy to feel the tension between the two and how their marriage of convenience slowly becomes something much more real, much more emotional. And when Aiden kissed her for the first time? Yeah, I couldn't have asked for better timing.

The Wall of Winnipeg stared down at the much smaller man, and in a voice that was as close to a cool, unattached statement as possible, he said, “Touch my wife again, and I’ll break every bone in your goddamn body.��

The first non-YA romance I read was Listen to Me in June 2016, when I was 15, and Mariana Zapata was one of the first authors I heard about after, but I never got around reading her books. While I am not the biggest fan of smut and steamy reads, I do read it once in a while, but I can't complain that this had none of that smutty action. It's all towards the end, barely even there, and I couldn't be upset about it. I wanted nothing but that yearning between the two characters. Their chemistry was stronger when they were falling for each other. Don't get me wrong, the sex was still there just like any NA book, but even if it wasn't there, I would have loved this regardless. Give me that sexual tension that you can cut with a knife, physical touch, and care shown through actions and words instead of sex and we'll be good.

“It’s a long story.��
“I have time for you.��
It’s a really long story,�� I insisted.
“O�첹��.��

In conclusion, The Wall of Winnipeg and Me delivered more than I wanted, and it's gotten my standards of slow-burn and enemies-to-lovers high.

So yeah, if you like very slow-burn romance, sexual tension, (almost) no sex, relationships between the boss and the assistant, tough on the outside but soft on the inside heroes, confident heroines, and golden retriever puppies, then you will (hopefully) like The Wall of Winnipeg and Me.

Maybe that was the thing about love I never understood before Aiden. Like football and art, like anything that anyone in the world has ever wanted, love was a dream. And just like a dream, there were no assurances behind it. It didn’t grow on its own. It didn’t blossom without food to feed it.