欧宝娱乐

I鈥檓 not sure if it鈥檚 a talent or an affliction, but I鈥檝e been blessed or cursed with a penchant for taking someone else鈥檚 creative work and extrapolating it to skewed extremes. That explains my yet-to-be-published collection of fan fiction, unauthorized sequels, and twists in perspective. I first discovered this talent/affliction as a boy when I imagined a fourth little pig who leveraged himself to the hilt, built a luxury skyscraper, and, with YUGE block letters at its base, labelled it Pig Tower. The Big Bad Wolf, as a professional courtesy (and quite possibly with the promise of kickbacks), agreed to a huff and puff waiver.

As a teen I wrote a follow-up to Kurt Vonnegut鈥檚 classic that I called Slaughterhouse-Six. It was set in a mirror image world where war was devastating the planet Tralfamadore. Fortunately, the protagonist, Libby Mirglip, survived the bombs and lived a varied if not full life after the conflict. She was aided by alien visitors from planet Earth who showed her, through their own less enlightened example, what not to do.

I鈥檇 prefer not to go into the details of one my more recent works, Fifty-two Shades of Grey. If it鈥檚 ever published, it鈥檒l be under an assumed name, or maybe names 鈥� I鈥檓 toying with the idea of S. and M. John. BTW, I saw that some other joker stole my basic idea and technically beat me to the preferred number fifty-one.

This brings us to my latest, Catch-23. Since I鈥檝e already done an absurdist post-war account of tragedy/comedy with Slaughterhouse-Six, I wanted to steer clear of such a heavy/humorous theme this time. Instead, Catch-23 is the story of a local seafood restaurant on 23 S. Washington St. in Naperton, Illinois. They became famous for their Shrimp Yossarian. Then a new executive chef upped the number of times customers would fly through the doors by offering Skate Wing Schnitzel a la Scheisskopf, Major Major Mahi Mahi, and Stuffed Oysters Orr-style. Naperton鈥檚 whore gave the story some much needed spice. (As with any fan fiction, references will only be appreciated by those who know the original.)

Oh, and hey, there is a catch here. Against your better judgment, you continued reading each ridiculous example in this exercise of 鈥渙ne more." Making it this far means you鈥檝e read 鈥渙ne more鈥� paragraph all the way to the end. The catch is that you must be crazy enough to perceive this as a payoff.