ŷ������

4.75 —im not being generous or threatened by lulu�� stars. changing my rating cuz im a girouette

“ I’ll do better. I’ll try harder for you.��

Before diving into this story you need to understand that this is not your average contemporary romance, you need to keep in mind that the protagonist’s flaws and addiction problems aren’t here to serve or embellish the romance by sorting out the blemished parts of the characters and with that providing a satisfying ending. I think what made me love this book so much is the fact I knew what I was getting myself into and that helped for not getting irritated or angry at some a lot of the protagonist’s actions. With that said shall we start the review.

“Lily, what do you mean about not being good people?��

“We’re selfish and miserable.��

Debauchery, depravity might be harsh to describe what Lo and Lily’s life was like since teenage-hood but crudely honest. In the story, the two of them had been friends for most of their lives —their fathers were mogul-best-friends�� but after high-school they decided to go into an unhealthy spiral by hiding each other’s addiction from their families and starting a fake-relationship. Lo was dealing with alcoholism since his 11 year old and Lily was taming a sex addiction that bloomed at her 13 year old. After three long years of lying to their wealthy-families —accessory to each other, too�� they finally thought; why don’t we try and be in a real relationship together, after all?

“I realized I wasn’t just another promiscuous girl in school. I didn’t just have sex for fun or because it made me feel empowered. I liked the high, the rush, and how it seemed to fill an emptiness that kept growing inside of me.��

Lily was a paradoxical character but lovable, nonetheless. The contrast between her shy and reserved personality but brazen love for sex —in all its aspects�� was an interesting part of the storyline. Were her actions morally okay ? No. Did she treat well her family and Lo, in general? Also no.
But how are you supposed to judge a character -Lily- agissements when they are clearly the reflection of her dependency ? She was lost and driven by her corrupted thoughts that don’t forget flourished at a very young age, this would mess up with anyone mind. She didn’t get the help she needed because her family had given her the impression that she couldn’t fully or at all be honest with them and confessing was under the table because to them a good and proper image was more important then a mental health. And that goes for Lo, as well.

��

I know I can be a royal asshole. But I love you. You’re my best friend, and the only person I’ve ever told that I have a problem. It doesn’t matter if we’re in a fucking fake relationship. We’re supposed to talk to each other. Come to me before you go off the deep end, okay?��

Lo, how can a personnage be portrayed as selflessly egotistical? Still wondering. The way his life was orbiting only around alcohol and Lily was heartbreaking. He had gone through so much and the fact that what happened in the last chapters had given him the strength to fight for him, against his addiction and for Lily was so beautifully heart-wrenching. He didn’t want to lament about his dysfunctional family or his noxious relationship with his father, anymore. His character was the perfect caricature of how parents can wreck the lives of their children.

"You’re a permanent fixture in my life. You’re not going anywhere."

Lo and Lily’s relationship was the epitome of toxic. The moment Lo had given Lily a pass; assuring her if she ever cheated on him it was okay, because he knew at some point she couldn’t help herself. I was a goner for them and their deficient bond.

Disclaimer: Cheating is forbidden for my taste in romance, AND IN GENERAL. It’s clearly the worse thing that ever happened to humanity. religiously that’s how humanity was created but whatever. no one jumps on my throat, please.

But him being so understanding and yet knowing it would break his heart just because he loved her beyond what her addiction meant for them and how in a way was restraining their relationship for years was one of the most beautiful, selfless act of love.

“You two are so weird,�� Connor says, very casually.��

The addition of Connor and Ryke in the last half of the book brought some life and entertainment into the mixe with Connor’s pragmatic humor and Ryke obstinacy to help Lo. The family drama that literally exploded at the end was ten time more ravaging then what I predicted. I honestly can’t wait to devour the rest of the series.

some quotes:

"He kisses my forehead before I can form thoughts, and when he pulls away, his lips brush my ear. “I’m here for you. Always "

"“Lo?�� I whisper.
�Ԩ�𲹳�?��
“Please…don’t move, okay? »
“I won’t”He wraps his arms around me, keeping me warm on the cold tile."

"We may not be good for each other, but sometimes I feel like he’s the only guy who could ever love me."

"Then let me try,�� he says, his hand cupping my face. “Let me try to be enough for you."

"I’ve never pretended, Lil. We’ve been together, even if you thought it was some fucking lie."

"We’re terrible at so many things—remembering important dates, college, making friends—but the one thing we’ve always been halfway decent at is being together. We owe it to ourselves to try."

"Sometimes the cannots turn into maybes which become okays."

"I’ll always be yours. No distance or time apart will change that, Lily. You need to believe that."

—�Ĕ�Ĕ�Ĕ�Ĕ�Ĕ�Ĕ�Ĕ�Ĕ�Ĕ�Ĕ�Ĕ�Ĕ�Ĕ�Ĕ�Ĕ�Ĕ�Ĕ�Ĕ�Ĕ���
Idk if it’s a smart or really dumb move trying to cure my reading slump with this series, but anyway it’s too late.🥲