欧宝娱乐

This book will stay with me for quite some time and I really wish it didn't. This has, for some reason, messed with my head so much that I literally have flashbacks to scenes from this book and it's genuinely causing me distress.
My main issue is, what is this book supposed to teach us? Some scenes have actual merit, there is talk about white women vs black women as influencers and "life coaches", general talk about misogyny and sexism, about how even in #metoo times sexual violence has to fit into the right categories to be considered real, that women in the public eye have to be perfect, always, and will not be forgiven the same way a man will be for the same mistakes, the duality of being a famous person but distinctly lacking meaningful relationships is addressed, there is even something to be said about the depiction of mental illness (at first). And then the book just screws us all over.
For me, it basically ruined all the good parts by the way the MC deteriorated in the second half of the book. I didn't want to be part of this spiral into utter and absolute desolation and chaos, I really didn't want to be. Especially not in the head of this insanely unreliable narrator. Many parts of this were so cringey I really don't know how I made it through. This is supposed to be an adult woman losing her shit, but she reads like a thirteen year old. It wasn't fun, believe me.
Ultimately, to me, this does a huge disservice to everyone who has ever been the victim of sexual violence. Our MC has suffered through sexual violence, but since she lied about how it happened, it will only be used against her. The best friend, who has come forward with her allegations and is obviously not well, literally only suffers for trying to speak her truth and will continue to do so now that the truth is finally out in the world. So really, there is no way to win. Isn't that just the uplifting message you want to send to people dealing with sexual violence? Obviously it isn't. So why send it?
I also found the fact that both of these women are adamant in their insistence that they're straight deeply insulting. The synopsis frames the sexual assault as the MCs "sexual awakening" (which is just really utter and complete bullshit). This led me to believe this would be a book about a lesbian MC and possibly closeted best friend dealing with these allegations, but this is genuinely one of the straightest books I've ever read. Literally no one is being homophobic and yet the MC and the best friend act like being into men is the only way to live. Maybe this could have been used to talk about the sexual violence happening in same sex relationships that isn't ever really addressed (not that it's addressed a lot in straight relationships, but you get what I mean), but once again O'Neill decided not to do anything of merit.
The unreliability of the MC also quickly ruined any and all meaningful discussions about mental illness and trauma, because you don't know if anything is real. Everything is presented through this lense of contempt and bullshit to build tension that O'Neill obviously didn't know how else to build, to then falls entirely flat in the last reveal. Because the thing is, you already know. Once you understand how the unreliability generally works, you know exactly what will be revealed. The only things that stay murky are the parts about the MC's trauma and mental illness, which obviously really took from her character development. Her obvious and violent struggles with her mental illnesses are used for shock value and to make her an abuser who doesn't know she is one. I just don't think that's very respectful or has any merit as a plot point.
The only time I laughed reading this was when the MC is send to talk to the woman accusing her of sexual assault by her agent, because that is so unrealistically stupid that it genuinely made me laugh out loud.
Overall though this book really tries to be woke to instead fall into all the harmful tropes and ultimately not say anything important.

Hopefully I will not be having any more flashbacks to this book now that I've written this review. I really can't put into words just how uncomfortable many, many moments made me without any payoff whatsoever. I genuinely wish I hadn't read this.