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What a read!! I am BLOWN AWAY 🌬��

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~ One last summer book squeezed in, and this book definitely had those end of August vibes…and I think at this point it’s safe to say I am obsessed with reading Irish books; I just feel a much deeper connection with the writing style than I do in any other book ~

I have SO much to say about this book, but in a few words: ABSOLUTELY FANTASTIC DEBUT!

I was totally blown away by this book and have so many feelings, it’s taken me a bit of processing to come to terms with everything that happened, especially in the last few chapters…it is also an incredibly difficult book to review without giving away the whole plot!

This was such an insightful and cleverly written book. It is a true testament to the author Chloe Howarth and she, without a doubt, deserves all the praise she has had since this book was published in June last year. She writes like the words just flow off her pen like water down a stream. She is magic ✍��

One key element that really stood out to me in this book were the FANTASTIC array of metaphors used. I don’t think I have ever read such pure and true depictions of such a multitude of situations and emotions.

This book is solely based on the POV of 17 year old Lucy who…’Recently, I have really wanted to figure out who I am. There must be more to me than being Martin Burke’s best friend or one of the girls or the Nolans�� daughter. I’m just not sure what that is.�� She is somewhat of an outsider from ‘the girls�� and is fearful of rejection. She is the one that sits on the outside observing, which she clearly doesn’t mind; ‘It’s nice to watch them, and hear them, and feel I am one of them.�� But, the story really begins when she starts to WANT MORE��

The ‘problem�� Lucy has is that the conventional path that all those in this small Irish town follow doesn’t appeal to her. Living in Crossmore and the attitudes this rural village holds are KEY to the understanding of her constant battle. She doesn’t want to follow a path of marriage and motherhood. Furthermore, boys, both even her longstanding best friend Martin, don’t appeal to her. Instead she spends…‘A year wasted on watching her. The long light of March is so welcome, I must clean myself in it, I must move on from this. Am I wrong to notice all the things that set her apart from the rest of us? She is better, nicer, prettier, just miles ahead. There’s no trespass, it’s just a year of watching, and observing, and waiting for the next thing that will make me crumble. There are times when it becomes so much that I can’t stand to be around her. But there is something in her attitude that I am drawn to.��

She is totally entranced beyond her own imagination. The passion and power of her first love is indescribable, yet somewhat infectious. There is also a longstanding internal dialogue running throughout the course of the book which I found to be a fascinating insight into Lucy’s true and raw thoughts and emotions. And the language Chloe uses is absolutely beautiful and descriptions that are so crystal clear.

Overtime, as Lucy and Susannah develop their relationship. She seems to develop a double life. In one sense she is completely overwhelmed by her life with Susannah…‘It started a few weeks ago in her garden, a few innocent hours of sunbathing, which has mutated into me offering her every free minute that I have��. However, she is torn because…‘Right now it seems as though I only have two options: either I can be who Mother expects me to be, or I can be whoever I want to be. Each seems as treacherous as the other.��

As the years slowly pass by, Lucy is torn between two people and two possible future lives…which will she choose and will it work out in her favour? Only time will tell��

‘To be with her is a sin, to be without her is a tragedy��

Overall, I thoroughly enjoyed this story. It is a deep portrayal of love and was actually really sad in parts; I really felt for Lucy and was saddened by the fact she felt that she couldn’t be her true self. I also really appreciated the format of letters Chloe chose to use, especially more and more as the pace gathered towards the end of the book. It definitely helped to build up suspense and I was DYING to know how their lives turned out. I hadn’t released until this point how invested I had become in these characters.

And finally, I will leave you with one last beautiful quote:
‘There is no guilt, no fear. I don’t care if anybody sees me here, looking for the love of my life. I want to be seen here. I want the world to see me with her. I want them all to see me setting myself free.��

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