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Reading How to Be Enough is like having a therapy session with your wisest, most compassionate friend—the one who calls you out and hands you a donut afterward. Dr. Ellen Hendriksen gets it. She knows what it’s like to aim for the moon, only to spiral into a shame galaxy when you miss. (Spoiler: The moon is fine without us, and perfectionism is a rocket to nowhere.)

The book offers seven "shifts," but don’t worry, they’re not the kind of shifts that require new yoga pants or a personal transformation playlist. These are practical and grounded adjustments for turning down the volume on your inner critic without accidentally letting them run the company holiday party.

Highlights include Hendriksen’s knack for mixing science with storytelling. She makes you laugh while explaining why your brain insists on comparing your blooper reel to someone else’s highlight reel.

Where the book shines is in its balance—Hendriksen doesn’t want you to abandon ambition or stop being excellent. She just wants you to stop emotionally bludgeoning yourself for not being Taylor Swift, Martha Stewart, and Oprah combined. The “inner rulebook� exercise? Both cathartic and slightly terrifying when you realize your rules sound like they were written by a supervillain HR department.

Well, some of the exercises made me want to schedule a nap instead of a self-compassion session (progress?). And at times, Hendriksen’s examples leaned a bit too therapist-y for my taste, but hey, she is a therapist, so fair play.

In the end, How to Be Enough is a life raft for anyone drowning in perfectionism and self-criticism. It’s not about lowering your standards—it’s about redirecting them toward things that actually matter. I’ll still strive for excellence, but now, I’m also striving for� I don’t know, maybe a little joy?