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emma's Reviews > Twilight
Twilight (The Twilight Saga, #1)
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by
emma's review
bookshelves: eh, 3-stars, ya, fantasy, magical-realist-urban-whatever, reviewed
May 07, 2020
bookshelves: eh, 3-stars, ya, fantasy, magical-realist-urban-whatever, reviewed
Read 2 times. Last read May 7, 2020.
TWILIGHT DRINKING GAME!
Take a sip every time:
- Edward smiles crookedly
- Bella trips on something
- A random guy is jealous of another random guy Bella is talking to
- Edward has a wicked glint in his eye
- Bella says she's not hungry
Take a shot every time:
- You wonder whether this town is suffering from a women-only pandemic or general shortage of women just because at least that would explain the low-grade tsunami of high school students constantly flooding Bella’s proverbial DMs
- Edward refers to Bella, the person he is lusting after so intently that his boners are setting off earthquake detectors, as a child
- There’s that relatable moment when your crush is like “hey I’m probably going to kill you :(� and you’re like “omg that’s so sad for you to have to deal with that�
Realizing I typed “drinking game� above when I meant to say “way to get alcohol poisoning within 20 pages.� Autocorrect!
The good news is that you don’t even have to be zonked beyond human comprehension to have fun with this book.
It just...is fun.
Even as it’s problematic.
Even as it’s poorly written.
Even as it’s kind of unoriginal, and not well-characterized, and generally lacking in all those areas that tend to make books “good.�
This is simply never not fun.
I wish I could lie and say it's unpleasant. I wish I could pretend to be better than this book and unsusceptible to its charm and genuinely exist at superhuman levels of judgment and clarity and coolness, as per usual.
But I am honest above all and this is a fun read. Sorry! Take it up with the Bad Book Justice System.
Bottom line: I’m not proud!
----------------
pre-review
is this book good? no, it's not.
is it well-written? no.
is it unproblematic? not even slightly.
but goddamn if it isn't fun.
review to come / 3 stars
----------------
currently-reading updates
SO pleased to announce that i will be revisiting one of the great works of literature of our time.
that's right.
i'm rereading the Twilight series.
and i wonder why i suffer.
Take a sip every time:
- Edward smiles crookedly
- Bella trips on something
- A random guy is jealous of another random guy Bella is talking to
- Edward has a wicked glint in his eye
- Bella says she's not hungry
Take a shot every time:
- You wonder whether this town is suffering from a women-only pandemic or general shortage of women just because at least that would explain the low-grade tsunami of high school students constantly flooding Bella’s proverbial DMs
- Edward refers to Bella, the person he is lusting after so intently that his boners are setting off earthquake detectors, as a child
- There’s that relatable moment when your crush is like “hey I’m probably going to kill you :(� and you’re like “omg that’s so sad for you to have to deal with that�
Realizing I typed “drinking game� above when I meant to say “way to get alcohol poisoning within 20 pages.� Autocorrect!
The good news is that you don’t even have to be zonked beyond human comprehension to have fun with this book.
It just...is fun.
Even as it’s problematic.
Even as it’s poorly written.
Even as it’s kind of unoriginal, and not well-characterized, and generally lacking in all those areas that tend to make books “good.�
This is simply never not fun.
I wish I could lie and say it's unpleasant. I wish I could pretend to be better than this book and unsusceptible to its charm and genuinely exist at superhuman levels of judgment and clarity and coolness, as per usual.
But I am honest above all and this is a fun read. Sorry! Take it up with the Bad Book Justice System.
Bottom line: I’m not proud!
----------------
pre-review
is this book good? no, it's not.
is it well-written? no.
is it unproblematic? not even slightly.
but goddamn if it isn't fun.
review to come / 3 stars
----------------
currently-reading updates
SO pleased to announce that i will be revisiting one of the great works of literature of our time.
that's right.
i'm rereading the Twilight series.
1911 likes · Like
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Reading Progress
Started Reading
October 29, 2011
–
Finished Reading
July 7, 2014
– Shelved
May 7, 2020
–
Started Reading
May 7, 2020
–
Finished Reading
Comments Showing 1-50 of 150 (150 new)
I reread it last year and wondered the same thing. Twilight is still kind of enjoyable after all, but the other books are a HOT MESS. I'll be waiting for your reviews holding a bucket of popcorn :D
I wanted to finish, cuz I’ve only read half the series but can’t find where I put them :(
Best review I've ever read😂😂
I’ve been considering re-reading. I loved them when they came out. Not sure what my thoughts will be this many years later.
I loved them the first time I read them because I was 12 and highly in love with Justin Bieber. Not sure what I'll think now.
Baneen121 wrote: "I will start rereading these too. Don't know why, I just want to.CAN'T HELP IT"
GIVE IN
Annie � wrote: "I reread it last year and wondered the same thing. Twilight is still kind of enjoyable after all, but the other books are a HOT MESS. I'll be waiting for your reviews holding a bucket of popcorn :D"i am having a blast
Amber wrote: "I wanted to finish, cuz I’ve only read half the series but can’t find where I put them :("i have no idea where my copies are, i borrowed an ebook
Divya8720 wrote: "Best review I've ever read😂😂"i'm blushing
Barbara wrote: "I’ve been considering re-reading. I loved them when they came out. Not sure what my thoughts will be this many years later."do it!!!
heba wrote: "I loved them the first time I read them because I was 12 and highly in love with Justin Bieber. Not sure what I'll think now."wow soul sister...same
I reread them a while back. It took me a few years to actually complete the reread. The first book was actually enjoyable enough. I remember flying through it. The rest of the series took a nosedive and it's a miracle I finished. I vaguely recall talking about a twilight drinking game myself. I'm sure a lot of people have. My reread was my first time reading the bree tanner book and if the entire series had been that short, it would have been better. Or at least more filled with lore. Elaboration on the back stories. Something. Anything but the story itself.
Given that midnight sun is finally being published, I plan on rereading Twilight in honor of my 12 year old self; she'd be so excited to finally finish the book (I read the leaked version l o l). I don't know if I'll survive it, so I can't wait for your full review to see how you fared.
This review was much more enjoyable than the actual book :D I'm actually considering re-reading the series to have fun when the new book comes out but I'm afraid to suffering)
Rea wrote: "I reread them a while back. It took me a few years to actually complete the reread. The first book was actually enjoyable enough. I remember flying through it. The rest of the series took a nosediv..."i've always found the first one mildly enjoyable but the second one i recall as being one of my least favorite books ever, even at the time. so this does not bode well
Laura wrote: "Given that midnight sun is finally being published, I plan on rereading Twilight in honor of my 12 year old self; she'd be so excited to finally finish the book (I read the leaked version l o l). I..."this one is easy pickins! it's the next book where the going gets tough
Tamara wrote: "This review was much more enjoyable than the actual book :D I'm actually considering re-reading the series to have fun when the new book comes out but I'm afraid to suffering)"rereading this one couldn't hurt!
lol The world right now: "That series was awful. Just a horrible influence. All of those characters. All of them. (finishes preordering Midnight Sun)"
Tyler wrote: "lol The world right now: "That series was awful. Just a horrible influence. All of those characters. All of them. (finishes preordering Midnight Sun)""tyler...you have once again described me to a T
Yeeess! Let the rereading and drinking game commence! *jumps up and down*
A.M. wrote: "Yeeess! Let the rereading and drinking game commence! *jumps up and down*"YESSSSSS
My favourite Twilight review of all time! 🤣🤣🤣
Swaye wrote: "My favourite Twilight review of all time! 🤣🤣🤣"high praise!!!
Aditi wrote: "omg this is golden"much appreciated
A part of me will always remember that Edward Cullen was my second crush ever !! * Facepalm* ( I was so loyal to Harry till then )
This is the most amusing review for Twilight to ever reach the land of mortals 😂 💕
I remember being charmed by this series when it came out. Didn't understand the backlash that followed. Too many people took a vampire love story waaaaay too seriously.
Haritha wrote: "A part of me will always remember that Edward Cullen was my second crush ever !! * Facepalm* ( I was so loyal to Harry till then )"
who among us did not have a crush on edward cullen!
Gabrielle wrote: "This is the most amusing review for Twilight to ever reach the land of mortals 😂 💕"i will wear this badge of honor
Sara wrote: "I remember being charmed by this series when it came out. Didn't understand the backlash that followed. Too many people took a vampire love story waaaaay too seriously."there are definitely problems with it, won't lie, and it's not for me to say whether those problems are ignorable or not, but i can't say this isn't a fun read
AH best review of Twilight ever written 😂
Most entertaining review I've read in awhile 😂 I would contribute to your drinking game taking a shot every time Stephanie Meyer uses the word "whisper" in this series. Still fun as a guilty pleasure read.
Oh God I love this book even though it's so problematic :'-D I made a guilty pleasure shelf just for this book.
To be honest while I never Twilight and only seen the movies I do have to agree with Lindsay Ellis that a lot of the hate was overblown and while there are problematic elements within the book that do warrant discussion it is far from the worst book ever.
take a sip everytime you see some form of the word "deliberate" oh it will happen way before 20 pages
Lmaoo this is the best review I’ve ever read
or maybe its just that i have to have downed 5 bottles of yeni raki to enjoy it
heLLLOOOO Twilight. Wow. if this book isn't a whirlwind of emotions i don't know what is. or maybe it's the exact opposite and it doesn't convey any emotions at all. i can't tell.
let me just start by saying that Edward's toxicity in this book is HORRIBLE. he is horrible. he acts like he is bellas dad, and then throughout the story gets even worse.
BUT i will not lie when I say that I love this book. I'm sorry. I really do. and I wish that I didn't because i know it's dreadful but it's such a horrible read that it's actually good. stephanie meyer is a GENIUS. a genius i tell you.
Basically this series is the reason why I'm in love with Robby so thank you for that as well Stephanie. <3 xoxo
exactly!! its so dumb its funny i had a blast reading it lol
you could get alcohol poisoning if you took a shot every time a character 'grimmest"...
Probably would be dead from alcohol poisoning and how people have enjoyed this book despite so much toxicity and yes the endless lusting after a clueless white girl who shames other girls - definitely dead. But good on you that you found it funny at least, Emma. This can’t be worse than the after series.
I used to like this book however I could never reread it !
How to get yourself drunk in five minutes or less ...
Alex (The Scribe Owl) wrote: "AH best review of Twilight ever written 😂"<3
Kat wrote: "Most entertaining review I've read in awhile 😂 I would contribute to your drinking game taking a shot every time Stephanie Meyer uses the word "whisper" in this series. Still fun as a guilty pleasu..."not the whisper!!!
The Smol Moth wrote: "Oh God I love this book even though it's so problematic :'-D I made a guilty pleasure shelf just for this book."most of the time i'm like "no such thing as guilty pleasure, just pleasure!" but this...this is guilt
Knight wrote: "To be honest while I never Twilight and only seen the movies I do have to agree with Lindsay Ellis that a lot of the hate was overblown and while there are problematic elements within the book that..."i really feel that the impact on native americans is not for me to dismiss, and i also feel that the glamorizing of a fairly abusive relationship probably had a serious negative impact as well, and simultaneously this book is enjoyable to read! the latter doesn't change either of the former
Bethany wrote: "take a sip everytime you see some form of the word "deliberate" oh it will happen way before 20 pages"DELIBERATE OH
CAN'T HELP IT