Å·±¦ÓéÀÖ

“The Buried Bishop’s a gridlocked scrum, an all-you-can-eat of youth: ‘Stephen Hawking and the Dalai Lama, right; they posit a unified truthâ€�; short denim skirts, Gap and Next shirts, Kurt Cobain cardigans, black Levi’s; ‘Did you see that oversexed pig by the loos, undressing me with his eyes?â€�; that song by the Pogues and Kirsty MacColl booms in my diaphragm and knees; ‘Like, my only charity shop bargains were headlice, scabies, and fleasâ€�; a fug of hairspray, sweat and Lynx, Chanel No. 5, and smoke; well-tended teeth with zero fillings, revealed by the so-so joke â€� ‘Have you heard the news about Schrodinger’s Cat? It died today; wait â€� it didn’t, did, didn’t, did…â€�; high-volume discourse on who’s the best Bond â€� Sartre, Bart Simpson, Barthes’s myths; ‘Make mine a doubleâ€�; George Michael’s stubble; ‘Like, music expired with the Smithsâ€�; and futures all starry; fetal think-tankers, judges, and bankers…power and money, like Pooh Bear and honey, stick fast â€� I don’t knock it, it’s me; and speaking of loins, ‘Has anyone told you you look like Demi Moore from Ghost?â€�; roses are red and violets are blue, I’ve a surplus of butter and Ness is warm toast.”
― David Mitchell

“Me: “This is obviously a clog. How about I take it apart and check the internal tubing?â€� NASA: (after five hours of deliberation) “No. You’ll fuck it up and die.â€� So I took it apart.”
― Andy Weir, The Martian

“True, I only properly started talking with Todd half an hour ago, but every instance of undying love was only half an hour young, once upon a time.”
― David Mitchell, Slade House

“How to Leave the Planet

1. Phone NASA. Their phone number is (713) 483-3111. Explain that it’s very important that you get away as soon as possible.
2. If they do not cooperate, phone any friend you may have in the White House�(202) 456-1414—to have a word on your behalf with the guys at NASA.
3. If you don’t have any friends in the White House, phone the Kremlin (ask the overseas operator for 0107-095-295-9051). They don’t have any friends there either (at least, none to speak of), but they do seem to have a little influence, so you may as well try.
4. If that also fails, phone the Pope for guidance. His telephone number is 011-39-6-6982, and I gather his switchboard is infallible.
5. If all these attempts fail, flag down a passing flying saucer and explain that it’s vitally important that you get away before your phone bill arrives.”
― Douglas Adams