Bad Dates Quotes
Quotes tagged as "bad-dates"
Showing 1-11 of 11

“And just as I'm about to lay on the Yi-Wang-Smooth, I see Lay #1 and Lay #3 show up to our table and take the two empty seats nearby.
From: "My Worst Valentine's Day.Ever: a Short Story”
― Stories and Scripts: an Anthology
From: "My Worst Valentine's Day.Ever: a Short Story”
― Stories and Scripts: an Anthology

“Everything is going as planned until I notice that Ashley has barely touched her wine glass or food after ordering the priciest bottle and several of the most expensive dishes on the menu.
From "My Worst Valentine's Day.Ever: a Short Story”
― Stories and Scripts: an Anthology
From "My Worst Valentine's Day.Ever: a Short Story”
― Stories and Scripts: an Anthology

“If I could do all of that on February 14th, it would be a personal best for me. Something to share with my crew for the glory and the laughs, or to cheer up the next buddy of mine to get dumped or cheated on.
From "My Worst Valentine's Day.Ever: A Short Story”
― Stories and Scripts: an Anthology
From "My Worst Valentine's Day.Ever: A Short Story”
― Stories and Scripts: an Anthology
“Dating on this island is like fishing in the Hudson River. There's a real strong chance that anything you catch is either toxic, diseased, or dead inside.”
― Heaven and Hurricanes
― Heaven and Hurricanes

“Worse, this wasn’t the usual online date where she could excuse herself if the guy wasn’t her flavor of ice cream.”
― Soul Solution
― Soul Solution
“You’re repulsive, Mike.â€�
“H³Ü³ó?â€�
“I said, you’re impulsive. Such a fun, impulsive guy.â€� When Leah looked into her date’s little eyes, she couldn’t help picturing Mavis Fletcher’s prize sow Gertie in a two-thousand-dollar silk suit and a gold Tag Heuer watch.”
―
“H³Ü³ó?â€�
“I said, you’re impulsive. Such a fun, impulsive guy.â€� When Leah looked into her date’s little eyes, she couldn’t help picturing Mavis Fletcher’s prize sow Gertie in a two-thousand-dollar silk suit and a gold Tag Heuer watch.”
―
“You’re repulsive, Mike.â€�
“H³Ü³ó?â€�
“I said, you’re impulsive. Such a fun, impulsive guy.â€� When Leah looked into her date’s little eyes, she couldn’t help picturing Mavis Fletcher’s prize sow Gertie in a two-thousand-dollar silk suit and a gold Tag Heuer watch.”
―
“H³Ü³ó?â€�
“I said, you’re impulsive. Such a fun, impulsive guy.â€� When Leah looked into her date’s little eyes, she couldn’t help picturing Mavis Fletcher’s prize sow Gertie in a two-thousand-dollar silk suit and a gold Tag Heuer watch.”
―
“We had a couple of dates, which were fine. She was a very politically active lesbian, working for international agencies on human rights issues, and while my queerness is very real and important, I am not that gung-ho. It meant I wondered what she saw in me. It turned out she was new in town and hoping I could integrate her into the scene. She also, in every single one of her texts, pretended to be a robot.
'Boop beep,' she'd add. 'Beep boop.”
― You Ruin It When You Talk
'Boop beep,' she'd add. 'Beep boop.”
― You Ruin It When You Talk
“As we were walking back to his, I asked him to pay me a compliment.
'No,' he said. 'I am terrible at it.'
This was not what I wanted to hear, but you're supposed to give people a chance. 'Try.'
'I don't know what to say.'
'You like me because I am...'
He spluttered and flailed until he said, 'I like you because you're spirited.'
'Like a horse.'
'No! That's not what I mean. I mean, you're forceful.'
'Like a rapist horse.”
― You Ruin It When You Talk
'No,' he said. 'I am terrible at it.'
This was not what I wanted to hear, but you're supposed to give people a chance. 'Try.'
'I don't know what to say.'
'You like me because I am...'
He spluttered and flailed until he said, 'I like you because you're spirited.'
'Like a horse.'
'No! That's not what I mean. I mean, you're forceful.'
'Like a rapist horse.”
― You Ruin It When You Talk
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