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Lissa's Reviews > The Host
The Host (The Host, #1)
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“Did you have a good bath?� he says as I come out after only an hour.
“No,� I say, recognising that my tone is petulant.
“Why not?� he asks in surprise, as the answer is usually the opposite.
“I hate the book. Nothing is happening. Nothing has happened. And the aliens who invaded still make junk food. This doesn’t make sense. They don’t earn money or pay for anything, but they still make junk food. An alien invader who could read the mind of its host would learn to only make food with essential nutrients and stuff, to keep the populace as healthy as possible. They wouldn't waste time and effort making junk food.�
I give up.
I just can’t do it.
107 pages and nothing has happened.
This book literally put me to sleep. I said I was in the bath for an hour. I was asleep for half of that time. And then I was so mad that the book was so shitty I got out of a perfectly nice bath.
And it's made me half sad and half really fucking angry. I like Twilight. It's not the best book or series in the world but it is special to me because I burned out my reading after doing a literature degree, and it took me a year to even pick up a book. Twilight was that book. It welcomed me back into the world of reading, and I've slowly been enjoying it more and more for the past two years. It was easy to read, fast, and relatively painless until you start looking at the deeper aspects.
If I had picked up The Host in September of 2009 instead of Twilight, I probably wouldn't be reading yet.
This book is fucking stupid. I don't care how much worldbuilding has gone on or how many different species of aliens there are or even what it's like seeing their worlds from their perspective. Which I should, becasue that is what is awesome about sci-fi. But who the fuck would want to live their life as an inter-connected sea weed? Or a land-based plant? They don't do anything. They just grow and reproduce. They don't live. They just exist.
EDIT
How THE FUCK did this parasitic species evolve? In Animorphs, the book series by Katherine Applegate the idea pretty much mirrors (I know it's not original but I grew up with it so bite me), the Yeerks evolved alongside the Gedds, and the Gedds were pretty crappy hosts anyway. The Yeerks were expanding to give their brethren better hosts so they could experience the world like everyone else: notably, Yeerks are blind, and they love being able to see through their hosts. Souls are obliterating entire races just because they think they can do better.
How the hell did souls evolve and how the fuck did they evolve so that they need to be surgically implanted? The Yeerks evolved a way of doing it themselves, with anaesthetic solutions to dull the pain of drilling into the brain. The souls literally makes no sense. To gain the abilities to take over the brain of another host you'd need very specific evolution, and when technology is introduced evolution stops. This is why humans haven't evolved for a very long time, because they've been using tools and technology for ages - manipulating the world around you, adapting to change (such as wearing clothing in colder climates) leads to no need to evolve, for example, fur. So how do you get a soul from its pre-parasitic days to a parasitic state via evolution if they need to be surgically attached?
END EDIT
And what is Meyer's obsession with eyes being able to give people away? In Twilight, red-eyed vamps are the bad guys and golden-eyed vamps are the good guys (I don't remember if anyone says what colour eyes the vamps who drink donated blood from a bag have). In The Host, the parasites give people a shine around their pupil. Meyer may be reading too deeply into the whole 'eyes and the window to the soul' thing. Ha ha, I just made a funny.
And the book opened with a scene that was just contradictory. (view spoiler). Don't say something is really fucking easy and then go and show exactly how not-easy it is. Fucking fuck fuck (can you tell I'm exasperated?).
And where is the conflict? (view spoiler)
If this was Meyer's first attempt at getting published, she would have been laughed out of the industry. I read 107 pages and nothing has happened! At least in 100 pages Bella had met Edward! There is such a thing called THE INCITING FUCKING INCIDENT and as an aspiring traditionally-published author, I pretty much chase what the agents say they want. Such as no prologues, for example. So it pisses me the hell off when an established author wields such clout no one cares what the fuck she writes so long as she puts out another book *cough*Cassandra Clare*cough*.
Sometimes inciting incidents are happening on the first page! The first chapter! It's totally awesome when that happens. But why should I bother reading the rest of the book when I've given it 100 pages to give me anything and all it's done is wasted my time?
I mean, why should us newbies stick to the rules when veterans can break them and still rake in a payload?
I know the answer to that. They're famous. And it boggles my mind WHY.
I hope Meyer wrote this in her spare time for herself because I fucking love light sci-fi and I hate to think she sat down and decided the market needed this.
This book should be ashamed to call itself sci-fi.
I was looking forward to reading this because I'm doing NaNoWriMo and I need a book that isn't totally awesome and I want to spend all day reading (Unearthly, Divergent, Bloodlines, Shiver). But it's just made me fucking mad.
Mello and Cory, I should have listened to you. I'm so sorry. Forgive me.
I can't write any more because the nap in the bath made me sleepy and when I get sleepy I get emotional and I refuse to cry because I hate a book so fucking much.
I'm going to go bury myself in a GOOD BOOK because I am sick to fucking death of being burned by bad ones. But first I need a cuddle and to be assured there are still good books out there because the last time I felt this bad about a book (Fallen, Torment) I ended up giving those books away (despite their GORGEOUS cover art) and I NEVER give books away.
EVER.
“No,� I say, recognising that my tone is petulant.
“Why not?� he asks in surprise, as the answer is usually the opposite.
“I hate the book. Nothing is happening. Nothing has happened. And the aliens who invaded still make junk food. This doesn’t make sense. They don’t earn money or pay for anything, but they still make junk food. An alien invader who could read the mind of its host would learn to only make food with essential nutrients and stuff, to keep the populace as healthy as possible. They wouldn't waste time and effort making junk food.�
I give up.
I just can’t do it.
107 pages and nothing has happened.
This book literally put me to sleep. I said I was in the bath for an hour. I was asleep for half of that time. And then I was so mad that the book was so shitty I got out of a perfectly nice bath.
And it's made me half sad and half really fucking angry. I like Twilight. It's not the best book or series in the world but it is special to me because I burned out my reading after doing a literature degree, and it took me a year to even pick up a book. Twilight was that book. It welcomed me back into the world of reading, and I've slowly been enjoying it more and more for the past two years. It was easy to read, fast, and relatively painless until you start looking at the deeper aspects.
If I had picked up The Host in September of 2009 instead of Twilight, I probably wouldn't be reading yet.
This book is fucking stupid. I don't care how much worldbuilding has gone on or how many different species of aliens there are or even what it's like seeing their worlds from their perspective. Which I should, becasue that is what is awesome about sci-fi. But who the fuck would want to live their life as an inter-connected sea weed? Or a land-based plant? They don't do anything. They just grow and reproduce. They don't live. They just exist.
EDIT
How THE FUCK did this parasitic species evolve? In Animorphs, the book series by Katherine Applegate the idea pretty much mirrors (I know it's not original but I grew up with it so bite me), the Yeerks evolved alongside the Gedds, and the Gedds were pretty crappy hosts anyway. The Yeerks were expanding to give their brethren better hosts so they could experience the world like everyone else: notably, Yeerks are blind, and they love being able to see through their hosts. Souls are obliterating entire races just because they think they can do better.
How the hell did souls evolve and how the fuck did they evolve so that they need to be surgically implanted? The Yeerks evolved a way of doing it themselves, with anaesthetic solutions to dull the pain of drilling into the brain. The souls literally makes no sense. To gain the abilities to take over the brain of another host you'd need very specific evolution, and when technology is introduced evolution stops. This is why humans haven't evolved for a very long time, because they've been using tools and technology for ages - manipulating the world around you, adapting to change (such as wearing clothing in colder climates) leads to no need to evolve, for example, fur. So how do you get a soul from its pre-parasitic days to a parasitic state via evolution if they need to be surgically attached?
END EDIT
And what is Meyer's obsession with eyes being able to give people away? In Twilight, red-eyed vamps are the bad guys and golden-eyed vamps are the good guys (I don't remember if anyone says what colour eyes the vamps who drink donated blood from a bag have). In The Host, the parasites give people a shine around their pupil. Meyer may be reading too deeply into the whole 'eyes and the window to the soul' thing. Ha ha, I just made a funny.
And the book opened with a scene that was just contradictory. (view spoiler). Don't say something is really fucking easy and then go and show exactly how not-easy it is. Fucking fuck fuck (can you tell I'm exasperated?).
And where is the conflict? (view spoiler)
If this was Meyer's first attempt at getting published, she would have been laughed out of the industry. I read 107 pages and nothing has happened! At least in 100 pages Bella had met Edward! There is such a thing called THE INCITING FUCKING INCIDENT and as an aspiring traditionally-published author, I pretty much chase what the agents say they want. Such as no prologues, for example. So it pisses me the hell off when an established author wields such clout no one cares what the fuck she writes so long as she puts out another book *cough*Cassandra Clare*cough*.
Sometimes inciting incidents are happening on the first page! The first chapter! It's totally awesome when that happens. But why should I bother reading the rest of the book when I've given it 100 pages to give me anything and all it's done is wasted my time?
I mean, why should us newbies stick to the rules when veterans can break them and still rake in a payload?
I know the answer to that. They're famous. And it boggles my mind WHY.
I hope Meyer wrote this in her spare time for herself because I fucking love light sci-fi and I hate to think she sat down and decided the market needed this.
This book should be ashamed to call itself sci-fi.
I was looking forward to reading this because I'm doing NaNoWriMo and I need a book that isn't totally awesome and I want to spend all day reading (Unearthly, Divergent, Bloodlines, Shiver). But it's just made me fucking mad.
Mello and Cory, I should have listened to you. I'm so sorry. Forgive me.
I can't write any more because the nap in the bath made me sleepy and when I get sleepy I get emotional and I refuse to cry because I hate a book so fucking much.
I'm going to go bury myself in a GOOD BOOK because I am sick to fucking death of being burned by bad ones. But first I need a cuddle and to be assured there are still good books out there because the last time I felt this bad about a book (Fallen, Torment) I ended up giving those books away (despite their GORGEOUS cover art) and I NEVER give books away.
EVER.
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The Host.
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Reading Progress
February 13, 2011
– Shelved
November 2, 2011
–
Started Reading
November 6, 2011
–
10.02%
"If nothing interesting happens by page 100 I am throwing this book at the wall. Whatever happened to the whole 'grip your readers on the first page and don't let go' style of prose? What are publishers doing to us readers?"
page
62
November 6, 2011
–
Finished Reading
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by
Steph
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rated it 3 stars
Nov 04, 2011 06:01AM
But the beginning is boring. And parts of the middle is boring. Then they all live HEA.
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Hmm... I was right. That doesn't happen often enough.
Just... meh. Review complete.
Awww. I like that book.But junk food is so yummy, not even aliens would want to give it up.
i bought this book because I thought "The premise is awesome, though! It can't be bad!" I was sadly mistaken. My copy was immediately sold to the used book store. No regrets.
ugh. i feel your pain. that sucks. hopefully you can find another suitable not the best book to occupy your when not Nanoing. You could try reading a good but very DENSE book that i'm currently slogging through (and that's not a negative thing! it's just a very densely written book so i can't read much at once - and its 900 odd pages (on my e-reader that is). It's Jonathan Strange & Mr. Norrell (i can never remember if its one or 2 r's) by Susanna Clarke
Time to read Daughter of Smoke and Bone. I read The Host right after reading Twilight (the first time). I had read reviews of people liking it better than Twilight. After reading it, I couldn't understand how that was possible. This book takes a really long time to get started and there is no reason you should keep your readers hanging for half the book! Also, I couldn't understand why it wasn't in the YA genre. It did not read like a more mature book. This is a book that I know I couldn't read again. Not even for the lolz.
The first time I read Twilight I gave it 5 stars. Now it has 1.5. The first time I read The Host I gave it 3 stars...you do the math. -_-
I'm calmer now, so let me respond to everyone who commented while I was receiving calm-down cuddles.Archer: I couldn't think of the appropriate Star Wars joke. Thank you for making it for me.
Suz: The premise of this novel is right up my street. I was groomed for this novel when I read Animorphs. But I just can't go on. The writing itself is not dull to me, it's the non-plot.
Synesthesia: I considered that, but the benefits of eradicating junk food far outweigh the negatives. Junk food is part of what keeps the economy strong. With no economy to sustain and a healthy populace to produce, there is no need for it at all.
Brian: Thanks very much for your support. I wish you all the best in your career. Have you looked into self-publishing? It might be a viable option. Sometimes I wonder if I even want to be a part of the traditional industry when they print things like this and oh a list about as long as my arm that should never have been put to paper.
Megan: My partner and I are moving to Australia in the near future. This book will not be coming with us.
Caitlin: LOL I think I'll pass on the dense book. I'm going to give the fifth book in the Night Huntress series a go, This Side of the Grave. A real adult book.
Stephanie: You're not wrong. I've only heard good things about it. I'll probably get it for Christmas. Also, the 'relationship' between a seventeen year old girl and a twenty six year old man makes me want to vomit. It's worse than Vampire Academy.
Skyla: the sequels are named on ŷ, but they don't have publication dates. I think she's working on a mermaid series or something at the moment. But hell, if I had Meyer's money I'd probably just be rolling around in it all day laughing and
Then again, one could just make junk food healthier. It's sad to get rid of cheetos altogether.Dang, I want cheetos...
Hey! I like to pretend organic white cheddar Cheetos and Newman Os are good for me!
If it is worse that Twilight...well, what a pity ŷ doesn't have a negative scale for assessing a book. Minus three? Minus four?
So this is why I never read the book. Ah, sweet escape.
Haha, nice review. I didn't mind this if I'm honest, was MUCH better than 'Twilight' but then I was hopped up on codeine at the time so anything I read during that time I was finding pretty interesting.
Archer wrote: "Angela wrote: "Haha, nice review. I didn't mind this if I'm honest, was MUCH better than 'Twilight' but then I was hopped up on codeine at the time so anything I read during that time I was finding..."It's amazing what shite you'll read when you're high. Not that I'm saying this is shite, but I read 'Lord of the Rings' when I was in hospital and high on morphine. 'Twas awesome, and even the songs/poetry made so much sense at the time!
Angela wrote: "...I read 'Lord of the Rings' when I was in hospital and high on morphine. 'Twas awesome, and even the songs/poetry made so much sense at the time! "Now, that is funny. I read the Finnish translation after swearing for years that I never would. It was so so very boring.
Loads of my friends hated 'LOTR' for the mere fact that they thought it was boring. Think I'll only reread it if I ever find myself back in hospital for an extended period. So was it boring because it was in Finnish or just in general?
Angela wrote: "Loads of my friends hated 'LOTR' for the mere fact that they thought it was boring. Think I'll only reread it if I ever find myself back in hospital for an extended period. So was it boring becau..."
As in general. Usually the Finnish translators work miracles on the books that are horrid in their native languages. I can attest to that having read Twilight and the Farseer Trilogy both in Finnish and in English.
Brian wrote: "Lissa: I know what you mean. I haven't - not yet at least. If the book I'm working on at the moment is rejected across the board I might consider self-pubbing it."There's absolutely nothing wrong with that. Début novels tend to have to be really kind of rigid in structure. The novel I'm querying isn't début novel material, and I'm aware of this, but I'm not giving up just yet.
I will PM you, because I feel it's not appropriate to talk in detail about my book in a review dedicated to The Host... LOL.
Archer wrote: "Lissa wrote: "I will PM you, because I feel it's not appropriate to talk in detail about my book in a review dedicated to The Host... LOL."Why not, at least then people will talk about a good book?"
Shush, you'll make me blush.
Taneika (Flipping Through The Pages...) wrote: "I'm yet to read this, and it's not exactly at the top of my TBR pile.. but I LOVE this review!! This was great! Sorry you didn't have a nice bath, because I love baths..."I hadn't had a bath in ages because I'm a shower person and after doing my NaNo words for the day I thought I deserved a nice bath and maybe the book would start being good but I was wrong! That's what I get for being optimistic!
Taneika (Flipping Through The Pages...) wrote: "Aww, well I hope the next book you read is a trillion times better! Also, in regards to NaNo, I'm going to sign up next year because it sounds frightening and fun :)"You totally should! It is both scary and awesome. If you fail, there's no repercussions, but if you win you get a whole novel in just a month. Win!
Ghirardelli wrote: "This review is beautiful!"Thanks very much. I don't think it's a great review myself, but everyone else seems to like it.
I liked this book, but your review showed me SO many things that I didn't even think about while reading. I may have to go back and read it again just so I can see all this stuff I missed. Not now, though...I'm way too busy, and I'm pretty sure I won't like it as much as I initially did (when I was in my immortalize-Stephenie-Meyer phase).
Penelope wrote: "I liked this book, but your review showed me SO many things that I didn't even think about while reading. I may have to go back and read it again just so I can see all this stuff I missed. Not now,..."I only read the first 100 odd pages. If you can make it that far and think critically, that's good. When you have time, I mean.
I would never even consider reading this book but I enjoyed reading about how much you hate it. Thanks for the laughs!
Thanks, Nikki.Ooooh, Skyla, that's a challenge!
I was ready to put the book down after the first chapter but i pushed myself to continue reading it and found most of the good stuff starts in the pages 120 and up
That's awesome Meg, well done on getting to the good stuff.
This is the most accurate review of The Host. The book sucks and it just made me angry. I spent $30 on this book. You know what I could've done with that?
Wsb wrote: "This is the most accurate review of The Host. The book sucks and it just made me angry. I spent $30 on this book. You know what I could've done with that?"Glad I'm not the only one who got angry!
What could you have spent $30 on? Um... a GOOD book?
(I see Archer already provided that answer... oops)
Best review ever written! Loved it. Five stars. Did you know Snooki (really) has already published TWO books? Tells you everything you need to know about the publishing industries total commitment to "quality" writing. And as I write this George "Jar Jar Binks" Lucas is penning another masterpiece of brilliant boundary pushing sci-fi. Me-sa so happy! Oh, and Adam Sandler is hard at work on writing a prequel to his award winning masterwork "Jack and Jill."
What chance to we have getting published in a world of such brilliant Titans?
Thanks for your kind comments, Verbal! And also thanks for your intriguingly spiky ones!The publishing industry goes after what they think they can sell. Unfortunately for today's crowd, that often means the lowest common denominator.
There's no need to be so hostile. As you've probably noticed, the authors (published) here on ŷ are supportive of other authors, rating their books, giving comments, etc. If you keep up a bad attitude, not sans any swearing towards a "crappy" book, it'll all come back around. Personally, I found the the characters likeable, the premise well executed, and discovered it to be an all-around good book. Look, you're entitled to your opinion. Just don't shove it down people's throats. Don't judge people who like the book, and don't bash the author, because that's no way to get into the writing world.
Sofie wrote: "There's no need to be so hostile. As you've probably noticed, the authors (published) here on ŷ are supportive of other authors, rating their books, giving comments, etc. If you keep up a bad attitude, not sans any swearing towards a "crappy" book, it'll all come back around. Personally, I found the the characters likeable, the premise well executed, and discovered it to be an all-around good book. Look, you're entitled to your opinion. Just don't shove it down people's throats. Don't judge people who like the book, and don't bash the author, because that's no way to get into the writing word. "
I can't believe you're scolding others for having an opinion and "shoving it down people's throats" in the exact same seven line comment where you are voicing (and thus showing you have one) an opinion and shoving it down the throats of the reviewer and people who have an email subscription for new the comments on this thread.
And was that bolded part a not so subtle thread to Lissa's writing career? I can't fucking believe you people with "be nice" mentality. Go bugger off and be nice somewhere else.
rameau wrote: "Sofie wrote: "There's no need to be so hostile. As you've probably noticed, the authors (published) here on ŷ are supportive of other authors, rating their books, giving comments, etc. If y..."Threat? Look, I'm no-one in the writing world. I'm not calling all the publishers, telling them not to take on anything Lissa sends in because she didn't like a book. I just meant that it's the same thing for, lets say, Facebook. People post pictures of themselves drinking underage, employers and universities and whatnot will always have access to that. Of course, the difference is, one is illegal and one isn't. But I don't think publishers will be too compelled to give something a chance when the author has a negative attitude toward other books. It's not a threat. I'm sorry if it came across that way, to both you and Lissa. And I'm also sorry if my being nice right now offends you.
Skyla (Happy Go Lucky and Lost in Books) wrote: "Sofie wrote: "There's no need to be so hostile. As you've probably noticed, the authors (published) here on ŷ are supportive of other authors, rating their books, giving comments, etc. If y..."I shouldn't have worded it that way, you're right. I didn't mean shove down people's throats, really. I like to read negative reviews to see valid points as to things the author could have done better. I've read some, and upon reading them, noticed things in a book I hadn't paid attention to. I like to remain objective, even if I personally enjoyed the book. I was just looking for some perspective.
I'm sorry, though. I didn't mean to come off as hostile, either.
Skyla (Happy Go Lucky and Lost in Books) wrote: "Sofie wrote: "rameau wrote: "Sofie wrote: "There's no need to be so hostile. As you've probably noticed, the authors (published) here on ŷ are supportive of other authors, rating their book..."I definitely don't think people should lie in a review. If you don't like a book, that's totally fine. Write a review, express your opinion, point things out! I just think they should be justified.
I would rather read an honest review as well, honestly. And I completely agree with her about the Mortal Instruments series (I did NOT enjoy those books). I just feel like maybe reviews need more substance than just "this book fucking sucked" or "what a waste of fucking time" or "how the fuck did this get published". But I see where people come from, I do. I get frustrated with books too, to the point where I don't finish them, rant about them to my friends, sneer when i see their cover at the bookstore. But I'm always careful not to go into reviews with the mentality that "my opinion is the right opinion".
Sofie wrote: "rameau wrote: "Sofie wrote: "There's no need to be so hostile. As you've probably noticed, the authors (published) here on ŷ are supportive of other authors, rating their books, giving comm..."Yes, threat. I mistyped.
The difference is professionalism. Or should be. These days as Skyla points out, publishers buy what sells and don't really care what kind of PR timebomb they acquire at the same time.
And that's a huge leap from one negative review to a "bad attitude" towards all books. Lissa can find redeemable qualities in books I think are utter crap and should be shredded and are the "I can't believe trees died for this shit" kind. You're so barking up the wrong tree.
And I really don't understand why you're dragging Facebook and illegalities here unless it's to point out the internet foot and fingerprints are quite permanent, in which case, good for you for being smart enough to realise that.
If I were you though, I'd shut up because I'm only getting mad and nothing you say makes me think you're as naive as you're pretending to be.
I liked The Host a 'wee' bit more than the Twilight series. But maybe because I wanted to like it?! Haha. I loved your thoughts on the evolution <3
naw Cold water defeats the purpose of bathing while reading.
Your review was honest and funny. I felt the same way during those 100 pages. It probably took me a couple weeks until I got past that point. Then I couldn't put the book down. It got good. But that's just me. I'm sorry you weren't able to enjoy it. Maybe you'll change your mind someday. They're even releasing it in theater in March. =)
I must say I hated the first hundred or so pages. I almost never finished the book. But I think once it gets going it is very good.
i think you could be my twin. lol your review reflects my own thoughts perfectly. I tried to read this book as soon as it came out and never even came close to finishing it. I bought it and now it's just collecting dust on my bookshelf. Now there is a movie...wth? I am reading reviews trying to decide if it's worth trying to read the book (again) but I'm having my doubts.
Best review every. I thought mine was funny I was wrong. God she didn't even try did she? :-) cheers
I read this book a few years ago, the first bit was cheesy, and then I started to like it... But half way through it I couldn't stand it. It was slow, boring, and never ending
