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emma's Reviews > Bad Feminist
Bad Feminist
by
by
emma's review
bookshelves: nonfiction, non-ya, diverse, project-genius, 4-stars, reviewed, recommend, project-pride, owned, lgbt-plus, authors-of-color
Jun 01, 2021
bookshelves: nonfiction, non-ya, diverse, project-genius, 4-stars, reviewed, recommend, project-pride, owned, lgbt-plus, authors-of-color
my becoming-a-genius project, part 12!
for those not yet in the know - sorry for the negative impact this will have on your life, and:
i have decided to become a genius.
to accomplish this, i'm going to work my way through the collected stories of various authors, reading + reviewing 1 story every day until i get bored / lose every single follower / am struck down by a vengeful deity.
last month, i read only books by asian authors, but i didn't think ahead enough and connect my genius project to that. this month, as i read only books with LGBTQ+ authors/rep, i will make NO SUCH MISTAKE.
these are essays, not stories, but still. i make the rules and i say it counts.
PROJECT 1: THE COMPLETE STORIES BY FLANNERY O'CONNOR
PROJECT 2: HER BODY AND OTHER PARTIES BY CARMEN MARIA MACHADO
PROJECT 3: 18 BEST STORIES BY EDGAR ALLAN POE
PROJECT 4: THE LOTTERY AND OTHER STORIES BY SHIRLEY JACKSON
PROJECT 5: HOW LONG 'TIL BLACK FUTURE MONTH? BY N.K. JEMISIN
PROJECT 6: THE SHORT STORIES OF OSCAR WILDE BY OSCAR WILDE
PROJECT 7: THE BLUE FAIRY BOOK BY ANDREW LANG
PROJECT 8: GRAND UNION: STORIES BY ZADIE SMITH
PROJECT 9: THE BEST OF ROALD DAHL BY ROALD DAHL
PROJECT 10: LOVE AND FREINDSHIP BY JANE AUSTEN
PROJECT 11: HOMESICK FOR ANOTHER WORLD BY OTTESSA MOSHFEGH
PROJECT 12: BAD FEMINIST BY ROXANE GAY
DAY 1: INTRODUCTION: FEMINISM (N) PLURAL
i very very much liked this but also now "feminism" doesn't look like a word.
rating: 4.5
DAY 2: FEEL ME. SEE ME. HEAR ME. REACH ME.
this was kind of a weird mishmash of different things and felt all over the place. which is cool but maybe not ideal for the second entry in a collection of essays?
i'm still trying to find my footing here, man. can't just throw me in the damn pool. (that happened to me once in my final year of swim lessons, which was the pre-swim team level. some lady literally pushed me into the pool. guess what? i didn't join the swim team.)
(in fairness there is not a snowball's chance in hell i would've joined it voluntarily regardless, but amping up the scope of this trauma convinced my mom it would have been cruel and unusual to make me. so.)
rating: 3
DAY 3, PART 1: PECULIAR BENEFITS
i just realized there are like 42 essays in this story so...going to amp this up and read 2 a day. i don't have it in me to be reading the same book for a month and a half right now.
this is, like...a good if not groundbreaking piece about privilege.
rating: 3.25
DAY 3, PART 2: TYPICAL FIRST YEAR PROFESSOR
i do not like the condescension toward what students wear in this - it's college? we're supposed to have grown out of high school dress code you're being distracting mentality.
also it seems a little, uh, non-self-aware to use space in your essay collection about feminism to call out ways women don't dress appropriately in your eyes (sweatpants with words across the ass, bra straps exposed) that are actually kind of like. fine?
anyway. if i'm not being persnickety and getting hung up on the contents of one paragraph i can admit i thought this one was very honest and sweet and good.
rating: 4
DAY 4, PART 1: TO SCRATCH, CLAW, OR GROPE CLUMSILY OR FRANTICALLY
"I approach most things in life with a dangerous level of confidence to balance my generally low self-esteem." goals tbh.
turns out i enjoy reading about competitive scrabble.
rating: 3.75
DAY 4, PART 2: HOW TO BE FRIENDS WITH ANOTHER WOMAN
immediately i am nervous about this because never once have i needed instructions on this subject.
this also fairly quickly includes the sentence "If you feel like it's hard to be friends with women, consider that maybe women aren't the problem. Maybe it's just you," which i agree with but also feels like an admission that this whole essay is pretty unnecessary.
i don't know why i'm being grumpy. this is actually very sweet.
rating: 4
DAY 5, PART 1: GIRLS, GIRLS, GIRLS
the beginning of this i loved very much. i wish this was a little more autobiographical.
then again i am addicted to memoirs, so it could be that.
rating: 3.75
DAY 5, PART 2: I ONCE WAS MISS AMERICA
this made me want to read the sweet valley high books, which is a statement i never expected to write.
rating: 4
DAY 6, PART 1: GARISH, GLORIOUS SPECTACLES
the first part of this is mostly talking about two books, but then i wanted to read the two books so i didn't want them spoiled for me, so i kind of skimmed it to avoid getting too much of the stories, but then the rest of it was using the lens just created using those two books to analyze reality TV, so i feel like i didn't quite get so much out of this as i could have.
no rating
DAY 6, PART 2: NOT HERE TO MAKE FRIENDS
this is an essay in large part about how silly it is to say a character is unlikable as a criticism of a story - which is also something i've been thinking about a lot lately.
as i get older, i appreciate unlikable characters more, and also less and less often think of an unlikable character as a negative aspect of a story.
this makes me want to go through every review i've ever written and redo it.
also it excerpts the gone girl cool girl monologue, which is always a plus in my book.
rating: 4.5
DAY 7, PART 1: HOW WE ALL LOSE
this essay really made me regret reading anything by caitlin moran. f*ck you, caitlin moran.
this essay also made me feel very validated in how much i was unable to enjoy The Brief Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao because of the unconscionable and unrelenting sexism, which everyone in my freshman-year lit class hated me for pointing out. (this is probably the 100th time i've mentioned.)
and thirdly, this essay made me really hope the lit-crit essays stop coming one after another. is that the whole book? go back please.
rating: 3.75
DAY 7, PART 2: REACHING FOR CATHARSIS: GETTING FAT RIGHT (OR WRONG) AND DIANA SPECHLER'S SKINNY
this was so excellent. we need more addresses of fatphobia like this.
rating: 4.5
DAY 8, PART 1: THE SMOOTH SURFACES OF IDYLL
"Sometimes, and especially as a writer, I feel like I have no idea what happiness is, what it looks like, what it feels like, how to show it on the page."
to quote john mulaney: THAT'S THE THING I'M SENSITIVE ABOUT!
rating: 4.25
DAY 8, PART 2: THE CARELESS LANGUAGE OF SEXUAL VIOLENCE
bold move of me to spend my morning reading essays with titles like this one! what a way to start the day, and so on.
this has some very good insights and a compelling thesis and it was so insanely short.
rating: 4
DAY 9, PART 1: WHAT WE HUNGER FOR
whoa.
rating: 4.5
DAY 9, PART 2: THE ILLUSION OF SAFETY / THE SAFETY OF ILLUSION
i find this a very outdated and deliberately inconsiderate view of trigger warnings - especially because people rarely, if ever, expect trigger warnings from the author themselves and will instead seek them out from readers. going out of your way to get irritated about something no one is asking for is very terminally online behavior (derogatory).
rating: 1
DAY 10, PART 1: THE SPECTACLE OF BROKEN MEN
this was kind of a presentation of facts, as far as these things go, but i'm not sure how one would even present an opinion on this. obviously famous athletes include violent criminals in their number; obviously this is a bad thing; obviously it's an inextricable part of professional sports and it's hard to imagine how to address something so pervasive.
rating: 3.5
DAY 10, PART 2: A TALE OF THREE COMING OUT STORIES
this one is weird because it literally says that supporting musicians like tyler the creator is wrong to do, because he uses homophobic slurs in his music. but tyler the creator is queer, so i'm not sure what i'm supposed to be getting out of this.
no rating
DAY 11, PART 1: BEYOND THE MEASURE OF MEN
another good if very done-before discussion of "women's fiction" that made me glad i deleted my chick lit shelf recently.
i just think the name chick lit is cute.
rating: 3.5
DAY 11, PART 2: SOME JOKES ARE FUNNIER THAN OTHERS
again, i mean, yeah. this is correct.
rating: 3.5
DAY 12, PART 1: TO THE YOUNG LADIES WHO LOVE CHRIS BROWN SO MUCH THEY WOULD LET HIM BEAT THEM
this one was very, very good.
rating: 4.5
DAY 12, PART 2: BLURRED LINES, INDEED
another excellent one.
rating: 4.5
DAY 13, PART 1: THE TROUBLE WITH PRINCE CHARMING, OR HE WHO TRESPASSED AGAINST US
my library loan of this expires tomorrow and even though there is a beautiful renew button it is merely a torture device i cannot use, so i'm going to try to finish this today. day 13 will have a lot of parts.
honestly i wish this was more about fairytales and romance novels in general than just fifty shades, but this is still necessary criticism, i guess. though i think most people are already aware their dream relationship shouldn't be based off fifty shades?
rating: 3.25
DAY 13, PART 2: THE SOLACE OF PREPARING FRIED FOODS AND OTHER QUAINT REMEMBRANCES FROM 1960S MISSISSIPPI: THOUGHTS ON THE HELP
i read the help when i was in 5th grade and i loved it, something i now find (before reading this essay and to be honest even more so after) very embarrassing and will rectify with a reread and re-review soon.
rating: 4.5
DAY 13, PART 3: SURVIVING DJANGO
this was very f*cking good.
i apologize for being cranky at how much of this is criticism - the author is truly great at it.
rating: 5
DAY 13, PART 4: BEYOND THE STRUGGLE NARRATIVE
i don't know if 12 Years a Slave, being as it is based on the actual story of a slave as he told it, is the best candidate for a lot of this critique, but the unwillingness of critics / awards ceremonies to praise Black movies that aren't about Black pain is a really goddamn needed one.
rating: 3.75
DAY 13, PART 5: THE MORALITY OF TYLER PERRY
when the critique is one of a kind and complex >>>>
that's probably the dorkiest thing i've ever said.
rating: 4.25
DAY 13, PART 6: THE LAST DAY OF A YOUNG BLACK MAN
all right. i will come back to this and finish it either later today or tomorrow because bingeing all these stories like this is antithetical to the whole of the genius project!!!
this was seemingly more summary than criticism? more time was spent detailing the events that occurred in fruitvale station than really analyzing them.
rating: 3.5
DAY 13.5, PART 1: WHEN LESS IS MORE
let's do this.
(it's technically the night of day 13 but we will forgive that transgression.) (okay originally i labeled this day 14 but now i'm going back and changing it to 13.5.)
i have never seen orange is the new black (my cultural ignorance is REALLY showing in this genius project) but this was a good critique of it. i think.
rating: 4
DAY 13.5, PART 2: THE POLITICS OF RESPECTABILITY
still night of day 13. there are 8 more stories. imagine how long this would have taken me if i'd done it normally.
i don't really think it's my place to rate this one but i thought it was excellent.
no rating
DAY 13.5, PART 3: WHEN TWITTER DOES WHAT JOURNALISM CANNOT
i am both twitter's biggest fan and biggest hater so i'm eagerly anticipating this one. also follow me on twitter. i'm on there even more than here.
as expected i loved this.
rating: 4.5
DAY 13.5, PART 4: THE ALIENABLE RIGHTS OF WOMEN
i truly think that to be anti-choice is one of the least empathetic things you can be. i have known many people who quietly believe they know better than others, in broad strokes and in sweeping declarations. i have had very real feelings very recently (even maybe now) for people who feel that they know better than women at large, even as they are typically very caring and kind people.
it is the most discombobulating thing.
anyway. i'm on Nexplanon and i adore it even though it makes me bleed unpredictably from the vagina. such is the world we live in.
rating: 4.5
DAY 13.5, PART 5: HOLDING OUT FOR A HERO
i kind of lost the thread of this one, unfortunately.
rating: 3.5
DAY 14, PART 1: A TALE OF TWO PROFILES
okay. it's officially day 14; i am coming to you live from a moving vehicle but i took a horrific motion sickness pill so i will hopefully survive reading; i was wine drunk and reeling from a surprise loss to my basketball team of choice last night so i apologize if i were more R-rated than my typical PG-13. however it is important to me that i maintain my reputation as the cool book nerd who gets laid.
the profile / profiling through line here is so satisfying and extraordinarily well done.
rating: 4.5
DAY 14, PART 2: THE RACISM WE ALL CARRY
the running theme of my experience with these stories is that they all feel like they were written very quickly and effortlessly by a very smart person - but with editing and further reflection they could be better.
this story about the "rules of racism" describes the paula deen deposition and relates an anecdote, but there's very little in between and it's FRUSTRATING.
rating: 3.75
DAY 14, PART 3: TRAGEDY. CALL. COMPASSION. RESPONSE.
this one still fell under the irritating category i outlined above, but i liked it anyway.
rating: 4.25
DAY 14, PART 4: BAD FEMINIST: TAKE ONE
honestly i think the ways roxane gay claims to be a bad feminist are the ways that make her version of feminism so appealing.
rating: 4
DAY 14, PART 5: BAD FEMINIST: TAKE TWO
what i just said, but even more so.
rating: 5
OVERALL
this collection felt, at many points, half-baked to me, but it's to the credit of roxane gay that even when it seems as though she's not trying very hard to carry across a point, the point itself (and really the way her brain operates) is interesting enough in and of itself.
aka i will read more stuff by her.
rating: 4
---------------
reading all books with LGBTQ+ rep for pride this month!
book 1: the gravity of us
book 2: the great american whatever
book 3: wild beauty
book 4: the affair of the mysterious letter
book 5: how we fight for our lives
book 6: blue lily, lily blue
book 7: the times i knew i was gay
book 8: conventionally yours
book 9: the hollow inside
book 10: nimona
book 11: dark and deepest red
book 12: the house in the cerulean sea
book 13: the raven king
book 14: violet ghosts
book 15: as far as you'll take me
book 16: bad feminist
for those not yet in the know - sorry for the negative impact this will have on your life, and:
i have decided to become a genius.
to accomplish this, i'm going to work my way through the collected stories of various authors, reading + reviewing 1 story every day until i get bored / lose every single follower / am struck down by a vengeful deity.
last month, i read only books by asian authors, but i didn't think ahead enough and connect my genius project to that. this month, as i read only books with LGBTQ+ authors/rep, i will make NO SUCH MISTAKE.
these are essays, not stories, but still. i make the rules and i say it counts.
PROJECT 1: THE COMPLETE STORIES BY FLANNERY O'CONNOR
PROJECT 2: HER BODY AND OTHER PARTIES BY CARMEN MARIA MACHADO
PROJECT 3: 18 BEST STORIES BY EDGAR ALLAN POE
PROJECT 4: THE LOTTERY AND OTHER STORIES BY SHIRLEY JACKSON
PROJECT 5: HOW LONG 'TIL BLACK FUTURE MONTH? BY N.K. JEMISIN
PROJECT 6: THE SHORT STORIES OF OSCAR WILDE BY OSCAR WILDE
PROJECT 7: THE BLUE FAIRY BOOK BY ANDREW LANG
PROJECT 8: GRAND UNION: STORIES BY ZADIE SMITH
PROJECT 9: THE BEST OF ROALD DAHL BY ROALD DAHL
PROJECT 10: LOVE AND FREINDSHIP BY JANE AUSTEN
PROJECT 11: HOMESICK FOR ANOTHER WORLD BY OTTESSA MOSHFEGH
PROJECT 12: BAD FEMINIST BY ROXANE GAY
DAY 1: INTRODUCTION: FEMINISM (N) PLURAL
i very very much liked this but also now "feminism" doesn't look like a word.
rating: 4.5
DAY 2: FEEL ME. SEE ME. HEAR ME. REACH ME.
this was kind of a weird mishmash of different things and felt all over the place. which is cool but maybe not ideal for the second entry in a collection of essays?
i'm still trying to find my footing here, man. can't just throw me in the damn pool. (that happened to me once in my final year of swim lessons, which was the pre-swim team level. some lady literally pushed me into the pool. guess what? i didn't join the swim team.)
(in fairness there is not a snowball's chance in hell i would've joined it voluntarily regardless, but amping up the scope of this trauma convinced my mom it would have been cruel and unusual to make me. so.)
rating: 3
DAY 3, PART 1: PECULIAR BENEFITS
i just realized there are like 42 essays in this story so...going to amp this up and read 2 a day. i don't have it in me to be reading the same book for a month and a half right now.
this is, like...a good if not groundbreaking piece about privilege.
rating: 3.25
DAY 3, PART 2: TYPICAL FIRST YEAR PROFESSOR
i do not like the condescension toward what students wear in this - it's college? we're supposed to have grown out of high school dress code you're being distracting mentality.
also it seems a little, uh, non-self-aware to use space in your essay collection about feminism to call out ways women don't dress appropriately in your eyes (sweatpants with words across the ass, bra straps exposed) that are actually kind of like. fine?
anyway. if i'm not being persnickety and getting hung up on the contents of one paragraph i can admit i thought this one was very honest and sweet and good.
rating: 4
DAY 4, PART 1: TO SCRATCH, CLAW, OR GROPE CLUMSILY OR FRANTICALLY
"I approach most things in life with a dangerous level of confidence to balance my generally low self-esteem." goals tbh.
turns out i enjoy reading about competitive scrabble.
rating: 3.75
DAY 4, PART 2: HOW TO BE FRIENDS WITH ANOTHER WOMAN
immediately i am nervous about this because never once have i needed instructions on this subject.
this also fairly quickly includes the sentence "If you feel like it's hard to be friends with women, consider that maybe women aren't the problem. Maybe it's just you," which i agree with but also feels like an admission that this whole essay is pretty unnecessary.
i don't know why i'm being grumpy. this is actually very sweet.
rating: 4
DAY 5, PART 1: GIRLS, GIRLS, GIRLS
the beginning of this i loved very much. i wish this was a little more autobiographical.
then again i am addicted to memoirs, so it could be that.
rating: 3.75
DAY 5, PART 2: I ONCE WAS MISS AMERICA
this made me want to read the sweet valley high books, which is a statement i never expected to write.
rating: 4
DAY 6, PART 1: GARISH, GLORIOUS SPECTACLES
the first part of this is mostly talking about two books, but then i wanted to read the two books so i didn't want them spoiled for me, so i kind of skimmed it to avoid getting too much of the stories, but then the rest of it was using the lens just created using those two books to analyze reality TV, so i feel like i didn't quite get so much out of this as i could have.
no rating
DAY 6, PART 2: NOT HERE TO MAKE FRIENDS
this is an essay in large part about how silly it is to say a character is unlikable as a criticism of a story - which is also something i've been thinking about a lot lately.
as i get older, i appreciate unlikable characters more, and also less and less often think of an unlikable character as a negative aspect of a story.
this makes me want to go through every review i've ever written and redo it.
also it excerpts the gone girl cool girl monologue, which is always a plus in my book.
rating: 4.5
DAY 7, PART 1: HOW WE ALL LOSE
this essay really made me regret reading anything by caitlin moran. f*ck you, caitlin moran.
this essay also made me feel very validated in how much i was unable to enjoy The Brief Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao because of the unconscionable and unrelenting sexism, which everyone in my freshman-year lit class hated me for pointing out. (this is probably the 100th time i've mentioned.)
and thirdly, this essay made me really hope the lit-crit essays stop coming one after another. is that the whole book? go back please.
rating: 3.75
DAY 7, PART 2: REACHING FOR CATHARSIS: GETTING FAT RIGHT (OR WRONG) AND DIANA SPECHLER'S SKINNY
this was so excellent. we need more addresses of fatphobia like this.
rating: 4.5
DAY 8, PART 1: THE SMOOTH SURFACES OF IDYLL
"Sometimes, and especially as a writer, I feel like I have no idea what happiness is, what it looks like, what it feels like, how to show it on the page."
to quote john mulaney: THAT'S THE THING I'M SENSITIVE ABOUT!
rating: 4.25
DAY 8, PART 2: THE CARELESS LANGUAGE OF SEXUAL VIOLENCE
bold move of me to spend my morning reading essays with titles like this one! what a way to start the day, and so on.
this has some very good insights and a compelling thesis and it was so insanely short.
rating: 4
DAY 9, PART 1: WHAT WE HUNGER FOR
whoa.
rating: 4.5
DAY 9, PART 2: THE ILLUSION OF SAFETY / THE SAFETY OF ILLUSION
i find this a very outdated and deliberately inconsiderate view of trigger warnings - especially because people rarely, if ever, expect trigger warnings from the author themselves and will instead seek them out from readers. going out of your way to get irritated about something no one is asking for is very terminally online behavior (derogatory).
rating: 1
DAY 10, PART 1: THE SPECTACLE OF BROKEN MEN
this was kind of a presentation of facts, as far as these things go, but i'm not sure how one would even present an opinion on this. obviously famous athletes include violent criminals in their number; obviously this is a bad thing; obviously it's an inextricable part of professional sports and it's hard to imagine how to address something so pervasive.
rating: 3.5
DAY 10, PART 2: A TALE OF THREE COMING OUT STORIES
this one is weird because it literally says that supporting musicians like tyler the creator is wrong to do, because he uses homophobic slurs in his music. but tyler the creator is queer, so i'm not sure what i'm supposed to be getting out of this.
no rating
DAY 11, PART 1: BEYOND THE MEASURE OF MEN
another good if very done-before discussion of "women's fiction" that made me glad i deleted my chick lit shelf recently.
i just think the name chick lit is cute.
rating: 3.5
DAY 11, PART 2: SOME JOKES ARE FUNNIER THAN OTHERS
again, i mean, yeah. this is correct.
rating: 3.5
DAY 12, PART 1: TO THE YOUNG LADIES WHO LOVE CHRIS BROWN SO MUCH THEY WOULD LET HIM BEAT THEM
this one was very, very good.
rating: 4.5
DAY 12, PART 2: BLURRED LINES, INDEED
another excellent one.
rating: 4.5
DAY 13, PART 1: THE TROUBLE WITH PRINCE CHARMING, OR HE WHO TRESPASSED AGAINST US
my library loan of this expires tomorrow and even though there is a beautiful renew button it is merely a torture device i cannot use, so i'm going to try to finish this today. day 13 will have a lot of parts.
honestly i wish this was more about fairytales and romance novels in general than just fifty shades, but this is still necessary criticism, i guess. though i think most people are already aware their dream relationship shouldn't be based off fifty shades?
rating: 3.25
DAY 13, PART 2: THE SOLACE OF PREPARING FRIED FOODS AND OTHER QUAINT REMEMBRANCES FROM 1960S MISSISSIPPI: THOUGHTS ON THE HELP
i read the help when i was in 5th grade and i loved it, something i now find (before reading this essay and to be honest even more so after) very embarrassing and will rectify with a reread and re-review soon.
rating: 4.5
DAY 13, PART 3: SURVIVING DJANGO
this was very f*cking good.
i apologize for being cranky at how much of this is criticism - the author is truly great at it.
rating: 5
DAY 13, PART 4: BEYOND THE STRUGGLE NARRATIVE
i don't know if 12 Years a Slave, being as it is based on the actual story of a slave as he told it, is the best candidate for a lot of this critique, but the unwillingness of critics / awards ceremonies to praise Black movies that aren't about Black pain is a really goddamn needed one.
rating: 3.75
DAY 13, PART 5: THE MORALITY OF TYLER PERRY
when the critique is one of a kind and complex >>>>
that's probably the dorkiest thing i've ever said.
rating: 4.25
DAY 13, PART 6: THE LAST DAY OF A YOUNG BLACK MAN
all right. i will come back to this and finish it either later today or tomorrow because bingeing all these stories like this is antithetical to the whole of the genius project!!!
this was seemingly more summary than criticism? more time was spent detailing the events that occurred in fruitvale station than really analyzing them.
rating: 3.5
DAY 13.5, PART 1: WHEN LESS IS MORE
let's do this.
(it's technically the night of day 13 but we will forgive that transgression.) (okay originally i labeled this day 14 but now i'm going back and changing it to 13.5.)
i have never seen orange is the new black (my cultural ignorance is REALLY showing in this genius project) but this was a good critique of it. i think.
rating: 4
DAY 13.5, PART 2: THE POLITICS OF RESPECTABILITY
still night of day 13. there are 8 more stories. imagine how long this would have taken me if i'd done it normally.
i don't really think it's my place to rate this one but i thought it was excellent.
no rating
DAY 13.5, PART 3: WHEN TWITTER DOES WHAT JOURNALISM CANNOT
i am both twitter's biggest fan and biggest hater so i'm eagerly anticipating this one. also follow me on twitter. i'm on there even more than here.
as expected i loved this.
rating: 4.5
DAY 13.5, PART 4: THE ALIENABLE RIGHTS OF WOMEN
i truly think that to be anti-choice is one of the least empathetic things you can be. i have known many people who quietly believe they know better than others, in broad strokes and in sweeping declarations. i have had very real feelings very recently (even maybe now) for people who feel that they know better than women at large, even as they are typically very caring and kind people.
it is the most discombobulating thing.
anyway. i'm on Nexplanon and i adore it even though it makes me bleed unpredictably from the vagina. such is the world we live in.
rating: 4.5
DAY 13.5, PART 5: HOLDING OUT FOR A HERO
i kind of lost the thread of this one, unfortunately.
rating: 3.5
DAY 14, PART 1: A TALE OF TWO PROFILES
okay. it's officially day 14; i am coming to you live from a moving vehicle but i took a horrific motion sickness pill so i will hopefully survive reading; i was wine drunk and reeling from a surprise loss to my basketball team of choice last night so i apologize if i were more R-rated than my typical PG-13. however it is important to me that i maintain my reputation as the cool book nerd who gets laid.
the profile / profiling through line here is so satisfying and extraordinarily well done.
rating: 4.5
DAY 14, PART 2: THE RACISM WE ALL CARRY
the running theme of my experience with these stories is that they all feel like they were written very quickly and effortlessly by a very smart person - but with editing and further reflection they could be better.
this story about the "rules of racism" describes the paula deen deposition and relates an anecdote, but there's very little in between and it's FRUSTRATING.
rating: 3.75
DAY 14, PART 3: TRAGEDY. CALL. COMPASSION. RESPONSE.
this one still fell under the irritating category i outlined above, but i liked it anyway.
rating: 4.25
DAY 14, PART 4: BAD FEMINIST: TAKE ONE
honestly i think the ways roxane gay claims to be a bad feminist are the ways that make her version of feminism so appealing.
rating: 4
DAY 14, PART 5: BAD FEMINIST: TAKE TWO
what i just said, but even more so.
rating: 5
OVERALL
this collection felt, at many points, half-baked to me, but it's to the credit of roxane gay that even when it seems as though she's not trying very hard to carry across a point, the point itself (and really the way her brain operates) is interesting enough in and of itself.
aka i will read more stuff by her.
rating: 4
---------------
reading all books with LGBTQ+ rep for pride this month!
book 1: the gravity of us
book 2: the great american whatever
book 3: wild beauty
book 4: the affair of the mysterious letter
book 5: how we fight for our lives
book 6: blue lily, lily blue
book 7: the times i knew i was gay
book 8: conventionally yours
book 9: the hollow inside
book 10: nimona
book 11: dark and deepest red
book 12: the house in the cerulean sea
book 13: the raven king
book 14: violet ghosts
book 15: as far as you'll take me
book 16: bad feminist
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June 1, 2021
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June 1, 2021
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June 15, 2021
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Emma
(new)
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rated it 4 stars
Jun 01, 2021 03:24PM
Roxane Gay is low key everything to me but I somehow haven’t read this book so I’m using you as a litmus test, hope you don’t mind
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This is such a cool idea, also can’t wait to hear your thoughts on this book. I think I only gave it 3 stars because the middle really fell apart for me, but I’m super interested in what you’ll think of it.
I keep meaning to read this! It’s on my TBR for this month as I attempt to read books I already have
I love love love this review format!! I always wonder how people consider each individual story to stack up against the collection as a whole. This honestly makes me wanna read the book more than an overarching 4 star.
I love the way you're reviewing this and very much look forward to your thoughts on the rest of the essays! I read this one a few years back and was really not a fan of a lot of it, but I've been thinking about giving it another try to see if it was the book's fault or mine. 🤷♀�
From my understanding - this book was written a while back, before Tyler the Creator came out I think? I remember being very thrown off by his slur usage way back, but then he came out and it made sense in retrospect
I read this collection a while back fresh out of college, and I think my opinions have changed on how much I agree with her sentiments on not supporting people for that reason. As a queer person, I can recognize every one has a different journey with their identity/sexuality, and it's not really my business how they manifest that, whether they are a celebrity or not. Tyler's coming out probably played a big part in my change of heart that "you really don't know what other people are going through" just by seeing a small part of their life.
I loathe the concept of trigger warnings and I’m someone with complex PTSD. I think trigger warnings infantilize readers by not trusting them to stop reading, or skip over parts if something is upsetting. There’s also something to be said about passive exposure go desensitize people to things they find upsetting. We develop resiliency and strength by overcoming obstacles incrementally and we need that strength to thrive in a world full of potentially triggering things. Trigger warnings are a turn off for me because I think they inhibit growth.
Emma wrote: "Roxane Gay is low key everything to me but I somehow haven’t read this book so I’m using you as a litmus test, hope you don’t mind"litmus test...positive? i don't know science
bookswithmaddi wrote: "This is such a cool idea, also can’t wait to hear your thoughts on this book. I think I only gave it 3 stars because the middle really fell apart for me, but I’m super interested in what you’ll thi..."there were some disappointments but i thought it was good overall!
Renee wrote: "I keep meaning to read this! It’s on my TBR for this month as I attempt to read books I already have"love that goal!
Bailey wrote: "I love love love this review format!! I always wonder how people consider each individual story to stack up against the collection as a whole. This honestly makes me wanna read the book more than a..."thank you!!! it makes my brain happy
destiny ♡⚔� wrote: "I love the way you're reviewing this and very much look forward to your thoughts on the rest of the essays! I read this one a few years back and was really not a fan of a lot of it, but I've been t..."thank you!!! honestly i think it could have been the book's...if i didn't space this out so much to start i probably wouldn't have gotten through it!
Jaid wrote: "From my understanding - this book was written a while back, before Tyler the Creator came out I think? I remember being very thrown off by his slur usage way back, but then he came out and it made ..."to me it's more of a question like the idea of the "own voices" label...we can't expect to know the identities of every celebrity and therefore critiquing them using the assumption of their sexuality seems kinda weird to me!
PinkAmy loves books, cats and naps wrote: "I loathe the concept of trigger warnings and I’m someone with complex PTSD. I think trigger warnings infantilize readers by not trusting them to stop reading, or skip over parts if something is ups..."i don't use them myself in spite of having triggers but if other people want them i understand and it's not a bug to me!
