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OK. So. I liked several parts of this book very much. I love that happiness is a choice. I especially appreciated reading about the third agreement: Don't Make Assumptions because communication is something I can always work on. I loved the parts about accepting and loving yourself and others. There is some amazing advise in this little book and I can see how it can be life changing for many people.

But.

I'm going to be honest and admit that Ruiz almost lost me at "Everything is God" in the introduction. Even though it sounds very pretty when said by a dude made of stars and fog, "Everything is God" is a meaningless statement. That's just something people say to blow everyone's mind and make themselves appear deeper than they actually are. Believe what you like about God, but saying everything is God is just the same as saying nothing is God, in which case you ought to go ahead and say what you mean and be a respectable atheist.

He almost lost me again at the John Lennon quote, just before the beginning of Chapter One. Little known fact: John Lennon quotes are a pet peeve of mine. Who knew- right? And then again when he kept using the word "dreamy-dream-dreamer" to make everything sound super emotive and enlightened. Not that there's anything really wrong with that- just not my thing.

And I admit I was annoyed by his over-simplifications, his vagueness about the evils of "the dream of the planet" (societal expectations) and again by his many generalizations- especially about how NO ONE is free to be herself because we're ALL "domesticated" (brainwashed) by society and our parents and teachers and church leaders, ALL blind, ALL narcissists. Which, you know, isn't entirely true.

I'm certainly not a conformist, but I believe there needs to be a balance- some things you should conform to. Like not stealing. Or speeding through residential neighborhoods. Whether I'm personally feeling it or not, many societal expectations aren't relative. They're necessary. On the other hand, if by "the dream of the planet" he means cultural customs like judging people for their hairstyle or the music they like then I agree that "the dream of the planet" is bad news. See, it would be helpful if he were slightly less mysterious in his approach.

Once I managed to sort through the new-age incense and magic (Not my flavor), I actually agreed with the four agreements. Imagine that. It turns out I've heard them before from Mother Teresa, C.S. Lewis, Dr. Seuss, Steven Covey, Jesus Christ, and many others. Life is infinitely better when you're honest and courageous enough to accept yourself, communicative in your relationships, positive, open and loving, forgiving of yourself and others, and continually trying to do your best. That is how we become a happy person. That is what most religions teach. That's what most schools encourage. That's what science shows. Its no secret- its just surprisingly difficult to remember and put into practice. Props to Ruiz for reminding me of this and for writing a book to help others. While his writing style made me vomit a little in my mouth, still he meant well and has assuredly encouraged many on the path to happiness.

I would add, it is my personal belief that our reason for being- our purpose on earth is to learn to be happy. And truly happy people are always good people. Not perfect, but good. And I would add further that it stands to reason that the better a person is, the happier she becomes. Which is where religion takes the four agreements a step further, claiming that we are eternal beings and if so then we are day by day over an eternity either becoming more like God, or less like God. We are either progressing towards perfect happiness or perfect misery. Christianity also adds that we don't need to do this on our own, which idea rings true and logical and brings me comfort.

Wow. Ruiz inspired me to write my own book.