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Persephone's Pomegranate's Reviews > The Iliad
The Iliad
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Persephone's Pomegranate's review
bookshelves: ancient-greece-rome-egypt, classics, historical, mythology, set-in-wartime-soldiers
Jan 21, 2024
bookshelves: ancient-greece-rome-egypt, classics, historical, mythology, set-in-wartime-soldiers
Achilles - sexually ambiguous, rage-prone, has a sensitive tendon.
Patroclus - 'best friend' of Achilles. Ruined everything for everyone.
Odysseus - outsmarted the Trojans, had sex with a witch and a nymph.
Agamemnon - worst husband, worst father, worst Greek, worst human.
Menelaus - lost his wife, literally.
Helen - the face that launched a thousand memes. Has the worst taste in men.
Paris - the biggest fuckboy in Greek mythology. I don't condone child abuse, but I can see why his parents wanted to kill him when he was a baby.
Hector - the perfect son, husband, father, brother, and prince. Tames horses in his spare time.
Andromache - the perfect wife, mother, and princess. The Kate Middleton of Greek mythology.
King Priam - had a hundred children. He's lucky child support didn't exist in ancient times.
Queen Hecuba - had nineteen children and a horny husband.
Briseis - in need of therapy.
Ajax the great - the OG alpha male macho man dude-bro.
Ajax the lesser - I guess he was a beta male?
Hera - to quote Lizzo, it's bad bitch o'clock.
Athena - it's ok to be a virgin. It's even better to be a virgin goddess of wisdom, warfare, and handicraft. I support Athena's war crimes.
Ares - cute but psycho.
Aphrodite - the OG Regina George.
The Myrmidons - The Greek mythology equivalent of Navy Seals
Aeneas - just kind of there.
Thetis - Achilles' sea nymph mommy
Poseidon - petty, vengeful, likes to play with dolphins in his free time (this has never been scientifically proven, it's just a theory)
Hephaestus - got cheated on by Aphrodite and tried to assault Athena, and for that, he will forever be on my shit list.
Hermes - in charge of Mount Olympus' post office.
Artemis - a cool virgin who likes to hunt.
Apollo - doesn't know the meaning of consent.
Zeus - doesn't know the meaning of consent.
Should I review the Odyssey? Was Odysseus the victim of a curse, or did he just not want to go home to his wife? 'Lost at sea' is the Greek mythology equivalent of 'going out for cigarettes.'
Greek mythology is unhinged, and I wouldn't have it any other way. I have a confession to make: I love the movie Troy. Critics make fun of it. Historians treat it like a redheaded stepchild. I don't care. I love it. My opinion has nothing to do with a skirt-clad Brad Pitt.
Patroclus - 'best friend' of Achilles. Ruined everything for everyone.
Odysseus - outsmarted the Trojans, had sex with a witch and a nymph.
Agamemnon - worst husband, worst father, worst Greek, worst human.
Menelaus - lost his wife, literally.
Helen - the face that launched a thousand memes. Has the worst taste in men.
Paris - the biggest fuckboy in Greek mythology. I don't condone child abuse, but I can see why his parents wanted to kill him when he was a baby.
Hector - the perfect son, husband, father, brother, and prince. Tames horses in his spare time.
Andromache - the perfect wife, mother, and princess. The Kate Middleton of Greek mythology.
King Priam - had a hundred children. He's lucky child support didn't exist in ancient times.
Queen Hecuba - had nineteen children and a horny husband.
Briseis - in need of therapy.
Ajax the great - the OG alpha male macho man dude-bro.
Ajax the lesser - I guess he was a beta male?
Hera - to quote Lizzo, it's bad bitch o'clock.
Athena - it's ok to be a virgin. It's even better to be a virgin goddess of wisdom, warfare, and handicraft. I support Athena's war crimes.
Ares - cute but psycho.
Aphrodite - the OG Regina George.
The Myrmidons - The Greek mythology equivalent of Navy Seals
Aeneas - just kind of there.
Thetis - Achilles' sea nymph mommy
Poseidon - petty, vengeful, likes to play with dolphins in his free time (this has never been scientifically proven, it's just a theory)
Hephaestus - got cheated on by Aphrodite and tried to assault Athena, and for that, he will forever be on my shit list.
Hermes - in charge of Mount Olympus' post office.
Artemis - a cool virgin who likes to hunt.
Apollo - doesn't know the meaning of consent.
Zeus - doesn't know the meaning of consent.
Should I review the Odyssey? Was Odysseus the victim of a curse, or did he just not want to go home to his wife? 'Lost at sea' is the Greek mythology equivalent of 'going out for cigarettes.'
Greek mythology is unhinged, and I wouldn't have it any other way. I have a confession to make: I love the movie Troy. Critics make fun of it. Historians treat it like a redheaded stepchild. I don't care. I love it. My opinion has nothing to do with a skirt-clad Brad Pitt.
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Reading Progress
Finished Reading
January 21, 2024
– Shelved
January 21, 2024
– Shelved as:
to-read
January 21, 2024
– Shelved as:
ancient-greece-rome-egypt
January 21, 2024
– Shelved as:
classics
January 21, 2024
– Shelved as:
historical
January 21, 2024
– Shelved as:
mythology
January 21, 2024
– Shelved as:
set-in-wartime-soldiers
Comments Showing 1-50 of 90 (90 new)
message 1:
by
inciminci
(new)
Jan 21, 2024 04:03AM
Ahahah! I love this 😄👍
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Love this review! And yes, Greek mythology is unhinged :)
You know what would've made the Pitt film better? If they included the part where no Gods come to back Hector up when he faces Achilles so he loses all courage previously instilled him by said Gods and runs around the walls of Troy like 3 times (??) being chased by Achilles! It could've been a tragicomedy! 😆Fun review, PP! 😁
P.S. I just had to edit this twice 'cos GR mobile app is an absolute disgrace and keeps cutting my comments in half! 🙄
Haha great review, PP! I'm glad you loved the movie Troy. It's been ages since I've seen it, but you're making me want to watch it again. I tried reading this book in high school and quickly gave up lol.
Absolutely wonderful review!, I wish I had this much, much earlier, it would have made reading this book in my Latin class so much better (#worst counselor ever)
I have never read this classic before. Great job, PP. Like you, I also enjoyed Troy a lot.
'Lost at sea' is the Greek mythology equivalent of 'going out for cigarettes.'🤣
Brilliant. This app needs more reviews like yours. Well done.
You had me smiling. I didn't have to read it. You got them all sussed out.
Best review of the Illiad ever. 5 stars. ⭐⭐⭐⭐� Only thing missing "Most of them were high, drunk, or both most of the time."
This is my favourite review I've ever read of The Iliad! I have a confession to make too: I read Song of Achilles & Circe by Madeline Miller, and I haven't read the originals and I feel like a complete heathen but I'm so so here for your review of the Odyssey if you review it too PP!
PP...a most awesome review! Perhaps I should give this a read!💛
OMG, I love this review so much! :D :D :D Your orca reviews are insightful but in Greek myth snark, you totally shine! Not surprising considering your GR username. :DAll the character bios are spot on. I laughed out loud at your introduction of Paris!
Excellent review, dear Perse. I love the movie Troy despite the skirt-clad Brad Pitt. ;P
![Imme [back from hiatus!] van Gorp](https://images.gr-assets.com/users/1700013408p1/101358081.jpg)
HAHHAAH this is cracking me up. Love this reviewing style🤣 I never read the Iliad in full, but know the story inside and out since I took Greek and Latin in high school, and most of your descriptions sound pretty spot on LOL
Hilarious because you nailed it so thoroughly! I do believe that Homer's out there laughing his. . . something off at your review
This is just perfect: it should be added as the official character guide for future high school students. 😂
inciminci wrote: "Ahahah! I love this 😄👍"Thank you, Inciminci :)
Alexandra wrote: "Love this review! And yes, Greek mythology is unhinged :)"Thank you, Alexandra. I wouldn't have it any other way :)
Jonathan wrote: "You know what would've made the Pitt film better? If they included the part where no Gods come to back Hector up when he faces Achilles so he loses all courage previously instilled him by said Gods..."*gasps* My beloved Eric Bana running around the walls of Troy being chased by Brad Pitt? Absolutely not! 😂
Dee wrote: "LOVE this review so much!!!"Thank you very much, Dee :)
Yun wrote: "Haha great review, PP! I'm glad you loved the movie Troy. It's been ages since I've seen it, but you're making me want to watch it again. I tried reading this book in high school and quickly gave u..."Thanks, Yun :) Troy is a masterpiece!
Baba wrote: "A wonderful review,,, love it!"Thank you, Baba :)
Kay wrote: "Terrific review PP!!😄"Thanks, Kay :)
Charles wrote: "Absolutely wonderful review!, I wish I had this much, much earlier, it would have made reading this book in my Latin class so much better (#worst counselor ever)"Thank you, Charles :) You flatter me.
Constantine wrote: "I have never read this classic before. Great job, PP. Like you, I also enjoyed Troy a lot."It's such a fun movie. Thank you, Constantine :)
Paulo - Listening "Dreaming of England" wrote: "'Lost at sea' is the Greek mythology equivalent of 'going out for cigarettes.'🤣
Brilliant. This app needs more reviews like yours. Well done."
Thank you kindly :)
Paul wrote: "You had me smiling. I didn't have to read it. You got them all sussed out."Thanks, Paul :)
Susan wrote: "Best review of the Illiad ever. 5 stars. ⭐⭐⭐⭐� Only thing missing "Most of them were high, drunk, or both most of the time."
The gifts of Dionysus 😆 Thank you, Susan.
Esta wrote: "This is my favourite review I've ever read of The Iliad! I have a confession to make too: I read Song of Achilles & Circe by Madeline Miller, and I haven't read the originals and I feel like a co..."
Circe is awesome. I've never read the Song of Achilles, but my mom did. 😆 Thank you so much, Esta.
Fran wrote: "PP...a most awesome review! Perhaps I should give this a read!💛"It's an interesting read, that's for sure. Thanks, Fran :)
Rosh (is busy; will catch up soon!) wrote: "OMG, I love this review so much! :D :D :D Your orca reviews are insightful but in Greek myth snark, you totally shine! Not surprising considering your GR username. :DAll the character bios are spo..."
You're too kind, dear Rosh. ❤️ I used to be obsessed with Greek mythology. I took a bit of a hiatus from deities, monsters, and beasts. Now I'm back in ancient times. Wish me luck. lol
Imme wrote: "HAHHAAH this is cracking me up. Love this reviewing style🤣 I never read the Iliad in full, but know the story inside and out since I took Greek and Latin in high school, and most of your descripti..."
Greek AND Latin? You're a smart lady. Thank you, Imme :)
Moonkiszt wrote: "Hilarious because you nailed it so thoroughly! I do believe that Homer's out there laughing his. . . something off at your review "That's a scary thought 😂 Thank you, Moonkiszt.
Ms. Smartarse wrote: "This is just perfect: it should be added as the official character guide for future high school students. 😂"I don't want to negatively influence impressionable young minds 😂 Thanks for the compliment!
Speaking of Brad Pitt, I would love to read how you describe the characters in his movie, FURY. :-)
That’s a brilliant summary, I love reference points like that. Thanks for sharing PP. 📚💕
Haha, hilarious summary! I like it. :)(Pssst... do read The Odyssey, the sex with the witch part isn't in The Iliad.)
Oh my, what an amazing review!! With such a summary The Iliad starts looking more accessible. Not sure if I ever decide to read it, though. :)Agamemnon is the one who killed his daughter? Ugh.
As far as I remember, Patroclus was presented in quite a sympathetic light in Miller's The Song of Achilles.
Thank you for creating these colorful portraits of all those ancient characters, my friend!
LOL some of these descriptions are hilarious. i've never been much into greek mythology so i don't know anything, really, but some of these are great. awesome review, persephone!
Joe wrote: "Speaking of Brad Pitt, I would love to read how you describe the characters in his movie, FURY. :-)"I haven't seen the movie in its entirety. It's a bit too gory for my taste :)
Graham “Smell the Ink� wrote: "That’s a brilliant summary, I love reference points like that. Thanks for sharing PP. 📚💕"Thanks, Graham :)
Marquise wrote: "Haha, hilarious summary! I like it. :)(Pssst... do read The Odyssey, the sex with the witch part isn't in The Iliad.)"
Things I know about The Odyssey: he pisses off Poseidon, gets shipwrecked, bangs Calypso and Circe. 😂
Nika wrote: "Oh my, what an amazing review!! With such a summary The Iliad starts looking more accessible. Not sure if I ever decide to read it, though. :)Agamemnon is the one who killed his daughter? Ugh.
As..."
Yes. I hate Agamemnon with a fiery passion. I've never read the Song of Achilles. At the risk of sounding like a hipster, I tend to avoid overhyped books. 😆 Thank you, my lovely friend.
elena ❀ wrote: "LOL some of these descriptions are hilarious. i've never been much into greek mythology so i don't know anything, really, but some of these are great. awesome review, persephone!"That's a good thing. Stay away from Greek mythology. Preserve your innocence and sanity. 😂 Thanks, Elena.
We have an early candidate for the Best ŷ Review of 2024! Fantastic summary PP!
Persephone's Pomegranate wrote: "Nika wrote: "Oh my, what an amazing review!! With such a summary The Iliad starts looking more accessible. Not sure if I ever decide to read it, though. :)Agamemnon is the one who killed his daugh..."
I hear you. :) I, too, usually prefer to stay away from overhyped books. But sometimes I'm tempted to try them, as it was with Miller's book. :)
I wonder who gets the most swipe-right if we put each of their bios on dating apps. Lol. Entertaining review, Persephone!👍😁
(On Film Festival Hiatus) Alan wrote: "We have an early candidate for the Best ŷ Review of 2024! Fantastic summary PP!"Thank you for the lovely compliment!
