ŷ������

Yea I know I said that I'm done with Ali Hazelwood books, but guess what?
I fuckin lied.
I’m glad I did, too, not because I condone lying or anything—trust me—but because despite my negativity towards the book in the first half by the end it more or less won me over. Like a romance should do—wait was I involved in an enemies to lovers trope with this book!?!?
Anyways, like the title, I’m not in love with this one and it feels very rushed and unpolished but I also didn’t hate it and I appreciate that Ali Hazelwood has been continuing to try new things, with a YA and a paranormal romance in the past year and while this is sort of a return to her STEM-style it is less romcom, more grit, way more spice and a lot more nuance and complex characters. So, alright, no more lies, lets talk about the book which is straightforward with its title because Rue and Eli are very much Not in Love.

Okay, fine, maybe love is up for discussion in the boardroom here but Not in Love launches us into the story of one-night-stands-only Rue wakes up from a lovely time with Eli to discover themselves on opposite sides of company finance issues. And so we begin an enemies-with-benefits to lovers narrative with Eli working to take possession of the food nanotech company Rue has fought through misogynistic university and STEM programs to work for. And I know what you are all wondering—is it once again a tiny gal with a huge hulking beast of man meat and tameable fury? Well, this time no!

Okay fine, she is actually a tall woman this time but yea, he’s fucking huge. And a hockey player with some hockey stuff that feels very tacked on. But also a finance bro trying to take over a company which is pretty thumbs down on his record and at first when I realized it was going to be all “but he’s actually a good person�� I thought “sounds unlikely, Ali�� but hell she pulled it off and by the end they work. It helps he’s absolutely into Rue even if he doesn’t want to admit it and Hazelwood throws some twists into the narrative that make the initial plot much more palatable.
Then again, so much of this is still just capitalism-as-kink but I appreciate Hazelwood really pushing her own boundaries here. There’s a lot of Eli pushing into Rue too which like…I’m fairly under versed in the genre but I don’t feel like Hazelwood is necessarily stellar at spicy scenes? I mean, maybe its just me but lines like ��are you anticipating curing me with your magic cock?�� are a bit clumsy at best, though I suppose sex between people trying to hate each other is always going to be clumsy. Also apparently Rue has space boobs that defy gravity.

No, Hazelwood said so, look: ��Her breasts bounced—a masterpiece of gravity.�� TOLD YA. But…like, why? Why, Ali? In all fairness you don’t necessarily read romance for the plot per say, so that’s more on me, I just thought this struggled a bit to push itself along and here the amount of space given to them feels unjustified by a relatively thin plot that is straining to uphold them. But that bed was also straining so good for them even if they are caught up in a “I want your job to collapse�� financial battle, though for all my hand wringing over that being annoying at least its real life and ends on a good note where I actually found the plotline about that to be handled alright.

��If i were able to love someone, i would choose you. In that timeline, I would want it to be you.��

I was intending to make this a short review but I’d like to quickly touch upon some thoughts I had regarding the characters. I LOVE messy characters, morally grey characters, characters that do well by reminding us people contain multitudes and the notion of people just being good or bad doesn’t hold up beyond Disney animations. Which I also love but that’s not my point. Hazelwood crafts some complex characters here where we see how their past traumas integrate with their present day personalities and interpersonal communications. Now, in terms of 2024 romances, I think this was all done more effectively by Emily Henry in Funny Story (which I discuss at length HERE) but I liked the ways we get into how growing up in poverty and food insecurity has haunted Rue and a childhood marked by the failure of a trusted adult lingers in big, beefy, “I’m into being dominant to the point of it being weird, have I mentioned my Ex-Fiance enough yet?�� Eli. The characterizations do, however, make them rather cold and stand-offish (Eli is super into that about Rue) which undercuts a lot of the emotion in this book and makes them feel like knocking blocks of wood against each other. Its a satisfying clang of their bang but also, its a bit lifeless? Authors like Sally Rooney, for instance, have had great success in navigating this but Hazelwood just…never really brings it to life here and while they are complex it still feels like 2D characters with backstories tacked on and also the friendships with other characters felt more like NPCs added into the plot rather than productively-explored relationships. But Florence is cool at least.

Shhhh! Anyways, I did enjoy the rotation between Rue and Eli’s perspectives, something that seems to be more common and was also a characteristic of Lynn Painter's recent Happily Never After, and gave a first person perspective of what Rue was thinking in her mind and a third-person perspective of Eli that allowed the narrative to sort of info-dump the board room aspects of the plot. Though with Rue there’s this aspect she has a Big Secret that, when it comes out, doesn’t actually seem like that big of a deal but also…if we are trying to stream-of-conscious her mind it feels awkward that she never ever actually thinks about it? In many ways it feels a bit contrived and like, I get that this is a book in service for the plot, but it just felt a bit underwhelming. Also the whole aspect of Eli being all like “oh I just really like inflicting pain on women to show im in charge�� being played off as just some orgasmic fun felt weird in a novel that also addresses the rampant abuse and oppression of women in STEM fields. Maybe those things are systemic Enjoy what you like though, I don’t care and it was implied it was always consensual but it just felt like some eye rolling straight man in finance needing to feel like CEO of the bedroom and like... lol. Whatever.

��If you still want me to love you, I really think I can love you back. Because I already do.�� Two tears streaked her cheekbones…and if you don’t, I guess I’ll be loving you anyway.��

At the end of the day, this wasn’t my favorite but I enjoyed it well enough and don’t regret reading it. It feels like a bit of a bridge between her lighter, romcom STEM books and a future in more gritty and complex relationship novels so theres a few stumbling blocks along the way but it is cool to see an author I have a soft spot for progressing. Gotta admit the whole “we don’t believe in love�� then actually do felt a little tired, and as Julia Armfield writes in Private Rites there’s ��nothing more tedious than a person who wears their aversion to commitment as a blazon of their own originality.�� Cute enough, a bit frustrating as it seems trying to force itself a bit and reads as if the writing was rather rushed, but altogether…it was a book? Though, maybe its time, I think this will be my last Hazelwood.

2.5/5