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“We all have a sphere of influence. Each of us needs to find our own sources of courage so that we can begin to speak. There are many problems to address, and we cannot avoid them indefinitely. We cannot continue to be silent. We must begin to speak, knowing that words alone are insufficient. But I have seen that meaningful dialogue can lead to effective action. Change is possible.”
― Beverly Daniel Tatum, Why Are All The Black Kids Sitting Together in the Cafeteria?

“What if I make a mistake?' you may be thinking. 'Racism is a volatile issue, and I don't want to say or do the wrong thing.' In almost forty years of teaching and leading workshops about racism, I have made many mistakes. I have found that a sincere apology and a genuine desire to learn from one's mistakes is usually rewarded with forgiveness. If we wait for perfection, we will never break the silence. The cycle of racism will continue uninterrupted.”
― Beverly Daniel Tatum, Why Are All The Black Kids Sitting Together in the Cafeteria?

“Many unlearning racism workshops focus on helping white individuals to see that they too are wounded by racism and as a consequence have something to gain from participating in anti-racist struggle. While in some ways true, a construction of political solidarity that is rooted in a narrative of shared victimization not only acts to recenter whites, it risks obscuring the particular ways racist domination impacts on the lives of marginalized groups. Implicit in the assumption that even those who are privileged via racist hierarchy suffer is the notion that it is only when those in power get in touch with how they too are victimized will they rebel against structures of domination. The truth is that many folks benefit greatly from dominating others and are not suffering a wound that is in any way similar to the condition of the exploited and oppressed.
Anti-racist work that tries to get these individuals to see themselves as "victimized" by racism in the hopes that this will act as an intervention is a misguided strategy. And indeed we must be willing to acknowledge that individuals of great privilege who are in no way victimized are capable, via their political choices, of working on behalf of the oppressed. Such solidarity does not need to be rooted in shared experience. It can be based on one's political and ethical understanding of racism and one's rejection of domination.”
― bell hooks, Black Looks: Race and Representation

“I prefer open hostility to the poisonous silence of supposed neutrality or the empty lip service of performative solidarity.”
― Jamie Arpin-Ricci

“Allyship born of heroism- not altruism- will ultimately be performative and harmful.”
― Jamie Arpin-Ricci

“One of the hardest lessons I have learned social justice work is that, even when oppressive systems are confronted and dismantled, those responsible will- more often than not- take hold of the narrative to mitigate responsibility. As a result, the oppressed still tend to bear the brunt of the fallout.

And what makes that even harder to process is that many people who would declare themselves "allies to the cause" will passively or actively buy into that false narrative because it is far easier and less costly than to walk in genuine solidarity.

I don't say this so that people will feel hopeless about their commitments to justice. Quite the opposite. If you know that this happens, you won't be as crushed when it does.”
― Jamie Arpin-Ricci

“I am surrounded by capable and powerful friends, and so I fear no monsters, none that we can fight with sword at least.”
― R.A. Salvatore, Streams of Silver

“Remember, and feel free to remind white allies, that you don’t need permission from anyone to pursue self-care.

Invite them to spend less time policing POC behavior and more time investigating long-standing systems of oppression and their impact.”
― Dalia Kinsey, Decolonizing Wellness

“Leading from the front is cliché. I lead from the back to push you forward or be there to catch you. I lead from the side because Im your ally and here to serve you. Leaders are accessible at all times.”
― Janna Cachola

“Many unlearning racism workshops focus on helping white individuals to see that they too are wounded by racism and as a consequence have something to gain from participating in anti-racist
struggle. While in some ways true, a construction of political solidarity that is rooted in a narrative of shared victimization not only acts to recenter whites, it risks obscuring the particular ways racist domination impacts on the lives of marginalized groups. Implicit in the assumption that even those who are privileged via racist hierarchy suffer is the notion that it is only when those in power get in touch with how they too are victimized will they rebel against structures of domination. The truth is that many folks benefit greatly from dominating others and are not suffering a wound that is in any way similar to the condition of the exploited and oppressed.
Anti-racist work that tries to get these individuals to see themselves as "victimized" by racism in the hopes that this will act as an intervention is a misguided strategy. And indeed we must be willing to acknowledge that individuals of great privilege who are in no way victimized are capable, via their political choices, of working on behalf of the oppressed. Such solidarity does not need to be rooted in shared experience. It can be based on one's political and ethical understanding of racism and one's rejection of domination.”
― bell hooks, Black Looks: Race and Representation

“If you think about how many magical Negro,
Native American, or wise Asian mentor tropes you’ve watched in movies over the years, it’s easy to understand why so many white folks have been brainwashed into believing that POC exist to support their growth and evolution.

The utter failure to comprehend that gaining respect and validation from white folks is not a ubiquitous goal for folks of color is exhausting.”
― Dalia Kinsey, Decolonizing Wellness

“You don’t have to dedicate your precious time to attempting to get faux allies to understand that while they are clearly the center of their universe, they are not the center of yours.”
― Dalia Kinsey, Decolonizing Wellness

“It is never the privileged outsider who gets to decide when they’re a good ally. Especially not if they want to use their status as an ally to excuse whatever they have done that has offended someone in the group they claim to be supporting.”
― Mikki Kendall, Hood Feminism: Notes from the Women That a Movement Forgot

“There is much more to doing good work than ‘making a differenceâ€�. There is the principle of first do no harm.”
― Nova Reid

“Often, the performative ally professes allegiance in order to distance themselves from potential scrutiny.”
― Carmen Morris

“Performative allyship does not engage on a complex level. It consists of low level, often ill-informed rhetorical statements that are usually obvious to Black and Brown employees and real allies, of the anti racist, racially inclusive agenda. It lacks genuine concern and does little to acknowledge the very behaviours that support structural and process driven racism.”
― Carmen Morris

“Anti-Racism is Not a Performance Game”
― Carmen Morris

“Showing up for others is one of the most powerful things you can do.”
― Naomi Evans, Being an Ally

“Inclusion is achievable. But to do so, we need more people with strong skills taking part in shaping a future that does more than simply replicate the status quo.”
― Suzy Levy, Mind the Inclusion Gap: How allies can bridge the divide between talking diversity and taking action

“Instead of looking at accommodations as a barrier, an inconvenience, see those shifts and changes as getting one step closer to all the compromises being made every minute of the day by a person with autism.”
― Carrie Rogers-Whitehead, Serving Teens and Adults on the Autism Spectrum: A Guide for Libraries

“On activism and influencing people:

"You approach such people by first accepting they don’t want the world you want. Their vision is different.”
― Loretta Ross

“I think we are doing ourselves a disservice when we say, "Everyone should be an ally!" because by giving the impression that it's so easy that everyone can do it, we diminish the role and the power allyship has. I'd rather have fewer people declare their intention to be an ally if those who did actually did the work required and did it right.”
― Lauren Wesley Wilson, What Do You Need?: How Women of Color Can Take Ownership of Their Careers to Accelerate Their Path to Success

“What do you need?" is always a more productive question than "How can I help?". It helps you learn about a person or a group, and it doesn't put the burden on them to instruct you on how to be an ally.”
― Lauren Wesley Wilson, What Do You Need?: How Women of Color Can Take Ownership of Their Careers to Accelerate Their Path to Success

“I know an invitation might seem like a minor act, but sometimes the little things seem so little that they get overlooked entirely.”
― Lauren Wesley Wilson, What Do You Need?: How Women of Color Can Take Ownership of Their Careers to Accelerate Their Path to Success

“If you are a part of a conversation in which your colleagues of color are being othered, it's incumbent upon you to speak up. Be the person to say, "This is not right" or "It's time that you learn her name", or "She actually doesn't look anything like the other woman you are confusing with her, except for the fact that they are both Asian".”
― Lauren Wesley Wilson, What Do You Need?: How Women of Color Can Take Ownership of Their Careers to Accelerate Their Path to Success

“In its simplest terms, allyship is about mentorship or sponsorship across race lines. It's about creating opportunities for colleagues of color that can help them advance in their careers. Think promotions, attendance at conferences, nominations for awards or speaker-positions, inclusion on high profile committees, teaching your young colleagues of color the soft skills and rules of the game that they might not have learned otherwise. Ask what they need, share what you can offer, and see what makes the most sense. Don't assume you know what they need, and don't ask for kudos for your behaviour. Contribute to the change and know that the benefits of your efforts will come back to you.”
― Lauren Wesley Wilson, What Do You Need?: How Women of Color Can Take Ownership of Their Careers to Accelerate Their Path to Success

“I want to share the stories of two young men. Their lives were in some ways very similiar, yet in other ways profoundly different. Their journey's explored the nature of justice, courage, and character. And both arrived at moments of devastating tragedy and death.
Both men left the safety of their homes, driven by a deep conviction to protect those they believed were in danger. Each took risks, crossing state lines, prepared to confront what they believed were threats to justice. Their actions would ripple outward, touching the lives of many others in ways that would change them forever.

One young man armed himself to protect businesses he saw threatened by escalating riots in the wake of a protest. That night, he shot three men, wounding one and killing two others. He was later exonerated of all charges. His name is 17-year-old Kyle Rittenhouse.
The other young man chose a different path. He participated in non-violent activism against systemic racism at the height of the Civil Rights movement. He lived with a Black family as a white man—a courageous act in a time and place where such things were almost unheard of.

Arrested for his work, he endured a week in brutal jail conditions before being released. Abandoned by authorities, he and his fellow activists were left to find their own way home. As they sought to quench their thirst at a store, a man blocked their entrance. He leveled a shotgun at one oft he young Black woman, and fired. In that instant, this young man did not hesitate to push her out of the way, saving her life but losing his own in the process. He was 26 years old. His name was Jonathan Daniels, an Episcopal seminarian.
Today is the feast day to remember and honour the life and sacrifice of Jonathan Daniels. Take some time to reflect on the choices, the work, and the love it took to bring him to that place- a place where, without only a moments thought- gave his life for another.

There is no greater love than this.”
― Jamie Arpin-Ricci

“This, with the kid gloves of gentility white libs always use when they want to make your annoyance feel unreasonable. The flop-sweating jargon invoked to signal their literacy on the subject of your existence. That fart holding wince when they sense their good intentions going unrewarded.”
― Tony Tulathimutte, Rejection

“I'm a girl. But sometimes I feel like a boy and a girl, both at the same time. They seems more right for me.”
― Amy Kaufman Burk, Hollywood Pride

“I'm always afraid the wrong person will figure out who I am.”
― Amy Kaufman Burk, Hollywood Pride