Ass Quotes
Quotes tagged as "ass"
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“Is my paranoia getting completely out of hand, or are you mongoloids really talking about me?”
― A Confederacy of Dunces
― A Confederacy of Dunces

“There are four kinds of people to avoid in the world: the assholes, the asswipes, the ass-kissers, and those that just will shit all over you.”
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“It is not your business to succeed, but to do right. When you have done so the rest lies with god.”
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“Who knows himself a braggart, let him fear this, for it will come to pass that every braggart shall be found an ass.”
― The Complete Works
― The Complete Works

“The day I can't pull something useful out of my ass is the day I quit sticking things up my ass.”
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“Art can blow us out of our pigeon hole. In deafness it may shout or scream, in blindness it may arrest our attention, in numbness it may shake up our mind. If we don鈥檛 sense anything at all and take everything for granted, art can kick us in the ass, give a conscience and make us aware. ("When is Art?")”
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“Then the high king carefully turned the golden screw. Once: Nothing. Twice: Nothing. Then he turned it the third time, and the boy鈥檚 ass fell off.”
― The Wise Man's Fear
― The Wise Man's Fear
“I decided to masturbate with shampoo instead of conditioner today. Because yolo. Things Jesus never said.”
― Sleepeth Not, the Bastard
― Sleepeth Not, the Bastard

“He kissed the plump mellow yellow smellow melons of her rump, on each plump melonous hemisphere, in their mellow yellow furrow, with obscure prolonged provocative melonsmellonous osculation.”
― Ulysses
― Ulysses

“At last, hopelessly surveying myself all over, I was obliged to face the mortifying fact that I had been transformed not into a bird, but into a plain jackass.”
― The Golden Ass
― The Golden Ass

“MADAME DE SAINT-ANGE 鈥� Divine teacher, will you resist the proposal? will you not be tempted by this sublime ass? See how it doth yawn, how it winks at thee!”
― Philosophy in the Boudoir
― Philosophy in the Boudoir

“DOLMANCE 鈥� Ah, there's nothing that can match fuck drained out of the depths of a pretty behind....'tis a food fit for the gods.”
― Philosophy in the Boudoir
― Philosophy in the Boudoir

“See the healer, Sage. We have a big week ahead of us, and I can鈥檛 afford you falling dead on me.鈥�
鈥淚 don鈥檛 think anyone鈥檚 ever died from a bruise on the ass, sir”
― Assistant to the Villain
鈥淚 don鈥檛 think anyone鈥檚 ever died from a bruise on the ass, sir”
― Assistant to the Villain

“PANTS: DARK PURPLE WITH A gold stripe up either side. Pressed and creased sharply down the middle, of course. Subtly flared at the hems over shined and waxed narrow-tip dewback-skin boots, sloping inward and tight toward the top. Tight enough for a bulge and the insinuation of an ass.”
― Last Shot: A Han and Lando Novel
― Last Shot: A Han and Lando Novel

“Charles used to say, 鈥淚f God had meant boys to be fucked, he would have put a hole in their ass.”
― The Unpunished Vice: A Life of Reading
― The Unpunished Vice: A Life of Reading
“Grab her ass because it's what every guy in the room wants to do. Grab her ass because nothing makes a woman feel better than the envy of other women.”
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“Is no revenge of the nerds, you know what, last year when everything collapsed, all it meant was the nerds lost out once again and the jocks won. Same as always ... Some of the quants are smart, but quants come, quants go, they're just nerds for hire with a different fashion sense. The jocks may not know a stochastic crossover if it bites them on the ass, but they have that drive to thrive, they're synced in to them deep market rhythms, and that'll always beat out nerditude no matter how smart it gets.”
― Bleeding Edge
― Bleeding Edge
“Miss. Bare-Ass was wealthy as hell and probably old money if she managed to get into a building on Fifth near the MET.”
― The Abyss Gazes Back: A Novel
― The Abyss Gazes Back: A Novel

“An ass cannot value the fragrance of Safran. Similarly, a shameless cannot feel the waves of shame or insult.”
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“Words are enough for a good man but a good beating for an ass. Water is enough for a teetotaler but a strong drink for a drinker.”
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“Why are you walking like that?鈥� he clipped at me and I immediately straightened, sharing a look with Sin.
鈥淚 crushed his balls a minute ago,鈥�
鈥淲hy?鈥� Hastings balked.
鈥淗e likes it,鈥� Sin answered, smooth as fucking butter and I chewed the inside of my cheek to bite back my irritation.
鈥淲hy would you like something like that?鈥� Hastings asked me in alarm.
鈥淚 just鈥o,鈥� I said, feigning enthusiasm. 鈥淣othing like a knee to the balls or a fist squeezing them until I nearly black out.鈥�
鈥淏y the stars,”
― Alpha Wolf
鈥淚 crushed his balls a minute ago,鈥�
鈥淲hy?鈥� Hastings balked.
鈥淗e likes it,鈥� Sin answered, smooth as fucking butter and I chewed the inside of my cheek to bite back my irritation.
鈥淲hy would you like something like that?鈥� Hastings asked me in alarm.
鈥淚 just鈥o,鈥� I said, feigning enthusiasm. 鈥淣othing like a knee to the balls or a fist squeezing them until I nearly black out.鈥�
鈥淏y the stars,”
― Alpha Wolf

“I鈥檒l be all hugs and kisses. Especially because he鈥檚 wound so tight that if I hug him hard enough, a diamond will probably pop out of his ass. Then I鈥檒l be rich and we can pay for that lawyer."
"Your aunt Clara says she isn鈥檛 sure which is more disturbing: that image of diamonds popping out or of you collecting them despite knowing where they鈥檝e been”
― Jenny: The Hellfire Riders
"Your aunt Clara says she isn鈥檛 sure which is more disturbing: that image of diamonds popping out or of you collecting them despite knowing where they鈥檝e been”
― Jenny: The Hellfire Riders
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