Duck Quotes
Quotes tagged as "duck"
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“Jumping out a window five hundred feet above ground is not usually my idea of fun. Especially when I'm wearing bronze wings and flapping my arms like a duck.”
― The Battle of the Labyrinth
― The Battle of the Labyrinth

“Be like a duck, paddling and working very hard inside the water, but what everyone sees is a smiling and calm face.”
― From the Rat Race to Financial Freedom
― From the Rat Race to Financial Freedom

“Small men oft feel a need to prove their courage with unseemly boasts," he declared. "I doubt if he could kill a duck."
Tyrion shrugged. "Fetch the duck.”
― A Dance with Dragons
Tyrion shrugged. "Fetch the duck.”
― A Dance with Dragons

“Let鈥檚 go see who can eat the most dumplings in the shortest amount of time. And duck! You really ought to try pressed duck! It鈥檚 a great delicacy.鈥� Jem looked at Will, suppressing a smile. His friend glared back, but at last neither of them could hold back their laughter. Will said, 鈥淭here is nothing so sweet as feasting upon the bones of my enemies. Especially with you at my side.”
― Learn About Loss
― Learn About Loss

“Because human beings suffer so much more than ducks.鈥�
鈥淵ou might not think so if you were a duck.”
― The Book of Strange New Things
鈥淵ou might not think so if you were a duck.”
― The Book of Strange New Things

“To begin cooking duck at one in the morning is one of the finest acts of madness that can be undertaken by a human being who is not mad.”
― La soledad del manager
― La soledad del manager

“I once saw two ducks brawling, and I thought, "Hey, it's a pre-pillow fight." It was so violent that it made me want to capture their energy and take a nap.”
― BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm presents: Two Ducks Brawling Is A Pre-Pillow Fight
― BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm presents: Two Ducks Brawling Is A Pre-Pillow Fight

“Coaching is the only thing where the more someone else practices, the better you get. That鈥檚 my kind of hard work.
People always ask me, "Jarod, how come you don't have a Guinness World Record for getting others to do what you aren't capable of doing?"
I tell them I don't worry about awards, because I'm a buy-my-own-trophies kind of guy.
Plus, I'm too busy being the greatest duck farmer in history.
Then I give them the customer service number to call at Guinness, because that's a good question that demands to be answered.”
― Duck Quotes For The Ages. Specifically ages 18-81.
People always ask me, "Jarod, how come you don't have a Guinness World Record for getting others to do what you aren't capable of doing?"
I tell them I don't worry about awards, because I'm a buy-my-own-trophies kind of guy.
Plus, I'm too busy being the greatest duck farmer in history.
Then I give them the customer service number to call at Guinness, because that's a good question that demands to be answered.”
― Duck Quotes For The Ages. Specifically ages 18-81.

“The best thing about an air sandwich is between the two slices of bread there exists the possibility of flight. And if those two slices of bread are soggy, then you have just created Duck Heaven.”
― BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm presents: Two Ducks Brawling Is A Pre-Pillow Fight
― BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm presents: Two Ducks Brawling Is A Pre-Pillow Fight

“Have you ever noticed that neither cats nor dogs ever laugh? I used to think I was doing something wrong, that maybe I needed to start telling better jokes. But no, all I needed to do was get a different audience. That's when I discovered ducks.”
― Duck Quotes For The Ages. Specifically ages 18-81.
― Duck Quotes For The Ages. Specifically ages 18-81.

“Every time a duck talks to you, it says, "Quack." That's a species so advanced it has reduced the complexity of communication down to a one-word language.”
― Duck Quotes For The Ages. Specifically ages 18-81.
― Duck Quotes For The Ages. Specifically ages 18-81.

“You and I don鈥檛 even have to speak to communicate. Body language is wordless telepathy. Collectively, ducks are The William Wordsworth of unwritten and unspoken poetry, so what are words really worth?”
― Duck Quotes For The Ages. Specifically ages 18-81.
― Duck Quotes For The Ages. Specifically ages 18-81.

“People have been stabbed over spicy chicken sandwiches. The duck farm industry could benefit from that kind of violence to help increase sales.”
― One Out of Ten Dentists Agree: This Book Helps Fight Gingivitis. Maybe Tomorrow I鈥檒l Ask Nine More Dentists.: A BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm Production
― One Out of Ten Dentists Agree: This Book Helps Fight Gingivitis. Maybe Tomorrow I鈥檒l Ask Nine More Dentists.: A BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm Production

“After watching my ducks swim, I started writing poetry using body language. If I could also time travel, I'd go back and ask Wordsworth, "What are words worth?”
― One Out of Ten Dentists Agree: This Book Helps Fight Gingivitis. Maybe Tomorrow I鈥檒l Ask Nine More Dentists.: A BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm Production
― One Out of Ten Dentists Agree: This Book Helps Fight Gingivitis. Maybe Tomorrow I鈥檒l Ask Nine More Dentists.: A BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm Production

“I don鈥檛 play music. In fact, I don鈥檛 play music so well that I鈥檓 The Mozart of Silence. You should witness how my ducks enjoy water dancing to my soundlessness.”
― One Out of Ten Dentists Agree: This Book Helps Fight Gingivitis. Maybe Tomorrow I鈥檒l Ask Nine More Dentists.: A BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm Production
― One Out of Ten Dentists Agree: This Book Helps Fight Gingivitis. Maybe Tomorrow I鈥檒l Ask Nine More Dentists.: A BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm Production

“At BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm, our customer service representatives work 24/7 to make sure you are satisfied. If nobody answers your call within five rings, like The Olympics logo, call back in four years.”
― BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm presents: Two Ducks Brawling Is A Pre-Pillow Fight
― BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm presents: Two Ducks Brawling Is A Pre-Pillow Fight

“Ducks quack like a cacophony of saxophone. At least, they sound like how I play jazz. If you're looking for an elevator musician, I am FOR HIRE.”
― BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm presents: Two Ducks Brawling Is A Pre-Pillow Fight
― BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm presents: Two Ducks Brawling Is A Pre-Pillow Fight

“A library without books is not a library at all. Well, what is it then? It鈥檚 a room full of shelves to keep all your ducks.”
― One Out of Ten Dentists Agree: This Book Helps Fight Gingivitis. Maybe Tomorrow I鈥檒l Ask Nine More Dentists.: A BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm Production
― One Out of Ten Dentists Agree: This Book Helps Fight Gingivitis. Maybe Tomorrow I鈥檒l Ask Nine More Dentists.: A BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm Production

“At Sonic I just paid for two large Dr. Peppers. The curious part is I ordered one sweet tea. That's the kind of money-making transaction I need to adopt at BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm. Buy Two, Get One of Lesser Value.”
― BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm presents: Two Ducks Brawling Is A Pre-Pillow Fight
― BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm presents: Two Ducks Brawling Is A Pre-Pillow Fight

“Ducks communicate by quacking. Though it sounds like they are endlessly repeating themselves, what if their language functions at such a high cognitive level that it's so efficient that it reduces all thoughts down to one word, without the possibility of being misunderstood?”
― Duck Quotes For The Ages. Specifically ages 18-81.
― Duck Quotes For The Ages. Specifically ages 18-81.

“I wrote a duck dictionary. It's got one word in it that's defined鈥攖he word Quack. However, it's as thick as a normal dictionary, because that one word means everything.”
― Duck Quotes For The Ages. Specifically ages 18-81.
― Duck Quotes For The Ages. Specifically ages 18-81.

“I've never had a spicy chicken sandwich worth getting stabbed over. But that's the kind of organic marketing experience I'd like to bring to duck farming.”
― One Out of Ten Dentists Agree: This Book Helps Fight Gingivitis. Maybe Tomorrow I鈥檒l Ask Nine More Dentists.: A BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm Production
― One Out of Ten Dentists Agree: This Book Helps Fight Gingivitis. Maybe Tomorrow I鈥檒l Ask Nine More Dentists.: A BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm Production

“Mold won鈥檛 grow on McDonald鈥檚. So, if a lifeform with no brain won鈥檛 even eat their food, what鈥檚 that say about the intellects of McDonald鈥檚 customers? BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm caters to more discerning consumers.”
― Duck Quotes For The Ages. Specifically ages 18-81.
― Duck Quotes For The Ages. Specifically ages 18-81.

“My love is a dandelion in a tornado, and hers is a lit birthday candle in a hurricane. That's why my Duck Soup has that slight taste of WindFlower.”
― BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm presents: Two Ducks Brawling Is A Pre-Pillow Fight
― BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm presents: Two Ducks Brawling Is A Pre-Pillow Fight

“I am the Mister Rogers Bannister of swimming coaches for ducks. My services are available in underwater vending machines in ponds all across The Ozarks.”
― BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm presents: Two Ducks Brawling Is A Pre-Pillow Fight
― BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm presents: Two Ducks Brawling Is A Pre-Pillow Fight

“The dandelion gives all of its future to ride on the wind for one beautiful moment. I'll bet my flightless Pekin ducks would trade their life away to become one with the breeze.”
― Music is fluid, and my saxophone overflows when my ducks slosh in the sounds I make in elevators.
― Music is fluid, and my saxophone overflows when my ducks slosh in the sounds I make in elevators.

“I dance like my legs are made of Jell-O. I know, exotic and romantic, right? But my dancing also now comes in Duck Soup Flavor, and is FOR SALE in small, medium, and buffet-style.”
― BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm presents: Two Ducks Brawling Is A Pre-Pillow Fight
― BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm presents: Two Ducks Brawling Is A Pre-Pillow Fight

“Who would you rather buy your Duck Soup from, me or some other guy? OK fine, but what if that other guy is SOLD OUT? Then what? What do you mean you'll just go to Popeyes for a Spicy Chicken Sandwich?!”
― BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm presents: Two Ducks Brawling Is A Pre-Pillow Fight
― BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm presents: Two Ducks Brawling Is A Pre-Pillow Fight

“I just had both of my knees replaced with Rubik鈥檚 Cubes, and I run like a clock using its hands to do push-ups. BearPaw Duck Farm鈥檚 Powdered Egg Substitute Protein Mix can also turn you into an Xtreme athlete.”
― BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm presents: Two Ducks Brawling Is A Pre-Pillow Fight
― BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm presents: Two Ducks Brawling Is A Pre-Pillow Fight
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