ŷ������

“In a traditional German toilet, the hole into which shit disappears after we flush is right at the front, so that shit is first laid out for us to sniff and inspect for traces of illness. In the typical French toilet, on the contrary, the hole is at the back, i.e. shit is supposed to disappear as quickly as possible. Finally, the American (Anglo-Saxon) toilet presents a synthesis, a mediation between these opposites: the toilet basin is full of water, so that the shit floats in it, visible, but not to be inspected. [...] It is clear that none of these versions can be accounted for in purely utilitarian terms: each involves a certain ideological perception of how the subject should relate to excrement. Hegel was among the first to see in the geographical triad of Germany, France and England an expression of three different existential attitudes: reflective thoroughness (German), revolutionary hastiness (French), utilitarian pragmatism (English). In political terms, this triad can be read as German conservatism, French revolutionary radicalism and English liberalism. [...] The point about toilets is that they enable us not only to discern this triad in the most intimate domain, but also to identify its underlying mechanism in the three different attitudes towards excremental excess: an ambiguous contemplative fascination; a wish to get rid of it as fast as possible; a pragmatic decision to treat it as ordinary and dispose of it in an appropriate way. It is easy for an academic at a round table to claim that we live in a post-ideological universe, but the moment he visits the lavatory after the heated discussion, he is again knee-deep in ideology.”
― Slavoj Žižek, The Plague of Fantasies

“Writers often have the cleanest windows, floors, fridges and toilets, the most up-to-date filing system or the best record for returning calls or e-mails because, in the moment, just about any task seems more palatable than sitting down to write.�� (p.136)”
― Mark David Gerson, The Voice of the Muse: Answering the Call to Write

“There probably was a time when the idea of having a toilet inside a house was repulsive.”
― Mokokoma Mokhonoana

“One of the main functions of a push-up bra is to lower the number of mothers who seem like mothers.”
― Mokokoma Mokhonoana

“The reason is that even in a fantasy there is nothing even remotely erotic about a toilet bowl. In fact, considered as an accoutrement to a sexual encounter, a toilet bowl is a real cold shower.”
― Helen DeWitt, Lightning Rods

“Most people would rather eat inside a windowless room in which they have just defecated than eat inside one in which someone else has just farted, even if the room does not have a toilet.”
― Mokokoma Mokhonoana

“Dress kinda tough-like ‘ya, I can handle toilets.�� Dress with authority over a toilet.”
― Ashley Alcantar

“I'm the bathroom master
I'm a real bowl blaster
Don't mess with me
'Cause I can mess it up faster
With just one flush
I can make a toilet gush
When my sister cleans it up
I just turn her to mush!”
― R.U. Slime, Stay Out of the Bathroom

“Here is an interesting side note about burglary psychology. Many burglary reports, after itemizing a list of stolen possessions, note that the burglar has defecated in the house, sometimes in a corner, on the floor, and sometimes in the bathroom, and sometimes in the shrubbery outside, beneath the broken window. I remember one burglary victim telling me, “He took all the stereo equipment in the den, ransacked the bedroom and then took a shit in the bathroom but didn’t flush. I came home and found a big turd floating in the toilet!�� It almost seems to add insult to injury, doesn't It? Actually, there is a physical reason for this. Burglarizing a house causes the burglar to produce stress hormones, like Noradrenaline, corisol and adrenaline. Often an extreme amount of stress hormones can be created while in the act of burglarizing a home. And some people react to stress by taking a shit. Not flushing the toilet, that’s the insult part.”
― Don Dupay, Behind the Badge in River City: A Portland Police Memoir

“For breakfast to be called ‘in bed�� instead of ‘on top of a bed,�� the house in which it is about to be eaten has to have at least two rooms (excluding the kitchen); (at least) three, if it has a bathroom.”
― Mokokoma Mokhonoana

“Passing their toilet training is the very last thing that some adults did that has made their parents proud of them.”
― Mokokoma Mokhonoana

“I used to think that size does not count, until I realized that most people either find other people’s faeces more disgusting than a bird’s droppings, or they do not find the latter disgusting at all.”
― Mokokoma Mokhonoana

“Αλλά πέρα από τις κοιλάδες στα ανατολικά ο ουρανός αλλάζει,είναι ο βρωμοήλιος ξανά,στην ώρα του σαν τον δήμιο.Κρατηθείτε τώρα,θα δούμε ένα από τα θαύματα της γης,και επιπλέον τους εαυτούς μας,η νύχτα δεν άλλαξε τίποτα,είναι μόνο το καπάκι του απόπατου,είμαστε τυχεροί που έχει καπάκι,οι αδελφοί μας είναι εδώ για να διαλύσουν τις ελπίδες μας,αν έχουμε καμιά,οι αμέτρητοι αδελφοί μας,και η αναγούλα που μας έρχεται,και όλες οι παλιές ξαφνικές σουβλιές.”
― Samuel Beckett,Άρης Μπερλής

“Campgrounds are never comfortable. They are merely less awful than other options. In normal circumstances, if told that the nearest available toilet was half a mile away, up a dirt path frequented by animals in gastric distress, one would lock the doors and speed to civilization. When a tent or camper is involved, one is jubilant. At least this site had flush toilets!”
― Thomm Quackenbush, Holidays with Bigfoot

“Working toilets were in demand during the hurricane Ian disaster.”
― Steven Magee

“Many toilets stopped working in the aftermath of hurricane Ian.”
― Steven Magee